- Ooh boy, some people never quite fail to surprise with their stupidity. There have been a lot of
stupid people in history that tried to pull of crimes
seemingly without a brain, some people that either
just had no game plan or tried robbing the wrong person. So today, we're going to be looking at history's finest examples
of moronic criminals who tried to commit a felony
but failed spectacularly, so let's get right into it. These are the ten dumbest
criminals in the world. Number one is Ruben Zarate. On March 24th, 2008,
18-year-old Ruben Zarate walked into Velasquez Mufflers
for Less in Chicago, Illinois at about 8:00 in the
morning wearing a mask and waving around a revolver
while he was demanding money. The employees working
there at the time explained that they had very little money
and that they couldn't open the safe due to the fact that
nobody knew the combination outside of the owner of the shop. Now, seeing as how the owner
wasn't going to be there until much later that day, it seemed unfortunately
that he was out of luck. Ah, however, determined
to get his quick payday, the young man wrote down two phone numbers that he could be reached at and gave them to the
man at the front desk, demanding that they call him the moment that the owner returned. Of course instead the
employees called the police and officers came to the
shop in plain clothes, telling employees to call the man back. Once Zarate returned and pulled
a gun out of his sweatshirt, police shot first and
wounded him in the leg. He was charged the very next
day with attempted robbery and aggravated assault
of a police officer. Oh man, the safe is locked? Okay, well, here's my number, my social insurance
number, and my address. Call me later, okay. Number two is Derrick Mosley. You know what they say. Don't bring a knife to a gun fight, or at least bring more than a bat. On July 25th, 2013,
22-year-old Derrick Mosley walked into a gun shop
called Discount Gun Sales located in Beaverton,
Oregon with nothing else but a baseball bat in his hand. Yeah, a gun shop. He smashed one of the glass display cases in order to steal a gun, but somehow never stopped to
think that the shop's owner, clearly a gun enthusiast, might
actually have a gun on him. Sure enough, the store manager
pulled out his firearm, pointed it at Mosley, and demanded for him to get down on the ground. Other than pooping his pants, Mosley dropped the unloaded gun and knife and followed the instructions
without incident. When police arrived, they
found Mosley on the floor and arrested him immediately,
charging him with first degree robbery, first degree theft, second degree criminal
mischief, and naturally, unlawful possession of a firearm. You a stupid son of a bitch. Number three is Joey
Miller and Matthew McNelly. On October 23rd of 2009, before attempting to rob
a home in Carol, Iowa, 23-year-old Matthew McNelly
and 20-year-old Joey Miller decided instead of hiding their identities the traditional way, you know,
using masks or pantyhose, they would use permanent black marker. So, they got a couple of Sharpies and scribbled all over their
faces to disguise themselves. Oh man, brilliant. Nobody should have been able
to recognize them, right? Well, the thing is, the
problem with permanent marker, it's, you know, permanent. After a call came in about
the attempted burglary and suspects escaping in a vehicle, police managed to stop a
car fitting the description and they were absolutely
shocked by what they saw. There were Miller and McNelly, still with marker on their faces. Appropriately nicknamed Dumb and Dumber, the two were charged
with attempted burglary and since the two were allegedly
intoxicated at the time, McNelly was also charged with
driving under the influence. Number four is Krystian Bala. After his body was found in
a stream in Wroclaw, Poland in 2000, local small business owner, Dariusz Janiszewski's
murder went unsolved. That was, until 2003 when
police came across Amok, a book written by Polish
author, Krystian Bala. In the book, the character was murdered in the same way that the man was, described using information that only the true killer would be aware of, as investigators never
released it to the media. After further investigation, police found numerous other similarities between Bala and the book's
main antagonist, Chris. As it turns out, Bala was the murderer and the book was a
chronicling of what he did. He was arrested in 2007
and was sentenced to 25 years in prison for the
planning and committing of the murder of Dariusz
Janiszewski, but interestingly, his book sales ended up exploding
because of his conviction. Yeah, I guess that's
one way to sell a book. Number five is Darren Kimpton. If you've got over 36 convictions for breaking and entering and burglary, odds are pretty good that
you're probably terrible at it. Specifically, the getting away part. Someone should have told
49-year-old Darren Kimpton that a long time ago, before
he decided to break into the same house twice in one night. While trying to break into
a Northampton England home on December 22nd, 2012,
Kimpton cut himself, leaving some blood on the door lock. Wanting nothing more than
to steal items to sell in order to buy Christmas
presents for his parents, he went to try breaking
into the same house again. What he failed to notice, however, was that police were
already on the property, as the homeowner had already
obviously called the police. After putting his hand through
the already broken window and trying to let himself in,
the police watched him enter. Look at this stupid fool. You got this on camera? Yeah, I got the billy bat. We taking this fool down. Following a brief struggle,
Kimpton was caught and tests later confirmed
that the blood on the house's lock was indeed his. Well, I really hope Darren's parents enjoy their soap and cigarette Christmas gift. Number six is Quinton J. Thomas. On December 27th, 2005,
20-year-old Stephen Kelley of Maryland was shot in the
back of the head and killed during a robbery gone wrong. Shortly after, 22-year-old
Quinton J. Thomas was arrested and charged with the murder. While awaiting his trial,
Thomas sent out some letters to his friends on the outside. Now, what you need to
understand is that at the Montgomery County jail,
only incoming mail was checked, mostly for contraband. Outgoing mail was not. Knowing this, Thomas was
confident that by writing down instructions to stop certain
people from testifying would be received without
anybody intercepting it. Man, Quinton, you's a super genius. You brilliant. You know, except for the
fact that when you put incriminating orders in
writing and then misspell the address on the envelope,
oh, that's not good. The letter arrived back to the prison marked return to sender, and of course, as incoming mail to the prison, it was opened by guards
and Thomas was busted. It was added to the prosecutor's evidence and Thomas was later sentenced
to life without parole. Number seven is Frank Singleton. In March of 2008,
21-year-old Frank Singleton was released from a Florida County jail after serving time for a
misdemeanor trespassing charge. Realizing that his
journey home would require nearly a 6.2 mile long hike,
he decided to take a shortcut by carjacking someone and
driving their car home. That someone was 23-year-old
Justine Lapierre, who cooperated with the
ex-con when handing over the keys when he demanded them. Yeah, see, the problem is
though, sadly for Singleton, he didn't get very far
because as it turns out, the car that he'd stolen
was a 2006 Nissan 350Z, a car that had a manual transmission. Since he didn't know how to drive stick, Singleton was unable
to operate the vehicle and was immediately arrested. Now, you might be asking yourself, "But Matt, how did he
get so caught so quick? Why didn't he just run away?" Well, it turns out that
the car that he stole was parked in the jail
visitor's parking lot. Yeah, that's right, he walked
out of jail a free man, got lazy, and tried carjacking a car right out of a police parking lot. He literally wound up
right back in his cell, now charged with carjacking, and all because he
didn't feel like walking. (coughing) You lazy,
(coughing) You stupid. Got a bit of a cough. Number eight is James Allan. As any experienced
shoplifter will tell you, it's never a good idea to
hit the same place twice, but that clearly was never
advice heard by this guy. After successfully robbing a corner store on February 23rd, 2012, 28-year-old James Allan
returned to rob the same shop on March 2nd, only ten days later. The second time however things
didn't exactly go as planned. After waving a plastic gun and grabbing some cash from the till, Allan tried to run off,
pushing the pull door, obviously without success. He kicked at the door violently, wanting to kick out the glass panels, but instead fell backwards
into a drink display. Frustrated, he removed the
balaclava he was wearing right in front of the security cameras and demanded that the manager,
Amanda Crock, let him out. As if that wasn't bad enough,
just three hours later, the police found him still on
the same street as the shop with his balaclava stuffed in his pocket. Open the door man, I want to get out! You can get out, it says pull. Ain't no time to listen!
Fix it! Number nine is Dennis Hawkins. In July of 2010,
48-year-old Dennis Hawkins decided to rob a bank in
Swissvale, Pennsylvania. He decided to wear the
ultimate identity concealing disguise, a blonde wig, fake
breasts, and clown pants. (laughing, imitating Krusty the Clown) Using a toy BB gun that he shoplifted that morning from a local K-Mart, Hawkins made off with an
undisclosed amount of cash, fleeing as best he could
in a ridiculous outfit. The disguise might have worked for him had it not been for the
mustache and goatee, which he decided not to shave off, which showed up clearly in
the surveillance footage. After police sent out a
description of Hawkins, a gas station attendant reported someone fitting that unique description attempting to steal a car
from their parking lot. When police arrived, it was obvious that they had found their clown man. Despite not wearing the wig anymore, he still had on the fake breasts
and was covered in red dye, a result from the exploding packet in the bag of money that he stole. Got away with it! Oh man, red dye everywhere. I'm keeping these breasts on. And number ten is Christopher Kron. Okay, there's incompetence, and then there's asking to be arrested and this guy was definitely the latter. In August of 2008, ADT,
a security company, received an alarm
notification from a restaurant called Junkanoo Bar in
Fort Myers Beach, Florida. Following protocol, the
agent called the business in the event that the
alarm was accidental, but to her surprise, 47-year-old Christopher
Kron answered the phone. Kron had just broken into the restaurant and didn't seem to mind
that the phone call had interrupted his robbery, even giving the representative
his actual full name. Hi, how are you? Yes, I'm lonely. Yes, I broke into a store. My name's Christopher Kron, and I'm going to jail, okay. When he couldn't give
the correct password, the agent notified the police, but Kron escaped with
two bottles of alcohol. Oh, big score! Incredibly, the next morning, he went back to that
restaurant that he had robbed to have a drink and was
immediately recognized by an employee who had seen
the surveillance video. The police arrived. Kron was immediately arrested. What an idiot. So those were the ten dumbest
criminals in the world, possibly in history. But as always, I want to know from you, have you heard of a
story of a dumb criminal who has done something so dumb that they deserve to be on this list? Leave your response below, because I'll be reading through them and I'll pin the best comment to the top. Thank you guys so much
for coming by today. If you enjoyed this, make
sure to hit that like button and don't forget to
come back here tomorrow at 3PM eastern standard time, because I'll have a
brand new video for you. I will see you then. Bye!
