Ask Dr Winston | Covenant Marriage Pt. 5

hello this is Bill Winston thank you for sending in your questions to ask dr. Winston I trust that you've been blessed with the answers that we have been given up to this point and they are solely based now on the Word of God I'm not trying to be politically correct in this I'm going with what God said so today I want to continue to answer a few more questions let's pray father we come before you in Jesus name thank you for this time together that we can hear the wisdom of God we ask father by the Spirit of God that you speak to each and every one of us about answers and things that we need to know or we need to get answers for and we ask Lord that those answers bring peace and joy now father we thank you for it and thank you for the wisdom of God in Jesus name Amen praise God here's a foundation scripture now it says over in Psalm chapter 11 verse 3 if the Foundation's be destroyed what can the righteous do if the Foundation's be destroyed what can the righteous do now he talks about the foundations talking about what you build on and you have to understand that a lot that's going on in this world is a result of a fallen man existence it's a result of Adam who sinned in the beginning and as a result of that he and Eve they got put out of the garden now they're struggling for life now the enemy comes in because he's now becoming the ruler over all this earth and now he's setting up his system his kingdom his ways of doing things so that's the way that the world pretty much has been run and that's today you see things happening in the world you see people marrying people against what it considers the Word of God or whatever we do or have done and and that is not necessarily right now what God is giving us is what's right and that's why it says seek ye first the kingdom of God and His righteousness what's right and so what's right are the things in the Word of God so God uses this word of God to correct each one of us and the word is profitable and it's for correction in in in and whatever have you and so what we do is use this as our guide so if some of this does not agree with what you think then go back to the Word of God because God made you you didn't make God so if God made you basically he knows how you may he knows how you supposed to function and and so forth and I know I was talking to some in in one of our service elves talking about the discipling and disciplining a child and how that child could be there's a child could be spanked or her child does something and I know when I was young the teacher used to spank my hand and so forth like that well that's a form of discipline as a child gets older of course a teenager you can't do that you now start taking away privileges and that's the way you discipline a child but the Bible talks about the fact that if a person loves their child their discipline their child some kind of way and somebody well I don't believe in that so forth and so I'm not concerned with what you believe in I'm concerned with one thing because he made us we didn't make him he is the Potter weird the clay and so he made us and he knows how we function and plus a fact the Bible said if you do it God's Way he'll manifest himself that means you'll see the results of it according to how God planned it he said over in John chapter 14 verse 21 that he that has my Commandments and keeps them it's he that loves me and he did loves me shall be loved my father and I love him and I'll manifest myself to him nobody likes discipline nobody whether you're giving it unless some people just you know they just feed on something like that but normally people don't they hate to take away privileges from from a teenager they I mean it's admit my teacher used to say this this is gonna hurt me worse than it's gonna hurt you I should I doubt that but but my point to you is is that the kids may come back oh you know I hate you you know you're not gonna let me use the car I hate well all that's emotion just yet be prepared for it well let's see motion but notice what you're doing your training up a leader you're training up somebody that won't go to jail when they get older and that's what you're in for you're in for the long run not for that particular night so remember that that the foundations if they be destroyed what can the righteous do nothing because they're not following the foundation of the Lord well let's read one of our questions see what it says my husband's family has caused nothing but negative energy in our marriage I'm feeling as though I'm tired of this constant struggle what should I do oh one of the things you're gonna do is make sure that you and your husband are 1 in terms of when a person gets married the Bible says well let's let's let's talk about it here over here in Genesis in chapter 2 it talks about the marriage it says in in Genesis chapter 2 verse 22 and the river which the Lord God had taken from man made he a woman and brought her into the man and Adam said now this is bone of my bones and flesh of my flesh and he shall be called she shall be called woman because she was taken out of the man and therefore shall a man leave his father and mother and shall cleave to his wife and they shall be one flesh so one of the things that you have to do sometimes is you have to pray sometimes that men don't they don't leave their father and their mother in other words this is still a mama's boy and so what happens you have to pray and and sometimes mother and dad Zev Oh mom has moved in with him with whatever have you if that is causing strife or division and whatever things that are going on in a house then you have to look for another place for them to live you're not dumping anybody you're trying to bring peace to your home and run the family as God had planned for it to be run so sometimes in that you have to pray that that ungodly soul tie there be broken because it still an umbilical they're running that that keeps the mother making the decisions for the family or for him and that is not the way it should be and that's what you've got sometimes today especially when you have these families that have no father and the mother has been such a force in this lives of raising this son or whoever have you and so you have to pray and that umbilical can be broken through prayer and God will do it like I said no you a marriage includes God in lanza what happens to people and they forget God and they go and listen at some psychological handbook that tell him how to run a marriage and that particular person probably doesn't even fully believe in marriage in principles of marriage so my point to you is is that's the first thing I would do the next thing I would do is understand my own feelings and that may I bring maybe I'm bringing some baggage to the relationship as well and when I say that that we you supposed to be one you're supposed to be single you're supposed to be whole and when I say that Adam didn't really even know he needed a wife it was God's idea to get out of my wife so my point to you is is that this wholeness is where a lot of people miss it because what happens is they've had a lot of experiences in their past that have fractured their hearts or give them some kind of thinking that is not of God or maybe some bitterness has been in there and deep-rooted and so forth like that and soon they get married some of this stuff starts coming out especially when the pressure gets on money pressures so forth and so on it start calling names you know guys it's that well where was it it was in their heart and so what happens is we have to now understand and what I'm teaching on at right now in the Sunday's lesson on the fruit of the Spirit which is found in Galatians in chapter 5 and verse 22 and 23 now the fruit of the Spirit is love joy peace now what do these fruit do once you get born again God deposits the love of God in your heart by the Holy Ghost now that love has love forces the forces of patience and enforces of kindness and gentleness and in self-control or prints all those forces are in the heart now what are those forces designed to do those forces are designed to subdue the flesh when it gets out of control that's what they're designed to do now you have to choose them of course you can God always leaves you with a choice you'd say well I'm gonna go off on this guy though that's forgiveness later you know well no that's not the way to do it there's one guy on the phone this guy he said he said this other guy I'm going down there and I'm gonna I'm gonna beat him you do that he said well I'm just tired of it I'll ask forgiveness later but I won't beat him now well that's not the way to do that you can choose the right way right now God always leaves you with a choice and let the spiritual force coming out of your heart subdue the flesh remember one of the things about a spiritual force is a spiritual force with controlled physical things that's what it's designed to do it controls physical things and that was one boy I remember brought to a pastor who's a friend of mine and he's brought by by this this evangelist know what happened the evangelist was in town and the pastor had a son the son was kind of rebellious and his son who was there at the meeting that day was a daytime meeting and this particularly evangelist powerful men of God and he brought the pastor brought his son so I want to introduce my son to you he introduced his son and the son was you know looking kind of you know just shoveled like he was you know kind of living in the streets of whatever and the the evangelists took his hand said well hello I'm I'm glad to meet you what what is your name again pronounce you first name and and his son tried to open his mouth and couldn't and he said what is your name he tried to open his mouth again and nothing came out and he asked him again and nothing came out I'm talking about the Holy Ghost I shut his mouth the son immediately start crying and gave his life to the Lord turn him around right away look at the power of the Spirit of God and I'm just saying a lot of times we don't go back to the book we don't go back to God and how God is so powerful you can turn your son around he's so powerful you can save people that are in jail Casa r18 it's so powerful he can get your husband to think new thoughts and give him one dream and a lot of times what we don't do is fall back on God and it unreason wise because the flesh is ruling there's there's no teaching about the fact that you got a spiritual power inside of you that could subdue that and no teaching on that so what we do we're victims instead of Victor's and so I'm saying here in this situation one what should I do one it's make sure that the tie between the husband and the mother is not at this point an unguided an ungodly state in other words the mother has that she has to say so over the son instead of the Sun now cleaving to his wife and makes you also that whoever the wife is make sure that there's a patient's inside of that because that's one of the forces and enforce a patient and that you can pray the right prayers and God will hear those prayers because my wife if I do something and say make a decision that she this doesn't feel is right she won't even argue with me she'll go to the Lord why because the head of every man is Christ so she goes to my boss my head and she goes to my head my head if he has to talk to me in the dream he does I come back to her in a couple of days the baby you know I believe you were right on that thing you don't mean humble pot now praise God I don't know whether you've tasted that before some good pot didn't but the point of it is is that God has a way out for any situation we found that over in first Corinthians and over in 1st Corinthians in Chapter chapter 10 in 1st Corinthians chapter 10 he says this he says in verse 13 there has no temptation taken you but such as common to man but God is faithful who will not suffer you to be tempted above that you are able but with the temptation make a way to escape that you may be able to bear it now I put in my Bible God will never let you face anything you cannot overcome if you just remember that you'll never faced anything that you cannot overcome as a believer you'll never faced anything that you cannot overcome God will always leave your way of escape so his way is going to be found by faith if you're not in faith forget finding it finding the right door just go back over in the faith how does faith come it's only one source of the faith of faith and that's the Word of God so go and start reading the Word of God - it's your faith built a cup you'll see the way out boom you'll know what to pray and God then can pray with you get a prayer partner - that helps sometimes you have a person you can pray with sometimes that that where the one stick of dynamite won't do it you can wrap two together and the whole wall or blow down and things will come back in line alright question number two when praying for your marriage and the man has left the house do you still treat him like the head of the household that's that's a decision really that you have to make with you and God the Holy Spirit and let him help you with that answer because there could be an arrangement that could be made that man has left the house because he's trying to deal with some things or there's an agreement between that couple that something needs to be gotten that needs to be something that needs to be straightened out in terms of their emotions and so forth and maybe it's he is saying it's better for the kids that I leave the house or whatever have you not leaving the house because I'm going to another woman or anything like that but trying to solve a problem and that's the best way that person knows to solvent and then because they left a house well he's going I'm gonna go out and buy me a car you know well wait wait a second now it depends on the arrangements that have been made so I would ask you to ask the Holy Spirit's matter of fact I'll pray right now father I pray for this person who's sent in this particular question I pray that you speak to her heart and share with her give her guidance has exactly what to do in this situation father I pray also now whatever schism there is between them in this marriage that had be broken that whatever devil has got to got me into this situation that he'd be cashed out now whatever work that needs to be done in the hearts of these two will be done that they can have peace and love and come together again father I thank you for it in Jesus name Amen all right let's try another one I'm reading on social media that people think marriage as we know it is dead what do you think oh I'll tell you this is what I want to do this way I would challenge you not what we think what does God think he made us we make it right I don't care what we think if if you ask people what they think they'll try to be politically correct in certain environments as well you know I just depends on what you think well hey there's only one thing that's right you can think a lot of things but there's only that one thing is right God put one man one woman and that's marriage marriage is not between two same-sex couples that is not what God says is marriage now that may be what the world sees is marriage and they make condone that but they're not in here there are three groups of people in the Bible one the Jew the Gentile and the Church of God three people three right three we can call them races if you will of people because when you get born again your new race Jew Gentile Word of God so they may do those things marry those people and so forth I still don't sanction that why cuz it's not biblical it's not biblical now do I hate folk no I don't hate them churches plates for all kinds of people that make any difference but my point to you is is what is a marriage marriage is is this holy coming together that is ratified by God between one man and one woman a bunch of women I've still got one woman that's what it is right that's what the Bible says now this is what I'm gonna preach don't ask me what I think I'm not thinking and I'm only saying what God says and if I say what God says God's gonna bless me in that so that's what I want so my point to you is no hate hate is not in here that is not what the Christian does come people how I hate them because it no no no no no I love them the Bible says which holds the love your brother and you're supposed to love your enemy yeah that's what I'm doing that's not a feeling that's a person love is a person it's God God loves everybody how you following them saying but I did a whole lot of things when I wasn't saved that right now I'm trying to figure out how did I do that well I did it because I didn't have any knowledge the first thing he gave Adam so that the devil couldn't get into his life was knowledge the first thing cuz the devil to tell you do with something anything so I'm only trying to state what the Bible says is right and let's go by the foundation that God has set up in the scriptures and understand that you have the church and you have the world in the world has their standards in the church has their standards and in the church is one man one woman and that's the way they get married oh you follow all right praise God now let's go to the next one now understand that when I say this and talk about these particular scriptures you have to understand that I'm not being politically politically correct I am a pastor and an apostle and I go by the Word of God and that's all I go by I'm not trying to be favorites with one group and and friends with the Republicans and out with the Democrats and so forth no no no mine is a kingdom agenda it's a it's higher than any of those it's a kingdom agenda to let God's kingdom come in this earth that's what I'm here for praise God now they're right on a certain point and I'm with that point they're right on a certain time with that point but mine is a kingdom agenda praise God all right how do you feel about gay marriage how do you witness to those that think their Christian and are going to church well this is the issue that's coming up today in terms of of marriage in a person's choice of lifestyle there is specific scripture in the Bible that talks about the lifestyle that a believer should have and the lifestyle that a believer should have is a lifestyle that is conducive to their particular gen I mean this is what the Bible talks about some people don't get married then and if Apostle Paul says it's better not to get married but he said it better to marry than to burn in other words if a person is just Tom in it with thoughts of of whatever going on sexually and so forth it's better to marry than to burn but he is talking about specifically in terms of people having relationships with people of the same sex the Bible forbid says and that is what the Bible says so I'm not going any further than the Bible that's what it says you can read about it in Romans chapter 1 he talks about it over in 1st Corinthians he talks about it and so forth because these things were back there in Paul's day it's nothing new Under the Sun so that's what I think I'm I don't hate anybody I want people to come to our church but I tell you if they come I'm gonna give them the Word of God and do all I can if they're sick I'm gonna try to get them delivered if they're thinking the wrong way I would try to get them the right way and so forth that's one so that's my job praise God next question how is the best way that you can prepare yourself for a future wife one of the best ways I think is to if your church has a a premarital course to go through that course another thing is to get books or information on preparing for in this particular case the future wife prepare for a wife I find that the best thing that men should do is they should really get their minds renewed from a street mentality I think a man has an ego and I think when he gets born again he still has it but it's sanctified and that if a man now can come into understanding that that you know he still wanted to provide he still wants to be if you will head of the home a head of something and so forth as well those are things that are a Nate inside of him he still wants to be the leader a teacher of the home so forth and so on those things are inside of that person but having to them to know that hey I have to love my wife I have to treat her as I say like a queen I have to make sure that that she her feelings are considered in whatever I do you know in terms of making sure that I'm spending enough time not playing tennis but sometimes with her and and we going out together whatever have you a woman likes the idea to be cuddled and to be they man is very visual a woman goes a lot by a sense of having a man to respond to her needs emotionally and so forth like that and I'm saying that you just studied the difference between a man and a woman because the biggest thing a man has to learn is he's no longer in the streets you no longer out there hunting looking for somebody and going to parties and having relationships and breaking up and so forth now this is gonna be forever and then the other thing is to learn how children ought to be raised because that husband's going to be responsible for it and learn how their to be raised so you can actually start out when a child is very young raising the child the right way now I'm saying we all make mistakes and as we do thank God that we have a god that's merciful the Oh forgive us and also you can straighten out some of the mess they've caused and it's never too late if a person's breathing it's never too late and so forth but you want to raise him up what was one of the biggest things you want to have in a family or the child in a relationship is integrity you really do because I think that integrity will determine how far a relationship will go is a sad thing to have a lifestyle that a person wasn't faithful and so forth and all of a sudden to be discovered when they get older and bigger and and so forth and so on and so what I would do the best way that I could prepare myself for a future wife is to prepare myself is to really really think about what kind project myself what kind of husband what kind of father I would want to be and tell you this as we married people sometimes there are things in them things in us that don't even come out until marriage time well now you got to get the fruit of the Spirit again you got to get this thing and try to fix it and try to make it show so that these things in our lives are as God wanted them that God wants them to be has in other words we've been purged out of all the hurts and deep hurts and and all the unforgiveness and things that might be in our hearts because we want to be able to give our spouse the best and so that's where we are number six and do you have prayers for love that has survived divorce I'm not sure I really understand that particular question prayers for love that has survived divorce III think that if if if if you're looking for a type of prayer that a person won't enter into a divorce we have some prayers like that and buy a book on their book on a divorce or divorce and remarriage or whatever have you there are books on that and you can can buy those books sure Christian books on that and they're very good I've seen some of them let me just read that one more before we close out here I'm not sure I fully understand that that particular question let's see one more here is it forbidden to marry after a failed marriage yes you can marry after a failed marriage and one of the reasons why you can is because Paul talks about it he says if the unbeliever departs let him depart then you're free meaning that you're free to remarry again now I know there are some situations here that that a person are not circumstances that a person should be divorced under but when because of the sin of Adam because of the things that men and women have gone through today all kinds of things are happening and that's why you got this big first John 1:9 that if you confess your sins he's faithful and just to forgive them and cleanse you from all unrighteousness and I'm telling you there's your loving God and and wanting to do what he says but for some reason don't have enough strength and that marriage didn't work out and so forth like that God doesn't plan for you to carry that around he plans for you if you're not born again get born again and in going again remember the woman who in John chapter the Gospel of John chapter 4 and the Bible says Jesus said to her you've been married five times and the one that you're married and when did you're living with now is not even your husband now that's kind of interesting but he made an evangelist out of this woman what did it say it says that God will do will still use people and can use people as if they have been married let's say two or three times they've they've not it not worked out and and for some reason they have feeling all guilty and ashamed and so forth like that you come into this Kingdom I'm telling you he'll straighten everything out you'll make it so that this six marriage will last forever God will make it that way I'm saying don't be too hard on yourself you've got a god that is so powerful no we don't advocate divorce but God miles says God hates divorce but he made it so because he realized to send for condition that mankind was in and no so God understands that Jesus the Bible says was touched with the feelings of our infirmities in other words he went through everything and the feelings of everything that humanity would go through why because now he's at the right hand of the father making intercession for us the Bible says he was touch with him so he could be a faithful high priest he could pray for us on those situations so it might be a situation you get divorced and God wants to bring that divorce situation back together you both have discovered Jesus and and find found out that the weakness and so forth you want to bring it back together it might be that the person whose divorce have been married again divorced why why did they get divorced the second time because the same thing was in him that was in him the first time and God knew that and in the third time so forth and then next thing they get born again heart gets cleaned out now they get married and stay married for fifty years I'm talking about that's what it's all about remember we serve a merciful God and if he weren't merciful none of us would be here you're not wonderful well we appreciate receiving many of your questions and I'll be responding periodically so keep sending in your questions through social media using hashtag ask dr. Winston and on a Facebook page Living Word Christian Center or on our website bill Winston org so remember now god loves you no matter who you are no matter what how you've messed up how you are right now God still loves you and he wants to bring you to himself in the way that he does that is true love so thank you for submitting your questions this is dr. bill Winston and keep walking by Faith

Channel: Living Word Christian Center

Views: 9,848

Rating: 4.9104476 out of 5

Keywords: Living Word Christian Center, Bill Winston Ministries, Ask Dr. Winston, #AskDrWinston, Marriage, Covenant, Marriage Counseling, Divorce, Children, Marriage and the Family

Id: qRZ_gxXPAg4

Length: 29min 49sec (1789 seconds)

Published: Thu Aug 20 2015