Tony Robbins: Stop Thinking That I Can't Do It ( Tony Robbins Psychology )

About digging inside and figuring out what are the things that control every thought every feeling and emotion of your life if you ever wanted to make a change you wanted to lose weight you wanted to transform your relationship you wanted to make a shift financially in your life and you find yourself making progress but pulling back or never really even getting started just being excited about it for a while talking about it but not really following through then there's something there something that affects the way you follow through something affects the quality of your life and I'm here to tell you there's two things that control everything in your life every thought every feeling every emotion every action you have in your life what you're wearing today whether you're gonna turn this off within a few minutes or whether you're gonna stick with me here for two or three minutes is all controlled by two things your beliefs and your values whatever you believe if you think life is just a waste of time doesn't matter what you do or you know you're big-boned then obviously you're not gonna go for it you're not gonna try to lose weight you're not gonna go push for that next level of your career or your finances or or your relationship or anything else beliefs control us but so do our values some people you know value just kicking back some people value making it happen some people value their family the most some people are value love but you know the real challenge is we have values in conflict when you really want to make a difference in the world or you really want to do well for your family or you really want to do well financially but simultaneously you know you don't want upset anybody do you want to be totally honest you want to make everybody happy when we have conflicts between what we want and what we think we can have or you know you have a goal of what you really want to make happen but then you have this other belief inside that says damn stuff never does work those inner conflicts are what keep people from using all of their energy it's kind of like taking two steps forward and three steps back people who succeed in any situation have a pattern of what they do to succeed and it doesn't matter whether that person is succeeding at a business context or a relationship context doesn't matter what the environment is the fundamental lessons or cause for succeeding are very very basic so if we're looking for the ultimate success for me the very first thing we have is you have to know what you want which we call know your outcome you're gonna succeed at anything it's hard to succeed hard to hit a target when you don't know what it is and as simplistic as this sounds dunno if you most people really know what they want what do you think yes or no at least not consciously they don't right and so it's gonna be very very difficult to achieve what you want waited to having to find it but this is going to become a question we're gonna want you to ask yourself a lot what is my outcome in this situation I even have a time management system that I developed it's really a life management system which we call opa because the first Oh sounds for what's my outcome cuz you can come up with a question like what should I do and you're gonna end up with a long list but as you do all these things what'll happen is you can cross something off your list and still be unfulfilled and not really achieve anything that matters so you say what's my outcome first then you begin to decide what you need to do to get the outcome so in this case we want to say what's your outcome you want to make it a habit ask this question i watch your the middle of a conversation stop yourself if it seems to going nowhere and say what's my hell come here I want to connect you don't want to influence this person you want to learn something what's your outcome for example how many of you have ever been caught up in an argument and you even forgot what you're arguing for but you knew you had to win how many been there say I okay if in the middle of that argument you would ask yourself the question what's my outcome here I guarantee your brain would say well my outcomes like the fight my outcomes to resolve this and if you get clear on what your real target is your behavior will change automatically so very very few people know what they want and the more you clear you can get about what you want the more you can really achieve so my right underneath this is the subset of number one still number one just like clarity is power clarity is power but more clear you can become but what it is you really want no more power you're gonna have cuz your brain is like a servomechanism in a a bomb as an example they sent a missile out it has a servomechanism it knows what the target is and when the target moves it follows it well your brain is very similar when you decide exactly what as you want you start picking up information that you never would have picked up before consciously for example have you ever bought a particular car maybe or maybe a certain outfit and then all of a sudden you see that car or outfit everywhere how many got that experience ai well what's that car outfit already around you all the time yeah but you didn't notice it because there's a portion of your brain that it was responsible for one thing and that is screening out 99% of what you see here and feeling life because if you were to notice everything that's going on in this room right now you go stark raving mad but most of you don't you put attention to a small number of things if you could right now notice what millions of things you can notice my voice you could listen to what I'm saying you can notice what's going on the background the screens you could hear the air conditioning you can smell your neighbor off to all that jumping up and down notice that right you can feel it maybe a little sweat trickling across your chest or whatever was going on after all that jumping up and down you could feel the blood maybe vibrating or circulating through your left eardrum but you don't think about those things so maybe I mentioned them or something triggers it so this part of our brain that's responsible for deleting most of our thoughts and most of the things that are going on around us that part of our brain when you know when it knows what you want it makes you notice those things you suddenly see that car because it's important it's called the reticular activating system you don't have to write all the down for sure that's called Ras the reticular activating system tells your brain what to pay attention to so when you say that this is what I really want now anything that relates to that that you would have noticed before will start popping up into your focus and a lot of times people say it's amazing I decided this and it was kind of you know synchronicity these things started popping up all these things were probably around you before but you never notice them because you haven't decided your outcome now when you know your outcome you're had a 95% of the population but that's not enough ii think i don't know is a lot of times you know your outcome but you lose your drive you know you want something but you forget the most important thing which is know why you want it know why you want it you gotta know the purpose in our opa training system when people are managing their lives we have them ask what's my outcome and then why do i want this because any person's success so really successful knows exactly what they want they know why the reason i don't know why is remember I said yesterday reasons come first answers come second get enough reasons you can get a big enough why you can figure out hide of you about anything but you got to have purpose because purpose provides drive now if you know what you want and you know why you're lightyears ahead of most the population but you gotta go the step that most people seem to avoid and that is you got to take massive what that's right and a key word there is massive massive action can be a cure-all when you know what you're after and you know why you want it cuz we know what you're after when you take a CH and you won't just be expending energy you'll be moving yourself in a direction towards something you really really want and by the way last night we call taking massive action personal what power which means ability to take action and what stops people from taking action primarily what fear and the way you get over that fear is what do you think is the number one fear most people have failure and the reason is they feel if they fail they won't be loved they'll be rejected they'll be hurt they'll be judged so what they really are afraid of is losing love and they think that this rejection or I should say this failure will lead to that rejection or loss of love the truth of matter is you can't fail unless you don't try you try something doesn't work you just learn from it and that'll make you better the next time you go about it now if you know your outcome know why you want and take massive action you're now in the most small percentile of people on the planet so what's the next step though well you can take a lot of action and get caught up in a pattern like become so determinate you became what tunnel vision like I know this is gonna work and so you keep running east looking for a sunset with total certainty and a lot of belief high-standard still doesn't work so what you have to be able to do to succeed you don't get caught up in some old pattern is you got to know what you're getting know what you are know what you are getting the word we use for this is for sure is we call it sensory acuity sensory acuity is the idea that you want to become acutely sensitive to whether what you're doing is working or not you don't want to just say okay I know what I want to know I don't want it I'm just gonna make it happen this is how I'm gonna do it you keep hammering and hammering and hammering it doing something that doesn't work and people do this all the time right do the same thing over and over again expecting a different result that's called insanity you can't do the same thing again and again expect a different result when you can see it it doesn't get the result but we get caught up in our patterns so we want to get really sensitized acutely sensitized sensory acuity to whether what we're doing is working or not and by the way sensory acuity is really the measure of a person's intelligence what I mean by that is how do we measure intelligence intelligence is a measure of the number and quality of distinctions you have in a given situation like for example if you talk to Eskimos that's actually not the politically correct term anymore I guess it's in a way you talk to it in a way what we formally called Eskimos you'd find out that in a way have more than a dozen words for the word snow more than a dozen now I'm from Southern California guess how many words I have for snow one I don't see any of it it's called smell baby right but they got to know what kind of snow they're gonna make more refined distinctions to be effective in the world to get their outcomes they don't know what kind of snow you can build an igloo out of what kind of snow you can take your dogs through what kind of snow you can eat alright what kind of snow you're gonna fall through so who has more intelligence who has more power in that snowy environment the Eskimo Army which one Eskimo because they have more sensory acuity they have more refined distinctions about what each of these elements mean versi to see it as snow now if you took that Eskimo and you snuck in my car in Los Angeles then we fried out maybe I have a little more intelligence because he might try to steer the thing using the rearview mirror right he just doesn't know so since he doesn't have that acuity he doesn't have those distinctions you new terribly well there see some people I can hold this up and I can say what is this and they say well that's a cylinder other people say no no that's a blue white black cylinder someone else says no no that's a blue color marker a few people say no no now such as the blue color marker that is a pilot super color bright and white color marker and if you get in your clothes they don't never come out now which through those people has more power 1 2 3 or 4 4 because they have the largest number of distinction so now if you know your outcome you know why you want it you got your purpose you got your drive you got your a and oppa this is outcome purpose action you know the mass of action you're taking action and you notice what's working what happens if you notice it's not working you're taking action but it's not getting you closer to outcome what's the obvious fist step but this step is change your approach change your approach if what you're doing your cutie says is not working change it now what if you change approaching that's still not working then what would you do what would you do come on what would you do change again keep yourself in a peak state sit up in your chair some of you've gone back into that deep hypnotic state of learning I can see and what have you tried that it didn't work they don't want you to do what does that doesn't work what do you do and what if that doesn't work what do you do what if that doesn't work what do you do what is up there all that and still doesn't work what do you do and what have you tried out and it doesn't work how many times until you find out what works do not say to yourself I've tried everything that's bull if you tried everything you have what you want why I've tried everything but I've tried millions of things millions numbers them name them well maybe tens of thousands tens of thousands name a thousand well maybe 100 name on it well maybe I did these two things over and over again that don't work okay but when we start saying I've tried everything we tend to incant that don't wait we make it an incantation then we believe it and since we think we've tried everything we just give up it's garbage not true hey let me ask you a question how long would you give your average baby to learn how to walk you know before you shut them off and didn't let them try anymore yeah what are you crazy my kids gonna keep trying until he or she walks ah magic formula you know what almost every the whole world walks okay so this is the ultimate success form that comes down to knowing what you want why you want to take a massive action know what's working and simply changing your approach until you get it that's it anyone who succeeds does this they may not call it Robins ultimate success formula but I guarantee they did it on a corny example Thomas Edison these lights in here did this guy know his outcome yes or no yes or no he was absolutely clear without knowing the outcome you couldn't have built that in million years it didn't exist before he had to decide he want to create this result without the use of candles did he know why you want to do it you you read his writings this man had a sense of incredible purpose and drive did he take massive action yes or no oh yes tens of thousands of experiments did he noticed when it wasn't working and learned from it yes or no did he keep changing his approach that's why right now in this room we don't smell camel white right now if you know the old story of him was written about him early in his early days he's got his best friend with them he's doing this experiment and as he's doing he creates a small explosion which shakes the room scares both of them very very severely and then at the end of that he gets up and his friend is totally shaken freaked out he pulls out his journal he starts writing and his buddy says to him what's the matter of you would saying almost killed us so you gonna wait you have 10,000 failures for you give this stupid idea up and Addison's response to him was I didn't have a failure there he goes after 9090 99th failure he said no it's not he said I discovered the 9,999 way not to Amenti electrolyte bulb but I did discover how to create a small explosion which may be useful in the future somewhere else interesting right because he understood what this process was he did Bruce Springsteen use this do you think you just want went out used his gravelly voice and said they may be born to USA and everybody went yeah you're it man that what happened know what really happened if you know his story was that all the agents of evil went to try and book was said just playing the guitar and keep your mouth shut your voice is gross sounding it's gravelly it's irritating no one's gonna like the stuff keep your mouth shut and play the guitar but he knew what he wanted he had all the drive you can imagine knew why he wanted took massive action kept changing his approach till he got what he wanted how about Sly Stallone Sylvester Stallone rocky rocky story is this even right but slices to slice a good friend of mine and when I first met him years ago he's listened to my tapes and stuff and invited me over for dinner we started talking and I said you know I've heard your story from other people but I really wanted to hear from the horse's mouth I don't know how much is mythology and urban myth and how much is true so he told me the whole story said the essence of it though was he said he knew his whole life well you want to do she's very very young he wanted to be in the movie business period I mean not just TV movies and yes he said why was for him it was a chance to have people not only escape but to inspire people and by the way that drive is what made most of his movies inspired people to what they're capable of to overcome unbelievable obstacles because in his own life he felt like he did that when he was born he's pulled out by the forceps that's why he looked the way he did it's why he talked the way he did and he said so I really want to do that and he said I know why I want to do it I wasn't one to settle for anything else and he said what happened was I went out to try and get jobs and it's not like I went her dream they want you you're a star it didn't work out real well they looked at me and said hey you're stupid look and do something else you know cos there's no place for you in that stuff you're never gonna be a star in the movies you're insane no one's gonna wanna listen if somebody looks Bobi and talks out of the side of their mouth right and got no after no after no after now he said I was thrown out more fit more than 1,500 times of agents offices in New York I said they're only 15 minutes in New York I said I know I've been on five six seven eight nine times he said number one guy went in there and I got in there at four o'clock and he wouldn't see me so I stayed there and I would not leave I stayed overnight they came back that's morning I'm still sitting there he said that's why I got my first job the guy said plant come in here and he sat down and he went through this and he gave my first movie I said I really have thought Rocky was worse mom he said now this other movie I'd never heard of it he said I said well what character your place if I was in it for about 20 seconds I was a thug and somebody beat up he said because they made me feel like you know some of the people hate your guts you getting beat up will be a good thing and he did like three movies like that never got anything kept going out rejection rejection rejection so finally realized it wasn't working so he changed his approach he said I was starving by the way he said I couldn't pay for even they have heat in my apartment my wife was screaming at me everyday to go get a job I said well why didn't you he said because I knew that if I got a job he said I'd get seduced back and I'd lose my hunger he said I knew the only way I could do this is if it was the only choice have I burned all other bridges because if I did a normal job pretty soon I'd be caught up in that River that's tough when I feel okay about my life and I feel like my dream would just gradually disappear he said I wanted to keep that hunger that hunger was the only thing I thought was my advantage he said my wife didn't understand that at all he said we'd have these vicious fights he said it was freezing so I was broke we had no money and he said so I finally went to the public library one day because it was warm said I want to read anything since I went in New York Public Library's I was hanging out there and I sat it on this chair and somebody left a book there and he said I looked at this book and over the poems of Edgar Allan stories of Edgar Allan Poe and he said so I started reading it he said I got totally in the other girl and he said I know everything about it he goes on for another 20 minutes telling me about Aaron Paul he knows everything how he died what it was about what really happened I said well would have told you for you he said Poe got me out of myself he got me to think about how I could touch other people and not worry about myself so much and he said it made me decide to become a writer I said I'm just imagine rocky the writer right and he said so I tried to write a bunch of screenplays nothing worked nothing to work I were totally broke he said I didn't even have 50 bucks he said and finally he said I sold a script it was called paradise alleys as a movie I made many years later but I sold it he said I sold it for a hundred bucks he said a hundred bucks was a ton of money man I was so thrilled I thought I'm on my way but it never led to anything he said so finally he said I kept going and going going he said finally we were so broke he said I hocked my wife's jewelry he's a Tony there's some things in life you should never do he said that was basically the end of our relationship she hated my guts so much he said now we are so broke we had nothing to food no money and he said the one thing I love most in the world was my dog he said I love my dog because he gave me unconditional love unlike my wife and he said so what happened was though we were so broke that's a survive I couldn't even feed my dog so I went to a liquor store so it was the lowest day of my life and I stood outside the liquor store trying to sell my dog to strangers so I tried to sell my dog for 50 bucks and he said this father there's one guy negotiating with me and bought my dog for me my best friend and ours for $25 he said I walked away from there and I cried he says the worst thing that ever happened my life he's a two weeks later I'm watching a fight between Muhammad Ali and Wepner this white guy that's getting bludgeoned but just keeps on comin even though I get the hell beat out of it and he said I got an idea he said as soon as the fight ended I started writing he said I wrote for 20 straight hours I did not sleep I wrote the entire movie in 20 hours straight right then saw the fight wrote the movie whole thing done he said I was shaking at the end I was so excited so I really knew man I knew what I wanted I knew why I wanted he said just like it sees that the formula he said that I said man I took the action now it's time to deliver and so he said I went out started trying cell at the agents and they all would read it and they'd say you know this is predictable this is stupid this is sappy he said I wrote down all the things they said and I read them the night of the Oscars when we won yes and it's really good the greatest revenge is massive success they said so what happened was he said I kept going trying to sell it trying to sell it nobody going I'm broke I'm starving he said finally I meet these guys they read it and they believed in the script and they love it and they offer me a hundred and twenty five thousand dollars for my script I said oh my god you must've been out of your mind he said I was I said just one thing though guys you got a deal based on one thing they said what's that he said I got to star in it they went what are you talking about you're a writer so no I'm an actor no no no you're a writer so no no I'm an actor that is my story and I am rocky said I gotta play it you know I got to be the head person I got me the starring role this there's no way we're not gonna pay out of $25,000 take some no-name and stick you in that throw our money away we need a star you know and they wanted to have Ryan O'Neal play Rocky give you a picture can you imagine that's who they picked right and so he said no way Ryan O'Neal's a rocky I'm Rocky we do this whole thing right they finally he said they said well take it or leave it he said I left the room I said if that's what you believe you don't get my script he left here's the man with no money none totally broke offered $125,000 more money seen his life timing walked away because he knew his real what news real-life and why wanted he was committed to it so he said they called him a few weeks later and they came brought it back and they offered him a quarter of a million dollars not the star in his own movie he turned it down $250,000 they came back their final offers three hundred and twenty five thousand dollars they wanted this thing he said not without me and they said no they finally compromised and they gave him thirty five thousand dollars and points in the movie because they said if this is gonna happen then you're gonna take the risk with us and the bottom line is we don't think it'll work but at least we'll spend a bunch of money on you and then they only spent a million dollars to make Rocky and it grows 200 million dollars at the time I am it was done pretty well but what's interesting about this is here's he I said what you do I mean even 35,000 it's not a quarter of a million I was a lot of money when you don't have 25 bucks I said what's the first thing you did I figure you went out and partied it's not me said I went to that liquor store for three straight days and hope that the man had my dog frequented the store he's because I want to buy back my dog that was so cool all right that was really cool so what happened he said third day I was there this guy walks by and I see him and I can't believe it and there's my dog and I looked at I said sir remember me and he said it's been about a month and a half I found this it all come about he said member me and I'm the guy who sold you the dog yeah yeah I love the dog he's so look he said I was so broke I was starving he's my best friend I'm sure you love him too but I gotta happen black please I beg of you he said I'll pay you $100 to the dog I know you baby 25 they'll give you a hundred the man said absolutely not no way it's my dog now you can't buy him back right and so I said you know Tony you know he'd say no your outcome I said yeah he said I knew it he said I kept changed my approach so I went five hundred dollars for the dog you guys said absolutely no way he said $1,000 for my dog guy said no amount of money in the Earth's never gonna get this dog for you what you knew he said I knew my outcome right because he listened his name's Kip to him he says I take massive action he said I got my dog I just kept changing my approach so I got it as a word of caution $15,000 and a part in Rocky the guys in Rocky you know that dog in Rocky Butkus that slice real dog right that's the dog you bought him back so he put his dog in the movie and he put the guy in the movie a paid 15 grand while he had 35,000 I'm not pretty cool pretty awesome so there's always a way if you're committed just gotta keep changing your approach

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Id: YPwA_GbEIGY

Length: 25min 16sec (1516 seconds)

Published: Wed Aug 30 2017