A Place Of Peace Of Mind Ft. Dr. Cheyenne Bryant

ladies and gentlemen once again it's honor privilege and a pleasure to be in a safe space in A Brave Place uh where it's all about counseling and not canceling uh this is Council culture the place where we can feel together deal together reveal together so we can heal together and I am joined by an illustrious guest um man it's a it truly is an honor um this professional this expert is uh the president of the NAACP Ranch 1069 that's a that's that's intense That's Heavy she has her own Street dedicated uh to her in Los Angeles because of her skill set I mean author motivational speaker Community activist uh as well as uh a co-producer and psychology expert on the hit reality show Teen Mom family reunion um I it's long overdue I'm excited um cuz not only is she a life coach but she is also a marriage Family and Child therapy professional the one and only Dr Cheyenne Bryant what's up Nick such a pleas I'm winded with that my goodness um it it's truly a pleasure I'm on your couch today uh we have a lot to discuss uh I've been doing Council culture for quite some time and I created this platform specifically like I said earlier for men uh to be able to be vulnerable right uh but you know no hoes bars like really like be held accountable for you know what we say what we do uh but be able to have a conversation about anything so people like yourself professionals like yourself are are needed uh one to really discuss mental Wellness uh in our community but then also to hold our our our brothers to the fire when they when it needs to be me starting with me um and in that sense I say because um you've done a lot of work uh not just you know as a a doctor and as a therapist but also with legislation um when it comes to making sure that we have these opportunities as men men and women but specifically men for in facilities of incarceration but specifically in our community to have places to go to be able to deal absolutely uh to be able to repent to be able to uh have some sort of Reform and Reconciliation so uh I lean in you know at the beginning of this just to say if you could expound on that but then also to say you know it it's that time to to really talk that talk and you know we we hug it out and say you know black men you matter but then at the same thing this is black men this is how you can do better no absolutely and the whole black men you matter is just a slogan because when you look at politics even uh just go back to anyone who's watched any presidential debate any Congressional debate any local city city council mayor debate there is so much conversation around women and women of color and how to make things safer when we're giving birth how to make things safer for us healthwise right but there is never a conversation about black men um when it comes to the rise in diabetes prostate cancer uh when it comes to the rise in suicide and suicide ideations within our black male Community where black men are three times more likely to commit suicide than black women and suicide used to be a white thing and now I'm not condoning suicide against any human race I I think suicide is dark it's it's sad it's lonely and you know it's a human right to have a mental health and have a great quality of life but when you look at it where it transition from being a white thing to now it's a black and male thing there's there are more issues than just a conversation can help and when you talk about legislation um you know there's a thing called Amber Alert and Amber Alert is when you know any child is missing um under the age of 18 okay well you know a good friend of mine who is amazing Senator uh now running for lieutenant governor uh Steven Bradford our Cali Senator he came out with uh the am the ebony alert the ebony alert does what it alerts when there are black kids and black adults that are missing so we need legislation that doesn't say let's put a blanket over this okay we need legislation that says loud and clear that this bill this legislation this policy is for black men for a black man um going a little further when we talk about incarceration you know we need to be in a space of Deliverance and not dismissal and a lot of times not just from a political standpoint but also from a professional standpoint like health care and and mental health but also from just being in the community in the inner city or being in the community as just a person who is black or a person of color um we need to be able to look at how do we deliver each other even as friends than just dismiss and sabotage because that comes from a root of pain and a root of Abandonment and a root of inferiority and a root of many other things right and so with incarceration um how do we do more mental health diversion instead of incarceration time because the relapse rate of someone coming out of prison and doing the exact same Act is a 92% so at 92% if me and you go to jail for anything we're more than likely going to repeat that behavior but if you're going to get 10 years in prison and the judge and cuz I'm all for somebody getting the time when they do the crime the judge says hey look you know Nick I'll give you two years in prison but you got five years of mental health diversion what is mental health diversion mental health diversion means you're going to a counselor a therapist a psychist a psychologist that's going to go deeper into what is the root of what's going on with the behavior you continuously create why is your three-part house how you think how you feel how you behave out of alignment right where did you either learn this Behavior or what is your payoff for this Behavior so we can figure out how to get you to unlearn to relearn okay reprogram so your Norms shift into a new Norm that can be conducive real reform okay and so when you're putting someone in a Slammer that's dismissal there's no Deliverance in there facts there's no Deliverance in there you know and so the real thing is to make sure that yeah no problem that make sure that we are getting black men to a place of um having a diversion and also you said accountability really quick like I love accountability but I hate the way it's thrown around because accountability isn't something that I can just tell you Nick you need to be accountable and then tomorrow morning you're just like you know what doc I apologize I'm sorry I'm accountable yeah those are The Superficial surface words of accountability right but let me explain this people not just black men people need the tools on how do you really take accountability what is accountability that's true cuz sounds like you say it but it's like how did it really happen like or like it's like apology is empty if there's no action behind it that makes I mean so and then what action how do you choose as a black man I'm telling you as a black man no you need to be accountable this was wrong what you I'm accountable okay right and then what and then what and then what if all you know is how to say I'm sorry what if that's the the the what if that's the extent to your capacity of accountability guilty I'm guilty of that I I'm I have no problem saying I'm sorry and if especially if I know that's going to get me out of trouble really quickly like yeah all right I'm sorry don't know different op I'm sorry and I keep repeating the same thing then that sorry becomes work and so even when I accept your apology and go back into relationship with you and I'm not just talking about Romance I'm talking about professional friendship family Che I've also just dismissed you because delivering you or assisting you will have taught you what accountability looks like for me so what does that look like I mean as we break that down like what is how do you actually become accountable for more than just saying I'm sorry or yeah I'm guilty or I did that like where does the real repentance occur I love that accountability isn't just I'm sorry it's a plan of action to shift our pivot in a different way next time around so really I don't need an apology from you for you to be accountable so you can be accountable on your own without saying I'm sorry right cuz accountability shows up in our next engagement where we encounter the same circumstance I see you do a different action that's accountability don't repeat the same offense that's accountability and the other thing is if I don't know a different or new action to exhibit then I should be able to have enough sense of self and confidence in me and save space with you because if I choose you I trust you so you know we got to start choosing better as well okay I should be a accountability I should be able to come to you and say Nick listen I am you know very apologetic for what I did I I don't want to do it again but I don't know another way like I don't know how to show up different for you I don't know how to speak without emasculating you I don't know how to dig without gutting you out I don't know how to tell you I don't like something without excuse my language can I curse for a minute without saying [ __ ] you you get what I'm saying I don't know how to tell you you hurt my feelings saying you're a nothing ass [ __ ] if we don't talk real let's talk real I don't know that so at what point do you help deliver me as your friend or as your woman as your wife that says can you show me different without sabotaging me without abandoning me without causing more pain in my trauma by leaving me because I didn't do hold on what was your ideology of what I should have done now we're talking about codependency that's real talk that's heavy you you diving in deep immediately I mean even when it comes like you said in any type of relationship like both sides taking accountability I mean I wish there was a a better word or I mean you described it you know very eloquently but it's it really is both sides holding true when they do come to whatever the the interaction is to say I'm owning my [ __ ] you owning your [ __ ] and the goal to me it's always like what is are we looking for resolution or we just really here to emote and say this is my piece and you got to hear me which those are there's opportunity for those spaces too like before like I need to get this out I need to to emote I need to build this but hopefully in our interaction there's going to be some sort of you know solution and resolution at the end of the day let me ask you this do you believe just personally you that solution or resolution looks like us coming into agreement not always we can agree to disagree uh but for me and just like I said I'm on your couch right now I I don't know if it's the Libra in me if it's my abandonment issues as a child I'm quick to be like we agree to disagree so I'm out I'll run I'll I'll detach I'll act like you know I'll shut down I internalized uh and I know that's not healthy but just as as a man to stay away from conflict with uh any woman in my life I'll just be like we agree to disagree you can have that but who taught you that you you sabotaged to avoid conflict cuz that's not true but who taught you that where did you learn that from I mean it just I just over I mean years of therapy uh but but more like and I CU I wouldn't say sabotage more say but I just know that I tend to to run or to avoid fleeing is sabotaging is it always fleeing is sabotaging or is that safety because cuz if I engage and especially if one or two parties become hostile in the engagement I much rather be like you know what I'm gonna wait till we calm down I'm but what is hostility unresolved pain right so so so if you're fleeing from unresolved pain then what do you what is the resolve what is the benefit of fleeing from unresolved pain it just causes more unresolved pain I'm saying pain causes pain and hurt people hurt people so in that sense if in our heightened interaction yes if we here with it I'mma check out I'm going to because you're saying things that are hurtful got therefore I'm going to want to say things that are hurt so let me ask you this what tool would you could you use that could desate the hostility and bring y'all to a safe space cuz let me say this walk the door wrong answer I'm leaving and I will be back when we are that is your dysfunctional Norm absolutely and that stem from what you said abandonment all abandonment does is make you create a little boy who was taught that he didn't matter who was taught that that he was not honorable he was not respectful he has very low value who grows into a grown man who projects that exact value talking about me in my face you know who projects that exact value on every woman he comes in contact with and so he overcompensates for things outside of him not things inside of him which makes him extremely codependent and we're get into that with all your baby M we're wait a little longer get into that we can get into it now the tool yeah we're get there the tool for deating cuz I want everyone to know this tool this is not for you or for me I mean because I I was the one that used to go hosle I know I was very I can go hosle and emasculate and say a lot of cutting things and if a dude didn't pivot we was it was going to be some pivoting if you didn't pivot I understand it but the tool is emotional intelligence the tool is to and what is emotional intelligence to you emotional intelligence is knowing how to assess out the situation and understand feel for someone else and have the empathy for the moment that's why I'm removing myself emotional intelligence is is more about you it's about being able to sit in what you feel hold on without the codependency of allowing this person's emotions to penetrate to throttle penetrate that's my word to move my throttle right that's called self-mastery and that's emotional intelligence and so when things get hostile if I implement the emotional intelligence tool and I say hold on Nick baby I'm just trying to have a conversation with you like seriously there's a lot of pain between both of us and I would rather us sit and exchange our pain and facilitate each other then us turn on each other and and and and project more pain onto each other are you in a place to do that right now or do you need some time before we can do that that's emotional intelligence nine times out of 10 that dearm the other person if the person's not there yet then it's still healthy for you to say look look doc I want to do that but I can't do that right now so I need a moment but that but that's still emotional intelligence on your end that's too emotionally intelligent people communicating but what is when some when someone says I'm putting this EQ aside you know and and therefore I need to emote right now it's I can you know if I said exactly what you said to someone that I was uh in in discussion or uh inflamed with you're inflamed at that moment they're going to say I want to hear that [ __ ] like I feel like this right now and the tone in what you're talking to me is uh you're actually being passive aggressive you're using all these biging and and you're trying to make me feel inferior and and you're you're uh gaslighting me and all these other fascinating terms that we' come up with when really I'm like I'm just trying to find resolution I always say it's not about who's right it's about what's right and even in those scenarios if someone is enraged if someone is feeling pain they don't want to be like the thing like I always say with women never tell a woman to calm down never tell a woman to relax you got to let it happen in the way I'm not going to tell you to calm down I'm not going to tell you to relax I'mma leave and I'll be back when we can actually have you're going to leave when the pain level is at a 10 you're going to return the pain level is going to be at a 20 let me tell you why because I'm be going long enough then because you left her in her pain to fin for herself what which is exactly what happened to you as a little boy and that wait but but look what it created in you not saying that you're not a Wonder forever I'll be back when you calm I mean cuz I don't want to say it right right you can say it calm down to me I'm emotionally intelligent I can take it when things are a little bit more chill cuz otherwise like you said it's going to be St all over the house and be honest about this this answer always how when you've left obviously you've done this is your Norm you've done this all your life when you've left for long enough to come back how many times have you in that particular IND had the same damn argument over and over again that wasn't the last time y'all had that I don't know if this is a trick or this is manipulation but if you stay gone long enough they get worried about you and and then they happy to see you when daddy's home right right okay but but that's but that's also pily that's in the that's in the moment though baby later on in that relationship but y have Revisited that same because because we have to resolve resol but there's no no one's enraged in that moment because Time Heals most wounds tell let me tell you why cuz feelings cost issues feelings cause issues yes feelings cause issues absolutely not emotions okay two different things break that down so you know the the the the culture term you and your feelings yeah that's a problem yeah but when I'm sitting in my emotions I'm feeling right so that I can deal absolutely and so that I can heal yeah emotions are more than just feelings right and so if I am emotionally intelligent which is mental health yes and you and I or we or whoever you're with are taking the initi the initiatives to become better within their mental because mental health is subjective we talked about this mental health is not just a diagnosis in the DSM mental health is very subjective mental health is if something is causing you impairment then that is a mental health issue it doesn't have to be a diagnosis it doesn't have to be depression if it's causing an impairment and your mental health is skewed you have a mental health issue at that moment because we've been throwing that mental health word around very easily nowadays but to that point to where you just defined it you know cuz some sometimes it feels like a label and it discredits people and then sometimes it feels like an excuse but to to what you're saying is like if it causes an impairment that's now I want to go back to this little argument if you got two abandoned people yes in this situation yeah and one fleas which is abandon now I'm abandoned cuz you fleed me right so you're causing more impairment on but it doesn't matter you're causing more impairment who abandoned you when you were young everyone okay are they back have they came back yeah oh but you still reap the repercussions of their abandonment right yeah okay so it doesn't doesn't make it okay you're still having to deal with that [ __ ] now even though they returned and they came back it doesn't make them coming back atone for what the impact or the impairment they caused are you engulfed in because of that experience so when you leave but it made me stronger in what ways it made me be able to deal in with with what abandonment with you're still not dealing with abandonment no because now I've learned to be like okay and deal with what because if you're fleeing you're not dealing with your emotion no because I understand is a reason and season for multiple things so if I'm going give you the time and the space that you need and we'll handle it when we handle it and and it's not in my hands I give it to the higher power I give it to the Lord and he going to figure it out every relationship is a direct reflection of who we are AB we see in others who we are not who they are yeah okay so like with you only because I'm in a place of of not perfect at all of meaning healing I've done this healing work it's been years I maintain it I do it every day it's literally a lifestyle otherwise I can go back to my dysfunctional norms and and and and nobody's safe there okay not even me not even here but so I say that to say um when I'm looking at you right we see others who we are not who they are I see a man who is extremely broken who has taken his Brokenness and made the best of it who has made many decisions that he feels that was great and contributed to a greatness of a big moving part of his life but also contributed to some demise of a big part of his life who is now trying to figure out how do I take these moving parts and make them a collective whole because I'm feeling a lot of of Brokenness and Division in a lot of stuff that's going on however I see a man who's who at at the core is a a great man has great character wants to be better wants to have better character wants to show up for people better wants to be the best father he could be trying to figure out how he can do that still figuring out a sense of self um stands on his Square stands on business sometimes too much to where standing on that business can mess some things up so what I'm saying is all those things I said I see in you are just the things that I really in me cuz I can't see past myself okay and so when you're in a relationship and you're in this hostile argument or a calm argument and you decide to get up and walk out you're not fleeing from what you keep saying is the argument or her anger you're fleeing from the reflection of yourself so when we think that we're fleeing from this conversation of what you're saying to me I'm fleeing from the very best thing that I need which is reflecting to me how I see you showing up with me because you're just a mirror and so if I can sit in that emotion with you with you have to have that awareness right of saying hold on Nick look like it's a lot of stuff going on in you right now that just don't sit right with me because it's a direct reflection of who I am you ain't have to read me like that but you know only and let me go further because we're talking about black men so we're talking about fleeing yeah okay we're talking about fleeing we can blame it on abandonment issues I'm okay with that but if you want to talk about accountability black men when they're fleeing anything fleeing from being a father fleeing from being a husband fleeing from the argument fleeing from accountability they're just fleeing from thems and that's why there's no personal self-growth because words don't teach experience does and so if I can't sit in this experience with you then what the hell am I learning from this experience if every time I flee I go back to my dysfunctional Norm where is the growth Within Myself at this point it it becomes not even about you it becomes about Dr Bryan trying to be better for me trying to be better for my husband who is to come for my kids when I do happen to have children because I'm not married or have kids yet but I always make sure any man I'm dating any engagement on in I'm here to make sure I can sit in this I can atone in this and I can get the experience that I want to take and create a new Norm with because dysfunction didn't work for me and it ain't working for you so what I would say to that CU I agree with everything that you said the only addendum or additive that I would put in [Music] um I feel like the fleing whether it's in general like you talk about what black men do or specifically if it's you and I in in uh a heated scenario I'm fleeing from the lack of control okay because when there is no control there's chaos and and in that setting if you on high I'm on high and I know that this can only bubble over because neither one of us have control of the moment or of our emotions it's only going to get worse so and even in that with using that same you know analogy of how black men just flee from from the because we don't haveone has the capacity to flee but because our topic is mostly black men and mental health I want to make it clear black women flee too but we're talking about black wom we're personalizing it with me that is who I am because I only run I'm like you know what I don't have control over this situation and as I'll be back when I have control but not but okay I love that this is so good what is control the song Janet Jackson put out right exactly you see see don't deflect bring it back here don't deflect you see he just fleeing that's he fleeing bring it back bring it back you may at the root of control what is control for one it's an illusion what what is at the root of control uh I mean ego uh okay then that's fine what is ego me I mean my what is ego the root of ego is what is protecting my vulnerabilities it's an insecure little boy that's what the root of of control is because it's an illusion okay because when when we control anything we're talking no it's not illusion when when you yelling I'm yelling no we're talking about the control piece right but that's what I'm saying neither one of us have control because our emotions are on high but you have two people who are at the peak of a mental health freaking breakdown a mental health issue so again the way that you gain control is by two things you use two tools you cannot shift or change anything about you unless you shift or change your experience so as long as you keep fleeing that's why I'm shifting my ass out but that's what you but that's what you've been doing but that allows you to stay in abandonment that allows you to stay I'm comfortable with my abandonment because you are in your dysfunctional Norm that you've become comfortable but it's worked it's become a superpower but you've learned to survive in it you're not thriving in that there's not a th that's not thriving you're surviving in that okay and so anytime you are surviving and not thriving there is no cape there is no superpower there's no superpower in a lack of mental health and there's no superpower but it's worked for me like you said I mean you you read me well you know work for you you know why it work for you I'm going go there and it's probably going to be okay go ahead this and this is we want we got two minutes left in our first session with all due respect sery to all the women that you've encountered ladies I'm saying this the reason why it's worked for you is because you have chosen and to pray on low functioning women who don't have the emotional intelligence no I'm going there who will allow you to do that Nick and when I say allow it's not a control thing when I say allow I'm not saying that she sits across you and says This Is What You Won't Do you're crossing a boundary Nick I disagree this is why I disagree I mean one because I because one you going to make got to go protection but no but even but I'm saying because you can say from the from the all the high value women that are say value but okay I'm just I'm giving compliments but I'm just saying for the people even you know of them being cuz first of all low functioning women will allow you to function low with them Nick you could not function that low so this everyone's low functioning at some point in their life you cannot function low with a woman of my functioning not because not because I'm superior listen to me say this really quick not because I'm superior to any other woman but because I do have leverage I've been in my field for 17 years so we get that but I've done the work meaning you won't have an opportunity to get hostile with me and you may want to flee but fleing would not get you a pay off with me minute I'm not the Hostile individual this is what you that's my point did you hear what you what you just said we said the same thing you would never have the opportunity to get hostile with me yeah cuz I control myself hold on okay I have full control of my but in your s cuz that's what I'm saying because even only reason I say what I disagree because at some point we've all been low function and we have to accept that so so to to to label that it's like all right well every at some point everybody's going to be in their in their in their low State everybody's going to be vulnerable everybody's going to feel empty everybody's going to yearn something and when it comes to relationships the beauty of a great relationship is where I'm weak you are strong so therefore or I have dealt with some people that balance me and are equally yolked and at times have I been manipulative and pray on certain things cuz I'm a man and but not all men do that we don't want to we don't want to blank all and do not pray and manipulate Not all men first of all all humans pray and manipulate but in a man in a relationship not in a Praying way if I see that I can say okay I feel like I need this and this person has this I'm going to do and say what whatever I need to do to get that but but Nick again Law of Attraction we attract who we are despite of who we think we are you used the word you said women who are equally yolked to you yeah equally yolk comes in many different facets 100% balance if anything they have been equally yolked to your low functioning dysfunction that you have learned to survive in because I use my tools to to cuz first of all let's let's you're acting as if I'm entering every scenario with the full meat and and we all every time someone meets someone you're meeting their representative I know how to turn on the perfect man so therefore I may have manipulated a situation and therefore so it's to no discredit to anyone else I've come into every situation I can be God-fearing celibate the one that you want I can tell you everything that you want in a man and show you that I can open the doors lay down the cloak send the jet do it all to be like oh my goodness no I've never and then toxic Nick shows up and you like this [ __ ] got me gave me the draws and I ain't heard from them what you said is perfect no what you said is perfect because you named all of the low functioning superficial things that a low functioning woman would fall into low function baby any woman any woman or man or the M any person who's done the work who gained a sense of self who's worked on their paint Pockets who's worked on their trauma going to who they're going to be vulnerable they're going to l sleeping alone you I wish I had a strong man going to be imperfect but that person would want a strong healthy functioning man not a low function a [ __ ] with some good hands not a low functioning man no that's that's what I'm saying is the difference but every woman you can't doc you can't sit here and say that but you're speaking from your experience which makes it better I'm saying cuz your experience of these women is that they fall short for a jet in a good meal and a good man who says he goes to church a high and and and let me go further and a big penis but okay so let me go but a high but again a high functioning I'm not even talking about value a high functioning woman who done the work the work I'm trying to hear what this high functioning woman is for a high functioning woman you cannot send a jet and be toxic and she will go on the she don't know I'm toxic yet a high functioning woman wouldn't even attract you baby because it's Law of Attraction stick with me just stick with me please explain this regate your emotions and stick with me regulate your emotions and stick he listen what what is Law of Attraction we attract who we are despite who we think we are absolutely think we are absolutely okay so a high functioning woman is not going to attract by just by default by her calibration she's not attracting a man who is listen not who is not perfect the man has got all kinds of mess so does she so does she but when it comes to the level of her calibration and functioning and mental health and doing the work she's going to trct that at which she is that at what she leads with so let me say this do I get on private jets that I pay for myself absolutely have I had a man do a wonderful beautiful things for me absolutely have I had rocks and this and caught off weddings of course but let me say this prior to me doing the work in being a high functioning woman I attracted low functioning men so you saying you're a high functioning woman who attracted L what I said I said prior to me doing the work and becoming a high functioning woman my low functioning self attracted low functioning men hold on that you know why I attracted them because I needed low functioning to feed low functioning okay a hold on hold on a low functioning man cannot feed a high functioning woman and a low functioning woman can't feed a high functioning man and so what I'm telling you is there is no equally Yol there if a high functioning woman is uh-uh a gallon okay okay and a low function in human being let's just go human being not even man we got props we got props this is a high function person this the high functioning woman right here just person let's just person cuz you got men who are high functioning cuz I am a calibrating attracting y'all and I love y'all so let me come back let me bring it back you whereever you make believe [ __ ] right listen so high functioning is a gallon low functioning is a pint okay okay if low functioning pour every single thing that he or she needed into this you guys tell me how much is missing how much is lacking how much is there low functioning could never hang with the high functioning if high functioning poured everything they had into low functioning it would overwhelm them they couldn't facilitate they couldn't sustain they might be able to do hold on like Nick said they might be able to attract but there's no type of sustaining here so how long you want to sustain for low functioning is comfortable being low functioning that's about accountability that's accepting who you are because with all due respect this high functioning person yeah is that sounds a little delusional it's not cuz if it's called doing the work Nick if because if you're that high functioning you going to be high functioning by your damn self there's no like who are you going to be with Nick stop that was so perfect I swear no I love that that right that would that's it that should be the whole snit bit of the show say it no say it one more time please please say that one more time be that high function you be high functioning by your damn self okay now you understand why people who are in my field seriously who have done a lot of work and this is just real this no all jokes aside who've done the work we're not [ __ ] perfect we are far from it I don't even want to be perfect I don't even care about it but I want to be healthy meaning I just want a peace of mind while I'm being imperfect I want to be able to have a conversation with you and it be from a place of disagreement agreement but still love and respect and we walk away right so that's just being healthy not perfect yeah however folks who are in my field or who have already got to a place of high functioning got to a place of obtaining a piece of my not Perfection it is you're exactly exactly right it is a much smaller pool and so can it get lonely sometimes up there not just from dating I'm talking about from friends I'm talking about from people who just don't get my conversation on from people who I say to them Nick I'm not trying to fuss with you listen I just want to have a conversation and we are projecting pain onto each other so can we sit here and process our pain so we can produce a healthy relationship when emotionally intelligent people but when you're saying that you're that person who's High function emotionally intelligent that's all high functioning means is you're emotion intelligent to govern yourself you know to Master on yourself you done the work you use the tool you're doing it every single day it's a lifestyle right not just a preventative or intervention it's a [ __ ] lifestyle then what happens is when you start to lead with that you said it perfectly about 15 minutes ago the person who's low functioning says are you gaslighting me no I'm trying to be healthy with you hold on oh but but I want to talk this out we we can deliver not dismiss oh now [ __ ] you I can't take this so what happens the gallon and the the P too much what' you say it's too much okay so that leads for the gallon person to do what have have to respectfully healthily have a conversation that still says listen I would have loved to have this with you but it seems like we are just not there and because of that you know I wish you best but it's not fling it's just a healthy conversation that leaves you not abandon leaves you not abandon because I've had this convers so what happens is you're right the folks who are functioning at that high level the high vibrations in your words is it always easy to find those same people no this is why you have show this is why you have this platform Nick so that we can teach people how to get there so we all could be in a place of not Perfection but a place of Peace of Mind a place of emotional intelligence and I can love you and stick by you even when I don't agree with what you doing you see how we brought that home that's mental health there it is that's mental health and I think we should pause here for our first session we already went over but you did that yo uh I know the comments is going to go crazy uh like subscribe Dr Bryan is in the building uh please join us again because this is to be continued we got another session coming right here on Council culture

Channel: Counsel Culture Show

Views: 17,812

Keywords:

Id: ZmjPDQgy_wI

Length: 37min 4sec (2224 seconds)

Published: Fri Apr 12 2024