Superstore Moments but they get Progressively Darker

I told him how Mateo and I are BFFs Tay Tay and teen teen the Squad wait you talked to Richard too yeah and I said how Mateo's always serving up the tea like when he told that lost little girl that she was better off now because her mommy was hot trash classic Squad tea [Music] [Applause] you guys are missing out what a unique experience it must be moving around a store on Wheels Amy is pregnant the baby is Adams I was the first to know because I am her best friend and Justine no one went to your bar crawl because you are unpleasant to be around unpleasant in bed well well well look who banged the pharmacist yeah I guess sometimes Kermit goes home with Beaker does anyone have something they'd like to say okay fine Sal and I are having sex in the dressing rooms jerusha I want you to go pack a gold bag and uh go outside wait by the mailbox and when you see my card get a running start and then jump through the window okay because I'm not gonna be able to stop oh and see if any of our neighbors have a shotgun you can borrow I'll see you soon Dennis did I put you on go backs or did I tell you to stand around crying about your dead dog all day get in the game we're understaffed who wants to play Crazy scabies Floor shorts I guess there is enough of us we could play hassle the fishmonger but we'd have to move the couch yeah no one's ever heard of any of those games seriously none of you well what did you do as kids when your mom was out with the men from the bank you've been to prison right yeah I mean like barely long enough to form lifelong friendships doing there he's behind eyes soft skin cute tummy you'd be very popular root beer fixes everything gallstones pink eye it'll clean your toilet it's kind of the perfect food oh oh oh okay I can feel this fizzing oh yeah that means it's working I heard about your living situation and if you want you can crash with me that's really nice Marcus thank you yes now the horsemen living together partying hard luring ladies back to the pad I'm sorry luring we heard about you two about how you don't want Myrtle to have a good afterlife what no we Laney make sure Tate's not trying to sell our customers timeshares Todd keeps out at least 100 feet away from women's wear and women in general if possible we can all go back to work um unless anyone wants to file an official Complaint of racial bias Sandra I often feel uncomfortable in the stock room there's a man there Sal who makes comments about my breasts yeah okay what you're talking about is sexual harassment and that's a whole other video okay it's just that sometimes he calls me at home yeah we're not gonna watch another video Sandra no I don't know how you're supposed to take it when you find out the woman you're dating is pregnant with another man's child you should have asked me I've had that conversation multiple times oh fun fact the dude that voiced MC cool Cloud committed suicide in 1994. no it was terrible that makes sense attention employees make your way to the break room for a harassment meeting Shoppers go about your business This Is A Private Matter concerning our floor manager Amy and a 14 year old boy Tina gnome sweetie you're gonna come out of that tent okay hun now whether you're conscious or unconscious is up to you really gonna throw a bug bomb in there no I also think we need parking lot buddies so that no one has to walk through their car alone at night I'll be paired with anyone but Sarah that girl's got like a huge restraining order against me Marcus yep I'm a Hunter some people like to hunt elk or deer eye on people in your head is going on my wall that was the coroner's office a gas main blew in a Shoe Land oh God which Shoe Land who cares they're all the same the point is they're not going to be here for a while oh come on I don't know Jody I didn't ask the man every little question in the world how long are they going can not with you right now chicks are going to be banging down the door and we'll be like uh please ladies one at a time one at a time is in there's there's two of us and one of them awesome congratulations hey guys I'm pregnant well I could tell already I compared the pictures what pictures what pictures oh my God he's so cute my ovaries are exploding it's like scrambled eggs anyone okay uh well who hasn't shared yet uh Garrett hasn't oh Garrett oh no I've lived a blessed life I have something my first apartment was in a pet cemetery you're saying sorry if Lori is being a wouldn't the truly sexist thing be for me to not call her a no that's not the point actually I think I kind of agree with Marcus Yes red pill Brothers wanna chug these cream sodas like tea really good Bros ah no thanks now maybe I could get some eggnog from up front when you chug that feels like you're drowning hey keep your saggy boobs to yourself what about best wishes from your Cloud9 family I'm our banging each other is for Glenn to be rehired as store manager I would sooner slit my throat and Jeff's throat before I'd let that happen Dina well we can likely rule out Foul Play according to his license he was 87. probably died old age my great-grandma died the same way her mom too bad jeans I guess so she just kept the dead man's wallet and we're all okay with that Finders Keepers I love how they put them in a uniform like he's a dead employee it's so cool this is not a Halloween play that is that is I don't know why you don't have a gurney yeah I was gonna get one but they're like a hundred bucks ah budget cuts thank you Governor greytons so we're supposed to put this thing well where you normally put it I guess I could put it on my lawn I guess Chuck what are you doing did you get the hummus Thomas thank you okay okay I'm gonna stop freaking out yeah well I mean once you finally decide to tell the truth [Music] so if women can show their boobs in the store can I walk around with my penis hanging out you can't feed a baby with your penis but if I did then it'd be okay you're fighting for the right to walk around the store with your penis hanging out no I'm just trying to figure out where the line is here [Music] I think what Garrett's trying to say is that if we ate human women then we could drink their milk oh wow damn it ah just trying to cut off my thumb just go just go just go when you say go just go when you say the word go go on the word go go I damn it damn it bad all right now Sandra it it says here that you want to kill a co-worker named Carol yeah I'm Sandra and I'm a dirty who goes around stealing other people's boyfriends oh yeah well who's this I'm Carol I'm a jealous psycho stalker who can't take the fact that Jerry chose Sandra over me and now they're moving in together and they're going to be so happy and I'll be alone which is sad okay full disclosure I've never pierced anyone's ears before but you've never had your ears pierced before so we're in this together so let's just close our eyes and go for it so you know how me and Carol hate each other well I hate her actually she looks up to me anyway I paid four different guys to come into the store and ask her out and then never show up nice benefits benefits good very good unionization I can't say the word this isn't taboo incest what it's Taboo in every culture we have a sickowitz that's me wait do you know Ricky Sikowitz he's my cousin what he's my cousin too oh we should probably stop doing stuff oh yeah I was gonna say that too is this your family oh yeah so clean your resume says you have a lot of experience babysitting actually it just says watching kids this one's eyes are dead but this one's eyes are alive what do you call her oh her name do not tell him her name okay is this worse Sandra Sandra finally come get me down oh my God thank you do you thinking oh no are you serious about the questioning just had to make sure you were real coroners and not just here for hummus or something sure yeah well here we are and you didn't touch the body absolutely not hey buddy some ramps [Music]

Channel: Superstore

Views: 50,852

Keywords: superstore, superstore bloopers, superstore funny moments, superstore ending, america ferrera, ben feldman, cloud 9, comedy, mark mckinney, kaliko kauahi, dina superstore, superstore show, superstore compilation, best of superstore, superstore crack, superstore amy jonah, superstore ending song, superstore dark moments, superstore sal, superstore sals dead, superstore moments that make me laugh audibly, superstore moments that ate and left no crumbs

Id: GAuo4y7nHh0

Length: 10min 33sec (633 seconds)

Published: Sun Jul 02 2023