AITA For Telling My Parents To Punish My Sister? [Reddit Relationships Advice]

hey guys check out our new channel for more edit relationship stories relationship hunt link in description enjoy the video am i the antagonist for asking my husband to not go to grocery store a minute before they close the grocery store near our place closes at nine zero pm and i asked my husband to get some milk for tomorrow at eight 15 p.m he was browsing reddit and said he will leave in a while i was getting anxious and kept nagging him to leave every five minutes which he ignored fast forward to eight 45 he is slowly putting his jacket on and searching for car keys and i get upset and start having an argument about why he is delaying till the closing time he said i'm being unreasonable and the grocery store employees are required to serve every customer till the time of closing and he will go late and not feel bad for it because they are getting paid for it i told him he was being an [ __ ] for behaving this way but he said i was being one for forcing him to what i think is better behavior edit since many are asking why i did not go myself i'm sick and down with fever hence asked him to go usually we go together or i do it alone now for the top comments nta because i've read your reply to one comment that said you're currently sick get well soon up also not the a-hole for me because even though groceries do serve customers even if they go past closing time it's still in our move to use that against them these are likely underpaid workers and they may have to do clean up after some of them might even have to travel for a bit just to get home they are not getting paid for the odd i think and just because it's common knowledge that groceries serve way past closing time doesn't mean it's decent to do that without valid reason when i worked at a clothing store we closed at seven and i had about five minutes to close the checkout and do the money stuff or i would miss my bus it was the very last one to get home missing it meant walking for about 10 kilometers partly through a freaking forest that had a 100 km h road with no sidewalk my boss was cool though she allowed me to make sure no one checks out after seven or try on clothing minutes before clothes carrot carrot nta he's the hole here for having that mincer he's the a hole here for having that mincer spot the jerk who has never worked retail slash customer facing service and understands what closing time means op good on you calling out this [ __ ] behavior from your husband not the a-hole he sounds like the kind of person who complains about being blocked from shopping more after closing time not only that he is incredibly entitled and i bet a demanding and difficult customer no doubt he is also a terrible tipper in a restaurant right my man needs some time in the real world of customer service to fix that shitty attitude of his nta i used to work night shift at a supermarket which shut at midnight we would start warning people over the pa 15 minutes before closing time to finalize their purchases and leave the store we would still have idiots trying to limbo under the closing roller doors right on midnight and we would tell them to get out we closed at 12 that doesn't mean get in by 12 and do all your shopping and we will still serve you it means that right on the dot of midnight the tills are switched off doors are locked and we leave nta i work overnights and my store closes to customers at midnight too people can be such nightmares we had regulars come up to the registers at midnight multiple times a week with cards that took 10 to 20 minutes to get through people who had entered hours before and each time we told the midnight means out the door not at the checkout then the people rushing in right before close etc etc the majority of which were the root kind of customer our self scans are open all night for employees but they have a mini reboot at midnight any customer who comes up at midnight then has to wait around for them to come back up idk why people just don't understand we make announcements it's not difficult then on the opposite side there are people who presumably hear the warnings decide they don't have time and then ditch their carts full of fresh meat and ice cream and leave the store people are trash [ __ ] they can't even put the perishables back nope worst i ever saw was a full cart abandoned a few yards from the registers had a ton of non-perishables and then a few gallons of milk raw meat ice cream cooler vegetables that we have to throw out if found outside of the cooler shelves and a tub of yogurt they always take the care to make sure it's slightly out of sight though webta to continue to try and change my dog's name so the way my family got our dog molly was a bit awkward i know that she's a rescue and since her original owner starved her she's very food sensitive i don't know the person who initially adopted her but they passed her on to a friend of my uncles who passed her on to my uncle who passed her on to my family because of her food sensitivity she would eat drink anything and everything and was vomiting constantly so everyone else deemed her too much of a hassle i've been working with her since october and she's a lot better now she doesn't try to drink from the toilet bathwater anymore and she's actually picky with her food now anyway my family hates the name molly like we love the dog she's so cute but it's just not a name we would have picked for our dog she's three though it's not like she'll stop replying to molly however we used to have a dogma and molly used to reply to the name mayor even though we weren't calling her so my mom started experimenting with names we found out that molly responds to mary kind of like mariposa and if we say merry with our mexican accent she responds even faster we've been calling her mary in the house but we haven't changed her dog tag or anything i guess my uncle and his family found out because they are messaging me saying hey i'm cruel for trying to change the name of a rescue for trying to put her through even more than she's gone through in her life and that we should just keep the name molly i didn't think it was a huge deal but then again i guess it is a name change this late into her life and she's gone through a lot so maybe i'm being cruel am i the antagonist now for the top comments nta dogs are not people they learn to respond to a word not that their name is spot and as you said molly and mary sound similar the dog doesn't care she just wants to be in a loving home yeah it's like she doesn't know what a name is she knows that when you make certain sounds it's referring to her and if she comes to you when you say those sounds it means she gets treats and pets and stuff and it's not like it's a completely different name so it would be confusing for her or something nta my dog was three when we adopted her she had also been neglected by previous owners her new name is nothing at all like her previous name dogs don't have an attachment to what you call them it's not what you call them but how that gets them to respond you're fine or the attachment is the sounds and the behavior that comes after when you train dogs to sit they don't know what that word means they know that sound and they attach it to a behavior that gets them positive reinforcement in a similar way a dog might hear the sound of a name and attach to it that that sound comes with abuse but the new name or sound comes with positive affection and that's what matters not the dog not that the name in and of itself nta it is perfectly normal to change a dog's name they are not attached to their name the way humans tend to be i work with a variety of rescue groups and it is pretty common to rename dogs after they are adopted nta she's a dog and as much as people try to ascribe humane motions to dogs she's still a dog she's not going to get offended or upset and doesn't know her name is hers just that when you say that grouping of sounds you mean her she will respond to whatever she is trained to respond to when i adopted my dog this prior owner acted the same way i explained it made him more my dog and when she continued to be rude i told her that if she didn't want his name changed then she should have kept him she belongs to you and your family call her whatever you guys want she won't experience anything like trauma from a name change dogs do feel some emotions like people do but yeah folks can go overboard thinking they are just like people in all ways people with purse puppies for example yikes i would wonder if molly was the name the dog had back when it was being abused if so then i see two possibilities one to the dogs hearing the names aren't identical and it has learned to associate the sound molly with abuse and this new sound with no abuse or two these folks are saying the names differently may be more excited and joy when saying mary not this old name and the dog is reacting to the emotion pheromones happy tone of voice and all that this might also be true even if uncle named the dog molly nta the dog will learn their new name found dogs that are at a shelter are given a name since there was no way of knowing what the original name was i once adopted a dog from a shelter that was assigned the name eileen i renamed her because she didn't look like an elin and also i couldn't see myself at the dog park calling out money lean we named another rescue because he had the same name as one of my cats plus he had been badly abused and i wanted to give him a fresh start nta it's not his dog he should mind his own business the dog's true name is still unknown humans just give dogs nicknames mary is what this dog knows that the humans who love her call her molly is what her abusers and neglectus called her nta mary is a great dog nickname am i the antagonist for telling my parents to punish my sister i 15 f live with my parents and my siblings 11 f and 8 male my sister and i do not have a good relationship i think she's spoiled entitled and winnie as hell i think my parents let her act however the heck she wants to act and they don't give a crap how it affects everyone else it's like she's still two years old allowed into everyone's things to interrupt when people are talking is allowed to dictate [ __ ] even when it's meant to be someone else's turn like my brother's birthday he wanted burgers and she wanted pizza so pizza it was even though her favorite place he doesn't like and it was his birthday or when it was mine and i wanted tacus and she wanted pizza another time i was babysitting in my brother and i wanted mcdonald's and she wanted pizza again and she threw an epic tantrum because she couldn't get her way and then our parents told me i was wrong even for family time she will throw a tantrum if she doesn't like the movie chosen and then she gets to choose they've even changed my brother's last two birthday parties to do what she likes instead of what he likes and he was heartbroken the last time because he really wanted to do go-karting i hate it she's not a baby she's just spoiled and i do not like spending time with her i only spend time with her when it's family time and even then it's such a putter i have a diary where i vent about her so i won't end up saying that stuff to her face i keep it under my mattress yesterday i was dropping off stuff at my grandparents house and when i got home she had turned my room upside down and she found my diary she was hurt by the stuff i read and mad about it too and she threw another tantrum but i was more pissed my parents were mad at me when she snooped and tossed my stuff around they said my punishment should be having to clean it up which i found really unfair and i told them and i told them it was so they should punish i told them nobody will want to deal with her eventually if she keeps acting like that and she deserved to be punished for doing what she did my parents were then even more mad that i was telling them what to do and how to parent they said i should apologize for that i don't think it's wrong when they are the ones encouraging bad behavior i also think it's fair when they let her get away with [ __ ] am i the antagonist now for the top comments nta this is clear for veritism she's going to have a hard time when she gets older and people stop tolerating her shenanigans your parents are mad at you because you're right if they weren't so bad at parenting you wouldn't need to tell them how to parent she will probably manipulate other people nta your parents are enabling her behavior and they are either willfully ignorant about it or know exactly what they are doing and have picked her out as the golden child can you go to your grandparents about how your parents and sister are acting they've tried before my parents don't care it annoys the crap out of them too my only advice would be to keep a record of exactly what happens your sister dictates a meal write it down she overthrows a celebration meant for someone else write it down if your parents start claiming you or your brother are being unfair simply remind them of all the times your sister has gotten her own way if you can ask your grandparents to do the same and call out the behavior in the same way hopefully with enough reminders they'll get the message that they need to put their foot down as for your sister i would ignore the childish behavior if she interrupts a conversation remind her once that you're speaking with someone else and you'll talk to her once you're done if she interrupts again don't acknowledge her be firm with her but don't be horrible it absolutely should not be down to you to discipline your sister but when she's around you you can show her that you won't put up with it nta your parents are being awful enablers and it sucks that no one else sees that it will hurt the mallet more in the future if they don't start now with better parenting nta you need to start throwing a tantrum back and get your brother involved as well two can yell louder than one a resounding chorus of that's not fresh sabra at etc may start resonating with your parents if they want an easy life and giving in to her is it then play her at her own game birthday party wise definitely start out right refusing no it is my slash brother's birthday if she doesn't like it she's not invited and definitely start telling your sister this stuff directly i don't want you at my birthday you are trying to change it to what you want so you aren't welcome keep it up ignore the tears etc refuse to apologize and speak calmly to parents about their favoritism and how they are ruining your birthdays to the point you won't want anything to do with sister when you're old enough to have a choice this stuff will sink in but be clear and direct speak with authority edit to add other covered tactics through general speaking why don't you just rename family time sibling time it all revolves around her anyway parent no it doesn't oh yes it does reason one two three i don't even want to take part in sibling time anymore no really i don't staying firm don't take it back e g i think it would be really nice to let little brother pick the film doesn't he deserve it but he does why does she get to pick but i really don't want to watch that i'm happy to watch the film little brother wants to pick pop doesn't even have to raise her voice just speak and keep speaking i'm confused she's picked the last five films little brother hasn't picked one neither have i how does that make sense whilst totally ignoring 11 rolling around on the floor next birthday and sibling is changing the venue fine i don't want to go then no it's supposed to be my birthday you are ruining it sister is ruining it so let's not do anything then or go and take your favorite child with you that one would really make a point just gotta keep it up children don't have authority your advice is just as likely to get up and her brother very severely punished getting severely punished is not fun op is already getting punished i can't speak to the efficacy of the above tactic but if the parents aren't listening to reason then i don't know what else op can do to rectify the situation short of asking to move in with extended family edit grammar am i the antagonist for telling my brother i'm not going to his wedding my brother arranged to get married last summer but it was cancelled due to the pandemic the year before i flew to australia to work and travel and was told i'd have to leave worse earlier than planned as he had moved the date earlier by year after the first cancellation he moved the wedding to christmas time so i quit my job in australia and decided to travel before his wedding as i probably won't be able to come back due to border closures he then cancelled it again with no new date moved back to the family home and took the spare room i was supposed to move into when i came back from traveling as i gave up my job flat etc and instead planned to save up to buy a house i've heard nothing since august last year about this wedding since then i'm still in australia working and have a flat we've got plans to travel when our working rights run out and we've bought a car and started converting it to a camper several months ago my family has known about my plans to stay until christmas of this year i always say it's possible i'll be home before because of the current climate but i've been pretty set on the end of the year but my brother has now said he's booking his wedding for august of this year and i have to come home despite having no bedroom to go back to having to self-isolate and give up everything we have been planning two months out here for a wedding tonight that might not go ahead anyway i told him i will not come to his wedding obviously this turned into an argument am i the [ __ ] ldrt brother cancelled wedding several times and rebooked it for a date i'm not available because i'll live on other side of the world now upset i don't want to go now for the top comments nta look it seems like he is either a complete [ __ ] tool or he enjoys wasting your time you tried three times because of him it's time he changed his date for you complete [ __ ] tool hey that is insulting to tools that are actually useful you have turned yourself inside out for your brother opus it is time for him to get a grip and understand he is wasting your i think he is just a jerk who is using a wedding to jerk you around opus and honestly [ __ ] tools leave people feeling good unlike ops brother i just snorted thank you nta i would never get mad at someone for being unable to fly across the ocean to attend my wedding his reasoning is that may make me a bit of an arseholes that i can fly across the ocean i'm on a temporary visa i can sell my car give up my flat and my travel plans because i was going to come home eventually my reason for saying no is the fact i can give all that up and the current climate might result in this wedding being cancelled again so his reasoning is that you're an [ __ ] if your whole life doesn't revolve around him doesn't sound like someone worth prioritizing to me just zoom it and be done nta if it matters so much to him he can set up a way for you to digitally attend if he manages to keep to the schedule this time exactly everyone goes to weddings on zoom now it's no big deal the nta is your brother aware of just how much of a pain it would be to leave australia at the moment it's not that you don't want to go it's that you genuinely can't i mean i'm not even entirely sure that you'd be able to leave right now for anyone not in the know if you run a temporary visa and you leave australia then you'd have to get a travel exemption to return flights aren't very frequent and are really expensive on your return you'd have to quarantine for two weeks in a hotel at your own expense about three thousand dollars i'm a permanent resident living in australia my husband and i have family in ireland and the uk and we've agreed that no matter what happens illness death etc no matter how much we want to it's just not feasible for us to travel in this current environment for me as i have a very temporary visa in australia it is not as hard to leave as i don't have a perm life here and eventually i will lose work rights anyway me and my partner are in fact on an extension visa as he is a key worker so once the pandemic ends we will probably ask to go home nevertheless getting home is still not easy as it was flights are ridiculously expensive i have to get tested here in aus before boarding certain layovers means hotel quarantine in my own country i have to self-isolate regardless i have to get vaccinated on arrival to my country because they have also introduced a vaccine passport as you know with australia we don't have vaccine readily available yet more likely to get covered due to lack of exposure as we have been very lucky here to have been away from every single hot spot in horse whereas my country is riddled with it but it is also a one-way flight leaving australia now would mean no return for me yup not the a-hole if you leave australia even for a wedding in your and your partner's circumstance you are leaving permanently i would even argue that you are also putting your health at risk as it is unlikely you will receive the vaccine in time for an august wedding politely declined to your brother cite that due to uncertainty created by covert 19 you are unable to attend a second time emphasis this speak frankly with your parents about how disappointed you are that you cannot make the new date due to covert 1980 cetc so that the family gossip chain are all aware of your circumstances rather than make poor assumptions honestly if your brother or any of the family kick up a fuss they are via h not you

Channel: Reddit Hunt

Views: 2,107

Rating: 5 out of 5

Keywords: aita, askreddit, reddit aita, reddit open marriage, reddit, cheating reddit, reddit cheating wife, reddit cheating, aita update, reddit relationships, reddit update, reddit stories, reddit funny, reddit breakup stories, reddit confession, relationship STORIES, reddit family relationships, reddit relationship advice, relationship drama, break ups, reddit cheating girlfriend, reddit revenge, reddit creepy, reddit school, reddit relationship stories, tifu, reddit hunt

Id: puXvHuDf5vQ

Length: 23min 22sec (1402 seconds)

Published: Fri Apr 09 2021