Valerie Elliot Shepard 1992 at a WIC Conference in Atlanta

can't see anybody's face so it's rather startling to look out into the dark I am thankful to be here I am grateful for my Christian heritage and my topic is to tell you a little bit about passing on my Christian heritage from generation to generation when I was five years old I was asked on the radio what I wanted to be when I grew up and knowing very little of what it meant I said I just want to be a mommy so God has given me that desire that I had when I was a very little girl but I want to be thankful first of all that I had a grandmother and even a great-grandmother and even beyond that I don't know how many generations before them who loved God and who passed on the faithfulness of God to their own children I knew my grandma Howard that's my mother's mother who is in heaven now I knew her best when I was in high school she lived near us I used to spend some time talking to her about her family and what it was like raising six children she told me two things that I remember well about raising six raising her six children and they were that you need to teach your children his respect and you need to teach them obedience and I remember that impressing me very much I knew that grandma Howard was a strong disciplinarian and I guess I decided at that time that I would be a strong disciplinarian come to find out when I became a mother that was a very difficult thing to do I have a soft heart and I'm sure most of you do too and I realized and have realized over the past 16 years that God wants me to be discipled by him before I can really be a strong disciplinarian of my children but she taught me respect and children must respect their parents and honor their parents and that they must obey their parents much of what I've learned about God of course has come from my mother I was an only child and I remember well that she read the scripture to me that she sang wonderful hymns of God's faithfulness to me when I went to bed at night two of them being the Lord is my shepherd and Jesus tender shepherd hear me when I was old enough to understand a little bit about my father's death and my mother told me about his being in heaven because she was at peace about it I think I was able to be at peace about it many people have asked me over the years if I felt resentful or cheated that I grew up without a father and I can honestly say I never did because my mother modeled before me a complete trust in God complete belief that God was sovereign that God was all-wise all-knowing and all present so the truth of my mother's words were an example to me and her faithfulness to God have been a model to me as my grandmother's faithfulness to God and raising six wonderful children have been but when my mother spoke the truth she meant it she never minced or wasted words I knew that she meant what she said when she told me she was going to have to spank me for something I knew she would follow through do you know that has been one of the hardest things for me to do with my own children to follow through on exactly what I said and Elizabeth can attest to that but thank God the Lord has by His grace worked through my weakness and she he has given me a daughter she's actually not my oldest she's my second two oldest I have a son that's 15 years old named Walter but God has given me a daughter in Elizabeth who I can thank him and praise him for because because she does want to please the Lord and that's by His grace that he's given me that in my father the example that I heard about and read about because I was 10 months old when he was killed my father gave me the example of a man who wanted to do the will of God no matter what the world thought of him he was determined to follow God's plan so I've lived with that standard before me a mother who spoke the truth and who trusted in God's faithfulness and a father who obeyed God and went to the alkis not knowing that he would be killed but believing God wanted him to go there I think of the verse do not fear the reproach of men when I think of my father he was willing to leave the unit United States where he had he could have had quite a career because he wanted to reach unreached people obedience to God was the most important to him now I'm sure that many of you may be thinking well I didn't have a godly grandmother or a godly mother or a godly father so I think I can just sit back here and enjoy a story but I don't think I can relate to what Valerie Shepard has to say what I want to challenge you to think and and be shown as my mother would say is the Lord wants to start you on the path of beginning a generation of faithful people whether you're a physical mother or a spiritual mother to many people God will make you and begin in you a legacy that can be passed on from generation to generation and it can begin today so try to relate to what I have to say just in that I'm in 16 years of marriage I'm also beginning not beginning actually because my mother and my grandmother were parents but I'm also trying to raise my children up to believe and trust in the faithfulness of God so what is my portion right now I think of the Israelites and how God told Moses that he was going to provide them with manna they were to go out daily and get their portion that they needed for each of the people in their family and on Saturday or the day before Sabbath they were told to get a double portion to provide for their Sunday so they would not have to go out and collect it on Sunday morning do you know there were some people who didn't believe that and they went out Sunday morning and they know they collected am I getting it mixed up now they did go out on the Sabbath but their mana turned rotten God is is wanting us to believe in him and the thing that grieved him most about the Israelites was their unbelief and I think of how we sometimes face we often face our day ahead of us with unbelief with a fear with a desire to please ourselves rather than to please God God's portion for me right now is to be a mother at home with seven children my oldest one is in high school but I'm homeschooling the rest of them and his word to me is mana but even more than his word the people that he has given me in my home to serve our mana to me because as I feed them physically and try to feed them spiritually I'm learning to feed upon the word who is Christ so God is showing me his faithfulness day in and day out as my grandmother attested to his faithfulness and my mother has attested to his faithfulness God is teaching me his faithfulness and God has given me seven very unique very different children children who will serve Him in different ways who will be members of the body with not the same gifts and this mana or this portion that God has given me right now he's teaching me to be thankful for and God is calling me to pass on his faithfulness to much children and I think of the verse he told he said to one of the prophets do not despise the day of small things my mother began her talk with think small and so there are many many many many small things during a mother's day that she cannot despise because God is asking her to be faithful in little things and the question I must ask myself if I am to examine myself as Paul exhorts us to do is am i content with the manna the word the portion that he has given me today am i thankful for the portion that he's given me today I'll give you a scene that happened about two weeks ago in my house it was about quarter of twelve we were finishing up school and Elizabeth had been sent to the kitchen to start getting the lunch things out she found one lemon yogurt and five other flavors in the refrigerator I had saved them for lunch for that day my children love yogurt flavored yogurt and so she asked me could she have the lemon yogurt is my typical way I often hesitate and I'm not sure what's the right answer and I said I think there might be somebody else that might want wanted Elizabeth I think you might need to be willing to give it up and so of course Jim heard that there was lemon yogurt and Jim had never had lemon yogurt he's my eight-year-old and he was determined to have lemon yogurt also so I suggested they flip a coin do you know in my naivete I've never quite understood how flipping a coin works so I let Elizabeth flip the coin and then I thought no that the way she it ended up I thought no that's not quite right Jim Jim was supposed to get it then because Elizabeth started to question whether that was right or not I said okay I'll flip the coin but I didn't even slip it up in the air I just turned it over in my hand kind of shook it and all of this time thinking inside I'm not quite sure how this is supposed to go the heads and the tails win or the heads wins and the tails loses how does this go so the second time of course Elizabeth won the yogurt Jim was furious he was absolutely furious he didn't think it was fair he began to argue with me I began to argue with him I did not have a meek spirit I was confused inside thinking how should I end this up and as Jim argued more and more the more my voice began to rise as I tried to make my point that I thought I'd done it fairly he didn't think I had flipped the coin right and it got worse and worse and we both were yelling at each other at the end of a few minutes and Elizabeth came to me I told Jim to go to the living room and sit down by himself and Elizabeth came in she said mom I'm willing to give the elimin yogurt to him and I said no it's not right for him excuse me to throw a fit and yell about it and insist that he has it so I went upstairs to my room leaving leaving them of course Jim thinking he's not getting the lemon yogurt and Lizabeth thinking she is and in my utter at being at a loss I got down on my knees and I said Lord forgive me for yelling at Jim forgive me for my confusion forgive me for not knowing what's the right thing and sticking with it and Lord show me how to straighten this all out the whole time Christiana and Colleen and Evangeline were watching the whole thing that's just a scene of a little scene that happens in our day and in one of our days another scene I'll have to just tell you that I felt like the Lord was saying to me ask forgiveness of Jim for getting all upset with him try to teach him a few things in the whole lesson stick with the fact that Elizabeth got the yogurt but teach him that he needs to be thankful even happy even though he doesn't feel like it in that somebody else is getting the pleasure of eating the lemon yogurt teach him to accept my word rather than arguing with me teach him to be quiet and so we did have a time of quiet talk and prayer he was I think stifling all of his arguments still but he had to learn a little bit from that lesson another scene as at the school table when we're all sitting around the kitchen table all of them want my attention at the same time they all have different reasons for needing my attention needing it right away and things get kind of chaotic and I there are many many times when I sit there quietly not in a meek spirit but in a Ear resolve not knowing what God wants me to do and sometimes the kids begin to yell at me and I raise my voice and one time Elizabeth stopped me as we were getting lunch ready and things had gotten too chaotic and she said mom I don't know why you just don't scream at them that would get their attention and I said it may get their attention Elizabeth but I don't think it's the right way to calm everybody down and get control of the situation and so I'm just telling you my weakness is in not knowing the right thing so often and so I get quiet sometimes and everybody is yelling at the same time and I'm thinking inside Who am I supposed to do what to first Who am I supposed to Who am I supposed to send to the bathroom for a spanking Who am I supposed to correct just verbally etc etc God is telling me cultivate faithfulness in little things it says in Psalm 37 trust in the Lord and do good dwell in the land and cultivate faithfulness he is faithful to me he wants me to take teach his faithfulness to my children so he's teaching me in the little things he's teaching me not to despise the little things but to be thankful in them putting away putting away putting away trying to keep a household in order trying to teach my three-year-old and 6 year old constantly to put away closing closet doors after you've finished with the room hanging up your towel neatly putting your toothbrushes back in their holders constantly these half these things happen all day long and God is saying jesus said to his disciples if then you cannot do even a very little thing why are you anxious about other matters Jesus wants me to do a very little thing faithfully and to be thankful in the little things that he has given me to do and I am thankful I can honestly say that the Lord has been renewing my mind to think more thankfully rather than to think in a complaining way not that I have arrived but every day he's showing me little things to be thankful for and little ways to be faithful my children are sinners and up until about six months ago I used to go through short periods of real discouragement and depression because I was such a failure at teaching them to be obedient and teaching them to be respectful as my grandma Howard had told me I needed to do I was such a failure and my children were growing up much worse than I had to hope they would be in being disobedient disrespectful and this Idol that I had of the perfect family was being broken down and I was becoming angry frustrated angry with myself but ultimately angry with God because he wasn't helping me I thought he wasn't helping me to be the perfect mother about six months ago my husband and I began to take a course called sonship by Jack Miller I'm sure some of you have heard of it God has been showing us the gospel all over again through this course he's been showing me that he wants me to love him God wants me to love him more than I love my idols more than I love my own standards he wants me to be devoted to him in the midst of the chaos he wants me to be faithful to him even when I don't like having to clean out the toilet or wash out the diaper and because my children are sinners I'm finally realizing I do not need to be defeated by their sin I don't need to be discouraged by their sin every single one of us is a sinner every single one of us I hope has been touched by God's grace in some way so that we are learning to live above and and without the bondage to sin that we had before we became Christians Satan wants to steal my joy he wants to tell me what a failure I am he wants me to dwell on my my ear' resoluteness my not knowing what to do next my hesitation to do what's right and to be firm and quick in a decision for my children Satan wants to steal away my thankful heart he wants me to ignore the prompting of the Holy Spirit which says go and get Colleen to hang up her towel faithfully rather than me hanging it up because it's so much easier for me to do it than to go find Colleen my rest is now becoming more and more in Christ and not in what I can do God said he will never leave us do we really believe that the times when I've been most joyful and most thankful are when I have realized that God is at my right hand he will never forsake me he will never leave me no matter what my circumstances are no matter how rebellious my children may be he's teaching me to be thankful for each one I'm actually enjoying my teenager more and more than I have ever done before and when he started turning 12 and 13 and he began to show a little bit of a negative attitude in the past six months God has been showing me that loving him is the most important thing I can do right now and and enjoying him loving him and enjoying him and being thankful for him Priscilla Maurice a writer wrote this about being thankful begin with thanking him for some little thing and then go on day by day adding to your subjects of praise thus you will find their numbers grow wonderfully and in the same proportion will your subjects of murmuring and complaining diminish until you see in every some cause for Thanksgiving if you cannot begin with anything positive begin with something negative if your whole lot seems only filled with causes for discomfort causes for discontent excuse me I lost my place sure a lot causes for discontent at any rate there is some trial that has not been appointed you and you may thank God for its being withheld the more you will see how your path and your lying down are beset with mercies and that the God of love is ever watching to do you good do we really believe that the God of love is ever watching to do us good so he's teaching me to be thankful to accept my portion to let the day's trouble be sufficient for the day not to be anxious about tomorrow he's teaching me peace in the lot the heat that he has given me contentment joy and when I have feelings of discontent he's actually the spirit is beginning I'm beginning to open my ears to the spirit saying you no longer need to be bound to thoughts of discontent or thoughts of unthankfulness and I guess what I want to help you all to see is God is so faithful to make his word true in your own life and he is so kind and so generous and so thoughtful towards our own little problems he is faithful he will help me to cultivate faithfulness in my own home I'm not Catherine Howard my mother's mother I'm not Elizabeth Elliott he's helping me to have a Christian home not being able to live up to the expectations I had of myself or even that I thought my mother might have of me never being able to live up to them but he's teaching me to trust that he will show me the path of life and he will show me the right way to walk and he will help me to do those little things teaching faithfulness to my children one of the things in sonship that we have learned is I don't own my children if I owned them then I would expect them to be perfect because I would have to be in control of what they did but as I give them up to him and say Lord hear these sinners that you've given me but thank you for them father as I give them up to him in their sinful and wretched state and in my sinful and wretched State he is taking them by His grace and power transforming them through his love through his love working through wall to me through our beginning to enjoy our children rather than being upset and frustrated and angry because they're not being the children we thought we had and he's making those children eventually servants for his glory so you and your place whatever portion God has given you he has faithfully given it to you because he knows exactly what you need to come through the place of entire yielded nests and submission to him he is feeding you with the bread of life that is Jesus and as we concentrate on Jesus and see more and more of his grace and his love we do see more and more of our sin as my mother said god forbid that we should see all of it because it's dreadful to see how wicked our hearts are and yet God is humbling us as we give him our wicked and sinful hearts and as we take in the bread of life believing that he is at my right hand I will not be afraid I not be shaken I will not give up hope because the Lord is able to do far more exceeding abundantly above all that we ask or think his faithfulness is from generation to generation thank you

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Published: Wed Aug 06 2014