Bobby Lee: Comedy, Skyrim, Sex Robots, Love, Fame, and Power | Lex Fridman Podcast #287

if you and I were able to go into Skyrim right and walk around and live together would we make love no no no man don't go there okay no no no because we like girls man the following is a conversation with Bobby Lee a stand-up comedian and podcaster and one of the funniest humans on the planet and just someone who brings joy to my heart with a mix of non-sequitur absurdity Darkness and the singing voice of an Angel in all seriousness Bobby's just a beautiful human being I've been a fan of his for 20 years since this time on Mad TV to today with this podcast tigerbelly that he does with his other half the love of his life kalala and the podcast bad friends that he does with Andrew centino this is the Lux Friedman podcast to support it please check out our sponsors in the description and now dear friends here's Bobby Lee I've been a fan of yours for many many years I think you're one of the funniest people in the world I've been a fan since Matt TV days 20 years ago today with uh with tigerbelly so given that given your status is a world-class comedian how did it feel that you were not invited to Andrew Schultz's wedding and I was well you were there yeah I was there that was the least funny person there yeah and the whole time I was thinking isn't that funny that Bobby Lee's not here yeah um all my life I always felt like people didn't like me and didn't want to invite me to things you know I mean I think that's fundamentally the reason why I do what I do so it really did hurt a lot and I had resentments I did some Revenge fantasies about how I'm gonna get revenge on him and stuff yeah and him specifically him specifically okay like have a big wedding invite everyone you know accept him stuff like that yeah and then just write him a letter like see that's how it feels or whatever but instead of that I'm because I've been therapy and stuff I'm just kind of like trying to let it go what'd you do there this right here why'd you do that I forgot to start the timer and now it starts over yes let's do this let's do it again take two no uh you still feel like an outsider your exceptionally success for me domain you still feel yeah you know I'm doing a Netflix show tonight with Andrew Santino at The Comedy Store and this and that but like last night you know I just felt like I wasn't a part of in fact on stage I go I even mentioned and I go Netflix they don't like me you know what I mean and I just say things like that um they're not true and this is something that I want to correct with myself because I have this internal dialogue that's based on just the past and 99 of the things that go on in my mind aren't true and I'm just at a point in my life where I'm just don't want to start I want to start I don't want to live like that anymore really because I'm the same way I'm deeply self-critical all the time yeah and um that's kind of an engine that drives you to to do stuff yeah but it doesn't give you the kind of Freedom that I would like don't you want to be truly free free from your mind free from negative thoughts no I I'm free part of the day on some of the day I spent being extremely self-critical and that drives you because I'm afraid I'll become Ultra lazy otherwise because I love life I love being comfortable I love just relaxing I need very few things in life and so I'm afraid I'll just get like super lazy oh are you a minimalist yeah so if I went to your house in Austin do you have a couch I recently got this is the first college I've gotten ever because the guests were complaining because I also record uh the podcast there the guests are complaining there's nowhere to sit I have no chairs no couch I sleep on the floor like a mattress is on the floor um not out of principle I think out of some kind of uh minimalist momentum minimalism so we're the opposite in that way then oh so you like stuff I'm not a hoarder but because I can throw things away but I have a shopping addiction I think like when I'm on the road like I was in Oklahoma for two weeks I just I bought a bunch of stuff you know what I mean and then oh my God I went to Todd Snyder and I bought um how about these shoes you know because you know but you're wearing them so they're they're actually you're using them and they're giving value to your life that's awesome yeah but this is the last time I'm gonna wear these unless this is one time this is like a wedding yeah yeah it's a Red Carpet Dress who's the designer do you know I don't know anything what are you wearing Bobby I don't know what I'm wearing but I because I'm on a native show called reservation dogs right I just want to get into the spirit of things that's your yeah this is because if I was ever like native and I was in a tribe back in the day you know what I mean I would have been a gatherer no I'm I'm gonna weave baskets with the ladies yeah I want to pick berries with the ladies you wouldn't be the chieftain no no and I would make after the hunt I would probably make some so some of the guys make love to me oh yeah because I'm kidding up just because you know yeah yeah yeah there's a power heart and you got to know your place in the hierarchy yeah your alpha male then I don't even know what that means Joe Rogan Joe Rogan is the definition of Alpha and to me yeah if I if there was a picture of alpha male in the dictionary yeah yeah yeah so you hoard stuff okay yeah yeah but you can throw it when was the last time let me call you out on that when's the last time you threw away something that's actually valuable valuable like something valuable to you or valuable in general most things that I buy aren't valuable to me there are things that are valuable to me that are like keep stay sakes from my family and stuff that I will keep forever so I like in terms of like an old photo of my father or whatnot so those kind of things I keep but um when it comes to like you know Aviator Nation sweats like if some of like somebody came over to my house and goes hey can I have six of those sweatshirts or whatever I'd be like yeah go take it okay my brother's come over to my house and she's done a clearance you know I mean like I'm gonna take this this is I generally really don't have a problem with this is a self-critical voice is serving no purpose in terms of because you're pretty you know I've I'm a fan of yours so you're known to be a little bit lazy sometimes 100 lazy yeah yeah so the self-critical voice don't you think that it's serving a purpose and fighting off the laziness beating off the laziness the self-critical voice that I have I've been able to come up compartment not how do you say compartment yeah however you say you're free yeah yeah put it in a compartment yeah right and um I'm able to like um I'm a good avoider I'm good at avoidance so for instance right now um to avoid I I've been playing stardew Valley you know what that is no it's a phone game or no it's a um you can play it on your switch but it's on the Xbox and it's a farming simulation game and so I like to farm you know what I mean and so in playing video games and doing stuff like that distracts me from you know what really is going on okay you've mentioned elsewhere in terms of video games Elder Scrolls yeah did you play that yeah of course it's probably my favorite game if I could live in a world you played Morrowind and Skyrim I played Oblivion Oblivion I played a little bit of Morrowind but I didn't like the graphics back then but I really played the can I swear on this podcast yeah I played the out of um Oblivion and Skyrim like eight characters played it all the way through I have to do all the quests that type of thing what's your favorite thing about those games um why did you spend so much time in that world because I I like games that you can grind what do you mean by Grind so like stardew Valley for instance right there's a lot of back to the pharmacy right okay it's the same thing as Skyrim the reason why I like it is that there's a lot of like I have to collect a lot of these things you know I mean I have to just constantly pick things up you know what I mean yeah like for instance in Skyrim there's a mushroom called blister wart mushroom that you can pick and then you can make it into at some sort of formula right yeah potion yeah that potion yep so I would spend like literally human 12 hour days just going to every cave and picking up as much blister wart as I could like that kind of grinding you know what I mean yeah yeah so you're actually the randomly generated quests that these kids do yeah for people like you yeah you don't get bored that's the that's the fun yeah that's the fun for me okay yeah there's always something to do and I find like when when you play a game that's linear like there's certain games where you have to go this way right I don't like games like that yeah I like open world games where I can make choices and I can grind if I want yeah yeah would you stay in that world if you could live in that world in the in the Elder Scrolls world that's how I feel in reality or become like a animated thing in there oh no say like virtual reality we're moving towards that direction oh yeah if you look at Skyrim you mentioned Graphics it's become it's starting to get realistic yeah like I I I'll sometimes just walk around I mean it's been a while but I'll just walk around in Skyrim yeah you can uh there's code you can turn off enemies and you just walk around really you can just listen to music and just walk around that's what you did yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah I would do that wouldn't you do that would you do it with me you sure we would have a house together oh I mean live I thought walk around no no no if you and I were able to go into Skyrim right and walk around and live together would we make love no no no no man don't go there okay no no no because we like girls man yeah that's right it's not gay well you told me it's not gay yeah it's not yeah yeah all right so you and I would yeah I would hunt you would gather but in that world there's no hunting you know but there is hunting I would do have the because we don't just find the bandits we have to fight I'm not gonna gather or abandon I'm gonna we'll hunt them but I think it's all about the potion you don't need the bandits okay well we could do this we could you could be be the guy that like defends our place yeah right I'll gather all the um blister award all the White Caps all the mushrooms I'll get all the food I mean I'll go to White Run remember white run right or Winterhold and I'll do all the like crusts that have nothing to do with you know what I mean so no dragons though no no dragons but we would have a banquet we'd invite the dark dark brotherhood yeah right the Fighters Guild we definitely invite them Mages guilds we'd invite them are you a thief kind of guy I'm a thief guy yeah I'm a bit I'm For Life yeah you've got for life and you still wouldn't invite Andrew Schultz to that no no no but what a piece of though huh because let me just say something okay I just want to get back to that okay okay sure so I met him at the Montreal Comedy Festival and him and I our Kindred uh Souls we we really connected yeah and he did my podcast he's done it several times I've done his we've we've like communicated on the phone this and that and to me and then he invites Whitney Cummings which Whitney is a good friend of mine but what I'm saying is is that I know Andrew as well as Whitney knows him I don't think that Whitney knows them more than I do right what if it was a competition like it was a tie you know and like NBA like a Bobby Lee versus Whitney yeah why in what way do you think she's better in what way do you think you're better I think it's all about gender Optics okay right so it's a comedian he has all these alpha males coming and he's like all right I can I have one more seat left yeah Whitney or Bobby but Bobby is although I don't think there's a lot of Koreans there so he could have used that card this is true right but I think he went for you know Whitney's a woman it's better for Optics okay so she was a diversity higher for the wedding yeah I see it was it was pretty fun it was pretty I have to say I don't is Joe Rogan yeah I know his wife I get it yeah and then uh Whitney oh those are the only comedians that were there I spent the whole time talking to Jose I I think no I don't think there was that many comedians some I'm kind of joking about it was a pretty pretty small wedding yeah what do you talk to Joe about first of all we're both Grapplers so we talk a lot about Jiu Jitsu we talk a lot about I'm a Grappler are you I was on the wrestling team in high school yeah I know I know this is I don't know Jiu Jitsu is there only one kind of grappling that you like yeah there's levels to this game I think oh I just talked out no no there's nothing more yeah there's no that's a surprising fact that you've dropped that it almost feels like a lie because you've said that before that you were a wrestler and yeah in high school it doesn't make sense well it's funny that you say that because and I'm going to call this a little controversy here yeah right but Joe Rogan yes one time came when he lived in La this is years ago and he said you're a liar yeah you've never grappled yep and I go yes I did you're a liar no you didn't and at that time I didn't have any photos to prove it but if you look at my Instagram I have photos of you as a Young Man dressed in a singlet or what on the wrestling team if you go to the sorry if you go to my I'm sorry if you go to my high school yep you're right I was on the wrestling team for three years I'm not gonna go to your high school so is there actual photo evidence of you yeah you know what you're you're being like Rogan right now and I you know it really is how do we know it's not photoshopped oh you can you oh you be the judge then dude okay so this is my brother and me in high school on the wrestling team which oh you were uh I'm the bottom that's my brother to the left I mean yeah to your right oh handsome yeah I'm not that's awesome yeah uh how much do you weigh wow at the time I weighed um I was on the 105 weight category yeah yeah um but so I was also on the tennis team what people don't realize is that I'm very athletic okay yeah yeah and I resent the fact that people that think that I'm not because I'm doughy you're an athlete so uh which is very surprising to me why that uh so I was invited to the wedding yeah yeah I've also been on Joe Rogan's podcast he's a big fan of yours I know I I love Joe no Joe when Jose and I see to the wee hagas now we talked I just talked to him today said I'm talking to you this is hilarious why oh you hug him you just never it just hasn't worked out like I don't like I don't want to go like hey um if because I don't want the rejection so it's like if I go right hey can I do it and he goes I I don't know man I'm busy man you know we got I got a lot I mean maybe later you know I don't want that so if you know if if he said hey are you available Thursday this day fly out do my podcast I would 100 do it and that hasn't happened yet so interesting what why is it interesting I don't know because you're you're like I said you're one of the funniest people in the world that'd be a great conversation it's just funny it hasn't happened yet well it's like this conversation it's like I just learned how to tell time yeah he showed up on time today no digital I know how to write digital obviously but in terms of the hand clock yeah I just learned that six months ago uh how to operate a hand clock to read a can clock hand clock yeah okay not that I I obviously I'll be able to absorb the information I just re I'm one of those guys that just refuse to learn things if I just what did you think it was before I would look at it and I would try to sometimes like if I was at a train station yeah and I would look at those old clogs yeah I would look at it and try to guess and I'd kind of go I think this is the way you know what I mean but like not fully you know I mean really aggressive the way ancient people looked up at the sun to try to tell time you looked at had a clock to try to tell time right like for instance like we don't look at the sun right so it to me it was an obsolete information to me you already had digital yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah and so that's somehow comparable to you going on The Joe Rogan can you because it's like I don't know much about podcasting no podcasting I can but in terms of like the singularity and all that stuff like I I know what it is you know I mean when machines can be have Consciousness when is that gonna happen soon are you afraid of robots see if you were in Austin I would show you some robots oh I'd love to are you afraid of robot no I love it you love robots oh yeah yeah in fact I have this I think to me unless they become hostile and it becomes like the Terminator which I think could happen right there'd be a Skynet we have to bring it down whatever but there's definitely going to be a autonomous weapon system so a lot of the robotics research is being conducted funded by the military wow you know the military industrial complex I know what that is yes yeah so the the a lot of The Cutting Edge research is done is funded by DOD Department of Defense DARPA and so on so a lot of the robots will be used in war but hopefully not most of consumer robotics will be in the home I'm just trying to terrify you no no but can I ask you this though sure what you're saying to me is is that as a layperson is that in my lifetime that machines will have consciousness or that I don't know computers I'm one of the people well depending gear you live dangerously so I don't know how long you're going to live so let's let's put uh but I believe that Consciousness yes could be engineered in a machine uh or at least we can have machines that are human-like and we believe they have consciousness could I ask you one last question about it yes okay but we'll take one more well they have the smoothness of skin and will they look realistic you see I'm one of those people that believes that visual appearance isn't the magic so if you close your if you're blind you can still have a connection with a person um people can fall in love with each other through just letters so yeah I know you're mocking me with your entire energy but yes um yes I believe that part too you're talking about sex bots is what your problem is getting it okay intimacy just friends friends but you wanted you want to feel the smoothness yeah like a guy like you know just go what's up dude yeah just around just hug and yeah like on both cheeks kind of thing I get what you're saying though right obviously there's no soul you're right but you know what I mean and I'm just curious to see you're right I was going with sex spots but yeah have you seen Whitney uh Cummings is robot yeah I've seen it okay yeah how did that make you feel you know she's a beautiful girl I just don't find her attractive the robot or Whitney I find the robot way more attractive yeah if I had the choice robot so you were turned on by the robot see I was surprised by the very thing you're saying which is the realism of the skit like it was quite they did a really good job on that robot oh they did the the life when when it's animated the life is not quite there if you can tell it's a robot but just sitting there still it has a lot of human-like elements the texture I don't know yeah yeah it's quite fast they're getting there they're getting there yeah yeah but the funny thing about sex robots is most people that get sex robots they don't get it for the sex they get it for like intimacy like um not sexual intimacy but like just somebody being there it's the emotional connection not the sexual yeah I mean I you know I I saw a long time ago a um a documentary about real dolls and people marrying them yeah yeah and what I was fascinated about is the cuddling you know what I mean and then watching TV together and stuff like that which I find you know I've just been able to find human girlfriends and stuff so it's really impressive that's one of the reasons thanks man yeah thanks hey speaking of human girlfriends um I'd love your advice in this direction but you're you have an amazing relationship with uh kalila yeah uh so you two are very different so you host the tiger Bella podcast together but there's there's real love there there's a there's a real connection what do you um what do you love most about kalila let's talk about love Bobby Lee yeah yeah I mean that's a really pretty deep I've never really gone down this path um we're gonna walk down that path together holding hands it's one of those things where the first time I met her it was almost as if I had known her all my life it was really weird you know I mean there was a a trust there you know I mean that was just fundamentally there that I could trust her and that I could you know when I look in the mirror and I see all my Character defects and stuff though a lot of those things aren't necessarily things I want to share with people because I don't want to be judged or ridiculed but with her I felt comfortable showing those things and I think she feels the same way about her and then secondly she's funny I mean she made me laugh and and she's hot it's all you know I mean the perfect it was like a perfect combination of things you know I mean she one night we were in bed and I forgot what the joke was but she really made me laugh one night it was she was living in an apartment in Long Beach and I cackled you know what I mean and generally women don't make I mean not women I'm dating Comics do um don't make me cackle in that way and then um thirdly she has um she's partly Asian so it's like you know at one time I dated a white girl yeah and I invited her to Korea Town you're about to be racist a little bit okay yeah yeah and what I love about Asian girls is they'll eat something first and ask what it is after but white girls ask what it is before what is this right but Clio was like would eat the eyeball eat everything go what did I just eat I like that you know what I mean so it's like and it reminds me of my mom in that way in terms of like my mom growing up just scare us and freak us out we'd have a fish and she would eat the eyeball first to see a squirm and as a kid that you thought was gross and weird and this and that but it's like you know when kalila does it it just kind of like I don't know it just makes it makes me feel like at home yeah in a weird way I don't know it's a it's a little Act of fearlessness I like that yeah just put in your mouth and figure it out yeah that's what I like and at the end of the day she also out of all my girlfriends and I this is gonna sound not strange but um hard to admit but my career when I met kalila was in the box I could not get anything going and um this is at the time where Ken Jeong who's a very good friend of mine very talented was getting everything and I just remember going I can't even get an audition like I can't I would go on the road Lex and I would fill half the room I just couldn't sell tickets and when I met her I was just kind of like maybe this is the I had to find love and open up my world in that way and she was the first girlfriend that ever had that looked at me and saw the potential and she said no this is not it doesn't feel right you're so funny and you're so relevant to me and this is what we're gonna do and so she started tigerbelly you know and then um obviously I had a skill set to do it um but once tigerbelly happened and then Andrew was like let's do bad friends and then now things are great you know my career is I'm too busy almost in a weird way you know and I feel like she had a lot to do with like for instance before I met her even if I would get an audition I wouldn't go because I just wouldn't get it in my head I was like I'm not gonna get this I've gone on a thousand of these and they just never hire me but she was so I just didn't go on on them for years and then she was the first girlfriend that said no I don't care if you don't get it right I just want you to be a and I want you to walk through fear and so she would drag me to these things and I for some reason would book them you know what I mean so you know in that we saw the potential of what you could be but she loved you for who you are already yes but also loved you for the potential that you could become yeah and I'm lucky in that way you know so on day one you could show her you said you could show her your flaws to her like you felt like you could be Fragile with her well I accidentally farted yeah or day one on day one yeah you know because I just had I'm a fart machine yeah and I have loose cheeks yeah I like how you work for the listeners he just winked at me yeah I have loose cheeks and um but not in a gay way not in a Gateway no and I um I was wearing a couch and we're talking and I kind of adjusted my body I ripped one by accident as she laughed you know I mean it wasn't embarrassing you know and um let's have a little penis I have a little penis and it's all relative yes it's for little but relative to an elephant everybody's penis is yeah but I'm not an elephant I'm a human you know what I mean so relatively human is it's very small okay and so when she saw it you know I mean I thought she was gonna balk at it yeah right and she looked at it as if it was like an orphan like how you're like I wanna you know it's a lost child and I wanna you know you know take care of it yeah yeah cradle it it'll cradle yeah well you man you you haven't met anybody like that uh never met a girl never seen one of them I hear they're nice winner what are the two of you getting married we don't know yet yeah is that something you would like yeah um this comes up sometimes you know we're in couples counseling we're dealing we're working on some issues that we have sure every relationship even my friendships have issues and so we're working through some issues and once we get to the end of it we'll figure it out would you like to be a father one day foreign you know yeah I do I do because I I feel like um you know before I was very childlike you know I play a lot of video games I'm irresponsible I'm lazy this and that right but you know to be honest with you Lex in the last six months I've really have come through some breakthroughs and um I'm in therapy and I'm doing a lot of things and really self-analyzing myself and my behaviors and what I want my desires and I think ultimately yes I really do because it's a life experience that um you know I don't want to be an old man looking back and going it's something that I've always was interested in and I think it's based on fear because I don't want to um scar my child the way my parents scarred me but at the same time my parents didn't do the work on themselves like I am and they were never about self-improvement they were just about they were immigrants you know and they wanted to put food on the table and um after that they just went about their business and I'm not like that I would never be violent toward my kids like my parents were my dad was very physically abusive you know there was a lot of trauma and stuff and so um you know as a kid I thought you know I just would never put my kid through this so that's why I never wanted it but I would completely do it differently you know um even yelling and and those kind of things I would be very mindful about those things and I think that I have certain things you know I'm not a sciencey guy like you but there are life things that I've learned over the years that I could teach a child you know about living in the moment or walking through fear or you know things that you know things will pass and just different things you know that I could I would be a good listener and um yeah I would like to do that so your um your dad died in um August of 2019. wow yeah you did your research uh yeah it's on your Wikipedia so you said some of it was rough but what's your fondest memory of your dad what do those memories happened later in life um as a child my fondest memory was my mom because he never spent time with us so um my mom made him take me out one day and he took me to a park like he doesn't there's no baseball glove or baseball or anything like that and we sat on a park bench right and we just sat there for hours we didn't talk because he didn't know English that well I didn't know Korean so it's just very you know basic you know information being you know I mean oh you I'm okay you know good good good that type of thing yeah for a long time for a long time and then but the day turned bad because I forgot my jacket there and he yelled at me like there's a bit of a piece together at that time yeah there was peace but then what happened was later in life when I got mad tv and I was doing you know in my early years you know I poked a couple of things like in 2000 I did The Tonight Show on Leno and then I did um I got mad tv in 2000 and um wow that was over 20 years ago and um that's when they my parents kind of went huh you know because obviously you know there's some nepotism in Hollywood right but in my case my parents were straight up immigrants I had no connections to Hollywood and I came up here poor you know with no connections and I built it you know I mean Through The Years you know and in in that way I'm very proud of myself because I went through a lot of hell and sadness and Desperation and all that stuff and I persevered and I did all that on my own man I I booked the Tonight Show on my own I got mad tv on my own and when I did those things my parents were very proud but before that did they doubt you oh yeah you you're not you're not funny you you you never make me laugh yeah right and that kind of stuff yeah you're never gonna make it you know I mean you're gonna be poor all your life you know that kind of stuff but Mad TV he was proud your dad well you know every because it was a weekly show so on Saturday nights they would watch it and I would yeah and and I would I would play characters that they would understand like I did Kim Jong-il at the time yeah right so they loved that right they loved you know the things that I would do the physical comedy yeah and they couldn't believe in their mind you know I mean imagine your parents from Korea coming here you know not knowing the language having a child here right and in their minds that was never like an option right and so when they see their kid I guess on TV especially there was no internet too at the time the internet had just started so to them they were like this is a miracle in fact when I did The Tonight Show my dad called me the next day and asked me um she literally asked me this he goes how much did you pay them to do it he thought that I'd saved all my money like like he thought that like Tom Cruise goes up there and goes here's the Quran thanks for having me on like you don't mean no I go no they asked me like so all the conceptually they were just shocked by it so when I got it and then they were watching me weekly Mad TV The Producers like hey have your dad on so my dad did two or three sketches on television so at that so those memories I also did a pilot for Comedy Central and he was on my pilot uh pilot for like a show yeah show I didn't get picked up but he was on the pilot he was in the show yeah he was in the pilot he was on Mad TV too on television interesting yeah oh wow okay yeah yeah so it's like he he would get residual checks yeah you know what I mean you know let's change everything those uh nepotism in Reverse yeah yeah just have been reversed and so he in those memories are very I have very fond memories because he had changed as well he was no longer that violent kind of guy he had softened a lot you know what I mean but um when he died is when those issues came up you know like a freight train the bad stuff oh yeah and I didn't know what was going on I was it was really hard you miss him how often you think about him every day obviously a lot of it's regrets you know what I mean like what kind of regrets not having said something or um on not having had a conversation it's not regrets because because even if he was still alive they're just things that are impossibilities because of his culture and the way he was raised but my regret in life will always be um having those types of even because I tried I was with my mom um a couple of months ago and um I I looked at her I had tears in my eyes were at a Starbucks I go Mom I just want to let you know that I'm so sorry that you lived in that house and my dad you know and dad hit you and you survived you stayed in the marriage because of us right and you know what a response was let's go to Buca di Beppo she wanted Italian food like it was it's like there was no there was nothing there right and so my regret is is that you know that they just wouldn't they'll never be able to even grasp the concept of that kind of communication you know what I mean and I'll never have it um so that's sad to me you know but there's nothing I can do about it yeah that callus that comes with an immigrant mentality you don't even that emotional connection is not even there I've had um my grandmother yeah she there's something called holiday more which is uh starvation Ukraine in the 1930s that you had to live through she lived through World War II and there's nothing um like the only way you survive that is the callus you bring yeah you can't talk with people that fought in in major Wars they can't they can't yeah can't talk about it my mom when she was 12 years old she walked her little sister my Aunt to school right she forgot a book so my mom goes to my little sister my Aunt stay here I'm gonna greet my book she ran up she came back while she was gone a military truck ran over my aunt and my mom discovered her body split in half in Trails the whole thing and my mom and my uncles had to go and get rice bags to pick up her you know I mean and then bury her my aunt you know when you live through something like that and also the guilt because my mom believes deep down that if she didn't forget that book that her might Aunt would still be alive right so she carries all this guilt and this and to survive all that trauma you have to build a callus back then they didn't have EMDR and therapists and psychologists and any of that right so they had to survive so that's who she is and it's sad to me that you know I mean that it'll forever she'll forever live in that torment [Laughter] um boy what about your own what's uh what's been the darkest place you ever gone in your mind did you wrote that down in my mind in your mind do you ever consider suicide I didn't write that okay have you considered it in the distance yeah I've distantly thought about it um you know about four months ago I was in a really bad place I was naked in a hotel room in Arizona I hadn't eaten in like almost a week I hadn't slept in over a week I haven't you know and I thought I was dying I I was coughing up blood and um I was waiting to go into a outpatient psychologist place you know I mean in Arizona I literally thought I was dying so recently I was in a very dark place how much was that connected to losing your father how much was that connected to uh rehab and that kind of stuff alcohol drugs all the same thing dude it's all the same thing man it's it's um it's all from my childhood right the reason why I do stand up is because of my childhood the hating yourself or like being self-critical that has to do with your childhood yeah so the drugs and drinking is childhood childhood it's all about survival and protecting your heart you know and there are way there are ways that I did that as a kid like um using humor as a defense mechanism um and also avoidance of all emotions you know what I mean because I just want to feel and I'm a the reason why comedy is so good the reason why I was able to survive in comedy is because I can withstand a lot of and pain you know I mean like physic like physical emotional spiritual pain I'm I can absorb it right but now what's happened you know later in life is I'm unwilling to do that I'm unwilling to absorb it I'm willing to carry this weight around with me and um it'll kill me so I am doing everything I can to free myself of all this baggage okay so how you're naked in Arizona in a hotel room face down or face up or on the side or what's your favorite uh when you go to a dark place no the floor on the bed or so what happened shower a fetal position okay I don't lay on my stomach that's weird like like I'm not doing like a downward dog or yoga position or anything like that no I'm like I'm on the bed on the floor yo what happened was so I had to relapse so I was doing drinking all night long what was the first relapse what is the thing the first thing you did just drank what wine you know I took an edible yeah and that opened the door to drinking yeah and the combination is not good for me um and I do the excess of the amount isn't that good for me I just can't stop and I do it 24 hours a day are you alone well no I was living with kalila no I mean at that moment when you do the Edibles I was alone no I took a flight because I was shooting Magnum I'm on a show called Magnum PI so I was flying to Hawaii so I bought Edibles and then on right before I was gonna get on the plane I looked at my girlfriend and said I'm gonna relapse I know so I got on the plane I took it and then literally the last the next three months were like a blur why'd you know well what what gave you the sense that you're gonna relapse there was a couple of things that happened in my life that um were very shocking to me and um I I just and I wasn't going to meetings and I you know it's the same old story you know I was not connected to and my sobriety brothers and sisters and I was drifting away and I um and something in your mind it was just I just the pain was too much so I did it and then so what happened was now two and a half months in three months in I I started coughing up chunks of blood right so I was because I've been a smoker since I was 17 years old right and I was smoking so much weed and cigarettes I would just cough up blood but then simultaneously what happened was Bob Sackett and Louie Anderson died right and that week when I was coughing up blood and because of because I knew them both of them I just in my head going I'm next because to me everything happens in threes you know yeah and I'm like I'm I've had convinced myself that I was gonna die and I was on the precipice of death and so I begged my people to put me into this place in Arizona so because I knew I knew I needed to go to a really rigorous psychology program to get me out of where I wrote what I was going through and also I was getting at that time when I was um in that hotel room I had not drank or even smoked a cigarette or didn't drug in a week I had to wait in La for this bed to open up right so I was coughing up blood I hadn't slept I hadn't eaten right I was sober but you know I was in so much pain and I slept naked by the door of this hotel room because I thought it would be easier for the maid to discover my body I mean that's how up I was I was just in this prison in my mind you know and um I'm much better now can you give some insights to how to get out of that place how you got out of that place I think getting sober first of all was very important but that still didn't do it completely you know what I mean I still was convinced that I was and then going I went to this place and I did you know this place is a 12 hours a day Psychotherapy place where you do 12 hours of you see therapists all day long so it's like a 12 hour long podcast every day yeah yeah but with professionals and and they call you on your and they tell you what's real and they tell you you know I mean you know I'm going also dealing with you know my still my dad still some of these other things that I you know I mean and um and the the third thing that happened was when I got back to LA after that place I I got my lungs checked out and I got my um physical done and you know EKG my heart all of it and I was completely fine you know and I quit smoking I haven't smoked in almost four months I've been drank and done drugs since then too so um you know there's definitely a complete Clarity and I I have to also admit that this time around it's just been completely different is there still in the distance of fear of relapse and all that kind of stuff is that still no so you feel good I feel great yeah I feel better than I've ever felt even when hard happens yeah because it's like I no longer want to be in that place yeah and also on top of it it's like it would be a real shame because I worked so hard to get to this place in my life not just in my career with all of it you know I mean I have so much to lose I have so many people that love me I just don't want to be there again you know let me ask you sorry you've talked about this before but it's interesting let me ask you a question you always wear a suit only for the podcast uh yeah I wear it in private too oh you do not always no because I get recognized unfortunately so you have to be selective about how I wear what you like it when being recognized or no uh so because of podcasting as you probably know uh the people that at least recognize me are happening to be amazing people so like yeah like they there's an immediate connection so there's two things about that I don't like so one of them I fall in love with people and so the nature of interaction is like well it's gonna be short uh so yeah yeah so like you have to say goodbye um and I hate goodbyes you do yeah yeah and then the other thing is just introversion like I just I'm I'm an introvert I'm a I have social anxiety I have um nervous about talking to people and so on so so you have to always I'm walking around always a little bit anxious that there will be an interaction But ultimately once it starts it's fun it's it's beautiful and then the the the the the goodbye is what hurts so both the hello and the goodbyes are first it's the stuff in the middle of this delicious I think there's a beautiful thing though for people like you and I in a weird way you know because um number one I don't know about you but I'm an isolator I don't really like you know any kind of social thing you know um I like my even when I was doing drugs and drinking I never do with people I do it privately in a garage you know and secondly um you know like I was my girlfriend and I went watched the northmen the movie The northmen no what is it does it tell me the plot line you didn't even heard of the Northman I have not heard of the northmen it's Eggers he did uh a movie called The Witch he also did a movie called The Lighthouse you ever see the lighthouse okay you watch movies no you've never seen a movie and I've seen The Godfather yeah I bet you money you've seen Dr Zhivago yes yes yeah like you like historical sweeping yeah Schindler's List yeah yeah yeah yeah if it's not historical or sleeping you know you're not gonna lie all right so um how do I explain it's it's basically a viking movie okay yeah yeah and um scars one of the scars guard I don't know the Skarsgard Brothers isn't it bjork's in it Willem Dafoe Nicole Kidman and Ethan Hawk and it's a you know it's a viking Revenge movie so why does it make you think about isolation no we could know about what I was gonna say is when we went when we went to the movie theater right um afterwards there was a kid sitting next to me and um he just looks at me because he I guess he didn't know I was sitting next to him or whatever and he just went you know hey dude I just can't believe you're sitting next to me you know and you're my hero and um I'm think I'm doing comedy and it's really hard so I was able to give him some encouraging things and because that's who I am too you know I mean I I want to help people and I also um you know the idea that he likes me because he also spat enough specifics about my life about my you know my comedy and this and that so he definitely was a fan and I was able to you know you know I'm not even if I become Joe Rogan famous or that big you know what I mean I've I'm always going to say hi to people I'm always gonna take photos with people I I like that part you know of me it makes me feel also that I belong in a weird way because I felt so invisible before I did comedy yeah I mean I felt invisible and um it puts me in the game of life I think in a weird way you know so I think it's good for you as well yeah it's a little little moment of experiencing love it's like it does feel like celebrating life together you smile at each other and so on although you did say I think in a recent podcast that you know people recognize you but recognize you incorrectly that I don't like that that's the opposite of life okay yeah that that I I don't like uh loved you in The Hangover yeah I mean you know I I you know I or this is what I don't like this is why I hate this yes some guy will like me right I'll take a photo and then other people will go huh he's somebody and will walk up to me and go hey so why did he take a photo you know I want a photo yeah and they're like no I don't do would you do that no I would I don't like that no yeah yeah no but I do like the uh the experience where maybe there's a couple uh a guy and a girl boyfriend girlfriend and the guy is a fan and the girlfriend has no idea and it's always a funny interaction oh yeah yeah yeah because she's like trying to figure out what is happening here yeah and it's always beautiful to see but what if the guy when he the guy explains to to his girlfriend who you are do you feel uncomfortable about that yeah yeah it loads the information is transferred quickly and she starts to understand because she's not used to her boyfriend being excited about a stranger yeah like what what's happening here so it's a fascinating little Dynamic that's a beautiful it's like uh the spread of information happens right there in real life it's beautiful it's mostly though do you would you say that probably usually men that recognize you or no but men the thing I've discovered is men are more likely to approach aggressively right uh women recognize you they have a different way of like double take uh they don't want to uh invade your space guys are like bro yeah yeah they come in with a hug I had uh uh South by Southwest had a guy um I was just walking until summer I go to stuff and I have a lot my favorite spot Gadget 7-Eleven yes uh sugar-free slushy I think for happiness I like I find happiness at 7-Eleven so adorable late late at night and he came up and you know what can I tell you something that happened to me I I haven't told anybody this never happened to me before I was outside of a 7-Eleven in Austin I'm not gonna say which one and there was a gentleman that approached me this is at three or four at night which is usually when I go I program all night and I just like to go and take a break he approached me in a way that maybe somebody who recognized me approached me he did a double take he walked past me and then walked back and then looked at me and I went into the 7-Eleven I thought that's weird uh and then I I came out with my slushie and and then he approached me and he said can I give you a laughs so I have no no really yeah so the energy he put I've never had were you wearing a suit no okay I was wearing like uh uh the sweatpants and it was very kind of like hiding from the world yeah yeah uh type of thing I've never had anybody approach me that but the energy he put the love he had in the approach I thought he would be like um love you on Rogan yeah something like love some kind of and then he just said can I I'm forgetting the exact wording because it wasn't uh the the wording was such that he wasn't he wanted to make me happy ah he didn't want to make himself have you want to make me happy well when I forgot can I give you a I think that was the thing because if you said can you give me a it would be it would be very difficult yeah yeah yeah no but I think there's more aggressive way of phrasing that but he he presented himself see I forget because it was almost like gentle and poetic and I was like I I just started and said no no thank you move past that's what everyone does yeah no thank you no no no no no no no no thank you in my mind I was like is this a threat because it's fortnite uh I wasn't exactly sure I mean I've never experienced this I imagine this is what sort of um women often experience the kind of the danger the constant threats all around you but I've never this just it was uh it was a funny little moment I I didn't know what to do with it yeah that happened and I I go to that 7-Eleven often looking for the guy because now all right now I would say yes no there used to be a steam room in Beverly on Beverly Boulevard and um my brother and I walked in there once and I and we walked in and was a man sitting there erection and his dick was so big he was jerking it off with both hands and we kind of walked in and he goes what's up and he just did it and we just sat there you know I mean because it was not aggressive yeah yeah yeah and maybe that was the same fail you sense that it wasn't an aggressive thing yeah it wasn't yeah yeah it was just a kind it was he was just minding his own business and he threw it out but it wasn't also it wasn't sexual either it was like it was like it's just you know it's just like it's like love or something yeah I felt like he it's almost like can I give you a hug right then why just take it I I keep looking for it next time I see it it's not in a gay one yeah yeah yeah yeah I just want to be clear while you grew up in Russia or Ukraine uh Russia or Russia yeah but your great-grandmother or grandmother was in my father's Ukrainian my grandmother is Ukrainian so if you just look at the full family tree he's about half and half as Russia a lot of conflict with you right now the internally yeah yeah yeah let me uh let me ask you've talked about this before but I'd love to sort of re-explore this as Carlos Mencia oh my God yeah why why go there again yeah I'm willing to do it but do you like Carlos well first of all I'm friends with Joe and I remember being a fan of I'm outside this whole world I remember thinking Carlos was funny yeah so it's just as a fan I was like oh funny and then uh I remember this this all this big controversy uh about him stealing jokes and because I'm a fan of yours it's such an interesting human Dynamic and I'm a fan of friendship and loyalty and you had a great podcast conversation with him it was tense it was so tense it was very tense yeah but it was interesting and it it kind of well it makes me think of you talking to your father on that bench yeah that's essentially what it was um some of it wasn't getting through but maybe uh how do you feel about that uh whole thing about the guy I mean he gave you he's a friend he gave you a lot um but you're you're also comedians stealing jokes is no good but also there's like a I don't know all the tensions in your heart about all that whole thing how do you feel about it do you forgive them okay let's just let's go back to the it's very Shakespearean in a very weird way why because there's some betrayal there you know I mean there's a lot of drama when it comes to that situation um again also I'm a very loyal guy like I've had the same manager since um in the late 90s and I've had every gigantic manager want to sign me even though my manager is great right she's not a big company right and there's only so much she can do and maybe you know I mean my career would have been different if I would have signed with a bigger management I don't know right but I will never leave her you know um I'll never leave my agent Matt you know the people go well you're at CAA that's amazing the only reason why I'm at CA is because of map lake you know so there are certain loyalties that I have The Comedy Store you know I mean I generally play The Comedy Store mostly because my loyalties are with them I don't know if that's a good trade but it's just the way I am right I admire that yeah okay so when it comes to Carlos you know in the early in the mid 90s is when I met him I was a doorman at the lawyer Comedy Store he brought me on the road he introduced me to map like my agent right and he bought me a car you know um when I couldn't pay rent you know and I was really desperate I could always go to him for money you know and he helped me out in so many different ways right so in you know I really appreciate that Paulie did the same thing um anyway um and then all of a sudden and I always knew going on the road with him that number one I found it odd that he never had a notebook you know usually you know Comics riff with each other and they write things down you know what I mean me I'll get together with people and write you know I mean I'll do a new joke night because I'm too scared to try it in front of a pack girl or whatever it might be okay he never had did that right and he had hours of material and you know a lot of it was derivative of other people's um he would sometimes hear a bit change it to Mexican like for instance if you know if Paul Mooney had a joke about black people he would change it change it a bit but promise wise it was always extremely too similar and there were examples on the internet so you know you can there's things that you can't really deny and so when that when that whole thing happened um you know it was like the Titanic I mean I was either gonna sink with Carlos or survive and I did the worst not the worst thing but I I made a difficult decision and my decision was to cut ties and you know over the years I've have felt very guilty about it in in some respects but um you know there is always in my mind I want to help him you know I want to help him reestablish some sort of a different you know route for him to go in terms of his career and whatnot and so I had him on my podcast and it didn't go the way I wanted it to go you know I mean I've always believed if he just fully just was apologetic and said you know I'm sorry for stealing in general because we don't know specifically I mean there's specifics you know I mean and I don't want to argue every case you know so I thought the healthiest thing to do was like in just in a broad way listen I stole I'm so sorry these are the reasons why and I'm a different guy now but it just never happened in that way and so it's been difficult so you you don't think he self-reflected looking in the mirror about mistakes of the past at all like do you think he's aware I think it's ego you know I think that he for one reason or another he um because there are probably jokes that he literally legitimately in his heart know that he wrote that people are accusing of stealing right yeah but you know it's like we don't know right so it's like just apologize for all of it right but he won't he fights for every you know every point and you know I just think that that's not the route and he I mean he's always going to make money he's you know he's never going to be what he should be which is he's a powerful performer you know in terms of laughs I mean dude I wouldn't I wouldn't want to follow him he's a Crusher you know so it's like you know it's really he can act he has all the skill sets it's just that to me he went about it in the wrong way and it's sad to me and uh but I still always love him and I've always will thank him for all the help that he's done so he's still got room in your heart for Him I have room for my heart for a lot of people man you know Hitler all right what was the returning back to tigerbelly because you said uh kalala basically started it what's the origin story of tigerbelly you know when I met her oh by the way for people listening in case you somehow don't know what type of belly is the podcast you do it's an amazing podcast you'll also do uh bad friends with uh and Justin Tino yeah so on thank you so much for the plug appreciate it I don't know it's contact it's not the plug can I plug other things though what's since we're doing it uh sure sure oh yes you're uh I'm on a show called okay that's enough thank you so um yeah I'm on reservation dogs it's an fx show wait Sex In The City is not a joke no I am actually on sex and City what are they rebooting the show they did okay and just like that Sex in the City oh and you're on it yeah is this not is this is not a joke you could Google it okay you know what I mean who do you play I play a podcaster on it on the show Sarah Jessica Parker's Carrie has a podcast and I'm her podcast partner oh got it perfect but then but I'm also now they've my storyline anyway it's fine do you sleep with somebody on there I am married on the show yeah they showed my I married to a young lady on it yeah all right it felt like it felt like it you know because you don't think doing it I look around going are you sure I'm supposed to be on this you know what I mean I do feel that but lo and behold I'm on it yeah you are so um I started this way so you know my friend David Cho do you know him he's an artist he used to have a podcast right called dvdasa and um he used to have me on it and then kalila started doing it and then when dvdsa ended kalila was just like let's start our own and I was like nah it's not gonna work so she goes well fine I'm gonna just do it on my own then so she went and bought the equipment and we were living in a condo at the time in Hollywood and she um would do them on her own she did probably three on her own and one day I was watching television the door was open to the podcast room and I looked turned around and she was literally like this did she we had a table like this we had she had the mic and all that stuff and she was doing this she was like slumped over like this and I just kind of want to ing so I walked in there I go all right let's just do one yeah and that was that's how it started and then chemistry was there immediately well I already knew that she could do it because of dvdsa right so I already knew that she had the skill set it's you know you know it's just all about even in this conversation that you and I had today right there are gaps of like oh what else should we talk about right yeah right or like I don't know what direction right and it's all about the old improv rule adding information even if you don't know what you're gonna say just fill the dead space with something like so if right now if we had some stuff we stopped talking about something I was like like when I asked you did you grow up in Russia or Ukraine right was one of those dead spaces where I was just like let's just throw it out there and see where this goes right and she has that ability to fill that dead space with information that's all you need right and um she gets it in that way so it's like when we um you know started doing it at dvdsa I just knew that she had the skill set so when we started doing a photography it was a given you know you know she can do it there I've had girlfriends that wouldn't be able to do it what what are you doing you know you have the skill set you know you're a sciency guy you spent all night long you know I mean you know I mean you know doing whatever you're doing right but you have this innate ability to do it right and I think it's a talent do you think it's a talent no do you think it's do you think you have talent what are you doing I know what you're doing not even adding information I know what you're doing that's a good pit it's a good thing I kept doing it and you kept filling the space it's quite interesting yeah that is true huh because you're yes ending yourself which is great The Improv thing that was really impressive can I ask you a question sure have you ever had a guest on that didn't add information and then you had to keep doing it yeah yeah but it's part of the magic too and sometimes I feel like uh they were actually giving me a gift of silence and I was stepping on it like for example I had a conversation with Jocko you know uh Jocko willink and every question I would ask him in the beginning and I'm now better friends with him it was the first time we met in that conversation and I would ask them these long questions of Mumble and Meander and so on and he would answer with yes or no and that's it yeah and then but he'd do it in a strong like viking-like way and I kept I kept uh trying to go full like uh Bobby Lee style of create chaos and just keep talking and talking and so on as opposed to I think he was inviting me more for the stoic type of Silence short sentences that kind of conversation so I that up I believe uh but yeah there's uh the not the adding information part but the add-in chemistry part or something it's usually ego or where people don't realize there's a magic to be found between two humans like genuine it's like a first date like that to truly listen to each other and to do the yes and thing and have fun with it when you have this energy I'm way too important for this conversation that the yeah the information might be there but the chemistry is not so you have to remember that a lot of the podcasts I've done are like technical yeah and so you could still say a lot of stuff about like what what this project or whether it's physics or robotics or biology you could say informational stuff but the the excitement the magic is not there but I often blame myself because like if I'm excited they'll be excited I've learned this so I'm learning I'm not allowed to have like a uh board face which my my face is naturally looks bored but on the inside I'm excited yeah it might be a Russian thing I don't know it's not can I tell you why you're not boring your face all right because um you have crow's feet oh this thing yeah is that what the thing yeah and the reason why you have crow's feet is you smile a lot yeah yeah you're very expressive I know white dudes I don't trust white dudes yeah right with no crow's feet right because that means they don't they're not you know I mean accessing that part of their you know I mean face yeah you know which is why I hate when um this isn't a lay thing especially uh women have talked to me about like botox and they they hate the crow they they hate not not me on themselves oh and they they hate because it's all wrinkles and stuff like that and to me it's like no that's where the that's the magic that's the magic it really is yeah uh so okay so the interesting thing about tigerbelly is there some weird like aesthetic to it it's really unique it's not just good it's also unique like in the way that Wes Anderson films a unique like Life Aquatic I don't know if you know those films yeah I love those I mean those are my favorite films yeah what is that what is that it it's not just the chemistry between you and koala it's like what is that can you can you put a finger on it or is it just like well it's it's essentially who I am I like I that's what my all my houses have looked like that you know what I mean like I've always been a collector of designer toys yeah you know I mean I've always been a collector of um kind of weird artwork um yeah I've always been like that you know I I like weird wallpaper like I'll get instead of like going to a wallpaper store what I'll do is I'll get artwork that I like from an artist like and go get the you know get their approval and go to a place and make wallpaper out of their artwork you know what I mean you can like if I wanted a Lex Friedman your face on my wall I would ask for your permission and I would probably put your face on a gigantic wall like I would do stuff like that that's awesome yeah but can you do that yeah you have my permission you know I think I will yeah you know I think I will do the laugh yeah yeah I mean but I would do it big please yeah yeah yeah yeah but my point is is that I um yeah it's essentially who I am on the inside I guess in terms of like my you know I don't know but I don't really I've never I'm glad you said that because I never even thought about that yeah he's just you know you just kind of do it like this you know because all your podcasts have this black ominous thing yeah you're you know you're wearing a black suit you're you have a specific thing too it's like but I don't I don't really think people ask me like why do you wear a suit I really don't I just feel good in it yeah just who I am and the reason why my podcast looks the way I do is because I feel comfortable in that environment and it you know like you I don't try to think too much about what I'm doing on tiger belly or even bad friends right because when you start thinking about it and going we should do this segment and I should you know do it this way or this podcast does it this way so why you know no I just show up I keep my mind open and I do the best I can I add information like we talked about and I just keep talking right and I'm being I try to be authentically myself like right now you know I had this fear when I was I was far I in your bathroom man yeah because I was so scared out of fear yeah yeah and like you know I was like kind of nervous because I you know there's a whole week and it was anticipating coming here yeah and I watched the mark Normand one I watched the Giannis one to see you know how tonally and last night my girlfriend just looked at me just goes just show up yeah Carla knows about who I am dude you think that first of all let me ask you something yes you think I have the day you know busy I'm to drive all the way over here to West Hollywood yeah to do your thing why would I do that yeah because we are well aware of who you are and we like you thank you God and we want you on ours I would love that I would love that as a I mean that's that's that's the reason I'm doing this is just to get on your pocket you're gonna get on it awesome uh yeah it's funny because I just mentioned to you uh offline I get a chance to talk to Oliver Stone and he asked me this thing which is you know how many um listeners does this thing get all that kind of stuff and I don't even pay attention to that so it's like I just don't a little bit though you do don't ever extensions in my browsers where I don't see the views the number of views really yeah did you know that like some of your YouTube videos on interviews and stuff have over a million that I know I know I know like Loosely that like it bleeds through but it's it's not part of my conscious like um thing I think about I'm very I've just seen it destroy people's minds where they're no longer thinking creatively they're not they uh don't feel good if something they do doesn't get as much as attention as they thought it should it can destroy you even though it's good it could be great stuff you create that nobody everybody ignores but it was still great it is it is still great and uh sort of letting that negatively affect your mind as a I don't know I've seen it destroy people so I'm very nervous about that it's like that old saying never live in the results it's like if I if I podcast to make I'd like initially honestly when I did Tiger ballet we made no money for the first couple of years wow let me like like not enough to put a dent I couldn't buy anything like you know nice or anything um it was um side money you know I mean I could buy some shoes once a month or whatever right and like I said before um I was my career was in the right so tiger belly wasn't like this is going to be the thing you know I mean it was just something to do with my girlfriend creatively you know and it just so happens that it did do all these things for me right um podcasting but um yeah I never and still today I don't do it for any of those things you know I do it because um it's fun yeah yeah it is right yeah yeah uh let me ask you since you say why you love kalila why do you love slash hey George Kimmel your uh producer what's your favorite thing about him let's say that positive thing positive some compliments but you know I'll try yeah yeah I'll try um have you actually I don't think you've publicly ever said anything I don't think I have either so I'm gonna get I'm gonna give it a go I'm gonna give it a gorilla go here okay yeah okay you know at the end of the day when it comes to money when it comes to responsibility you know obviously this is a business now for you and me it is you know it's it's a side business but it's a business and um you want to be able to trust the people that are running it and I have 100 trust in everything that he does in terms of financial things in terms of technical things in terms of all of it you know I mean merchandise and I have 100 um belief in him I and that's rare you know to find someone like that um also at the end of the day I know his heart and he really is a great guy he there's nothing about him like for instance you know he was over the other day and I go you know I bought this Keith wooden thing that some native man made and I don't know how to put it on the wall so I just you know I go hey can you figure this out and he goes yeah I got it you know what I mean like he's just that guy yeah you know um he's also but but there is a part of me and this is probably wrong yeah but there's a part of me that feels like I kind of made him yeah he would be nothing without you no that's not what it's saying well I just said that's the way I heard it that's what I meant okay but that's not what you said it's probably wrong right because he did all the things that he has in his life he did on his own right right but still for some reason he'd be nothing without you that's what I'm saying but that's what I mean yeah okay yeah so basically like because when I met him I was a part of this um YouTube studio called Maker Studios and he was just a producer there and that's how I met him and when he left maker he came to us and he wasn't a podcast producer and now he has this big company he produces a bunch of podcasts you know and he has a bunch of employees and he has a nice business you know and I feel like I had a lot to do with it so both the competence and the good heart yeah what about Gilbert yeah Gilbert is a godsend as well you know I I don't know if you because of let me ask you this because you're a Science Guy this is an interesting question for me um do you believe just the universe gives you certain things at the right moment at the right time do you believe that there is a mechanism out there where it's just we're just a part of this machine that's kind of like almost as if things are just happening the way it's supposed to happen or do you think there's this random things that are hap occurring and we're just it's chaos in that way but I don't know from a science perspective because I wouldn't be able to explain it but I do believe you mentioned Karma there's there's a Karma thing it just if you put love out there in the world like certain doors open in a certain kind of way like they're almost waiting for you and then you walk through them so yes in that way I believe it just it feels like um not everything is like a basic like billiard ball model of like you have to fight for everything you could just generally be cool to people and kind to people and certain opportunities just pop up at the right moment but more specifically though you know so for instance let's suppose like Gilbert for instance he just showed up at my house one day I didn't know who he was I had a fight night and a friend brought him right this is right when kalila and I were starting tiger ballet right and in conversation he was like we didn't know how to do engineer we didn't have an engineer for our podcast and that night he was that you know I know how to do it right and if I hadn't met him that night he just wouldn't I don't know if it would be as good it would be completely different and I really believe that we just Abe we were met we met him that night for a reason you know so you don't believe that it's complicated I believe that for love and these kinds of things but I don't believe that as much for building a team but that's the engineering thing I think that's the the artist in you I'm less of an artist I think artists thrive in the chaos of it so it's not only that you guys met at that time is you didn't probably ask in detail about his qualifications or didn't didn't go through a rigorous thing you just dove in and figure it out on the Fly I think that's that's sort of the artist I think I think with like if you're doing a startup or engineering there's a little bit more rigor in the selection process um because the same with with Rogan Jamie just walked up to him uh Jamie Vernon yeah yeah he just walked up in the same kind of situation and they made it you know uh both both of you have one of the best podcasts in the world and so it's like how did that what yeah I I so I believe it's very strange yeah strange yeah maybe it's just like cool people hang out with cool people so you kind of collide that's not true because they're because that's not true because with bad friends for instance right um I've had 12 people before Andrew Santino that asked me to do one with me yeah right and you know they just was it wasn't didn't want to do it yeah you know um with Andrew though it happened kind of organically and in in a way that was almost like in my heart meant to happen in a weird way that's a weird combination by the way so why did why was that the sticky one because you have a lot of comedian friends why Andrew because number one we both know just instinctually without even talking about it that in many ways we're Polar Opposites in terms of like energy right he's more aggressive I also know I respond good with alpha males you know I mean because I'm more of a follower you know what I mean or sensitive in that way but in in many ways I am an alpha male in certain areas of my life you know yeah you know when it comes to Smashing dot what's up yeah you know so we both knew instinctually that that in that way our chemistry worked right and also in terms of style and all that stuff is completely just it was just an organic given to us yeah yeah but you trust yourself with power you play dictators what do you mean do I like because I feel like you would be because you said you're not an alpha male but in many ways um when you smash what's up and you winked at me would you uh what do you think about that if I give you absolute power would you be able to uh what would you change what does absolute power mean like you said to me listen you're gonna be the dictator of planet Earth and anything that you want is at your means including violence sex no I would not because even in my personal life now there are things that I could do right that I have power I guess that I don't participate in right so why would I do it if I had ultimate power I mean because there's always there's still a moral and ethics that I have right that I don't feel comfortable with right so you wouldn't even enjoy it no I mean I think that um there would be no if I had ultimate dictatorship on planet Earth there would be no violence I mean I would not cause any wars right but if there's an uprising yeah I'd have to quell it that's how it starts Bobby you call it don't surprise right but so first you're gonna censor everybody who wants to even suggest the idea of Uprising and then and then one person gets out of line they run a red light okay that's that's but if you ever get angry in traffic yeah I get raidful so if you could murder that person no no no no no nobody has to know no I would give them cancer I would not okay no but no but here no this is interesting thing because I want I want to elaborate all right so the thing if I was the dictator of the planet earth right um there would be a reason why people would uprise right so give me a reason because I would give them food shelter right and all the things I feel like that that people would desire right but but you're right but you're right because they're you're right I think this is what you're talking about yeah so here's the deal so there are certain things that I do believe in right like for instance it's a very controversial thing right in terms of a woman's right right in terms of abortion right I feel like as a male I it's not my body so I don't really even have an opinion and I shouldn't even have a voice on it because you know I mean a woman like it's like if they created laws if white people men created laws for Koreans in America like you don't have the right to right so it's like so if I was if I was a dictator right I would just be like yeah women have all the rights in the world right and they you know and I think abortion should be legal throughout the planet earth right but there will be people out there that will believe that no you know what I mean we you know we're pro-life so you would put them in jail so that's right so I think as a dictator you there was no way to be able to please everyone so there will be an uprising yeah so yeah it I don't want to do it okay would you do it uh not no there's several loaded questions would I enjoy it no what I uh do it no because I don't trust my own mind under power like I'm well aware that uh in situations where I have control it's it's as much of Freedom as it is a burden like it can change you I'm very nervous about that interesting like how much uh uh how much the ego starts to flare up how much just like the less uh Pleasant things about your nature come up you know I have a temper too like I have all that kind of stuff and uh you have I'm sure you have a bit of a temper yeah I have a temper yeah and so whenever nobody is able to as clearly call you out on your that's that could be a problem do you have this when you you when you rage out you have a temper is there like like either a day later or a couple hours later is there a shame and regret that comes along with that or no yeah no no no of course yeah during it yeah during it too yeah shame and regret yeah yeah and then but I try to make sure it's like love and respect are felt always underneath the whole thing um but still it's like human emotion you can't control it and if you give an absolute power you start to lose your sense of the world you start to be unable to see what is right and wrong you think everybody everything is right you start to be um have a distorted view of who is doing the wrong things in the world and then also distrust well that has to do more with how absolute Powers usually attained because when you're in the seat of power everybody first on the outside but then in your inner circle you start to distrust them you start to believe that they're going to they want your power so the people you love the people that were source of so much Beauty for you previously uh like even like your girlfriend wife your closest lifelong friends you start to suspect them I don't want to live like that yeah yeah and you're often right to suspect them so because you think they change a little bit too they change too yeah they start a little bit taste of that power yeah it's the interesting thing is a bunch of people in the in Hitler's Inner Circle at the very end betrayed him to in in search of their own power wow fascinating it's fascinating this power thing uh let me ask you a bunch of ridiculous questions real quick okay if you can be someone else for a day someone alive today who you haven't yet met who would you be for one day you get to be it could be female male they have to be a lot I've always wanted to see what a pop star was like which one would you like Harry Styles okay yeah yeah so if I'm Harry Styles right I just want to see like wouldn't like to go to the Beverly Center okay that's Harry Styles ask yourself yeah or Coachella just walk around Coachella as Harry Styles you know what I mean we get a lot of attention and it's a very specific kind of attention yeah I just want to see what that's like I want to be able to because the thing is is that I want to be able to like see what it's like um in terms of how easy would it be to get a hot chick I thought you meant to like get a table at a restaurant no no no that you know you I can still do now as Bobby Lee you know and but as Harry Styles or I want to see what it'd be like and how that would go about like how easy it would be you know what I mean yeah yeah uh okay like could you just walk up to the hottest chick at a Coachella and start making out with them yeah that's interesting just to see just to see yeah yeah because I know as Bobby Lee no no no no no could you no you couldn't do that no no uh that's interesting reason yeah so if you were the last person on earth like everybody disappeared everybody's dead uh what would your day look like what would your days look like what would you do that's interesting because if I was able to figure out the you know electricity right I think my days would be like why didn't you learn about electricity oh yeah right you realize how little you know yeah yeah why did you learn about these things because now you're gonna die yeah right yeah but I think the first thing obviously is now let me ask you something why now if you're saying that um I'm the last person on planet Earth because there was an alien invasion and there's predators and things that I have to look out for that's one way but if I'm just all of a sudden I wake up and just everyone's gone and everyone's dead everyone's dead but there's no threat there's no threat then what I would do is I go well let's find a place to live not probably my house right so I probably live in a place where that's closest to grocery stores right so I would get food and stuff first right and then secondly it's like you know I'll probably go you know what I've thought about I would probably go to um San Marcos San Diego Vista because that's where the real doll factory is they just all of them no no I would have to grab like six of them because I'm gonna get lonely six of them for a variety you wouldn't be monogamous with one doll no and no and I also would carry out like the the you know the vagina parts you know what I mean and all the accessories and stuff right and then go back to LA probably oh man why would I stay down there you can stay in the factory no yeah maybe it's that Factory and then um but I think thirdly I would run out of electricity right and I think you know I mean My Demise would come slow well you could find sources of electricity because nobody's using it so I don't know how to turn the machines on like I don't know how to go to the um yeah what do you what do you call it the place where it's I don't even know what it's called the place would you know me where it all the the energy is generated yeah the generators like yeah where do I go yeah it's a good question okay all right would you rather lose all your old memories or never be able to make new ones the past or the future no I mean I can't lose my memories all of them that makes me who I am but you wouldn't be able to make new ones you wouldn't be so you'll be living in the moment non-stop with all the all the but you did say you're in a really good place so maybe this is a pretty good set of memories you got you got all the questions yeah I mean you just that's a nightmare you just created a nightmare for me that's a nightmare the choice the choice is a nightmare yeah you're either way it's already beautiful it's a kind of death not being able to make new memories that's it that's all you got yeah you get to relive the memories you have as a science guy let me ask you a question sure are you afraid to die yeah of course I'm I'm not of course I am I think about it every day yeah I yeah I meditate I'm more on my mortality all the time right it doesn't make any sense it's terrifying it's terrifying and because are you terrified because of the unknown or because you believe it's nothingness the unknown but my best guess is that it's something like nothingness and that nothingness is so terrifying yeah the Infinity of the nothingness yeah yeah but ramdas says and this is something that I always you know ramdas yeah ramdas says he believed that death is like removing a tight shoe like release yeah that could be it too I think maybe when we die that's initially maybe the last feeling that we have is release and then if that happens and there's nothingness I think that's cool well no that that has to do more with the actual feeling of death which I think some people are afraid of the experience to make sure it's it's a it's a it's one of release like you said yeah but the existential aspect that you're no longer exist like all the you're doing kind of assumes you'll live forever right like you don't really con like all the your career and all that kind of stuff you probably will be forgotten I know like completely erased yeah so all you have is a few moments in this life a few moments of Joy a few moments of trauma of suffering and that's it I know but here's the thing and you're wasting your time today talking to me and then you have you have a few such moments you know do a couple hundred more podcasts and then you'll be dead no because this right here dude right is human number one I walk through a little fear today so I learned something yes right I'm talking to a science guy which I never thought I could you're the first scientist I've ever talk to yeah right you get a diploma at the end of this oh good and there's I I believe that there was a connection right not in a gay way not a gay way none gay connection right um in certain circumstances I probably would blow you would you in a certain circumstances like if we're the last two people on the planet Earth and stuff like that sure yeah yeah but yeah those are probably the only ones but uh or like somebody put a gun to my eyes you gotta blow Lex okay yeah yeah yeah I'm turned on right now yeah let me ask you one more one question go ahead what do you think is the meaning of life my that's the last one yes this is the last one yeah yeah what do you think why are we here why are you here why are we here does any of it make sense I I think ultimately here's the what's why I like life in general is what we talked about like we view death there is a mystery there is a wonderment to it right so it's like when I walk outside you know and I look at the trees and I look at buildings that man made these buildings and you know I look at the universe and I look in the sky and I don't really completely comprehend what's going on right it's just so in I'm in awe of all of it right and I don't have any answers right but that I think is what the meaning of life is is to be in awe of it and The Wonder of it all and it's just amazing yeah just open your eyes to the Wander of it yeah while we're still here yeah Bobby uh it's a huge honor to finally meet you I've been a fan for many many years um it's an honor that you would even consider blowing me in the correct kind of circumstances I think you would blow me in the right circumstances I think that's the definition of Love Bobby thanks so much thank you so much thanks for listening to this conversation with Bobby Lee to support this podcast please check out our sponsors in the description and now let me leave you with some words from Kurt Vonnegut laughter and tears of both responses to frustration and exhaustion I myself prefer to laugh since there's less cleaning to do afterward thank you for listening and hope to see you next time

Channel: Lex Fridman

Views: 1,113,379

Keywords: agi, ai, ai podcast, artificial intelligence, artificial intelligence podcast, bad friends, bobby lee, carlos mencia, comedy, khalyla kuhn, lex ai, lex fridman, lex jre, lex mit, lex podcast, mit ai, skyrim, stand up, stardew valley, tigerbelly

Id: tOTenjh_8hw

Length: 99min 9sec (5949 seconds)

Published: Fri May 20 2022

Reddit Comments

[u/Flyingpig12]

The way lex is able to get Bobby talking about his parents’ upbringing and how he was raised in such a reflective manner, only for the conversation to then be broken by laughter at 37:50 was kind of beautiful to listen to.

[u/RedAfroNinja]

Learned some of the most about Lex in this one too. Always love the chemistry Lex seems to have with comedians.

[u/clingklop]

oh my nosotros

[u/Tacos_Royale]

This was a great episode. Someone needs to draw Bobby & Lex hand in hand inside Skyrim

[u/lilstar263]

Lex, please consider having David Choe as well.

[u/Zalivalalus]

Thanks for this one Lex.

[u/RIAPOSW]

Lex could legit be a comedian he has nice quick jokes and lets it rip sometimes, not holding back on the material. Sometimes it feels he wants to go deeper with the joke. Could be years of online memery/trolling type style but not in a malicious way of course.

[u/can_i_improve_myself]

Whaaaatt yessss!!!!!!

[u/jsouliya]

What the?! Hell yeah! Lol