[MUSIC PLAYING] Welcome to Gospel
Solutions for Families. I'm your host, Amy Iverson. The scriptures remind us over
and over to wait upon the Lord. Former Apostle Elder Neal
A. Maxwell put it this way: "Faith in God includes
faith in His timing." If you've ever wondered about
the Lord's timing in your life, you'll want to join us today. I'll be talking with Lisa Lund. In 2004, Lisa
married Russell Lund. Today, hanging on a sign in
Lisa's home is this quote: "Once in a while, right in the
middle of an ordinary life, love gives you a fairy tale." Lisa's fairy tale didn't
come the way she expected. Her fairy tale took faith
in the Lord's timing. So Lisa, you, growing
up, I feel like, had a very early dose of
thinking fairy tales happen. And a big part of that was
because of your parents-- Absolutely. --even the way they
joined the Church. Tell that story. My parents met at Bradley
University in Peoria, Illinois. And when they got
to the point where they were deciding that
they wanted to get married, my dad asked my mom, "Would you
investigate the Mormon Church with me?" And my mom said, "Yes,
I'd be happy to do that, as long as you would investigate
the Catholic church." That's fair. She had been raised
Catholic; he really hadn't been raised
with religion. But the story goes
back 10 years earlier, when my dad with his
family came from Illinois. And they went across
the United States just on a summer vacation. And my grandma really wanted
to see the Mormon Tabernacle Choir, so they stopped
at Temple Square. And as they were
finishing that tour, and they were leaving to
get back in their car, my grandma tells the
story that my dad, at 14, turned around and said, "I don't
know about the rest of you, but someday I'm going
to be a Mormon." Just from the Mormon
Tabernacle Choir. Yes, just from being on Temple
Square, the Spirit he felt. It was 10 years later
that that conversation happened with my parents
as to, would my mom investigate the Church. And my mom tells the story
that when the missionaries were talking to them,
instantly my dad knew he wanted to join the Church. My mom was a little
bit more hesitant. She calls herself more
of the stubborn side of the relationship. And it wasn't until they started
talking about families being together forever--she said
that's when the Spirit told her this was right. And they were married in 1959
in the Peoria, Illinois, church. And it was about three years
after that when my sister and I--Lynn was two and a
half; I would have been one and a half--that they came
to Utah and we were sealed as a family. And what's really
special about that is, your mom really must have
been close to the Spirit to have the fact
of forever families be the thing that touched
her, because of a tragedy that happened later. Right, it was. When I was nine, I had just
finished the third grade. And it had been
the best year ever, that when I finished
school, Mrs. Jimas, my third-grade teacher,
had written on my report card, "When this little girl
goes, a part of my heart goes with her." And I felt the
same way about her. It had been the best year. And we were planning our
annual summer vacation to go back to Illinois. We had moved to
Utah, and we were planning our summer vacation
to go back to Illinois. And my dad left for work on
June 1, and he never came home. He was killed in a car accident. And overnight our
world went from being, I would consider, perfect to
"What's going to happen now?" My mom had four little kids--a
10-year-old, a 9-year-old, a 6-year-old, and a 3-month-old. It had only been four
years before that that they had moved
from Illinois to Utah. My dad had been
recruited by ZCMI to come out and be in charge of
their advertising department. And now she was left
with four little kids, and the closest relative
was 1,500 miles away. But they had made the decision
to raise their family in Utah, and she stayed. She had the faith to
know this is where she wanted to raise her family. The morning after the accident,
she gathered the four of us together and told us
what had happened. And you think of someone,
34 years old--she had been a stay-at-home mom for 12 years,
and instantly her world was turned upside down. And she had the faith to
gather her little family and kneel down and
pray for the years we had been together as
a family and that we all needed to live our
lives that someday we can be reunited again. Well, she became your hero. Absolutely, absolutely. And now she's 81 years
old, this cute little short Italian woman. And she is. She is one of my
greatest heroes. So an eventful childhood
for your family. And as you grew
older, your mom played another role when we're
talking about fairy tales, because your sister became
engaged, your younger sister. My older sister. Oh, your older sister, OK. And your mom was a little
worried about money. So tell that wedding dress
story, because that is a hoot. Yes. Lynn and Kirby got engaged. And Lynn and I are just
14 months apart in age. And my mom told us that
she was on a tight budget. And she knew we would be
getting married close together, and so we needed to pick out
a wedding dress together. And so we went
shopping together, found a beautiful
wedding dress that Lynn wore when she got married. That was in 1981. I got married in 2004. [LAUGHS] So you
didn't wear the dress. So not only was the
dress not in style, but I couldn't have fit in it. So that's in your 20s, when
your sister gets married. And in my life, anyway,
that's when most of my friends were married. That's college time. Exactly. And it didn't happen
for you in your 20s. What were you
feeling at that time? You know what? There are choices
and consequences that come from those choices. And a big part of it is
because of choices I had made. And I think that I can look
back and say, "I wish." But my life was
a wonderful life. I've had wonderful
opportunities. I never looked at
it as, "Why me?" There were times--a dear friend
of mine called me up and told me that she was engaged. And I was so excited
for her, but I said, "Let me call you back." I hung up the
phone, and I cried. Not--I was so excited for her. But it was one more friend
getting married, and I wasn't. And I think part of it
was choices, consequences, and feeling like, "Have I
put the Atonement in place for myself?" And did you realize that
was the case in your 20s? Or has that come over time? I think it's come
over time, to realize that I needed to be able
to put the past behind me, that I had been
forgiven of things. But had I forgiven myself? Had I realized that the
Atonement was not just for everyone else, but for me? And so you felt like
that was a barrier to you and relationships. Absolutely. So in your 20s, you had a
little conflict of emotion, it sounds like. And then your 30s
came, and you still hadn't found the
love of your life. Right. And so in your 30s, how
did your mindset change? Or did it? Do you know what? A lot of it was "Maybe this
is not going to happen, and I can be happy anyway. I can move forward
with my life." I have two wonderful
sisters that let me be a second mom to them. And in fact, I have in my home a
cross-stitch that my sister did that says, "Few of us
will reach our potential without the mother who
bore us and the mothers who bear with us." And that's a quote by Sheri Dew. And the little
plaque at the bottom says, "To our second mom, Lisa,"
and then, "Love, Jared, Jordan, Abby, Justin, John,
Michaela, and Olivia." And they were my kids. And I just appreciate
so much my sisters, who let me be such a huge part
of their children's lives. I also decided to build a little
home in a family neighborhood. I had been attending
singles wards for years, and I thought, "If I'm going
to move into a neighborhood, I need to get involved
with the family ward." And that's scary when you're in
your early 30s, you're single, and you move into a ward
that's a lot of young families. But I went into that. Everyone was strangers. And when I did leave, 10
years later, I left family. I left-- Now, that's an amazing
attitude, because I think a lot of people, when they're single,
whatever the circumstances are--the Church focuses on
family, family, marriage a lot. Absolutely. And it could be very easy for
you to have sat in a corner in the back--I know people
who have done this--and keep to yourself. So what was it that made you
have that oomph to get out there and be involved? I think the first thing is,
from the time I was young, I love kids. I love children. I was the babysitter. And when my nieces and nephews
were born, I loved children. And so instead of
feeling sorry for myself that this was a part of
my life I did not have, I embraced that so
many wonderful mothers allowed me to be a big part
of their children's lives. Being in a neighborhood where
the families were young--two bishops served, that their wives
had three and four young kids. I sat next to them,
and those children became my children also. That's wonderful. I have a cute story
to tell, that Tyler, when he was about eight
years old, said to his mom, "Mom, do you think Lisa
would wait till I got home from my mission?" [CHUCKLES] And I was in my
mid-30s at the time. Tyler now is happily married
and such a wonderful young man. But there are so many
children out there now who have grown up that
I consider mine also. You mothered in your own way. Yes. So you are full of
joy and seem to have this wonderful, positive
attitude about everything. But was there ever
times--because I think a lot of people are in this situation
or similar ones--where you did feel alone or where you felt
maybe God had forgotten you a little bit? Yes. I felt like there were times,
more, I hadn't forgiven myself. So how could God love me? How could He want
the best for me? And I call them my
chocolate chip cookie days, where I would make a batch
of chocolate chip cookies and I would lay in bed, pull
the covers over my head, and just feel sorry for myself. But then, I'm a
half-glass-full person. I would wake up the next
day and count my blessings. And there are so many
things in my life that I feel like, if I would
have been married in my 20s, I would have missed out on. Not the thought of
being a mother myself. There is no one
who calls me Mom. But there are a lot of
children who call me Aunt Lisa. I have three beautiful
stepchildren who I adore. And there are six babies
out there that call me Nana. It worked out. I wouldn't have that if I would
have gotten married in my 20s. And you stayed very
active in the Church. I did. And your testimony remained
firm, it sounds like, through all of this time. My testimony did. That testimony of
the Atonement is what I have grown
into and learned to appreciate so much,
what the Atonement can do. And I think it was when I was
called to be the stake Relief Society president
in a family stake, that I remember our stake
president calling me. And I looked at him
and I said, "There are a thousand women in this
stake who are more qualified. I'm not married. I don't have children." My idea of a home-cooked
meal was shredded wheat with a SlimFast poured over it
because I couldn't keep milk fresh in my fridge long enough. But it was right. The timing was right. And it was the experience
that made me realize, "It's time to move on." So you getting
this major calling, which would be
daunting for anyone, I think--is that finally
when you were able to forgive yourself? I think so. I think it was, "If the
Lord trusts me with this, I need to trust myself that
it's time to move forward." And through this
whole time--I mean, through years and
years--were you open? Were you dating? Were you doing all
of those things? Oh, yes. And blind dates, I had
some amazing blind dates. But I think anyone who dates
for a long period of time can say, "Oh, dating was not
the greatest experience for me." I struggled with dating. In my profession, I
work with doctors, and I am confident with that. In my Church callings,
I was confident. When it came to
dating, I was a wreck. My poor sister and
my dear friend Jana would hear about how
I felt about dating. I was a wreck when
it came to dating. "Will he like me? Will I like him? Maybe I like him more
than he likes me. Maybe he likes me
more than I like him." It was just a challenge
for me to date. And so in those times,
you said you did have times where you felt
maybe a little deserted, your chocolate chip cookie days. Yes. But how did you stay close
enough to your Heavenly Father to--and did you think,
"He has a plan for me"? I mean, did you--were you
always able to keep that thought in your head? That He had a plan for me. But also, "Enjoy the life
experiences you're having, all of these
experiences"--serving in the callings I had,
opportunities at work that I was able to travel and meet
wonderful people in my job. My family was such a
wonderful support system. And even though 90 percent
of my friends were married, they included me in their lives. And I realized I had
a full, happy life. Well, it sounds like gratitude
was a huge part of your life and what made your happiness. Very much so. I think we could all probably
learn from that a little bit. So let's talk about when your
fairy tale started to happen. This started on one
of those blind dates. It did. OK. It did. A good friend of mine-- And you're in your 40s by
this point, is that right? Yes. Well, Russ and I met--it
was probably--yes, just before I turned 40. A dear friend of mine--and
if anybody thinks that their friendships from when they
were in junior high cannot have eternal consequences, my
dear friend Jana moved into the neighborhood and into
our ward in the eighth grade. And we were friends,
but as time went on, we became better friends. And she had two
beautiful children that I was a big
part of their lives. And her husband and
my husband, Russ, were serving in a
bishopric together. Your soon-to-be husband. Yes-- OK. --at the time. And Jana lined us up. And you were still willing-- Yes. --to do another blind date, OK. Yes. We were lined up, and
we went out twice. Well, Russ is the most
wonderful man in the world, but he is very quiet. And after the second
date, I told Jana, "He is way too quiet for me." And Russ told me,
after the second date, "If you want to go out again,
why don't you give me a call?" So maybe he wasn't quite
feeling it from you. Oh, OK. [CHUCKLES] The same thing is how it was. Two and a half years went by. Oh, so you did not call. I did not call. It was like, "OK, two dates. I'm done." He told me if I wanted to
go out again, "you call me." Jana was so upset with me, it
almost ruined our friendship, because she had a greater
perspective of the type of man Russ was than I did at the time. And it was shortly
after that second date, I was called to be the stake
Relief Society president. So you went through a
change in your life, in your own personal
thinking about yourself. Yes-- Yeah. --is what. But when President Smith called
me to be the Relief Society president, he said, "Do you
have any plans to move out of the stake?" And I somewhat sarcastically
said, "Only if some tall, dark, and handsome man comes and
sweeps me off my feet." Well, when you're one month
before your 40th birthday, you're not thinking
that's going to happen. So two and a half years later,
I worked with a woman, Beverly, and Jana, both at
different times, commented to me that Russ
Lund had spoken in church and what a great
job he had done. And I let Jana know,
"You know what? I feel bad because I did
not give him a fair chance." And Jana said, "Well, what
are you going to do about it?" And at that point, it
was like, "I don't know. What can I do?" So I sent Russ an email and
just told him that I felt bad. And in fact, I have
a copy of that email, and it just said, "I felt bad
that I never called you again. Would you want to
go out to dinner?" That was in October. Well, he played it really well. He tells me, "Usually,
any time would be fine. But I have vacations planned." So that was the first
part of October. It wasn't until the first week
of November--he kept me waiting an entire month--that
we went out. And from then on, we went out
the first time in November. We were engaged in January,
and we were married in the Manti Temple in April. Wow, what a great story. It was wonderful. So now, knowing all of that,
can you look back and think, "This was how it
was supposed to be"? Or do you think these
were your choices, and so that postponed you
finding this fairy tale? What is your perspective
now on your life? I think the Lord took
my hand and walked me through this experience. And I have thought
before, "What would my children have looked like? What is that experience
like of carrying a baby and having a child?" But I can't even go there, Amy,
because I think, "What would I have given up?" Look at what I have. Russ came as a package deal
with three beautiful children. And now we have
a daughter-in-law and a son-in-law and six
beautiful grandchildren and one on the way. I cannot imagine my
life without them. So if I tried to
think back, "What if?" I can't go there,
because that would mean I wouldn't have what I have now. And what I have now
is priceless to me. I think there are
a lot of people who are waiting for something
in their life to happen. It could be marriage. It could be children. It could be a job, whatever. And it's tough. You are the perfect example
of how we should be. But can you help those of
us who may not be there yet? But how do we trust in the
Lord's timing like you have? That's a good question. I think you have to look
at it as that our Heavenly Father knows us. And looking back now, 55 years,
how many times in my life that I believe the Lord
knew better than I did. And I think if we can have
an eternal perspective, not just this limited--what
I'm going through today, what I'm going through this week
or this year--but we have that eternal perspective like my mom
had when they started talking about families being
together forever. What we're going through
now is a small part of what Heavenly Father has
in store for each one of us. And we can all make
our happily ever after. Maybe it's going to be with
a husband and children. Maybe--in my mom's case, she
has still made her happily ever after for the last 47 years. She never lost perspective
of that eternal plan. But three months
after my dad died, she went back to school
to get her master's. And when my youngest
sister started school, she started teaching again. She was a wonderful teacher. And we even thought,
"Wow, when she retires, what is she going to do?" She spoils her grandchildren
and her great-grandchildren. That's her life, is her family. And I just think that
happiness is a choice. Whatever circumstances
we may be in, we have the ability
to choose to be happy. And finally, can you just talk
a little bit about how important putting the Atonement
to work in your life and having that personal
relationship with the Savior comes into play as we trust
in our Heavenly Father? The Atonement--Heavenly
Father knows us. He loves us. But we have to believe. We can't just say,
"Oh, yes, the Atonement is for everyone else." We have to believe,
"He did this for me," that what He went through
was for every one of us. And if we are
willing to do that, we can know that our
life may take a detour. As we have our GPS going,
recalculate--there are times we have to recalculate. And we cannot undo the past, but
we can make the future better and put that Atonement into play
and realize He wants the best for us. He's not there to punish us,
but choices have consequences. And if we put the
Atonement in our lives, we can have our
happily ever after. For my 50th birthday,
the greatest gift Russ gave me was a
picture I didn't even know had been taken. We were down at the Salt
Lake Temple at a wedding. It was a rainy day. He's holding an umbrella. I'm holding his arm,
and we are walking. And he gave that framed picture
to me on my 50th birthday. And to me, it
shows the two of us can get through
anything together. The storms of life,
whatever is put before us, we can get through together. And I think it's having
the Lord on our side and knowing we will
one day return to Him. My mom is 81, and
today would have been my dad's 82nd birthday. It's not going to
be that many years before there is going to be
an amazing reunion in heaven. And I hope it's a lot of years. I am certainly not
ready to let my mom go. But what an amazing reunion
there's going to be. And he's going to wrap
his arms around her and tell her what an
amazing job she did. She's my hero. I am so blessed to
have the life I have. Trusting in the Lord's
timing isn't easy. It can challenge
the faith of anyone. But in Lisa's life,
her trust allowed her to grow and be strengthened. That's not always the
course we would choose. But as the Lord
fully knows, it's the course that brings
the greatest satisfaction and that molds us into the
person He knows we can be and ultimately want to be. I'm Amy Iverson. Thanks for joining us. Join us next time for Gospel
Solutions for Families. [MUSIC PLAYING]
