23 things I do not buy or own for my kids and babies | minimalism

so today we are talking about things that I do not buy or own for my babies and for my children so I'll give a little bit of a background I have four kids so with my first baby the first time I became a mom I had everything possible for him I I thought that that's what I needed to be a good mom is to have all of these things and I think that the uh baby industry and all of that really does um really adverti towards moms and especially new moms with all of the products that we think we need to be a good mom or to have a happy baby and so when I talk about baby items this is your sign that you really don't need much to have a happy baby um and it will make your life so much easier with a new baby when you have less stuff and one area that I find kind of interesting is when you have less stuff you can more greatly like feel in tune with your Natural Instincts as a mom instead of having to depend on all of these material possessions to be a good mom all of that's kind of Stripped Away and you can kind of tune into how your instincts are as a mama and so let's get into the baby items first number one the first thing I do not buy for babies is a changing table um I just changed my babies on the bed what I really found useful with my fourth was the reusable um I think they're like changing pads that are meant for a changing table but I didn't use them for a changing table I just you know I would lay the baby on the changing pad and then if for some reason something got on the changing pad then I would just wash it and I would use that every time I would change my baby that's what I did with my fourth baby but before that I just laid them on my bed and I just changed them on my bed and it worked fine I didn't need to have another piece of furniture and never really saw the need for it number two is more than one car seat now in some areas I can see where maybe more than one car seat would be necessary and would add Great Value to some families but in our situation we just had one car seat and really if we're driving as a family somewhere the baby would just go in my car so there wasn't ever a need to have another infant car seat in my husband's car if we were going somewhere the kids would just go in my car and we would drive together as a family and yeah and this also goes for more than one stroller um I would have when my babies were little I had a stroller that had a you know infant car seat adapter on it where I could put the baby car seat but even after that now that I don't have a newborn um I still use the same stroller for my toddlers And I've never seen the need to have you know a bunch of different types of strollers the next one is baby seats baby bouncers baby swings so this is one thing I learned on my fourth baby um before that I had the jump Rus and the bouncy seats and the baby swings and all of the you know things that you can buy for your baby to be placed in and there's nothing there's nothing technically wrong with this at all there's nothing wrong with any of these items this is just again what has worked for me and my kids but what I found is that my babies didn't really want to sit in those things they would sit in them for a few minutes and then I would just end up holding them or wearing them in the baby carrier and I just found them to be a waste of space honestly and a waste of money so by the time I had my fourth baby I said you know I'm not buying a bouncy seat I'm not buying a swing I'm not buying any external piece of furniture for baby besides the bassinet that he was going to sleep in next to me and it worked great the one thing that I did get and I really enjoyed having this was a Boppy which you can use for nursing but I used it to just like lay him on our bed or um on a blanket or something just to kind of like prop him up and I enjoyed having the boy I felt like that worked really well for him when he would do tummy time it worked really well to just kind of have a place to sit him where he was comfortable but I didn't need all the extra pieces of furniture and all the gadgets to like keep him happy mainly what I did is when he was upset I would hold him and I would wear him in a carrier and wrap him up on me and that's where he was happiest and so again if you want a bouncy seat if you want a swing great if it makes your baby happy do it that's what your goal is to keep baby happy and keep Mama peaceful but for me after three kids and not really using them I realized by the fourth I don't need them I have never bought a bottle and that's because I have nursed my babies only um and again I'm this is going to be a common thing I keep saying because I don't want this to come across as your you know you don't need bottles there are situations where you would need a bottle whether you're going to use formula or you're going to pump and feed your baby from a bottle or maybe the mama works and the baby has to take a bottle nothing wrong with that at all I just have never needed to buy bottles because I have stayed home with my babies and have always just nursed on demand and didn't need bottles burp cloths I did this with my I think it was maybe my first two maybe just the first probably the first two I did burp cloths and what I found was they really weren't um big enough to catch the spit up that would happen when you would be burping your baby and it would end up getting on the burp cloth and then it would just keep you know the spit up would go down my back and anyway you don't need the details but it just wasn't as practical as using swaddle blankets and so I'm talking about the muslin swaddle blankets I swear by these I used these for covering up when I was nursing they work great for um car seat covers they work great for swaddling your baby they work great for laying the baby down on the ground for covering the baby as the baby gets older for a blanket um and then they work great for burp cloths and you can just dripe it over your shoulder and have that long blanket there and then wash it and use it as a blanket the next time and so by the time I had my third and fourth I was like I don't need the birp cloths that are advertised I will just use the swaddle blankets and it'll just be like a multi-purpose item that I can use I actually still have the same swaddle blankets I have three left that my kids actually still use even the older ones they will use them just for like playing pretend and sometimes they use them as like superhero capes and they'll like put them on the ground for playing floores lava I don't know they use them and they use them for like their baby doll so anyway they've been a great multi-purpose item that have gotten a lot of use so excess clothing I have always kept my children's wardrobes pretty minimal um specifically after getting into minimalism with the babies that were more involved with minimalism um I just feel like sometimes people think that you need a lot of clothing for kids and for babies and you just you really don't I mean you need several outfits for sure because of you know accidents and things that happened but you don't need the excess that we are told um and so I never had an excess amount of clothes and then also fashion clothes you know the like baby Tuxedos and the baby dresses and things that just look like you're dressing your baby up I've never done that I've just dressed my baby in comfy little footies and like sleepers and onesies and keep them comfortable I don't need to put a tuxedo on my baby you know so yeah fashion clothes and excess clothing the next thing is baby shoes I've never put baby shoes on my baby until they start walking before that I just use socks when they're crawling around and they're little newborns I just use socks and I don't use baby shoes until they you know actually need them so a diaper bag is something I think I guess some people could find Value in if you carry a lot in your purse where you would need like your purse and a diaper bag for me I don't carry that much in my purse very very very simple stuff in my purse so I I found that what worked best is just combining the two and having a purse SL diaper bag and I just had to carry one bag with me so I would have the change of clothes and the diapers and the wipes and the swaddle blanket and everything that I needed to go out with a newborn or a baby and then I just had my few things that I would keep in my purse in the same bag and it cut down and having to carry around two different types of bags so baby laundry detergent I have always just used my you know natural laundry detergent on my baby clothes and you don't need the specific baby laundry detergent you can do the free and clear the things that are not with a bunch of added ingredients and fragrances go to the most natural source of laundry detergent and then just use that for your whole family because then you can cut down on those all those different products that are advertised to us that we need for babies you really don't and baby lotion same thing with like the laundry detergent I would use coconut oil I would use just my natural lotion that I had I didn't see the need to have an extra type of baby lotion when I could just use very natural ingredients and just go to the whole form instead of even baby lotion is advertised as baby lotion but it has a lot of ingredients in it and a lot of different fragrances that I just don't think are necessary for babies okay so moving on to kids items and as we get out of the baby stage and into children's things so the first one is light and noise toys the toys that are very stimulating and lots of lights and noise and flashing lights and stuff it just is so over stimulating to the children but also to Mama I definitely did not do this with my first uh really minimalism came um when I was pregnant with my second so with my first one I definitely had the light up toys and the things that are advertised that your baby needs and it just was so over stimulating for him especially into like toddlerhood where he would play and you could just see that he was getting into like this like like his eyes would just kind of be staring at the toys instead of like really playing with the toys it was just kind of putting him into like this trance almost and anyway so we stopped doing the light up toys and the noisy toys and the things that are just it's not even creative play at this point it's just like watching the lights and noise and over stimulating the children and so there are a few exceptions to this where we do have something that does make noise so we have um like emergency vehicles and like you know police cars and fire trucks those make sirens and I don't mind that but other than that we have no toys that make noise and sounds and playtime is so peaceful and and my kids really just get so much more value out of their toys when they're not over stimulated it helps their minds be able to work a lot better so I know it's very common to have your own iPad per child and my kids don't have iPads or tablets or things like that because I just don't think we need an excuse to be more connected to electronics or screens we have a TV my kids even play video games and they play Minecraft and they have their screen time in that way but I don't need an extra iPad for them and you know to set them up on it and just plug them in some more you know so we have not bought those for our kids um excess toys so I've talked about that a lot where we keep toys very minimal kind of when I was talking about the lightup toys where when you have excess toys it's just going to stimulate the kids more and it's going to be a lot and it's going to be hard to be able to choose what to play with and it's just we don't always need excess so we have very simple toys in this home so character food so you m know what I'm talking about when you're in a grocery store and you see the cereal box that is advertising something about Minecraft or My Little Pony or something on it that is like advertising to the kids to get your parents to buy this when there's no difference between buying the thing that doesn't have the character on it but it's just the trick of advertising that gets to our children which is so messed up but that's a whole other story that I will avoid buying things like that because I just don't see the point I think a lot of times those things are more overpriced because they have Mickey Mouse on them or something and they're not going to be as natural and usually they're just the more junky food normally so we avoid those types of things same thing goes with junkie toys things that are just going to fall apart things that you're in the dollar store and the kids see these tiny little things that are just going to end up in the landfill I have made it a priority to really teach my kids the value in something and is it worth spending this money on it when it's just going to fall apart and it's not even going to add value to your life um so we try to stay away from things that are just junky and just bad quality so same thing goes with the babies as my kid kids and you know as they grow up is excess shoes and excess clothing so my kids clothing is really simple just like mine um I don't do like a specific number that I follow but I do just keep it really simple and if they're not wearing anything we let it go um and then of course we do hand-me-downs which help keep the clothing simple and then shoes they have you know very simple shoe collection they have like some sneakers and they have some sandals for the summer and it's just I I don't see the need to have your kids have all of these shoes I have like two or three pairs of shoes and kids don't need that many pairs of shoes you know like it's just giving them more choices that they have to go through it's giving them more stuff and putting that in their head that they have to have like an excess of stuff and I don't want to teach my kids that this one's funny because I think it's really common and I see this a lot where a a lot of minimalists and more minimal families will have the kids only wear neutral clothing and I don't do that I you know when they're little maybe I have a little more of a say and like when they're babies maybe I like the gray outfits or the tan outfits but as they get older and they want to wear a Spider-Man shirt or a Minecraft shirt or something with like a lot of colors on it like I let them do it they're kids and they want to wear the fun clothing and I let them do that I don't say we're minimal so you have to wear gray white and tan only I just feel like I want to pick my battles and choose what is most important for me to be strict on and what isn't so important and so yeah I'm not strict on neutral clothing for my kids lots of birthday gifts so yes so with birthday gifts we keep things really simple we normally do like a gift that they've really been wanting and we'll do an experience so instead of getting a bunch of birthday gifts that they don't really need and they don't even they're not even asking for um we will do a really fun experience on their birthday so going to the water park or having a swim party or just doing something that's really fun for them going out to their favorite restaurant um we kind of make the whole day about them and so they can choose what to do that day and that's been really cool to just like let them choose like what they want for dinner what kind of activity they want to do for the day instead of just buying them a bunch of material things that they don't even need so I do not keep games on my phone for my kids to play again kind of just back to like the tablets and the iPads I don't want to give my kids another excuse to just be connected to screens all the time and it doesn't mean that I don't let my kids watch TV and movies and play video games like they absolutely have their time doing that but it doesn't need to be in every area of our lives so so they don't need to have the video games and the TV and the movies and the iPad and games on my phone it's just they will go from one screen to the other if I had that and it's not serving them if anything it is going to cause them to have a really low attention span it's going to cause them to not be content and not be able to just be creative and play with their brothers I really want to be intentional about that and the last one is activities and sports that might my kids are not interested in so there is nothing wrong with putting your kids in an extracurricular activity but what I see a problem with is when we put our kids into activities just because we feel like we have to so let's sign up for ballet let's sign up for this class let's sign up for baseball and soccer and football and all of these things because it's just what we're told to do if my kids have an interest in something then I will help support that interest and I will you know involve them in the activity that their minds are really craving but if there's not an interest for it I'm not just going to rush my kids into living A busy life and forcing them to just go with what Society is telling them versus asking themselves what am I interested in what do what do I want to do so I don't really force them into activities just for the sake of being busy and I think that's something that we can learn from as parents too is not just taking on activities and not taking on responsibilities and taking on things just so we can be busy let's be intentional about it and let's see what is adding value to us and what do we want to put our energy into I think it's really important so this is all I have for you guys today I have a feeling I'm probably going to stop filming this video and I bet I'm going to come up with probably 10 other things that I didn't add to this list and if I do I'll make a part two of this but yeah I hope you guys enjoyed today's video and it leaves you feeling inspired that's always My Hope thank you guys for being here in your continued support I will see you in my next video until next time take care bye guys I'll

Channel: Light and Mind

Views: 2,390

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Id: 8TbRbOvGmHE

Length: 20min 1sec (1201 seconds)

Published: Sat Jun 08 2024