Why Is It So Hard To Sit Down And Read? - Fear of Solitude

so I want to start off today's video with a very simple thought experiment which is going to illustrate everything that there is to talk about in this video so the thought experiment goes like this imagine if you will you pick up a random person not pick up in a way that you're you're gonna date the person but you pick a random person that you know let it be a boyfriend let it be a girlfriend let it be an acquaintance let it be a parent let it be whomever you pick up a random person and you ask him do you want to learn about something cool about the universe or do you want to learn about you know there's a cool thing there out there called quantum mechanics do you want to learn about quantum mechanics I mean quantum mechanics is a very bad example because not everybody is interested in quantum mechanics but let's take for example do you want to learn about evolution for example if your biology nerd do you want to learn about evolution and you and you talk to that person they're like yeah evolution is really cool I'd like to search research more deeply into that topic right according to different interests different people have different interests but if you just take an average person on some level they do have that curiosity within them they do have that desire so to speak to know it's not like people just don't care about knowledge at all do you want to know stuff that's why science YouTube channels was so popular people want to know stuff okay let's continue with a thought experiment and you okay you talk to that guy he's like yeah I want to know about the universe and then you hand him a book about whatever subject that they're interested in let it be biology led to be evolution either be quantum mechanics okay here's a book that you can read that teaches you everything that you need to know about the subject now here's the book and then at first class that guy or that girl is gonna be like hell yeah I'm gonna read this book I want to understand this topic I want to understand the entire implication of the topic but guess what they take that book they go back home a week later you call them back or you meet him again in person and ask him wait how did you go with that book you know the book that I gave you last week how much have you read tell me about tell me about it you're very excited because you've read that book and you think it's a really great book and you recommended this to that person but guess what they stare you with a blank look or they stare at you with like this confused look and at the end they have to admit that they've only read about 5 to 10 pages they've only read about 5 to 10 pages and they come up with some rationalizations such as you know I just didn't have time to read I don't want to read it or have too much crap going on I have so much stuff going on so you see it is not that people don't want to learn is it is only because there's a thing that stands in their way between themselves and learning there's a thing that stands between themselves and learning it's not that everyone just don't give a jack about the universe if you pick a random person if he's curious he wants to know about this stuff but it is this obstacle that we're gonna devote the rest of this episode to that's really gonna illustrate though that really the difficulty that's involved when we embark on this journey of self education so here's my claim the reason why people don't self educate isn't because they're dumb nor is it because they don't just they don't care about the universe at all the reason why people don't self educate is because they fear solitude and quietude because they fear solitude and quietude so let's bring back the previous thought experiment for example the previous thought experiment goes something like this the girl or the guy took that book from you and initially they seem as though they're very happy about they're very excited to learn this piece of knowledge okay then they took the book home they read it they were at about 10 pages and then guess what there's a fear that grips them there's a fundamental existential fear that grips them that comes in terms with them that basically so just basically clamp them down at the end they have to give in to this fear because they're not used to this state of quietude and solitude they're not used to just sitting in a room by themselves they're not used to being quiet all there are that they're used to is distractions okay let's talk about distraction for a minute to really link together with this concept of solitude and quietude second thought experiment you're sitting in a room and there's a giant ICI humming or air conditioner humming in the background just like really loud really loud air conditioning and you're sitting at a desk you're reading a book okay that air conditioning is humming okay that's that's kind of cool it's kind of noisy but your brain has adapted itself to the environment if the noise sort if a noise source is constant your brain does a really good job of adapting itself to that noise source we're at the end you don't even realize that the humming AC is there you don't even realize that there's this huge humming noise coming out of somewhere you're just sitting there you're just on your phone you're just doing your stuff without realizing that AC humming noise is there however if the easy now it gets turned off all of a sudden you've realized that holy God there's a humming thing in the background all along okay I didn't realize that before but okay whatever I guess that's done then you adapt to the quiet frame of mind so this distraction that we've been talking about all along here this distraction really is analogous to that humming machine really is analogous to that humming air conditioner you don't realize that it's there you don't realize this piece of distraction is there and the distractions substitute your own example you're a distraction to watch TV to play video games to have something humming in the background to have like a video playing YouTube video playing in the background as you're doing our homework even though you you know for sure that you don't really need to listen to that video as you're doing our homework see substitute any distraction if you will distraction nowadays it's just like that humming a scene in the background you're plugged in into your headphones without knowing it you have a song playing in the background as you're doing stuff without even knowing it you have a something you have TV show playing the background without even in it so this as if our brains have adapted themselves to constant humming noise in the background and these noises are technological rather than analog rather than the giant EC humming it's a podcast at pleasing our year it's a TV show that you know that you're not really dad interested in but you keep it on anyways you might be wondering why do we keep it off we don't need it well we fear solitude and quietude we fear very much we fear so much that we just have to have something humming in the background like that like that giant AC humming so we can feel the sense of security that we can neglect our responsibility to face this solitude and quietude head-on and here is where a lot of people don't get the self educate don't get to self-actualize is because they fear the solitude so much that they neglect they put away the shun away from any opportunity that they have to sit down quietly and to read a book sit down quietly and to think sit down quietly and to contemplate and to journal this is the entire thing right here this is perhaps one of the biggest obstacles that we all have to face it's this thing it's the constant humming background of anxiety constant humming background of fear of missing out from social media fear of missing out from TV shows fear of missing out from anything from texting texting is especially especially infamous because you're always expecting something to pop up and that expectation creates this fear of stepping away or stepping into solitude and quiet to where you can truly start to self-educate now the last thought experiment which is going to tie everything back together very nicely very very cohesively which is the thought experiment of actually you sitting in a room by yourself imagine if you will this room that I have right here I have a chair it's kind of like a readers chair that it sit on every night once in a while to get some reading done imagine if you will you're sitting in in a room where there's no computer there's no phone there's no TV there are no gaming consoles but a chair and a bookshelf you sit down you're getting a hippie jeebies in your in your chest because withdrawal symptoms are kicking in you're not used to such quiet tune of solitude but then right now you make a very mature decision you've faced that solitude head-on so you sort of embrace it you don't have to read a book if you don't want to but you just embrace that that fear of solitude just embrace that overall restlessness just embrace that overall I don't know what I'm doing I should be doing something but I'm not doing it embrace that fear of having that humming noise removed that contrast that stark contrast of having noises and not having noises embrace that contrast and embrace that sharp decline of mental stimulation and a few day passes three day passes a week passes we're now you start to realize you don't need those things at all you don't need them and now we're getting to a really cool place that process of detoxification is the process of developing the capability of sitting in the room by yourself without a humming air-conditioner in the background without a humming computer in the background without a humming podcast in the background without browsing it in the Internet compulsively that's a really cool place to get to because even because think about it if you can sit down and be chill if you can sit down and be happy if you can sit down and be even keeled imagine this time this time around imagine actually going back to your computer if your baseline happiness if your baseline tolerance of stimulation is is already pretty darn high imagine adding computer on top of that you're gonna feel a lot happier when you're now engaged with texting with social media with internet they're gonna be a lot happier but it's not really the case that you're gonna be happier your overall goal is to seek more happiness out of your steaming relations and distractions but really if you go back right now if you've developed its capacity to be quiet and to be and to be peaceful with solitude then really if you go pick up a book right now you're gonna have this it's very hard to explain a very subtle taste and a sort of very inexplainable inner peace I'm sort of sounding like I'm some spirit for a hippie guru but no really this is something really practical there's a inner sort of stillness idleness this in a really deep sense of concentration now you start to slowly develop and with that concentration you can do anything you can finish your homework on time you can read the books that you want you can self educate you have so much more time to spend with family with friends with a boyfriend or a girlfriend so basically this capacity to deal with the lack of humming noise is gonna make you more intentional with your time it's gonna make him more in tune with self-education more in tune with yourself so to speak and more in tune with her surroundings and with that capacity that you've developed then can you move on to deeper levels of self-education then can you move on to deeper levels of becoming an autodidact den can you actualize maybe you have a dream of speaking five different languages then can you really actualize that dream of learning other languages because you are free from the humming noise because you're free from those humming noise from wasting your time and you're no longer afraid of having those noise of dividing your free time of those noises now you're totally free so just to wrap everything up develop a capability or a capacity for solitude it's gonna pay you back dividend Lee in the long term it's gonna really uh I've been experiencing this in my own life recently ends quite it's quite sweet I can just sit there the thought of just sitting there and to just be still and happy it's almost we are so out of touch with I bring up two people people kind of laugh at me people say I'm a boring person with a stick up my ass because why would you sit there if you can you know go on your computer well this is a deeper sort of satisfaction that most people go most young adults or most of us don't really get to experience and pretty lucky to experience that and that's why I'm sharing this with you guys it's really it's indescribable it's indescribable you have to go do it yourself to experience it it's really a deep sense of groundedness so I'm not gonna waste more of your time here I'm gonna be shutting off shutting this camera off hope you guys learn something from this video hope you guys apply what you've learnt hope you guys you know follow through with all the thought experiments and I really hope you guys enjoyed this message Robin here friend of quirky inquiry and now I should be signing off right now

Channel: R.C. Waldun

Views: 29,785

Rating: 4.96875 out of 5

Keywords: how to deal with loneliness, how to deal with loneliness and depression, solitude, how to be comfortable alone, how to read more books, autodidact, renaissance man, how to become a polymath, how to be well read, how to read a book a day, how to read a book fast, education, self education, polymath, commonplace book, the quirky inquiry, robin wu, distractions, technology

Id: TfMZoMDnZec

Length: 14min 10sec (850 seconds)

Published: Fri Nov 09 2018