Have you ever noticed that your town sucks
at snow removal? Now, some of you are probably thinking to
yourself, “whoa, wait a minute, this guy doesn’t know where I live, how did he manage
to make that spot on observation?” On the other hand, others of you are thinking
“actually it doesn’t snow at all where I live,” and to you I say a very sincere
shut up, this video isn’t about you. Anyways, the reason I nailed this observation
for some of you is that, spoiler alert, pretty much everywhere sucks at snow removal. Or put another way: snow removal is actually
a lot harder than it might seem. Let’s start with the basics, because even
those aren’t as basic as you might imagine. The most popular vehicle for plowing snow,
the snowplow, is the backbone of most cities’ operations, whether you’re strolling through
New York City or Vail, Colorado. Generally, they’re assigned specific routes,
beginning with the most crucial roadways that connect to hospitals, emergency services,
and schools, and plow back-and-forth until they’re devoid of snow—because most snow
plows don’t reach the blacktop on first pass, to prevent the scooper from colliding
with any debris or potholes, which could damage the plow. And they always move snow to the right side
of a road at this angle, unless you’re in a few of those fictional non-America places,
so they don’t block one-way intersections and disperse the snow to the right shoulder,
which ensures that drivers know where the road ends in whiteout conditions, and makes
sure that huge snow drifts don’t pile up. But they can only travel between 25 to 35
miles per hour, or 40 to 55 kilometers per hour—increasing snowplow speeds beyond these
limits doesn’t actually increase the rate at which snow is removed; it only increases
the rate at which pedestrians’ lives are removed. And while this setup might seem “dumb”
or “not very rock n’ roll” to the untrained eye, it’s actually the best solution to
snow route planning engineered over decades. Specifically, this slow-and-steady method
ensures that the most important routes to drivers in a storm are the safest first, which
is why all those news anchors tell you not to go outside in a blizzard unless it’s
absolutely necessary. In New York City, this setup means snowplows
have to make several passes on 19,000 miles, or 30,000 kilometers of roadways—three quarters
of the Earth’s circumference—after a snowstorm, which takes days. In fact, the city spent $12 million per fallen
inch of snow plowed in 2020 alone. In mountain towns like Vail, Colorado, snow
plows also have to consider the added challenge of elevation. Vail Pass, one of Interstate 70’s hairiest
stretches, boasts a 3.8 percent grade, which means that the slow plows—which is the mean
nickname I just came up with for snow plows—have to go even slower. And to make matters even more complicated,
the altitude in towns like Vail make it more likely that snow and ice re-freeze overnight,
which means plows run 24/7 until a storm passes. But that’s just snowplows. Much like British food, snow removal can be
significantly aided by adding lots of salt. Most cities use salt to lower the freezing
point of water, which prevents ice from forming in the first place, or breaks it up depending
on when you apply it. According to Vox, 26 states dumped 17 million
tons of salt on the roads in 2013. For scale, 17 million tons of salt is roughly
the sodium content of one and a half servings of Guy Fieri’s Trashcan Nachos. To make a roadway drivable, multiple trucks’
worth of salt have to be applied. But as Guy Fieri’s trashcan nachos teach
us, too much salt has drawbacks. Using insane amounts of salt corrodes cars
and bridges, and when massive quantities of salt enter the ecosystem, they can kill a
lot of living things and get into our water supply. Plus, our salt supply is running out, which
means both large cities and remote mountain towns won’t be able to depend on their tried-and-true
ice breaker for much longer. To lower the labor and resource costs of snow
removal in their pedestrian villages, Vail, Colorado actually invested in heated streets
for Vail Village and Lionshead, which actually works out as better for the environment, and
tried applying beet juice to the other roads, which isn’t as effective, but is biodegradable
and has the added benefit of making it look like someone bled all over the snow. Given the inherent limitations of snow plows
and salt, some cities have tried to innovate, which has led to some… well, let’s call
them interesting solutions. Because of how many streets it has to plow
and how much snow can accumulate, New York City invested in giant hot tubs jerry-rigged
to dump trucks. Instead of letting the local children have
a magical winter morning sledding in the streets, the city brings out industrial-size melters
that can turn 240 gallons or 900 liters of snow per minute into slightly less magical
water, which then gets sent to one of the city’s not at all magical wastewater treatment
plants. Surprisingly, this is the best solution to
get rid of snowdrifts and doesn’t require the hot tubs to be at hot tub-level temperatures:
the snow will melt in water with a temperature of 40 degrees Fahrenheit, or about 5 degrees
celsius. But this entire process of plowing, salting,
and hauling doesn’t even cover sidewalks or driveways, because in most towns or cities,
they require tenants, landlords, and residents to clear ice and snow from them, which is
great for ambulance chasers, but not great for everyone else. The good news is, if you break your ribs walking
to work, you can sue your neighbor! So, uh, in conclusion, to get rid of snow,
cities have to plow roads with giant, expensive snow plows that can only drive very slowly,
or they can cover the roads in corrosive salt that is also running out, or they can attach
a giant hot tub to a dump truck and see where the day takes them. And while it often doesn’t work very well,
just remember it’s all done with the noble intention of robbing you of a snow day. Whether you’re reading the weather forecast,
or the opinion section, or the current happenings of Harry and Meghan, you probably read a lot
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