[decidedly un-poppy jazz music]
[computer buzzes, beeps] Welp, soon it’s gonna be May, so
what better time to cover this? The NSYNC Hotline Fantasy Phone, the self-described Ultimate NSYNC Game, developed
by Stunt Puppy Entertainment and published by Infogrames in 2001. “Rrrrring - It’s NSYNC
Calling!” “Get NTOUCH with NSYNC right on your own PC!” “Get NCOMING calls, watch NTIMATE
videos.” And go NTIRELY NSANE with these N PREFIXES! Yes, it’s the Hotline Fantasy Phone,
a purple piece of plastic that is apparently “better than a real phone.” Because you can take
NSYNC with you anywhere, use it as a controller, and call the guys anytime you like. Ahh, 2001
sure was a time to exist. This hails from the golden years of cheap plastic toy electronics,
with monochrome LCDs, tinny sound, and a minuscule amount of battery-backed memory. The Cybiko, The
Pixter, Tamagotchis, Giga Pets and the like. And an increasing number of these included software
adding to a toy’s highly limited featureset. Exactly what we have here, a PC activity
center/toy cell phone/creep simulation thing that’s remained sealed for 22 years. Which
we’ll open up soon, this I promise you. But yeah, this pop culture oddity is one that retailed
for between $35 and $40, depending on when and where it was purchased. About the same
cost as The Sims base game was back then, to put the price in context. Although
if you bought it from Best Buy it did include a free bubblegum-filled lunchbox,
no strings attached. [lunchbox plonks down] A deceptively small one, I’m disappointed to
report. Don’t know what the heck kinda puny lunch you could fit in this little thing, although... [box opens, gum spills outward] The quantity of gum able to be packed in here
is quite respectable. And appropriate for one of the most bubble gummiest pop bands
around at the turn of the millennium. Anyway, unboxing time. And inside the box
is of course the fake cellular telephone, along with a fake CD printed on the packaging.
The real CD is packed away underneath, inside a cloth sleeve. Alongside an
instruction manual, with 47 pages going into great detail about how the phone
works, how to navigate the Hotline program, and how each minigame plays. Ending with a
Game Boy Color teaser, which would be ‘NSYNC: Get to the Show’ from the same developer and
publisher. That NSYNC IP, so hot back then, and publisher Infogrames was proud of it. So much
so it got a shoutout in the infamously cheesy corporate anthem, “Infogrames Rocks My World.” ♪ Survivor, Civilization ♫ ♪ Superman saves the nation ♫ ♪ NSYNC Hotline, Dragonball ♫ ♪ Alone in the Dark, and that's not all ♫ ♪ Infogrames is innovation ♫ ♪ The power of imagination ♫ ♪ Infogrames is entertainment ♫ ♪ That rocks my world! ♫ [devious chuckling]
Sorry to do that to you! Okay, no I’m not. Back to
the stuff though, like batteries! The phone runs off three AAA batteries, and immediately powers
on with no way to fully turn it off, it just goes into rest mode after a bit. It won’t do much on
its own, and that brings us to the sync cable, which plugs into a PC’s gameport and connects to
the 6-pin interface on the phone. Heh, I like how this says “for home or office use” on the back.
I really hope someone in 2001 brought this into work to use at the office. Anyway, let’s get this
plugged into a Windows 98 PC and get the software set up! Installation is simple and requirements
are low, so long as you’ve got a Pentium II 233, 32 megs of RAM, and a 2MB video card with
DirectX 8, you’re good to go. After this it tries to connect to the phone, which again is done
via the gameport. And no, I checked and it does not show up as a joystick, so no playing Doom
with an NSYNC Phone, unfortunately. Anyway, if it’s successful you’ll hear this ringtone.
[that ringtone] And from here you’re free to begin the About Me section, filling in your name, birthday,
bedtime, ringtone, and your favorite guy. From a selection of NSYNC bandmates of course, not
just like, any random guy. The ringtones play through the phone’s tiny speaker,
with 5 short clips of NSYNC tracks. [ringtones play one after another] And from here it’s down to you to peruse the
software, playing minigames in All Access Pass or No Strings mode, customizing the phone further,
or going Behind The Scenes once you’ve unlocked that. And when you’re ready to say “bye, bye, bye”
clicking “Gotta Bounce” will quit the program. Though not before sending secret messages to your
phone! What exactly it sends is pretty randomized, but every time you close Hotline it selects
an assortment of PMD files to upload, with lo-fi audio messages and texts from the
band. And the idea here is that you can continue the NSYNC experience away from the PC, with quote
unquote “phone calls” coming through every five minutes or so.
[phone rings repeatedly] Whether you pick up immediately
or receive the voicemail, the results are the same, usually
a message of incredible importance. [phone beeps]
-“Man, I got popcorn in my hair!” In addition, they’ll also send messages, both
voice and text, based on information from the player’s profile on PC. Like wishing you a happy
birthday, saying good night as it approaches bedtime, and expressing their concerningly rising
admiration, and affection. Which uhh, gets into slightly creepy territory if you think about it.
Considering this is made for players ages 8 and up, and everyone on the box looks like, 12.
I know it’s just supposed to be some silly fun, but out of context? It’s a buncha dudes ranging
from 20 to 30 years old calling up kids to tell them how much they miss them, wanna spend
time with them, and saying how good they look. -”Lookin’ gooood!” -”You know your voice brings
a little smile to my face.” -”Now THAT is hot!” -“You bowl me over.” “Rrrrring-It’s the cops calling!”
Ehh. Thankfully as a 36-year-old with a thinning hairline and a
mortgage, I feel at ease being complimented by 2001-era Justin Timberlake
and probing his thoughts late into the night. [dials numbers, telephone rings] -”Hey, it’s Justin! You can
ask me whatever you want.” - You ever gonna get rid
of that Ramen noodle hair? [phone beeps] -“No way!"
[goofy chuckle] -I didn’t think so. Yeah you can also treat the phone as a slightly
higher tech Magic 8 Ball. Call up any of the guys using their printed phone numbers, and
ask yes, no, or maybe questions to receive a randomized response after hitting the “talk”
button. We are truly in the 21st century. -”The number you dialed is incorrect.”
”Please check the number and try again.” - The remainder of the experience is all
in Windows and, well. It is what it is. A program made for tweens with crushes on
pop stars, the kinda kids with stacks of Bop and Teen Beat magazines packed with
interviews, trivia, and foldout posters. It’s also a program that exists solely because
a bunch of music executives, industry bigwigs, and IP lawyers all came together and agreed
to fart out just enough cash to hire a small team of developers to make this as quickly as
possible. It’s draped in corporate self-interest and out-of-touch management, perfectly summed up
by how when starting a new game you’re greeted by what every 8-year-old craves: a message from
band manager and WEG president Johnny Wright. -”Hi, I'm Johnny Wright, NSYNC’s manager,
bringing you a totally new, totally exclusive game called NSYNC Hotline. Use this special phone
because it's your direct connection to them. You can help them get things done
and then they'll give you a number where they're going to be next.
Oh, and I definitely need to tell you, there's a very special surprise
when you finish the game.” - Coooool. So the story goes, and yes there actually
is a story... the NSYNC concert is sold out, oh noez! Probably Ticketmaster’s fault somehow,
they’ve sucked for decades. But don’t let it tear up your heart, simply prove you’re their
biggest fan and you’ll win tickets to the show! And this is accomplished by dialing
phone numbers given to you by, uh. Johnny Wright? I guess? Doesn’t
matter, just dial those phone numbers, kid. Which is done physically on the
phone itself, kind of a neat gimmick. You can also use the keyboard numpad, but having
a little toy cell phone certainly adds some charm. So from here you’re taken to a new location and
finally get some action with one of the guys. -”Okay. Help us out here.
It's time for us to practice our quick change for the concert. We each put together some outfits
and the rest of the guys have to match up. It's hard to keep it all together
and move fast enough to get back on stage. Help us find the right pieces. One guy at a time.” - Ah man, that charisma is off the charts,
I’m swooning over here. Anyway there are five minigames to complete: Bowling, Make A Move,
Quick Change, Charity Challenge, and Trivia. The order in which you play them is randomized,
though No Strings mode lets you pick and choose, provided you don’t care about unlocking things.
And yeah, despite not showing up as a joystick in Windows, the phone does function as an input
device! Though only within the Hotline program. So you’ll be dialing phone numbers to move around,
changing the guys clothes to match their own stated personal styles, firing cupid arrows
at floating objects to earn money for charity somehow, answering wildly mundane trivia questions
while NSYNC does the worst MST3K episode ever, loosely commanding marionettes in Simon Says
fashion to royalty-free music, and tossing balls at bowling pins with the NSYNC member’s
heads on top with the worst bowling physics you’ve ever seen. And it’s all over in roughly 30
minutes. And thank goodness, cuz these games suck! Unsurprisingly. Heh, whatever, it’s fine! It’s
one of those things where the intended audience was less concerned about quality and more so,
just, happy to see their favorite group on-screen at all. And gaining access to the Behind the
Scenes features is somewhat rewarding, I guess? It amounts to little more than a single blooper
for each bandmate and a handful of photos, but it’s something. There’s more to unlock if you
complete every minigame on the highest difficulty, but [scoffs] Nope. Nope! Don’t care
enough for that, I’ve seen all I need. And that’s the NSYNC Hotline Fantasy Phone game,
a thoroughly forgettable experience other than the phone itself. Yeah... I don’t know why I covered
this [laughs] I dunno, I just see a toy cell phone PC peripheral from 2001, and I’m drawn
to it like a moth to an Oddware flame. Uh, in hindsight I learned nothing and this was far less
interesting than I hope it’d be. But I suppose if I was part of the intended demographic back when
it was new, I’d probably have differing thoughts. The band virtually texting and calling throughout
the day was a neat gimmick for a toy cell phone, especially back in the days before every kid had
their own touchscreen computer in their pocket. NSYNC Hotline is the kind of product that makes
absolutely no sense today for a multitude of reasons, and I think there’s a sort of weird charm
to that. At least for a few minutes, and I’ve spent a little more time than that making this,
that ain’t no lie. Bye bye bye. Bye bye. Eungh. [laid-back jazz, random bowling sounds] Yeah I didn’t know how to end that video, in case
you couldn’t tell, but anyway I hope you enjoyed something there regardless. If not, whatever,
I’ve covered a bunch of other retro computing things here on LGR, with new stuff always in
the works. And as always, thanks for watching!
