TOP COMEDIANS on America's Got Talent! | Got Talent Global

This is Amazing, i wouldnt miss this for.... the w0rld lo lol lol lol lol squiggity wiggity woo Channels well I was gonna babysit two little girls I really like Disney Channel let's talk about that for a minute I am NOT a high school graduate I haven't even been to high school I don't have a driver's license I can't even sit in the front seat I'm still on safety scissors people are going to leave your beloved child the one who was carrying on your name to the next generation with me my only qualification to be a babysitter is that I used to be a baby crazy that's like saying hey you're sick a lot you want to be my doctor the host of a thank you everyone! I said I where here in it so I watch all my movies and TV shows with the subtitles on my favorite is when the subtitle says indistinct chatter oh thank god it's not just me then I those indistinct for everybody fate me and my partner actually recently broke up thank you thanks but got really quiet in here for a second or did it no it did I heard that here unite yeah now I know why it got quiet though right it's because I said partner as soon as somebody says partner and you don't know them well you can't even focus on the rest of the conversation you're just trying to solve the mystery mm-hmm partner huh you're all looking at me trying to crack the case right now I can feel it you're like well he's kinda got a list but that could be the hearing impaired don't know what to atribute that too no me and me and my girlfriend broke up to clear up that mystery thank you because I realized I was gay thank you let's finish can ask you cuz I actually do want to know are you gay I know really but but my boyfriend is no no he's not gay either we're just having a good time but hello hello my name is Derrick Santos you seem a little bit nervous are you not at all haha Derrick what do you do for a living well I'm a security guard a recent charity guard yep and what is it you guard a empty parking lot so I imagine having that job at the parking lot you've got to be great with the ladies of my career oh yeah you can't tell um do you have a girlfriend I do have a girlfriend she's here Oh No kidding yep somewhere out there and and and still looking for are you in a serious relationship yes well I like to think it is how many years have you been with it three years three whole years are you starting to think about perhaps proposing or I would like to I mean that's why I'm here I think I'd like to be able to propose to my girlfriend with more than just onion ring right in other words you don't have money for a ring so you're waiting chances of money now what about her parents are they disappointed in her decision to debut very much so is it the job or is it your just your demeanor I mean being a comedian I don't think they'd even that wouldn't it be great revenge if you could win the million dollars oh yeah and you're this funny guy and suddenly then the parents will be like oh yeah Derek's a great guy we always loved it wouldn't that be the Phantom oh yeah the well then I wouldn't speak to him anymore right how I do it this is your big moment stage is yours good luck awesome alright here we go so my parents are really weird my mom dresses up like my dad and my dad dresses up like my mom their transferrin oh yeah they're a real drag so I've been wearing diapers recently you guys I usually only wear diapers for two reasons number one and number two I'm going bananas is what I tell my bananas before I leave the house I'm going bananas so I'm glad you guys found that appealing I hate it when my friends ask me to do them a solid especially when I've been eating grapes all day alright guys I'm gonna leave you guys on a high note here so it's a huge misconception that guys are like dogs and women are like cats we have it backwards okay guys you're like cats you're aloof and emotionally unavailable women are exactly like dogs we're exactly like dogs like hey where you going where you we're I'm gonna wait right here I'm gonna wait right here I'm gonna wait right here I'm gonna wait right here I'm gonna wait right here I'm gonna shoes see guys you're like cats you're like oh you're home okay so this is what's gonna happen you're gonna feed me then I'm gonna stare with the window at nothing then I'm gonna pass on the bathroom deal we have a deal hope women are like dogs we clean up after ourselves right ladies you ever seen a dog vomit eats it right back up usually does in a private eats enough no evidence you don't even know what's happened guys you're like cats you'll just puke anywhere and make a huge scene about it and then you're like oh my god can you clean that up it's so gross I don't want to touch it here comes a dog I got it I got it I totally got it women are like dogs we need to be groomed shampoo condition blow dry fluffy dry cancer like what I'm dirty lender let's go what an honor to be auditioning in front of the best judges in the world here at America's Got Talent but I have to say though it took me such a long time to get here in front of you when I first got here and saw the line of people waiting to audition my father said to me wow this is so much longer than I expected it to be the last time I heard those words I was in my doctor getting a physical I have some exciting news I just had my first date a girl from my class came over to my house the other day and as her mother was leaving she told my friend remember you're allergic to nuts all I can think all I can think to myself was well there go my plans for the afternoon for a long time I wanted to be a circus performer and my parents even sent me to circus camp I learned how to juggle how to ride a unicycle and I came home from camp one day telling my mother I wanted to learn a new trick I wanted to learn how to be a sword swallower she said no way we'll let you do other things we're not gonna let you be a sword swallower so I was upset and I want to talk to my dad about this he said I'm not surprised your mother hasn't been interested in sword swallowing since we got engaged was in the circus hello my name is Leo littell I am 15 years old and I'm single I've been single let's see here pretty much my whole life pretty sure it's because I'm unemployed I look at home with my parents and I don't have a car these are all big red flags it's why I don't get much attention on match.com I do however have a lot of success on tinder where I am a buff 28 year old Georgetown medical student with a portion a trust fund now I'm a teenager so I'm in that awkward phase of life I'm kind of a mutant creature part adult part child but I look back on the early years of childhood fondly you know those good old memories like when you get in the van and turns out the man doesn't have any candy of course nowadays candy won't cut it we're in the 21st century you need something like free Wi-Fi doubt the ante that's really all the kid wants anymore speaking from experience and I want to thank my mom and dad for being so supportive of my comedy my mom helps me book gigs and my dad helps me write my material so I like to think I'm pretty far along in the entertainment industry because I've got two things that a lot of people strive to have I have a Jewish writer and my agent is a girl I used to sleep with Wow what's your name and where you from my name is Scott heuerman and I'm from like I don't even know them and I'm from Lexington Kentucky what are you gonna be doing for us today I'm going to be doing comedy do you always dress up when you do your comedy um usually I just dressed up if I'm like at home cooking or cleaning but are you making a living with comedy no I'm a pizza delivery boy you deliver pizza do you do dress like this no i'm doing pizza like twelve inches of snow in kentucky but i key i have the pink eyebrow always so I deliver pizza with a little bit of something but not a lot are you single because Nick's newly single I think we should go on a date look at his shoes they're sparkly as mine look go for it I can't wait okay well hello everybody so a little bit about me I'm adopted which basically means my original family said no thank you my sister's actually adopted too my mom can't have kids because she's emotionally unavailable for committed relationships my sister growing up was the golden child like when she graduated high school my parents threw her a huge party and I got nothing when I dropped out they're always like Scott why can't you be more like your sister I'm like how's this but actually I haven't always looked like this true story starring me I used to be 300 pounds can you believe it yes Malby yes Heidi can you believe I believe you I miss being fat you know I miss being able to wear a t-shirt and sweatpants to formal events and people being totally fine with that you know okay you know was really jealous of growing up besides skinny people and kids whose parents kept them too the Girl Scouts I was in the Boy Scouts my mom signed me up for Boy Scouts but while the Girl Scouts were sipping soda over at the Holiday Inn Express watching The Little Mermaid for their marine time under the sea funtime patch I was in the middle of buck-toothed Kentucky trying to survive off testosterone and trail mix talking about power up boys we brought you out here to teach you survival skills oh really why don't you teach me how to do my taxes why would you teach me how to deal with a breakup text okay down I'm okay with with with my with my voice but I still struggle with some some things like like like I have the hardest time at a drive-thru you know gets busy cuz you got you got to say that sale order or vast and you're doing it and you're talking through an intercom like I don't know why I I would work there oh I wouldn't I wanna get you to wear a bib bib Asda start to use me mm-hmm my voice is as the voice of their GPS it's like it in in one-one thousand dollars a thousand feet make make make make a u-turn Jurgis does does the name nation is is either I have had ahead of you on the are on her own on the right or it with me review you told you you you turn yes you sure he's the guy I believe that you get in turn and then anything and to do positive that's why I'm here but I've come along some to some people who don't think they think that like I did a shirt show one time where where a guys do a double it's like hey you you you can't just make fun disabilities just cuz you you have have woman house house they I was like well did I start there then they thank you guys so so so much the while the crowd is definitely with you drew you know it is such a hard thing to get up on a stage when you've got everything going for you and everything's clear and to go up there with your situation and to pull this off and to get the crowd with you is almost impossible so I along with the audience applaud you for that really awesome what I love about you is you've taken your situation and like you said you've turned it into a positive I was laughing even more the fact that you were laughing at your own joke how he would you think all right here's what I thought I know you're here to make people laugh but I can't tell you how emotional you make me because comedy usually comes from a dark place a lot of comedians you know are depressed I am personally in my life of use laughter to try to gain some happiness what you did is you looked for the light at the end of the darkness and that light is your comedy and I'm telling you I haven't been moved by an act like this up until this moment and because of you and because of this moment I want to do something very special something I haven't had a chance to do and I'd like to do this for everyone it doesn't know what's going on Howie Mandel just hit the coat and buzzer and you my friend are going straight to the live shows at Radio City how's it feel oh good good Oh uhit's a golden buzzer you are worth a million dollars I want to see you at Radio City Music Hall I'm gonna see you at Radio City Music Hall

Channel: Got Talent Global

Views: 18,461,372

Rating: 4.8914776 out of 5

Keywords: Got Talent (TV Program), got talent global, audition, simon cowell, performance, top comedian's on america's got talent, best comedians on america's got talent, comedians on got talent, comedians on america's got talent, funniest comedians on got talent, funniest comedians, comedians, drew lynch america's got talent, kid comedians, golden buzzer comedians, golden buzzers on got talent, hilarious comedians, best comedians, kid comedians on got talent

Id: p6mQ59_wk0k

Length: 20min 22sec (1222 seconds)

Published: Fri Apr 28 2017