Take the Shot or Lose the Chance | Why You Should Just Go For It w/ Alex Hormozi

if you have nothing going for you it's another way of saying that you have nothing to lose and so it means that you have endless shots on goal and so you should be the most prone to taking action because there's nothing holding you back own your future because if you don't someone else will welcome back to the own your future podcast you know I've been so blessed to bring on friends that are so cool and have so much depth of knowledge that this podcast has been doing incredible since since our new launch and I want to say thank you for that and today to say this gentleman's a friend I think everybody says that when they first do an interview this is my buddy Alex Our Guest interview here in a minute and I met via text effort and we spent like six months or you're getting to know each other I laughed every morning at our text you know what we laughed at before I introduced the formal stuff it was a time where both of us waited to invest in cryptocurrency and we both talked about it and we both equally went in the day it reached its peak am I lying like and then we decided that it crashed after that that we would not invest anymore because we didn't want to hurt the rest of the investors so anyway we built an amazing friendship uh via text we got together and hit it off he is truly one of the smartest marketers I've ever met smartest businessman he is an incredible husband he's a dear friend he's a good human being and I'm so glad we got to know each other yes he's built he built five companies in like record time over 120 million dollars exited out of multiple companies now he's got a massive portfolio of companies that he's a part of that do over 200 million dollars a year in Revenue he's on fire on Zach was position.com you see them all over social media I'm so glad to have my friend here Alex hermosi what's up man that was like the nicest intro um thank you I'll do my very best to live up to that it's true man and listen the fun part I wish we could share some of the texts I literally remember being at the gym and I couldn't get back to it like a next set because I was still laughing so hard so it's been it's been a fun uh relationship you know um call it the own your future podcast you know why because Tony and I Robbins and I did a a a challenge about three years ago we called it own your future and I was on a podcast and someone said why would you want to own your future and my reply was well if you don't own your future someone else is gonna yeah and that hit me and I watched everybody's comment was like oh oh my God because you don't think about that your career could own you your old beliefs could own you yeah uh your your current income because you're not stretching yourself to to finally launch that business you were gonna could be owning you and I think at the end of the day we all want to own our calendar we want to own our decisions so that's why I went that way so we'll get into some fun stuff and if we can go personal because we're friends but I love that question what does that mean to you like what does it mean to Alex to own your future so I mean I think it means High agency so meaning like when we're kids it becomes real we learn what the world means through other people and so like you're you know you you have Luca and he's like what does that mean and what is that and so you're literally telling him what things mean and so like the first things we learn are only from the few people around us that tell us how to interpret the world and then once we turn 16 17 18 20 23 all of a sudden we're like I don't know of everything that every one of these people who told me what things mean were right yeah and so we spend the rest of our lives trying to unlearn what everyone has told us meant and then make up that meaning for ourselves wow that's an amazing and true because you the word that came in you're trying to decipher is that my father's perspective yeah or is that reality and what is reality yeah yeah and so that so my you know my my goal personally has been to dissect decisions and think like is this a decision that I'm making because I believe this or because of what I want other people to think about me as a result of this decision and we're social beings we care about what other people think and I don't think we're ever going to like get completely rid of that from us I mean you'd have to be you know Gandhi or whoever you know Buddha right but at least if I can try and be aware of how much something might influence me then at least gives me the the wherewithal to say okay warning flags this is a sensitive subject that your dad always wanted for you be extra careful around decisions that impact that go in this direction and so I can just take that extra pause of space and say okay is this really me or is this because I want him to think this about me wow and and like dad is really just a foil it could be your brother your sister your spouse your ex-wife you know what I mean that rival or the competitor whoever it is the the moment that I realized this in my life was I was 19 years old and at the time I was an angry 19 year old like some of us are and probably unrightfully so um but I really disliked both my parents uh really heavily and I remember thinking to myself like they messed me up I have all these anger issues like I hate everyone I'm alone with whatever and I remember catching myself blaming them and thinking to myself that means that I give them all the power in my life like that wherever wherever I point the finger of blame is also where the power follows it's like power follows blame yeah and so I was like well what am I going to do about it because maybe they did wrong it doesn't really matter it's only me who can who can own yeah my own future because otherwise they're going to own my future for the rest of my life and then the thing that made it crack for me was the idea that the people that I hated the most owned me that was the thing so like so it's like so these people that I hated and blamed then flipping it from the blame to they own me they have power over me I was like I never want them to have power over me and then that was actually the first real crack I had in like the damn of trying to like make my own life and start that was when I decided to not be pre-med because that was what my dad wanted me to be and like if there were many steps on this you know this journey but the first one of like just not being a doctor like him and being just saying like I want to get into business because it's like I'm way more interested in this stuff like you can imagine I was like shaking to try and tell my dad this um but yeah it was like I blame them they owned me I don't want that yeah you know I want to dissect this a little bit and I I can't wait to talk about some business things and things that I know people need in today's world but this is more important because what I always I love the term going Upstream I know it's simple it was it was a term I heard Tony Robbins talked about the medical field right it was a doctor pulls into a medical office and there's a stream buy and there's someone drowning he goes in you've heard this before and he goes and saves him and another doctor pulls up he's like help me help me save this next person save this next person and finally a doctor pulls up and looks and he goes come help us and he drives away and he stops he goes hey hey how come you're not gonna help us he's like I'm just gonna drive upstream and see who's throwing these people in yeah right it's like you you're never gonna get them all let's just stop the bastard throwing people in the Stream and that stuck with me so much that everything the reason I I love this podcast about business about marketing but really I want to go Upstream because the human condition that so many people are are watching and listening right now they think it's the marketing thing or the sales thing or the invention they have to have or maybe they didn't have the right employee or but really when you go up to that next level there are things sabotaging us today that we're put in our lives by parents by a teacher by an experience by a bad relationship if we don't solve that then there's no way we can go Downstream and clear up all the people right so thank you for for being vulnerable and sharing that because I would bet to say there's so many people watching today listening today that don't realize that someone else is owning their decisions based on the past and I'd love to know going deeper on what you shared is how did you really how did you make that like what was the thing 19 is young to be able to recognize that I probably recognize that in my 30s and some people maybe never yeah and the the question I'll say is would you take any of it back because I think if you blame like if you blame your parents up to that they're like hey they didn't support me they want to be a doctor and if I'm not a doctor I'm nobody I'm a loser I'm pathetic you'll never make it we can laugh about some of the things we've talked about in our lives but like you're not going to make it you're going to be a loser you're blowing your life nothing will ever work and then when it does work you don't get the credit they're like well you got lucky it'll probably fail anyway right how do you get to a point to realize sorry I I see you shaking all right you know um how do you get to the point where you go wow thank God they did that because it drove me to be stronger faster more Innovative more creative and now you get to you know own your decisions yeah I think I think it's a I think it's an overtime process because I mean I certainly think when I was 19 years old I was not there it was the first crack and the thing was just like I was so angry and so the idea and like I Define power is just like influence over someone else's events things people Etc and so like they were influencing my decisions which means they had power over me and it just sickened me to think that these people that I was so angry about I'm not saying was right or wrong but like at the time that these people I didn't want to give them that power and so I even think about this now sometimes even like big business decisions Etc I A lot of times we say like Society tells us or Society trains us whatever but if you really like listen to it there's usually like two or three voices or maybe just one yeah and it's like sometimes you're surprised and so one of the exercises I do when I have these decisions where I'm like I feel like I'm pulled in multiple directions I think I think I the thing I know I want to do and the thing that I have been trained myself to do that's not the thing I want to do is I just try and name the person who's stopping me from doing it and so I remember there was like when I was selling one of the businesses this was like the first massive deal that we were going to go through I started playing these voices just one particular entrepreneur that I know and I was like he's going to think that this isn't enough money now mind you it was it was a big exit and it's totally made up in my mind but I I had to write down his name and say like will I let this person stop me from exiting this company and when I saw it it just seemed so small and I was like no I'm not going to give him that kind of pout over my life I'm going to give this guy is going to influence my decisions gonna change the rest of my life because of a voice I have in my head that he doesn't even know I'm thinking about him and you know what before we go anything it sounds so silly as you write it once you wrote it down it was silly but how strong are those Voices All of You Listening watching right now that says oh you're too young for this you're too old for this right all of it you had someone said you don't sell that company unless it's 200 million yeah and and you're getting lots of zeros yeah and you're like question until you wrote it down and go am I gonna allow him and I think I think that's a big takeaway today is if something is holding you back in your life and you think it's your own insecurities it of course it is or your own beliefs but write down I love them I'm going to do that next time is literally write down am I not going to do this because of and do you really want to give them that power and it's so interesting when we talk about insecurity because most insecurities belong to someone else and so it's like who owns this insecurity of mine yeah and why did I inherit it right because if if because insecurity comes from other people's judgments so like you can't be insecure about something unless there's someone else making this judgment otherwise there would be nothing to be insecure about and so naming who owns that insecurity all it takes it from this really amorphous thing to like it's John really yeah wow it is John and sometimes it takes a couple you're like no it's not my mom no it's not you know it's not my uncle you know you know what it's it's that my colleague he's I work with him every day and I think that if he if he knew I quit my job he would think I was like not cool or it's the guys I used to go to school with if they know that I quit my job they would see me as a loser like my senior year you're a dreamer yeah like it's not gonna work right and they have all these good jobs and like I'm going to quit my stable job to go do this thing and I used to think like there's gonna be a short-term time where they're all making more money than me and they can buy things that I can't so here's a quick question yeah if decisions of the opposite side like the main side is don't let people unqualify talk you out of what you want out of life your broke friend telling you how to fix your relationship right or a broke friend telling you how to do your business a single friend on the relationship right we know that what helps fuel the confidence to keep going right because we all question ourselves how many times have we both you're an inch away from signing the deal yeah starting the new you bought a company yesterday there's always those moments right before you stroke a check with lots of zeros or start a new company start a new relationship say I do say I don't yeah right this is enough or this is the beginning all of those moments I I believe I'm gonna digress here I believe pressure yeah at least with me when I'm under pressure I can Resort back to the man I used to be right I think I'm I'm growing if I'm not climbing I'm sliding I'm growing emotionally physically like spiritually uh and then you get under pressure and sometimes you take a step back and you make a decision of the man that you were running away from or want to grow from so if if you can be bold enough to take that uncomfortable action and say no I I'm gonna sell this company because it makes sense for me I'm not giving that power to John I'm not giving this power to my parents what keeps you in the game so you can continue to make better and better decisions for you so is this I want to make sure I understand the question uh there's the what makes me confident to make the next to own my own decision rather than listen to someone else versus what keeps me going in terms of the bigger goal yeah I think the first first one yeah so I'm a big believer and this is a little bit contrarian um that proof is the best type of evidence for a trait and so rather than say like I'm I'm honest I'm honest I'm honest but like you're a crook like all the evidence points to the fact that you're a crook like I think that when you say that on some level you don't believe you because you know that's not true yeah and so I try and look at okay what experiences or things I've done in the past can I transfer that are close enough to this new thing so if I built a sales team at a weight loss company and then I really want to do this new gig that's at a chiropractor joint and it's also building a sales team can I say that that skill is going to transfer I have high confidence that I'll be successful in this thing that would make sense for me if I had built six sales teams over my career I'd probably be even more confident right and so the thing is is like if I'm listening to this borrowing Confidence from another experience in my life and so the the problem is what do you do when you're at zero when you're like I'm not confident I haven't done anything good right I've got no achievements to my name Etc I think that you're delusional because it's like if you were able like all you have to do is chunk down and think okay well what did I what did I do like let's be real what did I do today that was good well I woke up okay cool I got out of bed okay well I showed up to work on time okay so I'm punctual you know what I always show up to work on time that's okay I do do that right and I respond to things pretty quick okay I do so I'm responsible so it's you chunk down until you're like okay what things can I say that I have proof that I'm good at and then those become things that you can stack on top of one another because it's not delusional because let's say let's say mom says you're not you're blah blah blah but you're like no no no no I hear you but I have proof so like I get you of your opinion I have facts and so my goal in life has always been to stack as much proof as I possibly can to support that I am who I say I am even if you have to embellish a little bit of that proof right like even if you say I know I only did it at this level oh yeah but that same thing could get compounded 10 times it just I didn't have the eyeballs yet or I didn't have the experience or the time or the time yeah right yeah I love that thought and so that was that was that's always been my goal was like can I Can I stack enough evidence to give enough proof that I am who I say I am and then so let me ask you when you want to make a decision if you stack enough proof you look at the evidence yeah and you say I'm going to be pragmatic and say I did it here I'm going to do it here yeah what keeps you moving forward with that decision when you make a decision I'm asking you can you make decisions you just go no matter what do you burn the boats or are you one step at a time this is proving itself because I just know one thing yeah there's a middle ground between burning the boats and tipping dipping your foot in yeah right take the island burn the boats or let me just put my foot in the water and see there's a middle ground yeah but I see sometimes where people are they don't realize I know we're going off in a different direction but I think this is really important they don't realize deep down they're waiting for it not to work they're pretending they're moving forward but they're actually looking for evidence of it not working so they could say see Alex wasn't a great partner or Bob's not that into it or nobody 50 years old wants to lose weight they don't care like they're they don't realize it's like when you're sick and you Google it like I do have a brain tumor right you're not looking for no it's a headache take a Tylenol right so how can we help people realize that you you can't you can't go into if you decide I'm going to be pragmatic because I have proof I have past experience I'm going to do it yes you want to test but you gotta go in looking for the right outcome yeah it's it's a really tough quote because like I see this even and you know what and this is everyone who's listening it happens at every level I talked to Founders who are doing 100 million dollars a year and I'm like well have you tried this and they're like yeah we tried that like we've tried this and they're like oh we tried that I tried to this oh we tried that and I'll Name six other things and I'm like oh okay you're right you're screwed you're just never gonna succeed and when I say it like that they're like well and I'm like well which is it yeah and all of a sudden because like some people like to be contrarian because of like that's their nature they just want to disagree they want to prove it wrong they want to buy the course attend the workshop and then prove that they're a special Snowflake and I think you just look at like you can look at yourself in the mirror and be like you're right you are special Civic you are never going to succeed now what and I think on some level if you get if you if you get to that point then it's like well you have nothing to lose and I think in some ways that makes you more dangerous than anyone yeah and it's it's funny because like it's all about how you frame the position right and I used to tell because we had a big friend was listening like we had a big gym licensing company so we had thousands of locations and people would try and come into space and be like well how am I going to compete with you you've got this Big Brand blah blah blah and I was like you don't realize the advantage you have because and I'm gonna I'm gonna wrap this up to the point I was like if you're if I were you and I'm coming up against me I'm gonna say you're never going to see Alex Alex is never going to is Never Gonna help you with your gym is never gonna do X Y and Z you're just a number to him he's got this massive thing to me you're gonna get me it's gonna be personalized I'm gonna be super responsive I was like that's your position I was like on the flip side my position is gonna say I've been doing this for a decade I've got more success stories than every single other person put together and are you gonna trust this kid in his mom's basement who has no track record compared to me both both positions have advantages and so right now the thing is is that if you're day one you never get this back but you get to be underestimated there's no advantage to being overestimated unless you're weak right um but right now no one will see you coming if you have nothing going for you it's another way of saying that you have nothing to lose and so it means that you have endless shots on goal and so you should be the most prone to taking action because there's nothing holding you back what do you have nothing it's just it's literally just voices in your head from your mom who say that you're not going to win and you say you're right Mom and then you keep doing it anyways yeah I love in ogmadino's book I love the world's greatest salesman that's one of my favorite books and he talks about in one section most people let their mindset control their actions what if you let your actions determine your mindset do it when you don't feel like doing it move forward anyway and I think that's that's the part I want to share today before we get into what's next is how do you get the momentum when you're scared it's the uncomfortable action like and I would just say it's whatever it takes to get you to move forward if it's saying thank you for the the the the telling me I'm not gonna make it I'm an underdog that means no one will see me coming I must do it anyway like whatever it takes for you to move forward we must yeah and I think that's why I love these conversations because each thing will impact somebody says today's enough today's the day where i'm not settling today's day I will say yes I will say no I will move forward one thing before we move forward um I want to ask you is dude you're in amazing shape I worked out with you it's really difficult to work out with you you're so freaking ripped you you've sold your company you're buying other companies you decided to go on social media dude it's been fun watching you you've skyrocketed to the top you're all over the place um which is awesome what's one thing no one would know that still makes you scared at night when no one's around because most people think when they see success that you've killed all the demons there's no dragons left to slay yeah but is there still something that goes man I could go broke or this could go wrong or I'm not good enough or I think um it has it has it it obviously I think it shifts over time it does I think um and I think the answer if you'd asked me a year ago would have been different than it is right now um but the thing is that that keeps me up is not being good enough to accomplish what my dreams are now so like I there's there's I my dreams have expanded because of the proof that I have now so now it's like I'm setting goal posts that are bigger than I can really imagine and my fear is getting to the end of my life and not having accomplished those and then thing like I guess I wasn't good enough to do that thing and I think that like and I think I've had a little bit of time to be like all right is that really you know and I you know I play the mental game with myself but I would say on some level that's still a thing that um that keeps me up yeah and the reason I ask you that is because I have similar figures and no one would ever think that and it doesn't mean it should stop you from moving forward it doesn't stop you you still get up every day you still love what you do you still move forward you still make mistakes you still have some fears you still wake up someone and go what the hell am I doing right isn't enough is that maybe when you've sold your last company you could have been done yeah you and Layla could be doing whatever you wanted you went right back in investing the money and buying companies so what you just said about taking the action anyway right I think that going back to what we were saying earlier about giving yourself that proof that evidence it's like all you have to do is get the first piece of evidence and so it's like if you just take one action then you can start labeling yourself as like I am somebody who takes action because I have this proof right here and so it's it's just stacking and then you stack two or three of those and you're like you know what I'm on a streak and then you're like I am the type of person who does these things because and you said the mindset preceding the action right yeah this is this is the point that I was trying to get to um if the actions lead to the mindset then it means that the actions give you the evidence of the mindset you should have and so it's a really good point right I love that and so that gives like the actions become your evidence and so if you're like well I have no evidence then it's like then you can make evidence and that's how and guess what that's how everyone else did it what do they say about entrepreneurs you make up and you make it real yeah right I mean that's that's really what we do and we and to fuel that is the is the evidence you know if if anybody could see our it's funny it's kind of like we have fun alter egos sometimes when we text oh yeah I'm going bro I'm done it's over can I borrow money we had this joke about that we help each other whenever we can when it comes to our businesses just simple stuff when we brainstorm and I say hey if you sell your company for that much money I want everything to the right of the decimal and I still have the check I think you sent me a check for 46 cents so it was awesome I was hoping for 99 cents but as we joke there is truth in everything right um we joke oh my God you know what if what if the the dollar collapses yeah what if this country keeps the media and politicians keep making us think we should hate each other and we're so polarized that we're not focusing on the big prize we're worrying about the little things when other countries are exponentially growing and other companies starving like like there's there's so many things that we're distracted with it and right now people have a lot of worries are we going in to a recession could it be a depression could the dollar actually be replaced in 20 years 50 years two years yeah I do right these some people are thinking I don't even that's I don't care about that and some people are worried every day about but there's so many things right now that are have been uncertain especially since covet happened three years ago and um you know it's like the rules of the game seem to be changing and I think it's caused this level of insert uncertainty and fear that I again I said earlier if when you're under pressure you kind of resort back sometimes when you're in your pressure you freeze yeah so I don't want to get into if the dollar is going to collapse and if we should invest in crypto or gold or real estate or companies or t-bills that could we could we could spend days on that I know but how do you get people how would you suggest people get clarity to navigate through this that's kind of the Upstream question it's a big question but wherever I go now it depends on where somebody is and what their economics are but most questions people will first say is Dean what should I do with my cash or can I actually make cash right now or should I actually want dollars should I invest in India and China right but Upstream how do you get people to get out of that uncertainty mode so they can make clear decisions so I I have a couple mental exercises that I actually go through for this um and so I try and reframe reality in a couple of ways one of them is I try and play out the absolute hypothetical worst scenario right and so the worst scenario is I die okay yeah then I won't be worried about it because I'll be dead right it won't affect me okay so like one degree less than that it's like okay well what if I go like I'm I'm reduced to the I have absolutely nothing it's like okay well real talk there are homeless kitchens and there are there are places that I could that I could crash and eat and whatever I'm like okay so I probably won't starve so actually probably won't die in the actual worst case scenario and when you look at people for subjective well-being in poorer countries there's often people who are happier on average than us in the US and so I think I reframe it as like well what problem are we solving and so if it's like well I'm worried about AI is it going to take my job and and will I lose all the money it's like well you'll probably be just about as happy and unhappy as you are right now because all of those things presuppose a single assumption which is that your circumstances dictate your mood or your happiness and so if and you all you have to do is listen to you know anybody who's made lots of whatever whatever the thing is for you they got the Grammy they made the movie that whatever it is right they all get there and they're like it didn't make me any happier yeah right change the thing and so we asked these questions about what if all these circumstances change but it has an underlying assumption that because the circumstances change I'm going to become less happy and that's what our fear comes from but if we disconnect our circumstances because if uh Victor Frankl in the Holocaust and I think about these examples because like I try and think of hypothetical extremes or like the millions of people who have been slaves in general across countries across time periods they all somehow actually manage to have kids survive you know like and keep doing and don't get me wrong I'm saying it's horrible but I use it as an example of how bad circumstances can be and yet humans continue to survive and so the you the problem mind right will always find new things to look at because it wants to keep you alive right because that's its objective but it doesn't want to keep you happy and so if we can just simply break the connection of the underlying assumption that whatever happens whether it's the dollar or the Yen or AI takes over the world because I I genuinely think I'm like well if AI takes completely over everything I'm like then my 401k doesn't matter too much right right so like I worry about these things that in the hypothetical extreme that I'm also worried about wouldn't matter and in my opinion I'll probably be just as happy or as unhappy as I am right now or as I have evolved in my awareness which will be disconnected from outside circumstance and so that's that's what but why I asked you because I know so many times that we've had conversations you have mental models or a framework around certain thinking because that that is so powerful thinking about the worst case scenario and if that actually did happen would you be happier or or less happy and the fact of the matter is I don't think it changes at all I'm going to give you one so everybody who's listening to this right now you remember when you were younger you were poor and you had nothing and guess what you still probably even think about that as the good old days yeah true story and so like why are we so afraid of going back to a scenario that in the future today we might be in the good old days yeah and it's like it's a weird mental phrase and you know what no the crazy part of that is if you're living in a future that could go wrong you're preventing yourself in the present from being all you can be yeah totally right and if you live in the present saying these might be the good old days you will take more risk you will have more courage to move forward you will make bold uncomfortable decisions in the moment rather than sitting on your hands hoping things don't go sideways one of my buddies my closest friend is a philosopher I know that sounds ridiculous but yeah that's like pretty much what he does um and he gave me this Frame called the frame of the veteran and so imagine you lose all your money right so it's a terrible thing actually let's go let's go let's go I'm gonna go micro really quickly and then we'll scale it up so let's say you're in traffic right and you hate traffic traffic sucks okay well if you've no if you if you're not in traffic normally and then you're in traffic it's terrible but if every time you got in the car from here until the day you die there was always traffic what would happen you would just get used to it yeah right and so you become a veteran it's just something that like this is just how it always is and so if you can if your mind can mentally weather itself to get to that point then it means you can apply that same frame to this moment that's inconvenient I had this this shirt that I liked a lot and the the my cleaning person like messed it up it sounds ridiculous and I thought about this and I was like well if every time and it was just shrunk too much that's all it was yeah and I was like well if every time I washed a shirt it always had this level of shrinking I was like would I really care I was like well no I guess not I was like okay I'm done with it and that was it but like I just remember that was the first time I ever used the frame of the veteran because you just told me and then I just got to apply it immediately and so I just give it a shot if you're like really stressing about stuff so I I love that framework and I always think about I heard Ed my let's say this once I always use it imagine I always thought of Imagine meeting the the person you could have been at you're at the end of your life yeah and my let's I think he said one time he's like imagine if God played you a video of the man or the woman you could have been if you would have been bold and if if you were at that moment of someone you know God has an iPhone pulls it out and said hey Alex if you weren't so afraid if you didn't go against what your parents said if you went and been a doctor yeah okay but this is who you would have been like oh my God what would you wish yeah let me go back and do it again yeah wish granted right if we can put ourselves in that moment yeah we can give ourselves that wish of saying no no this is not one of those things I want to regret at the end yeah right all right I'm gonna I'm gonna switch completely here love this conversation um sales influence impact you know persuasion whatever you want to call it so many businesses no matter if you're two employees 200 2 000 five five thousand a year to 50 million a year every company needs Focus exponential growth shifting Evolution innovation in their marketing and sales but so many startups and people launching their business not only they apprehensive they could be apprehensive the sales they could be they they were in a I feel we are in a in an error where sales is considered bad when it simultaneously it is the oxygen for every successful business that exists I have fallen in love with selling because of impact and have converted it to service in your life your evolution of sales what has been the biggest lift how have you fallen in love with sales you're amazing at what you do you provide an incredible product in everything you do what drives you and what could drive others to fall in love with sales through your lens so I see sales as helping the person you're speaking to realize that they are in power and the three things like if we CA like you know the more you sell the more you hear the same excuses right and so in a lot of ways selling is the first conversation to helping someone make decisions to help themselves and so there are three major buckets that that people use to blame right we said earlier about the where the finger blame goes so does the power and so the widest area of this is although think about it like an onion all right this is the best analogy I can give the outer layer is circumstances so they're going to blame money they're going to blame time they're going to blame some particular aspect of the thing that they're buying that's not perfect for them whatever it is right but that's the first layer yeah underneath of that they're going to blame other people they're gonna blame their partner their spouse their kids their wife their co-worker or whatever right that's the second layer and then the final layer is that you have somebody so if I if I make you realize like okay well the difference between self-made Millionaires and you is that you both started at zero so what's the difference they decided to do something right all of a sudden like like you can you can start breaking down each of these beliefs and with other people it's like I'll give you a common one it's like my spouse right my spouse won't let me do this it's like okay well let's play it out well if every time you want to make these decisions that are going to help yourself and every time your spouse says no three years from now I was like how are you guys gonna feel it's like I'll you probably resent your spouse because they've held you back this whole time and so what happens is you're actually giving your spouse the responsibility over your success in life that's not fair for them it's not fair to them not fair to your marriage and I was like so you're literally you're planting the seeds right now for a resentment tree to grow later and so what I think you want is you're you're thinking you need permission but we were asking well you actually need a support I love those two layers and what's the center piece the center layer is avoidance is so now you're talking to a person in power so it's like okay it's not the time it's not the money it's you know someone else yeah it's not other people what they try and then do is like I'm gonna think about it I'm not sure right it's avoidance now we could get into like is it shame is it fear is it self-doubt like whatever it is all I know is that they avoid the decision that I can observe they avoid the decision they just try they and so at this point we then at least if I'm trying to sell something to someone or trying to help someone make a decision I help them make the decision which is well what would it take in order for you to feel good about this and at what point is it unreasonable for you to not believe that this would work and so this is like for example if I had it's because I saw the zillion gym memberships back in my day yeah um if I said if someone's like well I'm just not I I need to think about it I'm like cool well what are the main things that you used to make the decision and the reality is that you think you need that right you think you need time what would you really want is information and so we conflate time for information so if I have more time I must get more information I was like but I'm your only source of information I was like so what's your main concern and let me give you that information right and sometimes you just ask like and like there's a lot of different ways of asking the same thing but just saying like what's the thing you don't want to have happen if you do this what are you afraid of having happen wow so good and a lot of times it just pierces right to the point where like I just don't want to buy another thing and my husband you know let me right and you're like real peace right and then you're like I got it I feel you I was like so what if we do this and like and then and then you can now you actually just have a real conversation exactly now we're not smoke screening we're actually getting to the real stuff and the thing is is that if you have like I love this this quote I don't remember I heard it but it was it was closer to ask hard questions right and so most people hate sales because they were not sold well like true sales doesn't feel like sales it just feels like making an informed decision with somebody who is an expert who helps you make the best decision for you yeah and you know what and this is what I what I train all the sales people to do I was like my goal is that you help the person that you're speaking to decide not that they buy make a decision even if the decision is absolutely no they made a decision yes and they walk out right not the miserable maybe right reasonable maybe right right that one down right another year of almost right who wants that and so it's like we like and this is again I I've trained a lot of sales teams and whatnot and so I'm like you have to train for no you have to expect no and this really comes with anything in life is that like if if every person you just said hey you want to buy the thing and they said yes I was like then you're not required we could just put up a page you know people just go on Amazon and click buy right and so we have to expect that the people who are coming to us and I train a lot of weight loss sales teams um if they could do it on their own they wouldn't be here right so we have to expect that they're going to have some demons in the closet that we gotta help we we like think about it like this you're side by side with them you've got a sword and they don't and they're like the monsters are in here and you're like all right let's open the doors right and like that's the role of the salesman it's like you can kill these demons in front of them be like it's not your husband's responsibility right it's not the fact that you don't have time because I can promise you there's someone who's had it worse who's done better yeah right and so you can you can have those real conversations and so for me that's where I get passionate about it because I think because real sales in real sales is service I mean yes you're serving that person because if it's a gym membership they've been putting off getting themselves in shape forever and if you quit before you get to the root cause the peeling back the onion to get to the avoidance to the avoidance leads to the root cause of why they're not going to the gym if as a salesperson you got to solve that and they were in the gym then you did good for the World by selling and in every business that I've been a part of every business I consult with if that sales is service mindset doesn't exist if it's just what is the average ticket how much are we getting what is that lead worth I know that company's not going to make it yeah but when you and you know this because you're buying companies faster than anyone I've ever seen when you go into a place where they're heart centered and service oriented and they have an amazing sales floor to get people to take the action it changes their lives that's a company I put money in so I'm going to give you guys like the secret like the real like the key ingredient to making this work and it's not it's not it's not like some words it's not because the thing is is that humans are exceptionally good at smelling out when someone's lying we've here we've thousands of years of evolution to see if someone's gonna trick you and then you know steal your food or whatever it is like we're actually really good and intuitively like you don't know if someone's lying but you're like I just feel off about it yeah right and so there's one thing that I know well there's two things that can fix it one is years and years of training of trying to fix your tonality pausing at the right time speaking fast if I really want to get someone really excited or slowing down so that you really pay attention to what I'm saying right now right like you can shift how you're feeling like pros can do that because they've trained for it but if you're a beginner there's one thing that's even more powerful than that which is just you just believe in it and so here's my example for you have you ever bought something that you were like this is amazing right and when you go to your aunt you're like you got to try these shoes on they're so are like I got this new thing that covers yeah and the thing is is the way you talk about it that's what gives you conviction and I'll ask a question that might you know trigger some people but um if you've ever met somebody who who found a new religion right and they're like on fire about the religion if they say it enough sometimes the person who believes more you're like maybe I'm wrong about this depending on how convicted they are and so the thing that will fix your tone will fix the things that you will say is actually believing in the product and so we see this with sales teams and I can tell you I can fix a sales team rather than training them on drilling obstacle overcomes and things like that by simply saying what's happened in the last seven days 14 days 30 days that made you believe in this less and solving for that and sometimes there's a legitimate problem with a product or a service and it's like we're on it and then we start giving them updates every day of the things that we're doing to solve the problem that they brought up so right so it's like we're just fixing the act like we're getting to the heart of the fall in love with what you're selling right because if you don't believe in it you know what you shouldn't sell it that's the real like if you don't believe in it you shouldn't sell it and the problem is so many people sell things they don't believe in to make a paycheck and that's why sales get a bad name exactly yeah so when people it's funny I love I love I love listening I love being a student and I love hearing this when people say to me how did you guys do the biggest launch how do you so good at sales what I always say is because I love what I do so much that I feel bad if they don't get it yeah and and people are always looking people say give me the secret to say like just what you said is it to slow down is it the speed up yeah I've never studied any of that right I've just fallen in love again back to ogmond Dino's book the world's greatest salesman is second the most important one is I will meet this day with love and he said they might not like my clothes they might not even like my product they might not like my voice my complexion but if I'm in my head saying I love you yeah I know it sounds a little hokey but if they're saying I love you there's no they way they could say no to me because if you meet this day with love if you don't just love your product don't just love the the success of your company you actually love the person you're serving yeah you wouldn't sell them something that sucks but you also wouldn't do them the disservice of them not having it right if you if you fall in love with the movie you want everybody you love to go see it you fall in love with going vegan you are praising from the roof my arthritis went away I feel better goby again yeah right when you love a product or a service or the company you're launching or the coaching program you're not selling you're feeling bad by not persuading someone to take that action and when I see that passion in someone or a company I know where they're going top the number one salesman for like the last five years at my old company you could listen to his sales calls and he was unbelievably persistent but it wasn't in a pushy or coercive way I would watch these sales calls and someone you know someone would be on like their sixth now and he would just he would take his glasses off and he'd rub his face and he's like Pete I'm not giving up on you man he's like you said that you're struggling to pay your mortgage right now and like I know because I have all of this proof behind me that like there's something that's stopping you emotionally from doing this like help like let's work on this together let's figure this out decision right exactly and so the thing is is it what like I love saying this is that it's not sales is a dance not a fight right you're just you're just working with the person and the thing is I if you're ever selling a physical environment you always want to be on the same side of the table because it really signals what the relationship should be which is we're on the same side of the table here I'm trying to help you make a good decision and you know what and this is the thing that about having Integrity as a salesperson is that if you find out while you're talking to them that it's not a good fit then you will be able to you will sell so much better if you let a couple people go that you know it's not going to be a good fit for because then you know why you're doing it because then you have more conviction in yourself that it's not that I just sell every person with a heartbeat I sell the people that I think really need this thing and some people might not need this thing because they have a different demon they got a slightly you know what then make them a recommendation because you do care about them rather than the sale yeah so conviction over commission like that's the and that's at the end of the day it boils back to that love thing that service thing that caring thing and it is the unfair advantage to sales like I love I love hearing your perspective you're so good at sales uh Alex I've I've watched this training I've watched you train it I watch you talk about it but it always starts with that caring yeah and I've never met anybody consistent listen I can see someone who's got a business doing a million a year and when I watch them and I'm not saying a million years bad please I I'm not a millionaire is amazing but they want to go to 10. yeah and I could tell the way they sell I could tell what they've rehearsed they don't believe in what they're doing and in my head I know you will never pass that there's no way Beyond where you are unless you change how you feel if you sell someone and then think gotcha because what happens is one you'll Foster a whole Army of people who hate you but secondly like that like if you have any ethics at all which most people do I actually think a lot more people have ethics than other people give credit for it starts to eat at you and Dean and I have been doing this business game enough to see we've seen people bottle rocket their way up and then fizzle Bottle Rock it up and then fizzle they create another new product every every 12 weeks because right if it's crypto they got a crypto program if it's if it's AI there's a new AI program rather than going deep falling in love and actually making Transformations so if if you're in business starting a business thinking about business even in your career what if tomorrow if we challenge you to say how can I fall in love with this business how can I fall in love with my product and if you don't love it here's what I'll tell you just go fix it go fix it I love this so I'm gonna go real deep on this real quick so it's usually like I'm I look at a lot of businesses every day it's usually the biggest most obvious thing is that the like the sandwich shop isn't doing well they're like it's our marketing it's it's the location I was like your sandwiches just aren't that good that's all it is they're just not they're just not good enough that's all like they're like we just need more customers I was like if you serve the customers you had well enough you wouldn't have this conversation with me you'd already have a line out the door every day at lunch when you have the same I mean we're using a sandwich yeah when you have a killer sandwich yeah what do you do you post it yeah anybody wants to see a post about food like please why right but you do compared to good and you and I both know some companies we talked about one earlier that's a really good marketer yeah but the company's kind of like a calendar that you put spaghetti in yeah they market so good but they keep falling through the holes because their products not amazing yeah and this is that this is at least my hack for getting conviction okay so like I my next book's coming out um I spent 2 000 hours writing it wow and my editor spent 1500 hours so it's 3 500 hours of time went into this thing and I'm not saying that for the book but I'm saying my understanding of the level of effort that is required to make something that is world class excellent has continued to move up my bar and my expectation of self and so like the guy who has the sandwich shop I sometimes I sit down at places I'm like how did someone think this is my life's work and they made this sandwich I'm like if I were gonna open a sandwich up I'd spend a year trying every sandwich I possibly could and thinking like how can I make I'd go to the best I would drive to the best sandwich shops and think like okay how do they set up their menu what are the few items that they have like how do they Source their ingredient like it's doing the actual work because the thing is is that when you do that work and I'm about to invest in a company that does no strips so it's kind of exciting because I've I've like you've had no strips on my whole life yeah I know and I was like and I was telling this guy the the the the Creator and I was like this is what we need to look at in terms of how long the residue stays on your nose he's like and I was like how how much coverage it has uh how long it sticks I was like I think the plastic seems to be firmer and I'm like naming all these things he's like no one has ever broken down our Pro with all this detail and the thing is is that once you fix every single one of those things you make sure it's toasted for exactly 17 seconds and you make sure it gets flipped at this way and this time why because you did it at 30 you did it at five and you found out that 17 was perfect when you go to talk about the sandwich you'll have the conviction that's what I was going to say is and people don't realize they're saying well I have a good product but it doesn't sell I is that true yeah because when you know that product is the best the conviction goes through the roof sales go through the roof what a what a I'm so glad I asked you that question about sales today because no because listen you see more companies than me I'm in a place right now I don't have time to consult I don't have to I invest in about a company a month but small I don't take them over I just invest them but we have so much opportunity coming our way yeah and I see the companies that are stuck especially for years when they asked me to consult on sales or marketing yeah it's because they don't have conviction they and it's such a great analogy I'm going to think about this for the rest of my life they're selling a crappy sandwich and trying to overlook trying to fix it with better marketing the magical money machine better that better opt-in funnels better upsell process like no just go fix the sandwich right and that's the work that has to be confronted and that's the work that most like because if you got into the sandwich business because you wanted to make money then that's why you're not passionate about like I can talk about no strips all day because I've I've had two nose surgeries like I just breathe bad and so I know all the different things I've tried every single brand and I've done them all for 30 40 50 whatever days and I can tell you all the differences about them because it's I'm passionate you can see how I'm talking about like I'm passionate about it which is ridiculous but like but if you have that for the product or service that you're you're getting into you'll know the details well it's why mastermind.com with Tony and I yeah we've been in the self-education industry for so long it changed our lives it made us better humans it allowed us to take care of our family we get to feed you know between him and him way more than me but hundreds of millions of people like we get to do this cool stuff so when I talk about selling what you know or creating an information product or I'm not it's my life I I would I'd be fixing cars if that didn't come into my life so it's not if my conviction is an 11 out of 10. yeah I'm gonna give you this line for everybody who's listening to this so conviction is the like if you've gotten anything from what Dean and I were just talking about is that conviction is the number one secret ingredient to sales is that you actually have to believe the thing is it's the first person you always have to sell is yourself and most people actually aren't sold number one number two is that conviction itself is not binary it's not do you believe or do you not believe it's how much do you believe how deep do you believe wow right yeah and so you can look at a sales team and I can say like he's a he's a two out of ten he's a four out of ten if I were to just judge them based on how much they believe in the product that would map significantly more to what their closing percentage was more than anything else wow but the cool thing is is that because conviction is measurable and it is changeable it's also something that you can work on and you can outwork yourself doubt so if you're not like if if I didn't think the book was good that I would work on the book until I thought it was good and then my doubt would go away because I have evidence wow that I've done this thing to make it exceptional and so if someone then says I think your book's I would just say like well here's all the evidence of all the things that I did like I reworked back all the way he's talking about the beginning 100 and so I want to say your first book it was purifier I have recommended that book Thank you more than any other book especially when it comes to marketing and sales what's the name of your new book coming out can you share it or not no no I can't 100 million dollar leads 100 million dollar leads yeah yeah it's when does that come out July July so yeah make sure you put that in your calendar how can people follow you uh we're not done yet but I just want people to be able to follow you uh I mean if you're on the podcast I have a podcast called the game uh Alex you can just type my name in but pretty much on every social media platform so Twitter LinkedIn Instagram YouTube If you don't have his first book 100 million dollar offers yeah it's on Amazon it's on Amazon go get it and and be on the lookout okay and so you know it's we made it uh as cheap as Amazon will let me make it and make it a book still so if you if you're strapped for cash it's 99 Cents for the Kindle like it's just I just wanted as many people to have it as possible well and a lot of people got it so yeah nice work no it is it is my go-to when somebody under ask me questions I'm like go get that book uh we've about in the last four or five podcasts people have asked me a question a lot of times in life same as you people are always like damn how did you do this how'd you do that so I know you said earlier you got one for me oh what pain do you cherish I knew you'd get a good one I knew that would be good what pain do I cherish um I know the answer though incredibly I know the answer is uh so I'm gonna make it light for a second so Alex and I are the co-founders of the DLB club uh daddy's little boy um we both had a time in our lives when we wanted to go for our own thing that our dads weren't so supportive I won't go deep on it and we have some similar uh life stories of that'll never work you'll it'll you know so there was one day Alex I don't even know how it started but I I said to you I said I called you daddy's little boy or something and we just we laughed so hard I think I dropped my phone yeah but if we take the funny part out of joking about the daddy's little boy club um that sounded weird but when I was um when I was about 12 years old my my father was the youngest of 12. I'm gonna take just two minutes to give you context this question um when I was my dad was the youngest of 12 was physically abused he was sexually abused come from an old school Italian family so he did not get help he just suffered through it and my dad had so much resentment for his own father who knocked his teeth out like that he he was confrontational with everybody and couldn't control never physically beat me but I had a bleeding ulcer at 11 years old I threw up blood at 11 because my dad would fight with everyone if we went to a restaurant and the waiter was rude five minutes later my dad would be on the floor punching a guy in the face like a flag guy doesn't hold the flag fast enough my dad's on the side of the road fighting a construction guy like like my dad hit a guy with a bat in front of me when I was like and I I hate confrontations that I don't watch fights I can't I don't watch you know extreme fight I watch none of it because I still don't like it long story short when I was 12 my mom got remarried to a guy who was amazing his name was Lenny Rizzo it was her high school sweetheart she married this guy he was the most amazing stepdad had stepbrother stepsisters got a Mongoose BMX bike that we couldn't afford before that I lived in a cul-de-sac it was like I went from the trailer park to oh yeah right and my dad couldn't handle it and there was one day my dad my stepdad my dad was screaming me yelling at me I was shaking and I could talk about this stuff now my dad's 87 still alive and I talk about this in front of him he knows and and I know he's got the he's got a pound of regret a thousand pounds of regret but anyway my stepdad says to my dad he's in Florida we're in Upstate New York he said hey why don't you calm down you don't know what this is doing to your son you can't see your son until you calm down my dad got in the car drove 14 hours straight to our house with a bat knocked windows out of cars yeah we got so scared I know it's a long story but I want to share this with you because most people don't understand we all have our so we get in a motorhome and we hide from my dad for a month we're going from campground to Campground and we can't go home we're afraid right so finally I get my older sister we walk downtown this is how long ago it was I bring a quarter go to a paid phone and call my dad he picks up the phone where the hell are you where tell me where you are right now and like Dad just gotta stop and like you know sometimes you got to mature up I was Manning up at 12 or 11 whatever it was and I said how will this stop God I can't take it anymore and I was afraid for my mom I thought he was going to kill her like I didn't know I don't think he would but I was afraid he threatened he was going to kill her I thought he was gonna yeah I know this is getting deep but I wanna I wanna answer this question and I said he said move in with me I'll leave her alone for the rest of her life I walked back said Mom moving in with Daddy she's like are you insane no I said I am you can't stop me I called him up he's picking me up I walk back down to pay Booth my father picked me up I moved in with my dad I moved in with my dad and when I got there he didn't have heat in his house because he couldn't afford it and he had an electric heater plugged in and at night he was sleeping in the bathroom because a little electric heater could eat the bathroom slept in the bathroom for six months with my dad never told my mom said it was fine and my dad literally I realized Now That I'm Older bipolar whatever you want to call a little bit of schizophrenia would be the greatest man in the world let me drive to school at 15 years old taught me how to hunt fish do all kinds of cool things and also the guy that gave me a bleeding ulcer long story short the pain of when my dad lost it was so bad I would shake and and be fearful and I thought it was the worst thing in the world but over time by the time I was 14 or 15 I could read my dad's mood I could feel his emotions and I knew how to treat him in advance so I could keep him out of Crazy Paws thanks Paul and be more of the dad that I could love and at the time I thought what a burden for a kid my age I have to deal this I can't tell my mom can't tell my sister because it'll cause and I was afraid if I told him he would kill my mom like that's how serious it was for a 12 year old a 14 year old now I look back that was the greatest gift in the world God gave me I feel I can go in front of an audience of 30 000 or next week I'll be in front of an audience of a half a million I could go from a half a million people and I think I can feel what they need and it's because I had to feel what my dad needed I had to do it through empathy and compassion it wasn't just a normal father-son relationship and I think I get to sell the way I sell I get to care the way I care I get to build I built 13 different companies I get to do all that because of that I went through so it took me a long time to get there and that was a long answer but hopefully that helped somebody today it was a real answer yeah so man I appreciate you so much thanks for being a friend thanks for all you do for the world the last couple podcasts as well I'm just getting in the in the groove of this and I thank God for all your listeners thank you for sharing go less listen to the last three you got great ones Matthew McConaughey was amazing Trent Shelton was amazed there's so many good ones go listen the last three uh make sure you um share it with a friend we'd love to get this out there we do these podcasts for free for you if you love it share it with somebody um but lastly I'd love to ask if there's someone in your life you'd like to thank whether it was something they did wrong that inspired you or somebody that just is the gas to your engine or the wind behind your sail who would you like to think it's a Layla yeah yeah I think I know that for sure yeah I mean I mean it's just it's honestly of all the things that we that you know we I already think this way like we have accomplished because it's been you know she and I even though I had businesses before her um like I think I think our marriage is rarer than our business success in terms of like percentage of people who who you know do anything um and so I'm very grateful for that because for the women who are listening or the guys actually everyone um I had a decent amount of success when she and I met and pretty much within like three or four months after we met uh she went all in on me and then I lost everything um and I didn't just lose everything once I actually lost everything twice uh and it's it's a story we'll tell it another time um but at the like the absolute rock bottom of that whole period of time I actually told her I thought she should leave me I was like I because I'm self-aware enough I was like listen there are better guys out there who will treat you like you know I respect her I cared about I was like we're cool like if you leave like I'm good like word I respect you and I and I was trying to sell her on leaving me and she grabbed my chin and she pulled it towards me and she was like I would sleep with you under a bridge if it came to that and like I think wow that kind of conviction like we talk about conviction right to go full circle is that in some ways like she sold me on me uh and so she was like I guess that was her you know burning the boats I'm sleeping at her parents house people I'm not we're not married yet I'm I'm just the guy she met on the internet who lost everything and now we're crashing at her parents house for a little bit like real winner and that's the moment where she's like I'll sleep with you under bridge if it comes to that and I think that that I think every guy stands the power of that I have that in my relationship and I feel Beyond blessed that I could answer the same way but I get to see that in you it's not a you guys don't have an Instagram relationship it's a no it's a it's an amazing connection and I knew you'd say that you led me on no yeah no she's so that's to Layla because she's and Layla if you're listening you are awesome Alex thank you so much man I appreciate you coming in today to be here in person and thank you again for watching the own your future podcast again if you love it listen to the last three share it and we have a newsletter at deansnewsletter.com see you next time [Music] thank you

Channel: Dean Graziosi

Views: 98,427

Keywords: #Alex Hormozi, #alexhormozi, #Alex Hormozi Interview, #interview, #podcast, #deangraziosi, #Dean Graziosi interview, #mindset, #entrepreneurship, building a business, sales and marketing, #marketing, #salestraining, #motivation, #personalgrowth, #personaldevelopment, alex hormozi, build a business, selling online, marketing, how to sell, sales tips, sales training, business advice, entrepreneurship

Id: xwimKNyNbLo

Length: 61min 45sec (3705 seconds)

Published: Sun May 07 2023