- Okay guys, welcome to another episode of The Rachel Cruze Show. And this episode is pretty special because I have my brother and sister here. Guys, welcome. - Thanks, Rachel.
- Thank you. - How does it feel in here? You love it? - It's good.
- Cozy. - Good, good, good. - Homey, yeah. - Thank you, thank you. Well, we have Denise and Daniel. Okay, so say, you don't have to do age, but like married, not married, kids, not, so people
can kind of get a grasp of like, okay. Cause you're older. You're the oldest. - Yes, I'm the oldest. And so, yeah, we're two and
a half years difference. And I'm married with three little babies. Three babes. - [Both] Yes. - Yeah, yeah. I'm the youngest, yeah. You're four years older than me. - [Rachel] Yes. - And Denise is six years older than me. So I was born a little bit
after some of the drama but learned all the hard lessons, so. - That's right, that's right. And married, to sweet Allison. - Yeah, married to my wife Allison. - And a babe coming. - And a baby on the way. - [Rachel] Yeah, so fun. - Later this summer. - So everyone on the show or
most people that watch know kind of the Ramsey story
and the bankruptcy, and that I was born the
year that that happened. So you were like two and a half-ish. I was born that year, Daniel came a little bit after. So, when I was writing the book, "Know Yourself, Know Your Money" and I was doing the manuscript
of the childhood classrooms, realizing that money is
communicated in two ways. It's communicated
verbally and emotionally, and it creates kind of
these four classrooms. So I said in the book that I felt like we grew up in classroom number four (bell dings) which is the stable money classroom or the secure money classroom. And that is where it's verbally
open and emotionally calm. So, I'm gonna just throw it out here 'cause I said in the book too, like siblings can have
a different perspective. So do you all think we
grew up in that classroom or a different one? - I would think we grew up in that one. - [Rachel] Okay. - Yeah, I mean I feel like especially 'cause mom and dad were so open at the, I mean, especially at that point, so it was still so new that they were like in the teaching mode and so they all they wanted
to do was like teach us 'cause they were excited and like they didn't want us
to screw up like they did. - Yes. - And so, yeah, it was calm, but like exciting calm,
if that makes sense. - Yeah totally. - So they made it fun. - Yes, yes. Do you think we grew up in that classroom? - Yeah, for sure. I mean, it was never stressed. It was open, but we talked about, hey, we're not gonna do something because this is not part of the plan. It was more of a reason of discipline than actually like, us not, you know, being able to or us being stressed about it. So yeah.
- [Rachel] Yeah, yep Yeah, so one of those, again part of that quadrant
is the verbal communication, we just said that. So it's either, for people, closed or open and we would say we are
an open verbal family. - Oh yeah.
- Would you agree? - Yes, we are.
- Absolutely. (all laughing) - Including some debates, so. - Oh, we love family debates. - Yeah. - We can get into it, we can get into it. But when it comes to money, like you guys said, we talked about it. So what are a couple of ways or do you have any memories
of talking about money whether it's something you wanted to buy or anything like that? - Yeah, I mean, when you first said that, all I thought about was Sundays. Like Sunday was payday for us. - [Rachel] Yes. - And so we'd get our little chore charts and go down and like figure out, okay, I did this chore,
I didn't do this chore and we got paid. And so, I mean, I'm sitting
in the living room floor and like dividing out, like giving, spending, saving. And so even at a young
age, we were doing that. And so just having those real
conversations with Mom and Dad about spending like, okay, this is, I was saving up for a
Barbie doll or whatever. And so being able to go to the store and be able to purchase that or, yeah, or saving for my car. So, I mean, so yeah, we had
those like real conversations. - Yes, yes. - Yeah, it was good, open dialogue where we actually understood. I feel like they really
taught us the value of it, of like earning it and that it's not limitless like their pocketbook, their ability to give us money or us to earn like, it has to be earned.
It can't just be found. - Right, yeah. So one thing that I feel
like parents struggle with you probably feel like
this with your kids. I'm like, how do we, how to raise kids that are not entitled that are not spoiled, that understand the
value of a dollar, right? And like doing commissions and all of that I think is a great foundation
to start with your kids. But as we grew older, I mean, Mom and Dad became
more and more successful. And when you do what we teach
over a long period of time, you're gonna build wealth. When you're out of debt, you're investing, you're saving, you're giving, mathematically that's
pretty much what occurs, if that's what you do consistently. So, when we were, you know,
probably in high school I feel like I was still told no, even though Mom and Dad had
the ability to give us things and whether that's a nice purse or buying something cheap at Target, but like it wasn't the price
that made the difference. Like I always look back like, and they did that really well 'cause I feel like we somewhat we're not perfect by any means. But I feel like they did
a great job balancing blessings in life but yet putting
that responsibility on us. Does that make sense? - Yeah. - And do you have any
thoughts around that? Cause people ask a lot, how not to raise entitled, spoiled kids. How do you think Mom and Dad did that? - Yeah. - Considering y'all are
not spoiled and entitled, which they might be just a little bit. (laughing loudly) I'm the good one. - I mean, one thing that
stands out to me is, I remember, you know, we lived very, we lived very modestly, even when they could afford stuff. And I don't think I
realize how successful, you know, our parents were and how good they were financially until I got older and saw them loosen the reigns on themselves and saw them starting
to buy different cars and they moved houses
and things like that. I got, I had no idea. And then asking them
the questions afterwards made me realize they
were way more intentional and they weren't, they were
living way below their means for a lot longer time than I realized. And so, so yeah. - It was just the thing more
is caught than taught, right? - [Both] Yeah. - Like when you watch your parents have a boundary with money, whether they can or can't,
it's is it necessary, that automatically gives
influence on your kids. Your kids are watching you. - [Denise] Yes. - It's huge, it's so huge. (upbeat music) Today we're talking about things we need to stop wasting $20 on. Baby shoes. Mmm hmm, they're babies. They're not walking around.
Don't buy shoes for them. Lottery tickets. Yeah, the Powerball jackpot. You got one in 292 million
chances of winning, so don't waste your money. An Olaf waffle maker. I mean, pretty dang cute, I know. And the results, adorable, but let it go. Wipe warmers. Yeah, the baby is gonna survive. Keep your $20. Clothes for your pets. (dog barking) I mean, super cute, fabulous,
bougie, all the things, but you don't need to spend $20 on it. Guys, these things are
totally unnecessary. What I do need to make
sure I'm taking care of are these guys. I remember when Winston
and I first got married and we talked about life insurance. Honestly, it was easy for us to talk about because we wanted to
keep each other covered in case the worst were to ever happen. That's why we have term life insurance through Zander Insurance. It's $20 to $30 a month that
I am more than happy to spend. Zander shops the top-rated
term life insurance companies to make sure that they
find you the best rates for the coverage that your family needs. You can have the same
peace of mind that we have. So go to zander.com to get started today. Don't waste any more time. (upbeat music) Okay, what's a time,
speaking of boundaries, that Mom and Dad said no to you? That you were like,
man, I really want that and they were like, mmm, nope. Like a teenager. Is there any time that was like, man. - Yeah, I do have a memory of going to Best Buy when I was a kid and I'd saved up all this
money to buy a Game Boy, and I remember I didn't calculate the tax. Like I knew how much it cost and I showed up with the
right amount of money and I didn't have the money for the tax, cause I just, you know, who knew? That was a good lesson in it of itself. And I remember going and purchasing it but I couldn't afford a game
because I had to pay the tax. So I bought this Game Boy without a game. (all laughing) I think I remember, I don't how sure exactly but I think I remember
my mom bailing me out and then me paying her back, like, you know when we got
home or something like that. So like, it's not like they were hard-core on every little thing. - Yes.
- You're right. - Like she felt bad for
me and she recognized it but it still stuck with me. I still learned the
lesson, even though she, you know, she helped me out a little bit. - Yes, yes, that's good, that's good. The Game Boy. - The Game Boy. - Yeah. - Tetris. - [Both] Oh yeah. - Do you have any stories, Denise? - God, I know it's some similar. I mean, just like being a girl, I mean you were like the
fun shoes and the fun purses and so just, I mean, at
Christmastime and stuff, you know. - [Rachel] Yeah. - Wanted to ask for something
and they're like, no, like you are a teenager.
You don't need to be buying or like asking for these types of things. - [Rachel] Yes, totally, totally. - So, yeah.
- That's so good. Okay, So what is one thing that you will duplicate,
replicate if you will, that Mom and Dad did that you loved? And then is there anything,
if not, no big deal, is there anything you would do different? - I don't know, that's something we've already
kind of started with our kids and we have like the
little junior chore charts. - [Rachel] Yes. - [Denise] And so they're
hanging up on the fridge. They love being able to, okay, I made up my bed I gotta run downstairs
and put my check mark. So just starting that process early and then also just teaching
them to give at an early age 'cause I think that's so important and such a firm foundation to start on. That, I mean, I remember looking back and that was something
that we started so early and that's something
that's been implanted in us that it hasn't even been
a question now as adults. Like the first thing you
do, tithe it to the church. And so, it doesn't, it's
not that big of a deal, you know, if that makes sense. - Yeah, which is such a good point 'cause when you change your money habits to say, okay I'm gonna do
something new like giving, like maybe as an adult, you never did give and you're like, now I wanna start that, it's kind of this new
muscle you have to build. But when it's all you know you don't have to learn anything new, It's just part of it. - [Denise] Yeah, exactly,
it's just part of life. - That's great, the giving, I love that. - Yeah, the giving is something that came front of mind for me was like, I remember at church, you
know, watching our dad put the check in the tithe, you know? And I remember one day he stopped doing it and being like, I was like what the heck? And he is like, oh, I
started doing it online, or I started mailing it or he said something like that. And I remember being like, oh, okay. You know, but they involved
us in their giving. They talked about it and
they gave us opportunities. I remember around Christmastime us go into the grocery store at Kroger and you know, watching people go in and handing them money as they went in, people that looked like they could use it and then we prayed over that process. And that was really life-changing. - Anything you would do different? People always ask me this question a lot and I always say, like the principles of what we learn, no. I mean, I'm still gonna. - Yeah, not that they did it perfectly. - No. - They are like.
- Right. - They did. - What's yours, Daniel? Do you have one? - I mean, I just thought about your book, where you talked about
mom stealing popcorn. - Oh yeah. (all laughing) - Oh yeah. - Yeah, and not justifying
being cheap in really crazy ways but, yeah, okay. - That is good, that is good. - [Both] Yes. - Yeah, just being able to
actually spend your money. - Being at Cracker Barrel and taking all the jelly
and putting it in your purse and you're like. - Maple syrup. - Or maple syrup, oh yeah, all of it. All of it, that's so funny. I guess, I think I would do the car thing. I love the matching 16. - [Both] Yeah. - Well, even college, I feel
like they were a little bit, which is funny to say, it's kind of the opposite
extreme of what you would think, they did not make us work in college. Sometimes summers they're like, you have to be productive
and do something. But there's a level of skin in the game I think I may want my
kids to do with college. I don't know what that
looks like, what capacity. - [Denise] Yeah. - But I kind, I'm leaning
that way right now for some reason. - [Denise] Oh, yeah. - It's something I thought about. - [Both] Yeah. - I know they gave, yeah during college, they helped us out so we
wouldn't have to get a job, but I remember I took
on a job during school, I think for a year and a half. Although I had a little bit
of money from our parents, like it was enough to
get by and it was fine, it wasn't over the top by any means. And just having extra money in
my pocket gave me more pride, it gave me more ownership, and yeah, I felt like I
was way more intentional. - [Rachel] Yeah, yeah. - Because. - [Rachel] With that. - Because of all that.
- Yeah. - So as we close out, what is one piece of encouragement
you could give parents that are on Baby Step 2, they're working their way out of debt, they're sacrificing,
they're maybe working extra, they're saying no to
their kids all the time, 'cause they just wanna get out of debt. And it's that strenuous process and it's hard when you have littles running around the house. - [Denise] Oh yeah. - And so that's what Mom and Dad did. So what's one encouragement you can give those parents? Because I know for me, growing up and knowing that
my parents did something, sacrificed something for
me, changed everything. Like when I saw, oh wow, they did that, it's when you're a little bit older, but they did that and
then the lessons I learned because of the boundaries they set is probably what gives me a little bit of self-control today. - [Both] Yeah. - When it comes to my money. So that's always my
encouragement to parents that you're not harming your
kids by telling them no. - No. - And by the sacrifice. So what would y'all
say in your perspective like what would you tell that family? - Yeah, I mean, I would
just say just be open and like talk about what's going on, and yeah just share what's going on. - [Rachel] Yeah, have the conversation. - Yeah, have the conversation
and share what's going on. - [Rachel] That's good. - And explain why and be like, you know, we're doing this now so later we can really
enjoy going out to eat or really going on vacations, and we get to really celebrate
when we get to do that. - Yeah, that's awesome, that's awesome. - [Denise] Yeah. - Yeah, I can think back to just memories of us whining a lot or complaining like not going
out to lunch after church and stuff like that and
just begging for things and looking back I'm so glad we didn't because like although
we missed out on like, you know great breadsticks or something like that at a restaurant. - [All] Olive Garden! - But although we missed out on that, you don't remember that. What you remember is what you learned. And we learned the discipline and the value and the intentionality. And it's not that we couldn't
afford going out to eat so much as we already had
a meal planned at home like we'd already bought
the groceries for it and like sticking to it, so. - [Both] Yeah. - That's good, that's good. Awesome, well, thanks y'all. - Well thanks, Rach. - I appreciate you coming. (all conversing) Sitting on my couch. - Love it. - All right, that's pretty
great, pretty great. Hope y'all come back again sometime. - Thanks for having us. - Yeah, thank you. (upbeat music)
