When A Setback Leaves You Emotionally Empty by RickWarren

now this weekend I want to share part 5 in my series on how God turns setbacks into comebacks you know all of us have to deal with many many different kinds of setbacks of life financial health relational job setbacks career setbacks personal setbacks spiritual setbacks many many other kinds but today I want us to look at what do you do when a setback leaves you emotionally empty you know one of the common negative side effects of setbacks is that they can drain your emotional tank empty so you've got no reserves for dealing with daily life you know what I'm talking about you just feel empty you feel like you're running on fumes you got nothing left to give you drag yourself through the day now in last week's message Sheila Wallace referred to Elijah and this week I'd like to go back and take a little closer look at the life of this guy named Elijah because Elijah clearly illustrates for us how God helps us when we're drained emotionally now if you know anything about this man named Elijah in the Bible you might not expect him to have experienced emotional burnout because God did so many amazing things so many miracles in and through Elijah's life and yet the Bible tells us in James 5:17 quote Elijah was a man just like us what does that mean it means he was susceptible to the same troubles in the tension same temptations same moods that we all face every single day now from one particular setback in Elijah's life that we're gonna look at today God shows us both the warning signs of when you are emotionally empty you need to know these signs you need to know the gauges in your own life and it also more important it gives us the steps that God uses to refill your life with hope and joy and love when you have just hit bottom your tank is emotionally empty now there's fascinating story in first Kings chapter 19 but actually it starts a chapter before in chapter 18 and here's the background Israel was being led by very wicked King then a hab and his wife named Jezebel you've probably heard of them the nation had fallen into moral bankruptcy that the whole nation had turned away from God to worshiping stone idols and there were even sacrificing their children it was a very brutal bloody religion to two idols named Bale there was only one true prophet of God left in the nation his name was Elijah and one day Elijah just gets fed up with all of this idolatry and he issues a challenge he goes how long are you guys the nation how long you gonna waver between two opinions if the Lord is God follow him and if the idol Bale is God will then follow him and he boldly suggested let's have a god contest this is a great idea and he's pretty bold in it so the entire nation gathers on Mount Carmel in the Land of Israel and Elijah says okay here's here's the plan we're gonna have a god contest we're gonna sacrifice two bulls and we'll let the 450 prophets of this false god name bail you guys go pray to your idol and then I'll pray to the real God and here's the key whoever answers with fire wins the god contest and after that we will worship and serve whoever God wins and the people goes great idea well the prophets of bail they go first and they build their far their their wood and they they put the cows on on the wood and they pray all day and they chant all day and they dance all day and nothing of course happens and of course Elijah is teasing them the whole day in fact even makes fun of him he says is you gotta sleep at one point this is actually in the Bible he says maybe your God's going to the bathroom right now he can't hear you maybe you need to shout a little louder maybe sitting on the toilet and he makes fun of and of course they fail that evening Elijah says okay let's really it's my turn so let's make this a real contest here's what I want you I don't I'm not just gonna call on God to send down fire but I want you to soak the wood on my side of my sacrifice with all barrels of water so that the wood is actually waterlogged okay we're gonna make it a little tougher for me and then Elijah prays a very simple prayer it's in first Kings chapter 18 verses 36 to 38 it's here on the screen and it says this at the time for the evening sacrifice Elijah went up to the altar and he prayed it's a very simple prayer Lord I know you're the God of Abraham and Isaac and I Israel now prove that you are the real God and that I am your servant and show these people that you told me to do this Lord answer my prayer so these people will know that your God and the date will change their minds and it says out of that simple prayer he didn't have to pray all day it's just a couple sentence prayer then the fire from the Lord came down and burned up not just the sacrifice and all the wood but it also burned up the stones and the ground around the altar and it dried up all the water in the ditch now the people are astounded they began to worship God and they rose up and they go all you other false prophets you have been leading as astray for years and they got so mad at all false prophets they killed him for all their years of deception and the sacrificing of their children that these false prophets had been requiring and there was a great spiritual revival but of course with every mountaintop there's a valley and in the next scene chapter 19 the first Kings Queen Jezebel hears about it and these were her personal false prophets and she gets ticked she's mad now notice on your outline at the top of your outline first Kings 919 of verses 1 to 5 and then verse 10 it says this so King Ahab told his wife Jezebel everything that Elijah done and how he had ordered the death of other false prophets of bail so the Queen sent this threat to Elijah may my gods strike me dead if I don't kill you by this time tomorrow Wow it's a death threat the Queen Elijah it says was afraid and he ran for his life he left his servant in the town of Beersheba and he walked for a full day into the desert finally he came to a broom tree and he collapsed under its shade and then he prayed that he might die he said God I've had enough take my life just let me die for I'm no better than my ancestors and exhausted he fell asleep under the broom tree later down in verse 10 it says Elijah told God God I have always worked hard for you Lord but your people have abandoned your covenant they've destroyed your places of worship and they've murdered all your true prophets and I'm the only one left and now they're trying to kill me too this guy's on the edge he's empty emotional he's on the edge of burnout now from this story we can draw a lot of lessons from what happened that deal with your life in my life today and how God turns setbacks into comebacks this story first of all illustrates 10 signs of emotional burnout 10 signs they're all in Elijah's life when you're emotional tank is empty you need to know these signs so you can respond but more importantly it teaches us how God refills your emotional tank when you're empty okay so let's get right into it first how do I know when my emotional tank is empty well look at what Elijah says and look at what Elijah does there are 10 things they're all underlined in that passage they're on your outline let's just go through them very quickly first I know I'm emotionally empty my tank is empty when that happens number one fear creeps into my life you start becoming more fearful the Bible says Elijah was afraid when fear comes in your life it's because your emotional tank is is empty number two I find myself running away from things when I'm running out of energy ammo the Bible says Elijah ran for his life question what are you running from right now what are you running from it's a sign that you may be emotionally low on gas number three I start backing out of relationships notice the third thing that says he left his servant in the town of Barre Sheba this is a guy had been with him for a long long time and he's just walking away from him are you walking away from a relationship that can be drink that can show that you're emotionally drained from all the stuff you're going through number four you might write this down I make foolish decisions impulsively when I'm emotionally drained I make foolish decisions impulsively it says he walked for a full day into the desert okay question how smarts that to walk for a full day in the desert first he's headed in the wrong direction and second he's got no plan he's not taking water with him he's walking in in the wrong direction with no plan that's a sign that you're on the edge of burnout a sign that you're making foolish decisions impulsively number five I pushed myself passed my physical limits write that down if you're doing that you're headed for burnout you push yourself past physical limits I can get more done than I think it does it says he collapsed under the shade of that broom tree okay he just kept walking and walking into the desert until finally he just collapsed number six when you're physically or spiritually or emotionally burned out when you are on the edge of emotional emptiness my work seems pointless notice the phrase there he says I've worked hard but he says I really haven't seen any results I haven't seen anybody change he says nobody's making any change that the nations still in a mess and they're still serving false gods in there offering sacrifices to idols and he blamed himself for things that weren't his fault now the nation's falling apart and he takes it personally he goes on with failure you know one of the great causes of burnout is trying to control everything this Atlas syndrome friend you couldn't resigned as general manager of the universe it's not gonna fall apart because the whole world does not rest on your shoulders there are a lot of things that are beyond your control and you're not responsible for other people's response in life you know as a pastor I have to deal with this all the time it's my responsibility to teach God's truth but I'm not responsible for what you do with it if I was I'd worry myself to death okay he was just taking too much responsibility number seven a seventh warning sign that your emotional tank is empty I complain that I want to quit and give up that's what Elijah did notice he says god I have had enough it's like God okay I'm up to here I'm at the end of my rope I'm ready to throw in the towel I'm ready to jump off the cliff and when you're emotional tank is low you lose your vision you forfeit your future you forget your goals you just want to give up you want to stop caring Elijah says it's just not worth it I'm ready to throw in the towel now let me give you a couple more number eight when you're emotional tank is low you feel isolated and attacked I feel isolated I feel lonely I feel attacked the notice the phrase Elijah says I'm the only one left okay he's having a pity party I'm the only one left and they're trying to kill me too now the truth is Elijah is exaggerating the problem we always do that when we're emotionally low we make the problem worse than it really is because the truth is in acts 19 Asuza in first Kings 19 verse 18 look at this on the screen God says this actually Elijah there are seven thousand other faithful souls in Israel who have not bowed down their knees to the false god a bail so you're not the the guy you're not the only one quit having a pity party there's 7,000 other people have been faithful to me who haven't gone off the rails who've been true - - to me but Elijah is so drained emotionally his view of reality is distorted I mean think about this he's just had this enormous God contest where he wins against 450 false prophets in front of the entire nation and now just one woman with an empty threat is a setback and he's running off the hide in a cave think about this if Jezebel had actually intended to kill him wouldn't she have sent a hit man instead of a messenger to warn him why have you send a messenger to warrant a guy and say I'm gonna kill you just send again kill him and I warned him so he can escape so he's not thinking straight because he's emotionally drained number nine the ninth sign that you are on the verge of burnout is I compare myself to others and I feel bad about me now we talked about this many times the Bible says anytime you compare yourself to other people it's foolish the Bible tells us not to compare ourselves with others and and and Elijah says for I'm no better than my aunt ancestors we depreciate our worth when we feel burned out we put ourselves down mentally we the self-talk we plays over and over in your mind I'm nobody my life doesn't matter my work doesn't matter my life has no value note the phrase I'm no better than that's a comparative phrase one of the main causes of being emotionally drained is you start comparing yourself to other people you compare everything and then you start motivating yourself with criticism I must I should I have to and you become hyper critical and you become your own worst critic and finally you feel guilty for not getting it all done and just say it's hopeless offense what I'm talking about right now is called emotional reasoning it's focusing on your feelings instead of the fact I feel it so it must be true you know every pro athlete every pro performer speaker musician minister they often didn't get discouraged after great performance after every mountaintop there is a valley you're emotionally depleted so you can't think straight and what you have to do is you have to learn to ignore your emotions learn to ignore your feelings I don't ever make any decision the day after Easter or Christmas because my feelings are highly unreliable you know I remember one time when Kay and I were on the honeymoon and I said you know I don't really feel married she said well done better with you feel it or not Buster you're married maybe you say I don't feel God is with me well feelings lie that's emotional reasoning let me give you number 10 a tenth sign that your tank your emotional tank is empty is what Elijah did and that is I think death might bring relief notice it says Elijah prayed that he might die and he says take my life Lord just let me die now let me just say to those of you who are listening right now whether you're on the internet or on daily Hope or in one of our campuses maybe you felt that just dying would be the way to relief and you think maybe taking my life would be the way to do that don't don't taking your life is a permanent solution to a temporary mood don't there are people who care we care we love you and you need to get help and don't never make a major decision when you're depressed now of these ten things you look at that as a checklist looking at that now do you realize why James tells us in James 5:17 Elijah was a person just like us because you can identify with a lot of those 10 things now that's good enough in itself but this passage has even more to share with us and it teaches us how God refills our emotional tank and I want you to notice now the next three things that God does in spite of all the things that uh Elijah did when he ran out of gas emotionally okay so let's look at these three things write these down number one the first way God refills my tank is God makes me rest my body God makes me rest my body Psalm 23 two and three from the most famous Psalm in the Bible is this he makes me lay down in great lie down in green pastures he leads me beside still waters he restores myself soul sometimes God has to make you lie down because you're not smart enough to do it yourself he's gonna force you to actually recharge your body physically because you're physical you can't be spiritually and emotionally strong while you're physically depleted this is what happened to Elijah first Kings 19 5 to 7 it says then Elisha laid down and slept under the broom tree but as he was sleeping an angel touched him instead get up and eat and he looked around and he saw some baked bread or on hot stones and a jar of water well he's got some doughnuts and so he ate and he drank and he laid down again and he went back to sleep and it says then the angel the Lord came back to him again and touched him again and said get up again and he's some more for there's a long journey ahead of you so Elisha got up again and he ate and drank again and his strength was revived you know what I love about God is how practically is that the antidote to jump to Elijah's burnout was eat and sleep and eat and sleep God's first prescription was food and rest and relaxation God did not scold Elijah he didn't say come on man you're having a pity party he didn't even lecture he just let him sleep sometimes the most spiritual thing you can do is go back to bed take a nap so I'm 127 verse 2 and the Living Bible says God wants his loved ones to get their proper rest it's amazing how different things look after good night's sleep so the first thing God wants to do is if you're emotionally over the edge and you're drained and you're on the edge of burna then you need to take care of your body can I have a phrase at our house we call control the controllables there are a lot of things you can't get to you can't control what you eat you can't control your sleep you can't control what you do and your some of those things in your schedule control what you can control God wants you he makes you rest your body that's the first thing some of you might need to go get a check-up with the doctor if you've been going through depression no it's not a sin to be sick it's not a sin to be depressed so go and maybe get a physical checkup and do whatever you need to do here's the second thing God did first he dealt with his physical needs eat sleep eat sleep eat sleep that's his first antidote to us his depression his burnout his empty tank emotional thing second God encourages me to release my frustrations how many times have you heard me say this revealing your feeling is the beginning of healing and we find that in the next few verses first Kings 19 8 and 9 it says this next Elijah traveled 40 days to get to Mount Sinai the mountain of God you know this mountains where God gave Moses the Ten Commandments very famous mountain and it says there he mo Elijah came to a cave where he spent the night so he's run across the desert he's fent the night in a cave in at mount sinai but the Lord said to him what are you doing here Elijah what are you doing here and then Elijah said and in the next few verses Elijah's just unloads his complaints and his frustrations now you know and I think even Sheila mentioned this last week whatever God asked you a question he already knows the answer when God says to Elijah what are you doing here not already knew why a love he wanted Elijah to own up to why he was there and Elijah's answered that question what are you doing here in a cave in Mount Sinai was to start complaining of all the things and in and in that God says I know Elijah you're carrying a bundle of emotions so he says what's bugging you get it off your chest it's okay spill your guts God is encouraging Elijah to blow off some steam and in that cave and in his prayer Elisha vents his frustration and he actually if you go through this passage specifically deals with six emotions verse three he vents his fear verse 10 he vents his anger verse 4 he Vince's vents resentment verse 10 second part loneliness low self-esteem back up in verse 4 worried in verse 10 he says I'm afraid I'm bitter I'm angry I'm lonely I'm worried I'm depressed here's the point God isn't shocked when you can complain to him he'll listen and you'll listen to you until you run out of words have you ever wondered why some of the Psalms during the Bible because every emotion known to man is covered in the Psalms in many Psalms David is just unloading it's kind of cathartic is those God's right now life sucks I don't like what's going on and I don't and he just complains you know what God put those in the Bible for a reason to show that it's okay for you to release your frustration you got to rest your body that's the first step back to refilling your tank rest your body and you got to release your frustration that's the second step back to refilling your tank so if you're feeling down if you're feeling empty you've had a setback and it's caused you to just lose the joy lose the hope lose the love lose the enthusiasm in life then you just need to tell God how you feel first Peter 5:7 says cast all your cares on him because he cares for you just pour out your heart to Jesus by the way let me give you a little tip it helps to share with friends and a small group or a counselor that's why I always encourage you everybody getting a small group you know out on the patio at your campus there we'll be people out there who will help you learn to sign up to a small group if you're not you know when I'm out on the patio when people share their hurts with me and they go they'll say you know pastor Rick I've never told this to anybody a first place I get excited because I know they're gonna have some healing but usually my first question is are you in a small group because if you're in a small group revealing your feeling is the beginning of healing now there's a third thing that God does to help restore and refill our tank when we're empty after setback okay rest your body okay rest your body and and release your frustrations then number three God tells me to remember and refocus on him I need to remember what he said I remember who he is I remember all his promises and I refocus on him you get your eyes off your problem off the troubles off the trials off the temptation and start looking at Jesus you get a fresh awareness of God's power and God's presence God's personality this is the third step in Elijah's recovery and it's found in the next couple verses first Kings 19 verses 11 to 13 now here's the instructions the Lord said to Elisha go stand in front of me in the mountain and I will pass by you and then a very strong wind blew past but the Lord was not in the wind and after that there was an earthquake but the Lord was not in the earthquake and then there was a wild fire but the Lord was not in the fire but then there was a quiet gentle sound a whisper and when Elijah heard it he covered his faith faced with his coat and he went out and he stood at the entrance to the cave and the voice said Elijah why are you still here he's asking the same question again God saying why God says I want you to get alone with me because I got something for you see and God puts on a multimedia event extravaganza for Elijah first of her a wind and hurricane and then an earthquake and then a firestorm and finally a small whisper what in the world is God doing it all this he's demonstrating his power and the point is Elijah you're worried about one woman I'm in control here you can relax you see the route of a burnout the route of being emotionally empty is you're trying to play God you're trying to be God you're trying to control everything and you can't you know Frank Sinatra sang his famous song is actually the theme for his life I did it my way but you know what his last words were what he died I'm losing it those were Frank Sinatra's last words I'm losing it why because he wasn't in control of his life as much as he thought he was and you aren't either let me share another verse from another guy who was emotionally empty is another prophet and his name was Jeremiah and one of the books that he wrote is called lamentations which means my complaints and he writes it for posterity he is releasing his frustrations to God his lamentations he's complaining to God God I don't like this but Jeremiah finds the antidote to his emotional emptiness by remembering how good god is and by doing this third step of refocusing and remembering remembering what God is like and refocusing on what God has said and his promises and and in this verse that I want you to look at and I I want you to write this out on a card put in here on your mirror or on your your dashboard or on your refrigerator he mentions five specific qualities that pull him out of his depression when his emotional tank is empty its lamentation 3:19 224 now let me read this to you and I want you to just let this savor and simmer and soak in your mind Jeremiah says this here Emory's he's down he's he's he's empty he says just thinking of my troubles and my wanderings what's wanderings means you're lost you don't know where you're going you think when I think of my troubles when I think of I haven't the slightest idea where I'm going in life when I think of my troubles and my wanderings it fills me with sadness and bitterness he says it's all I ever think about and I'm depressed but this is the big change here then but then I remember this is step 3 remember and refocus but then I remember something that fills me with hope okay you ready I hope you're listening right now at every campus listening online because what I'm about to read to you from the Word of God will give you an amazing new shot of hope he says then I remember something that fills me fills me with hope and he says five things number one the Lord steadfast love never ends his unfailing mercy keeps me from being wiped out number three because of his great faithfulness each new day he is number four always kind to me so deep in my heart I say to myself the Lord is all I need he is my number five real hope those five things will pull you out of depression out of burnout will refill your tank if you will remember and refocus on those five qualities of God you know a lot of people like chocolate when they're depressed a lot of people turned sugar well in their depression let's go get some ice cream let's go have some pie and a lot of people turn to sugar as an antidote when they're emotionally empty they want to fill up on sugar today I want to give you a different kind of sugar to turn to when you're emotionally empty so everybody get out of pencil and write this down here's pastor rips Rick's prescription it's God's sugar pill for you remember these five things su g AR remember god's steadfast love write that down that's the s remember God's unfailing mercy that's the you remember God's great faithfulness that's the G remember God is always kind that's the a remember God gives real hope that's the r su g AR that's real sugar steadfast love unfailing mercy great faithfulness always kind real hope that'll give you a sugar high it's a high that won't bring you down it's the love of God build your life on those five qualities of God that Jeremiah depended on that pulled him out of his sadness his grief his depression his emptiness after his setback now finally here's the last thing that God says to Elijah first Kings 19 15 and 16 he says to Elijah Elisha go back go back go back the way you came he doesn't go back the way you came to the desert of Damascus and he says when you get there here's what I want you I want you to anoint let's what's anoint it means I'm you're gonna point some other people to help you I want you to anoint kzl I want you to anoint a guy named Jay who and I want you to anoint a guy named Elijah when I want you to go back to where you came from and when you get there want you to know it hey ZL and Jehu and Elijah now what's going on here God gave Elijah a brand new assignment why did God do this because God wasn't through with Elijah and God isn't through with you I don't know what set back your experience right now that's drained you drained your emotional tank you're running on empty you're running on fumes and you may be feeling burned out and out of gas I don't have any well God brought you here today and God brought you here so you could hear these words and so God could say this to you are you ready God says I'm not through with you I'm not through with you I'm not through with you one of the quickest ways to defeat depression get involved in helping somebody else Jesus says and giving your life away you find it Elijah needed to get his eyes off himself refocus on God's purpose and God's plan unit you may be depressed you may be burnt-out you need to stay in love you know III need to go back and do what God wants me to do and by the way notice that in finding a place of service where you can give yourself away that's a major part of seeing what God wants to do in your life but and that's a major part of joy returning in your life and I'm sure that there are people here today who feel like Elijah did some days you don't want to get out of bed some days you feel that everything's piled up against you some of you they are physically and emotionally exhausted you may have a short fuse with other people and no doubt some of you here today have even considered taking your life he's sick and tired of feeling sick and tired there's hope in Jesus he cares and we do too so here's God's recovery plan to get well you got to deal with all these dimensions of your life the physical and spiritual and emotional relational you got to take care of your physical needs okay rest schedule change you got to face and deal with the emotions you're feeling and and you need to release those frustrations you got to refocus and recenter your life around Christ and sugar su GA are those five qualities of God and you got to get involved in helping somebody else you know many years ago back to 1981 I went through an entire year burnout took a full year for me to recover you say how did I recover I followed these steps you will make it with God's help let me pray for you Jesus you know that many people are tired and you know that they're frazzled by their emotions and some of them are empty and there are people here I know that this message has really spoken to them and as we went down through that checklist they were going yep that's me yep that's me yes that is me would you help them today as they turn to you would you restore their soul now you pray say Jesus Christ I want to take these initial steps to refill my tank help me to rest my body help me to do whatever I need to do to get in better shape to to take care of the physical parts of my body that I've been ignoring I've been trying to burn the candle at both ends or whatever and then say Lord I I I need to release I need to release my frustrations and just tell him what you're worried about tell him what you're bitter about telling what you're sad about tell them what you're afraid of tell him what makes you angry he can handle it release your frustrations you may need to take some time off this afternoon or tomorrow or tonight or some other day and and actually spend some time making a list of things you want to share with God and then finally would you refocus and remember God's steadfast love and God's unfailing mercy and God's great faithfulness and remember God is always always kind and remember that he is the source of real hope that's real sugar father I pray for everyone listening today for those who've never opened their lives to Jesus Christ may they do so right now if you've never done so say Jesus Christ come into my life and start changing me from the inside out I want to know you I want to learn to love you and trust you I pray father that you'd bless each person in the sound of my voice in the name of the Father and the Son and the Holy Spirit amen

Channel: Saddleback Church Hong Kong

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Length: 38min 4sec (2284 seconds)

Published: Sun Dec 09 2018