6 Steps to Make Your Dreams Come True Jack Canfield

hi i'm jack canfield co-author of the best-selling chicken soup for the soul books was always my dream to write a best-selling book that would make a difference in the lives of others my book was first rejected by over 33 publishers well one publisher finally took it and it's now sold over 33 million copies worldwide i was able to make my dreams come true and in this program i'm going to teach you how to make your dreams come true so let's jump into these six steps of success that we're talking about here step number one you have to decide what you want now that sounds so obvious but so many people go through life not being really clear about what their goals are what their vision is what their dream is i have a cartoon at home that i have above my desk and it's a cartoon of two spiders sitting at the end of a sliding board and the kind of kids slide down there's a big spider web across the place where the kids will come off and one spider's looking at the other and he says you know if we pull this off we'll eat like kings and even though it's a little gross it makes a point but i want you to have a big vision a big vision i want you to go for everything it is you want in life and to get in touch with that from your heart so we were told a lot of us you can't have that you can't do this forget all that if none of that mattered and anything was possible what would you want so one of the phrases i have is ask what not how because many of you don't know how you're going to get it if you don't see how you can achieve it then you don't you're afraid to commit to it well i can't see how to have a perfect relationship with my husband so i don't want to commit to that because i don't want to be a failure i can't see how i could ever get medical school given the income we have so i don't want to commit to that what i'm going to teach you here is if you'll make the commitment and do these other steps that we're going to talk about the how will show up along the way see my ideal vision there's no drive-by shootings in los angeles my ideal community world there's no hunger there's no illiteracy there are no gangs people say oh that's impossible well it's only possible if we start to visualize it decides what we want and once we commit to it as i said the how will show up and finally are there any accomplishments you want to have before you die maybe you want to get that phd i want to write a book or publish a letter to the editor in the newspaper or make that trip around the world whatever it is for you now don't let your mind tell you it's not possible i want the inner child in you no you know the one that says come on mommy i want to buy that you know we can't afford that okay i want the little kid in there to think anything is possible to decide what you want and the spiritual part of this comes in i believe that in your heart you really know what's for your highest good and if you let yourself go there then you're going to be lined up the old not thy will or not my will but thy will and so i want that energy to come through as your life purpose and we can't go into that like great depth in a small seminar here that we have in terms of time but again this is not about your ego needs it's about what you really need to do to feel fulfilled to feel filled full of yourself and if you'll go there and trust yourself then you get a level of satisfaction you can't believe the last part of this is you got to tell other people what your vision is now a lot of teachers out there say oh don't tell people what your vision is because they'll reign all over your parade and you know then you'll lose your enthusiasm remember surround yourself with positive people and if someone does rain on your prey just say thank you for your contribution right because they're doing the best they can to be of value to you maybe they think you can't do it just say thank you move on go to someone else okay but as you start to share your vision and your dreams with others some people are going to go i have that same dream you know i'll help you martin luther king stood up and said i have a dream a lot of other people went hey i share that dream let me line up i'll march with you and eventually something started to happen in terms of fighting racism in our culture but it had to be someone that stood up so other people could attract to it and you'll be surprised who will become attracted to your dream the second step to success that's so critical is you've got to set specific goals and objectives for your vision or your dream it's a nice thing to say i want a winter home in hawaii but that won't do it it's got to be measurable it's got to be in time and space how much do you want my when now let me give you a good example of this why it's so important to make a list of goals i tell people in my seminars you want a goal or an objective a measurable thing for every part of your vision and i think you want to have 101 goals we really go for it now john goddard who we wrote about in our first chicken soup for the soul book when he was 15 he set a list of 127 goals that he wanted to achieve now he's sitting in his dining room with his dad and all these people are coming over to dinner these are the big successful people in town and he's listening to him talk to his dad as a successful businessman saying things like you know i wish before i'd started my business i'd traveled around the world because now it's too late or i wish i had spent more time with my children or i wish i had read the encyclopedia or wish i'd learned music i wish i'd learned to play an instrument and he said i don't want to live my life and get to be 50 60 and go i wish i had or to live on what one of my friends called someday isle right someday i'll do this someday i'll do that and you never get there and so he made a list of 127 goals now these were not minor goals these were things like visit the great pyramid in egypt visit the great wall of china visit the vatican meet the pope learn three languages read the encyclopedia shoot out a candle with a 22 rifle from 100 feet fly an airplane learn to you know control a boat learn to type 150 words a minute all these different things and he's achieved 115 of those 127 goals the last one he just accomplished was learning to play polo now the guy's in his 70s and polo i understand is a pretty strenuous sport in his polo class was sylvester stallone the actor what a neat what a neat life i mean this guy's the real indiana jones right he's doing all this stuff out there his next goal that he's training for is to start at the the mouth of the yangtze river or the beginning of it and sail all the way down all the way through china and he's getting ready to go do that so he wakes up every morning he knows exactly what he's working toward he's got a blueprint for his life what about you do you have a blueprint for your life and if not why not let's look at this idea of specificity for a minute like a winter home in hawaii very nice but if i say i will own a two-bedroom beachfront fill on the west coast of maui hawaii by june 1st 2003 does that sound a little more clear yeah and until you get specific like that the creative part of your brain won't jump in and decide how to help you get there and that's why a lot of people never get their dreams because they don't make them specific enough you got to get real nitty-gritty break it down how much by when i want a better relationship with my husband what does that mean but if i say i want to spend an hour a week sitting opposite my husband talking about real things that matter no tv on eye to eye communication now that we can measure did you do it for an hour want to have more fun what does that mean but what if i say i'm going to listen to comedy albums twice a week for a minimum of an hour you're probably going to have more fun so make it specific make it make it real some people say you know i want our business to increase well how much by when want the reading scores to go up in a school how much by when until you have that you're not going to make progress and so many people's dreams never get completed because they're not clear about the specific number of how much by whim i told you earlier in the program we said we're going to sell a million and a half books in a year and a half and that directed our behavior recently we just said we're going to sell a million books in one day we had 101 bookstores involved in a book signing we're going to try to be in the guinness book of world record for the largest book signing ever done now i don't think we sold a million books maybe we sold a couple hundred thousand but by holding that question and trying to figure out how to do it it moved us toward that goal and maybe it'll take us two years to figure out how to sell a million books in one day but it gets the thinking to expand out into that arena is this making sense okay so you want to have those goals now the other thing you want to do is break your goals down many of you have big goals end hunger in the world that's a pretty big goal you know have world peace achieve a certain level of spiritual oneness with god or life big goals when you first look at it it's kind of overwhelming but what if we were to break that down into little steps it says okay i want to go to college and get a phd gosh i'm only a high school student but the next step would be finish the math class get an a in this write for a brochure from a college get a catalog pick one or five colleges that i want to apply to you know just keep breaking it down to little steps and then figure out how to get all those steps done and put a date by each step and then start doing the plan someone said if you fail to plan you're planning to fail does that make sense yeah absolutely some of one of my friends said success by the yard is hard by the inch it's a cinch so we just break it down into small pieces i had uh i was reading the guinness book of world records because we were thinking about being in there and this guy set a goal to eat an entire bicycle tires and all now how do you do that right well it took him 17 days but what he did is he kept cutting the bicycle up and then melting it down into little swallowable pieces and he ate them i don't know how much stayed in but he ate them right but the point being anything can be done if you break it down small enough makes sense so don't let the bigness of a goal overwhelm you now finally what's the purpose of all this the purpose of all this is not to get the million dollars the rolls-royce the best-selling book all of that that's nice but have you ever known people that had all that and weren't really happy and they've ever known people that had all that and then lost it you know donald trump was really wealthy for a while and then he lost it now he's coming back and all that well that happens it's not the result that's important it's who you become in the process of achieving the result jim rohn said set a goal so big that in the process of achieving it you become someone worth being isn't that an interesting concept because it's not the result if you set a big goal three things are going to show up in your life one is called considerations all the thoughts about why it's not possible all the fears that you have about going out there and doing that thing and finally there are real roadblocks out there in the world there are laws and things that maybe that it's not legal to do that yet or you know it's not zoned for that or all those kind of things you're going to have to learn how to overcome those roadblocks and to learn how to quiet the considerations in your head and learn how to overcome those fears but have you ever done something that was really scary and then the next time you did it wasn't quite so scary then the third time was and pretty soon it's no big deal like the first time i did tv it was scary now it's not such a big deal but you have to go through it right and when you're done you get to have something in your life called mastery and that's the goal the goal is mastery mastering your fears mastering your thoughts mastering your behaviors so that you can do anything you want that can't be taken away from you a friend of mine's house burnt down he was an author he lost all his manuscripts all his research his computer melted everything nothing was safe and you would have thought maybe he'd committed suicide at that point but he didn't what'd he do he said look everything i learned about being an author still in my head you can't take that away from me i know how to talk to editors i know how to write i know how to outline i know how to write book proposals i know how to go on talk shows i'm no longer afraid of that so what you want to do is create goals that are so big and so full of your heart that when you achieve them even if you lose the result the best-selling book they always fall off the best-seller list my publisher over here will tell you that they just don't stay on there forever but the reality is you become a master in life now step three is you've got to visualize the results that you want this is probably the most important step of all the six steps maybe the second most important one the top two what does that mean you've all heard people say visualize the goals if it's already achieved think about this have you ever known a kid like a high school kid he's into skateboarding or something and you go into his room and the whole wall is covered with pictures of skateboarding it's like he's surrounding himself with this image of what he wants people say i can see it so bad i can taste it you ever heard that phrase yeah well they they literally can't see it and because they can see it it creates something inside of them that moves them toward the goal let me demonstrate this with you could i have everyone stand up right where you are for a moment and you at home would you stand up to good now we're going to do a little exercise that is intended to literally blow your mind to open it up at such a level that you'll never be the same again in terms of this technique we're talking about so what i'd like you to do is just watch me for a minute then we'll do it the moment i'm going to ask you to put your right arm out in front of you and have your feet about 12 inches apart nice solid stance and then i'm going to ask you to turn as far as you can and when you can't torque your body anymore notice where your hand is pointing mine's right to the right-hand side of that pillar there and then look to what's to the right and left i see the blue window i see the wall there with the painting on it get a clear picture and kind of lock that in like a photograph okay pretend there's a little laser beam pointing off now if you're turning here in the studio and there's somebody there bend your elbow keep turning don't whack them in the head but also don't stop i want your turning only be stopped by your inability to torque your body any further okay everyone ready to do this put your right arm up and go ahead turn as far as you can and when you can't turn any further notice where your hands pointed see what's to the right what's to the left get a real clear picture and then come on back to the middle and lower your arm okay good now if you're willing what i'd like you to do is to close your eyes close your eyes and just imagine that you're lifting your arm up imagine you're moving it across your body the same direction you went last time this time when you get to the spot where you stopped you're going to go another foot or two further without any stress no strain no pain no effort you're just able to go further notice where your hand will be pointing now use the power of your imagination to create a very vivid clear picture make it real make it vivid make it clear make it bright excellent then imagine moving your arm back to the middle down to your side and go ahead and open your eyes okay everyone raise your right arm again and we're going to turn again this time go as far as you can see how far you can go and then come on back to the middle and by show of hands how many of you went further no no no no okay take a seat for a minute and we'll talk about why that happened okay good now let me explain what happens here you had in your mind an experience of reality called how far you went right and then i asked you to put a picture in we'll call it the vision of something you wanted which was to go further that you hadn't really experienced and when you hold those two in your mind simultaneously it creates something in the brain called structural tension it's a mental tension that mental tension wants to resolve itself can only resolve itself one of two ways either you give up on the goal or the goal has to become real now what happens in your brain when you do this and you hold that structural tension remember we talk disciplines of success this is something you do every day as a discipline and when you do it you visualize the goals you want is already achieved and that structural tension makes three things happen number one you start to perceive things out in the world that we're always there that can be resources to help you achieve your goals things that you just didn't even notice before but they were there second you're going to start getting creative ideas oh i could do that third you're going to feel motivated to take action now this perception thing how many of you have ever thought gee i'd like to go to hawaii and then you're at a party about three days later and across the room a room full of 100 people you hear someone say hawaii you ever heard that experience it's like the red sea parts and you go walking do you say hawaii you know you have a condo over there do you ever let people stay in it you know it's like how do we do that well the reticular system in our brain opens up and we perceive more now i'm going to demonstrate this to you very graphically here in the studio and home on tv and i want you to pay attention over here if we could to the monitor and we're going to bring up a sentence on this monitor and i'd like you to read this sentence with me out loud on the count of three we'll all read it out loud one two three finished files are the result of years of scientific study combined with the experience of many years okay then we'll take that off the monitor and what i'd like in a moment we're going to put that back up and when we put it back up we're only going to leave it up for 10 seconds and what i want you to do is count the number of times the letter f f how many times does f appear in that sentence okay and don't say anything out loud keep it to yourself and then we'll see what happens so if we can bring that picture up again for 10 seconds go ahead and look okay now by show of hands how many of you counted three f's in that sense can you raise your hands okay about a third of the audience how many counted four f's one two three four but eight people how many counted five f's about twelve people how many counted six f's about seven people how many people aren't going to raise your hand no matter what i asked got you back there okay good now first question were we all looking at the same sentence or not see there is an objective reality out there let's take a look again and let's see those of you that saw three three f's if we look up on the monitor are those the three you saw yes okay now we can bring that off and those of you that saw more let's bring it up again now if you look there are six f's underlined in that sentence you hear that oh that's what we psychologists call the oh my gosh reaction you know okay now here's the deal just because you didn't see the extra fs does that mean they're not there no they're still there whether you see them or not do you think some people see more resources out in the world than you do more solutions to problems more entrepreneurial opportunities than maybe you do more people who look friendly they can get a hug from more money that's available for loan see everything's out there all the solutions to your problems exist but we don't see them and partially we don't see them because we've never learned this concept of how to get our brain to open up and let this reticular system in the back let that information in do you ever drive down the street and notice a house and go where'd that come from and your husband or wife goes honey that's been there for three months you know and literally you just didn't see it was like a blind spot but what happens when you learn this technique all of a sudden you start seeing more 1983 the australian sailing team had never won an america's cup ever and the coach had a new idea he said let's try this visualization stuff he made a tape and on this tape he did a narration of the australian team beating the american team and it was something like you know we're going around the last buoy were three boat links ahead of the americans and they had all the sound effects in the background the wind and the sails the water going by and the little lines hitting the mass and all that stuff that you associate with that and this tape went on for about 20 minutes it was a little faster than the actual race and they would imagine beating the americans now he made the team listen to this tape every day twice a day for three years someone just said oh my gosh now when they finally went to race the americans it was like not them again how many times do we have to beat these guys it was like of course we can beat the americans their whole attitude was totally different and in fact they came in and they won the america's cup so the idea is that you can use this in any aspect of your life whether it's sports whether it's you know losing weight whether it's getting better grades in school learning three whatever when we come back from the break i'm going to show you how to use this power of visualization in education i'm going to show you how it was used for example in new orleans to take a school where the dropout rate was 86 percent the kids never graduate high school and they turned that around in five years to 16 percent using this technique so stay with us come on back [Music] okay let me demonstrate to you more than anything i can think of the best way to do it the next step step number four because it's really critical that you get this all these steps kind of have to happen together all right this could probably be the most important one the one that if you were to do this alone and pay attention the feedback would probably get you where you want to go i have here in my pocket i believe a 50 bill if this 50 bill were available and it is i'm going to show you the one secret that separates winners from losers more than anything else okay so if this was available who would want [Laughter] thank you all right now don't go away yet come back tell us your name debbie what did debbie do that no one else in the audience did she got up and she took action see too many times we sit around and we wait and we hope and we dream and we affirm and we pray and we meditate we do all that and all that's important it's part of the process but at certain point the opportunity shows up and if you don't act you get to sit and not have 50 okay so let's give her a hand for coming up here and doing it so step number four is what take action take action one of my favorite quotes is by henry wardsworth longfellow he said the heights by great men reached and kept were not attained by sudden flight but they while their companions slept were toiling upward in the night what does that mean you got to work you got to do some doing this you can't just sit around and hope it'll happen one of the steps one of the actions you need to take is called asking and many of us see we wrote a book mark and i wrote a book called dare to dare to win and it was a book of all these kind of things and people went out and read the book and still a lot of people weren't successful and we thought what's the problem here and as we began to analyze and interview people we realized one of the main things that was blocking most people was the fear of asking for what they wanted they wouldn't go up and just say can i borrow money will you support my dream will you volunteer for school will you lend me your car whatever it is they need they were so afraid of being rejected and so we wrote a book called the aladdin factor how to ask for and get everything you want and we were doing all that research we ran across a girl named marquita andrews and marquita andrews was the living example of what we call ass gas gas gas gas gas gas gas gas because you're gonna have to ask a lot of people and marquita her mother when she was a little girl came up to her and said you know marquita i have a dream my dream is to travel around the world but i also have a dream for you i want you to graduate college problem is i'm a waitress i don't see how i can underwrite both dreams on a waitress's salary but i'll make a deal with you if you'll go to college and agree that after you graduate you'll take 25 percent of your income for the first number of years and put that in savings to send me around the world then i'll pay for your college education but if you're not willing to do that then i don't know if i want to pay for your college education well what is she she's like seven or nine at the time she goes sure deal you know well later that year she joins the brownie scouts and the brownies are part of the girl scouts and they came out with their annual cookie drive and they had a contest that you're a girl who sells most cookies wins trip for two around world marquita says i'm getting out of this one easy right so she starts selling cookies like you can't believe now in her first year as a brownie scout she sold 3526 boxes of girl scout cookies someone just said no way most women who sold girl scout cookies if you sell 300 or 400 boxes that is a big deal 3526 how'd she do it ass gas gas gas gas gas gas gas gas she lived in new york high population concentration right she would go into high-rise apartment buildings and condos and as people would come down in the morning and back from work she would just be there did you buy your cookies yet do you buy your cookie would you want to buy some cookies and if she bought one they said we want to buy two don't you know people should just ask ask ask then one day she finds herself at 14 years old she wrote a book called how to sell more cookies condos cadillac's computers and everything else and she was the keynote speaker at radio city musical to the million dollar round table of insurance salesmen all people who had sold over a million dollars in commissions and all this stuff and she's up there talking to a thousand people at the end of her talk she says i want you all to look under your seat you'll find a three by five card take that out and write a number between five and ten on the card so everybody did and she said that's how many boxes of girl scout cookies i want you to buy for me today as you leave here that day she sold 7 000 boxes of girl scout cookies she's in the guinness book of world records before she retired she sold over 32 000 boxes that astounding hasn't been beaten yet but what does she do ask gas gas gas gas gas cask very powerful tool now she had one final clause little phrase she says s-w-s-w-s-w-s-w what does that mean some will some won't so what someone's waiting so if you ask enough people eventually someone's gonna say yes if i asked everyone in this room do you have a red car eventually someone would say yes it doesn't matter if you ask enough people you're going to get your dream met now we're going to come back in just a moment and when we do i'm going to teach you a word that's going to get you out of the problem of what happens when you ask for something and people say no and this one word if you knew if you knew this word you learned it and you used it can actually get you anything you want in life so stay tuned come on back we'll show you how to make your dreams come [Music] thank you thank you okay thank you now i said before the break i teach you one word how to deal with no when you get a note from somebody and again i'd like you to write this down write it in your brain if you don't have anything to write it with on paper and so forth and here's the here's the word it's very simple when someone says no to you what i want you to say to yourself real loud inside your head is the word next let's just practice that so if i say no what are you going to say absolutely one more time no now what does that mean ask somebody else absolutely how many people live on the planet 5 billion people someone wants to do what you want to do someone wants to get involved in your dream someone wants to support you some you might have to ask a lot of people remember ask gas gas gas gas gas gas gas so when they say no you say next and here's another clue most people don't realize if you ask somebody and they say no does that mean you can never come back and ask them again no little kids are so good at it mommy can i go to the store with you no oh come on mom please let me go to the store with you they go away mom you are gonna let me go to the store with you and they wear you down you know so that's another thing you can next time can be right so don't let no stop you no just means get creative get get going now what stops people from asking what stops people from doing it's something called fear we're all afraid we're afraid we're gonna look stupid we're afraid we're going to get rejected i love this person who did the acronym fvar stands for fantasized experiences appearing real or false evidence appearing real because when you close your eyes and you fantasize something like you're not going to be able to pay your bills or they're going to take your house or you're going to flunk out of school then your body reacts like it's real i was flying to orlando in a plane not too long ago and this woman was sitting next to me and as we took off she started like lifting herself out of the seat i said what are you doing she said i'm making myself lighter so the plane will take off now i knew we'd had a failure in american physics education right and i also noticed her knuckles were all white and i said are you a little afraid she says yeah i guess i am i said well we're we're headed orlando i guess that's where i'm going you're going she says yeah i said where are you going down here so i'm going to disney world to visit my children they're going to be there and my grandchildren i said well close your eyes for a second indulge me i'm a psychologist she said okay so she closed her eyes i said what are you imagining right now she said well i see the plane blowing up in a fireball at the end of the the runway i said well no wonder you're scared you know listen make anyone crazy and so then i had her close her eyes and imagine being at disney world and i said what's your favorite attraction she said it's a small world so i said imagine you're in the little thing and you're going through it's a small world and all the little people are dancing and singing i actually started going it's a small world anyway and all of a sudden she relaxed her breathing deepened and this was what was so powerful nothing outside of her had changed we're on the same plane going down the same runway but what she changed was her response she started visualizing a positive outcome rather than a negative outcome and her physiology reacted same thing we've been talking about all along now let's look at this fear the biggest fear i think that stops most people from asking is the fear of what rejection so let's say that i ask what's your name i go over to susan i say susan would you have dinner with me tonight let's say she says no i go oh everyone goes oh jack's been rejected it's so sad but let's look at it objectively did i have anyone to eat dinner with before i asked her did i have anyone to eat dinner with after i asked her did my life really get worse stayed the same right if i apply to harvard and don't get in wasn't in harvard before i applied i'm not in harvard after i played and most of you have spent your whole life not going to harvard and survive just fine right so it's not a big deal i worked for a optical company that makes lenses half the lenses in your glasses they have 50 of the market so half of you are wearing them and i was the first guy that ever brought in as an outside speaker for their sales meetings and i got there early in the day and i went out and some guys golfing and stuff and i went up to people and i said do you know who the top two or three uh performers in the company are and they'd all go oh yeah it's bob and mary and joe and i say well great well that night i went into the group about 300 people and i said do you all know who the top three performers in the country company are everyone said oh yeah it's bob mary and joe i said so you all know who's like selling many many many millions of dollars more than you are oh yeah i said now by show of hands how many of you have ever gone up to them and asked them to show you what they do to sell so much you know not one hand went up in that room with 300 people isn't it interesting they knew who had the information but they wouldn't ask them i said well why don't you ask well they might not tell me i say we already don't know so if they don't tell you you still don't know how to get so bad you know it's not so bad but they were so afraid that they might say oh you're stupid i don't want to share with you what i found and i think most of you probably found too if you test it out most people are willing to share what they know they like to teach they like to share they like to be a mentor not everyone will but if they say no what are you going to say next there's lots of top performers out there you can go to we've got to get over this fear of rejection don't let it stop you it's not a big deal just keep asking the questions ask ask ask say next move on nothing happens if you're rejected fear of rejection fear of failure fear of looking stupid fear fear fear stopping us let's look at how to overcome any fear there's a couple different techniques but let's look at what i think is probably the one of the most powerful ones how many of you have seen the book feel the fear and do it anyway remember that susan jeffers wrote this book well think about that feel the fear and do it anyway i'm going to do a little demonstration with you here to show you how this works i'm going to take this chair here i'm going to pretend this is a diving board i'm going to stand up on the end of the diving board how many of you know how to dive off the diving board can you remember when you had to learn to do that you're standing on the end of the board so here i am i'm on the end of the board there's my dad down in the water he says come on jump and i'm dead um he says it's only two feet to the water i says yeah but it's another nine to the bottom of the pool and it's five from the feet to the head here you know it's a long way down he says come on just jump i'm scared can you relate to that how many of you at that point said you know dad i think i'm getting off the board go see a child psychologist i'm going to deal with my fear of jumping in the liquids from high places and when i handle that i'll come back and jump in did any of you do that no what did you do you felt the fear and you jumped anyway right and this is really the principle that works for anything in life you're going to feel fear it's going to show up so what most people let fear stop them they say well obviously then i shouldn't do this thing i'm going to say to you feel the fear and pretend it's like a two-year-old take the two-year-old with you you know it doesn't want to go certain places first day of school so what take it you're the adult treat your fear like a little child but don't let it run you you're bigger than that you're bigger than that the mastery comes from what handling the fear now i had a teacher very profound spiritual teacher teach me once how to take this and even make it deeper so here's what i'm going to teach you too i want you to take your fingers and join your two four fingers together like this everyone do that okay and what i want you to do is repeat after me everyone ready okay goes like this little chant goes like this oh everybody oh what the heck [Applause] go for it anyway let's do that together one more time oh what the heck go for it anyway very good let's see if you can remember that when you're scared oh what the heck go for it anyway then you'll take that action it won't always be the perfect action but if you get into action something's going to happen which leads us into step five which says respond to feedback see when you take a first action is that necessarily going to be the right one no but you can't get feedback unless you take the action and some of us are so afraid of doing the wrong thing we wait until like 18 doves fly over our house in the sign of a cross oh it must be the ideal auspicious day and then we take action well they don't fly over that way too often right so we just have to take an action and see what happens now there's two kinds of feedback what are they positive and negative which one do you like best right positive feels good right you know you're on chat but have you ever had negative feedback and it was valuable right so there's two kinds now how many of you actively solicit feedback in your life you say hey i want feedback on how to be a better parent or a better teacher or how can i be a better salesperson how can we serve your company better right most people don't ask for feedback why don't they ask they don't want to hear it but let's say you're a teacher in school and you don't ask feedback how i can be a better teacher the kids go home do you think they're talking about how you can be a better teacher oh man that teacher she doesn't let us do this and she's so mean and yadda yadda well everyone in town knows but you everyone's talking about it you're the only one not in on a secret if you're not getting along with your wife she's called her girlfriend her mother her sister told the people in the office everything that's wrong with you but guess who she hasn't told perhaps you so it's very important to ask for feedback now i'd like to demonstrate how this works i need another volunteer from the audience who'd be willing to play with me okay what's your name mercedes okay here's a microphone what i want you to do is stand right here by the plants and if you would face me over here and what i'm going to do is i'm going to walk toward you in a moment and you're my goal as i'm walking toward you 100 straight on i want you to say on course you're like a feedback system on course i'm on course if i go even off five degrees you say off course okay and you're going to be doing it like stream of consciousness on course on course on course off course off course on course off course got the idea okay are you ready okay go why aren't you giving me any feedback because i haven't do anything exactly here's the deal if i don't take action i don't get any feedback see that's why the action's so important now we'll we'll start again you ready okay here we go on course course of course of course on course of course off on off on oh on now did i get here was i on course or off course more of the time according to her it was about even wasn't it yeah see i can actually i could be off course more than a month course as long as i respond once i get back on course so the key here is if i take action and listen to feedback eventually i what get to my goal now let me show you how a lot of people deal with feedback it doesn't work stay here and again real fast on course on course of course if i'm moving toward you and of course if i'm not are you ready okay go here's how one person i know deals with feedback on course on course off of it oh do you know anyone it gets negative feedback and then he instantly just cave in yes you've seen that here's another way people deal with negative feedback see if you've ever seen this one you ready okay here we go encore song of course of course you are so negative can't you say anything nice now have you ever seen anyone get angry at the source of feedback that was really useful for them exactly yeah here's how here's how one person i know uh he actually bankrupted three companies three divorces this is how he deals with feedback ready mercedes yes okay here we go of course of course right his favorite phrase was my way or the highway as long as you live in my house you'll live by my rules he was not open to feedback because he would rather be right than successful do you know anyone like that yeah let's give mercedes a hand for volunteers thank you thank you so the key here is to what ask for feedback and when you get it listen to it then correct and keep moving toward your target step number six the last step perseverance keep on keeping on never give up never give up if you've got a goal that's important in your heart don't give up as i said earlier we would have self-published our book if no one else would have published it you got to have that kind of commitment to your goals you may not know this but the average millionaire in america goes bankrupt three and a half times before they become a millionaire i don't know how you go bankrupt to half a time but you can do that statistically walt disney went bankrupt five times henry ford went bankrupt three times remember we did chicken soup for the soul 133 publishers said no when they did the guy that wrote the book mash that became a tv show took him seven years as a high school teacher he wrote at night remember persevere a little bit every time break it down every night he wrote what happened turned down by 18 publishers until morrow bought the book jonathan livingston seagull turned down by 19 publishers louis lamour the great author is 200 books in print got 300 rejections before he ever sold a piece of writing alex haley who wrote roots got a rejection slip every week for four years 200 rejections before he sold his first piece of writing see it takes perseverance fred astaire goes in for his first screen test what do they say can't act bald dances a little he had that framed in his living room after he went on to become what one of the greatest dancing actors singers we've ever seen in our history you don't let other people determine you persevere you hang in there so if you'll make your dreams a priority and if you'll surround yourself with positive people if you take 100 percent responsibility for your life and decide exactly what you want and set specific goals and objectives and visualize your goals is already completed take massive and repeated action respond to feedback make corrections on course off course never give up and i promise you'll start to live an amazing life full of dreams come true now let me

Channel: Helpful Dreams

Views: 112,606

Keywords: jack canfield, chicken soup for the soul, the success principles, personal development, law of attraction, life transformation, jack canfield success principles, how to be successful, jack canfield law of attraction, success, motivational video, the secret, create the life you want, jack canfield books, success tip, visualization, success principles, jack canfeild, life goals, affirmations, motivation, inspiration, success tips, goal setting, goal setting motivation

Id: duePeiuqFX0

Length: 42min 55sec (2575 seconds)

Published: Sun Mar 06 2022