The Collapsed Narcissist: What Happens When a Narcissist Can't Get Supply

do you know a narcissist who's perpetually playing the victim role someone who hates everyone in the world or at least a whole bunch of people mostly those who are different than him or her because somehow these people are the cause for this person's misery have you noticed that often these particular narcissists seem to be completely alone in the world they have no regular source of supply and they just seem to be taking out their hateful energy on the world at large or they have a regular source of supply but it's just not quite enough for them sometimes a narcissist loses his or her ability to obtain adequate sources of narcissistic supply this can happen when the narcissists family and friends have just had enough and one by one they slowly abandon the narcissist or in some cases the narcissist who loses their ability to attract a new supplier because they get older they lose their looks or they become so self-involved that they forget how to do the whole love bombing thing effectively or any combination of these things and many other things this is what we call a collapsed narcissist and in this video I'm gonna go into more detail about what that means for the narcissist and the people and then our system life what is a collapsed narcissist that's what we're talking about today at Queen being calm let's get started [Music] my name is Angie Atkinson and on this channel I offer free daily video coaching to help you discover understand and overcome narcissistic abuse and toxic relationships I like to call it toxic relationship rehab sound good if so hit that subscribe button and let's get going so knowing what we know about narcissists we know that they really do sort of need that supply to keep going don't they but since they need that supply to exist what happens if they don't get it do they just sort of become a real person and start dealing with things like a normal person or do they just sort of lose it when a narcissist is unable to obtain narcissistic supply what do you expect some people are gonna call this a narcissistic crisis or a collapsed narcissus whatever the label it's a problem and often not just for the narcissist but also for other people around the narcissist in their lives whether they're family members co-workers friends whatever neighbors they can be dealing with the problem of the narcissist now a collapse narcissist is simply a narcissist who has not been able to obtain proper narcissistic supply as in a person to help bolster his or her self-worth self-esteem self-confidence their general value as a human being they require someone else to do that for them they cannot sell validate ever on any level in essence the narcissist feels like they've been denied the very supply that they need to exist the proverbial life's blood of the narcissist is narcissistic supply from other people this leaves them dove course to narcissistic injury and as the collapsed narcissist rise helplessly in the pain of not getting what they want what they believe they're do what they think that they need to exist whether it's meeting some big goal or simply getting the admiration and praise they feel they rightly deserve their whole world starts to feel like it's falling down around them the narcissist loses self-esteem and their self-image is merely erased they begin to self devalue self-doubt they literally hate themselves to the point that they project this self hate on to everybody around them since everyone hates me they think the narcissist well they may as well hand them back right there is no more or very little social life for a collapsed narcissist even if they were once the social butterflies they've got no one left people this narcissist thinks they're all faking stupid anyways so why should we bother to be kind to them at this point the narcissist lives in a constant attack mode attempting to force people around them to provide that much-needed supply random people waitresses the guy at the gas station you know their sons fifth grade teacher whatever they are overly sensitive about everything full of Rage full of hate and they throw temper tantrums that would rival those of a two-year-old although that's a little insulting to the two-year-old you know they are outright intolerant disrespectful and often even violent toward the people around them in both words and actions they previously once maintained a certain facade didn't they of a nice or a cool or easygoing or friendlier great person to be around but as the collapse continues that mask falls away the facade is gone and suddenly you're looking at the true face of a narcissist and it is full of rage and ugliness hate general disgust for everything that is humanity while they are still unable to deal with any sort of blame criticism or perceived disrespect of themselves they are actively projecting their own self hate onto the people around them in their lives or maybe random targets like people of different religions different races or even different political affiliations this is when the gloves come off and the narcissist blasts out their latent bigotry and their small-minded ways this is when anyone who's different than the narcissist is a big target they are quickly minimized they are putting to it not good enough box to put it very mildly this is often when narcissist will go all-out to abuse their partners physically mentally and otherwise some narcissists will excessively cheat gamble away their money and even physically abuse their partners and their children in these situations in some cases it's worse the narcissist might even cause the death of a partner or a child it's horrifying the things that they will do the depths to which they will sink following the falling of the narcissistic facade the mask and the outrageous abuse that comes after it is the rock bottom part of this whole deal this is when get to press they become suicidal they threatened or even commit suicide they might also take a serious action to hurt someone else or other large groups of people some of this has occurred in the news in recent months and I won't mention it here because YouTube doesn't like it when I do that but you all know what I'm talking about some narcissists are gonna get desperate enough to even enter therapy at this point but it never works and of course they just go completely bonkers if they don't enter therapy and they might completely lose control and again this is when you hear about them in the news the loss of supply triggers defensive behaviors from the narcissist such as the whole I'm gonna leave my family and start a whole new life thing the narcissist literally flees the scene of his or her failures or what they see is failures and attempts to just start all over again with something new someone new if you look at the narcissistic personality as a sort of house built on stilts you know like around here they have them on the river they have these homes built up on sticks almost stilts imagine that the lack of narcissistic supply is kind of like a big strong wind that comes through and knocks those houses down right into the river the narcissist then has two choices they can try to become a whole person and develop real coping skills rebuild the house as it were and in some cases obtain new supply or it can stay in that collapse position and from it poison everything and everyone around them in their world what do you think they're gonna do so back to the house metaphor the narcissist could burn down all the other houses around them in order to take revenge on everything and everyone else who in their minds caused this to happen to them caused the big strong wind to come through what it all comes down to is that regardless of the reason for the narcissistic collapse the narcissist blames everything and everyone except him or herself for this collapse the narcissist must believe ultimately that they are the victim and that nothing is their fault if you're stuck now with a collapse narcissist there's one escape and you know what it is you've got to leave you've got to never look back you have to go no contact and you have to resist the urge to try to help them because they are unhelpful that was a word I don't know I just made it up for you they won't be helped you can't do this anymore you've got to start to take care of your children if you have them and definitely yourself if you have them no contact is the only solution for a collapsed narcissist all right this brings me to the question of the day the question of the day is do you think that you know a collapse narcissists have you ever seen a collapse narcissist and what did that look like for you I see this a lot in elderly narcissists or middle-aged narcissists especially those who once relied on their looks as part of their stick but what have you seen let me know share your thoughts and your experiences in the comments section below and let's talk about it all right you might just help another survivor learn that they're not alone that's all I've got for you right now thank you so much for being a part of my day and a part of my life and hey thanks Phil it may be a part of yours it really does mean a lot to me I'll see you soon it's my mission to teach others what I know to be true you really can create the life you want take care of your body take care of your soul their true the real you and introduce him or her to the world be comfortable in your own skin and in your place in this world take your spot take it now and the universe will take us on cue thank you you feel me if so subscribe to my channel let's get it done together

Channel: Angie Atkinson

Views: 148,457

Rating: 4.9145465 out of 5

Keywords: narcissistic abuse recovery, npd, gaslighting, trauma bonding, DUO method, queenbeeing, narcissists in relationships, certified life coach, love bombing, escape narcissistic abuse, collapsed narcissist, narcissistic crisis, narcissist, narcissism, narcissistic abuse, narcissist silent treatment, narcissism in relationships, gaslighting emotional abuse, narcissist hoovering, narcissist support, narcissist discard, narcissism survivor, codependency, invalidation, cluster b

Id: FikVPQfppuc

Length: 9min 6sec (546 seconds)

Published: Tue Oct 24 2017