American Dad: Roger’s Best Personas (Mashup) | TBS

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I love that this over an hour+ mashup is actually from the TBS channel.

👍︎︎ 2 👤︎︎ u/redxstrike 📅︎︎ Feb 06 2021 🗫︎ replies
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Wheels, may I speak with you? Papa Wheelie, why don't you go fill out your HR forms? Teddy Bonkers will help you. The-- the Teddy bear? Teddy bear? His name is Theodore Bonkers. He's not the smartest guy, but he tries harder than anyone I've ever met. And I've met Ed Burns. Go talk to him. Just go with it. What the hell, Wheels? He was so excited. I couldn't let him down! It says "list previous work experience or draw a picture of a cowboy." I can't draw a cowboy. Is a pirate acceptable? Yes. [playing piano] Well, I tried this thing in every lock in the old man's house. This opens nothing. Listen, Wheels. The grandfather may have left a clue in this piano. Why is that, leg man? 'Cause it's out of key. A clue would have been grand. In the sand. You made me stop laughing. Well, at least you're good for something. What is this? It's coffee. I only drink flaming Gran Marnier. I'm sorry. I didn't know. Bonkers said to bring coffee. You're a liability! You know what your problem is? Papa Wheelie doesn't have a backstory. All right? All you have is a prop. How did you end up on that unicycle? Are you a hipster? Are you a Frenchman? Were you raised by a Russian circus bear? You don't know! You just woke up one morning and saw a unicycle, you stupid hack! I don't know about you, but this case has put me in the mood for some cocaine. Oh, I get that joke. Because cocaine comes in keys, right? Leg man doesn't joke about cocaine. Cocaine is not a joking matter. The teacher here is supposed to be the most intense and demanding instructor in all of clowning. And shit, it's Roger, isn't it? It's gonna be Roger. All right, jag offs, the name's HJ Rimmens. Look to your left, look to your right. By the end of the semester, 60% of you will be dead by your own hand. The rest will be clowns. You dig? OK, I'm out of here. Hah. I'm-- I'm a little confused, because you said here on your application you wanted to be a clown. More than anything. So what's your gooch? "Gooch" is horn corn for clown name. "Horn corn" his horn corn for clown lingo. Gonna be honking a lot of horn corn around here, you dig? So what's your gooch, kid? Dimples. Dimples? Pretty buckety gooch, don't you think? More horn corn. Relax, just sliding your whistle. Why don't you show us what you got? I-- uh-- Come on, man. No pressure. Just lay a little jape on these cats. Whatever you got. No big. [music playing] [farts] Fart was a nice touch. Smells, too. Ladies and gentlemen, we could be looking at the next Emmett Kelly-- of sucking. Oh! That's right, you nut-licking little turds. I ain't here to hold your hands. I'm here to play mind games and emotionally abuse you into being clowns! That's clowning, you shitheads! ANNOUNCER: Justice hunter, philanthropist, has a Gmail account, this is News Glance with Genevieve Vavance. Been a tough day for all of us here at the Glance. Steve Smith has now been missing for 36 hours. I'm joined by some of Steve's classmates. You look like the type of girls who do a lot of regrettable things. How does it feel today, knowing you'll probably never get to hit that? Sad. Steve was really cute. I guess I just wish I could have hit that. It's so important to have sex with people before they go missing. Mm-hmm. All those girls want me? Awesome! The longer I stay in this cabin, the more laid I'm gonna get! Yeah. More volume! I want it super big! You're doing a great job. I know I'm demanding, but I'm working on it. But it also got me where I am today. So when I ask you to make it super big, I mean make it super big, I will murder you! I'm sorry. Work in progress. God is not finished with this gal. Hey, Genevieve. I'm all set to do my story on Garbage Island. Yeah, yeah, yeah. We'll get to it. But first I got an exclusive with the parents. Wait, what? And we're back. I'm here tonight with Stan and Francine Smith, heartbroken parents of America's missing son, Steve Smith. Stan, Francine, why did you murder your son? What? Not ready to confess? Let's look at some statistics. 100% of the time a child goes missing, the parents did it. ANNOUNCER: Legally not a fact. What are you talking about? And where did you hide the body? We didn't hide the body! So you admit there's a body! Why are you doing this? I'm sorry. It's been a long week. Emotions are running wild. Can I get you something? A beer water, perhaps? - No thanks. That stuff gives me diarrhea. Stan, are you close with your son? No, but that doesn't mean I murdered him! Interesting. Can we play that back? I murdered him. You son of a bitch! Ugh! We have to take a break. ANNOUNCER: Beer Water, it won't give you diarrhea. Just keep it natural. You guys are doing great. You're coming off super likable. Francine, how many times did you stab your son? - None! - Huh. Well, my team and I created a reenactment of what we believe happened the night Steve disappeared. You know what I've been thinking about lately? How Steve is the worst? Yes, I kind of want to murder him. Great idea. We'll use my knife. Hi, Mom. Hi, Dad. Just coming in here to love you. [dramatic organ music playing] I forgive you. [laughter] Gruesome stuff. Can you two stick around for my next guest? Yeah? Well, please welcome Officer Keith Benson. What? Stan and Francine Smith, you are under arrest for the murder of your son. What the hell? We didn't kill him! We love our son! Wait, officer, please! You're making a mistake! Tragic. After the break, bulimia, bad for you, but is it good for your toilet? Find out tonight at 11:00. What is your drink, sir? Beer, shaken, not stirred. Hey, handsome. Got a light? Looks like you got yourself a cigarette there. I'm Sex Pun To Come. I get a good feeling from you. Do you get a good feeling from-- Are you a whore? I mean, it's cool if you're a whore, but know right now, I don't get with no whore! Another Martini for Tear Jerker. Good evening, Tear Jerker. Smith, Stan Smith. Didn't really ask who you were, but OK. I'd like an invitation to your spa! I only invite celebrities. Well, perhaps I can play you for an invitation. Name your game. OK, baccarat. Yeah, I don't know how to play that. OK, then craps. Yeah, I don't get that, either. I mean, seven's good, but then seven's not good? How do you play the horn? Then they get mad at me. OK, OK. Perhaps you should name your game. But I must warn you, I never lose. OK, let's play highest number. I'm not familiar with it. Whoever says the highest number wins. You go first. Thank you. 6,000. 17,000. Well played. I guess I'll see you on the Teardrop Islands. Did you get it? Yes, baby. I trust you'll enjoy my spa, Mr. Stan Smith of the CIA. In fact, you'll like it so much, you'll never leave. [laughter] [burps] Oh my god. You smell that? I had a pickle an hour ago. Came with my reuben. I'm so fat. And filthy rich in 3, 2-- manager guy, Luke sexually harassed me! It was horrible. He wouldn't stop. I deserve money. Well, this is very serious, Laura. Marjorie, could you please send in Luke Fondleberg. Up, just got my period. Damn uterus, refreshing itself every month like it owns the joint. You wanted to see me? Fondleberg, did you sexually harass Miss Vander Boobe. You bet your ass I did. I harassed the crap out of her. Damn it. Now we have to pay her a settlement. You're fired! Both of those things work for me. See you in hell. False alarm. It turns out I just had to poop. What did Luke say? Well, he admitted he harassed you. I'm still reeling. Let's talk settlement. I'm thinking $1 million. Actually, our lawyers have determined that juries pay a larger settlement to women who are more attractive. So with that in mind, this is our offer. Unharassable, huh? Well, this juicy settlement says otherwise. Wow, $90,000. I know. Respectable, right? Ja, ja, completely respectable. Wow, that's a lot of money. So can you, I don't know, loan me a couple of G's? Oh, no. No, I'm sorry. I have a policy. I never loan friends money. Oh, OK. But I'm good for it. - No, I know. It's not about that. It's just a rule I have. I got in a situation a few years ago. It got really ugly. So I just decided. OK, I'm sorry I asked. I am, too. Frankly. [laughter] Wow. Really thought we were gearing up for a much more satisfying chase. But this? Roger, I'll kill you! I'm not Roger. I'm the phantom! Roger? Well, yeah, who did you-- what? Well, anyway, you'll never stop me! There you go again, stealing my idea. Well, until tell you tell the family this telethon was my idea, I've got havoc to wreak. Wreck? Wreak. It ends now! Hah. You can't stop the Phantom. These riggings and catwalks are my domain, and I am their master! [screaming] Ugh. Ugh. [screaming] All right, all right, I give up. But it doesn't matter. I've already destroyed this telethon, and untied your bowtie. No, you've given me a relaxed demeanor! Oh my god, is that a bomb? You planted a bomb? What the hell are you talking about? That's enough C4 to blow up this entire building. Disarm it! Stan, it's not mine. All I did was change the teleprompter, cut the bear's brakes, release the terrorist, drop a fishing boat on Jeff Fisher. Wait, you released the terrorist? He's an explosives expert. We'll never be able to disarm it. Oh my god! Stan, I know exactly what to do. Put me down. [playing piano] Let's try that on the fart setting. [farting] I don't know. It's funnier, but I think it takes out some of the tension. [laughter] You're done with dinner? Let's sign the truck and get out of here. Calm down, Stan. I'm still talking to my new friends, King Harald of Norway and his wife, Queen Sonja. Now, the freeways in Dallas are horrible. Just take a taxi from the airport. Take taxis everywhere. And head straight for Bud's Tex-Mex. Don't bring your wife. The bathroom scene there is amazing. Eh? Now you tell me something good. Oh, yum, dessert. This is wonderful. Best tiramisu I've ever had. [sighing] Maybe too much rum. [gunshot] OK, dinner is over Roger. Here's the bill. Just sign it to the room. Yeah, I just wanna make sure I didn't accidentally leave a tip. No! What is this, Stan? You used me, just like you always do. Look, we can talk about it on the plane ride home. Right now we gotta fake your assassination and drop the general's body in your place. Here, put on these squibs. I truly thought you wanted to go on a friends vacation with me. Actually, what I really wanted was this. An aerial screw? Yup. Now, be a trooper, go out on that balcony, and get shot 15 times in the chest. [sighs] [cheering] [beep] [screaming] I'm OK! [confused murmuring] What the hell are you doing? I'm staying here and running this dump, that's what. Guards, see that Se or Smith leaves my country immediately. I hope your helicopter was worth it, because it cost us our friendship. The prosecution would now like to call Mr. Sugar to the stand. Guess who's the luckiest guy in the courtroom. Burt, because he gets to watch my big round ass as I walk to the stand. [laughter] Mr. Sugar, how do you explain this photo of you with illegal employees and counterfeit merchandise? [gasping] You know what's not counterfeit in that photo? My emotions. Aw. OK. I don't know what that means. But here you are accepting a cash payment for the fake handbags. Do you admit that this is you? I will, if you admit this is you. Why? How did you? Look how happy you are. Ladies and gentlemen of the jury, don't they make a great couple? [applause] God, she looked good before the baby. Mr. Sugar made us work very hard. When we weren't sewing handbags, he made us sleep on the floor. [murmuring] Inez, thank you. Inez, does the date September 19th mean anything to you? Es mi cumplea os. In English, please. It is my birthday. Can you tell me what this is, Inez? It is the bear you gave me for my birthday. Aw. So if I was the monster the prosecution is trying to portray me as, would I have given you such a wonderful birthday present? No. In English, please. No. Martin sugar rests, y'all. [laughter] Oh, yeah. We can write a porno, right? We can totally do this. HP's a dunce. Sure, he has a good eye for casting black men, but what does he know about story? Bupkis! OK, porn scenario. Think, Steve. Think. It's not just gonna fall into our laps. How's it going, guys? Where's my sandwich? Coming right up. I just wanted to introduce you to my friend, Sandy. She's new here, completely inexperienced but eager to learn. You might say I'm a virgin at this. [giggling] I didn't order your life story. I ordered a tuna melt. Why is it so hot in here? Oh my god, we're so sorry, guys. The air conditioning broke. We'll fix it right away. If there's anything else you need, anything, just call us. And I mean anything. What's wrong with you? You get $1 every time you say the word "anything"? [giggling] I got it. Steve, start typing. Exterior, Costa Mesa, day. Need a hand with that? Who are you? My husband's away on business. I'm the pool boy/pizza guy. I'm here to check your pH balance, and deliver the sausage you ordered. What the hell? That's the crap HP hated. It's not modern or real. Were you even listening? I was the pool boy and the pizza guy. If demonstrating that the working poor need two jobs just to make ends meet isn't modern or real, then I don't know what the hell is! All right, listen up. There's a new renegade in town, and he's hungry for gating. Now, who has an injustice? Well, there is a local biker gang that's been terrorizing us. Well, not anymore. Something to eat? Thought I'd finish up these fries. Those are cold. I'm a renegade. I like my fries cold and my beers smoking hot. [gasping] That's them. Are-- are you sure? I can't renegade unless you're 100% sure. I'm sure. I'm sure. It sounds like you're saying "unsure". Ugh! You picked the wrong day to come in here. We got us a renegade! Fries are so good! Who's the renegade? This guy? Please, sir, help us! Fries, fries, fries, fries, fries! [screaming] You promised to help us. You're a coward. Would a coward do this? NARRATOR: Renegade. Yep, I remember when Stan came to me months ago and asked me to plan the whole thing. Right, Stan? Yes. Great, just cut me that check for $6,800, the budget we agreed upon, and I'll get started. $6,800? Oh, Stan, I'm so lucky to be married to such a good provider. Just make it out to Jeannie Gold Weddings. Who's that? Jeannie Gold, wedding planner. This is my emergency wedding kit, everything you need for last minute snafus. Needle and thread, band aids for sore heels, fake hymens for those not so well behaved Middle Eastern brides. These beauties are packed full of ox blood. Trust me, that bedroom will look like the set of a Wes Craven movie the next morning. You must be the children. Jeannie Gold. I wanted to discuss the gift you're buying your parents for their anniversary. I'm just gonna get 'em a card. Sign my name to it, "forever Yours, S." They'll know. You'll do better than a card. It's their 20th. China is the traditional gift. Leave us alone, Roger. Mm-hmm, mm-hmm. Now, find a meaningful gift. Disappoint me, and next time you'll be dealing Valik. Who? Listen to Jeannie, or I cut you! Two weeks from today, Francine, you will be here walking down the aisle. I've created the menu, the flowers. I even have a string quartet playing the score from "Room with a View". We didn't have that at our wedding. After your reception, when you and Stan drove away in the limo, you heard a song playing from a third story window. You didn't know what it was, but secretly wished you had walked down the aisle to it. How did you-- I never shared that with anyone. Last Wednesday, when you were in the bath, I snuck up and ethered you good. While in your twilight state, you admitted your regret. You hummed that song for me. I had a top musicologist beside me, and he identified it. He saw me naked? Honey, please, he's a musicologist. He sees it every day. Here's the number of my tailor. He can let your wedding dress out. Oh, I don't need to. It still fits. Really? Look at you. She is just beautiful. That's the reason I married her. Well, that's not the only reason. Yes, it is. There was nothing else? Nope. Just my appearance? That is correct. Wh-- what he means is, your beauty emanates from within. No, I don't. You know, I'm not so sure I want to renew vows with-- Don't give up on this, Francine. There were good times. Think back. He must have done something to show his love was true. [burps] Ignore that. Steak-umms. Well, two weeks before our wedding, Stan and I agreed not to see each other. At the ceremony, when I stepped out of the limo, he ran to me, picked me up and swung me around, and told me he never wanted to be away from me again. But now I realize he only loved me for my looks. What? He was joking. Stan, tell her. Oh, yeah. Of course, I was joking. I love you for more than your looks. You have no sense of humor. Good thing you're pretty! Oh, another joke. Shut up, Stan. You're too funny. OK, here's what we're gonna do. Just like before, you won't see each other for two weeks. Then we'll recreate your reunion at the wedding. I'll film the whole thing and make it an extra on the DVD, along with the musicologist touching you in the bath. I'm kidding. At least I think I'm kidding. I left him alone with her for a half hour while I took a nap. What do you say, honey? OK, Roger. Let's do it. It's still on! I'm Jeannie Gold, wedding planner extraordinaire. And a survivor. He'll see you in two weeks, just like before. Mwah. I gotta hand it to you, you're doing a great job. - Are you hitting on me? - What? This happens all the time. I will not let you ruin your wedding. I will give you a handy, Jay, to keep you out of trouble. [whistling] Hoffman! And a good day to you, Mr. McCreery. In my office, now! You're familiar with the first line of Genesis, Right Well, I should say I am, sir. I should say I am. Does this sound right? "In the beginning, God created the heavens and a transvestite who pooped mozzarella dinosaurs." Blasphemy! Cut the act, Hoffman. I know you came in last night, and edited the Bible from your computer. Sir, I would never tamper with the Word of the Lord. 1,000 copies ruined! You're fired! Rudy tudy fresh and fruity, I'm in a pile of doody! What-- what? what's-- what's going on? Roger, we have to talk. This family has a problem. Oh, finally we can get this all out in the open. I'll start. Klaus, you're useless and everyone hates you. [gasping] No, Roger. This is about you. The last two months, your selfish behavior has gotten out of control. Stan, tell him. Well, for starters, you constantly raid the fridge and drink all my Five Alive. You take our clothes without asking and then disappear all day, so you can run around as one of your ridiculous personas. I regret my dance card is filled for the evening, but that's always the spring cotillion. I'll tell you what I think. I think you hide behind all these disguises so you don't have to face the fact that the real you is an inconsiderate jerk! Yeah, it doesn't matter how you treat people when you can blame it on Professor Edelstein, or AT&T operator Shalanda Dykes. Speaking of which, that credit for my friends and family plan still hasn't shown up on my bill. That credit was generated after your last statement. It'll show up on your next bill. Oh, OK. Thank you. Thank you for choosing AT&T. Enough. You have been treating us like doormats for months, and we're sick and tired of it! Wow, I hear you. I hear you loud and clear. And I guess all I can say is, eat my dust! He's getting away! [snoring] For God's sake, Roger, get up! My tequila! That worm had a name! Now, if you will excuse me, I am late for my daughter's arranged wedding. She will learn to love him. [door slams] Well, that was a waste of time. Thanks for agreeing to have this conversation on my new balcony, Stan. Fine, whatever. Unfortunately, the new bird feeder I put up seems to be attracting crows, but that's balcony life. Did you know crow might be Latin for "air steak"? Roger, you said you had important news about Steve! Oh, yeah, Steve. I saw him ride off on horseback with a Canadian mountie. Those Canadian bastards! Who am I going to get him back? I need to talk to Dr. Penguin. I'm Lou Babadu, business guru. I'm renting Dr. P's office while he's dead or still at Sundance. I can't remember all the stories. My trainer got me to go Keto. I love it. Never had more energy. More about me? I have my blood recycled every month. I micro-dose acid every day. My watch has a shark tooth on it. I macro-dose acid every day. And I sleep upside-down like a bat! You're a businessman? Smart to be cautious. There are a lot of charlatans out there. Let me show you my stuff. [music playing] Business. I did that to open a trade show in Shanghai. Got a 4 minute ovation. Really ate into the five minutes I had to introduce the president of Arrogant Mountain Rubber Duck Company. Now, I hear you got some business moves yourself. Let's hear it. OK. Get the hell out of my office! I need time to process this! Wowie, zowie. You got this stuff. Go to this address. My dear friend Helen is the head of human resources at a Fortune 500 company. Just tell her Lou Babadu sent you. Screw you, Shannon. None of you stupid jerks deserve a genius like Rufus P Melonballer sorting your mail! Oh, windy. I'm quitting this job, and I'm gonna kill myself. I know a lot of you feel the same. Who's jumping out this window with me? [typing] [chattering] Oh, so it's like that, huh? Adios, being alive! Jerry jerks off under his desk. I think we might have an opening. [glass shatters] Whoa, it's really windy out there. Now, that lamp there we bought back in '89. I remember the year, because Amanda and I had just seen "Old Gringo", and I wanted something heavy to bash my head in. [laughter] You have a story for everything, even the wallpaper. Where did you say it was from? Egypt. We were there while Jordan was doing research for his economics dissertation. Mandy, a moment. I told you, I don't study economics. I'm a political scientist. That's right. Oh, well. Too late now. I said economics. It's been established. Candy. Candy, Candy, Candy. I can't let you go. How much you weigh, Candy? 100? I figure maybe 105? I guess about that. Mm-hmm. Pretty fat, tight. My wife used to look like you. Let's not get nasty, Professor. I'm just saying to the attractive girl that you used to look good, before you went to rehab. I never went to rehab! You have now. It's been established. This place is just what Langley Falls needs, a chic lounge environment for young professionals. If they need it so much, How come there's nobody here? I'm gonna eat you one day. My bar is dead. It doesn't make sense. I co-wrote City Slickers with Babalu Mandel, but I can't do this? [sighing] We need a-- we need a draw. We need a hook. WOMAN (SINGING): There's a saying old that says that love is blind. Still we're often told, seek and ye shall find. My dear lord. WOMAN (SINGING): So I'm going to seek a certain lad I had. In my looking everywhere haven't found him yet. He's the big affair I can not forget. Only man I ever think of with regret. Roger! Oh, relax. It's nothing I haven't seen before. [beeping] You perv! Get outta here! I'll leave after I tell you this. You just got a job singing in my lounge. - Really? - Shut up. I want you there tomorrow night, wearing something amazing. Oh, and don't worry about the camera. It's made of chocolate. Ow! Oh, that's right. It's the toilet camera that's chocolate. [beeping] Oh, boy. That's on film. This time I got him. Trust me. Hey, ref. I don't know where my guy is. I guess he'll have to forfeit. Fire, fire! Stop, drop, roll! [cheering] Damn it! Now he's one win away from breaking my record. Sorry, Stan. I locked him in the freezer. I don't how the kid set himself on fire. Small bills are in the safe. The rest is in my butt! I'm not here to rob you. I'm here to shoot a kid in a tree house. You know what kid I wanted to kill? The youngest daughter in "Mrs. Doubtfire". Hated her face. By the time I could get a good shot at her, she had grown up and turned into nothing. Barry's only one win away. I will not lose my record. Well, killing him should do it. Ugh, I can't get a clean shot. That damn oak tree is on the way. On it. I never knew you had such powerful legs. Really? Really? You didn't know I had powerful legs. You never stared at my legs before. OK. OK, I'll just play along. This is great. I can teach you how to wrestle. You can pose as a student at a rival high school, defeat Barry, and save my record! So let me understand this wrestling thing. The goal is to lie on top of another man against his will for three seconds in a bathing suit. Is this a high school sport or my trip to Cancun? [laughter] I'm sorry. No, I'm-- I'm-- I'm in. Next match, Barry Robinson and Dmitri-- Crotchlikmyov. Dmitri Crotchlikmyov, new exchange student from Russia. [whistle blows] One, two! Use your legs! I can't. I have really weak legs. - No, you don't. You have the opposite. - I know. Today's Opposite Day. No, it's not. That means it is! I'm not playing! That means you are! Roger, just win before the ref stops politely waiting for our conversation to end and gets to three! Fine. [screaming] One, two, three, winner! Yes! Yeah! I win, I win! Uh, Coach Smith, that's the guy from the other team. Shut up, corn beef! I can feel your pulse in my thigh. - Hey, Roger, what's-- - Where the hell have you been? You are not gonna believe what's going on in this house. Things are really going to pot around here. Great, it's locked. I forgot my key. Of course, you never gave me a key. That kind of bothers me, but that's not important. What is important is what's going on around here! You're gonna see, buddy. Oh, you are gonna see! This is great. Suddenly, security's real tight around here. You are just gonna lose it when you see what's going on in your house. You are really gonna blow your stack! The worst part of it is the disrespect to you. They are castrating you, quite frankly. I'm sorry, but that's what they're doing. They are cutting off your nads, period, end of story. Oh, you're gonna see it so soon! Look! Oh, it's sloppy. It's so wet. Oh, I love you, too! What in the hell is that? It's my new dog, Kisses. [laughter] I said, no dogs! Oh, this is good for Steve. And it'll be good for you to love a dog again. I bet Freddy is smiling down from doggie heaven right now. I hope he Is I hope he's up there living in a lake house, driving a kickass speedboat, eating the foamy grass he just threw up. Oh, let Steve keep Kisses, Stan. Fine. But I won't have anything to do with that dog. If he buys a table at a charity event, I won't sit at it. I'm mad at you. You are consistently a problem for me. Hey, Roger. Snot made me this. He made it out of a Spanish worksheet. [sobbing] You really liked him, didn't you? I did, I did. He was just really sweet. Roger, I'm sorry. I guess I did want to be king of the nerds. But I'd rather have Snot happy than be king of anything. I want Snot happy, too, Steve! But it's too late now. Snot won't take me back after you revealed Jenny was faking it with him. True, but I think I just found a way for you to make him feel like a man again! Oh, how about you fill me in over a couple of beers? Great, right? I had two party balls implanted in my chest. One light beer, one regular. Coming at you! Ah! Stop it! Squirt. No, hey, stop it! Squirt, squirt! No, quit it! Agh! Squirt, squirt, squirt! It's no good, Steve. Nothing's gonna cheer me up. You're gonna use that street lamp or just lean on it? You? Snot, please hear me out. Yes, I tricked you with a stress ball, and it was a rotten thing to do. Extra rotten, if you ask me. I know. But I did it because I was saving myself for someone I loved. And I've realized that that someone is you. I wanna do it for real tonight. What do you say? Make love to me again for the first time. Come here, you! [moaning] Wow, Snot. You're the man again. Until tonight, my love. No! Brian, it's me, Ric-- Damn you, Ricky Spanish! He's here to apologize, geez! What did Ricky do to you, anyway? Tijuana, he did Tijuana to me! Oh, we were having ourselves a fine old time down Mexico way. [laughter] Yeah, well, I can take care of you. When out of the blue, Ricky jumped me and left me stranded. With no ID, I was stuck in TJ for six months. I had to work as the squeegee boy at a donkey show. Every night, watching a different girl sleep with the donkey I loved. Brian, I'm so sorry. I was a bad guy, but I'm trying to change. Aw hell, Ricky, I can't stay mad at you. I'm on way too many antipsychotics! Yeah. Steve Smith, Ricky Spanish. We're doing cocaine and shooting guns. Join us! I just met this woman, but I'm already really into it. Avery, I'm here to apologize for-- for killing your wife. Killing my wife? When? You seriously don't remember? Hey, man. It was her birthday. And you know how I am when I drink champagne. Yah! Oh, yes. I seem to recall something like that. So you're not mad at me? Why should I be? As you can see, everything in my life is going perfectly. [laughter] [screaming] Mr. Capellini, I'm Steve Smith. Ah, Josh's replacement. Welcome aboard. You're gonna ride along with Roger today to see how things work. [music playing] Come on, rookie. Stay close. But not too close. I swerve a lot, because I accidentally bought prescription sunglasses, which I don't need but I'm too embarrassed to return. Wow, how do you afford such a nice bike? How does a paper boy afford anything on the crap they pay? You bend the rules. You get extra papers and sell them on the side. Vacation hold. You get one of these, toss it, keep the papers, side sell 'em. You see a vacant, sign it up for a trial membership. More papers. Mo-- mo-- more papers, mo-- mo-- more money, mo-- mo-- more money, mo-- mo-- more speech therapy. Pleasure doing business with you, Cooper, you sleazebag. But, Roger, isn't this a little, you know, unethical? Do this job like a bitch, it'll take forever to get that soda squirter. How soon you wanna be squirting? I'd like to be squirting right now. OK, let's do it. Elian, is that you, baby? Come on, you're safe here. I will not send you back to Cuba. Dr. Yah-Yah? We'd like to talk to you about getting some ecstasy. What do you know about ecstasy? Only that you created it. I'm trying to create it, me and my roommate, Dave. [snoring] We're very close to cracking the formula. We have the MDM, but we're missing something. Of course, amphetamine, the missing ingredient! That's my stationery, my handwriting. How did you get this? Who are you? We're time travelers from the future. Now, I'm sure you have a lot of questions-- No, I'm good. We only have until midnight. Tell us where we can get some amphetamines! Dave's been partying for four days straight. He's a great artist. He painted the painting you see behind me. Let's see what we have. Some downers, yellow jackets, a Tinker Bell keychain, which I will hold on to. Ah, here we go, amphetamines. Oh my god. I have such a feeling of euphoria. I-- I-- glow stick dance! Dave, look at me! Our years of research have finally paid off. This will make your younger self totally uninhibited. How can I ever repay you? Someday I'll call on you for a favor. Cryptic! Cecilia Takaru is the name, born on a sleigh ride outside St. Petersburg. Closer to Tampa, actually. Or as us Tampons like to call it, home of Hulk Hogan. [laughter] Studied literature at space camp for four years, which naturally led me to franchise the Chimdale IKEA. Not a stress-free job, but I have a handle on it. Sorry, I blacked out. Oh, yeah, "Little Women". Alcott called it "little women" because she was challenging the male-centric Huck Finn and the role of females in a post-colonial America. Wow. Welcome, Cecilia. I-- I'm not familiar with the space camp curriculum, but wasn't "Little Women" published 20 years before Huck Finn? [gulps] In-- in space, time is very fluid, as Einstein hypothesized stuff from earlier might actually be from later. Pull it together. Einstein's Theory of Relativity. And to come up with that riding a Strassenbahen in Vienna, I'd say it was a greater leap for mankind than the moonwalk. Roger, what are you doing? Cecilia Takaru is a lie! All of these personas are lies! Well, yeah. Masks, they cover up the fact that I'm empty inside! Roger, that's not true. It took meeting someone as real as Meredith for me to see I'm like an onion. When you peel away the layers, there's nothing left, except tears! [sobbing] What are you doing? No! [screaming] Die, all of you! This is agony. I programmed them to feel burning. Back to crazy! [screaming] Why would you do this? That was your life's work! That life is over. I'm done creating characters. I'm gonna live the rest of my days at the most boring person on the planet, me! Well, you have to put on something. I can't drive you around looking like an alien! Fine! Drive, take me nowhere. It's the only place that nobody belongs. [sobbing] [screaming] All I'm saying-- Stacy, enough. We're sticking to the plan. I'm gonna drop you and your kids off at the zoo. Then I'm gonna go check out that belt sander I saw on Craigslist. And when I pick you up later, we're gonna go to Mama Mangia's for dinner, and we're gonna have a nice night. It's been a long time, OK? OK, Frank. God, I think the last time we had a nice night was-- Was when, Stacy? The night before I flunked the police academy entrance exam? I explained to you that test was bull. All trick questions. But let's go over the facts. My name is Frank Trublu. I get my haircut at barber shops. Look at me, Stacy. Do I not have all the signifiers of an off duty cop? No one's saying you're not like a cop, Frank. Everybody thinks that. You kids think of me as essentially a cop, right? [sighs] OK, I think we can still salva-- Good to have you back, leg man. So I ran that hair we found at the scene of the crime. You know how we thought no man could kick that hard? We were right. It was a kangaroo. You're a hell of a private-- [sobbing] --dick. Jeannie, I'm glad you're here. Because last night, it hit me. The perfect thing for Nerfer's bachelorette party? Strippers! Oh, yeah! Oh, yeah! Are we talking full frontal? Because I wanna see some-- [sobbing] --dick! We have fun, don't we, Clippy? Chargers are stupid. Raider Dave, get in here! I'm not in the right headspace. Just punch him in the balls for me. It's the area right under his-- [sobbing] Francine, wake up, wake up! Last night, the most wondrous thing happened. I couldn't sleep, so I went into town. And you remember that hunky single guy who owns the Italian soda shop, Marioigi? No, we've only been here for 12 hours. We fell in love, and we screwed! Bella, I love you. I must go now. Mwah. But then I realized, I'm a strong, independent woman. I don't need to be defined by a single man. [speaking italian] Did you sleep with all these-- [speaking italian and honking] You were right to bring me here. In Tuscany, I found the one thing I was looking for, me. I'm all better now. Let's cream out of here. Van Smash, how's it hanging? To the left down my pants and up the other leg. If you speak true, then you must have the lengthiest of johnsons. Good to have you back, Van Smash. I'm glad you're here, because we've got another special guest, my new GIRL Linda Vulnerabella. Black bra, see-through shirt, pure class. Chic, chic, chic. Like I always say, nobody who lives on a boat can stay dry for long. And I mean that in two ways. Eh! How did you two meet? We met at the marina bait shop. And he took me to this bar called-- Barnacles? That was our bar! I've never been to Barnacles with you, Van Smash. Yeah, Van Smash. What are you talking about, Van Smash? Oh, yeah. I'm Van Smash. Um, Linda, what's your deal? You like porn, you like Deadpool, you like something else? Like all women, I enjoy the wit and wisdom of Chester Cheetah. Isn't she great? Mwah. Did our time together mean nothing? Eh. Dick's always getting it in. Eh. I didn't realize you were such a womanizer. eh? Womanize her? I hardly know her. Eh. You're a snake, Dick! Eh. I'll show you a snake. My snake! Van Smash is hilarious. I had no idea he had a personality disorder. So funny! Sorry I had to whack you little guy. But hopefully you got some closure. Tomorrow, I'll take you to the laundromat and let you ride around in the dryer. That always cheers you up. Will you put a red sock in there with me? Maybe I'll come out a little pink. No problem, buddy. But you're not gonna turn pink. But maybe there's a tiny chance. Maybe. Get some sleep. Psych. I ain't going to sleep, until Dick pays for what he did. Sheesh, I hope this hitman's better at shooting people than he is at being on time. Oh, there you are. Here it is. I want him dead. Consider it done. This boat is hell. I wish I'd died in the flood. Steve, obviously we all wish we were dead. What is everyone complaining about? This boat is the best. Don't you think all your friends would love to be here with you? (SINGING) If they could see you now and all this fun that you've found, but they surely can't because they've all drowned, ghostly corpses on the ocean bed, they'd die of jealousy, but they're already dead. But if they could see you now, out on this party boat cruise, living the life and huffing diesel fumes, the only thing that we have to do is watch the temperature gauge and make it stay in the blue. Check out this petting zoo, wow. And this one's all you can eat. Ever had giraffe soup? Pow, you're in for a treat. What a fun ship. Holy cow. When you have to poop, be sure you do it over the bow. Climbing walls, there's just so much to do. And free blankets-- wait, that's a dead kangaroo. This boat's the cat's meow. Meow. If your friends could see you now. Jeff, what are you doing here? Who's watching the temperature gauge? [explosion] I feel like you're in a bad mood, Steve. Is this still about the wolf eating all the food rations? He can't help himself. He's a wolf. I know he's a wolf. Why would you bring him onto the boat? The wolf is great. [snarling] No way we're getting robbed with this guy aboard. You're the worst! You're unhelpful, you're unreliable, and you're the last person I would want to share a lifeboat with! I can't believe you feel this way. Well, then, goodbye, Steve. [splash] You want someone helpful at sea, then I'm your man. The name's Buck Wetnap, survivalist. OK. I once survived four days in a Del Taco parking lot, extracting lifesaving nutrients from puddles and bird shit. Why didn't you just go into the Del Taco? I'm a Taco Bell man. [sniffing] Meh, I don't know if I wanna go on this one. Smells like someone already peed here. Yup, tastes like pee. Yuck. So how did you become a race dog? Hold onto your knockers, because it's a pretty heartwarming tale. NARRATOR: He was originally cast as Eddie, the dog from "Frasier". But soon he discovered his real talent, running fast to escape the advances of Kelsey Grammer. Nobody says no to the Gram-man! You're saying Kelsey Grammer has sex with dogs? Yeah, Niles bangs turtles. Everyone in Hollywood knows this stuff. Oh, hey, babe. Hey, who's this? This is my new race dog. His name's-- Ryan. Ryan? Really? That's it? I-- I didn't know you were racing now. Well, I figured since you could do it, I'd try it out. Oh, OK. But racing's not easy. Not everyone has what I have with Flea Biscuit. We've got a special bond, don't we, boy? Yeah, well, I've got a special bond with my dog, too. Oh, Ryan. Oh, yeah, you're such a good boy, aren't you, Flea Biscuit? Good boy! Oh, you're the best thing that's ever happened to me. Oh, yes, and you have a super active tongue. Oh, my. OK, so we're gonna head home. Or just go to the park. Let's get to work. Fine. But why does your mouth tastes like beets? It's 9:00 AM. Are you an early morning beet-eater? That's insane. You're insane. But I'm insane, too. Insane for that big beet flavor! [muffled screaming] Stan, is this is a basketball gym? I told you, my playing days are over. Yeah, but I was thinking maybe this is more your speed. Ugh. I don't know, Stan. You think I'll fit in? - Hey, everyone. I brought a new guy. His name is-- Billy Jesusworth. Billy Jesusworth, this is Jackson, Dick, Buckle, Shaquille O'Neal. Shaq plays here? Us old heads gotta get some games whenever we can. For me, it's all about the joy. Buckle plays here? Man, easy, Stan. Face! Ugh! Bucket, and the foul. Why are you doing this to me? Because you called me old. You're the one who's old! You're washed up. What, so you just brought me here to make me look stupid? [sobbing] Damn, Stan. And you said that guy was your friend. That's cold blooded. Shaq could use someone like you for the 2 on 2 tournament. Hey, you serious right now? Absolutely. You seem like the toughest dude out here. You noticed! Oh, my heart is soaring right now. [sobbing] The far doors are locked. I'm gonna try the other ones. [sobbing] Hey, watch it, buddy. You watch it. We have 40 tons of overalls to unload. Overalls? Whoa, you're into overalls, too? I've been looking for the perfect pair, but it's so hard to find the right-- Chest pocket! Partner, follow my lead. [whistling] Come on, Jeff! [whistling] There's no cone to kick. Just get in. I'll explain on the way why a second cone isn't important. Because this is perhaps my most challenging character, both physically and mentally, even more than my mentally challenged bodybuilder character, Arnold Schwarzenegger. First I have to apply several layers of this pungent lacquer face paint to really make it look like I'm made out of wood. Which is important, because almost all of my material is wood-based puns. Ugh, it smells worse than Principal Lewis's index finger. Then Yeah painful prosthetics to give me fully flappable eyebrows and ears. And finally, I inject just a skosh of paralyzing agent into my arms and legs. Wow, you move just like a dummy. Now, Steve, why do you think I slapped you? It's because you used a certain word. Do you know what that word is? - Is it-- That's right. Never, ever call me a dummy. The word "dummy" is degrading. I am a manually articulated performative kinesio maquette-- named Dudley Dingleberry. He liked it! Not so fast. I think the periods imply detached sarcasm. Of course they do. The entire second verse you were plucking instead of plinking. Don't you start, fish. You play that gusli like a syphilitic babushka. Quiet! You're both bourgeois mediocrities. Wait, where are you going? I don't need you two to get famous. Most people just come to hear the garmon, anyway. Fine, the mariachi band at El Compadre's been begging me to join them. And I'll just become a solo gusli sensation. [laughter] Look who thinks he's the next Igor Kasminov! Oh, that is it. From here on, consider this balalaika trio kaputski! Fine! Nothing will unite us ever again! Presents! Haley, this megaphone is the absolute top of the line. Certain to make you the most annoying person at your next Occupy rally. Thanks, dingus! Roger, I found you this limited edition porcelain doll of Jon-Benet Ramsey as an angel! Are you implying that there was any version of her that wasn't? Oh god, I love her so much! [sobbing] Klaus, we got you a Tiffany fishbowl. It's just like your regular fish bowl, except it's expensive for some reason. Whatever. As long as I have the blue box to show the girls. And finally, for Stan, a custom Rolex with a special display that counts down the minutes until Rachel Maddow's death! How did I pay for all this? Well, money of course. Oh, who are we kidding? We lifted it! We pinched it! We gave it the old zazu! I'm assuming from context that "old zazu" also means stealing. Yes. [gasping] I can't believe what I'm hearing. Shoplifting? Seriously, guys? For shame! [snickering] Francine, what are we teaching our children, and aliens and fish? I may not have the authority around here I once had, but damn it, I still know what's right! I'm sorry, but Rachel Meadow's death will just have to come as a pleasant surprise to me. Promise me, you two will never steal again. OK, Dad. I promise we'll never shoplift again. Will we, Mom? OK. Are we done here? Because we were in the middle of a storm-off. Our balalaika trio is finished! I can't believe we're going to see the Nationals play. We said it, and we're doing it! (SINGING) Buy me some peanuts and Cracker Jacks. I don't care if I-- wait, what are we doing? I wanna talk about my dad. I don't even like baseball. - Well, me neither. I thought you wanted to go. I hate that game. So slow. Not like go-karts. I love go-karts. How great are go-karts? - So great. - You know what we should do? We should call a cab, take it out to the slick track. Totally. And then we'll just open it up and see how fast we can-- what? No, Roger! I'm in a crisis with my father! Right, well, it seems to me the only way you can regain the upper hand is to assert your dominance. Luckily, I know an easy way to make that happen. I've been trying to think of a way all day. Surely it can't be that easy. As a matter of fact, it is. And please stop calling me "Shirley". [laughter] How great is the movie "Airplane"? So great. [laughter] The pilot has an unnatural interest in that little boy! It didn't seem unnatural to me! [laughter] Here we are, suburban teenage house party. Booze and hormones are a-flowing. Anyone can get laid here, even you. Just watch old Bing Cooper for a while, learn from the master. You're my Obi-Wan. I'm gonna give you two seconds. Leave that [bleep] right out here on the lawn. Bing! What's up fools? Wildcats take state! Yeah! - How does everyone know you? - What do you mean? I throw parties here all the time when my parents go out of town. My parents are super into me. Who were-- you grew up here? Well, we lived in Wisconsin till I was 5. Then my dad got transferred. He worked for Toyota. That's how I learned to speak Japanese. Moo Shu pork, Melissa. Hey, Beth. Hey, Bing. Here we are, the epicenter of drunk girls, the kitchen. They wanna be close to the booze at all times. I don't know if I can do this, Roger. Hey, do you wanna be the alpha male of the house or not? OK, OK. But how do I approach them? What-- what do I say? Just say the three sweet words they long to hear-- "jello shot, bitch?" Jello shot, bitch? Make it happen, Steve. Bing, I just saw an acceptance letter from UCLA on your fridge. What's going on? I thought we were going to Arizona State together. [sighs] This isn't how I wanted you to find out. I wanted you to find out by me not showing up at Arizona State. Sorry, I'm late. I was in IKEA, and I couldn't figure out how to leave. Every path led back to home office. It's OK, Dr. Penguin. I've been feeling really guilty about-- Hold on. Well, I've just been-- Um, hang on. There we go. Shoot. Dr. Penguin, I'm still hiding my new girlfriend from my mom and dad. Uh-oh. That's normal, a teenager embarrassed of his parents. It's more than that. I've actually been pretending my neighbors Greg and Terry are my parents. Yes, I know them. I painted them. My folks would be devastated if they knew the truth. What should I do? Wow. I am hungrier than I thought. [sniffing] And you need to keep lying. What? Eventually it'll become second nature, and you'll stop feeling guilty. OK. Thanks, Dr. Penguin. I always feel safe here. How many times have you been playing with yourself a day? Three. We're gonna that to five. You can take this prescription to any room in the house with Kleenex and have it filled. Thanks, doc. I can't believe the family comes to you for therapy. People shouldn't ignore their emotions and avoid their problems! What do you know? You're just a stupid fish. I am a man in a fish's body. I studied psychology at Frankfurt University! If they came to me with their problems, I could actually help them, not to mention get the respect I deserve in this family! Snowglobe! No, no! You Sgt. Pepper? You're the one who cleaned the toilet by the grotto? Yes, sir. You're a wild man, you know that? He's a wild man. You know that? I want to shake your hand. Thank you, sir. How many toilets have you cleaned? I'm-- I'm not quite sure. Sergeant, I asked you a question. 873. 873. That has to be a record. What's the best way to clean one of them stink holes? The way that you don't get turd in your hair, sir. [laughter] That's a good one. Spoken like a wild man. Sgt. Pepper, you've been officially discharged. Nothing doing. I can't fit in with civilized society no more. When I go to bed at night, I see men hovering over me with their naked asses in my face. I'm not ready to leave that. Oh, bring me up. Let me talk to him. But you have to come back! I ruined the family. They need Dr. Penguin. Tough titcacas. What now, White James? You always think of something, Klaus, like when you convinced my parents to let me go to art school. [snoring] Goodbye, Sgt. Pepper. [bugle playing] What am I doing here? This isn't a chambly. This isn't my aunt's place. Aunt Evelyn? Aunt Evelyn, me, Raphael! Raphael Penguin! Good morning, Dr. Penguin. Ready to come home? Thank you. We'll call your fake name when it's ready. Next! Roger? The name is Kevin Ramage. Roger? I'm only doing this one more time. The name is Kevin Ramage. Word on the street is, you're horning in on my business. Yeah, well, word on the street is, your product sucks. Yeah, well, word on the street is, I don't have a comeback for that. But what I do have are these brawny side men. Show 'em the rough stuff, boys! [groaning] If you don't get out of my territory, this is gonna be you. Get lost, Ramage. Yeah, there's a new counterfeiter in town. And his name is Steve. No, Haley. I've given a lot of thought to this. From now on, my name is Gutenberg. Oh, like the inventor of the printing press. Steve Gutenberg invented the printing press? OK, guys, I believe we've made our point. If you two don't back off my territory, then this is what's waiting for you. That's right. So you better think long and hard. [groaning] I brought you guys here so you can get to know Gina better. I know you have your doubts, but once you get to know her I'm sure you'll see what I see. Oh. Breathe. Hey, guys. Hot enough for you? [laughter] Listen, chuckles. I know what you're up to, and I don't like it. I don't know what you're talking about. Don't you? Kiss her, Mommy, kiss her. Yeah. Come on, Maxie, it's too crowded in here. Let's go play some volleyball. You go. I'll have fun watching you have fun. OK! Hey, why don't you two lovebirds kiss before you go? Love to. Mwah! [vomiting] See, Max? She's repulsed by you. What? She does that every time we kiss. She says it's because she gets so excited. Max, are you OK with that? With what? [laughter] It's like a damn Dr. Dre video out there. I see what you mean. I've been an old fool. This is not right. No, it's not right! It's offensive! Right in your face. What's happening? I zoned out for a second. I can't do this anymore. Gina. Gina, can I talk to you? [indistinct speech] That's right, bitch, cry. No more money for-- why is he getting down on one knee? Please be a bomb. Please be a ring bomb. You were right! I needed to lock this down. We're getting married! Mwah. [vomiting] Steve, meet the fellas. This is Dill Shepherd and Johnny Golf. Actually, it's Johnny Golfscrimandtennis, but that's a real mouthful. The calamari, the ribeye, the turkey club, the key lime pie, and the crab stuffed Dover sole. Yo! That's enough of that. Steve, honey, finish pushing that onto the floor for me. [clattering] Good boy. Here's a hundo. I don't like this, Horatio. These are not the type of people I want my son to be influenced by. Don't worry, Stan. He's a good kid. I'm sure he'll be able to keep his head on straight. Woohoo! ROGER: Yeah, I hate birds, and am therefore glad that you kicked one. Here is money! Mom, told me this is a joke. There's no way you married this guy! She did. Now we're registered at Crate & Barrel, but if you'd rather make something, that would be a lot more special. But I don't-- Oh, you wanna know how we met? Sit, sit. After all this time, I never get tired of telling our story. At first, we barely even got along. BETTY: But then we realized we had a ton in common. ROGER: Like telling this story. We both apparently love telling this story. I thought I was just gonna do it on my own, but, oh, well. In addition to both of us loving tea, it turns out Betty and I are also both huge fans of laughing while drinking tea. [laughter] BETTY: Tom eventually invited me to take a beginners yoga class. We connected on a physical, emotional, and spiritual level. I haven't been this happy since I was with Hercules. That was three days ago. Betty, can you give me a hand with the champagne? I'll miss you. I'll miss you more. Not possible. You married my mother just to get your attic back! Why on earth would I want my attic back if it meant having to share it with some old lady I didn't even love? I'm sorry you don't trust me, but what your mother and I have is real. To true love. To happy endings. Oh, you. I know what that means. Prove it. Mom, I've known this guy for years. He's a manipulative sociopath! Stan! It's OK, Betts. Big family changes are often hardest on the children. Let's just take it step by step. You know, Stan, Betty and I would love to have you and Francine over for dinner tonight. Well, you can just forget-- That sounds wonderful, Tom. Stan, I think this actually might be good for your mom. [moaning] Ugh! Well, look who it is. Sun's already almost up, Sleeping Beauty. I was stuck in the wall, fighting off hundreds of tiny spiders! Oh, yeah, we're raising spiders now, too. I'm gonna sell 'em to a Spider-man movie. Which we'll never see, of course, because we're foregoing all modern technology. On pain of shunning? Done. We'll need maximum discipline, because this homestead must succeed. I quit my job and took out a mortgage with a 39% interest rate to pay for the renovations. You did what? The bankers were high fiving while I signed the paperwork. Looking back, probably should have been a red flag. Maybe we need to worry less about me becoming farm tough and more about you being so farm stupid! [gasping] Shun her, Stan! She talketh back to thee, dude! Hold up. Wait, though, I wanna get this for my TikTok! [gasping] - Google! Aw, shit. I'm gonna get shunned, aren't I? Roger has violated the rules of the farm. He must be shunned. It was one mistake. And we just came up with the rule. Why are you being so hard on him? Because modern luxuries make us soft. Roger, you are shunned. Whatever. I'm still the most Amish mother [bleep] here.
Info
Channel: TBS
Views: 4,449,937
Rating: 4.6363506 out of 5
Keywords: TBS, TBS Network, Comedy, TBS Shows, Shows, TBS Funny, TBS New, New TBS, American Dad, Seth MacFarlane, Mike Barker, Matt Weitzman, Stan Smith, Francine Smith, Steve Smith, Kayley Smith, Hayley Smith, Klaus Heissler, Jeff Fischer, Roger, American Dad Stan, American Dad Roger, American Dad TBS, Stan, characters, best of Roger’s, fan-favorite, favorite characters, Tearjerker, Ricky Spanish, Legman, General Juanito Pequeño, Jeannie Gold
Id: H9rO5sKzOiQ
Channel Id: undefined
Length: 71min 43sec (4303 seconds)
Published: Tue Sep 15 2020
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