The Waitress at The Waffle House Miami Comedy Special #85southshow

[Applause] very myself doing in the field and where are my my presented there make some noise Miami y'all got some beautiful ladies out here let me tell you you guys are in for a great show tonight how many y'all watch the show on YouTube [Music] tail here but when you hear you just might be part of the [ __ ] show y'all gonna get this show started say hello Jim we're Miami tonight with dish sold out the James a old night dinner Miami give it up for yourself we got three of the hottest comedians in the country right now and they go all be on this stage here tonight in Miami you guys are witnessing greatness tonight get your phones out so you can show somebody no MTV wildin out he's funny too his style is impeccable these the coldest romantic comedy he's gone away from positive DC but Miami he goes beyond this here tonight make them know we got to go [Music] the next member of 85 downtown heat money as hell we call a loose legs [Music] you see the money up to be wildin out Duke xenomorph eet you see them on vh1 hip-hop squares Tuesday two-minute movie how high to do see them in the movie you see them in the movie our mom's Christmas in Miami he goes beyond this day dear tonight he came all the way from the West [Music] the third member of the a-team ice out no he needs no introduction but I'm giving one anyway he goes by the name of the sensei he is the creator movement [ __ ] me and don't cheat Suzie neva MTV Wilin out and you go see him on these days you're tonight he's all the way from Atlanta by way of Mississippi [Music] I need you to turn it up a little bit me you ready to get 85 now show the Buddhist by the two keys of company [Music] [Music] [Applause] [Applause] [Applause] we in Miami ain't no joke salute all the [ __ ] in the crowded cell door yeah time like this is with the family [Music] [Music] [Applause] [Music] everybody still dope [ __ ] earlier today a bigger chip did overflow puts him - Oh check it on the boat I'll tap which I know how we check it on the phone combining my launcher oh [ __ ] nobody good Monday launch day yeah [Applause] sit down sit down oh we've got to talk good [ __ ] oh yes [Music] now we in this [ __ ] we need energy what's up well you look at this crowd we got the white folks gangsters and the thugs all in one building we got Takashi 6-9 in this [ __ ] this [ __ ] trippin all right now what's not to cash in they don't let you free tell you 2007 it's a while no snitching that Joe [ __ ] done like like you the Gator clerk mega you like the cage open this [ __ ] - you want to play a game that real white man right here what's that way man y'all do it by there Connor Bret and what made you put the pink on the tip right there why you do that your ex did it that's why you love that [ __ ] she gone so why you want to change it because he liked that [ __ ] she ain't me what she what are you stupid in here you land like it was like it we broke up are we still together oh I see you cookie you some love there are some lovely [Applause] [Music] big girl she smelled like mothballs at Bed Bath & Beyond Lee she tried well you still try to cover the bother well y'all get some salsa music from hmm big girls need love big girls need love Oh big girls need love see the line she cooks sitting down she got a pot of greens on the stove right now y'all stop for real hey I'm so real [ __ ] when y'all played there all the Spanish people in like okay I like these guys okay verse well we at Miami man this is the [ __ ] town how y'all feelin Miami are good tonight huh we really in South America I don't give a [ __ ] with nobody thing yes a lot I was it I wanted to look better today to get a sandwich oh wait let me get a hand the cheese public said you are yeah ball I was like I don't let me try I've never had yeah I won't I was the mode that's it better than a ham this [ __ ] delicious what is those that what is those that nobody got so [Applause] let's do it up [Applause] what for the patient when they got to put so good you'll stop eating pork I'm caught with ozone why seem as though it's still I think when I you look a photo week he told me to look seeing the back saying suck her [ __ ] wrong that way that's exactly what it sounds like when they say fast now yeah suck pase pase now boule that sound like suck my puss it may be later I'll owe you two when she working at Waffle House she still got a tag on you record the one who set us up she do what you want of all stop special [ __ ] before you [ __ ] this man oh that's your my fault this is for all of us from your third shifts they're all white noise some people with no tea for this small [ __ ] third shift third shift back to one that's two o'clock in the morning till next given offense cook set two waffles that white lady with the [ __ ] up teeth do you want how you want to extend if you want them done over easy wherever you need waked tight tear up yeah here boy for real stop I'm gonna do what she did well they better believe is what she do boy get big it off issue bigger this girl that made me some goddamn Reese's peanut butter cups from scratch so she young let me see him then I'm gonna tell you what she just gave us and he's got their Christmas calling hold up let me see let me read the Christmas card out loud for Miami it says some gifts go under the tree [Applause] [ __ ] y'all and some go right in your hands Merry Christmas and these it boy she gave us a bunch of free drink free for the waffles free beverage thank oh you dumb [ __ ] hell yeah go there just like this [ __ ] let me get five drinks oh okay you get the can right here is Here I am hold up I'm sitting up good right and you know you two [ __ ] what the third ship at Waffle House [ __ ] with [ __ ] hell yeah yeah I'll be standing outside smoking them cigarettes watching us no job it should be the world of me we appreciate all y'all at the Waffle House you gonna pay by a fool a get one free breakfast right yeah hold 50 now you get all three of our food at the Waffle House $25 all three meals you won't have to buy the drinks cuz we got free drinks I said a bigger came but I'm from the South they [ __ ] with me on the third ship at Waffle House I give a damn about what you say y'all what you think I got the coupons for the free drink Carlos don't you do it alone bigger than some money stop think of this money house cooks that ain't got no cheese thank you to the homeless here you go get the [ __ ] out of food big [ __ ] what Miami somebody gonna go get that free drink tonight hey let me get one of them sweet teas here you go you gotta get a sweet tea you can't get nothin else like I can't get no orange juice then a drink you want anything all right you ain't [ __ ] good night we ain't no now I gotta find a Waffle House how you doing today she just got paid they trick J try to drink it wait a minute they try to trick [ __ ] in Miami now they I come to Miami last time Lily you should go and see Miami Gardens up like oh that sounds safe until you get over there real I think this open lock the other just tried to change the goddamn thing what about the public meeting project there [ __ ] in cream you see that she said don't be talking about the beans like that you're right I'm a bean [ __ ] that juice tears later exactly stupid a vegetable I think my white man right here just lit up a Swisher would not mimic but the tobacco that's what it is you a-hole that's the nice [ __ ] that [ __ ] the blue Powerpuff girls just walk by hey Buttercup where you going think you know found a white woman in Miami it isn't gonna last this bad with blue hair [ __ ] she up to that's the white later you see when you walk in the Adam and Eve story so what are you guys looking to get into we got all types of different type of things to make your sex life spice stuff it's one of them freaky white girl if she liked the XP let her booty put it in my ass put it in my ass what's up playa didn't hear she won't lay she been walking all day [Applause] don't cover your face up like we can't see you ma'am that's the third member of the city girls the manager you know you want to scoop too soon scoot scoot scoot scoot scoot scoot scoot [Music] [Music] you know this security lady right here you fight look at that ponytail yeah yeah she'll beat up [ __ ] you that's right that's right up your [ __ ] they got you in Lucy club shirt top your [ __ ] on TV feeling like a real geek up in this [ __ ] auntie says [ __ ] y'all [ __ ] [ __ ] [ __ ] is wrong with you that's right auntie no you - auntie [ __ ] got mediate fingers she got that ponytail like the girl they fall asleep all the time when you in middle school is sleepy knee oh good time we given out [Applause] [Music] look at her go get that don't be ashamed all my priest ring what is wrong with you what am I gonna do when I go to wipeout spin spin that darlings well sin it calls for a drink I can't take these damn I want a free drink I got [ __ ] up the Waffle House plug damn man you stood up with two cell phone line I want to make sure people see you what the [ __ ] snake and said give me your Android I got a big top top yeah you can hold two cell phone lights up like you bout to land the airplane up there my father maybe put them right now your battery going down got to both cell phone who you wit we was here the tweets y'all was tweet that it heard the [ __ ] up what [ __ ] yeah I got here on time we start on time Omega you was on time [ __ ] don't be on time her talking [ __ ] what the [ __ ] nah you gotta understand you got a boyfriend you got a man he right there that man y'all ain't getting no arguments about which I was going way up before the show most [ __ ] was in the house arguing before they came [ __ ] don't win it [ __ ] they gonna talk about you see in front row I like how you put that [ __ ] together I ain't never seen the leopard-print with the camera flies like that let me see okay your cheetah ain't you you know I'm a [ __ ] Stan oh oh oh they can defrost uh-huh I can't even see them are they standing up [Applause] boy she had from everybody holding a head we shout out to all the fellas in here dressed exactly like they lady you look dumb as hell wait wait you look stupid [ __ ] you you made all that noise and everybody knows your dumb ass y'all in here dressed in the same pajamas what the [ __ ] wrong with y'all going to be here right after this huh Peeta my fault y'all get blessing ladies if you're man dressed like you that [ __ ] is a 1 that [ __ ] want to make sure everybody know this is me all right he trans like you tending ain't got nowhere to stay I put the shirt on I guess is what you want to do what are ya officially they won't make no noise little boy hear somebody in the building what the fellows is this dress like then later tonight if you dress the light stand up if you're letting it dressed it like you're very loud adjust the light stand up stand up and this [ __ ] stay ma'am you stand up by yourself with your boyfriend a ghost where your finger Hey he stood over here girl we both look like chicken boys do all this [ __ ] gave up a [ __ ] in love love I guess it's better yes longer the elevator to release you right I guess this t-shirt you want me to put on a couple don't nobody make you feel bad about your outfit than your girl your girl got the ability to make or break your outfit coz when she see is she gonna let you know how she feel about it are you walking aroma a few slices that [ __ ] you ain't going nowhere she walking until I look just close the door man you be real guys the beauty yeah yeah in that real good ha ha choose sound like the confit yeah [ __ ] salute all the Haitian names the Haitian [ __ ] to go buy a Gucci outfit with the heart bottoms [ __ ] no socks [ __ ] no socks gucci no socks that [ __ ] got on the goddamn uncle feels fresh they only fainted oh [ __ ] the guy didn't get on the Pope [ __ ] a boat I didn't get it on boats I'm staying on land [ __ ] where you don't have to know how to swim [ __ ] that over there over came over like yeah knocked the snot out how huh I knew I would get it they got their water when some splashed on me and all my lotion came out I like I don't know what the [ __ ] they got in that water but my old buddy and she like I've been at the bottom of the poop my elbows [ __ ] [ __ ] that's another thing I'm scared of you get stung by a jellyfish now you gotta have somebody piss on you [ __ ] what the [ __ ] that's the only way it's gonna work get out of here Kelly [ __ ] around with you you know why I love coming by a blow why cuz the big women still with a two-piece I don't give a [ __ ] that's right baby top your big sheet boy what what you ain't swing yeah well yet if you go on the beach with your two-piece on which the ass out like Liz oh that's right she's confident yeah that's right she took her stomach down in her tights and she don't give a damn what anybody's got to say that's right [ __ ] that y'all suck that stomach up in there it's always a real big ass girl and a real skinny one will help occator hanging all over [ __ ] it look whit the whole time she need when I tell you son I love big girls love never give a runner-up the sleepover I treat you like a newborn big girls our loved ones you different they're gonna make sure you straight all day you hungry baby like no I just ate what either a like a robo you over what does it be feel free to stay i I've new big girls was different when I was [ __ ] one she hooked the PlayStation up with no instructions ma'am and she know how to play that mother [ __ ] will beat you at madman 2k and take you in the room McGee's from hit that make your feet turn into fists [ __ ] yo big ass they got a batter over tool smell like sweat you know this is very good if you play outside [Applause] [Music] this is the cold and sit down it's beautiful you've been booed at one second make one left via some beautiful [ __ ] she think of Miami got some of the most colorful dangerous neighborhoods in the world you pull up you when you when you cross that bridge [ __ ] changed so if you come off that bridge you see the biggest Ridge you like oh I have entered into the danger zone why do you do that why did I met y'all [ __ ] up like that you know hey 83 now you got fold fold big-ass dress now you got to keep ducking everywhere you go skiing right like a [ __ ] just lay all these dreams down and ironed them like yep I got it down then I got dancer like a bull but I knew y'all Nick got that with him some different kind of [ __ ] I something you wanted up [ __ ] with the big dre is rolling the blood and named it Marcus I'm like a backwoods too yeah this is the home of first 48 right this way it all start that [ __ ] come on go little peanut shot three times did it cut to the person what you over him play the 9-1-1 call when against the come get them crocodile had a shoot again don't nobody take a crack like florida but you put saying Kaka you can oh [ __ ] no more they got name power them write whatever you if you ain't used to seeing white people get talked to like that it'll scare you when you first got the floor them white do [ __ ] get the gas save yourself get out of the way [ __ ] puss and crackle you're like oh wait a minute hey bro what the [ __ ] is wrong with you next [ __ ] they put that crap it [ __ ] know that talk that [ __ ] the people Isaiah credit footbag cracker do the move it Ichigo boo saying crap what saying crap but then you got y'all down here yeah I got some crackers there's nickels you will see the white man with the big-ass dress white man with 32 crew look well y'all got walk the day go right there we're going at them right there look at our new how'd he get so shitty taking that [ __ ] you better not say [ __ ] I will be our last [ __ ] who you is how the [ __ ] you get your hair to stay like that you must have put some Elmer's glue in yo [ __ ] yeah why people here don't lock up like that you know how he make his [ __ ] stay like that Wow gotta hate white people that might have been that might have been too much fun man good album oh you tryin to say it went over their head yep no real talk like y'all have so straight that [ __ ] got it baby it's price of wild [ __ ] you know what you gotta use mayonnaise that's the only way you could do it gennadiy you gotta focus real hard concentrate not imagine a kid like you got to all the different type of Spanish people down here that's like watery in the Cubans well yeah what a humor there for the Cubans so so did you [ __ ] it Cubans they start dancing who say something who thing [Music] [Music] [Applause] [Music] [Music] what I wonderful friends see it I went to my father ever - I went to heaven - ma boy don't nobody make you wanna buy some cologne like in Spanish [ __ ] the beer Macy's yeah you know you need to this fetid smell oh cool no baby to come in so you don't see it's pretty one time that's what you need that's what you leave whole thing all day let's all day let's all day you wanna go spray one time I had a gift pack a 112 you get a gift you get in Cologne you get this all and everything come on you don't know it's gonna lead to poverty you stay here you stay here get it from me I can take care of you for one time [Music] Oh everything oh well hey go - oh I'd be too happy for those individuals will be baby go wait I'll be hated in every community they love us you'll be waiting - ads about any heckler you are black bladed [ __ ] how you gonna make noise on behalf of the Spanish community you everything I know she won't see want that free drink I got so many oceans like we got evening is an orange go home see this opening or every whoa Wow ah move looking on a tee she ties she's like yeah hey I'm still trying to figure out who the hell James Knight is I don't know but that's his sentence there's nothing waiting why is it attached to a hotel oh no any y'all never stayed in the James Hill old nice in a hotel I'm over here now she'd smoke that do not I did that my man lit up is - my man lit up a regular swishing and that was the end of it oh yeah the smoke we see yeah I think I've been in here more minute y'all get the church ladies in here highs here I can't even go into Church a minute these [ __ ] that came in what [ __ ] rainy well oh boy good skittles it's not a crazy dog these hoes but damn man your bun really is shaped like a dick that's crazy it got a hit on the nerd thing that's crazy she put her head on hey what type of hair you wanna put that dick head on the top of my fine you got so I tear these [ __ ] to suck my dick they could know what I mean well y'all better not [ __ ] with them they're like you in a hotel room at Motel 6 and run a train on you so we'll thought what it dig in you sit there like a [ __ ] stop get off me Bob tell their big girl put a circle back over come on come on hey y'all made uh85 sideshow shirts let me see what they look like oh boy that look like a project Power Rangers in this mother ghetto twins every Beach we go [ __ ] no boats oh you hear me [Applause] [Music] [Applause] [Music] I'm two feet [ __ ] I got one mole I got a color for in the clouds II got it you know what they got circles only I put a bun all mine who beat your bank [ __ ] us but my bun straight this male Carlos Carlos your frontal showing yeah yo front of Sean beats you hold the show don't hold lace for I pull it up get up turn it around we're back was like a bomb crazy you got a back up in the club beat you got to do this y'all [ __ ] them up I hate people who burned at the stake you know it's thank you sit on the edge and it does come up off that [ __ ] you know you all right now ain't really breathing it is Bubba right all dust on it then they had a nerve that offer you a snake you want something to eat not this [ __ ] I don't know that [ __ ] got mold on it they put they flash it on the night to come see us when they get them loquacious eyelashes big as a [ __ ] get hot outside pitch blink on me I'm hot please I need some air then I found out yesterday y'all muhfuckas is wearing mink eyelashes that's the up wait yes yeah Ted here running back I didn't hear you but you make eyelashes like the fur from of me that's what the was to be real long mink eyelashes oh they are like the coat yes the [ __ ] the same [ __ ] as bait the comb a that of that's what the eyelashes made out of every [ __ ] in here with some meat see there you go Walter lately with the mink eyelashes that don't be ashamed that's right [ __ ] is it the real further or dude you got the fake [ __ ] now you can say little ones it's fake the ones that spake be plastic the [ __ ] get hard in the Sun see me damn well you got so she ate the same cuddle is the living here box your [ __ ] press I had the same colors drugged his people ah no see don't feel I don't give a damn what you do ladies longer this [ __ ] make you feel good do this [ __ ] right put whatever on that [ __ ] all babies cute yeah dammit going into every room and take four hours to come out looking like a whole dumb [ __ ] every time I don't care listen Walsh's arse look [ __ ] that women doing it I think sex is just going there from take a shower put some lotion on that's the samples like you look like a whole new [ __ ] when you shine ain't no [ __ ] [ __ ] can't do the enhance they self up and get some money make that withdrawal that's it it's the money [ __ ] stop walking around with with regular enhancements on lady what if you see the negative hand on some goddamn prosthetic muscles this [ __ ] just walking around big as a [ __ ] with the fake muscles come he give me another you know Nikki gonna explode they do gotta make kind of like Bo taught me like anything at all real that's cooking man some Italians what do we get there they gonna make no noise me and real optimistic a different outlook [ __ ] these [ __ ] know like she let me go back uptown cuz I had better look up there what do we do yeah that's right UK and eyeball here to the [ __ ] imagine if you see me like this today and then the MA come with some dreams like the [ __ ] from Miami like yeah we hit this [ __ ] take that week the [ __ ] off your ring they keep tapping at bumper wallet [ __ ] that in here they got the goddamn a lace front make some noise don't laugh they would their make no good yeah okay now they left with a shoulder did you got a hairpiece yeah go home and peel your hair [ __ ] like me like opening up an hour later like anything she learn about feet boy she's six moms yeah a guru shitty ghost and I say buh-bye you go to the doctor to get this [ __ ] yeah someone could I take the little [ __ ] series they going to stop and eat like Zoe no does the case that [ __ ] trying to pull it they won't [Applause] yeah oh it's different ones they got something that you can just get at the barbershop where they just let your hair grow with still grow and then they shade the top part off where don't grow and then put some like lace front glue on the top of your [ __ ] and then stick a high-top fade on top of it and cut it down beyond me and then you got the ones like real [ __ ] really be in the barbershop or through the process and maybe I'm now in the bottom of the video anybody stupid we're up the guy to grow my [ __ ] back and get a booth of a being [ __ ] it you can for you if you get opposed to faint and you let you do whatever lives through it I would save all my house oh damn I want in on Yusei so you said if Carlos didn't get a lace-front you won't go ball he got to get the faint no hey okay got you and yeah I'm talking my you got to go all the way ball like this shave all your [ __ ] on you now this belt was made in Miami so okay yeah what's it L baby baby she said look bit later witness that don't get no booth to faint baby yeah if I was you I got the booster P I'm [ __ ] zoom at the Waffle House let you know if your hairline is running from your eyebrows it's time to let it go it's over with just cut it off at least you'll know what you're gonna look like what's your you in they ain't no going back what you say lets you cut me up and ain't much for you to cut [ __ ] you want y'all barbers no yeah Bobby Brothers suit up yeah make brothers invite y'all bopping [ __ ] be disrespectful y'all be tryin to impress [ __ ] for no reason I went to the barbershop [ __ ] was trying to brush this [ __ ] I'm like [ __ ] what are you brushing my self-esteem what the [ __ ] is wrong with you ain't nothing up there yeah y'all [ __ ] way to extra neg land Sam I want to go get a shave [ __ ] put some [ __ ] on my eyebrows hold the [ __ ] up my umbrella hey no [ __ ] touch my own oh right that [ __ ] like by week nine would you like that no John John knob what Elvis this all we got maybe you [ __ ] this up in a nice thing you know I'm sitting the chick even backed up 30 feet there we spoke they get all right about you trying to snitch don't follow me [ __ ] ass [ __ ] who follow you the light may move [ __ ] what their swing on your hair with a light man that I don't even see this [ __ ] one of my [ __ ] little dress put their foul stupid a nice hey you already nobody brought is that girl okay crack off they're doing that puts that [ __ ] [ __ ] white dude with the trains go up there Hotlanta man you worked in life from here on now we trust you we know you ain't gonna run off with the goddamn plug and [ __ ] [ __ ] turn right back this way big right hi hi y'all yeah I was going to cut these dress today [Applause] what a single ladies at tonight we have in it we gotta ask where y'all live that's one question but with a single ladies this [ __ ] tonight I piss in that [ __ ] went from about 200 to 11 right begin with its it is not in here for the slot machine yes what you problem Miami Gardens overlocking you can't even go see her it's gonna be voting naked standing at the bottom mother still who you over here dizzy ain't going no projects I'm a key rabbi be ready to go to the front over lager her own City all them dangerous as places in Miami said it ain't that bad she it is that ain't that bad you get over there then next thing you hear boo Chico being shot twice wallet out comedian shot tonight in Miami Garden State said there's nothing more coming up on that stories development right now yeah and all it is is your auntie or the new I don't know why he would he would come over here to see the girl he knew what time the was over here then they always got one bigger who don't old [ __ ] who don't approve of the neighborhood that's all damn damn boy do they ride up and down the street with that old loud ass music and shooting it [ __ ] at each other that's all they they'll do what do they gotta make news it's a real [ __ ] event okay see they're all different the crew right they showed up late on purpose man let everybody sit in we're gonna bust a here with the crock pot right make about to go on top and start serving being he's up top look we got chicken wings and beans if you want the macaroni to set your fire got a goatee for this [ __ ] yeah with a lady zip with the goals in Miami with the ladies with the Carmen harmony harmony gold harmony like you've been doing this yeah this is the home of music how many know Trina part don't know that [ __ ] wrap that [ __ ] lady what you say if you want to [Applause] now there's the harem for five or six best friends nasty [ __ ] yo no doubt ho he's gone yeah yeah yo Sam ratchet [ __ ] slanted you got to get Trina her credit though she was the first city girl he's young [ __ ] loose Trina was the first one who wrapped that whole person all the women who used to be hunching behind the house yep look fast ask girl boy luncheon behind the house in Florida was always fun the weather always perfect house Trina was the first city girl all that [ __ ] the truth hunt you behind the house in the summer shared with a baby at the baby project with a baby right baby game I want to see the baby then go to baby who bought the baby baby to put the baby just walk around this show with a baby a baby huh he holding the baby won't abate security Oh baby got mo had in my baby let's [ __ ] up go to sleep my baby ball here baby got my babies hey ain't grown people y'all oh this baby of a violent make everybody insane baby shark till she go to sleep who the [ __ ] the pair is here now if anybody doesn't walk up here like that yes so you know where your baby come out when you got cut they going back in the Bat mobile you so pretty see the baby over here spoke I'll of he's singing to the baby so pretty over here with you don't know where you are right now your mommy bought you out the house chica and leave you by yourself hello she need to find y'all so yeah do such a pretty little baby she got new looking at these people crazy she got no [ __ ] man me like you died my daddy [Music] what's your name Haiti fire sounds oh good for the key is to hold on wait cut the music what's your name pretty baby yo my toe you already you don't want to talk to the people why see now I do my stop yeah we'll just with me [Music] that was awesome dude what you saying would be or what's a sign with me I know what a maker filled with your uber Jupiter ppqe Oh what dude your baby baby - good I'm a great dad a great daddy if you like that baby you're gonna lure Mikey see see gonna be out good hold my hand now we friends now the name Italia well your parents it right here they black people they walk me they walked her in here you already know she was talking [ __ ] I wish I [ __ ] would say somebody at my [ __ ] baby oh he's got them Oh anywhere you put that crackle say anything about my baby Chico you are crazy get on people they baby big bad 9000 inserts and y'all ain't know what [ __ ] ain't nobody got no cookies it meant for the baby but ain't nobody got no Juicy Juice a little friend better go backstage and get there baby some chips go get the baby some snacks hey there's black people okay you want some chips yeah we get baby some chips all right little pretty no water deuce got no cup battery you are such a no pretty baby look at your nose been running you got the way the one I know you're my man you bring no wives to wife you know I don't do you like my mama used to do me and liquor finger and wipe my [ __ ] you I hate you don't you're not related to that baby no you go I thought only a mini family could do that yeah okay I'm not to get you back to you Chico that's right let me give me you want me to get you back to your mama so wrap me today at it now looking for your way oh they're doing it now they favor gotta sign a waiver so she could be able to show anybody else brinkmate cheers well we don't want no kids to be left out listen she's gonna listen she gonna remember this for the rest of her life when we put this out on YouTube make sure you say this video to show her and she grow up and be like girl you was a star at the 85 south show a higher which Oh beautiful say I'm rain what a parent said all the parents do here make some noise take care of your kids honey and Yuki I am even blaming you because we disap a lot of black people in here so we got a shout-out to everybody in here they left their kids at home with Nicki is that's the most [ __ ] [ __ ] ever you will leave your kids at home with your kids that's probably why she ain't leave without your home because our oldest baby with her daddy is weekend so she couldn't stay home and watch you right now you know black folks you say you want your baby that make a grown-ass man grown a baby this big he'll know that [ __ ] trough [ __ ] 31 hey I'm in here with my mom too ya know and it goes slow yeah since don't you [ __ ] start [Applause] [Music] [Applause] under guys out and then don't be offended we make fun of everybody at ourselves we make fun everybody slow people love us they watch the show too and they try to rows back yeah a bit roasted by a slow person the same way you look in slow people they look at you slow dude they're trying to roast me on my Instagram let him know looking they get scared you laugh like I have nope not I don't want to go to hell it's okay to laugh man but this is real story and they tell you they let you like you see boy am i hugging the Marla so just be like I do now they do we know who yeah I seen a group I met the mall you know they take them out yeah in the white man and he kept trying to speak and she didn't know it that he knew me he killed [Music] [Applause] exactly how the [ __ ] could I make up some [ __ ] like they who can't really [ __ ] heavy I wish it when it happened that's really shitty with food like [ __ ] take a picture with that thing he was a head - Hey - girl they love us people love us at all communities the wheelchair community come out they're mentally ill community because I want to change me down chase me down I won't found it I shouldn't ask them I won't buy anything you got down spin [Music] anything out and it's free with the [Music] catch one of Miami they still be gay - who's there - [ __ ] stop me no we are [ __ ] oh so what no we don't give a [ __ ] these are jokes that's the wrong with the world now Bubba see because everybody wasn't born like this I know some [ __ ] who's real gangsters again shot oh yeah oh it's a lot of em salute all those [ __ ] the guy shot and then deadly all of us know what King stands [ __ ] the got shot and they got a little eager handful but he's still again I got this thing called me to do it like on the Bailey putting on bout to say they got a good dog that's all he got you got a good dog Hey don't come hit me out right here some of my back okay get it can you grab that up I fell right there thank you this might be put it in the cuff off my hand yep and because you got any creases yeah isn't agree that's what they laughing now I'm some real [ __ ] when you did that just reminded me burn right I know you go to the stripper you always see the handicapped dude you know we see the partners in there trying to make sure he hasn't been like [ __ ] don't get enough critical eye we look at applying a homeboy that's not all that did they take that on board to do to the solute whoever that was you a real friend look at her she pointed her homegirl like [ __ ] dancer type of friend I need in my life move my legs with me if they stop working that's what I'm talking about make sure your lawyers you in here with your best friend what's your partner if you ain't here with your partner I'll talk about your Road Dogg that you won't go to war will quick to what Elmo yeah not leave you scare and Beach they stab me Oh scary I'm tough about hey if you were here with your real don't ever forget that you made noise at this show if y'all ever fall out don't never tell all the goddamn business don't do that that's when she you're lame as hell can't wait to tell y'all fallout you don't say [ __ ] even if they say something don't let they lure to [ __ ] your thumb right rear this ain't lame don't let them [ __ ] your character being old stupid an but it's certain cause it's cause the [ __ ] man like a view a homeboy and that you a certain [ __ ] you just don't do don't [ __ ] with your homeboy girl you don't sleep you don't steal from your partners [ __ ] you don't lower your partner's you laugh for your pilots but you don't lie on your partner's well fellas we got to learn how to laugh I applaud this a little better learn how it's the partner fault cuz the [ __ ] put you in the land want to even tell you there Jimmy [ __ ] don't give you no can of water and his girls is calling you confine well I was just checking on you I heard a car break last night ooh just know that fellas you gotta do it like the ladies do what they don't flinch it don't matter what you call her friend with a man with the foot with the foot happen I heard I got into a car wreck yes Oh [Music] immediately she oh boy yes my back baby bring the ice back back here we so lucky to be alive we are so lucky to be alive like III yeah I I didn't make a show but the look women of [ __ ] they laugh she'll pull up later on that day in the same car but I keep the light going my trunk won't open faster ladies how y'all learned a lot so good at what age do you I learned a lot so good it's an instinct it's an instant when they ask a question they've been through the worst of all y'all do not learn how to live from us cuz we don't never get away y'all catch us in every lie we ever told let me answer ladies I need one lady to answer this question for me hello I just made give me one i'ma come back you give me I need one lady back answer this quick what's the best line [ __ ] ever told you that you believe that you believe that's too easy that's too easy I love you we all believe that go fish hello what do you say the only girl he was talking to Erica oh that's an elementary school laughs we talk about good lies oh look the Dutch were here what'd she say she had a baby that it was baby now they may be but so we thought my next level lies what a [ __ ] tell you wit ha we got to hear what this [ __ ] said ma'am what'd he say ma'am he was this sumbitch house for two days he went he gonna make a drop and you ain't the [ __ ] out for two days [ __ ] what are you dropping up maybe you lame is here you don't go say well y'all go lay up with the [ __ ] she buzzed [ __ ] and go home he made a drop drop some dick off over there hey for the [ __ ] in the car and tow that [ __ ] look yo uber holding away yeah and that's the fucked-up part about [ __ ] this [ __ ] just sitting like this even ditch I thought we was past that you never passed it it was what identity what do you say start over she said the [ __ ] never met the houses she had to go pick him off no she said the [ __ ] never met the Greyhound station [ __ ] that no no no but since you want to go down there she go through them ready yeah yeah we got look everybody who standing up noses hell and want to hear the rest of us yeah yeah if I wanna hear this [ __ ] I'm gonna sit in my lunch no we don't need no music could we go all be quiet so we can hit this [ __ ] ladies and gentlemen welcome to the 85 look at that [ __ ] nice too late [ __ ] eat your wings eat your ways so Chico ESCO didn't get the [ __ ] version what what what's your name Mimi don't get the bigger name for this anime me where you from Miami so Mimi you said he said he was making a drop and he went and stayed with the woman for two whole days and then you say what happened the gray hair well I all the busses go back that bit the [ __ ] now now now we'll hear from the plaintiff 85 South Joe divorce word is live the defendant or the defendant my bad I'm [ __ ] excuse me wait wait Delancy man state his case absurd [ __ ] how you ended up at the great house wait let him come stay this case oh that's a question wait wait a minute [ __ ] all that to be wait wait wait wait dude a baby rattle West Palm Beach Palm Beach to Miami of this visit more for good come on huh we know is like two and a half hours of traffic hours away it was doing a drop and he didn't want to pay for the uber because it's - I was in 45 minutes from West Palm to Miami so there's only $60 so he wanted to pay for the greyhound West Palm Beach and a greyhound and beat you in - go get him listen listen yeah he must be [ __ ] the [ __ ] out her she said yeah look at all the [ __ ] here with a greyhound ticket like [ __ ] [ __ ] this [ __ ] [ __ ] it up for Chico yes the girl he [ __ ] sitting up top like she ain't lying right let him look at a big Haitian [ __ ] record me for other people yeah what and you don't wipe yep that's right God are you the big black baby you like you from what condo what it is God you ain't here looking like the staples easy button look at you I salute you sir oh my goodness Oh looking at Tomatoes oh [ __ ] she looked like a 6 a is mild acidic like that [ __ ] this [ __ ] just gave me a chain to say mister don't nut burger when you notice all you make don't add burgers what you got y'all business tell him about mr. doughnut burger yeah [ __ ] back [ __ ] that was the worst pitch ever put the fun tell them about your village yeah yeah good present on that burger what else [ __ ] we know that much Busta Rhymes live mr. donut burger what major doing it [ __ ] really like it took like taking doughnuts and put hamburgers between but timeout long hold up you acting like diabetes ain't running rampant in the black community why are you trying to kill you people first but time out lows and we're gonna do that to the [ __ ] fellas what's the best liar girl ever told you [ __ ] good luck I've been I'm tough mother what's the best life a woman ever to hold on time out we got one right what'd you say me that's your white lady right there you only get the answer top out what'd you say what'd she say he don't mean lad - what happened she said she what happened one time she he said well we'll talk about what it was but she said it was only once it happen more than once she [ __ ] off on you one [ __ ] that [ __ ] land that's what it was ladies y'all lies too deep you start lying at night buy some [ __ ] you're gonna do it 20:21 that's how good Jolly all your friends know the plan everybody gonna be with it you got a hold [ __ ] you gray go to got there and pull to Cantor wit and y'all have been planning this trip for two years and your negatives think you're going to stay with your family on a greyhound Oh he was like that thought you had a ticket with it every go get oh he liked it I got right ladies standing up there at the bus station dicks dicks thanking and sticky you know here you watch it big boy 11 most of the ladies in stage yeah we're real simple we drove all the way up there two and a half hours man is a bug bug and was a man all the way back and you know I try and miss you slipping a big don't do 60 there Altima ladies that's good that you stayed out with your man do a little bit of turmoil you cuz you ain't gonna do that but find another [ __ ] to get you some new turmoil so you might as well stick to it [ __ ] you know you know I tend to binge on wine it's gonna be worse cuz ladies all y'all do is go tell him all y'all do is go tell the new [ __ ] all this [ __ ] the old [ __ ] tears so he'd know exactly what not to let you see this [ __ ] went to [ __ ] West Palm Beach with two days with a busy court degree on this and they're gonna phone castle his Greyhound subscription I would never do no [ __ ] like that to you girl ain't no way in the world green hail the bus how many seats are them over there better to wear we give every man about the other [ __ ] you did they don't give a [ __ ] about the puzzle they know you gonna get some puzzle they just find out loose [ __ ] to get man out so you feed [ __ ] you feed [ __ ] fouling would you start doing man here you be some simple [ __ ] like that to the fish to goddamn finger licking that was it finger licking every [ __ ] hit me again boy happen do you think it's a head to jump in your [ __ ] buck that you made you feel like a whole [ __ ] uniform fitted [ __ ] she go like you poor baby I just took it a finger lick up I'm thinking look stop playing stop playin [ __ ] ain't doing it to the negative though she keeping them hand down you hear me like you wanna hit me if you want to we can yell all day but [ __ ] you ain't hitting nobody these we're gonna take off on you a quick beach over there somebody somebody's when we're gonna swing on yourself they hit hard like [ __ ] like [ __ ] you was raised with your brothers don't clap for that you see you think violence against men is acceptable oh yeah they do think is acceptable pretending I'm not except a mystic pilot it don't matter how bad you beat your [ __ ] ass he's still going to jail that's the fucked-up part think you show up [ __ ] face like no powwow big ass scratch let me claim to lock you up [ __ ] you're stupid for even calling now okay once you you ain't staying about about dialing nine hit the gray [ __ ] then I believe y'all are laughing at violence whatever ladies look if you won't do that [ __ ] don't get the police involved in Salt Lake a bit yep y'all be wondering for the police tell them make a defend yourself you didn't hit me with 9030 peace combinations I don't hate them all you didn't hit me with the toaster the lamp you didn't stop me out as soon as I got damn push you with Cooper jump on the [ __ ] hair something they got you put your [ __ ] hands on me you like [ __ ] I'm bleeding look at my face she know what Joanne's with two hours you just give up like [ __ ] you warned see then went through the wall she in the bathroom now okay believe you right well I bet you clumsy [ __ ] you did that don't do that look at shot you are hugging all the phones you ain't calling nobody have you got a plugger phone you [ __ ] what a real hood [ __ ] she still got a house phone kicking [ __ ] over who where his still got a house phone like a landline hey y'all must feel they were so everybody who fought it look at what your Nana will be surprised how much of Atlanta you still need a landline that's why it's so different raising kids my daughter got a good like [ __ ] I usually try to sleep and talk to [ __ ] on the phone remember you I call at 9:30 I'm gonna let it ring one time you ask them up ring hello hello hello what's going on with you next thing you know I know you ain't up here on my [ __ ] phone click hey kids I got to worry about this [ __ ] no more me I never get out and talk to freak you to a girl over because she downstairs on the phone [ __ ] she on the phone they gotta go downstairs I got off the phone because she on the phone sleep let it's been some fell asleep on the freaky top y'all free but then your mama so disrespectful she say oh that's what you do you like to lick what hello click oh yes before there was you like do yes that's what I like to do bah get off the phone now what would I say yes maybe they didn't even listen to see if you was on the phone just picked up my work i'ma start pressing them oh I need to use it get our Father ate in front of partying when you hear them trying to be sneaky you're picking up the phone you think you oughta do it [ __ ] I hear you get off the phone that was back in the collar I see days when it was a whole nother machine call ID back when you had to use the answering machine and leave music on that [ __ ] that was the days you called [ __ ] yeah hello you have reached Chico sorry I can't get to the phone right now but if you just leave your name but nothing every time I see your face yeah just leave your name and number I'll get back with you soon as I can so for this [ __ ] well I used to be people that beat a homeboy who call you take the goofy [ __ ] over there girl I used to be Peter why no I hate what's up why I hate you I hate you my daughter did that [ __ ] to me I call her she like hello I'm like hey baby what's going on nothing I can't really hear you hello I still can't hello baby we're gonna [ __ ] trouble girl oh hello speak louder I can't hear you daddy my hello sigh got this playing I'm like damn it you put the [ __ ] [ __ ] make you mad you can't even leave a message and she didn't say it daddy honest [ __ ] so let me ain't nobody else calling this you wanna [ __ ] with with me only want to be baddest [ __ ] I don't know when if you find these Martin Lawrence couches for us but we appreciate that's a red carpet for little people it's like are you having a baby shower you put this [ __ ] out for the kids to walk on Thank You Santa what you'll say baby shower want my hand now want some of the meatballs that be at the baby shower dippy [ __ ] is there anybody here know how to make them yeah oh yeah that let it go out of baby shower behavior out of hold like it'll push up you can always that's cute if you don't know what to buy the baby shower will bring to a big child simple bottle so you gotta bring baby that we thirsty said all that [ __ ] this deal got a Burberry shirt from the baby shower in the closet that's a black man national treasure you go to your baby shower you gotta see if you still father's trying to sneak in where the goddamn third berry shirt this year can't wait up every chef with sweet pea [Music] she said any cloud full of smoke God look like this y'all look like the people that beyond first 48 that don't want the identity revealed yeah I thought wasn't what I was gonna say she just I just see me me at the Christmas party telling people I met my way hearing she said never mind oh just okay no a time five come on cheat on noise here you specie a toy off a stripper baby what it ladies that they got a man but you want another one okay baby like ma that is the eighty-five sound show baby right there that's she is checked on the baby what's your she's standing up just walk around he'll walk around playing with people so soon when she gonna be walking up you better be lucky she can't talk too good because you know she appeared out of mind you got gangs on your phone go home Oh baby cool baby no crybabies yet tasty there it's all we want to say every goddamn day a little push a day got Kenny move my mom back you know with the worst when they be having their babies on the airplane to be crying man oh my god I went around black people got natural instinct company kids though Agatha goddamn fool you posed to [ __ ] him up right there right let me tell you something what's going on we take a finished arranged [ __ ] child let's go chop around me doing some of that stupid [ __ ] so stupid and so pompous fool and apologize right now boy that's the fucked-up part Oh hers don't be what to be concerned with a kids until somebody else try to raise them you ain't paying no attention to your kid soon as the teacher be like your son really needs some help and he's coming in he's showing a displaying behavior that there's just very abusive he's very aggressive and Claire first of all [ __ ] don't be talking bad about my [ __ ] baby like ma'am well your son isn't great they left because there still may be night and period some of y'all got little badass kids though you know you got a badass little kid racing those of your kid you know your child bad as a mofo people want haunted don't be [ __ ] you know your baby bad as a [ __ ] you didn't seen them be bad cursing out at all shut up [ __ ] ah yeah peckish you funny Jojo set up [ __ ] then why you are beat be a table a sometimes carries with no it ain't your phone you just picked the wrong [ __ ] they have kids with right you had a baby by the biggest dope boy in Miami you want them while your son that they kill with his shirt off all day that day you got this [ __ ] right off his daddy sucks of a baby you need to improve your behavior okay at least you do that to your baby catch today oh then you be mad to the ball [ __ ] message that wrong little quiet little boy at a big class by yourself in the back of the classroom like this all day baby walk past a hey now your baby got a concussion cuz he got [ __ ] up a little rah-rah daddy [ __ ] be a lazy you in school didn't appeal idea Robbie you saying this [ __ ] means that [ __ ] here rocking back and forth right right still got this year left the whole time he gonna laugh at the end all they won [Laughter] [Applause] something you got a recent beste thing about being crazy people don't respect you're crazy until you show my crazy you are some lady telling you I will [ __ ] your life leave what's wrong with a beats crazy in a MIG that don't scare a [ __ ] [ __ ] the man stays what kind of crazy [ __ ] she told you she was crazy leave her alone don't like to leave you wanna come alone crazy [ __ ] right you ain't green crazy [ __ ] change your life ladies are you [ __ ] with a [ __ ] that they got it all this [ __ ] don't yell like nothing you did did some [ __ ] you know was [ __ ] up we did some fucked-up [ __ ] like babies wrong with you say to me this you don't have to respect for me that I think you should man so it's not taking this [ __ ] off I want to show you like what you get ready for with the phone I turn on is they like that old Crazy Legs no you like oh poisoning I played okay the to be no [ __ ] that you get the grazing they gonna show up at your job ladies you won't be mad as a [ __ ] he walking that you walk in your job that [ __ ] dead talk about minute did you say yeah you like this yeah ladies don't like no salt day I don't stop at you to run over yeah I'm an old friendly Tyler Perry movie Kurt - [ __ ] what's wrong what's wrong coming whatever you need baby whatever you need I'll take care of you whatever you need whatever you need you think so man do your feet hurt do you do your backyard I'll rub your back I'll do whatever you need like looking at this man like oh they get away now get away if you like oh you so oh why you that push me like they then make a love me like yeah [ __ ] come here that's too bad you lose Miami women is they going in your shitty thing see keep my pink oh come on let poor angel abuse abuse is abuse harassment ain't no booze [Music] let's see if they'll do well you know your girl like guys to eat you ready to fight before you y'all got a [ __ ] up in there [ __ ] baby chill out now they gonna have to kill us they are pop the trunk baby pocket are you like is busy right now [ __ ] that they gonna have to kill us at this [ __ ] she like baby no oh no foot don't let it die for you [ __ ] let's die together bruh when your girl like them fight that's the worst thing you gotta keep control huh Smith me yo pizza pop-up well you see you're swinging it's the wedding it's a way to tell if your lady is mean and a [ __ ] like this is a secret you can tell like if you go out to eat Witter and they [ __ ] your order up and you be like red and it says you not only worry about it no no no no no excuse me excuse me excuse me sir cuz you come in for a second please um I don't know if you speak English but what did he order thank God that no no no no what did he order uh he said he wanted the chicken tenders does this look like [ __ ] chicken tenders to you these are shrimp stupid ass [ __ ] get my [ __ ] [ __ ] right and pay for this [ __ ] evil every bad night pay for this [ __ ] doc all this [ __ ] off the peel [ __ ] [ __ ] they gotta sit down you heard my [ __ ] right you can't say that you didn't sit there like she telling you [ __ ] about you you ain't even know my [ __ ] allergic to onions yo come and sitting there like I dare the show is a No I can't eat this [ __ ] [Applause] you're hoping she won't name let nobody look at you you ever better tomorrow you you ain't even paying attention you're looking at a shirt it's up here let me see that [ __ ] in the medium you know he he hail peach now that [ __ ] was looking let's go let's go because I'm not in the [ __ ] mood today [ __ ] just wanna look at [ __ ] since [ __ ] want to look I give a [ __ ] something the mother [ __ ] look at that shirt ugly anyway let's go [ __ ] that shirt I bought it I'll buy you another sir [Applause] you'll never see your girl when she do [ __ ] like this she always kiss to [ __ ] you young always going on she just seen you you standing somewhere yachting my [ __ ] line somewhere circular saying she don't need no help I'm helping him oh you hear you stand in line you hit your [ __ ] the [ __ ] down like what is you look at that [ __ ] turn your [ __ ] eyes around before you lose them this that's something face no [ __ ] like that turn your ass around before you do that so when y'all gonna have to fight though out there talking I'll do it some of the [ __ ] I'll become to be witnesses to peach I'll kiss your eyes beat will kill you have you ever say to me just looking at each other like that [Applause] beat our [Applause] Swayne hijo was way home oh yeah but tell you who they don't want no smoke quit though that girl they work near Walmart I've seen that same [ __ ] happen like a wall my right yeah I've seen the same [ __ ] happened there Walmart the girl behind the register that she was talking [ __ ] to didn't even look up beats hiked up behind that [ __ ] counter and beat your ass I wish the [ __ ] would jump behind the counter man there's not going to be somebody up at work jump over here please if it's a Walmart dare jump you're way too real yeah Colleen on a walker talking about the fight me it's come on being a manager I put them got their potatoes down bees come on their manager with the big heads booty show up Linda Linda come over there so what seems to be the problem you know a circuit a beat y'all not gonna do this in my store shut out the Walmart bit city lady was which department you were doing front and center front and Santa running says what sidewall watch you work it I didn't have a bender wall my whip defining it - Anna oh she's very similar oh oh you work in wood for its maximum grams all day oh good for spank they got a proprietor ever seen a [ __ ] with a wood for his bank account it'd be all dough things in it look like you got no idea I [ __ ] you take that long as money grand receipt encircled enough [ __ ] y'all novel right here the black one is freed along look at you promote Walmart and move it if you don't sit you've got bill watchful falling prices wears down ain't no real Bank [ __ ] loses car all the money go house customer sir she brother got [ __ ] at her house shell name post the hell over there she got worked on Walmart she's going the whole time if it's got a time a lamp machine at the help right C&M on phone you go on her how she got that blood pressure machine you sit in a [ __ ] who got the blood pressure check it yeah I walked it out with the Black Friday don't nobody be paying attention that day she got a whole drink machine at the house they put on a coat the second toes on the big you know they got my to know the Walmart they first throw it open up hey DC I say there's always national to crawl out what a shopper cause this is some ghetto [ __ ] we'd love to go to Walmart I'm gonna walk my seeing-eye right I know I don't know make it your own you see some [ __ ] you ever see it feels so good at Walmart you tell them I'll [ __ ] about it what you made you just got a cart full of [ __ ] [ __ ] hope it's winning you better get over there better get over there actually you go to Walmart after midnight bigoted [ __ ] turn into all different types of people in there that is whether the goons come out in Walmart after midnight all them people that's missing on that poster they work in that [ __ ] that's what the [ __ ] is going on you all the wall mounted two o'clock in the morning [ __ ] you gonna see some wild [ __ ] one thing you're gonna see is a big ass [ __ ] riding around on that wheelchair get in it can you reach up there and get in Felton place down please little bitty kids following right who is [ __ ] how big is somebody I thought if he was creeping up on me [Music] yeah I got the Spanish grocery stores in the hood now here like yeah they say oh my god Jesus how it'd be it'd be like they sell fruit and [ __ ] you ain't never seen before you like me a what type of watermelon is this nothing watermelon is they grab a melon so everything I do [ __ ] saw everything chips candy what's the name of the Spanish grocery stores down here we got Wow huh you can't say that look I wasn't there well that's pretzels present if day yeah I got a grocery store called prints up in Donna's mom [ __ ] hello look at all the Spanish people didn't know that [ __ ] went to the Spanish grocery store that [ __ ] like here may give me two of them carne asada with that orange seasoning on boy they don't even have like you know you're going to Walmart you can get you some sliced turkey and ham and you go into Spanish grocery store they got all types of [ __ ] the meat department what type of League is that is very cool if you want to throw I [ __ ] with the Spanish grocery store they all smell the same races sir [ __ ] you Andy without that don't smell like fabuloso you talk like you stay in the trailer park - then why your house we know folk grits anyway leave us don't break the house go get the lean Atlantic Michael Jackson lame will smell like Babel oh so we got it into Spanish story we smell like El fantastical I'm [ __ ] with the El Presidente next time I come now he I'm doing all my shopping at El Presidente your what this man is sold as one I've got them fool Tati here we gonna interpret their present didn't take Oh a don't be a kod tonight - oh yeah they gonna be a we think it's going to kod yeah I'm well you ain't beat I'm not going [ __ ] that last I went to the strip club in Miami one time I ain't been since Wow cuz different [ __ ] down here is disrespectful all you Street [ __ ] out here is getting a lot of money cuz I go to the strip club you know I mean I got me $300 I'm thinking I'm out to do some no you [ __ ] you [ __ ] I thought it sir this is a true story I go to get my wands it's three [ __ ] in front of me a [ __ ] let me get 5,000 won [ __ ] behind them like cheap and making every kid [ __ ] [ __ ] behind him like sheer [ __ ] they could give me a whole ten bands [ __ ] look at me I might let me get a chance so I can sit with them [ __ ] cuz they bout to have a good ass time I probably sit right where ever the funniest oh my lord 300 Abhisit just as far away enough away so they don't know that I'm not with them [ __ ] [ __ ] know on that day section imma leave the bump on the strip club I get so many lap dances off them [ __ ] my jeans gonna be a different color like how much you spend $20 I think I was with the Palmas oh yeah they play too much in my heyday one last time I went to kod they had a little lady that was a stripper yeah she climbed all the way up to the ceiling seeing all the way down real fast and Ian stopped right before she hit the floor like whoa I'm so glad then little lady slow cuz there would have killed me yeah this is the home like the lady your siblings in Miami be all on the roof and [ __ ] y'all bus got some good ass health insurance in my head because God [ __ ] be swinging off the roof swinging each other up like look at this [ __ ] you can always tell who he's working out any pre-gaming was it what you got in the white bag this thing you got to got down so baby shower babe bitmap be no goddamn building we're gonna tell you didn't know he get they got us some gingers here they got us some t-shirts let's see what the teachers say we [ __ ] with gifts say what the Legree they say Empress don't even trip would that mean what the [ __ ] what do that what do Emperor's don't even trip me you know what a woman that doesn't let her key is struggle a woman that doesn't let her kid see the side of struggle so they go the sight of struggle so are you one of the kids [ __ ] what you do he didn't make it a get a plea you you her boyfriend that's your fiancee I've had but the buck I'd like you to meet though a gentleman so Oh for real that's what it is well Empress the woman who doesn't let her key is see the sight of struggle my momma was not one of those women all right we so struggle like a [ __ ] I love her but we struggle so you so stand in the hood yeah when you go outside just close your eyes we're gonna Rachel we're struggling we in between lessons right wait no purple you happy we just waiting on God to move a few things around you you grow up realize tonight right extra for who who are poor here look at [ __ ] don't even make no noise they just like oh look the white dude you grew up or a white dude grew up poor yah grew up extra poor poor poor white people poor is different y'all [ __ ] be whoo that's a shame you know wasted your whiteness like this how did you be born happy now clothes but y'all clothes shitty deal on that one hey Kobe lady right there every night fog light just peeled himself she's sleepy as hell she holding her head like she owned a third shift she had to work late at night oh what's that white man you don't walk down here okay he's got whiter he is gonna walk out here with a bag like a throw started what the shirt say self-pay fam you gave me what self pay fam entertainment that's a record label you either type of phrase you need when they're go for photoshoot now you know what they told a man take your put their cracker down there give me got damn certain put that crackle sell paint here teeth crack that knuckle he said it's not buying it's my friends it's my homeboys this is my guys man we [ __ ] own it right salute all the independent rappers in here all the [ __ ] they got their own racket leg we're trying to get this [ __ ] off the ground I keep keep grab keep doing your [ __ ] [ __ ] you know man makes it [ __ ] move got some dope ass rappers I'm a real what's with a fro [ __ ] well you look like one of twins that dance like this ah look like one the les twins in this [ __ ] didn't care you got a what you can see oh come on sash oh wow cordon bleu ever think I think I'll know who he in high school musical I know you right come on boo let's call it blue right there come on [ __ ] up hey come in this way are we doing it like skiing [ __ ] look at your own days are from Asia for the Wawa you can say to you want you ready cordon bleu more bad days oh but that's the thing what's your name if y'all gonna sing y'all gotta sing a [ __ ] [ __ ] there we tell you to sing about so what's your name y'all follow me on instagram X you good yeah what's your name my name is Venus I go by alright now what you got insane negative Man all right I got a couple courses back see some support comes another [ __ ] so absolutely y'all some supporting [ __ ] I I'm just tired of your Mustangs come on man that's good we got him right there ain't saying man we we got caught in blue of mine you can use them yeah go ahead what the [ __ ] is there what the [ __ ] is this [ __ ] represent my a Mitchell poohbear saw this [ __ ] represent Miami now no [ __ ] don't be coming they're trying to cast no spells on us you say what the [ __ ] yeah this [ __ ] trying to cast spells on the so Native American chant yes would spit that make it a super couples hey but you come off okay Joe Pursuit of Happyness look at this man I'm mad as a [ __ ] bout that even the Cuban is mad about that what if I was aiming gonna be a cry for help well we gotta kick your hands for this [ __ ] he beat his ass whoopin it that was [ __ ] up how's the bush you walk you hear me you took your talents to South Beach with that there you go we got the lovely Miss danger from the Waffle House is about to sing a song you better rippin say for the Waffle House beat you just wrote it like way earlier today I remember the first time I saw your face hold up hold up butterflies when I looked into your eyes [Music] keep it a baby I promise you it's worth my way baby take it slow [Music] we gonna take it shut up [ __ ] but we better do something [Music] hey I said I just want an all-star special from you hey I got this morning all-star special from you don't you don't are special from you waffles and toast too [Music] [Applause] [Music] cities you know keyboard easy [Music] but I gotta go home we got father scattered cover I want some juice father scared of cupboard - I want me a waffle I don't want their chocolate chip [ __ ] [ __ ] I want to obscure me and I want [Music] well [Music] [Applause] [Music] there we go Vegas No [Music] [Applause] [Music] your booty grew slow now you see why your booty grew slow it's gone bro some [Music] purple evils love her booty Bruce love Oh Oh [Applause] we are the anybody I'll show her booty Bruce love in see work at the Waffle House butter booties like a pancake [Music] trying to get back to the parking lot of [ __ ] we gotta take a picture yeah so four thousand tickets in this [ __ ] so get up on your feet get up on your feet take your phones out man so we can show the world how Miami turns up Miami get up we go being mugged I'd give it up for DC jump live one more time ima and give it up for Carlos Miller one more time Miami we love y'all this is that anybody I'll show the bonus podcast the Duke genes of comedy make sure you tell somebody what you seen here tonight we love y'all Miami we got Navy biceps your man up in here I got my man Dee klaxon the keys in class due south [Music] yeah pumping antique glass on the drums I got my Road dog that zoo got nude for my please that was cut suit in Miami y'all know Hey Miami bleep [Music] Miami Beach if you have VIP meet-and-greet tickets damn you see right here in the front if you already purchase your VIP meet-and-greet tickets come down to the front right hitter Miami we love y'all make sure you go on youtube today deep eyes I'll show anybody I saw on Twitter Instagram and Facebook tell somebody you seen the new Kings of Comedy Chico fiend Carlos Miller and DC young fly we sold out the James L nights it away appreciate y'all let me get on the same if you laugh at BB three tickets make sure you come down to the front you guys can stay seated in the front if you have VIP tickets [Music] if you're happy I beat me three tickets make sure you stay in your seat [Music] [Applause] [Music] [Music] [Music] [Laughter] crazy SAP buy you a bottle of my soul three two one to [Music] oh gee to three two fam on deck you might stand right here look all right here we go babe and three three this purpose we know st. Paul I've got to do [Music] do [Music] [Applause] [Music] we go to one [Music]

Channel: The 85 South Comedy Show

Views: 5,122,134

Rating: 4.8443861 out of 5

Keywords: nigerian, comedy, dcyoungfly, karlousmiller, mtv2, wildnout, podcast, chicobean, kevinhart

Id: emrbJTOkmJI

Length: 121min 44sec (7304 seconds)

Published: Fri Dec 20 2019