Why do you hate your English? | The Psychology behind it. | By Dr. Sandeep Patil.

[Music] my english is horrible my vocabulary is poor my pronunciation is not good i have mother tongue influence i get stuck while speaking i'm horrible in english this is what i hear from students every now and then many people i have seen hate their english they don't like their english they hate their accent they had their pronunciation they had every aspect of their english my dear friend in this video i will tell you why you hate your english and why this affects your english and also other aspects of your life maybe i am the only youtuber who has applied the conventional psychology into english communication because i believe that english communication is more about mindset it's more about your thinking and less about english this is my 19 years of experience which has taught me this and after training hundreds and thousands of students and seeing the results i am sure 100 percent that english communication english speaking is more about the way you think about english and less about grammar or less about vocabulary or less about all those things which we think are more important if you have this problem and i'm sure you are watching this video it proves that you also have this problem you also hate your english if you hate your english if you feel like my english is not good then watch this video till end i will give you all the psychoanalysis i will do all the analysis the way you think and the way you look at your english and at the end i will give you a solution which will help you to be a better communicator dear friends in the comments every day i see comments students telling me that sir due to your video my english has improved and more confident speaker thanks a lot for your comments dear friends thanks a lot and one more thing i want to tell you i want to thank you with my folded hands that i have crossed 3 lakh subscribers thank you all of you for this for this love for this respect you have bestowed on me i will continue making such more videos which will help you to be a better communicator to be a good speaker to get better jobs and to have a better life that is the mission of my life so please continue this video and this video will be very helpful for you let us start well friends as i said um when i tell my students you know i i have online training sessions there are hundreds of students from india and abroad also whenever i talk to these students i tell them that the first step towards english communication towards fluency is not any reading not any listening not grammar at all not any theory but practical practical comes first i say the horse comes first before the cart carter doesn't come first horse comes first what do i mean i mean first is speaking you have to open up your mouth and you have to communicate with fluent or non-fluent speaker there is no other way it's like communication is like like swimming you know if you want to be a good streamer you cannot go and take down the notes it's of no use you have to go and plunge in the water but many many many 95 in fact 99 of the speakers 99 of my students tell me this so my english is not good so my vocabulary is not good sir my pronunciation is not good my accent is not good my english is horrible i'm this i'm that i'm that hey of course that's the reason why they have come to me i know that their english is not good but i'm not saying that their english is fantastic but what i'm saying is they criticize their english too much actually they think that english is too bad than actually it is you're getting my point they think like my english is here but actually from my experience i can tell that their english is here yeah they have to go here but what they think is very negative about their english then what is the reality i mean and this stops them from communicating with others because they think that sir as my english is not good then how can i speak how can i speak to a confident speaker how can i speak to a native speaker i can't speak i can't take the calls because i work in iit industry i work in a global industry i work in hotel industry i'm a teacher my students will laugh at me then how can i do it well this kind of thinking had some psychological reasons which i will analyze now friends understand there are three reasons behind this kind of thinking there are three reasons behind hating your own english first is black and white thinking now what is black and white thinking black and white thinkers these thinkers they think in only black or white not in between black means failure white means success they think that either i am black or i am white and of course what they think black only they don't think about white they think i am failure same thing they apply for english also my english is black it is not white therefore it is not it is only black they do not consider any other shade in between in between black and white there is another shade gray shades are there but they think my english is horrible it is bad it is worse vocabulary is nothing but when i listen to their english i see that they are not that bad they are better actually some are very good they are fantastic but they still think their english sucks this is the first reason because black and white thinking they think that if i'm not virat kohli then i'm a failure white or black no in between second second reason what happens is in our childhood we have been continuously compared with our friends with our siblings with uh with someone who is better than us by our parents by our teachers by our friends also and due to that a low self-esteem low self-respect develops and due to that we hate ourselves we do not like any aspect of our personality we do not like our looks we do not like our our body we do not like our english communication we do not like our marks we do not like our job we think that except me everyone is good because since childhood we have been compared to others and that is one of the reason why we do not like our english or we underestimate our english third reason is there this is something from uh tv or youtube videos which which goes in your head that is called as the achievement obsession you know in this world of achievers in this world software achievers are like god when you see india's got talent or when you see oh my god tv programs when you see america's got talent when you see this 10 year old kid dancing 12 year old kid doing phd and all you you your self-esteem goes down and you consider you are hopeless your failure because you compare yourself with them and due to that same thing happens with english also when you see someone is very fluent you think you are worse when you see people like hacha bogle or venezue people like shashi saru you say uh i am zero compared to them this is one of the reasons why you hate your english dear friends these are the reasons why we hate our english that in fact i have seen people they hate their own voice they don't like their own voice they hate their own voice they hate everything they have and not only it affects your english communication it affects every aspect of your life now let me give you the clarity let me tell you what is the fact we have to get our thinking right because we always always always think in a wrong way we have lot of cognitive distortions we have lot of thinking errors why do we do that because i think that we are fallible human beings i think that we are human beings with lot of thinking errors most of the time our thinking is wrong most of the time our thinking is self-helping not self-helping self-hurting so first thing i want to tell you is this you cannot do like black and white thinking you cannot be worst in english or best in english no we are in between we can't compare like okay this guy is best in english we don't know there are many people who are better than him okay so you are not black you are in between gray between black and white you're in between that so this is a thinking error storm that the reality is different my english may be somewhere gray maybe towards more side of white but i am not white i'm not black i'm in between that so don't say my english is worst it's bad don't use this negative vocabulary the words which you use to define your personality have a huge impact on your mind so be aware next time don't say your english is worst say your english is average say your english is improving say say that my english is getting better but it's not worst if you think in this way you will not have confidence to speak with anyone else second thing your parents have compared you with someone else yeah fine it's okay they have compelled it but you don't need to take them seriously everyone is different everyone has his way of living life you can't compare a fish with a monkey a fish can swim in water a monkey can climb a tree so you can't abuse a monkey that you are not a good swimmer than fish because monkeys are designed to climb the trees fish are there to swim there god has designed to make them good streamers so whatever your parents your friends have said forget that and just be you whatever you are and that is what i did in my life and today i'm here i don't worry about what people say about me third point i want to tell you is achievements see remember one thing you have to accept yourself with achievements and without achievements only getting material achievement is not success only having fancy degrees is not success only getting popular is not success accepting yourself with achievements and without achievements is called as success and when you follow these three things you will start liking yourself and when you start liking yourself you will like your english you like your voice you will like yourself you will like your looks you will like your small small achievements and when you do that you will feel better about your english you better about yourself and you will go and face confident speakers and you will not compare your english with them because tomorrow your english is going to be better than them it will take you some months but it is going to be better than them there are many people who are worse than you in english you are better than them in english so stop comparing keep on working on your english what i say is don't say your english is worst say you are improving keep on working on your english keep on improving your english but don't rate your english as worst or bad because english is a continuously improving continuously evolving process dear friends next time when you go and speak to confident speaker please don't say my english is not good say i'm improving so friends write in the comment i accept myself and i accept my english write in the comment i accept myself and i accept my english okay go ahead and speak up my best wishes for you hope this video is helpful to you go to my linkedin go to my facebook page you will find lot of such tips which will help you to feel good which will help you to think right which will help you to bed to be a better communicator and overall to be happy and successful person thanks a lot again for your subscribing my channel and definitely i am going to fulfill my promise by giving you best content on this channel thank you and goodbye

Channel: Dr. Sandeep Patil

Views: 27,190

Keywords: learn to speak english, how to improve english, mastering english, dr.sandeep patil, Sandeep Patil, english speaking tips, how to speak fluent english, how to speak english fluently, how to speak english, how to speak in english, cofidence, english tutorial, speak english, how to speak english naturally, Tips to speak in english, speak english connfidently, how to speak in English, how to read, benefits of reading, book reading, hoe to understand a book, 2021, english tips

Id: XzUnfRHP1Ws

Length: 12min 46sec (766 seconds)

Published: Wed Feb 24 2021