Best. Sermon. Ever - Week 4: Lust, Divorce, and Oaths

[Music] [Applause] [Music] [Applause] [Music] [Applause] [Music] hi church family I'm Dan and this is my wife Kristin and we're so glad you've joined us today we want to welcome you to 1120 to online this week we're in a teaching series from the book of Matthew called best sermon ever where we're looking at the Sermon on the Mount that was delivered by the best preacher ever Jesus in our time together we're going to be worshipping through singing through the preaching of God's Word and through our response to the good news of the gospel of Jesus Christ here at the Church of 11:22 we respond to the gospel in three ways first we respond by singing in Colossians God tells us to sing with thankfulness in our hearts so wherever you are let's worship together with joy by singing we'll have an opportunity to sing both before and after the sermon today we also respond by bringing at any time during this broadcast you can bring God your first and your best by clicking on the give button and finally we respond by praying one of the unique things about 11:22 Online is that at anytime dear service pastors and ministers are available to pray with simply share your prayer needs or questions in the chat box and if you'd like to chat one-on-one with one of our pastors or ministers just click the library option to be connected for Christian deny worshiping with our church family is one of the most important things that we do as a family every week the Church of 11:22 is a movement for all people to discover and deepen a relationship with Jesus Christ this is a place for you let's lean in sing loud and worship Jesus together [Music] all right sing along with [Music] now the darkness fades to new beginnings as we lift our eyes [Music] creation the next back tisha c'mon c'mon [Music] another sign is bridge oh Jesus his cries teachers respond [Music] and our creations shine [Music] to clear this out in faith we sing [Music] forever strong surrenders [Music] will not be mu when the earth gives way for the reason one is overcome if for every fear there's an MC there is [Music] by the king of my be the mountain where I run a fountain I drink from oh he is my song at the king of my heart be the shower [Music] here's my song as you are [Music] Oh you are [Music] you are good [Music] [Applause] [Music] let the King be the way the girl see the key be the slide love is the my days the key see [Music] the key the fire inside [Music] [Music] [Music] [Music] you'll never go there you're never gonna learn me down you're never gonna them you're never gonna let me down you're never gone there it never gonna let me down you're never going there it never gonna let me down [Music] let me down [Music] [Music] [Laughter] [Music] [Music] [Music] [Music] [Music] hi my name is Rick this is my beautiful wife Dawn we are here in Israel on the mount of beatitudes please stand with the reading of God's Word and you have heard that it was said you shall not commit adultery but I say to you that everyone who looks at a woman with lustful intent has already committed adultery with her in his heart if your right eye causes you to sin tear it out and throw it away what is better that you lose one of your members and that your whole body be thrown into hell and if your right hand causes you to sin cut it off and throw it away for it is better that you lose one of your members and that your full body go into hell it was also said whoever divorces his wife let him give her a certificate of divorce but I say to you that everyone who divorces his wife except on the ground of sexual immorality makes her commit adultery and whoever marries a divorced woman commits adultery again you have heard that it was said to those of old you shall not swear falsely but shall perform to the Lord what you have sworn but I say to you do not take an oath at all either by heaven for it is the throne of God or by birth for his his foots feet or by Jerusalem what is the city of the Great King and do not take an oath by your head for you cannot make one hair white or black let what you say be simply yes or no anything more than this comes from evil you can be seated for the past few weeks we've been studying the best sermon ever preached by Jesus and famously known as the Sermon on the Mount parents listen in this week's sermon is pg-13 we have an experience that's custom-built for your kids you can access that anytime at CU e to to.com slash kids or by choosing the kids option on screen as God would lead you to take next steps we want to help you follow him simply fill out the next steps information let us know what God's up to in your life and how we can be a part each week as a church we respond to God by bringing our tithes and our offerings back to him at any time you can choose to give option on screen you can give through our app or you can visit Cu e to to.com slash gift as we study Jesus's words I know the Holy Spirit's gonna encourage you and that he is going to bring healing and hope to so many of us as the Spirit of God is at work in your life we want to pray for you and we want to be a part our host and the live prayer option are there so that we can pray with each other we're about to open God's Word and pastor Joby's going to be leaving us in this week's teaching of best sermon ever so grab your Bible grab your discipleship journal unless navien so in 2005 when things hit the fan for us there wasn't really a whole lot of normalcy in our marriage when we first got married both of us had come out of the Catholic Church and I wouldn't say we were both considered disciples of Jesus I came into our marriage with a pornography addiction and was November 9th 2005 kind of when things went went sour for us Mona had found out that I had had a an extramarital affair I I was just going through thoughts in my head and I thought well you know we have three children and they were young [Music] but seeing him just do everything anything he could names for for to get help and I think that's what snapped me out of wanting to end the marriage and I don't think I was the perfect wife just a sinful and this whole thing and it was from from November 9th 2005 for about six years we went through a really difficult time of allowing God to restore and heal and redeem the brokenness in our marriage so when we received our devotionals and our trip itinerary looking through the itinerary and just so happens that our 25th wedding anniversary fell on the exact day that we would be in jericho the night before our wedding vow renewal it's 3:00 in the morning and I can't sleep and so I went back into the book of Joshua and I'd heard this story and read this story and her teachings on his story so many times and never picked up on the gem that the Lord gave me and that was Rahab being the hopf of the harlot or the prostitute her entire life the one involved in sexual sin her entire life God chose to redeem and restore her out of Jericho it's messy and it's broken and it's really sad I just am grateful to to my children understand what the word forgiveness means it then um they know that not just something you do with something you have to give your whole heart in and and that you give it all to the Lord and He will stand in front of pastor Jovi making covenants with my wife after a lifetime of sin there was not a greater moment in my life that revealed the glory of God to redeem in his desire to restore through the pain through the sin through the brokenness he had a plan and a purpose for us as a couple from the time the [Music] amen and amen if you got your Bibles we are gonna be in Matthew chapter 5 as we continue in this series best sermon ever as we walk verse by verse through Jesus's teaching on the Sermon on the Mount and nothing says happy mother's day like a teaching on lust divorce and oaths and so I know this could be a tough one but before we dive into this we do want to say happy Mother's Day I know that Jesus is the head of the church but from the empty tomb until today the backbone of the church has been some praying momma's and so to all you mamas happy Mother's Day and to all of you who have mamas make sure that you honor them today whether you're watching this on Thursday or Saturday or Sunday make sure you call your momma buy her some gifts I know like spas and stuff for clothes right now so stock up do whatever it takes to make a big deal out of momma's and so one of the ways to your church our church level 22 wanted to honor some moms is we know that there are a bunch of single moms that are a part of this church and are connected someway to this church and so what we did this week just to honor some moms in honor of Mother's Day is this there was a single mom there's a single mom who has been a part of a ministry that we partner with called Hadassah's hope and Hadassah's hope goes into strip clubs to just try to love the people that are working there and offer them the hope of the gospel of Jesus Christ and there's a single mom in one of the clubs who has decided to walk away from that lifestyle and so the Church of 11:22 is partnering with Hadassah's hope could cover her bills for a season so that she is able to do that also we partnered with another ministry called the carpenter's shop which were works with some like under-resourced children and through that ministry we we've met another single mom and who needs a vehicle and so we are partnering with auto line the owners of auto line our covenant members of the church of eleven 22 and we our church is paying for half the car and auto line is paying for half the car for this single mom to get a car and if you need a car you should go to auto line and that is a commercial but I don't care those brothers are incredible what they are doing for the sake of the gospel there at auto line so we're honoring them there and then all of the women at Windsor assisted living facility or receiving corsages this Mother's Day just to say thank you and we love you and to honor those Mama's so mother's we honor you on this Mother's Day now page 18 in your discipleship journal if you have downloaded that I hope you have maybe printed it out that's where we're gonna be Matthew chapter 5 picking up in verse 27 and we're gonna talk about lust and divorce and oaths and I'm just gonna tell you it's gonna be a tough one man I don't know that I have ever labored over a sermon like I have this one and sometimes jokingly I will say hey don't get mad at me I'm just the mailman I don't write it I just deliver it but this week it has been quite the weight to bear and I just want I just wanted to tell you what I've been praying for this week I've been praying that marriages would be saved the chains of addiction would be broken that healing would happen that divorce would be avoided that sin would be forgiven that repentance would happen that the whispers of condemnation would be hushed that the gospel would be work and be on display and above all else that love will reign and just know this I love you like crazy and I love you enough to tell you the truth of God's Word and that he is good and His Word is good and his way is better and before we dive into this I need you to know you getyou minded you might want to go ahead and memorize Romans 8:1 says therefore now there is no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus so if you hear these whispers of condemnation then you've got to know that condemnation is not the language of the Father con nation is the language which is a lie of the enemy and condemnation says that you are unfit for use however in Romans chapter 1 we find out that that conviction is the kindness of God that leads us to repentance and so if you feel these be these nudging of conviction of sin in our life then understand that is God's goodness towards us condemnation unfit for use is alive from the enemy and and conviction is a warm invitation from the Holy Spirit to turn back to God so here we go chapter 5 verse 27 Jesus again he's talking to the Pharisees he's talking to a crowd he lays out to be attitudes and then he says unless your righteousness exceeds that of the Pharisees and you have no part of the kingdom of heaven and everybody thought well there's no chance then that I'm getting in and men he takes the law of God and six times he references the Mosaic law you have heard that it was said but what the Pharisees would do is they would take the law of God and they would only speak of it physically and then what Jesus is going to do six times is but I say to you it's not just an activity matter it's a heart matter the first one he does we talked about last week with anger he goes for the jugular and we're all unrighteous after the first one you've heard that said don't murder well I say if you got anger in your heart you're a murderer and we're like well we're out the second one he wakes everybody out on it - you've heard that it was said that you shall not commit adultery it's the seventh commandment by the way but I say to you that everyone who looks at a woman with lustful intent has already committed adultery with her in his heart to which everybody says uh-oh now the question is what is lustful intent is it noticing somebody pretty no that's not what it is if you have eyeballs in a brain you can just notice these things you can appreciate that somebody is handsome or prettier that's not what lustful intent is lustful intent is when you commodify a person for your own pleasure that instead of seeing someone as an image-bearer of God you look at someone as a as a commodity for your own pleasure to be used by you for you and I think it even goes beyond that I think that lustful intent is also when you choose sexual or relational fantasy over reality and so we've got these dumb phrases in our society that I hear for men like you can look at the menu as long as you don't buy well what a dumb thing to say you see the majority of pornography is it's really violence against women and and using women as a commodity to be used up for your own pleasure listen daughters of the Most High King are not a piece of meat on a menu for you to peruse that is that is not what they are but when we do that it is lustful intent and what Jesus is saying is you've got a deep problem down here in your heart and women for you although pornography use in women is growing maybe more than any other group of people but often it's about choosing romantic fantasy like to look at the reality that you have in your marriage and choose a novel like Fifty Shades of Grey to try to escape and go in that direction and Jesus is saying listen when you do that when you do those things when you go down those roads you see what begins to happen is you feel justified because you think I haven't touched a person it's just pictures or I don't haven't had an affair I've just got you know I just read this book to escape from reality and Jesus is saying no no no no no it's not just pictures and pages but in your heart you have been good you've begun to go down a road that already leads to destruction so everyone who looks at a woman with lustful intent has already committed adultery in his heart so if we'll agree that is some of us may probably all of us then we'd say all right Jesus well what do we do and then listen to what he says you think I'm intense preacher listen to this Jesus says if your right eye causes you to sin because that's usually where it starts starts with our eyes if your right eye causes you to sin tear it out throw it away now imagine if you're listening to this sermon you're waiting for Jesus to explain while he doesn't mean what he's saying the only problem is he never gets to that part where he tries to explain away I was just kidding he says if your right eye causes you just saying tear it out throw it away for it is better that you lose one of your members than that your whole body be thrown into hell and if your right hand causes you to sin then cut it off and throw it away for it is better that you lose one of your members then your whole body go to hell so what you say Jesus that's pretty extreme do it I think Jesus would say this is extremely important you think it's just a look you think it's just a picture you think it's just a fantasy I'm saying it leads the hell it leads the Sheol it leads to utter destruction I know we got a lot of new people turn tuning in but just a few weeks ago I taught on on the letter from Jesus to the church at Thyatira and I dealt with this like crazy I'd encourage you to go back and listen to it that that the temptation of lust the temptation toward sexual immorality it is not just a snapshot it's not just a moment in time it is a pathway and we studied proverbs chapter five six and seven and in that there's an older guy teaching a younger guy be careful son be careful son be careful son because you walk down the road and you're going to get to a corner and you look down the street you're at a corner and you look down the street and at the end of the street is a prostitute in the prostitutes house and the young and the son the young man thing I'll just take a couple steps down this road and it'll be fine I can manage this and the dad and the proverbs six seven five six and seven says no you can't manage this bro who can hold fire close to his chest and not get burned and everybody trying to justify their lust says I can and then he says nah man cuz when you begin to go down that road you're like a stag who has been shot in the liver and a liver shot stag is a dead stag walking he just doesn't know it yet Jesus said this is very very very important that every path has a destination now when it comes to us part of the reason we're not gonna spend the whole time on loss is because I just taught it a few weeks ago but when I taught on pathways in regards to lust I primarily taught about it again it's very very important but I would just say this linear lust management and decision making though very important is not enough it's not enough yes you should have covenant eyes on your on your laptop and all of your devices and yes you should have accountability partners and yes you can confess your sin and yes you should flee sexual immorality yes you should do all those things but if all you tried to do when it comes to lust is sin management you will lose the battle I think a part of what he means when he says gouge out your eye and cut off your hand is we have to go to extreme measures for those who struggle with lust like in here and this is true too whether it's a full-on addiction like you are consumed by lustful thoughts all the time or just as dangerous is if you just occasionally dabble in pornography I think you're actually in the clutches of the devil right there because you think you have it under control and then the devil is like man I got him right where I want him you see I think if this is your struggle then then we have to go to extreme measures and here's what I think I think we have to take the Shema approach we've been studied in the Shema for two years here o Israel the Lord our God the Lord is one and as a response to our one through God we give him our one and only life therefore we should love the Lord our God with all of who we are our heart our soul our mind in our strength and I think I think we have to declare war against lust with heart soul mind and strength and I mean this you have to pay attention to your heart you have to pay attention to how you were raised your most important relationships the relationship you have with your mom and your dad the relationships that you had with sexual partners with those kinds of things because it's in the shaping of that heart that leads you to go down these places and most of us will avoid that and just put some software on our computer and I think you have to come at it at the soul level it is demonic to have to having a an addiction to pornography there is a demonic element I mean what else would you call it how many times have you promised you never going to do it again but in that moment you feel like there's a thing in you driving you to do things you don't want to do what you want to call it I think you got to handle it at the soul level I think you have to handle it at the mind level you pay attention to your thought life like what are the thoughts and feelings that lead you to be most vulnerable to the sin of lust futility disassociation anger disappointment and in addition to that we have to handle it at the physical strength level environment doesn't matter if you don't want to gouge out - I throw your phone in the ocean that should be part of it if you don't want to cut off your hand quit your job I mean if she is that tempting quit your job you can get another job that you have that is your family it is worth it I read a book this week one of the blessings of quarantine man I read like 4 books a week or something I read a book called unwanted by a guy named Jay stringer I would highly recommend this book now as I say this I'm not necessarily saying everything that's brother rights I am affirming cuz I don't know I hadn't had time to check them all out and all that and there's a few there's a bunch of stuff in this book that makes me uncomfortable the book is called unwanted basically the book is this feeling unwanted it's often the source of unwanted sexual activity but what this guy does is he goes at this heart soul mind and strength not just accountability partners and software for your computer it's extremely important in the book of 1st Corinthians chapter 6 Paul has some extreme language he's gonna say when it comes to sexual sin when it comes to lust it's not just to be managed it's to be killed here's what Paul says first grader's chapter 6 verse 9 says or do you not know that the unrighteous will not inherit the kingdom of God remember Jesus basically says the same thing in the Sermon on the Mount and then he says do not be deceived neither the sexually immoral that word is porn a Oh same words Jesus is going to use in the Sermon on the Mount nor idolaters nor adulterers nor men who practice homosexuality nor thieves nor the greedy nor drunkards nor revilers nor swindlers will inherit the kingdom of God this is important verse 11 and such were some of you were past tense but you were washed you were sanctified you were justified in the name of the Lord Jesus Christ and by the spirit of God in other words your past sin even sexual sin and your current struggle even sexual struggle doesn't get to define you as your pastor I want you to be able to walk in the freedom that Christ purchased for you when it comes to lust and sexual sin because that's not who you are it's who you were but the old you is dead so how about get up and walk in the freedom that Christ has purchased for you and then he goes on to say all things are lawful for me but not all things are helpful all things are lawful for me but I will not be dominated by anything food is meant for the stomach and stomach for the food and God will destroy both one and the other notice how some of those things are in quotes essentially what Paul is doing is Paul is disassembling some of the the thought life in first in Corinth during this time they believed in this false dichotomy between the body and the soul that you could give your soul or your heart to Jesus but you could do whatever you want to with your body you see you don't just have a soul you are a soul and a body and then he goes on to say the body is not meant for sexual immorality but for the Lord and the Lord for the body and God raised the Lord and will also raise us up by his power do you not know that your bodies are members of Christ and they would say no we didn't know that Paul so he goes on to say shall I then take the members of Christ and make them members of a prostitute never see what was happening in Corinth is that Christians once they got saved again they believed in this false dichotomy which Americans do - I can give my heart to Jesus I can do whatever I want to with my body so they'd be in church on Sunday and they'd be slipping with temple prostitutes on Tuesday nights and they would say no no no that's fine that's not I just I gave my eternity to Jesus and I'm just giving my Tuesday to the prostitute and Paul's like nah bro you don't get to do that he's Lord of all of your life would you take a member of Christ and make them members of a prostitute never or do you not know that he who is joined to a prostitute becomes one body with her for as it is written the two will become one flesh he's quoting the book of Genesis the sex is not just physical they do this it's spiritual it's emotional it's really supernatural that in God's economy one plus one equals one but he who is joined to the Lord becomes one in spirit with him and then he says these words flee from sexual immorality don't flirt with it don't see how close you can get to it don't play around with it like the private says do you think you can hold fire close to your chest and not get burned well if you don't want to get burned run away from the fire flee sexual immorality this means no matter how extreme it seems run away from I don't care what kind of rules you got to make up I don't care who you have to offend and this is how big a deal this is in the book of Ephesians chapter 6 Paul says when you see the enemy stand firm against the devil and his evil schemes that's it when you see the devil himself stand firm in faith get all dressed up in your armor of God and go to won't go to war but when you see sexual temptation run Forrest run get out of here no matter how extreme it seems it is extremely important why Paul here's why because every other sin a person commits outside of the body but this but the sexually immoral person sins against his own body it's not unforgivable it's just different then he says or do you not know that your body is a temple of the Holy Spirit within you whom you have from God you are not your own you were bought with a price so glorify God in your body I mention that book unwanted and again a big part of the book is based on your past experience and current circumstances and the way you're wired if you feel unwanted you are more likely to act out an unwanted sexual activity Paul says but here's the deal in the gospel you are not your own you were bought with a price God wants you God wants you so much that he was willing to send His Son Jesus Christ who died on the cross even knowing all of your lust and all of your perversion and all of your sin and all of your wicked thoughts he still wanted you and he sent Jesus to rescue you and to redeem you you are not unwanted and so Jesus talks about lust so he goes anger lust and then the next one he talks about is divorced now hold on tight these are tough words tough words verse 31 jesus says it was also said whoever divorces his wife let him give her a certificate of divorce but I say to you that everyone who divorces his wife except on the ground of sexual immorality makes her commit adultery and whoever marries a divorced woman commits adultery now I know what some of you are saying right now okay pastor now tell me why that doesn't mean what it says and here's what I have to tell you I cannot do that and I will not do that I love you too much here's the conversation I refuse to have I refuse to stand before Jesus one day and say hey Jesus there are some people that I love very much and these words would hurt their feelings and so I skipped that part I just refused to have that conversation and it would not be love for me to not teach this it would actually be it would be cowardly first of all because I would care more about what you think about me then how much I am called to love you it would also be very selfish of me to skip over this part because the selfishness would be let me just save myself the emails this week it would also be very very short-sighted to just say what people want to hear and ultimately it would undercut the truth that God is good and His Word is good and it's all for our good now the good news is I've told you this 10,000 times the best way to study the Bible is always use the Bible as commentary for itself before you want to know what I think and before you want to know what all the theologians think first of all see what the Bible has to say on the subject that you're and so I get it I'm sure there's 10,000 questions especially at our church and so a couple of questions that you may have is this when is divorce permitted it's a legitimate question is it ever okay to get divorced and remarry legitimate question for some of you are in this situation I am divorced and remarried what do I do am i living in adultery and some of you say well what about me I'm single I'm divorced and single what do I do or I've never been married I'm single and I want to be alright well we're gonna just walk through these with the Scriptures first of all if you're single I would say to you first and foremost in Matthew chapter 19 and verse Corinthians 7 I don't have time to go all the way into what they have to say about singleness but in 1st Corinthians 7 and Matthew chapter 19 Jesus and Paul commend you to leverage your singleness for the sake of the gospel that he affirms it and says you trust in Jesus to be all sufficient and use this time in your life to to advance the kingdom of God now before we dive into divorce and when is it okay to get divorced in all of this I think you got to start with the purpose of marriage and what Jesus does in Matthew chapter 19 we'll get there in just a second is when the Pharisees try to ask him about when it isn't okay to get divorced before he talks about what divorce is he starts with the purpose of marriage now I'm gonna tell you in in evangelical churches most of the time we have taken marriage and put it up we've like idolized marriages as is it is the ultimate goal but according to the Bible marriage is not the goal marriage is but a temporary means to an eternal end and that the ultimate purpose of marriage has nothing to do with your personal satisfaction and fulfillment at best that is a byproduct but the purpose of marriage is to glorify God by putting on display a picture of God's covenant love for us that is the purpose of Mary's not so that you give what you all not so that you fulfilled that is not what it is not to satisfy your loneliness because no human can do those things I mean the greatest lie that we've ever been told in my generation is that you complete me as if some other human could do for you what only a relationship with Jesus could do for you and would you peep that kind of pressure on another human being whatever you idolize when they let you down you will demonize them and so the ultimate purpose for marriage is to glorify God by putting on display a picture of God's covenant love for us so husbands Ephesians chapter 5 tells us that we should love our wives like Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her is the way that you were loving your wife showing the world how much Christ loves us or if you were harsh with your wife if we are harsh with our wives then the world thinks that Jesus is harsh with us and if we are absent from our wives and family then you are saying that Jesus doesn't really care about us that much and if you cheat then you are saying that Jesus is not faithful and wives the way you are respecting and encouraging and cheering and celebrating their husband that would be my modern definition of the Greek word for submit to your own husband the way that you're respecting encouraging cheering and celebrating your husband shows the world how the church should honor Christ so if you are critical then you were putting on display that God is out of touch and he doesn't know what he's doing and if you dishonor Jesus we make Jesus look unworthy of honor and so before we get into divorce because here's a lot of married people like me can look at the teaching on divorce and think like the Pharisees are you talking to me because I ain't commit adultery I don't look at porn and yet the challenge is deeper and down at the heart level and so if your marriage needs help I would implore you getting a group joint on zoom' you can just observe you don't even really have to dig in at first but please please please get help so when is it okay when does God say it is okay there's a couple of clauses that we see here in Matthew chapter 5 and in Matthew 19 and in 1st Corinthians 7 which are exception clauses to divorce Matthew 19 says this first one now when Jesus had finished these sayings he went away from Galilee and he entered the region of Judea beyond the Jordan and large crowds followed him and He healed him there and the Pharisees came up to and tested him by asking is it lawful to divorce one's wife for any cost let me just say this if you were looking at the to get divorced you will find as many reasons as you want to find now Jesus the way he answers this is going to say you're asking the wrong question any answer have you not read if you could only understand the first century insult that is going on here they are professional Bible readers this would be like saying to a pastor own staff if they ask a question and be like do you not read your Bible that this is as insulting as it gets have you not read that he who created them from the beginning made them male and female so what Jesus does is saying your question is dumb let's go back to God's original intent and he said therefore a man shall leave his father and mother and hold fast to his wife the word hold fast here in Hebrew literally means covenant covenants with his wife and the two shall become one flesh that in God's economy one plus one equals one now again because of our crazy times we live in the Supreme Court does not define marriage the Supreme King of the universe defines marriage and he defines marriage as one man and one woman for one lifetime that's how he defines from the beginning then he says so they are no longer two but one flesh what therefore God has joined together let not man separate in other words don't unone what God made 1 there is a supernatural covenant Union here so then they said to him the Pharisees say to Jesus well why did Moses command one to give a certificate of divorce and to send her away they're talking about Deuteronomy chapter 24 verses 134 and Jesus says them because of your hardness of heart Moses allowed you to divorce your wives but from the beginning it was not so here's what he say Jesus is saying Moses never commanded anybody to get divorced but he made a concession because what was going on was there was a chaos of divorce in the Old Covenant and men were just divorcing their wives for whatever reason they wanted to and the rabbi's came up with this system that you could divorce your wife if if you just for whatever reason and so Moses says you have to write her a certificate of divorce that says she has not been unfaithful so that she people won't kill her so that she can do business that this was to protect women that were being abused that's what Moses his intent was and now what you are doing is trying to use the letter of the law to get what you want that's what you're doing so he says because of your hardness of heart Moses allowed you to divorce your wives but from the beginning it was not so and then Jesus gives what he thinks and I say to you whoever divorces his wife , except for sexual immorality and marries another commits adultery you see during this time there were two two leading rabbinical thoughts on why you could get divorce one was from the school of Shema not like what we were memorizing sha mmm ai and it allowed divorce only for reasons of an chastity but it demanded and commanded divorce that that if your wife cheated on you then you had a divorce then there was a more liberal school called Hallel and it stated that the Mosaic stipulation of indecency allowed a man to divorce his wife for whatever he considered unpleased to him and so literally burnt fish and burnt toasts were on the list okay a lot of you'd be in trouble so Jesus is like you get this whole thing messed up the God's original intent is that one man and one woman would be made one in a covenant that represented the Covenant that God has for us so after Jesus lays this out again except for sexual immorality anybody that gets divorce and marries another commits adultery so the disciples are listening to this and they say him if such is the case of a man with his wife it's better not to marry to which I think Jesus is like right you got it right yeah this is do you not to walk into this lightly thinking well if this doesn't work out then I'll just write a certificate or a divorce and try again then he goes on the next bunch of verses are about eunuchs which is complicated right now so I'll just say it's it's about whether you're single by choice single because of something that happened to you or single because God gifted you with singleness he encourages it so when is it okay to get divorced according to Matthew chapter 19 according to Matthew chapter five number one is adultery that when your spouse cheats on you that breaks that covenant it is so damaging that Jesus concedes not commands please hear me the Jesus concedes not commands that you may walk away from that covenant that you made because the damage is so deep particularly if it is unrepentant continued sexual immorality that that's how damaging it is however however first of all if your smell spouse's has committed adultery listen I I empathize I have no idea the hurt and the pain that that would feel like I just can't even get my mother in it but divorce should not be your first response as a Christian it should be your last resort divorce is like an amputation to try to unlearn what God has made one like if you even if you broke your ankle severely your first option is not take the leg off it is the last resort to save your whole body and here's why here's why in Ephesians chapter 5 husbands love your wife like Christ loved the church how many times does the church been unfaithful to him and has he ever broken his covenant with us never ever ever ever okay secondly there's an entire book of the Bible called Hosea where God to give an illustration for his covenant one-way love towards us tells Hosea a prophet to go and marry a prostitute named Gomer first of all if God tells you to marry a girl named Gomer that's that I mean that's some serious red flags already and he goes and he marries Gomer a prostitute to show the world how much God loves us and then Gomer does what Gomer does she abandons him she goes around sleeping with some other people I mean God goes back to Hosea says take all of your money and go buy her off the auction auction block again and it is a picture of what God has done to our adulterous hearts third if you've been cheated on the tomb is empty anything is possible if sinners can be reconciled to a holy God then surely somebody that has sinned against you you can be reconciled with I'm not saying you have to I get it I get it sometimes the damage is beyond repair and but that should be the last resort and not your first response if the Spirit of God can meet the son of God in his lifeless body in the tomb and breathe life into the lifeless son of God early the Spirit of God can breathe life into your marriage though you think it's days and again there are for sure reasons and adultery is one of them and that may be the only option let it not be the first option so that's what adultery is a reason a biblical reason to get divorced a second biblical reason to get divorced is abandonment abandonment if you go to first Corinthians chapter 7 Paul gives all of this advice on marriage there is there's even some parts in here that are kind of crazy at to pay very close attention because there are times in 1st Corinthians 7 where Paul is like hey this next part I'm saying this is for me this is not from the Lord and then he'll say now I'm about to talk to the Lord again okay so you gotta pay close attention to this and Paul was not a big fan of marriage if you just want to know the truth Paul said I wish you guys would not be married like me because an unmarried man what's he got to worry about but a married man he's got a whole lot to worry about can I get an amen you better not so he says things like Paul says things like to the unmarried and the widow's I say that it is good for them to remain single as I am but if they cannot exercise self-control they should marry for it is better to marry than burn with passion I have never heard these verses at a wedding here's Ted he's gonna marry Nancy and Ted was gonna be single but he burned with passion so he picked her y'all ready I've never heard that before not but this is what he's talking about now in the church at Corinth there's a bunch of air buddies pagans in Corinth and then the gospel enters Corinth and people are getting saved and sometimes one of the spouses would become a Christian but the other one wouldn't and the unbeliever was like this is crazy I didn't marry Christian I'm out and so to that he says this verse 15 but if the unbelieving partner separates let it be so in such cases the brother or sister is not enslaved God has called you to peace for how do you know wife whether you will save your husband or how do you know husband whether you will save your wife in other words if if the spouse wants to abandon you then you cannot stop them and God makes concession for that but what he's saying is is that you cannot if you're the believer you cannot initiate it because you have no idea how God may use you for the salvation of your spouse though if you are abandoned then there is concession for you to get divorced and then the third one would be abuse adultery abandonment abuse let me just be very clear if you are being abused if your children are being abused you need to get out you need to call the authorities and you need to call us at the church so that we can help you walk through this and I don't have time to do all that I need to do here but I would just simply say if someone is abusing you they are acting like an unbeliever and they are abandoning you so under first Corinthians chapter 7 then you should get out Malachi chapter 2 verse 16 says this it's kind of a paraphrase God hates divorce --is and he despises the one that would cover his garment with violence in a Jewish wedding they would wrap a prayer shawl over the husband and wife and so it would be like a picture from God's viewpoint I don't see two individuals I see one one unit under this prayer shawl and it says God hates divorce and he despises someone that would cover his garment with violence that would hit his wife so divorces for sure not in fact separation is a must immediately now in Malachi it says God hates divorce it never says God hates divorced people its primary purpose for marriage just to put on display the glory of God to put on display the gospel by showing evidence of God's covenant love towards his people then when that thing is fractured God hates it and he also hates all of the collateral damage to his children that come along with divorce so when is it okay biblically to get divorced adultery abandonment abuse please please please don't do it on complete and if you're thinking if you're in your marriage right now and you're thinking about divorce please please please know that if the tomb is empty anything is possible and as much as it is up to you reconcile with one another and be reconciled unto God and if it is the last and only option please please please allow loving brothers and sisters that love you more than they care what you think about them in that moment to walk with you through this now if you're divorced and single you say well what about me what do I do I would say trust Jesus learn to be content in any and every situation maybe maybe God has remarriage in your life or maybe not either way no other person can do for you what only Jesus can do for you now I will say where God allows for divorce then he also allows for remarriage so you ask should I get remarried the reason I'm so cautious to just give a blanket answer in a sermon that literally about like half a million people listen to is because there's about half a million different situations some of you got divorced and you had biblical reasons and you should probably never get married again for a whole host of reasons I mean it's just it's just it's just not that simple there's no one-size-fits-all whatever it is whatever it is if you've been through a divorce you should take time to heal you should take a long time to heal and you should do that in the context of the body of Christ the family of Christ to let us walk alongside of you but please do this trust that God is good whether you broke your vow or you're the victim of someone breaking a covenant against you you've got to know this that never ever ever breaks this cabinet and then whether you or the offended or the offender please know this through the blood of Jesus Christ therefore now there is no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus but God is not done with you and if some other church told this to you there somehow you were damned is good they lied to you and they were saying things that were do not line up with the gospel of Jesus Christ now there's some of you there saying well I'm divorced and remarried what about us I mean he said if we get divorced and remarried then it's adultery what about us first and foremost if if you got divorced for biblical reasons that again where God allows divorce he allows remarriage but no matter what if you're divorced and remarried you should confess and repent where you need to you may need to you may you may be have biblical grounds but you may need to call your ex and say I am sorry for the things I said wherever there is divorce somewhere there is sin and even if you have even if you are sinning against let me think about it take divorce out of it if you are sinned against with your neighbor isn't it really hard to not retaliate in sin and so wherever there was sin then we need to confess and repent and even if your second marriage wasn't sinless know this God restores and forgives and nowhere in the scriptures can I find a place where God says somehow breaking a second covenant does anything to help the first one so if you're divorcing remarried then you need to put on display the gospel of Jesus Christ in your current marriage your vowels matter and so I think this is why Jesus goes and he ends with this thing on earth sore vows he says again you have heard that it was said those of old you shall not swear falsely but shall perform to the Lord what you have sworn you remember you stood in an altar and you said til death do us part you made a promise Jesus says but I say to you don't take an oath at all either by heaven for it is the throne of my earth but it is the footstool or by Jerusalem for it is the city of the Great King and do not take an oath by your head for you cannot make one hair white or black ladies this means a lot more right now than it did a month ago done it let what you say be simply yes or no anything more than this comes from evil in other words marriage is a covenant it's not a contract it's rooted in God's covenant with us a contract is if you do your part I'll do more my part I think divorce is so high in our in our country because we walk into it like a contract and you look at the contract and you're like you're not doing your part I'm out it if your marriage is defined as a contract there will be no place for love there will not be a place for love because the best that they can do is work their way up to meeting your expectations in the contract think about the people that you have a relationship with via contract have you ever fallen in love with AT&T or Comcast no if they do everything they are supposed to do you are at least like but 9 ly ok with them the only relationship you have with them is when they don't do their part a marriage is that no matter what you do here's what I promise I love you better or sickness and health rich or poor for the glory of God till death do us part now again I'm not the I'm not the author I'm just mailman I just I just deliver it here's what I know I know that none of us are clean in this none of us are at the heart level all of us has stumbled and sinned and fallen short of the glory of God and in particular to lust and divorce and covenants and there there is picture after picture after picture of redemption in sexual brokenness in the scriptures in John chapter 4 Jesus goes to Samaria there's this woman she comes to the well they have the conversation about where you find living water and Jesus says go get your husband and she's like well I don't have a husband he's like I know you had five and the guy that you are living with now he ain't even your husband okay so let's just say she's all messed up in this area correct and you know what Jesus does Jesus does not avoid the tough situation in her life he says go and get the toughest situation that you're most embarrassed about and you need the most help in and you bring that situation to me and in that toughest situation that you're most ashamed of and you're so ashamed of you don't even get water when everybody else gets water you're here at lunchtime so you can avoid everybody else that's the thing I want to talk about and in that sexual brokenness he meets her right where she is and he forgives her and saves her and calls her his own he keeps going in John chapter 8 they find a woman caught in the act of adultery she has no defense and this woman who is clearly sinned and in the wrong when the religious leaders bring her to him and they want to they want to throw stones at her he kneels down with her eyeball to eyeball I think to let her know you were an image bearer of me and he gets eyeball to eyeball with her draw some stuff in the sand I think he confused everybody he looks at the religious people they'd like to slap labels on everybody like divorced all right all the perfect people y'all start and they're like well if the judge of the universe that's gonna start judging now I don't want him judging me and they bolt and then he looks at her and he says woman who condemns you and she looks around think about it man she is naked she got caught in the act of adultery she's bracing herself to get hit by a stone and instead she gets run over by the grace of God no one condemns me and Jesus says then neither do i condemn you but he does not stop there then he says now go and leave your life of sin she is redeemed maybe my favorite one you want to talk about a divorce and marriage that was not biblical at all how about David King David when the green it was time for the Kings to go out to war David's lazy he's laying out on his couch he goes walking out on his porch and he sees Bathsheba and he has lustful intent for her to the point where he sends one of his guys to go get her and bring her to his house and he sleeps with her she's pregnant so what does he do her husband is in the army calls him in says hey man go ahead and hook up with your wife so that he can maybe get out of this he's like no way not my mom while my men are fighting so he has his husband killed puts him on the front line knowing that he'll die in the war now what is God gonna do with that no matter how tough your sexual past is or no matter how broken the conditions by which you got into your current marriage I don't know that there is murder and divorce and adultery maybe but if so I got good news for you David eventually confesses and repents he writes Psalm 51 against you and you alone if I say no God see what you read that in your light well you kind of stand against Uriah can't you kind of send a bunch of I guess a bunch of people didn't you David but all sin is the sin against God and then in repentance he Christ created me a clean heart Oh God restore unto me the joy of your salvation and God does and not only does he restore the joy in David's life somehow he redeems this marriage that started out in a horrible way and not only does he redeem it it is it is not condemned it is not unfit for use because God uses that very marriage to produce a kid named Solomon who would build the temple and who would be in the lineage of Jesus himself and so if God can fix this mess then by the blood of Jesus Christ he can fix whatever mess you find yourself in you see here's the point that marriage is a supernatural covenant not a contract between one man and one woman till death do you part and it is ordained by God himself so if you're married and it's going okay does your marries put on display for this world the gospel and if not where do you need to repent the way we're gonna close is we're gonna sing a song and bands would come we're gonna sing a song the first thing song that we're gonna sing it's called come to the altar and you may be thinking well how can I come to the altar I'm in my living room and I don't have an altar here look an altar is not at a church meant and an altar is a place for you to meet God and he is with you so why don't you why don't you make an altar right there in your living room or right wherever you are watching it and if you're single why don't you come to the altar and why don't you lay your desires and you lay your wants and your lay your insecurities and you lay it on the altar and say Jesus I need you to be more than enough I know that you are would you just invade me with a peace that transcends understanding and if you're married won't you pray for each other and why don't you pray with a boldness maybe that you're not used to praying with husbands why don't you leave and you know how you lead why don't you be the lead repenter in the lead Confessor in your house and look at your wife and say I am so sorry that I have not loved you like Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her why don't you pray for the courage and the power to do that and why why don't you pray for your husband and if there's lust there if there's a pornography issue Hey look why don't you pray to cast that demon out of there because he does not belong in your marriage he has no rule or reign in your life get him out see the disciples they couldn't cast the demon out one time and there's like boss how come we couldn't cast it down he said this kind can only be cast out by prayer why don't you pray those kind of prayers over one another and if there's some sin in your life or some sin in your past why don't you repent confess and repent maybe you have to call somebody maybe you have to call your ex and it won't make any sense to them but it'll matter you just say I'm sorry I own this part that's on me I am sorry and if you and if your marriage is on life support right now why don't you pluck pray why don't you pray that the same power of God that breathed life into Jesus when he was dead and buried and brought him back to life that maybe that same power could be breathed into your marriage but I'm telling you healing comes first through revealing would you reveal to somebody that you need help maybe when your service is over you would reach out to a friend or join a disciple group and let your church family get around you we're going to start by singing come to the altar would you come to the altar and then we're gonna sing a second song I want you to spend at least the whole first song pray and then the second song we're gonna sing that's called waymaker because that is who is in a place where we cannot see away he can make a way let me pray for us our good and gracious Heavenly Father God we love you like crazy God we thank you that we can love you because you first loved us god I pray for the marriages the church of 11:22 God I pray for the husbands and the wives god I pray for those that are have been divorced or going through divorce lord I pray that your words would convict where they need to convict but they would comfort where we need to be comforted and your word does not condemn so I pray against the lies of the enemy that would begin to whisper condemnation as if we are unwanted because the reality is our bodies are not our own we were bought at a price that you sent your son Jesus to declare that we are wanted god I pray that we would walk in that freedom we prayed in Jesus name Amen so would you please stand as we respond we're gonna sing two songs you're gonna pray right where you are we're gonna bring our tithes and our offerings for the Advancement of the kingdom how are you learning broken within oh by the weight of you see Jesus is calling have you come to the end of yourself do you thirst for a drink from the where Jesus is calling him calling to the [Music] Czar's [Music] whose bar we specialized Jesus [Music] Phoebe I know Chris state holiday there's no Jesus is calling sorrows trading joy yeah she is Jesus is calm [Music] [Applause] [Music] for mercy isn't he wonderful sing halleluh christ is risen bow down before for a single Christ is a reason see [Music] see come to the altar ah arms are open wide forgiveness was born with [Music] [Music] moving in I worship you yeah working in I worship you I love you moving in our mist I worship you you you are here working in this place I worship you [Music] keep lying in the darkness my god that is who mirakl promise keep light in the darkness my god [Music] you are in touching every [Music] you [Music] [Music] [Applause] [Music] you see miss out even when even when I don't see you too even when I don't feel it your kin you never stop you never stop lurking you never stop and never stop working I don't see it sure even when I don't feel it you're kidding either stop you'd better stop me give me the stuff [Applause] [Music] thank you for worshiping Jesus with us we're praying that you heard the message God had for you today we want to encourage you to not lose hope if you find yourself in a hard situation because if the tomb is empty then anything is possible as you saw earlier in the service our marriage now is a testimony to what Jesus can do when you simply surrender to him if you want additional resources that could help your marriage visit Co e2 to calm slash best sermon ever to learn more also a baptism class is starting right now so join in at CoA to to.com slash baptism next week pastor joe b will continue our series best sermon ever where we're studying the Sermon on the mountain verse by verse remember if the tomb is empty anything is possible we can't wait to see you next week be free [Music]

Channel: The Church of Eleven22

Views: 4,862

Rating: 4.7837839 out of 5

Keywords:

Id: Uthezm6JiqE

Length: 87min 47sec (5267 seconds)

Published: Thu May 07 2020