- [Babish] This episode
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80 million and counting. - Pretty Patties! Available
in six designer colors. (Mr. Krabs laughs) - Mr. Squidward, come look! Don't that look appetizing? - [Squidward] Mm, mm, good, sir! (Mr. Krabs and Squidward laughing) - Wait, give me an orange
patty with extra purple. (Squidward laughs) - [Babish] Hey, what's up, guys? Welcome back to "Binging With Babish." For this week, we're finally taking a
look at Pretty Patties. Now, the late great Stephen Hillenburg, creator of SpongeBob, specified that Krabby
Patties are meatless. So, as you can see, I have the entire vegetable
kingdom strewn before me, but before we can make any pastel patties, we have to make some brilliant buns. Now, my first instinct was to recreate the brightly colored,
barely browning bread from the Broodwich episode. Now, not only did the egg wash used to adhere the sesame seeds to the bun cause the bun to brown,
but, late that night, I awoke in a cold sweat, remembering that eggs are not vegan, and on the off chance
that's what he meant, I decided to start over with
a lean burger bun dough. We're starting with 510 grams of bread flour in a large bowl, to which we're going to add
10 grams of instant yeast, 30 grams of sugar, and two teaspoons of kosher salt that we're going to
regular-size whisk together to make sure that everything
is evenly distributed throughout the flour before
adding 275 mil of water and 60 mil of neutral-flavored
oil like vegetable or canola, mixing together at first
by spatula and then by hand until combined into a
shaggy yet homogenous dough. Normally, we would now want to knead this within an inch of its life until it passes the window pane test, but since we have to
make six different colors and I don't wanna make six
different batches of dough, I am weighing and dividing this
dough into six equal pieces, working with one at a time
and keeping the rest covered. First, I'm gonna break it in half, place it in the jar of the food processor, ready the food coloring of my choice, and then, with the food processor running, slowly drizzling a small amount of color down through the feed tube. Then letting the dough process
for about 45 seconds total, both evenly distributing the
color throughout the dough and helping to develop gluten. Use the dough as a sort of
sponge to pick up all the scraps, give it a sort of gestural needing, and place it in a covered oiled bowl until nearly doubled in size. Then we're gonna rinse and
repeat with the remaining doughs. Orange, red, indigo, violet, and good old-fashioned green. Once everybody's well-kneaded and tinted, it's time to let 'em rise. Cover everybody with plastic wrap and allow to bulk ferment
at room temperature for one to two hours
until visibly embiggened by anywhere from 50 to 100%. Next up, shaping. Go ahead and dig out the
first color of your choice. I'm going with orange. Weigh it and divide that
number precisely in half, because each of these mini batches is going to yield two
extra-large slider buns, which I realize is an oxymoron. Go ahead and roll each portion into a nice, smooth, taut ball, lightly pressing down each to make sure that they
don't end up too vertical, and arranging with plenty of space on a parchment-lined baking sheet before covering with oiled plastic wrap. Once again, leaving it to its own devices for one to two hours until
nearly doubled in size. Then comes the sticky issue
of sesame seed adhesion. I'm going with a water
wash to keep things vegan and to prevent browning,
but that's gonna have all the sticking power of, well, water, so they're probably gonna have all the staying power of my hairline. Either way, these guys are headed into a preheated 350 degree Fahrenheit oven for 15 to 18 minutes until
nicely puffed and set, and registering between 195
to 205 degrees Fahrenheit at their thickest point. Allow to cool completely on the trays if they're on the lower
end of that spectrum. Now, onto the issue of
vegan cheese-style product. Once again, I'm only making
one of each of these burgers, so I don't wanna make a huge amount of each different color of cheese, so I'm lining these muffin
tins with oiled plastic wrap and using them as a mold for each color. For the cheese itself, in the bowl of a blender goes
200 grams of rinsed cashew, 200 grams of refined coconut oil, two tablespoons plus one
teaspoon of kappa carrageenan, 25 grams of arrow root powder,
two teaspoons of kosher salt, one and a half teaspoons of onion powder, one teaspoon of garlic powder, 25 grams of nutritional
yeast, 15 mil of lemon juice, 100 mil of sauerkraut or pickle brine, and 375 mil of cold water. This stuff's all getting blended together into rather a thick pasty paste, for which you're probably
gonna need to enlist the help of your favorite blender stuffer, pureeing for at least 60
seconds on high speed, with varying levels of difficulty
until completely smooth. Next up, you're gonna gently
heat this on the stove top until it reaches 180 degrees Fahrenheit. I can't seem to find footage of this. Maybe I didn't hit record, but here's the stuff
after it's been cooked, which I'm now distributing
into each muffin cavity, where I'm gonna proceed to tint it using a little bit of food
coloring and a tiny whisk. This should hopefully yield six pucks of sliceable, meltable,
colorful vegan cheese. All it needs is to be
covered and refrigerated at least four hours or up to overnight to set up the kappa carrageenan and hopefully giving it a
bouncy cheese-like texture. Now, upon extraction, I discovered that the
tiny whisk betrayed me and the cheese color was not
as consistent as I had hoped, but it was delightfully
sliceable, kept its shape, and was actually very cheesy. It definitely tasted funkier and cheesier than American cheese does, even though that's
obviously not saying much. If you're gonna make this yourself with food coloring for some reason, maybe just add the food coloring before putting it in the mold. Now, onto the patty part
of the Pretty Patty. Obviously, there's a
wealth of colors in nature that we can put to good use, but how do we turn them
into veggie patties? So, as you can see, for that, I am preparing a litany of legumes, cooking these three
different colors of lentils to their various states of done-ness, draining a whole bunch of
different colored beans, and peeling some purple potatoes. Normally, I would just
cover these with cold water and cook them like it was any other day, but we wanna make these
things as purple as possible, so we're gonna cover them with cold water and cook them like it's any other day, but during their last
three minutes of cooking, I'm gonna add some
thinly-sliced purple cabbage, making sure that it's fully submerged before adding a teaspoon of baking powder, which uses science or magic or both to turn the cabbage and the cooking water a brilliant shade of blue. Definitely not totally necessary, but I wanted to try it out, and this seemed as
applicable an application as I could apply it to. Go ahead and spread this
out in a rimmed baking sheet so that it can cool entirely before being fashioned into a burger. Also, corn. Just corn. Now, it's finally time to
start prettying patties. The patty equation we
decided to work with was one part cooked vegetable,
in this case, spinach, one part legumes, I'm using half green
lentils, half edamame, half a part the grain of your choice, I'm using brown rice, one quarter part breadcrumbs
or ground oats for a binder, one tablespoon vital wheat gluten, and salt and pepper to taste. Pulse until a ground beef-like
consistency is achieved, thickening with more rice, ground oats, or vital wheat gluten as needed, and there you have it, our green patty. I don't have super high
hopes for this one. Let's try yellow, starting
with yellow lentils the aforementioned corn,
ground oats, and brown rice. I'm more excited about this one because basically it's
just a fried corn cake. Then, for orange, I'm going
grated carrot for the vegetable, brown rice for the grain, and vital wheat gluten for the binder. Medium hopes for this one. I love carrots, but I've never described
them as burger-like. Next up, for red, I'm going
kidney beans for the legume, what I know are gonna be divisive, sun-dried tomatoes for the vegetable, brown rice for the grain, and ground oats for the binder. Pulse until pebbly, and, let's
be honest, not red enough, so this is gonna be the
one patty where I cheat with a little bit of food color. So let's all just collectively pretend that we didn't see that. And then, for purple, as
you might have guessed, I'm going with peeled and grated beets. This, along with some
neutrally-colored pinto beans, produced a picture perfect purple patty. Next up, our blue potatoes and cabbage are gonna be accompanied by blue corn tortilla chips, brown rice, and vital wheat gluten for a patty that I'm pretty
sure is gonna taste awesome. I mean, it's mostly potatoes and chips. So, there you have it. Six different veggie burger bases, each of which I'm gonna
press into two-ounce patties the same width as our buns. The last bit of prep that now remains is the slicing of the vegan cheese, and given that the stuff has
the consistency of Play-Doh, it might be more about
shaping than slicing. Once you get your cheese
arts and crafts ready to go, we can start slicing our buns. I wanted to make consistent
even cuts, and as it turned out, a coaster from today's sponsor was the perfect pedestal
upon which to prop our pain. "Pain," of course, being French for bread. First things first, once
our buns are sliced, we gotta toast them. I don't care what your burger's made of. I don't care what you're made of. You deserve a toasted bun. Once everybody's varying
degrees of visibly golden brown, we're gonna make sure that our pan is nice and hot and well-oiled, considering that our patties have little to no fat of their own. As you can see, each patty
browns at a different rate, so be sure to keep a close eye on crusts, especially if you're making six different kinds of
veggie burgers at a time. Also, use caution when flipping with all that excess oil in the pan. Once everybody's fried up,
it's time to color coordinate and serve each patty, bun, and cheese, getting carefully color matched before being placed on a large
balsa wood artist palette in the same color order and orientation as presented by SpongeBob on the show, and there you have it, folks. Pretty Patties. Lots of stuff to unpack here, so let's go one at a time. I'm scared of losing
even more sesame seeds, but we must take a look
at these cross sections. First up, the green Pretty Patty. While this particular veggie burger was decidedly veggie-oriented
in its flavors, it had a nice little crisp to it and played really well
with the vegan cheese. Next up, the orange patty. Look at that cheese sorta kind of melt, and this one was good. It didn't really taste like carrots, but not much like anything else either. Next up, the purple,
violet, or mauve patty, which mostly just tasted like beets, which means I'm not gonna eat
it unless there's goat cheese. Next up, the yellow corn patty, which, to my disappointment,
only barely tasted like corn. Next up, the indigo or
midnight blue patty. This is the one I'm most excited about, and it's pretty good, but it really does just taste
like a tortilla chip burger. Last up, the red patty made from sun-dried tomatoes and beans. Now, this one at least kind
of looks like cartoon meat, but it doesn't taste as
much like sun-dried tomatoes as I had hoped. So let's rank 'em. First up, purple beets, not so great. Next up, yellow corn, about as bland a burger as ever there was. Almost the same story for
the orange carrot burger. Then the red sun-dried tomato burger. A little bit more flavor, but
still kind of disappointing. Then the blue burger, which was good, but maybe a little morally questionable. Then, believe it or not, I
think the green was my favorite. It's a veggie burger
that's not pretending to be anything other than just
that, a veggie burger, but I think we can agree there's one thing that all
these patties have in common. They are indeed pretty. Thanks again to Cash App. That's money. That's Cash App. Download Cash App from the App Store or Google Play Store today to add your cash tag to the
80 million and counting. (lively music)
This was a great episode. Classic Binging with Babish, IMO.
Imagine this was on a lot of people’s suggestion lists for a long time.
They match our purses!
They remind me of home
Pretty Patties RULE!!!
The absolute madman.
I was always against this one because it seemed like Step 1 Add Dye to Borger Step 2 Done.
Count on Andrew to somehow turn that into half a dozen different recipes.
couldn't he have used aquafaba for the egg wash instead of water?
I’ve wanted this since day 1
"What's next? Bowtie French fries? Sequined milkshake?"
Loved this, premise is a ton of fun and a ton of cooking knowledge. Best in a while tbh
Missed out on the tartan patty