The Story of Professor Von Yipp

well out of all the side characters that appeared in legends of runterra if there is one i didn't expect to get their own story it would be professor phonyip and yet here we are staring at a really long story telling the tale of this person which only further supplements all the story they got through their cards up until now it was never directly confirmed whether professor von yip is the person or the cat but that changes today because that's exactly what this story is about and so without further ado let's dive into the story called to her the cat be wary especially if you own a cat this is a really good story the story begins in the professor's messy and white-haired covered laboratory where he flipped a switch that lit up the place for just a moment enough to show his impish grin he was getting ready to show everyone what he's truly capable of apparently everyone thought he was annoying and disappointing and that all his inventions were just expensive paperwork well he was ready to change that he tried to flip the second switch but it stuck a little probably from when muchka his fluffy cat spilled coffee all over it it took him three tries before successfully pulling it down as the low hum started vibrating through the laboratory the professor explains that none of the others at the university of beltover's engineering department knew how difficult it was to climb the ladder of academia without the support of a wealthy family and yet here he was overcoming a massive disadvantage after flipping the third switch his machine which he worked on for so many years now was ready for the second phase but before that was initiated the professor noticed that muchka was missing she was supposed to be strapped into her chair after crawling across the entire place he finally found his truest white-haired companion curled up under the bed just outside of his reach here the story revealed that muchka was always there with the professor she listened and supported him whenever he had to rant about his colleagues and in return all she ever asked for was to get fed on time the professor's voice softened when he grabbed muchka and tried to put her back in her chair at first she wiggled a bit and so he offered her a treat first she threw it on the ground as her usual pre-eating ritual after which she gone down and so the professor strapped her into the chair and attached a small metal cap onto her head on the other side of the machine buzzing with excitement the professor strapped himself into a similar harness with his own metal cap covered with hex crystals he had spent almost a decade researching them and finding ones with the right resonance power and intensity with proper funding he could have finished his work three years ago but without it he had to do all the hextech research himself after this the professor practiced for the time he would demonstrate this machine to dean zvopalit and so he explained that after pulling the last lever he would prove that minds were not rooted in bodies at all that brain was merely a housing for the mind and identity and everyone would see how wrong they were about him it would be the time professor andrei von yip would be appreciated and so with his heart pounding he pulled the lever he felt a jolt travel through his body as his eyes rolled back in his head muchka's whale rang in his ears and then he blinked adjusting to a new brightness at first he wondered if he accidentally turned the lights on then he wondered if he had lost consciousness he wondered how much time had passed then he noticed the horrible smell fun yip's nose twitched and so he sneezed three times but it sounded different it was an adorable tiny sneeze fon yip looked down at his hands no his paws muchka's paws he had done it he tried to say but it came out as a satisfied burr haha he realized he can now make cat sounds touching his fuzzy little face with his new boss fonyip laughed rather he chittered in the light he had successfully switched his bodies with he suddenly recognized the smell it was smoke he used his paws to remove his tiny metal cap only to realize that several of the gems began to melt and sizzle into steam what's worse they were irreplaceable many of them were one of pieces that couldn't be recreated and so he quickly had to swap their bodies back before the crystals were destroyed thankfully phone ip installed a second tiny lever on the cat's side too but when he tried to pull it with his paws it held fast he tried using more force he even got out of his harness and used his full weight but the lever was metal and slippery and he couldn't hold onto it without the cap slipping off tread he meowed this would be so much easier to operate with thumbs that's when he realized his other body still had thumbs and so he men out at muchka to see if she could understand him in response she just screamed back she strained against the harness in panic then in phone yip's voice muchka shouted that she wanted to get out she didn't want to be there the professor was amazed by how quickly muchka picked up on using human language he meowed at her that she can release herself by pressing the middle button hoping she would understand him muchka looked down and bent over it seemed like she tried to bite the button but her new human body wasn't flexible enough so she shouted at phone yip to do it himself phoney jumped onto her lap and pressed the button at least he was glad to know that she could understand him after releasing her muchka fell on the ground trying to figure out how human limbs work the professor then quickly jumped back into his seat and he told muchka to help him with the liver but she didn't want to she wanted to stay where she was phony pissed at her but before he could do anything else he looked up and noticed the crystals had completely melted it took him a moment to realize that now he was stuck in the body of a cat but what was even worse after looking at muchka who was trying and failing to crawl under the bed he realized that she was stuck in his a wave of catastrophizing anxiety washed over him which resulted in him vomiting a disgusting hairball everyone would now know that fon yip was an idiot after all instead of changing the course of history he turned himself into a cat soon without a way to earn a living he would lose his apartment and spend his life on the streets as a stray cat hunting the mice of zorn in his mind there was no way forward that's when muchka screamed as loud as she could phony began to panic had his body been hurt would he lose an arm a leg an eye would there be anything left to return to one day he sprinted to muchka jumped on her chest and asked what was wrong muchka stopped screaming she looked fun yip dead in the eye and shouted hungry hungry the professor asked not sure whether to be relieved or angry you're screaming because you're hungry dead body wasn't hungry the last time i was in it i'm wasting away muchka wailed skin and bone starved close to death funyip quickly calmed her down it was middle of the night and he really didn't want anyone to pay him a visit now fun yip tried to explain that she can't get food just by screaming but muchka was confused it has always worked so why wouldn't it work now phoneip tried to tell her that usually he was the one feeding her but muchka interrupted him dying underfed never had a single bite of food in all my life thankfully the professor remembered he still had some pastry in his pocket so muchka shoved her hand in the pocket and somehow without using her fingers properly she pried it out and let it fall down then phone yip was forced to watch his own body eat it off the ground he realized that despite muchka having a human body she still behaved like a cat it was a vindication of his theory though he wished he could enjoy it more in two days he had a meeting with the dean and he would have to appear before her as normal as could be and try to convince her to give him more money he knew he couldn't repair his machine in time so he would have to propose a new project something that would make his transformation seem deliberate designed to show off his genius in a unique and creative manner it would be a challenge but not impossible he just needed to help muchka act like a human during the meeting and to hope that dean zwopalit was in a good mood after watching muchka try to bury the rest of the pastry in the cold concrete phony told her he knew where to get more though she would have to listen to him not like that time he tried to teach her how to use a toilet and just as he said that he realized sooner or later he would have to teach muchka how to use a toilet there was a moment of silence before muchka replied i'm still hungry the story then cuts to the day fon yip had a meeting with the dean the professor and muchka were at the university tower but that place had some special rules such as the damage caused by a professor can be justified depending on how good their invention is but also unfortunately no animals were allowed in the area and out of all the people dean swappalit was the one who insisted upon that rule originally phoney wanted to let muchka smuggle him inside the university under a coat but he didn't own a coat and letting muchka come here alone was out of question so even though muchka couldn't even remember simple phrases such as lovely weather today isn't it or please or not knocking over mugs filled with hot coffee they still had no other option than to just march in with fun yip sitting on muchka's shoulder the moment they reached the first door phone yip asked muchka if she remembers how to open doors she replied no and so he told her to use her thumbs to which muchka replied she didn't like thumbs they felt weird so instead she used the palms of both of her hands to twist the knob and get inside there muchka didn't like how many students walked around but thankfully by now phonyib told her not to scream when she was displeased so instead she just whispered too many people i don't like it phony told her that she would have to walk through them and he assured her that none of them will step on her tail and they didn't though muchka was still uncomfortable so she drew herself high and hissed phony ip reminded her that people don't hiss it didn't take long and after phone yip's constant loud meowing the students cleared the halls because they knew animals were against the rules and they didn't want to be present when the dean got angry finally they found the dean's office and stepped inside dean zwopalit was sitting behind her desk going through some papers she asked phony ip what he wanted to talk about but she immediately froze when she looked up phone ip could see sign of angry and explosive lecturing on her face and so he whispered to muchka to tell her she looks well rested but instead muchka leaned over the desk blinked slowly and told her would you like a pastry phony feared that would be the sentence muchka would remember with calm voice dean swapalit said close the door now as soon as the door was shut phony ip braced himself for the yelling but instead he felt himself being lifted from muchka's shoulder he panicked and started wiggling he wasn't sure if the dean was going to throw him out the window but when he looked up he saw the biggest smile he had ever seen the dean then asked who is this little girl there was a moment of silence before fon yip told muchka to tell her his name and so muchka replied phon yip the dean shook her head and replied only you would name a cat after yourself andrei phony then told muchka to tell her her name and so much quickly said oh muchka that's when it became obvious why the dean did not allow any animals in the campus she would have to cuddle them all and it was embarrassing the dean then told fonhip to not tell anyone about this and then they got to the matter at hand she knew phony wanted more funds but she simply didn't have time to argue back phoniep told muchka to listen to him and repeat exactly what he said and so with phony ips frantic meows on muchka's shoulder they were able to have a conversation with the dean with muchka repeating every word phonyib tried to argue that he had been at the university for 13 years but the dean told him that he had not done much in this time however there was a way to make the university interested in investing in him he could teach a class phony agreed that he could do that if he had the time to repair but the dean told him that professor bunz who was teaching first-year students had to unexpectedly leave and so he would have to take his class of course fonyip hated children and after he had a little monologue about these first year imbeciles muchka whispered to him if she should also tell the dean about how much he hates children instead phanib told her that he will take the class swapalit was glad to hear that and she told him that the class is in room 217 he better hurry phoney was shocked to hear that the class starts right now but the dean replied that it was just intro to hexographs even muchka could teach it the story then cuts to muchka trying to hold a piece of choke between her poems it was all going to be excruciating during their introduction while telling everyone phone would be their professor for the semester muchka didn't even know how to say the word semester and she didn't even know how to write letters so funny told her to copy the shapes he was drawing with his paws he traced out his name on the desk letter by letter muchka stare the gears visibly turning in her head as she wrote a gross approximation of professor von yip on the board chalk held between her poems this took six full minutes thankfully none of the students noticed the professor couldn't write because they were all staring at the cat after a while a student stood up saying that she wanted to let professor phoniep know where professor buntz left off and so phonyib let the student recite from her notebook as she did that a bit later the student asked if the professor was even listening von yip looked to the side and saw muchka trying to curl into a ball on the ground head down in her hands she wondered how could people sleep when their back was so not flexible after phony yelled at her she replied she was resting her eyes she said this loudly so that the students could all hear she said that if they were so boring that they would make her fall asleep they would get a failing grade phonyb didn't think this was the worst approach to teaching and so muchka continued yeah you'll get a failing grade with his enhanced hearing phon yib heard what the students were mumbling about they knew this class was difficult but they wondered if this was some kind of a test there had to be a reason for this they thought that maybe fenib was trying to teach them to present better so that they could get funding for their experiments and so the next time the student continued reading from her notebook she did it with bigger hand motions and metaphors after the student finished muchka opened her eyes and thanked her for explaining well at phonyib's command much couldn't send the students home there was supposed to be a full hour of lecture but none of the students mentioned it after they had all left muchka whined that she was hungry again she wanted to go home so phony agreed he hopped onto her shoulder as she bumped into yet another wall he wondered how long they could keep this up the story then cuts to a few weeks later while he himself had a hard time adjusting to the life of a cat he noticed that over time while muchka was still a cat her attention span and level of care seemed to have gone up and now she could even pronounce some of the more difficult terminology with phonybib's help muchka explained that her awkward movement was the result of a summer injury she also seemed to enjoy giving their students caustic feedback whenever they answered incorrectly and phony wondered if this progress was because her mind was in a human brain and whether the brain structure does actually affect the mind he was still trying to figure out how to reveal himself to his colleagues but until that right moment they still had to pretend everything was normal and muchka always found ways to make this more difficult at this point her nails were disgustingly long and filthy so fonyeep told her to cut them muchka wondered why couldn't she just scratch things until they fell off and phoniep explained that human nails didn't work like that she would be left with bunch of bleeding fingers muchka thought that the right solution to that would be to not cut them then at first phoney told her that the students would soon complain about her hygiene but knowing well this argument wouldn't help he also added that she would go to jail muchka answered okay because she didn't know what jail was phoney compared it to the harness of his machine which she hated so much muchka rolled her eyes she didn't care about going to jail because even if she did she would just wiggle out of it like she always did phony ip was starting to get a headache he sped out that jail is not something she can wiggle out of she would go there for not trimming her nails and the wardens would give her food she didn't like muchka told him she would cry but funip answered they wouldn't care much continued that he always cared when she cried but phony replied that's because she was a cat now that she was a human she wasn't cute anymore muchka gasped eyes wide evidently this was a revelation to her because she was in his body she wasn't cute and so she couldn't do whatever she wanted anymore muchka stared into the distance brow throughout in thought phony wondered if he had gone too far but she needed to realize there are different rules for when she was cute and tiny and fluffy you might be less powerful in some ways but in other ways you called all the shots an interesting thought phone nip realized muchka walked through a machine and in the middle parts she saw her own reflection she felt hideous and she wanted phoniep to change her back phony told her that he couldn't do that they didn't have the right crystals so she had to listen to him if she wanted to avoid going to jail fine she huffed i'll trim my nails and wash your hair with water we didn't agree to that this was going to be a long night a month later the dean's calendar finally opened up so muchka and phone ip once again visited her office i have heard some reports from your students dean swapalitz said but muchka changed the subject she and phonyib had been rehearsing this speech for a full week now i hope you have seen that i am committed to this university she said in one go and now i feel i deserve the funding for a new project of mine she took a deep gasping breath so if you would be so kind to give me your step of approval dean told them to slow down she had no idea what they were saying muchka looked to phone yip for approval he gave her a small node i hope she began going as slowly as she could you have seen that enough the dean looked annoyed from your midterm reviews it sounds like things are going reasonably well a few complaints but it's just an intro level class no one really cares so long there's a warm body up front it's basically babysitting phoney put me out his agreement now you've mentioned you want funding for a new project much knowledge the dean was glad to hear that after tinkering with the theory of mind machine for so long he admitted to defeat it was a foolish attempt anyway all he had to do was to sign some paperwork to get the funding thankfully the two had been practicing writing with muchka following the lines fon hip made with his paw she wasn't good but at least it was legible now even so it had taken weeks to fill out the paperwork by hand as the clacking keys of typograph scared muchka and gave phone yip migraines but now with all the paperwork done the dean told phoney there was one more step to do he would have to find some graduate students to work on his new project and thankfully she had a very tall stack of folders with their personal information but she warned phonip that most of the good ones had already been taken the story then cuts to the day phony was going to meet the students who could potentially work on his project he didn't have an office at the university so now he was sitting in an unused room which used to be a lavatory the room was so small he couldn't fit a desk and a person inside at the same time so the interviews took place with the students sitting in the middle of the doorway throughout these interviews it all came down to the most important question phonyib told muchka ask her about a time when completing the experiment was more important than following protocol or ethical standards so far everyone gave the wrong answer just like the young woman before them now she answered never an experiment that doesn't follow protocol is one where the results can easily be called into question and i strive to funny but didn't listen to the rest he knew she was out but he let muchka finish the interview and kindly inform her that they would let her know within two weeks whether she got the position the young woman shrugged seemingly no longer interested before she stood to leave after her muchka pushed the next file towards funip it was the last one and then they would go get pastries at the back of his mind phony was worried about his body muchka lacked proper nutrition and her human body was beginning to look palliate and undernourished anyway fun deep paused when he noticed the file contained two names it seemed like they accidentally booked two people at once moments later the two men stepped before phony eve's door one of them with a long face and a thick moustache the other with big sideburns and a mug of steaming tea the mustachioed one remained standing while the man with the sideburns took a seat muchka looked at them and wanted to let them know that they had made a mistake but the sitting man interrupted her telling her they haven't the two were a package deal jakub and natia's batadel the interview went as usual until they got to the most important part tell me about the time when completing the experiment was more important than following protocol or ethical standards muchka said the two brothers glanced at each other then jakub cleared his throat but nothing else was the one who answered there was a part we needed that was not available anywhere in piltover so we got it elsewhere muchka replied that it doesn't sound like a breach of protocol but jakub said quietly it was chemtech phony yip blinked kem tech came from zorn and it was not well regarded in built-over no matter where it appeared it always made all inventions unstable or if not more unstable it certainly made unstable machines more dangerous what in the world did they need camtech for fon yip wondered aloud muchka asked the question and jakub shrugged we were creating something that we wanted only one person to be able to operate we were investigating what makes each person unique and how much a person can change while remaining themselves when the interview ended before mucha could tell them the standard will be in touch phonyib told her to tell them they've got the job muchka looked at the brothers considering as nathias took another sip of a tea she locked eyes with him and asked how is your drink he blinked in surprise as he put down the mug it's good he said but it's a little cold now i'll probably just without breaking eye contact muchka slowly pushed the muck off the side of the desk it fell on the ground and shattered these spilling all over the floor fon yip amused by this improvised test watched the brothers to see how they would respond to such behavior from a professor neither jacob nor nathia's better than i you've got the job muchka said jakub not it and what is the job i'll tell you more when we get our approvals the story then cuts to muchka and phonyib being in the dean's office the dean seemed annoyed apparently the butterdale brothers were nearly suspended last year and they weren't allowed to sign up for the more advanced courses but thankfully for phone ip that meant they had more time to work on his project on the other side the dean was frustrated because fond yip was supposed to have the full description of his new project ready by now this is when another problem arrived as the dean was talking with every wave of her hand the sunlight from the window behind her reflected off of her watch phonip's cad body really wanted to chase the light but he was able to resist the urge muchka on the other side kept following the dot with her gaze not paying attention to the conversation at all the dean tried to follow muchka's eyes to see what she was looking at but she quickly gave up then the dean said that phonip comes here again and again begging for funds for a project that will change everything and yet he couldn't even give her his full attention muchka tried to reply but her thoughts trailed off with the dot of light that's when the dean snapped now she actually believed that phony ip was mad she was tired of funneling his ego driven projects and seeing nothing come off it no usable data or even salvageable discoveries on top of that now he shrouded his ideas in mystery in her eyes phony thought that the drama of a reveal is more important than proper oversight so she told him it is not funny could feel the growl begin in the back of his throat and before he knew it he lunged claws outstretched toward the dean muchka blinked back into reality just long enough to restrain him the dean sniffed you'll need to get rid of your cat what mucha replied while the dean thought the cat was cute bringing her here was still an obvious sign of disrespect phony was furious now and if he had his own human body he would be throwing things it was all so unfair how could he show his true potential when he was suppressed at every step by an unwilling dean he extended a single claw and scratched at the desk keep your animal off my desk sloppily tricked as she lifted from the ip's cat body by the scruff of the neck this is an antique it it the dean was silenced by what she saw into the lacquered wood fon yip had carved i-m-v he no longer cared if he gave the game away so his colleagues would know what had happened and he would be laughed out of the university fine at least the dean would have to go to work every day and see how wrong she was about him when she sat down at this desk he knew what he was doing his machines worked and worked beautifully how dare she talk about things she knew nothing about phony was a genius he knew it in his tiny cat bones if only he had been able to finish writing his name she started it and stared and stared from yip she said softly a cloud moved in front of the sun freeing muchka from the bouncing lights beautiful tyranny dean swappel it you didn't tell me that you were working on animal intelligence she squealed no wonder much has been accompanying you everywhere uh what else can she do funny was taken aback by this sudden turn but he'd be damned if she let this go to waste muchka ask me what 52 x 21 is uh muchka what is 52 times 21 taking pleasure in destroying the dean's desk further fun yip carved 1092 into it the dean gasped and clasped her hands why this is remarkable andre we've been trying and failing to enhance animal intelligence for years but you she paused and looked at the human in front of her you've done something no one else could and with a dramatic reveal no less i was i was wrong about you she extended her hand for a handshake muchka stared at it unsure what to do shake her hand you've seen me do it before muchka slept her poem against the deans still refusing to use her thumb to make a firm grip now said dean swapolit none plus as she sat behind her desk once again let's talk funding just like we have practiced hold the pencil follow the movements of my paw and replicate what i'm doing now i'll try muchka had already lost several pencils under the bed but fenib did not feel like fishing them out for her it took hours of careful sketching erasing and restarting but eventually muchka had produced a reasonable approximation of what they needed to build fon yip looked at it with pride with her help with the dean's funding with the battle's brother's assistance phony would show them all what a real scientist could do and these blueprints would be the first step toward making that reality cue the dramatic reveal the catastrophe exosuit animal intelligence indeed what a story first of all i didn't expect phonyib to get his own story let alone expect that this would definitely be among my top three stand-alone stories if you really think about it this entire story is depressing because based on the cards we got in legends of rondera we know that phony won't figure out how to swap their bodies back and something will probably go wrong with his suit and because cats usually live up to only 18 years he is quickly running out of time and that's why he is forced to artificially prolong his life with augments on top of that the story hinted at the fact that fon yip is losing his humanity and he is becoming more and more cat-like while muchka is taking over his body and because this story revealed that fond yip was actually a decently nice person it's that much sadder to see him fall towards the darker side overall i really hope we get more stories about him this character has insane potential and while i still don't think that phony yip will be the next champion i still wish he will become a champion at some point you

Channel: Necrit

Views: 152,192

Keywords: Lore, Story, Necrit, Necrit94, Narrated, Explained, League of Legends, LOL, TFT, Teamfight tactics, legends of runeterra, Von Yipp, Batadel, Piltover, Zaun, LoR, Cards, Character

Id: M6cLBBbIIzc

Length: 32min 53sec (1973 seconds)

Published: Sun May 02 2021