13 & 14. Ablazing Grace: I Saw Esau

all right let's pray together we've got a great sermon in store for you this morning father in heaven it's a big day today it's a big day first and foremost because we're alive and there's a whole lot of people that went to sleep last night that didn't wake up today so father we're already ahead of the curve here we have a new day to know you to serve you as Nick just said to worship you and father today's a great day because it's Sabbath and Sabbath is a weekly reminder that you are creator and you are Redeemer and we are your sons and daughters father we've been studying this year through the Old Testament a blazing grace and we are still right in the book of Genesis learning with Abraham Isaac and Jacob learning from their successes and their failures and so today father made that a blazing grace that shined more than two thousand three thousand years ago may it shine in the lives and in the families of our local community father today is also a big day because of the arize graduation and I just pray that as we send out these missionaries to the world many of whom are remaining right here in Australia to do Bible work and other ministry ventures we just pray that your spirit would saturate and fill every aspect of today's service be especially with our sermon time now you've ministered to us in the children's story in the offering and the singing and the praying and that beautiful special item that Sondra and Braden shared with this and now as we turn our attention to the text come and speak to us we pray in the name of Jesus let everyone say Amen open your Bibles with me to the book of Genesis want to give me those slides Levi we continue our study of the Old Testament I'll take that first slide as soon as you can get it to me there we go a blazing grace another look at the Old Testament our sermon this morning is titled I saw Esau it's not really only about Esau I just thought that was really clever title and I wanted to say it from up front all right we began last Sabbath with this quotation from this book right here a book called patriarchs and prophets second religious book I ever read and I want to reread it to you to remind us of what we learned last week to catch us up to speed the author of patriarchs and prophets a woman named Ellen White says inspiration faithfully records the faults of good men those who were distinguished by the favor and God indeed their faults are more fully presented than their virtues had the Bible been written by uninspired persons it would no doubt have presented the character of its honored men in a more flattering light their lives with all of their faults and follies and we're gonna see some faults and follies today are open before us both for our encouragement and our warning if the Bible characters have been represented to us as without fault we with our sinful nature might despair at our own mistakes and failures anybody here make a mistake this week any failures this week all right but seeing where others struggled through discouragements like our own and Concord how did they conquer say it with me that's an what's involved there they conquered through the grace of God we are encouraged in our striving after righteousness as they though sometimes beaten back recovered their ground and we're blessed by God so we too may be overcomers not on our own strength but in the strength of who according to the verse or according to the words up there in the strength I've say it with me in the strength of Jesus very good open your Bibles to Genesis Genesis chapter 25 Genesis 25 as we mentioned last week we're right in the middle of the book of Genesis both numerically there's 50 chapters were in chapter 25 but also thematically because the book of Genesis and no small degree is built around a guy named Abraham and Abraham dies in Genesis chapter 25 so we're right at the fulcrum we're at the tipping point and I just got back as some of you also did from the North New South Wales big camp how many of you were with us this year at NSW big camp raise your hands nice and high good any of you in the connections tent okay a few of you did we have long or short scripture readings in the connections tent this year we had nice long scripture readings and we're gonna do the same thing today we're gonna read a significant portion of Scripture so if you've got your Bible with you you can follow along we're gonna start in Genesis 25 verse 19 if you don't have your Bible just listen in listen to the story this will be a story that will be new to some and familiar to others Genesis chapter 25 verse 19 this is the account of the family line of Abraham's son Isaac Abraham became the father of Isaac and Isaac was 40 years old when he married Rebecca the daughter of Beth ul the aramean from paddan-aram the sister of Laban the aramean Isaac prayed to the Lord on behalf of his wife because she was without a child the Lord answered his prayer and his wife Rebecca became pregnant I love how Aussies say she fell pregnant that's something we don't say in America she fell pregnant it didn't happen by falling I'll let you know that maybe by falling in love but not by falling so Rebecca fell pregnant verse 22 the babies just sold each other within her and she said why is this happening to me so she went to inquire of the Lord and the Lord said to her two nations are in your womb and two people from within you will be separated one people will be stronger than the other and the older will serve the younger when the time came for her to give birth there were twin boys in her womb the first to come out was red and his whole body was like a hairy garment so they named him Esau after this his brother came out and his hand was grasping Esau's heel and so he was named Jacob Isaac was 60 years old when Rebecca gave birth to them the boys grew up and Esau became a skillful hunter a man of the open country while Jacob was content to stay at home among the tents verse 28 is a key verse note carefully verse 28 it is a hugely insightful verse as we seek to understand this family drama of Rebekah Isaac Jacob and Esau verse 28 Isaac who had a taste for wild game loved Esau but Rebekah loved Jakub verse 29 once when Jacob was cooking some stew Esau came in from the open country he was famished and he said to Jacob quick let me have some of their red stew I'm famished that is why he's also called Edom which means red Jacob replied first sell me your birthright he said look I'm about to die what good is this birthright to me but Jacob said swear to me first so he swore an oath to him selling his birthright to Jacob then Jacob gave Esau some bread and some lentil stew he ate and drank and then he got up and left so Esau despised his birthright that's the first scene go now to Genesis 27 scene 1 introduces us to Isaac and Esau and Jacob we've already met Isaac and Rebekah were introduced to the twins Esau is the hairy red one and Jacob is the sort of mild-mannered one the one that was the favorite of the mother were introduced to them and part of that introduction that Moses gives us is that there was an instance in which Esau came in he was hungry he was vulnerable he was tired he was famished probably a little exaggerative I'm starving he said but Jacob who could have just given him a pot of stew or some bread he leveraged his advantage because he wanted to secure this thing that was rightfully the property of Esau the firstborn and that thing was the birth right now the birthright for those of us that have been studying through the book of Genesis is hugely significant because it was the thing that attached the family of Isaac to Abraham God had called Abraham and said your descendants will be as the stars of the heaven and as of the sand of the sea I'll give you land and I'll give you descendants to fill that land and Isaac knew as the firstborn of Abraham that his own firstborn in this case Esau would receive the promised birthright through which would come a double portion of his material wealth but also the the linkage to the lineage of Abraham that would bring Messiah Messiah the one that God had said to Abraham in you and through all the families of the earth will be blessed and yet Esau was not a religiously inclined person he wasn't somebody that that was particularly spiritually interested or invested and so it says here Moses wants us to know that when he sold his birthright for a mere morsel of food he despised his birthright because the birthright also came with birth responsibilities the birth responsibilities involved things like serving the God of Abraham being the priest of the home living not just for the here and now but also having an eye on the Hereafter and so Esau in that moment when he said what good is this birthright to me you could easily insert the single word now and you would have a real feel for Esau's basic personality I'm hungry I'm starving I'm famished what good is this birthright doing me right now and so he despised his birthright in an over perhaps an oversimplification of the character differences between Jacob and Esau these two nations that were struggling within the womb of Rebekah one had an eye to the hereafter and the other eyes only for the here and now and he saw he didn't care about the hereafter he didn't care about the spiritual blessings that attended the connection with Abraham he was hungry and that was it he was impulsive he was impetuous and he was impatient that's our first character sketch Genesis 27 this is a longer character sketch let's read it through beginning in verse 1 when Isaac was old and his eyes were so weak that he could no longer see he called for Esau his older son and he said to him my son Here I am II answered Isaac said I am now an old man and I don't know the day of my death now then go get your equipment your quiver your bow go out into the open country to hunt some wild game for me prepare me that kind of tasty food that I like and bring it to me to eat so that I may give you my blessing before I die now Rebekah was listening as Isaac spoke to his son Esau when Esau left for the open country to hunt the game to bring it Rebecca said of her son Jacob look I overheard your father say to your brother Esau bring me some game and prepare for me some tasty food to eat so that I may give you my blessing in the presence of the Lord before I die now my son listen carefully and do what I tell you go out to the flock and bring me to choice goat so that I can prepare some tasty food for your father just the way he likes it then take it to your father to eat so that he may give you his blessing before he dies Jacob said to Rebekah but mom my brother Esau is a hairy man and I have smooth skin what if my father touches me I would appear to be tricking him and that would bring down a curse on myself rather than the hope for blessing his mother said to him my son let the curse fall on me just do what I say go and get them for me so he went and got them and brought them to his mother and she prepared some tasty food just the way his father liked it then Rebekah took the best clothes of Esau her son which she had in the house and put them on her younger son Jacob she also covered his hands and as the smooth parts of his neck with goat skins then she handed to her son Jacob the tasty food and the bread that she had made he went to his father and said My father yes my son he answered who is it Jacob said to his father and these words would haunt him for the rest of his life I am Esau your firstborn I have done just as you told me please sit up and get some of my games so that you may give your blessing Isaac said to him how did you find it so quickly my son oh the Lord gave the Lord your God gave me success he replied then Isaac said to Jacob come near so that I can touch you my son to know whether or not you really are my son Esau or not Jacob went close to his father Isaac who touched him and said the voice is the voice of Jacob but the hands of the hands of Esau he did not recognize him for his hands were hairy like those of his brother Esau so he proceeded to bless him are you really my son Esau he asked I am he replied then he said my son bring me some of your game to eat so that I may give you the blessing Jacob brought it to him and he ate and he brought some wine and he drank and his father Isaac said to him come here my son and kiss me so he went to him and kissed him when Isaac caught the smell of his clothes he blessed him and he said ha the smell of my son is like the smell of a field that the Lord God has blessed may God and here comes the blessing may God give you heavens Dew and Earth's richness and abundance of grain and new wine may nations serve you and people's bow down to you be lord over your brothers and may the sons of your mother bow down to you may those who curse you be cursed and those who bless you be blessed the hoped-for promised patriarchal blessing given to an impostor verse 30 after Isaac finished blessing him and Jacob had scarcely left his father's presence his brother Esau came in from hunting he too had prepared some tasty food and he brought it to his father and he said to my my father please set up now and eat some of my games so that you may give me your blessing but his father asked him I said who are you I am your son Esau he answered your firstborn Isaac trembled violently and said who was it then that hunted game and brought it to me I ate it just before you came and I blessed him and indeed he will be blessed when Esau heard his father's words he burst out with a loud and bitter cry to his father and he said bless me to my father but he said your brother came in deceitfully and he took your blessing Esau said isn't he rightly named Jacob Yaakov in the Hebrew deceiver trickster cunning isn't he rightly called Yaakov this is the second time he has taken advantage of me he took my birthright and now he's taken my blessing then he asked haven't you reserved any blessing for me Isaac answered Esau I have made him lord over you and over all of his relatives and his servants I have sustained him with grain and new wine so what can I possibly do for you my son Esau said to his father do you have only one blessing my father blessed me too then he saw wept aloud his father Isaac answered him your dwelling will be away from the Earth's richness away from the dew of heaven above you will live by the sword and he will serve your brother but when you grow restless you will throw his yoke from off of your neck Esau held a grudge against Jacob because of the blessing of his father that had been given to him he said to himself the days of mourning for my father are near and I will kill my brother Jacob when Rebecca was told what her son Esau had said she sent for the younger son Jacob it said to him your brother Esau is planning to avenge himself by killing you now then my son do what I say flee at once to my brother Laban and her on stay with him for a while until your brother's fury subsides when your brother is no longer angry with you and he forgets what you did to him I'll send word for you to come back from here why should I lose both of you in one day then Rebekah said to Isaac I am disgusted with living because of these Hittite women these were the wives of Esau if Jacob takes a wife from among the women of this land from Hittite women like these my life may not be worth living it's hard to avoid the sense that the book of Genesis is going downhill rapidly right it's hard to avoid the sense that the wheels are coming off and that this is like some ancient biblical reality television right it has all of the markers of a modern reality television show there's scandal and there's intrigue and there's conflict and there's all these weird inter family inter social dynamics just like that statement that we read there as we began it's it's hard to imagine that this could be the family that God has especially and purposefully selected to carry his will and his glory and his character and his law to the earth it's a tough sell someone has commented that you read the book of Genesis it's like reading the story of a bunch of rednecks the stuff that happens there is downright grotesque in some instances and almost impossible to believe in others the last two weeks I've been reading not only Genesis 25 and 27 I've been reading in this book patriarchs and prophets a chapter titled Jacob and Esau I've read it over and over and over again to try and saturate my mind in a family profile or a sketch of the dynamics of this family and while we cannot know everything I believe that with the text that we've just read with this simple narrative and and what we also know a little bit about Isaac and Rebecca before this we can put together a a picture a portrait a case study of this family that I think you will find both encouraging and similar perhaps to your own but will also contain elements of warning let's start by doing brief character profiles of each of the four major protagonists we have Isaac Rebecca Esau and Jacob let's start with Isaac it's difficult to to pass or to miss the idea that Isaac is presented in Scripture as passive stubborn non-communicative and soft when you read the narrative that we've just read especially when you read it over and again this picture sort of emerges first of all he's somewhat passive he's passive in the sense that he has not led in a definitive and decided sense his family jumped down to the third one there he's non-communicative non-communicative because you already get the sense just in these two little passages of Scripture that there's not open transparent mutual conversation and communication between Isaac and Rebekah they each have their little Enclave and and we're given a little window into that in that verse that we looked at there in chapter 25 where it says that Isaac he loved Esau but Rebekah loved Jacob they each have their own little area of the family and and Isaac being non-communicative a bit passive and certainly stubborn will see that stubbornness here in a moment the stubbornness emerges because in fact his wife Rebekah had relayed to him hey an angel appeared to me remember when those twins were tussling in my womb yeah I remember that well an angel appeared to me the Lord appeared to me and said to me it doesn't say exactly an angel but the Lord said to me that the younger would rule over the older and that the older would serve the Eiger ah but this word of the Lord could hardly bother Isaac who had set his affections and his attentions on Esau he liked he saw he was drawn to Esau we're gonna see why in just a moment and so he was stubborn he refused to listen to his wife he refused to listen to the word of the Lord now here's an interesting thing in each of these sort of character profiles these negative character traits are actually quite close to positive character traits if they could just have been sanctified by God's Spirit passivity is quite close to humility or being humble stubbornness sometimes people that are principled can be perceived as stubborn because they refuse to compromise or to Bend being non-communicative could just mean as we say still waters run deep maybe he's just thoughtful maybe he's an introvert a melancholy and we could say someone's soft and that's a bit negative but if we say they're sensitive that's quite positive and so in each of these character traits as well as with us and this is the point why all of these stories about human beings and in real-life situations and real-life families why all these stories well it has to be so that at some level as we just read in that opening quotation there will read these stories and we will see not dissimilarity between us and the Bible characters but similarity cuz I hey that's a little bit like me both in their strengths and in their weaknesses both in their triumphs and in their victories we feel a connectivity even though we're separated by thousands of years we can say yeah I can relate to that in fact it's hard to avoid the sense here that the family of Isaac Rebecca Jacob and Esau is anything but a very modern family and you'll see that as the presentation continues I mentioned that I've been reading through this book patriarchs and prophets and I could read paragraph after paragraph after paragraph but I'll just give you two simple summary sentences I've done this for each of the characters to sort of solidify this character sketch listen to this Isaac she says was what's the word there unshaken another way of saying that would be stubborn Isaac was unshaken in his determination to bestow upon Esau the birthright even though his wife had relayed to him what the Lord had said he decided to perform the solemn ceremony what are those last two words there in secret there's the non-communication right Isaac has his little corner of the family he has his son Rebecca has her corner of the family they might have slept in separate bedrooms or even in separate beds they they had they lived different lives there was a non communication there and when it came down to this moment this should have been a happy mutual grand celebratory moment where Isaac who was the firstborn of Abraham the one with whom God had made that sacred covenant when the birthright and the blessing is passed on to his own firstborn this should have been celebratory this should have been mutual this should have been a social occasion a worship opportunity an opportunity to come before God to present themselves as a family but now that's not this family this is a family where there's conflict and there's conspiracy and there's intrigue and and Isaac being soft and demure he knows that if he says hey I'm gonna do the ceremony I'm gonna present he knows this is gonna cause conflict and like many men today and perhaps them in this room he doesn't want conflict and so he takes what he thinks is gonna be the easy way he'll just do it in secret but then there's that little verse that we read there but Rebekah heard even these little subtle indicators is that there's conspiracy in the home there's not open honest vulnerable transparent communication Isaac is plotting something in secret but Rebekah is listening in now how about the next one how about Rebekah what about Rebekah what about the character profile of Rebekah well this is what I came up with you could come up with your own she appears to be controlling manipulative untrusting and deceitful now I hope that you're seeing these descriptive words because they're not exactly the kinds of nice descriptive words that we think of when we think of the Bible characters let me just read you three simple phrases in Rebecca's vocabulary she's not presented as saying very much but check this out Genesis 27 Genesis 27 verse 8 when her son Jacob begins to protest the the the the suggested or the proffered deception of heard of his dad listen to what she says verse eight now my son listen carefully and do what I tell you look at verse 13 his mother said to him my son let the curse fall on me just do what I say and go get them for me jump down to verse 43 same chapter now then my son do what I say three times in Genesis 27 Moses presents Rebecca to us as saying just do what I say just do what I say just do what I say this woman is controlling now there's an interesting little another interesting little it's funny when you start actually reading the Bible not just you know you know reading over it carelessly but when you saturate your mind in the text and you read a chapter over and over and over and over again some really cool things start to come out all the way back in Genesis chapter 24 you don't have to turn there but I'll tell you a quick little story back in Genesis chapter 24 when Abraham had sent his servant Eliezer to go and find a wife for Rebekah or for Isaac excuse me that incidentally that gives you a little insight into the character of Isaac Isaac didn't go out looking for himself for a wife dad sent a servant that gives us a little insight to his passivity to his timidity I'll let Dad do it for me and when Eliezer arrives and sees Rebekah who comes out to water both him and the camels an interesting thing happens he goes back with Rebekah to her family and the servant says hey look I want to go right away I want to get out of here I want to my errand who's been successful praise the Lord God I want to take Rebekah immediately back to my family but the family of Rebekah protests and they said no no no no no we wanted to stay for a while we wanted to stick around for a little while now listen to this they then say hey look let her stay for 10 days and then they said let's call the young woman and ask her about it that gives you an insight that tells you who's running that family right there we'll ask her what she thinks so they called Rebekah and they said will you go with this man or will you stay with us and she said three words I will you see this picture that emerges of Rebecca you just do what I say you just do what I say you just do what I say but even here each of these is very close to a positive character aspect controlling you could say they're assertive manipulative you could say well she's perceptive untrusting maybe that's close to self-distrust 'fl and i really struggled with deceitful maybe creative you know we'll just put some skins on you and well I don't know now here's the sentence from patriarchs and prophets she was what's the word confidence now just get the picture let the picture sort of emerge in your mind Isaac is passive he's timid he's quiet and here we have a controlling woman do what I say do what I say do what I say I will go she's confident and because she's afraid to just confront and Isaac is trying to avoid by doing this in secret she resorts to stratagem this is a home where there's not open honest loving mutual communication it's not a transparent home it's a home where even the father and the mother the husband and the wife are battling for leverage over the children that couldn't describe your home yeah starting to feel really modern and really scarily similar she resorted to stratagem she would do for God what God said he would do God had said hey look the older will be in service to the younger and the younger will lord it over the older but she's gonna work out for God just as Sarah tried to do as well we'll talk about that in just a second so there's Rebekah how about Esau now this is an easy one Esau is impatient he wanted the stew and he wanted it now he's impulsive he's not thinking about the hereafter he only wants I want it I want it now he's self-indulgent and he's short-sighted but even these they're pretty close to some positive character traits impatient people or maybe he's just diligent impulsive well maybe he's just self-motivated self-indulgent I couldn't come up with anything shortsighted maybe he's just focused here's the patriarchs and prophets assessment of Esau Esau grew up loving self-gratification and centering all his interest in the present he was impatient of restraint are there any impatient people here any short-sighted people here any Esau is here let me ask you this question maybe this is an easier one do any parents here have Esau's for children don't like to be restrained and they want they know what they want they know how they want it and they want it now thank you very much yeah I see parents laughing you're laughing is telling the truth all right last one here Yaakov the Bible actually says that Yaakov Jacob was a mild man other translations say he was a peaceful man he was a quiet man but he's also a selfish man how do we know he's selfish because when his brother shows up and it's vulnerable looking hungry he says hey look I'll give you some stew you give me the birthright what a manipulator what a spineless manipulator this is the picture this is God's man whew I'm feeling pretty good about being God's man now how about you that's sure that's shoe fits I'll take that I'll take a little selfish a little spineless a little manipulative a little mild but mild is close to meek and spineless as close to compliant manipulative as close to perceptive and selfish there's nothing good there here it is summary paragraph of Jacob he constantly studied to devise some way to obtain the birthright in one short hour he made work for a lifelong repentance oh he was studying he saw he knew that he saw didn't care too much about the birthright he knew that he could secure it one day by artifice and stratagem and so he waited and he watched and he studied but he didn't study for godliness he studied to benefit himself selfishly neither Jacob nor Rebecca had the faith to just believe that God would do what God said he would do I got to say it again man the book of Genesis is going downhill rapidly this is not Abraham like faith and here we're exposed to a family that bears similarities to our own similarities that we need to wear on the that we need to wear on the chin we need a weed to embrace the fact that our families can be dysfunctional and broken and yet it should give us both encouragement and warning that if these can be God's people I have a message for you Church you can be God's people as well can the church say Amen you can be God's people too with all of your dysfunction with all of your brokenness now does God want to change that yes does he want to bring in love yes does he want to bring in trust yes does he want to bring in yuechu ality yes we're gonna see that emerge here this is how I see it you tell me if you agree this is a perfect storm this family this is a perfect storm because you got the one side notice here's here's Isaac's side and here's Rebekah side passive and soft Isaac was in no position and had no desire to check the strong impatient impulsive and adventurous character of his favorite son Esau perfect storm his favorite son manifests the character qualities that he himself doesn't have it reminds me of the old statement of Mark Twain when he was asked if he has a great author had fulfilled his ambitions in his life and he said my ambitions and dreams from my life have not been satisfied but my fathers have ah there's many a dad probably some in this very room who are living their lives vicariously through their sons and there's a healthy aspect to that there can be a good thing in that but there also can be when you're seeing your son doing things that you wish you could do or had done you can give them a freedom you can give them a liberty that you yourself know probably isn't best and Isaac knew that he saw was a wild adventuresome short-sighted an impatient man but he just liked him he liked the wildness of his life he liked it he would go out and hunt and get dirty and and he had character traits that Isaac himself didn't had and so he gave him too much elasticity too much freedom too much liberty it's a perfect storm then on the other side of the house Rebekah side of the house there's another perfect storm brewing mild quiet and peaceful Jacob was both manipulative but and this is often the case he was also manipulatable he could not resist his mother's favoritism she coddled him and he loved it he couldn't resist her control nobody in the house could or her insistence his preeminence over his brother she fostered an unhealthy and tragic sibling rivalry which made each brother suspicious of the other there is no climate here of love and trust and mutuality and transparency this is a very modern home and it's a perfect storm waiting to brew because Isaac who was timid timid timid timid he didn't want to have conflict with his controlling wife he waits till he gets right down to the end of his life and in secret he tries to do the very thing that was the very centerpiece of the whole book of Genesis to give the Covenant the birthright the blessing he tries to do it in secret and the whole thing backfires horrific Lee next week Josh Newbegin is gonna be preaching us a great sermon on Jacob I can't wait to hear it I've asked him if he's gonna wear shoes he says no here's the point we can take away ladies and gentlemen please read this and read it carefully when mothers try to be fathers and children try to be parents the home will suffer and may collapse newsflash men and women are different and women are better at many things than men in fact there are some things that women can do and I'm not just talking about physically reproductively there are things that women can do that men cannot do they struggle to do it they're not as emotive ly in tuned as we talked about last week a woman's very bodily structure with breasts and a uterus alerts us to the fact she was built for connection she was built for relationality when God put Eve into the garden he said help him you derive your sense of meaning and your sense of purpose and your sense of connectivity on this earth from relationships and he put Adam in the garden and he said do stuff and you get a bunch of men together and it's just a short amount of time before they say what do you do and how long have you done it how much do you get paid because it's doing you get a bunch of ladies together it's just a short amount of time before they say are you married how long have you married do you have children etc it's not a hard and fast rule but it's just a general awareness that men and women are different and when men are men and fathers are fathers and husbands are husbands then the family operates in the way it's supposed to when a woman is a woman and she's a mother and a wife then the family begins to operate in the way that God designed it but when the man ceases to be the man when the father ceases to be the father when he cannot stand up to his own children and he refuses to have conflict even healthy conflict with his wife the woman will and this happens a lot because there's a lot of absentee father's and there's a lot of fathers that even though they're in the home they're absentee father's I told you not to come this week if you didn't want to hear something I warned you last week so you got it I told you to go to the beach if you didn't want to hear it and you're here so you're getting it there's a lot of fathers who even though they're in the home they're not in the home and the mom slides into that position and it can work it is serviceable but it's not ideal and it can begin to cause tension in the home when the mother tries to be a father and the father is vacant God knows where he is or what he's doing he's emotionally absent he might be physically absent he in many cases sadly tragically is spiritually absent from the home and so here comes the mom trying to be all of these different things and it creates conflict it creates all kinds of problems in the home and I tell you if I've seen it once I've seen it a hundred times and then you have the other modern catastrophe but it's not a modern catastrophe you have children that haven't been reminded and who have somehow forgotten as children do particularly teenagers you're a child you are not the mom you are not the dead there is a reason that we allow children and make children get to a certain age before that we entrust them with dangerous responsibilities like cars and alcohol and voting and yet in many homes and I'm not speaking specifically about homes here I'm gonna let you decide if the shoe fits but in many homes the world over America Australia and beyond the children are in charge and you've seen it and I've seen it it's the fussy angry baby I want that candy no no no no yes okay yes right when mothers try to be fathers and children try to be parents the whole thing becomes unstable and it gets on the verge of collapse and the root here is the father it's the dad when fathers refused to be godly spirit-led leaders of their homes instability as the likely result that mothers are built for creativity they will very rarely abandon their family it does happen but rarely absentee mothers a much smaller problem than absentee father's because women are wired for connectivity and if the dads not there physically if the dads not there emotionally if the dad's not there spiritually the woman will try to fill those gaps it's the way it usually works but if a man will be a man and if a husband will be a husband and if a father will be a father and he will be not a lord not a king not a magistrate not an emperor but a man a godly humble Mutual trusting loving man a woman will find security in that she will find comfort in that she will find a place of happiness in the home begins to function in a really happy beautiful way it's not without cause that that right here in the heart of the book of Genesis look at this Genesis chapter 18 when were introduced to Abraham it's not without cause that we're told for I have chosen him God says of Abraham that he will direct his children and his household after him to keep the way of the Lord by doing what is right and just so that the Lord will bring about for Abraham what he's promised him part of the reason that God knew that Abraham was his man was not because he yet had a knowledge of the true God but because he knew what it was to be a man and he knew what it was to be a husband and he knew that's the kind of guy that'll be a good father I always says I know Abraham's my guy he will command his household and he will get his children to follow him he was a man's man I tell you we got these recurrent themes in the book of Genesis and for those of you that have been coming to our series we're seeing it again and again Moses is trying to make a point and I'll tell you one of the points that Moses makes and some of you aren't gonna like it I'm gonna tell you anyway because this is what the Bible says it's not what the pastor says so what the Bible says the book of Genesis were only 25 chapters in and we already have at least four stories of men being led around by the nose right Oh II do you want me to eat the fruit I'll eat that fruit right Adam was led to eat Adam was led by Eve to eat Abraham was led by Sarah to take Hagar lot was led by his wife to linger in Sodom and Jacob was led by Rebecca to deceive his father telling you guys this is what scripture is saying it's saying when men aren't men the women will be most women love their families too much to become absentee mothers and if they see that their father is disconnected emotionally spiritually physically if he's absent in one way or the other whether he's physically absent or just checked out come home on the internet come home in front of the television come home playing video games come home doing all the things that we do to unwind and hey look I get that I get the unwinding thing I get the checkout thing I get that but at the end of the day if you come home and that's the condition of your family I'm telling you mom will step up to the plate she'll do her best and she'll probably fail dad's got to be a dad a dad's got to be a husband he's got to be a he's got to be the hub listen to the word husband you know what the word means house band he's the one that wraps the band around the house he keeps it together he's the priest he's the hub he's the one he's not greater but he is integral he's in he's the cornerstone of the family if the husband falls apart stability is very unlikely the husband has to be the man here's the other thing I can't do it you're right you can't but Jesus can he said man I've tried that I've tried to be the priest of my home and I failed telling you that's what the Book of Genesis is about it's about a bunch of people who failed but God succeeded woo men you are not to Lord but to lead and there's a lion's difference between those two oh man I've met some men are like all my wife this and my wife that I tell you you look at the way that those wives are treated and I think well you're lucky that that's all you're getting let me say this you're not gonna like this I'm gonna tell it to you anyway I've been saying it for years i'ma keep saying it if a marriage falls apart or if a family is unstable in 90% of the cases my observation the majority of the fault rests on the husband I must say it again if a marriage falls apart or if a family becomes destabilized in 90% of the cases the vast majority of the cases wherever the dividing line is seventy thirty sixty forty fifty five forty five ninety ten eighty twenty whatever that dividing line is I'm telling you it's usually the husband's fault because women by nature long for security if a woman has her little nest and she has her place and she feels secure and she feels loved and she feels attractive and she has a man that loves her though all he'll come and they'll the water's beat against that home most women will stand by their men most not all but most and so when there is instability and when there is dysfunction when you begin to see that the man wants to look down his nose and start talking 50/50 I'm telling you it's not 5050 men I'm telling you I'm telling you it's not 50/50 you can create an environment now I'm not talking to everybody but I'm talking to most you can create an environment in which or why feels secure where she feels loved where she feels attractive and in most cases she will not only stick around she will be your Eve it'll be beautiful it'll be awesome I'm telling you so how do you know that I've been living it for sixteen years I would wish my marriage on anyone here I would wish my relationship on my wife with my wife on anyone in the world I would wish my marriage on you does that mean we're perfect no way we got our issues we got our problems but I'll tell you what when my dad decided to leave when I was 18 years old when he was 18 years old excuse me and I was three weeks old there was a cycle in my family it's a cycle that my own brother hasn't been able to avoid my brother's father abandoned him my own brother his father abandoned him when he was 8 we have the same mom and different dads and my brother and I we suffered under that what sometimes called the absent father wound we suffered under that God wound and later a man by the name of Richard a Shrike who was an officer and a gentleman he he married my mother and we were young we were only 12 years old and my name was David Cross and then later it was David Dorman II I've had three names Mel see you ladies Oh only had one or two I've had three David Cross David Dorman II and I made the choice I made the choice as did my brother to be adopted and to take on this name I bear this name with pride I bear this name with joy because this is the name of a man who was not my biological father but he has treed he has bound my family together in a way I used to think oh I hope my dad gets converted now I look at my dad and I think I hope I get converted and my brother went out and he did that thing that sometimes men do he became a sperm donor and there was a child and he repeated the cycle because he's no longer a part of his child's life the thing that he hated he became but through Jesus these family cycles can be broken and I made the decision when I when I married Violeta and when we had children I said Violeta by the grace of God we're gonna have a good family by the grace of God we're gonna love these children by the grace of God I'm not going to abandon them I want to be a great dad and I have my failures and I have my weaknesses but I'll tell you what I'm in that home and I'm sleeping with the right person and I love those boys and I'm gonna take care of them I'm not the perfect dad but I'm committed to my wife and I'm committed to Jesus how about you men I said how about you men you knew I was gonna preach today and I told you last week this is the home that Isaac built does this look like your home little communication favoritism distrust manipulation - see that's the home that Isaac built is that the home that you're building I want to close with this statement from every Christian home a holy light should shine forth every Christian home a holy light should shine forth love should be revealed in action we don't see a lot of love and Isaac Rebecca Jacob and Esau faint we don't a lot of it now we saw it early on James preached us that sermon that Isaac loved Rebecca but something must have happened the wheels came off the honeymoon was over and they started jockeying for position I visit homes not just in this community but I've been a pastor before I ever got here and I've been in lots of homes and I tell you when you get into a home where each member of the when the father and the mother are jockeying for position whether its financial or whether its influence or whether it's over the children or whatever it is when you start jockeying for position and there's intrigue and there's scandal and there's not open honest genuine vulnerable real communication it is an indicator that something is going wrong it should flow out love in all home interactions showing itself through right here thoughtful kindness is there kindness in your home not just occasionally not just episodically not just serendipitously or spontaneously but it's your home characterized by kindness and I want to say I've been in some homes in this church where I am thrilled with just the level of kindness and adaptability I could call out some names that I would embarrass them there are some beautiful beautiful families in this church and I've got been in all of your homes but I've been to a lot of them and I tell you there's a lot to be encouraged about but every one of us knows that there's the family that everyone sees and then there's the family that we own that only us see and God let's let's be those people that when people are around and when they're not around that a holy influence will flow out of our family not yelling and screaming especially not in front of the children showing itself in thoughtful kindness in gentle unselfish courtesy there are homes where this principle is carried out and there's homes in the kingscliff Church where this principle is carried out can somebody say Amen it's true where God is worshipped I tell you the importance of gathering your family in the morning or in the evening or both and just having a short prayer you don't have to read five chapters out of desire of Ages just come together as a family read a paragraph read a verse pray you can have family worship in 60 seconds don't tell me don't have time for family worship you can have family worship in 60 seconds I know I've done it and an amazing thing will happen 60 seconds will turn into 120 seconds 120 seconds will turn in 240 seconds before you know it you'll be having a nice little pleasant family time don't make it a burden don't make it something that the kids hate and that you know no no no just short just start worshiping God is your family a family that every morning or every evening or both and if you don't have children what about just you and your wife do you gather together in the morning hold hands and pray do you do it I hope you do the old saying is true the family that prays together stays together but you know me I'm an active person I like to add this one the family that plays together stays together you where God is worshipped in truest love reigns yes Lord give us these homes give us these homes from these homes morning and evening prayer ascends to God morning and evening prayer as sweet incense and His mercies and blessings descend upon the family like morning dew a well-ordered Christian household is a powerful argument watch this this is the climax this is the end this is the big punchline get ready a well-ordered Christian household is a powerful argument in favor of the reality of the Christian religion all can see that there is an influence and a work and the family that affects the children all can see that the God of Abraham is with that family the God of Abraham is with them o friends is the God of Abraham with your family the answer is yes he is you've got a connect card in your hand I want you to fill it out you say all this connect card again I haven't done it for weeks stop complaining take it out if you need one you can raise your hand I got some at the back I think take this out my goal was to preach and under an hour I've been going for 56 minutes so I need you to help me out here number one I believe that God loves and uses broken feet by the way on the other side you fill out your name and all the important details so please do that particularly if you're a visitor or a an irregular attendee I want everybody to fill it out but sometimes the members can be a little - a little - member ish all right let's look at it whether you're a member or visitor I'm asking me to fill this out I believe God loves and uses broken people and families do you believe that I said Church do you believe that I'm not sure I believe that you believe that do you believe that God loves and uses broken families if you read the book of Genesis you'd have to be convinced of that so check that if you believe that number two God please make me a mother or a father after your heart of love and holiness that's a big one don't check it if you don't mean it it'll be better to leave it unchecked and be honest than to check it and not be honest man do you want love and holiness to reign in your home I want it to reign in my home God make me a mother make me a father make me uh maybe you're a single parent here today my heart goes out to you my mom was a single parent till I was almost a teenager I get that that's not an easy that's not easy I heart goes out to you number three God it is my desire to honor you and my family and in my home not just my desire what about it's my plan I should have put that in I said God it is my plan it is my desire it is my desire to honor you and my family my home I wish I'm not sure it's happening but I could wish the teenagers are filling this out and saying you know what I'm gonna fill this out I want to honor God in my family at home I'm looking at you teenagers fill it out it's not just up to your parents you got brains to some of you number four now you can fill this in as for me in my house you ride it in there if that's your experience if that's your decision if that's what you want you can ride it in we will serve the Lord as for me in my house Joshua 24:15 we will serve the Lord as for me in my house by the grace of God by the strength of Jesus saturated in his love bathed in his forgiveness looking to him I want to be a dad I want to be a husband I want to be a mom I want to be a wife I want to be a son I want to be a daughter yes in my capacity in my sphere as for me in my house we will serve the Lord if that's your desire fill it in thank you guys Thank You Jesse Thank You Bailey all right at the bottom there it says I would like to receive Bible studies if you'd like some Bible studies that'd be great love to give those be baptized Nick just baptized this morning or last night I would like to receive a pastoral visit write it down Jared myself one of the elders we'd love to come visit you thanks mark fill out the card I'm gonna close with prayer I'm gonna close with prayer and I'm gonna pray for revival and I hope you'll do the same I hope you'll join me in praying that our church will be revived but not just our church I'm praying that our families will be revived can somebody say amen to that man I tell you I know the story of this church I know more than you might think and I know that a few years ago there were some people in this church that just started reading their Bible for an hour a day and then they passed that on and others and others and others in a revival came to this church am I telling the truth telling the truth aren't I what if God not only wrought revived us as individuals but what if God started reviving us as families and there was a connectivity some of your teenagers are in trouble I want to tell you that all right some of your teenagers aren't in this room and you know that and just because our children are in this building doesn't mean they're in Jesus I pray that your family and my family will become godly families that we will become the house that Jesus built and this will become the church that Jesus built can you say Amen father in heaven we see the book of Genesis father and we are looking in the mirror here many of us are looking right in the mirror I want to pray for the dads and the husbands I want to pray for the future dads and the future husbands father make them men but not men in the worldly sense not men and how many women can you sleep with sins father make them women in the godly sense the leadership sense not just the sperm-donor sins but father make them men that it could be said of them that that husbands love your wives just like Jesus loved the church father give us these kinds of men give us these kinds of fathers I I believe we have a church that's got lots of them but father may there not be one among us I pray for every man here make us great husbands fathers and for those that are not yet husbands and fathers make us great sons father where we have failed and where we have gone lazy and lacks 'days achill and we've been busy and we spend more time on the internet than wrestling with our children forgive us for them father revive the men the husband's the fathers and the sons father for the ladies where would we be without godly mothers we wouldn't be at all because every one of us has a mother not all of us had dad's father I'm so thankful for a mother who when the family was falling apart she refused to I pray father you would give us mothers here Lord I want to pray a very specific prayer that you will multiply the sleep of the mothers here I know there's a lot of moms are gonna say amen to that especially with the young children multiply their sleep father I pray that you would give us a search full of godly mothers and wives not controlling but neither being controlled a mutual connection between a husband and a wife a love a trust of vulnerability a transparency a godliness father do that for our women make some great moms they already are we had Mother's Day last week father we learned that there's just no amount of good no amount of power on the earth to come here compares to the power of a mom strengthen our mothers and for our children father this is a big one having two boys myself I'm terrified of the world in which we live and frankly if you're not terrified you're not paying attention this world is awash in scepticism awash in hostility awash in sensuality it's the most sexualized culture the most perverse culture that's ever lived and father I pray that you would shield our children and where they're not shielded or they're unwilling to be shielded father wake them up and revive them to the hostility of the world in which they live a world that is hostile to you hostile to Christ hostile to the spirit hostile to the church save our children father I claim the promise of Isaiah 49 25 I will contend with him that contends with you saith the Lord and I will save your children save the mothers and fathers save the children save our church not just eternally but day to day father you've been with us today most of us I pray all of us have said with Joshua thousands of years ago as for me and my house say it with me we will serve the Lord in Jesus name let everyone say Amen

Channel: Kingscliff Church

Views: 18,215

Rating: 4.8830409 out of 5

Keywords: Kingscliff SDA Church

Id: oVgtQEa5odE

Length: 59min 37sec (3577 seconds)

Published: Sat May 16 2015