Why Trauma Beliefs Are So Hard to Change

Unlimited CEUs $59 on Trauma Informed Care at AllCEUs.com hey there everybody and welcome back to  this video today we're talking about why  trauma beliefs are so hard to change I'm your  host Dr Donnelly Snipes remember trauma is a   situation that causes you to feel unsafe and  Powerless that's the core feature of trauma   trauma beliefs are those beliefs that are formed  as a result of that experience to help you predict   and prevent future unsafe situations so if you are  driving along and it's pouring down rain and you   get into an accident then you may form the trauma  belief that it is unsafe to drive in the rain   okay well to a certain extent that's kind of  true but a lot of it is a matter of degrees   but it's important to recognize you formed that  belief based on your experience and now you hold   it and your brain says you don't want to get  into another accident because it could be worse   next time so your brain's actually trying  to protect you by holding on to that belief when we have a trauma experience it is  emotionally powerful and so what we call   emotional salience or the power of the emotion  um makes it more or less difficult to get rid   of things that don't have a lot of emotional  power to them they're easy to forget things   that have a lot of emotional power on the other  hand tend to stick around so think of Boulders   versus Pebbles you can sweep Pebbles out of  the way or move step over them or something   and you don't even notice but a boulder you know  that's kind of in your way and it's harder to move   unresolved anger is also a reason that we may  have difficulty getting rid of trauma beliefs   or changing trauma beliefs because anger remember  is a response to a threat and Trauma was a threat   it left us feeling unsafe and Powerless so we  may have some anger that is unresolved and we're   Afraid on a subconscious level if we let go of  those beliefs we may be vulnerable now anger has a   lot of buddies anger is a kind of a umbrella term  guilt is anger at yourself you may have difficulty   letting go of certain trauma beliefs because they  are you're angry at yourself for what happened and   right now for whatever reason you're afraid  to let that go you're afraid to let go of   that guilt because and I don't know what follows  your because but if you're afraid that if you let   go of that guilt fill in the blank it can revolve  around shame and shame and guilt are very closely   connected shame is anger at yourself but shame has  to do more with who you are not what you did guilt   is about something you did shame is feeling bad as  a person and sometimes we have difficulty letting   go of trauma beliefs because we believe that we  deserved it for some reason that shame tells us   you're not a good person so you deserve that  bad thing to happen to you and it's going to be   important to process that and develop a different  understanding of yourself as a human being as a   lovable human being and grief now grief has a lot  of emotions denial anger bargaining depression   and acceptance but anger is a part of grief and  when we experience a trauma sometimes it creates   a whole Cascade of losses in our life and until  we address those losses until we feel safe and   empowered in each one of those areas our brain is  going to hold on to that memory and go yeah but   what about this over here I need to  keep you safe so that doesn't happen   cognitive accommodation to create a sense of  control or safety accommodation is a concept   that Piaget put forth and basically it means  changing your understanding of the world to   fit the data and when you experience a trauma  that doesn't compute you're thinking to yourself   this isn't supposed to happen to me this wasn't  supposed to happen to me or I don't understand why   this is happening to me so the experience does  not fit with your current understanding of the   world therefore you change your understanding  of the world to fit the experience and that's   your brain's way of kind of bringing that memory  in and saying come on in join the join the club   unfortunately since that memory is  so strong it tends to be a bully and   downplay some of the non-threatening  memories and experiences   changing or letting go of these trauma beliefs  may threaten your perceived safety and stability   so if you tend to over generalize it is never  safe to drive in the rain for example or every   time there's a thunderstorm there's going to  be or tornado that's over generalization and   you may have had multiple experiences where  driving in the rain or during a thunderstorm   bad things happened so part of you started to say  well it seems like every time x happens y happens   but that's not actually accurate that's based  on some cognitive biases that we'll talk about   and all or nothing thinking I'm either all good or  all bad it's important to acknowledge that not all   similar situations will be dangerous thinking of  exceptions what are times that you were driving in   the rain or riding with somebody who was driving  in the rain that there was not a car accident what   are exceptions to the thunderstorm rule you know  how many times have you been through thunderstorms   that nothing bad happened and it's important to  really start recognizing the facts the traumatic   events are going to seem a lot more frequent  because they're bigger and in your mind they're   bigger they're that Bolder but it's also important  to recognize the times when it hasn't happened to   get some balance so consider in every situation  when you're starting to have those trauma beliefs   triggered consider the facts in context in this  context at this time does this trauma belief apply cognitive biases I already brought those up  a little bit the confirmation bias hinders   your ability to consider alternate perspectives  confirmation bias means I am going to look for   information that confirms my belief I am going  to during a thunderstorm during a rain while   we're driving I'm going to look for people that  got into wrecks and that will confirm my belief   or during a thunderstorm I'm going to get on line  and I'm going to look to see where the tornadoes   are I'm going to confirm my beliefs and when  we do that we tend to do that to the exclusion   of contradictory information we  tend to do that to the exclusion of   um data that would tell us hey you're safe and  that confirmation bias also goes along with what   I was talking about on the last slide that we tend  to remember the traumatic events and not remember   the non-traumatic events so when I'm thinking  about thunderstorms the thoughts that come to my   mind are of all of the times there was something  bad that happened not of all the times that there   wasn't and that that's that cognitive bias  my brain is confirming my expectation that   it's going to be bad instead of looking at all  of the data and really getting a big picture   we can also experience the confirmation bias by  mind reading when we mind read we think that we   know what somebody's thinking so we can confirm  that they're angry with us by look the look   on their face I just knew you were angry with  me because I saw that look on your face we're   looking for something to confirm our expectations  someone's going to be mad at us or somebody's   going to be unsafe jumping to conclusions same  sort of thing if you're anxious worried that   your significant other is cheating on you you're  probably going to look for information to support   that maybe they are being withdrawn maybe they are  late coming home from work maybe you know there's   a lot of maybes but each one of those things has  a variety of different possible explanations but   when you're using the confirmation bias the  only explanation you're willing to accept is   they're cheating on me and personalization is  another confirmation bias where that happened   because I'm a bad person that happened because  of me and looking at and and a lot of times   you do have a part in things if you're driving  in the rain and you get into a wreck well yeah   you played a part in it you were driving but it  wasn't necessarily your fault and it doesn't mean   necessarily that every time you drive in the  rain you're going to get into a car accident   the availability heuristic is the boulder Pebble  I was talking about earlier a lot of people for   example think that flying is dangerous because  when we hear about airplanes and flights on the   television on the news we're only hearing about  the crashes we're not hearing about the 20 30   000 flights a day that go off without a hitch  so the information about safe flights we don't   have it the only information we have available  to us is about the things that were newsworthy   and the hindsight bias can also cause us to want  to hold on to some of those trauma memories and   that's very self-explanatory when you look  back and you go I should have known or I   shouldn't have done that and then that should  start to inform or that shouldn't starts to   inform what you do in the future so I shouldn't  have driven in the rain therefore in the future   I must not ever drive in the rain  and you're holding on to that   belief that you formed now there is a kernel of  Truth sometimes in trauma beliefs not always but   sometimes and it's important to recognize that  trauma beliefs tend to be extreme and use those   All or Nothing words or have extreme consequences  to them so I'm not saying that you're necessarily   going to get rid of those trauma beliefs but  reframing them can be helpful for example   if I drove in the rain and I got into an  accident that was traumatic that was scary   therefore yes it is more dangerous to drive  in the rain than it is when it's not raining   and there are steps I can take in order  to keep myself safer so I'm learning   from that experience that yeah okay maybe I  didn't give enough credit to slippery roads   however I'm not saying that when it rains it is  never safe to drive and I can never go out when   it's raining so it's taking it and putting  a practical perspective on it if you will relationships can also cause us to have difficulty  letting go of trauma bonds or trauma beliefs I'm   sorry identity and self-concept may be altered  by trauma and changing these beliefs may feel   inauthentic or scary so if somebody says I am  a survivor I am safe now then there's a little   voice inside them that may say well if I'm able  to keep myself safe now what does that mean about   the past did I bring that on myself somehow and  so it's important to kind of Silence that critic   and consider things in context when you were four  you had much different skills than when you're 24.   and in certain situations that are traumatic  what you're doing now is fine and what you   did back then didn't cause the trauma you  just happened to unfortunately experience it   if I'm worthwhile why did they do this to me  why did they abuse me why did they abandon me   why did they whatever um that can people who  have experienced trauma especially abandonment   rejection abuse May really start to  think of themselves as unlovable and   if they let go of that then they it totally  shakes everything up because this person that   did whatever it was to them they've got to try  to start understanding well how could you do   that to a good person you know the only way your  behavior makes sense is if I was a bad person   and if I'm not broken as a result of  my trauma why do people keep rejecting   me this is another one of those that people  sometimes have a hard time letting go of because   in their present they are still adopting that  victim stance they're seeing themselves as   broken and they're assuming that other people are  rejecting them because of their Brokenness because   of whatever the trauma did to them instead of it  might just be you're not a good match or it could   be that because you feel powerless because you  feel hopeless and helpless you may be engaging   in for example what we call codependent behaviors  and that can be off-putting to other people but   it's not because you're a bad person you  want to focus on the behaviors not the person additionally people who've experienced trauma  May surround themselves with people who share   similar beliefs which can create an echo chamber  I'm all for support groups don't get me wrong   but being around people that share your belief of  unsafeness um and whose support and reinforce that   belief that you are unsafe that you are powerless  that there's no hope can be really exhausting and   the more that behavior is reinfo that belief  is reinforced the bigger that Boulder grows   and because of your trauma beliefs you may avoid  situations that challenge those beliefs and can   prevent what some called traumatic growth going  back to driving in the rain again you experienced   a an accident when you were driving in the rain it  was traumatic it was terrifying you've recovered   and until you're able to go out and at least ride  with somebody who's driving in the rain again   it's going to be difficult to  start changing that belief and restructuring it to be less extreme trauma-related beliefs will be harder to change  if you're not feeling safe and empowered and so   if you find that those trauma-related beliefs are  sticky it's important to step back and go how is   this Behavior still somehow protecting me and is  it accurate given the facts in the current context   have compassion for yourself when beliefs do  not change quickly recognizing their purpose   you can move a pebble out of the way really fast  but moving that Boulder you're only going to   move it you know a centimeter at a time maybe  but recognizing every little bit of progress   when you notice you're having trauma-related  beliefs evaluate them based on the facts in   the current context to decide their  accuracy and consider keeping a log   of your trauma-related beliefs to evaluate if  they're decreasing in frequency or intensity   so those beliefs that you have that you recognize  are related to trauma whether it's about   abandonment or rejection or whatever it is keep a  log of how frequently you have beliefs about that   and obviously each time you have that belief you  want to try to evaluate it restructure it and then   eventually hopefully you stop having those beliefs  so often or when you do have them they're not as   sticky you're like no that's not accurate  in this context and it goes away hopefully   that has given you a few tools to understand  trauma-related beliefs and start coping with them

Channel: Doc Snipes

Views: 14,457

Keywords: Cheap CEUs, Dawn Elise Snipes, LADC CEU, MAC CEU, addiction ceus, all ceus, allceus, cbt, ce broker, ce4less, certificate programs, codependency, cognitive behavioral therapy, counseling, counseling skills, counseling techniques, counselling, counselor certification, counselor education, crcc, doc snipes, donnelly snipes, estrangement, hpcsa, lcdc ceus, lcsw ceus, lmft ceus, lmhc ceus, nce, ptsd, self help, trauma, trauma beliefs, unlimited ceus, yt:cc=on

Id: xAtGngEpvQY

Length: 19min 6sec (1146 seconds)

Published: Thu Aug 03 2023