THE CREW IN THE TRAP | 85 SOUTH SHOW PODCAST | 07.07.23

foreign [Music] [Music] what the [ __ ] is that I don't think he finishes yet no he that's he playing that [ __ ] then he went to sleep then he went to sleep then he went to sleep yeah when was making the beat then he went to sleep then he went to sleep then he went to sleep I said no Chico you might be wrong it sounds like he made this [ __ ] on a cellular phone that needs to be plugged in on 20 and was like when I get home mama finish this [ __ ] is going hard you hear the claps you hear the snares I'm gonna put something right there yeah yeah I'm a leader in space and I'ma fill it in with some [ __ ] at my place when I get it on that she gonna be on I'm probably gonna play that [ __ ] do a microphone and it's gonna be lit when I balance it out and put the [ __ ] that be missing in that [ __ ] now hey Jay oh man made the beat is so player he recorded this [ __ ] on a Motorola Razor that's why you can't hit a base coming through the speaker hey get this [ __ ] finished the tweak it up she go that [ __ ] already sounding lean he made this [ __ ] on answering machine damn that's crazy as hell he made it on the Etch A Sketch [ __ ] and I can tell no that sounds so swear it's like he recorded on his phone and left it on his own voicemail yeah man I ain't no hater but this is sound great on a eight-track player and yeah but let me have it cause imma make it harder he made this [ __ ] on a calculator he got from his daughter [Laughter] hey man he made this [ __ ] on a microwave screen on a microwave he just kept hitting the eight in the 116. Chico when I said you gonna swear I'm a liar he made this [ __ ] on a goddamn airplane we leave you alone he made this [ __ ] on a rotary phone nah I heard what you say he put it on that phone new one you got the pain I hadn't heard it before he made this [ __ ] on the bottom at the liquor store huh [Music] is that a horn now [ __ ] that's a flute he made this [ __ ] at the grocery store over by the fruit yeah uh tweaker he made this [ __ ] on the Walmart loudspeaking you think that I'm wrong he made this beat on a walk man with one headphone [Laughter] oh [ __ ] oh man yes indeed we're in this [ __ ] man we in this [ __ ] we are in this [ __ ] like if this yes that's how we yes yeah yes indeed it's 2023 there's 85 way Studio but this also is the womb because we hitting this [ __ ] oh [Music] with me today because they got their legs out and [ __ ] just got the air fixed in this [ __ ] so it's frosty in here yeah it's real good yeah I feel you y'all ain't dressed for the occasion that's the job you want I'm just telling the people so they don't think I condone this type of [ __ ] how y'all boys feeling man how you feeling what you mean how you feeling what you mean how you feeling like I don't try to stay out my feelings ain't no money over there that wasn't what I was asking I'd be reading regular [ __ ] in my mind I feel so real so Trill like the recipient of a scholarship out of poverty [Music] yeah deep yeah that's mean right there yeah scholarship out of poverty living how I want to yeah doing what you want to when I want to being where you want to be how I want to be there however you want to be there that's it how you feel ain't gonna answer the oldest on camera he think he better oh yeah I'm Otis and uh and I'm not ashamed to admit it there you go I'm a player there you go said that [ __ ] like he was on one of them commercials but they said now a word for my satisfied customer I'm feeling [ __ ] motivated because I watch y'all [ __ ] on Netflix last night you know we watch History God damn it [Applause] [Music] [Applause] before we are shooting a special and you is doing your only fans content on stage I'm trying to get somebody shake shake shake shake shake shake shake shake make the whole crap shake shake shake shake shake shake my daddy had me six to one where he net it bro when nobody in there with me you this is easy Shake I'm through smoking weed that [ __ ] ain't got too strong why you say that because I was high the other day I ordered a pregnancy pillow we wanted to lay between the legs that ain't really a bad idea I'm at home taking naps like I'm 10 months [Music] cause it was on the dream I used to read Word Up Magazine salt and pepper and Heavy D all in the limousine yeah hanging pictures of my wall every Saturday it was a rap attack Mr Magic Molly Mall I let my take Rock to my date pop come on man I mean I kept playing my tape until he didn't play no more till it broke come on man and you could always tell when your tape about to break that's just ugly slow down a little bit yeah and that [ __ ] didn't pop that was upset that was the saddest I remember I was trying to not never forget but I was trying to catch this one uh uh Avant uh separator first came out and you know how they put me a song on the radio man I heard the tail end of it and I was like what is that [ __ ] I said at the radio all day waiting to press play and record at the same time to record this song it was like midnight they finally played that [ __ ] again I hit recording the tape pop name there I was sick what year that was because I ain't had no problem I didn't use the CD you was recording [ __ ] off the radio on the CD no I'm saying yeah he was born during the burning CD era yeah no wait what yes I would DVD my dad was a DVD man but that don't mean you didn't listen today see that [ __ ] tricked me what I'm treating me I thought that [ __ ] was you know I'm 35 bro that ain't young that ain't old right in the middle right yeah you're right yeah you ain't in the middle yeah you just this your first year of officially being grown all right yeah that's what it is yeah oh damn I thought I was growing the whole time what was I no you were an adult now you're a grown-ass man at 35 yeah I know I was because I had done I hadn't got me laugh for my birthday on Thursday and [ __ ] and I just offered her 50 she ain't even want it I was like man look go get you something to eat man you said you ain't got you a little what little ass okay and you just gave her 50. after we were done you put a ten dollar 25 year old is what you have done that yeah I'd ask her for some money [Laughter] Duality [ __ ] that it's all about growth yeah and that's where you say how I feel I feel like [ __ ] been [ __ ] the whole time explain look how this [ __ ] happened you was there you know how it happened in my modern people who's telling us it wasn't gonna happen the way that it happened right and then it happened even bigger than they said how it wasn't going to happen right like we succeeded harder than they thought we were going to fail that is irrelevant but to hear that [ __ ] in real life and know that it was already inaccurate when I was hearing it where I was hearing it and who I was hearing it from it's like no because you don't even get it I've already know it works I was working it but now we get to show the world why it worked why they love it and how like people don't know when they don't when there's some it's nothing to compare it to right I agree I mean I think that was the biggest thing I think that it was the as far as the journey it was the newness and the the unconventional nature of what we was doing you were here like you know how people talk about how it's never been done before but when something's never been done before people don't know how to receive it so hold on let's see that's why I got to backtrack right now first of all I'm grateful and thankful and I'm appreciative you know if you don't say that people think that you don't mean that right you know what I'm saying but that's that's given already they don't know what it you know those moments of trying to get this [ __ ] right and figuring it out so I appreciate the opportunity to do what we do because they could have just easily not [ __ ] with it too yeah but I think that even if I don't think that it was an option of not [ __ ] with it because we [ __ ] with it so hard and that comes through you know what I mean like I think that when people see what we do I think that it's a reflection of what we are putting out like his energy is real right and the energy we put out and have been putting out has been consistent so now I got like we were saying earlier like the game has shifted to where it's Netflix now right but you know 10 years ago everybody was still trying to get on HBO and buying for that but the energy was the same people were trying to put out something that they would gravitate towards but we decided to put out something that we wanted people to [ __ ] with and the whatever the machine is no matter what it ships to it have to come to us because people the people made what we do what it is you know what I'm saying it's for black people anyway all the way you know what I'm saying but it's for all people and I think this and that's what's so dope about it is everybody gets to see and form their own opinion right you know I mean that's the beautiful part I love this [ __ ] like I can ask like because we'd have been in the game together from the jump like there's something that always keep me in in I guess if you want to use humble as a word but like I always think if somebody would have told us when we was walking up and down you know Times Square trying to send fifty dollars home Western Union then one day we'll be sitting here would you have believed it I feel I mean you know how my mindset is I was like yeah of course what else though you get what I'm saying because even at that time I already knew that was going to be a phase two like that wasn't like it didn't take us long to realize that even that opportunity wasn't as what it was presented it's like oh oh okay it don't just happen like that yeah it had to hit the ground running right but I said it's that's why I don't answer the question where you see yourself in the next five years because because it might take you five more weeks to blow up exactly yeah and it's like I never limit myself to what my mind can drum up because if you'd have asked me that when I was an open Micah at the comedy zone in Greensboro I wouldn't have named half of the [ __ ] I've done already right I wouldn't even have been able to dream up what God has put into my life that I've already accomplished God and people too I don't think people get enough credit in what regard because you like in the come up doing comedy for [ __ ] damn near 10 years straight before you even do like anything major that you feel like is a project you know what I'm saying like on a major platform when those people build you up and they tell you that [ __ ] and they motivate you and they keep you going all the people who say positive [ __ ] who believe in you who just run up on you that you've never seen that you didn't even know where knew who the [ __ ] you were those people push you to another level too because you get that confirmation affirmation that you've got good [ __ ] that you have you know what I mean that they [ __ ] with you whatever it is like even if you did some [ __ ] that's small and local and you posted it and it got a thousand views when you run into 800 of them people who literally watch that [ __ ] North Carolina what Chico said he knows it leave me up there get your tickets that's the Bull City right here stop they don't like it no [Music] no put it in there come on tell him to come to the show July 15 so they don't think we left y'all better show up today you see what she said July 15th Durham North Carolina North Carolina you said North Carolina this episode is sponsored by bluetooth fellas come on man it's summertime it's a hot girl summer man these girls ain't gonna get no hotter you know what I'm saying so if you're trying to heat up the bedroom you know what I'm saying trying to set that thing to play get you a Bluetooth increase your performance and give you the extra confidence in the bedroom you know what I'm saying if you a hot boy you trying to get up right you trying to get up on the hot girls they beating us right now man they they doing they doing too much snap back with the Bluetooth you understand what I'm saying bluetooth.com consult with one of their licensed medical providers and once you're approved you'll receive your prescription within days Bluetooth wants to help you have better sex discover your options at bluetooth.com chew it and then go do it man and we've got a special deal for our listeners try Bluetooth free when you use the promo code 85 South at checkout just pay five dollars shipping that's bluetooth.com promo code 85 South to receive your first month free visit bluetooth.com for more important details and important safety information and we thank Bluetooth for sponsoring the podcast I mean that's crazy you say that because I was thinking the other day just you remember that first old school battle we did the reaction that it got like from the last day on the last season now I mean I'm talking about when it actually came not just oh you know what now that you say that the whole entirety of it because on the last day of the last season of the first you know season a while and now we shot we did that just off the top and everybody was like hey man when this [ __ ] hit it's gonna be and we was like all right you know I mean we don't even know if this [ __ ] gonna come out for real but then when it came out you remember you checked the Twitter I had probably about maybe a thousand followers at that time maybe at that may I checked my mentions I had 690 something mentions after that old school battle came out and at that time I was like what the f I never seen no [ __ ] like that before so that was the first time that I had ever seen a response like you was talking about in the masses but that individual like you said them people that come up to you that's been seeing you from the beginning today is so crazy because a lot of those people who would come and watch me at the comedy zone do Open Mic was like hitting me today like man this is so amazing I've been watching you from the beginning man I knew you was going to be something and those people actually did tell me I was going to be something bro I remember I had did a show I want to say in like Dayton Ohio whichever one of them comedy clubs where that [ __ ] looked like you're in the shower Toledo yeah yeah man I'm talking [ __ ] this lady in the front row was like I've been to nine of your shows somebody else was like I've been to 12 of them and then this white dude who was just sitting there I've been about 35 of your shows man who the [ __ ] is that I would never forget this [ __ ] this is you never know who paying attention like who paying attention yeah I don't know that should be crazy because now people like oh [ __ ] we watching it in London yeah but they supposed to been watching it but see people it's it's like that attachment you know I mean you can have something but when when a certain something gets attached to it it's kind of like you know I mean getting your product in Walmart you know I mean you just been selling that [ __ ] I mean hand that's exactly what it's like we're in Walmart we're in Walmart now like it's like you could be it don't matter how good you do it locally nor how many other stores you'd have had your product in once you get in Walmart shooting Walmart I'm in that [ __ ] you know what I mean and that's the thing people understand it's not about how you when you get into a space like that it's not about how much you sell it's about how much they buy I'm watching this [ __ ] every day at me too every day every day I'm gonna watch this [ __ ] even when I'm not watching it and I'm about to go to sleep I got to call somebody from 12 o'clock hitting there wouldn't know what the [ __ ] going on I stayed up at three then and put the subtitles on there so even [ __ ] yeah [Laughter] somewhere somebody reading that [ __ ] hey yo man make sure you put the captions on this [ __ ] man we got some people who can't hear who want it who want to read it and we [ __ ] with them too y'all got some people in Japan watching that [ __ ] captioning Japanese they don't give a [ __ ] they just looking at us and like they are so black they fascinated by how black people yeah they are so [ __ ] black all the way man all the way they love that [ __ ] yeah man it'd be for me it's like the response and seeing how people are receiving something that you know we've been doing for so long and it's like it's always crazy when somebody sees something that you've been doing for years and they react to it like it's never been seen before it hasn't crazy they haven't seen this [ __ ] before but it's but it's it's wild to see people who you would have thought have always been watching it to say man and they came to this it's undeniable when it's in Walmart you know what I'm saying you you can act like you don't see it everywhere else but when you walk in Walmart and see that display you're like [ __ ] y'all I gotta call you man I just seen you yeah haven't watched this [ __ ] on purpose yeah I don't want to see no [ __ ] turn that Law and Order on man I'm tired that's crazy man shout out to all the people who tried to ignore this [ __ ] but you can't you can't man and you can't you can't and that's the beautiful part of it and I and watching it it's like man you know I mean this is a give me some of your favorite 85 South moments period period in the history oh my God when you said that [ __ ] wake up in the morning and fly out the window like a pterodactyl [ __ ] that [ __ ] [Applause] I almost threw up my [ __ ] that uh man is so many bruh it's so many fly as the blow up doll um uh amen me and you as the crackheads you when you said the [ __ ] in New York [Laughter] thank you make them go faster go find that the New York episode man oh my God I mean it's so many songs man uh uh when we was in Macon uh [ __ ] I was watching the toaster episode early I said we had toasted the television to put some toast in the toaster yeah all that that tosa one when you was like man them white then when you got to do hey man please man [Music] I think that was one of the moments that really for us in the moment we realized in that moment like oh we doing some difference yeah right here because because it's never prepared it just break out in song yeah we never knew it like he came from assuming to you know yeah you remember this [ __ ] like the entire crowd that's what that excuse me came from in South Carolina like walking through the crowd bro like there's so many songs like my my it's so many moments that yeah I do a soundtrack like that but it's crazy because there's so many that uh belly [ __ ] and making I'm talking about with all the songs y'all come up with on stage big belly but you think they gonna come off stage and just go remember them she's confident confident uh she's she's command them titties is mine even though that would never we'd ever see that one but that one was classic [Music] we got to celebrate we got to give them some [ __ ] to let them know that Mega 85 South show is on Netflix so I might just have to say welcome back to the 85 South show [Applause] [Music] ER we used to borrow Netflix password [Music] I want the world to see how good we can make a low budget Hood classic [ __ ] we need to make us a little low budget ass movie the call center some with a general ass title you ain't together [Applause] [Music] [Music] [Applause] GB P [Music] together together yeah GED yeah that's it that's three right there the call center up the street and GED that's three that's three we can put out right there all the way mama that's the movie we just looking for Mama we don't know where my man where is Mama Mama and then when you find that then she's like yeah y'all looking for me it took the whole movie [Laughter] everybody start doing a very short films that's hilarious movies yeah what did it oh [Music] I want to do a series of all the [ __ ] your father wasn't doing when he was not being a good father this is what these were some of the best moments of this [ __ ] life unbeknownst to you you missed my birthday party wait a minute Public Enemy when you when you you know I was a rapping 93. hey man it got to go out when you get rid of the Elsa look let me tell you what happened [Laughter] some of these [ __ ] so short all they do is go off [ __ ] all the time my all-time favorite independent movie is who made the potato salad you father who made the potato salad but I would you know it's like before it was that one it was I'm about it I think I'm about it is one of the greatest moves Queen City Charlotte North Carolina we coming to the Bojangles Arena biscuits see how excited she was that's how excited y'all better be July 16 when we come to the cute show you come to the church [Music] July 16th Bojangles Arena come to the show oh [ __ ] okay she gonna be doing thread twisting apocalypse July 16 she gonna do them for you at a discounted prices you get your tickets today like cocoa butter made from scratch team in Charlotte North Carolina books for the kids what's up y'all it's your girl Lex p and it's your girls right in the call and y'all know Orlando we owe y'all so we coming back in a big way August 10th poor Minds is coming to Orlando for our live show yes we coming to Orlando Improv I cannot wait to see all y'all faces you know unfortunately we had to reschedule these days so I'm super excited to come out and see y'all doors open at seven yes and the show starts at eight and we back bigger than ever let me tell y'all y'all should be happy because this show this round is super lit so Orlando August 10th doors open at seven shows starts at eight Orlando Improv we'll see y'all and we outside bookie put it on cause we coming [Music] thank you [Music] foreign [Music] thank you [Music] karate hot boy that [ __ ] would do a karate shut the [ __ ] up he was man he was shot that [ __ ] had a dojo and everything like that [ __ ] first I got the hook up yeah the first I got the hook up baller blocking ball of block it yeah that's your problem uh but but [ __ ] sleep on that [ __ ] sleepover choices I [ __ ] with the choices choices choices what else choices was hard it's the other man it's a DC it's a DC Hood movie and [ __ ] they seated uh Taraji P Henson in it what is it it got Harrison black spring break black spring break is hilarious and he said we'll be over tonight to pick you up in a limo limo you mean limousine tripping a good ass movie yeah that's it three strikes so terrible they good fat Beach fat [ __ ] Classics Shottas you know what the first low budget uh another one that went like the Leprechaun the first Leprechaun Leprechaun in the Hood yeah that [ __ ] was disrespectful Tales from the Hood is a hood classic to be too Tails from the hood bro everybody [ __ ] Nicholas my name that man called me eight dollars for real huh that movie made me hate dogs yeah that net them necklace but but the scariest one to me of all the stories the scariest one was the one when uh David Allen Group not they really scared of the abusive stepfather yeah it was the last one when them [ __ ] found out they was dead bro that was what that [ __ ] smacked that [ __ ] with the pace hmm he was like people cause I'm a for you I think this Spike Lee should make more movies like that yeah because he didn't miss the whole generation yeah he's gonna be difficult now though no it was my league I didn't have a lot of movies though that they we just don't know about you we should know about it we knew about all the mother ones I agree get back to making them good ass black stories man I agree and when I was becoming an alpha my [ __ ] I had watched school days and I had seen it before but that [ __ ] hit different when it hit different when you boy I'm talking about with them [ __ ] and I was you know coming to Alpha so that's saying when them [ __ ] was at that step show they went with the brothers of the illustrious Alpha awful Fraternity Incorporated them [ __ ] I was like ooh they made y'all learn that [ __ ] yeah hell yeah we did it at our probate we did we definitely was at our probate [Laughter] on the way this [ __ ] here Daddy Long stroke yeah exactly that's but my what's your favorite Spike Lee movie though I got to say do the right thing bro do the right thing that's a classic man he got games that's hilarious my name I'll be smacking them hoes I'd be smacking my holes everyone knows it goes smacking these holes smack them to the floor smacking these holes I be smacking my hoes thank you that was nice it's a beautiful thing what's that what's that other one he wrote with uh Robert Townsend man when they was Hollywood Shuffle Hollywood no that was just uh Hollywood Shuffle the return in the zombie pimp my back [Music] that's a class that's a good one uh Malcolm X probably now check this out though one night I'm in L.A though I'm on stage at the comedy store right uh I get off stage guess who out there oh my [ __ ] Spike Lee for real [ __ ] with it that's crazy the Don Cheadle character in Mo Better Blues one of my favorite characters ever Mouse no that was Denzel Once Dead then yeah you know Don Cheadle was a homeboy yeah like my favorite but who your favorite movie character if you got a few got a favorite in all the movies ever I got a number one period period number one oh what's your I gotta heal Roby Jackie Brown IE [ __ ] what man Odell Ruby the coldest [ __ ] ever the way he got Chris Tucker to get in that trunk of that car on that movie and they say look man you remember the uh three machine guns I sold last year he said man I ain't getting no goddamn truck it's like man we ain't going nowhere but to Koreatown being there no man no minutes man I said man I can't believe you do me like how small was that jail cell [ __ ] and then you know I got him he was like look after we get finished [ __ ] with these Koreans take it to Roscoe's Chicken and Waffles on me that's gold special 90s gravy collars that's some good eating yeah they got that [ __ ] in the trunk wrote them a place Strawberry Letter 23 pull it around the corner jumped out the jumped out the cop opened the trunk shot that [ __ ] two times in the head and pulled off [Music] coldest [ __ ] ever man that [ __ ] pulled up on Robert De Niro with Chris Tucker body in the trunk I remember that movie he opened up the trunk and was like [ __ ] who the [ __ ] is this what I do he said that's that's Beaumont like who's Beaumont favorite yeah the [ __ ] said what he do he put himself in the position where he was gonna have to do 10 years in prison that's what he did and if you know Beaumont do you know ain't no way you can do 10 years yeah and if you know that then you know beaumont's gonna do anything Beau my can to keep from doing them 10 years including telling the federal government any and every [ __ ] thing about my black hair yeah and that's a situation to him or me and you best believe it ain't gonna be me yeah that [ __ ] is a cold [ __ ] man I'm gonna go with uh [Music] I like this album bro engines who is this album who the [ __ ] is what the Idris album elbow what movie is it what did interest [Music] I thought that would know I'm thinking you saying that's a movie character I thought Idris Alba was in a movie I'd never seen that goddamn Beast of no Nation listen Beast of no Nation this [ __ ] probably watch this [ __ ] who is that [ __ ] saying my name like that I'm talking to you dude listen bro he like he like this African uh warlord okay and it's like this little boy you know the refugee they come in Kill Everybody [ __ ] it up I'm gonna watch it tonight bro listen you besides that [ __ ] 85 South show for real not another better show on that [ __ ] it's a series it's a movie okay that when I first heard it was Ill but talk in real life because bruh like this [ __ ] was string a bell on The Wire I'm trying to think if I had to pick up favorite movie character of all time I don't I never thought about it man if I had to pick one for you I think you'll pick pick a [ __ ] like JD's Revenge you know that I [ __ ] with all that that's what I'm saying like I haven't seen everything that's cause you're [ __ ] with Dave you remember you put the who I got mad it might be Nino Brown though yeah that's a cold one you know Brown no Wesley period no Nino Brown oh a character your favorite character in the movie you know I mean they don't have to be an actor and the daddy from Sugar Hill too oh yeah that's the same [ __ ] from uh tell from the hood yeah yeah yeah all the way he's a cold name foreign ugly what's up y'all it's your girl Lex p and it's your girls Ray Nicole and Miami we coming to turn up I'm excited I'm excited too we've been long overdue for a Miami show and I can't wait to see y'all it's the perfect way to kind of I just in the summer because the summer don't almost be over and it's like August 13th yeah we gonna be in Miami Miami Improv shows doors open at seven show starts at 8. yes and I'm telling y'all look this is right before my birthday too so y'all know I'm gonna be late I'm gonna put it on for Miami I'm telling y'all listen August 13th doors open at seven show starts at eight Miami Improv y'all please do not miss this show y'all know we gonna have people popping up rolling up on this Miami it's gonna be fun welcome to Miami so I'm Miami [Music] hey what's up Virginia July 22nd I will be in Tyson's Corner talk to me what you got going on on the 22nd pull up on me what's the theater Craig Capital One Hall that's where we're gonna be make sure you grab those tickets and pull up on me I've been trying to see you I know what you said about come over there though I'm working on something bigger than us if you didn't go to church today don't worry we got you it's a blessings that's gonna come through here too Church ain't number three or more people anybody ever been know that don't block your blessing in here it might not be there it might not be your church blessing it might be like your hood blessing called a hood blessing before like when you're driving home and you see the police behind you for a little bit then they hit the light and just scoot on beside you yeah yeah that's a good lesson right there because at the end of the day I'm on tour and I need you to be there so I can tell some jokes to you I see you when you come see me [Music] creeper Whispers creeper was the crackhead in the Dolomite movie oh yeah hamburger I gotta say bump adjust oh man yeah Lawrence Pittsburg yeah Furious Styles was a cold ass curious that's the that's a good conversation [ __ ] in movies back then you either had that type of data you either had a furious style type that you had a Nino bro you know [ __ ] so dope and [ __ ] yeah oh he wasn't there yeah he went there yeah but that's that hoodler man Hood I'm so crazy Carlos did you smell it I just I just hate when when they make movies about black people and they'd be like you can't be feed this baby with Drug Money yes you can know they be miscommunicating with the hood they might have said that at first but after a while you can feed that baby yeah you feed that baby some steak with drug money especially depending on what area it was in the moments didn't like the drug money and move it back there they always thought get this dope money out of my house you're alive they always get a mom a whack-ass job you ain't gonna [Laughter] go oh you take your dope money I'm gonna pay my family with that before you get to the door she got some black ass Bible verse I'd rather sell crack in the hell than to have a job yeah but Mama then it goes through a monologue I couldn't believe my mama would even talk to me that way when all I was trying to do was help the situation we was in but now I realize I'm really on my own then they had that one scene where the white cop show up Miss Jackson Miss Jackson can I ask you a few questions about your son [Laughter] laughs well if you remember anything you give me a call man that's how I beat the movies boy the movies they let the mama run back into the sun before the police get into them again oh yeah lock your ass up they gonna lock your [ __ ] ass yeah this is what a [ __ ] really balling now [ __ ] out there your mom your mom your moms man so this is what you're doing then you gotta stop your gangster bro it's my mama man Mr a money not that you care or anything but they just put a lien on the house and I don't know what I'm gonna do I did the best I can and let me go from the subway mechanic job mama look at me stop all that crap I paid the house off this morning everything's taken care of I'll need you crying that's what I've been trying to tell you this whole time all I've been trying to do is make it better for us and that's what this does mama you see all these people in here they work for me if you called that word [Applause] oh I'm coming soon from um I stay away from my woman that [ __ ] said what did you say man he was like yes yes suck it suck it [ __ ] suck it [ __ ] that [ __ ] said suck it suck it [ __ ] yeah she wasn't doing it like that before you left for the war wasn't she [Laughter] Merry Christmas Santa Claus hey man that [ __ ] cutting was a coach I should use it to kick you between your [ __ ] shoulder blades you got more heart than your punk ass daddy That's a classic classic That's a classic right there man another classical man [ __ ] don't talk about bro it's colors bro oh what colors was a good one night meant walking psychopath talking you know my favorite part is telling take it out that is our job [Laughter] man left them laying in the bed like a baby with a big dick was like you take it down oh yeah but that's the movie man it's the movie yeah excuse me but yeah that [ __ ] David wins in that [ __ ] man and colors was a classic this guy's a blood rocket rocket yeah you know another one they whooped his ass and put his face you know I never won the day I'll talk about uh what's about man Glenn Plummer South Central South Central OG Bobby Jones what Jim is only 10 years old at that age they don't ask no questions [Laughter] [Laughter] is when that [ __ ] black Ron saved my man from uh from getting raped by the uh white dudes hey this is a man he's a man this a mind he was like why need 25 carton cigarettes and you gonna listen I have a son and I was only about the way you dressed put your shoulders Loco low we get you high baby because I got the rock s pull the car over that wasn't cool it is my daughter can't sit through the [ __ ] that I like man I remember my man my daughter hurt my feelings so bad I was trying to show her wrestling from when I was a young Debbie man hated it I was trying to show her I mean I'm talking about classic matches I'm talking I'm trying to show remember when when uh Sean Michaels threw modu genetic through the glass on Brutus the Bible she was like Daddy why is this so violent I'm like fat it's not real she was like well if it's not real why do you care I said go upstairs just go go upstairs she had real logical reasons on why you shouldn't been watching that [ __ ] man I've been trying to force her to like the [ __ ] that I'm talking about now that she you know she kind of a little bit more receptive to it now the only thing that we didn't watch that she was cool with was the last dragon because she seen how that's my favorite movie and I just still act like a little boy when I watched The Last Dragon I'm still singing and doing the moves huh you'd be doing the move in front of the TV yes all the way still to this day when you reach that upper level your mind body and soul must be you one I know the break dances and everything when that [ __ ] was outside it was like man that [ __ ] was wiggling out them ropes [ __ ] that [ __ ] cold my favorite scene in that whole movie though is when showing up went to the pizzas real shop and broke her up everything little brother in the garbage you ain't my brother you ain't nothing you a sucker I can't just forget it we looking for Leroy I'm Leroy are you talking about Junior yeah Junior but y'all never watch the penitentiary fly too sweet fly nah come on cat the penitentiary how did Sweet Tooth I ain't never seen that before oh yeah when he draw them out of box that's why he remember when he started [Applause] I've seen Penitentiary one through five yeah yes Oh Oh I thought you were talking about Just Like Sugar Ray Leonard called sweet too yeah too sweet it looked like Sugar Ray Leonard for real yep I gotta watch that that [ __ ] coach that's a cold last movie bro hey hey what's up Houston Texas July 29th your man Carlos Miller that's right I'm coming down there where I'm gonna be at Craig ANS all make sure you grab those tickets and pull up on me if you didn't go to church today don't worry we got you it's a blessings that's gonna come through here too Church ain't number three or more people anybody ever been know that don't block your blessing in here it might not be there it might not be your church blessing it might be like your hood blessing before like when you driving home and you see the police behind you for a little bit then they hit the light and just scoot on besides yeah yeah that's a good lesson right there is that the end of the day I'm on tour and I'll come see you when you come see me [Music] foreign 20 years old right so for me with that kind of money still living in a project we had to figure it out what's happening where the [ __ ] did all these black people come from in Phoenix and I'm not speaking for every man in if I make it to be making 200 million [ __ ] I could make 200 000 I feel like I spoke to [ __ ] any [ __ ] I want so if Zion if you want to do that live your life what's up y'all it's your girl let's pee and it's your girl gray and a call and you are tuned in to another episode [Applause] where perfect now come on over all them Vines and [ __ ] more days and [ __ ] that's what I got for my 40th I ain't do nothing to it usually I put forges on everything I got um I ain't do nothing to this but put some music in there you know what I'm saying did you do the do one a guy damn okay that's living the life when you're on the hold on when you stand on a blow up mattress and you can get a girl look at your head eat your ass yeah man you cold blooded hey [Applause] [Music] you know about [ __ ] [ __ ] be broken and big man think about it but we've been so broke you just feel like you about to pass away sometime soon you'd be like I know God ain't got me out here living like this the native yes they're me you got this you got to get this monkey off your back you understand me if you ain't never broke a female off no chicken now it's nothing that you know men should glorify and be proud of but you know it's just culture foreign [Music] was taking coins off the top of the backboard that Earl manigo was jumping up taking coins what's your name or a minute ago did he say nanny goat and then the Earl manigo jumped up with some Chucks on and touched the top of the backboard oh when he snatched the dog off the top of the backboard wearing some Chuck Taylor cooling I used to be my [ __ ] too though Cooley how sad is a [ __ ] man listen bro they killed coach man I don't care they had to do Cochise like that bro no they didn't they didn't bro they didn't we we needed this segment man for classic black Cinema yeah any honorable mentions in there oh there's plenty of Lackawanna Blues Lackawanna Blues uh what else what's another classic black movie that most people don't Rosewood Warriors well Warriors wasn't really black touch how the gang bang for real yeah I mean that was the original gangbang yeah you did I love it I want you to test me on the inside yeah I'm gonna have to go I'm gonna have to go back to the 70s I'm gonna have to go uh you got the collective eyes Willie Dynamite oh well I'm gonna throw up the education anytime I see steps that's more than 12 steps that's how I walk down that way sideways you think you're so tough with your pretty black [ __ ] and your fancy cars and your in your hundred dollar fur coat hundred dollars [Laughter] you forgot one thing Sarge what's that those pretty white ones that work for me too yeah I've moved every [ __ ] in every kind of place and one thing I've learned you got to Collective eyes so you telling me that I got some of the coldest animals and they can only run in certain parts of the Jungle Willie I think it was time what if he has a bigger stable does he get more real estate yeah that was a cold man that movie was so mother that's a cold meat this [ __ ] went and did 40 years on Sesame Street yeah got that big bag one two three four five yep that name was that Dynamite that was on there on Sesame Street literally for 40. with the little bandana tied to the side well that boy I tell you that's a show that had me in the headlock too that Sesame Street boy it was like adult comedy though it had Barry White it was cartoon man the baron white was one of the voices on the cartoon bro oh it was CJ in the bed I think so it was a cartoon it was a cartoon but yeah that's Sesame Street boy we went to Sesame Place when I was a young [ __ ] man I [ __ ] you up what I'm talking about the happiest I've ever been see that's why I grew up in the 80s and it was kind of [ __ ] up the type of [ __ ] that we were entertained by like everything that we was watching on TV if we would have seen it in real life would have scared the [ __ ] out of us like a [ __ ] Fraggle Rock the [ __ ] is a Fraggle and these little [ __ ] had Talent too and most of their [ __ ] sound kind of like a rendition another Jackson Five even when the [ __ ] come on you just see these little weird ass fragments pop up let the music play work is for another day to chilling but they working at the same time just being friends Jim Henson was getting hiding a [ __ ] pull it up forever she was crazy come on man these [ __ ] used to come up like where the humans lived and [ __ ] and try not to get killed just be able to [ __ ] hard people [ __ ] these [ __ ] had whole lives where they would go on vacation and travel across country and all this [ __ ] but my people would come spend the night I'll tell you my little brother boy that [ __ ] Bonnie and lamb chopped my baby brother he tortured us with that that lamb chops bruh oh my God Antoine Bean used to be on their body and that but I can't even lie now as a grown man when I go back and watch some of them Bonnie episodes Bonnie and them was jamming on that [ __ ] I like to eat eat eat apples and bananas didn't even know it women got a line where he said Barney probably loses man I'm laid up with baby boy yeah [Applause] hey good thing y'all ain't got young baby because that cocoa melon [ __ ] is driving me crazy but some of that [ __ ] be rocking though I ain't gonna lie they got a lot of black shows now yeah but like it sounds like whole rap song yeah no they got that something Corner that the kids be watching there Gracie's Corner backyard Backyardigans produced by DJ Drama on God my daughter was on that on that door door to explore and then it was this this cartoon that used to come on PBS Kids called Super Why also basically what y'all saying is y'all want to create an educational show for some black kids and [ __ ] all you got to do is do the publish it we're going to teach black kids or we gonna we're gonna do real black [ __ ] well we're gonna teach them how to pay a bill yeah this is a bill yeah the numbers on this bill is real yeah so when you're in the house and you wanna chill cut the light off just a little or you might get a bill yeah Bill Bill wait come on we gotta have puppies that like teach the kids hello kids what is he doing the racism though come on I know you didn't say what I thought you said put your hands on me you ain't scared cause I'm a [ __ ] hello kids don't never let nobody call you a [ __ ] unless you a [ __ ] like me yeah he just got out of prison yeah and I'm going back kids yeah you let somebody call your [ __ ] you may end up in prison it's prison what's up kids you [ __ ] ready to go to The Slammer can you spell slamma can you spell Slammer s l a m m e r [ __ ] said we'll lock your ass in the slam we gotta do that bro how you keep oh you got all the drugs hanging out together I'm so sorry kids I can't seem to lift my spirit I'm telling you bro that's the one right there this is the key is the real way let's do it we gotta do it man all the way we do three episodes and then get discontinued right but that's all you need is three that [ __ ] is gonna live forever [Music] is going back to jail don't let nobody call you a [ __ ] unless you the [ __ ] like me see you next week all right foreign still not the grocery store that's crazy man we should do something for the kids got some lotions got some socks we can't buy that stuff booster bear why not cause it's stolen who said that hey man that's that boy oh my God that'd be hilarious bro you kicking all these good ideas on here don't listen yeah this is this is uh you know created intellectual property right here yeah I mean all we waiting on now is them people to hit us back about the puppets there's somebody out there that make them too boy we get some puppets Joe oh my god did you see this do the voices for the puppets somebody made us some light up [ __ ] [ __ ] piercings wow [ __ ] me up that's crazy it's a um reflection of what it could this is crazy I mean would you even feel comfortable looking using this yes yeah is it a different level of arousal and I'll probably lick the ashes up about this one turn it off that's why I don't take you nowhere man bro what is wrong with you my name you're like bad back why you talking that girl I don't know what you mean yeah God damn man that's tough be careful man don't do nobody like that [Music] [ __ ] around and eat some [ __ ] you can't swallow I don't even want you to elaborate yeah don't let that one just good yeah it's living [Laughter] Netflix yeah and chill we now part of the officials man look man you know how many black children gonna be born because of this yeah come on all right all the way without question it's going down we've got something to do with the black population now we showing them that we are well above what they thought we were this [ __ ] is just amazing man shout out to everybody who've been [ __ ] with us since day one I don't know what your day one is I don't know if your day one was from Steve Studio I don't know if your day one was brick wall I don't know if you was around doing the back room sessions I don't know if you would there when we moved to the Trap I don't know if you would I don't know where you've been I don't know where when you started this journey but at whatever point you you got on and stayed on I told you now we're going even bigger we're trying to get us a special on Disney Channel [Applause] for the kids on the Disney Channel yeah boy I can't wait we're gonna have a Sesame Street one all right y'all too grappy nah you gotta do it bro hey man you shouldn't do that that cause your mama might ass who's that you know it is it's dookie not dookie yeah it's me p.u in the building he didn't beat you he asked how you teach the kids how to be clean you know what I mean make sure you wipe your own ass all the way G that's live man we got it we got it man we gotta watch this they are like able to respond to those type of messages yeah all the way especially musically like there's some music involved and you know how every episode should start off wow somebody's dropping the kid like like a single mom dropping the kid off trying to explain where she going I'm going downtown to look for work you're just gonna have to stay here on educational Corner till I get back [Laughter] all this [ __ ] happened on this corner that looks just like my block this is your blood and you are welcome to come to it all kids are welcome here on the educational corner and guess what we're learning today is she over there insensitive [Music] [Laughter] [Applause] [Laughter] [Laughter] this is [Laughter] on their shoes oh no kids hey I got this glass for y'all man that's all glass used to be your glass oh my goodness that [ __ ] crazy don't let nobody call you a [ __ ] hey man we need sponsored in part bye if you make dolls but if you make the puppies Man Holla at us but we need the educational purpose that should be crazy educational don't make them perfect either make them look kind of [ __ ] up yeah enough to get the point across exactly educational what I will say is don't make them don't try to make them look like us we want some real puppies and I want my shoes to be like blue or purple or something one of those colors that kids can get them yes right all the way I know we will not be using curse words not on the kids not for the kids if we made it an adult show bruh yeah with the kids yeah that that'll be hilarious but if we can add so much more in there if it's an adult show for kids that's something we cannot keep bro that's too much yeah kids show for it because I hear his hair run for a child yeah I mean yeah stay away from it right but now hey you got to stay away from it y'all do you got to change this now because you know what I mean that it's per 30. I'm Percocet I'm used for pain some of them people use another thing what is it supposed to be used for Mr Perkins stuff don't put Percocets in your butt oh wait perk daddy you gone too far [Laughter] yeah amen every time [ __ ] in the room [ __ ] they getting hauled off gotta come back you got to that's hilarious man you just keep getting put off the show and come back at somebody different to me hey man that's the recurring theme of the show right now can you see insensitive that's classic man oh my God with that oh man we're gonna take over next World Pinky and the Brain you trying to go over there BBC Plus bet is sometime man we need to get Tyler to pray in here man yeah he'll come over here you know Tyler Perry nah I don't but I feel like you know the [ __ ] hey feel like you know us he know who he is you think so you don't feel like we do he might not he knows I feel like he he probably don't know nobody that he didn't create if he didn't have something to do with it he ain't gonna it's what now I don't know you know bro you think so I believe I know he know do we need to reach out to him or like I call that [ __ ] right now call him see them [ __ ] damn man he probably do watch this [ __ ] he probably roll up roll up a fat ass John and watch this [ __ ] backs away I believe [ __ ] no Morgan Freeman watch it I believe right in Mississippi and Oxford too you got a house he probably sits there and wonders what we're going to do next as we walk Paul on the stage back and forth wonder what these Negroes are going to accomplish as they move forward wow and they looked at five South Shields that's what we get to do the next day they looked happy we're gonna get as happy as a [ __ ] eating cornbread they were happy we got to get baby you got to get Morgan Freeman to do the intro on the next one ladies and gentlemen that'll be hard yeah we should we should definitely look into that because now we're taking over we're going to do some shows in Saudi Arabia or something I don't know but we're gonna they're gonna give us about a half a million for sure making up [ __ ] okay you're doing the B Simone you're manifesting oh man that's what you're doing y'all do a prison show nope it's not going to prison for nothing why not nope do a prison show no [ __ ] in prison don't want to be there why the [ __ ] would I go volunteering done and they're gonna understand me I mean I'm not doing it but I'm saying though prison show but I would I would I would advocate for them to be able to watch us in prison I've been on the outside looking into the inside because they watch they they get to watch wild and out in prison so no they don't yeah no on TV if you want to see well now girls and [ __ ] since forever bro you know how many [ __ ] come home especially from the feds Jerry Springer to see some ass up federal penitentiary man everybody that come home from the feds be like bro that was my while I'm out with my [ __ ] in prison but we'll take the guy don't wait till you're impressive to start watching comedy the insurance girl uh flow of the sexiest [ __ ] on TV in that [ __ ] on God they don't show you a lot of women in there because you flow bro from Progressive out of the gun flow down so many times oh Lord ladies and gentlemen [Laughter] thank you I thought she was saying he was winning too man Otis will no longer be with us real flow all right I feel you though man I'm going to jail back in the day they ain't show a lot of you know what I'm saying while they're not y'all it's sexy women on there they ain't doing all that and you were just wasn't in the FED huh they do it in the field now today they wasn't doing it back then you can't go to the feds no so yeah yeah they still was in jail for a weekend bro you act like you did so much time I did I did 35 years brother I've been in Shockers all my life that [ __ ] did one weekend bro got out money too busy today when I was in jail then y'all know what they were watching that TV didn't change it jerked off the floor the whole two days I'm trying to tell you things to show you [ __ ] like that make you know why would they show you something to get you aroused they showed you stupid [ __ ] Maury you got to be happy that a bit that I used to be happy when the baby wasn't the [ __ ] because the [ __ ] gonna run off and we gonna see that we ice don't be this [ __ ] Baby Bro something wrong I know you are that's the part that's [ __ ] up about it is [ __ ] is crazy I used to wish they what the daddy so he could see the girls and then you gotta get that's a sure you gotta take mental pictures you are not the father you got to throw that blanket over your head real quick hey man on that note this baby hold up hold up this is 85 stop show and mailman oh my God [Applause] hey what's up Sam Antonio July 28th I'm gonna be down there at the m Amphitheater don't let nobody tell you no different if you didn't go to church today don't worry we got you it's a blessings that's gonna come through here too Church ain't number three or more people anybody ever been know that don't block your blessing in here it might not be it might not be your church blessing it might be like your hood blessing called a hood blessing before like when you driving home and you see the police behind you for a little bit then they hit the light and just scoot on besides you yeah yeah that's a good blessing right there this everybody's San Antonio man pull up on me July 28th you already know I won't get to come to San Antonio often but when I do I'm in San Antonio and I'll come see you when you come see me [Music] foreign [Music] just in case you wonder what we're doing we are now showing you just how important having the 85 South Show app is because you was watching this show thinking oh David finally put the [ __ ] back on YouTube no they was listening we weren't we weren't [Music] all right now you got to know what we said you gotta go get the app that's the 85 South Show app it's available on Amazon Fire stick Apple TV wherever you get yourself no it's not it's just it's available directly where they sell apps or they don't sell apps on Apple TV well y'all should [ __ ] what don't say [ __ ] nobody no I didn't say [ __ ] oh we do I have full of Roku so subscribe to the app it's only 8.99 a month or 85 a year so you get a whole year for 85 did you know that it's 8 50 and then you got to pay tax yeah so you know you know we give them all type of content you know what we're not even gonna tell them who you got your glasses from until they get on out I mean hey you gotta watch the app the app is available all of these people that say we should keep putting this on YouTube for free what about the years of freeness that we've already provided upon you we gave this away for free for years let's move together while you're buying their [ __ ] so don't ask us we're putting it on the app who's over the app nobody knows [Music] yeah we saw what you said in the comments we saw it we saw everybody The Good the best and The Ugly so you know what we folding under this pressure we hear you we hear you we win it we'll just get the [ __ ] on that y'all way just for an hour though that's all you get is it out so don't you can't complain but with the rest of it oh see we gotta hurry up and put a whole bunch of ads in between like five minutes hey how you doing slow motion when you say [ __ ] time yeah uh let's just uh go ahead make sure channel85.com I want to make sure I read what they wrote they wrote some [ __ ] out for us these [ __ ] don't know how to spell or type proper sentences but they trying to get us to get y'all to buy the app what do you think we want to read this [ __ ] Channel 85 man so we can talk that [ __ ] man ladies [Music] that's right on the app uncensored unfiltered and edited can you believe that I'm talking about with actual production in it thanks jump Cuts Clips all types of type of like exclusive [ __ ] that they don't even know that we they don't even know that we got a show where we be cooking like exotic foods and [ __ ] that's on there yeah Chico got a handwriting class that he teach nobody passed it because that's why the [ __ ] looked like this but we're working on it and you can see it on the app they didn't even tell them about the tax course that we had uploaded on there okay they don't even know that we got a whole show about Wall Street right and we got the alternate ending to The Color Purple up there oh right it's on the app so if you want to see some [ __ ] that you know they trying to have from you go to that I'm leaving though Channel 85.com you got an hour for free we gave you what you wanted now give us some subscriptions to the app 85 a year channel85.com 85 South show get the app well see this what they don't know they have really three dollars but adjusting for inflation yeah what low said get that man stop bullshitting we out of here man we're not about to keep working all this time for been waiting for free we on your way to fly oh

Channel: The 85 South Comedy Show

Views: 331,885

Keywords: nigerian, comedy, dcyoungfly, karlousmiller, mtv2, wildnout, podcast, chicobean, kevinhart, dc young fly podcast, 85 south show new, 85 south show time, karlous miller podcast, chico bean podcast, 85 south podcast, funny comedy show, black

Id: bLjpPK2KhI0

Length: 97min 24sec (5844 seconds)

Published: Fri Jul 07 2023