What It's Actually Like Living With ADHD

when i am really interested in something you will have my complete undivided attention and focus so i think that there's a lot of frameworks in which you can talk about mental health that are not just negative hi my name is miranda and i have attention deficit hyperactivity disorder also known as adhd adhd has three types that show up differently and different people the first is inattentive which can look really different for lots of different people but can be things like having trouble focusing on different tasks being seen spacing out a lot misplacing things but usually at a lower energy level than folks that have hyperactivity symptoms the second type is hyperactive which predominantly have traits of high energy someone fidgeting a lot at work or having trouble sitting still and then the third type is combined which mixes sort of a little bit of the two and that's actually the one that a vast majority of people have and that i have as well i do think there's like a stereotype around adhd that folks are super messy for me that wasn't always something i struggled with a ton but i was constantly like misplacing things around the house i definitely fidget a lot but those micro movements really help adhd brains focus because it helps like offload some of the excess energy that we have so for me that can look like using a bouncy ball at work or like knitting while i'm trying to focus on something stationary and it just helps my brain sort of like zoom in on what's happening in front of me as a kid i had a lot of adhd symptoms but like a lot of girls i tended to internalize my symptoms instead of externalizing them so even if i had a lot of hyperactivity so wanting to fidget a lot or get out of my seat i felt a lot of social pressure to really hold that in and not act out girls are three times less likely to get diagnosed with adhd and on average are diagnosed five years later than boys so this is a very common thing of girls really experiencing symptoms but showing them in a way that's a lot more subtle and that teachers and parents are really just not often going to pick up on because of the like archetype of an adhd kid which is predominantly a boy being really disruptive in class so one thing that's really important to know about adhd sort of chemically is that adhd brains lack dopamine dopamine is the reward chemical in the brain and it's often triggered by really small things throughout the day for a neurotypical person so things like cleaning or completing a task on a to-do list release that reward chemical but for people with adhd because we lack sort of a base level of dopamine those things just don't feel rewarding so we seek things that are higher and higher reward which often mean things that are exciting things that are new things that are like really in line with our personal interests and so i definitely saw that as a through line growing up i was really drawn to things that were intense i loved sports and so i was a competitive swimmer i did mountain biking i just kind of tried everything and then i also did a lot of performing arts i did theater singing debate basically anything where i could have like the adrenaline rush of being on a stage and sort of be under that pressure because it made me feel like i was getting that reward that i really was craving so i had seen a therapist on and off since college for anxiety that i was experiencing and the topic of school came up and i described some of the challenges i'd had and sort of offhand she was just like huh that kind of sounds like adhd so from there i actually saw an adhd specific therapist and she put me on vyvance which is a stimulant medication it's very similar to adderall which is the one that most people have heard of i felt like my thoughts were quieter like i could focus on things for longer like time passed a lot quicker i remember the first time i swam in the ocean after i started meds it's my favorite thing i'm usually in the ocean for like maybe 12 minutes but the first time i was on meds i swam for like two hours and i came out and was like shocked and been two hours because i had actually had the experience of getting lost in something which is not what i'm used to another component of adhd is something called hyper focus which basically is the phenomena of when you're doing something you really enjoy you can get like super sucked into it and really lose track of time or just feel like everything kind of falls away like if i'm writing something for example that i'm really into i can like do it all in one go also i make earrings on the side i could hyper focus on really trying to like perfect a design something like that there are many things i enjoy that i don't hyper focus on like swimming playing games hyper focus for me usually is like when i'm creating something because it's something that's really actively engaging for my brain and it feels really good so i want to just keep doing it i work in the advocacy field around reproductive justice and abortion access and i think i was really drawn to that field because it's so engaging and like high stakes i'm an organizer so i'm constantly like talking to new people and building relationships so that part i feel like i really thrive in because of adhd there's also a fair amount of computer admin work which can be really hard with adhd so things like keeping on top of like my check-ins with the people i work with or filling out spreadsheets can be really challenging and i think feel like 10 times harder than the other stuff i do which i think is harder to a lot of people one other thing that's helped me during work and as i'm in so many zoom meetings and being able to like focus on making earrings while i'm doing those meetings has been really helpful to let me like engage part of my brain but also be like actually listening and retaining information a lot better my partner and i have been together almost three years we live together and i think some of the things i still struggle with are especially around like attention in my relationship especially if i'm like absorbed in something and my partner's talking to me it takes me a second to clue into what she's saying or like really enjoy some of the more low-key activities that she likes like watching movies or just like having a slow sunday like that's very much not me so it's been definitely like some work to sort of like match those together one thing that's definitely helped was really like adopting some strategies to make communication work a little smoother for example now if my partner really wants my focus she'll be like hey can i like have your attention to like talk about something and that just signals for me like okay time to focus in before i was even diagnosed with adhd i was definitely helping manage the symptoms with exercise i left weights i box and very much from like a young age felt like i had to exercise several times a week to like mitigate my energy levels and then in terms of things that help me stay organized i use a bullet journal i use google calendar for like everything related to work and then try to like structure my day in an adhd friendly way just to sort of like mitigate sitting still for a really long period of time so one thing that my partner has been very helpful with is the concept of everything has a home in my house in my one bedroom apartment that we share i know where everything goes like my keys go on this hook my bag goes over here i used to leave cups all over the house now i use just like a water bottle so just sort of like implementing structure and like rules around my space has really helped feel more calm and organized so i think often mental health diagnoses are really thought of in a negative light and i think that's really not been my experience and something i really want to make sure is heard like for example i have a lot of energy i think there's a lot of really great things about that like i'm a really good organizer at work because i can be on my feet talking to people for 15 hours a day i can really enjoy exercise or performing or things like that and also when i am really interested in something like you will have my complete undivided attention and focus like more i think even than a neurotypical person and also i just think adhd makes me fun like i like doing exciting things like in the pandemic we got into surfing we built a camper van by ourselves so i think that there's a lot of frameworks in which you can talk about mental health that are not just negative i think since being diagnosed and starting medication and learning tools to actually like intentionally handle the different issues i was having i just have so much more brain space that i'm able to use for the things i actually really love and care about and i just feel like it's opened up so much more potential in me i think back to everything i was able to do before i was diagnosed but how much i was struggling and i just think now i have like the whole rest of my life to just do so much more and feel so much better you

Channel: Goodful

Views: 20,248

Rating: 4.9365077 out of 5

Keywords: Buzzfeed, Buzzfeed Goodful, Disorder, Goodful, Health (Industry), K_fe, Psychological Disorders, Psychology, Therapy, adhd, adhd as an adult, adhd in children, adhd in women, anxiety, attention-deficit hyperactivity disorder, buzzfeed, compulsions, do i have adhd, exposure response prevention, focusing with adhd, growing up with adhd, living with adhd, mental health, mental health awareness, typical day with ocd, what is adhd

Id: Z18t37JpbdU

Length: 8min 37sec (517 seconds)

Published: Thu Aug 12 2021