WHY DO MEN CHANGE AFTER MARRIAGE

[Music] welcome to C reflection thank you thank you so much for watching our episodes thank you so much for commenting thank you so much for subscribing professionals but today today I am not alone I have a guest but now this guest is not a professional this guest is not even a specialist experience this is just a just just a guest to say you guys keep on asking for him so meet Timothy Kim Timothy please come just a guest like are you a specialist please please come they asking for you they've been asking for you let us CL for him yay please please put your phone away this guest is stuborn introd just a guest you're not a specialist you're not a introduce how will you introduce yourself a friend uhhuh um cute guy or something just find something okay so guys meet Mr cute guy yay Welcome to our show yeah and I keep telling guys in the comment section kindly keep saying bring him again and again and now that you're if he won't come unscribe no they're not going to unsubscribe mhm now that you're here now that you're back here thank you so much for coming I leave my own things this one yes this one I must pay you for your let's continue really let's continue I'm just a guest let's continue so today I want us to talk about how things change mostly dating versus marriage but there just how marriage marriage yes I might just be a guest not an expert but at least I know how to say marriage you know Mar you don't have to SP every word every so no it's okay marage marriage so today you're talking about how things and especially how men change after marriage noten scared afid am I afraid am I [Music] scared [Laughter] wried top now with that said can you now relax and be a guest in this case I might just be a guest Mr Timothy can you please relax and be a guest s so today I want us to talk about how men last week let me take you back last week makeup so of course I'm expecting Mr don't see Mr Timo in this case let's let's keep it professional okay I thought my husband who is another over there I looked good to my surprise expect first thing did he tell you he looked good yes he did did he yes stop lying he did not continue do you know him continue so that takes so that made me wonder what are those things that your person does then it got me thinking it's like it's like men go to a certain school after they get married it's like they go to a certain schol some certain things not a bad thing but it makes me wonder not bad but a certain place that will make the person be excited at this point I'm worried for Mr Timothy so do you people go to a certain school's conference what changes do you women go for a certain what changes what changes we change you don't see yourself and this a problem because now in in our experience in this field um it takes to to tango so when you see your partner has changed ask yourself what might be causing the change because also alternatively we can be able to say as a woman you have changed you no longer do the growth you used to do and if you do you're not doing it for me as well then you're doing it for your girlfriends you're going for a girlfriend's out you wear some very short but whenever I am around or I want that to happen no I'm just saying it's just you call me here to talk so don't tell me the problem I have I'm telling you the problem you have and you're not listening so um it takes two to tle so we might change but have you asked yourself as a woman how have you changed you get my point neet does Mr see this that's why whenever you are like no that's let me tell you whenever you are doing that when you're doing that makeup who are you doing it for for my audience for you get my point and for myself exactly no I'm saying that time he took you away because that is not out yeah he took you away of course my point is how many times do you look good for Mr Timothy so the the point is we don't look good for Mister we look good for ourselves okay even back then during dating we were looking good for but let's talk the truth when we were dating we are doing things for each other that's what we used to do but now when you're married you start doing it for yourself it's okay to do it for yourself but my point is when you were dating it was very different I was doing everything before my girlfri came that's my question you get my point expect but when I am I'm dating you why because I am campaigning we are doing things that get me right in a man's life I don't know about women but in a man's life there is before you how I used to live I used to be carefree that's the first me then when you are almost there the pre whatever now when you're coming into the picture I start acting in a different way like for example I remember when I was meeting my girlfriend I used to use- you get but when she came see do things that are close to me maybe it's old we we' get there yeah it's old but you see when you came into my life I had to change for you as a girlfriend because as a girlfriend there's some parameters Myck those parameters the same way on the other side you as a woman you as a girlfriend there are things you used to do kaka kaka is not happening anymore you want to be taken out are you getting my point time exactly my point time I hosted a professional Mr M don't expect this person to change when you're dating this guy do not expect this person to change you don't even make the bed and that's why I keep you don't even open the curtains when you wake up the last some of the relation ship that last long are those that you start out as friends not the ones that I meet you and I'm trying to AAS you because when I'm trying now that was Mr MTI and now this this is Mr babati Mr babati is saying once that's very true about what Mr M and I watch that what I'm saying is yes just hear me out look more than me now listen um my point is it's very true how he is but how is that point when do you know how that person is you get my point you must go back to when he was not trying to get as friends because that's why you know my true colors let's say for example I had a friend called DNE DNE knew me as a boys I had a friend called she used me as a boy so if there's a girl who wanted me she could go to if let's say for example something happened and Anette or dhne we ended up together she knew me for who I was before I was trying and that's what happened came she's like I am seeing and it's always good I was seeing someone else she was seeing someone else yet we are so good friends so she saw me before I started so so now that as friends I unfortunately I know but my point is are we true to each other while dating so that it doesn't so that we are not surprised because surprised and I knew who I was before I started changing for a girlfriend yeah because back in the day Mr Timothy would make his bed wash his beddings but that is Timothy who was looking for sesting so now you wait me to go things change also time changes let's appreciate the fact that time changes right now do you expect me to wash it's not that I cannot La BK yes I expect this person there's a point as a good person but my question is I'm not being dramatic but I have a question I have a question you call me talk let me talk I have a question my point is really no listen hear me out and you know me very well exactly and that's how men are made because for me yeah why because ask me in another episod that you're going to bring me here I always ask because I know jacket like how we think is- two days so I have two more days maybe instead of taking a new t-shirt I take a t-shirt then so I'm not cond [Music] before you came into my life I used to live but you you never used to throw socks from when you come become complicated yes we need you your life becomes easier relax Mr Timothy okay thank you relax but you get my point we were okay before you came into our life you are okay before I come why do I come and change your life I don't want to come and change but my point is problem I wake up last and I expect anyway let's not get into this we'll come to that it's another whole topic Al together but my point is why do I feel suffocated in my own space as a man and that's why you find people are building beautiful homes but they spend a little time in those houses because you are suffocating them when I come and sit down I want to en something you want to watch another what do I do I move you getting my point we are feeling suffocating that's why it's different from dating from dating we like goodbye then I know for the rest of the time I'm alone throw the socks the way out but when we come we are living guided we are being shephered it's zero grazing so does it mean most men will prefer for them to date forever that's not what I'm saying because if marriage is suffocating most men because I'm not saying marriage hear me out it's individuals marriage has never suffocated anyone okay so does it mean this individuals this who throw socks everywhere does it [Music] mean you get my point my you get MyWay question that's a topic for another day question about killing plants and in this country we have a pandemic of people who are killing plants mmy what do you call yourself mommy parent PLS plant parents anyway I'm not getting there my point is can we be able to coexist yes we can exactly my point so can we be able to make each other's life easier H how do you think i' make your life easier in marriage as it were let's not forget in dating come I take you out I take you out can you you take your time which is good and you're looking amazing but also time has changed and you realize from when we are dating we have new responsibility that we didn't have you have a kid or two that you didn't have you have some things you taking care of by then you are expecting from your parent right now you're sort of taking care of your parent you get my point we have expectations we have things that are changing so it's it's it's unfair to expect what you used to get then however it doesn't mean we can't have fun think okay because this is where we are we have other things that are taking priority get let's say for example health insurance do I not take insurance it's you I'm talking to oh no I need both what if I'm not able okay we have priorities have changed now this makes me wonder so what if I'm not able of course we discuss you overing the honeymon you are you overing the honeymoon honeymoon tell that person she's overstaying the honeymoon what is what if you cannot have your cake and eat it what if there's this thing that they say dating monthly what it's called monthly what allowance girlfriend allowance when you start now when you get into marriage your monthly wife it's because what's your take on that time has changed After Time have changed time for me I think we we fail to factor in time we Factor everything else we hold everything constant but Time Has Changed time has changed a lot has changed to some you might be complaining maybe to something changed for the better yeah from shoing Shing so ask yourself so as long as time change change for the better doesn't mean [Music] now better do you know you've had better dates than you were having when [Music] dating do you know you've had better dates yeah than you ever had while dating but only this time when you do your makeup is when you're complaining I'm not complaining human this is another topic we'll cover some other time when you'll call me when people ask for me as human we we we and ites you getage explain what happened before this car action explain to them what happened oh there was an alarm that was making noise now we are back so cabbage as you are saying and we should be psych we should be psyched now as we are saying cabbage cabbage has a lot of flaps okay and and I I tend to think human mind that's how we are you to think something something wrong so then you get another cage same thing it's not give me an opportunity if you know you know but that's not where I'm going that's no I'm saying if we are saying this have changed things used to be very but that's not my point that's not my point my point is let let's try and do with what we have realize no you realize that you're not alone don't remember you need the strength to stay with your realize that it's not only in my house everywhere you never talk about your problem exactly not problem are you my problem you get you're actually acknowled you are actually the problem in the relationship no like challenges you men never discuss women we are very that's not a challenge socks it's not a challenge like that's for me I can live with that men live with their consequences but women will find it very hard to live with their consequences if for example there's a joke that is told about um about a man who married a lady this lady could not cook could not wash could not do anything you get but whenever they went home he was asked why do you love this woman he said if only you knew that was the only answer he had so men choose to see to live with their ISS issues if only you knew which is not a good thing and then up you can be able to talk but maybe whatever you will get something else to say there's always something else but now there are some things it's good to realize two things there are some things that are solvable others are not solvable others to coo some we come from um I came to realize we come with a lot of back back whatever what do we call thiso bage we come with bage you come with your own baggage some things we can sort like for example if someone grew up with um um not basket did you have basket didn't it started as as a laundry basket it ended up as a storage B basket so my point was where was I you come up with those you come with yes yes yes yes yes yes so I'm expecting you and not able let's for examp I have childhood traa yeah from whatever maybe from my parents whoever then I come I'm trying to to get it on you CU I've seen things happen and it's not true on the other hand you're not understanding where I'm coming from we said when we dating we don't tell each other the truth which is wrong so from so that it's not so different tell each other the truth there's a song song about someone who married a woman and he used to tell her I'm able to build then this lady comes and [Music] lives this lady left but when down so who was on the wrong yeah atast you are told we never tell each other the truth when we dating that's the problem tell me the truth show me your true colors there some people who are saying when we get into that I won't ask for more because you said it's true you get my point so um let's tell each other the truth as I finish because I'm not going to be paid in this particular episode let's um tell each other the truth when you're dating so that when when we get married there's no much difference each other do you know we don't even know we don't even talk about our parents when we are dating like do you know how my my my father met my my wife it's a very interesting story so we are seated and I think I'm going to close with this and one more story about I have a question okay you first say your story no just say and then I have a question cuz now not all men are like that not all of them were Cru socks we have very neat men whether dating whether in marri trust me every person is a cabbage you will find something there's always gonna be something there's always gonna be something and you see howage and you see how a cabbage so that's what we need to so just [Music] by so you together this you can handle this cabbage as e you can hand so that means in every marriage there's that cabbage [Laughter] you get yeah I get it yeah so I'll finish off with the story two stories one how I met my your mother how I met How I Met Your Mother now How I Met Your Mother it's how no how my father met my wife it is a very funny story it's actually not funny because we we talk about them but we've never met we've never created those it's sort of a like you're very rigid to make your parents meet your fian quote unquote how did they meet I know I thought You' never ask so I was graduating at the keny communication and I didn't call for anyone for the graduation because I thought two days to the the last three four years so my dad was like you know what we're going to come with your mother so they I think our family friend from Jo what seems like five minutes it was a very silly I don't know who told us to sing the Min so we a song very anyway and then is asking where are we going nobody knew you're dating [Laughter] can you put it on mute so nobody so they didn't know so they didn't know you dating who your parents who you know what happened we had a again ask okay so they didn't know your dating who your parents my parents they didn't know man so so where did you tell your parents when you dating yes a boyfriend is a boy who is your friend anyway now my father insisted we go I wait for what let me ask you something another Sid no like for you it was bad it was bad why it was bad because growing up we never talked about boyfriend girlfriend and my mom used to playay for my wives another s so I'll go [Laughter] down okay over now it's over now where are we so yeah my we never talked about relationships and especially girlfriend [Music] now so we get to lunch and my dad another uh 20 okay this time I won't shout but um we never talked about it so this time now and we get served so my dad SE this lady she was in a dress do I remember that photo dress dos and and it was a beautiful beautiful dress [Laughter] white now so we we we we get to sit down but then myad me you know who is this I was [Laughter] like she's my friend oh okay it was the longest lunch I've ever had it was the longest lunch but how enjoying I think we got to we got to this is my friend is it a trick question I'm like [Music] um years can you do this can you de thank you so much let me W it up in a story it's for everyone to play part in it don't don't say for it to work we must play a role in this all of us together um and you might say own I don't care what you do effect I have my own life but at the end of the day for this thing to work it takes two um there's a story that is given about a rat a co co and a goat PA was very concerned and he went and told everyone [Music] [Music] so the child bed to death for make it work we must be and with that ladies and gentlemen thank you so much Mr Timothy thank you for your nice stories thank you for for yourbody we need to be don't we that's a story for another day men are like that not in a bad way but men are like that to be honest with you sometimes it even feels good no sometimes not every time so when is those times you want me to give you the chance of well every day thank you so much but thank you so much for coming you see I don't have to tell them watch one of the firsts I don't have to say anything I don't know how I do it but thank you so much guys in Cas you want you don't [Music] have professional any topic you have just in the comment section tell us what you want us to deal with okay yes so thank you so much guys thank you for watching please remember to subscribe see you next week on C reflection bye-bye thank you so much I'm quite thank you thank you Mr Timothy thank [Music] you [Music] oh

Channel: Celestine Ndinda

Views: 228,539

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Id: 7lTIvKQQzJA

Length: 43min 11sec (2591 seconds)

Published: Wed Dec 06 2023