Straight Talk on Relationships and Marriage | Pastor Kingsley Okonkwo

amen amen um man have you done the atlantis issued praise god so we're not wasting time we're investing in marriages it matters a lot people don't um understand how valuable what we do is until the challenge hits them i told you during the week that somebody that i cancelled some time ago was telling me that they asked him to bring two point something million for divorce and that's not the whole cost that's just to start the process you know so so it's cheaper to work on your marriage it's cheaper praise god men understand that one beyond the financial um demands the um heartache the stress then the children hallelujah you need to see guys you need to understand how important marriage is the touch of my message today is that it won't come naturally so if you if you're just gonna put a like title you can write it down it won't come natural or it won't come natural anyway the baseline is that this whole thing we're talking about it doesn't come naturally the reason why marriages are feeling is that people think that they can do marriage naturally i know what you feel that's why the divorce rates are this high it won't come natural you need something beyond your natural way of operating see marriage threatens satan amen god believes so much in marriage we said this yesterday that's why the first institution he started himself was marriage every decision with men that started it government was started by men schools were started by men the first one that god himself started was marriage you don't understand that's the most authentic institution and we said yesterday that all the evil church was a backup plan all the work we do as pastors is the work that our parents did not do somebody getting what i'm saying because you see from malachi he said god said he wants a godly seed from the marriage well i'm not supposed to be the one first teaching you the bible if your parents were doing the job they would teach you the bible is somebody getting what i'm saying sir a good marriage if a marriage has a whole threatens the devil threatens him that's why if you notice when god created adam there was no satan the moment he created marriage the very next chapter what happened satan appeared you see man alone or woman alone doesn't represent the image of god it is man and woman together that represents the image of god when it was only adam satan did not recognize adam he didn't look like god if you don't if you look at genesis 1 27 uncle when um god created adam and eve he said male and female made he them and then he called them adam adam they meant mankind is somebody getting what i'm saying so the idea of the image of god is man and woman together it's not only man it's not only woman only man a little man is not the image of god it's man and woman together so when it was only adam satan didn't recognize him as the image of god the moment eve appeared and then married and became one flesh the next line satan showed up because then he could now recognize that wow this is the image of god and who is satan's biggest enemy god so he was seeing the image of his enemy and he attacked the first marriage and he's still attacking marriages today so there's a great chance he will attack your marriage there's a great chance he's already attacking your marriage are you here somebody satan knows if he can break marriages he can break people we said yesterday that statistics shows that most people that are in prisons most people that drop out of school most people that are abused most of them come from single parent home or broken homes so satan knows the power he knows the power of breaking one home he knows the power of breaking my home sir is somebody getting what i'm saying i need you to catch a vision for that marriage if you are single catch a vision to marry well if you are married catch a vision to do marriage well because a lot depends on you generations after you will thank god for your right choice i tell the singles you you when you choose a husband you're not just choosing a husband for yourself you're choosing a father for your children when you choose a wife as a single man you're not using a wife for yourself but she's a mother for your children so you need to ask yourself beyond the attraction you have for this person is this the kind of man you want to raise your children is this the kind of man you want your children to want to be like is this kind of woman you want your daughters to want to be like don't just marry selfishly is somebody getting what i'm saying so satan attacked the first marriage he's still attacking marriages and you must make sure your own is not one of those that will be casualty to his attack is somebody getting what i'm saying he knows the power of agreement listen very carefully guys there is nothing on the earth today as powerful as a marriage nothing on the earth today as powerful as the mind satan knows this but christians don't know this nothing on the earth as powerful as the marriage during covet we all learnt that businesses can be shut down we learned that schools can be shut down we learned that airlines can be shut down we will learn that churches can be shut down are you getting what i'm saying there are countries where there are no churches is somebody getting what i'm saying we saw life churches shut down all over the world guess the only institution that didn't shut down marriage satan knows this satan knows this so you two need to understand it the strongest institution on the earth today is marriage that's the strongest yet many of us don't take it seriously it's the strongest and that agreement you have in marriage is the strongest agreement that exists is the strongest agreement that exists he said if two of you shall agree as touching what anything hey have you thought about that before that's such a blank check if two of you on earth shall agree as touching what anything our marriage is the highest level of agreement because that's the only place you can join with somebody spiritual and body most of the places you can join spiritually for instance in church we are all joined spiritually we are not necessarily joined mentally you somebody what i'm saying that's why all churches are different because we were thinking is different in some churches the way some of you are dressed is two kana i don't even know what i'm saying sometimes they don't wear earrings they don't make hair so mentally we are not in agreement spiritually we are one one god one christ one spirit that's where i end mentally we don't agree we're hearing you're going to hell woman you wear trousers you are jessica daughter i get what i'm saying sir even as a pastor you not have beard you are not a pastor of jesus christ because jesus christ has the possibility will be fool shaven i get what i'm saying mentally we're not together marriage is the only place where you join with somebody fully and also join with them physically it's the highest level of agreement there is on the earth and satan finds that agreement and i tell couples fight to win the agreement not the argument fight to win what the agreement not what many couples are fighting to win the argument and they are losing their agreement what you are losing is more than what you are gaining when you win argument and lose agreement are you here somebody i told yesterday there are seven things i can tell any married man that is either struggling or wants to multiply his rate of success there are seven things you can do that will change your life and two of it has to do with marriage two or more first one treat your wife well i said yesterday number two always discuss things with your wife always share your ideas with her get her to be on board you are tapping into the power of the agreement when both of you are on board the same thing two shall agree as touching anything hallelujah i share the story all the time i enjoy i've enjoyed this power of agreement there's nothing i might ever agree about that has not come to pass nothing absolutely nothing as long as we both agreed this is why this is why satan likes to fight the agreement in your home it slows down the process slows down the success you can agree about if you have a real-world child you guys can agree he said if two of which will agree that's touching what anything oh blank check what i mean who doesn't like a blank check blank check you can agree as touching anything there's nothing about that has not happened once we agree all i need to do is to get her to agree once we can agree it will come to pass where we live today we agreed we couldn't afford it we just agreed and we had incredible amount of details we wanted in the house i'm just giving you examples how about this agreement works and why you must fight for it as a couple this wife as you're a single person this is why you must marry somebody is compatible with you so if you're the person you're marrying there's already too much disagreement from the beginning you don't agree about anything you believe in tithing it doesn't believe in tithes if you believe in church you just believe in church you believe in pastor doesn't mean impossible if you're already disagree of everything you believe in not something authority he said nobody can talk to me even the person you want to come do you know what he's doing you have all kinds of nonsense arguments he said if you know what i went to one church in 1982 you see what they did to me i swear i don't go to church again but this same you you go to a restaurant they teach you about you go you keep going where you walk they've started to achieve no design is only church your friend do you leave oh shut the way your shirt talk to me i'm not going to touch the game forever i think that one church the pastor he told the tithe that's why i'm not going against the church for them to be fake that means there's origin oh i don't know if you cannot say so you you you you fight for that agreement so i said that's where we're living we agreed we said okay i want to move to we're living i want to move to ireland we agreed want to live in united states we agreed that we said i want to live in a place i play long tennis i said i'm going to live in a place where i can continue playing on tennis because i have to play in the mainland now mutual and so i don't want to live where i can play where i agreed i said we didn't have lights we should generate them in the middle i don't want this generator life i'm tired of it we agreed we agreed how many gates and exit the estimates we have you know it looks small but we agreed specifically what we wanted many couples this is what you should be doing with your time are greener by anything miraculously we got the house when we got the house guess what the week we were moving in they started building two tennis courts yesterday the week you told us coincidence to me it's not because this accident has existed yes before we came but the week we were moving in they started building tennis court too inside yesterday secondly the week also we're moving in coincidentally again it looks consistent but there's no questions we've got the estate started 24 hours power so i've lived in the ice for about six years now i don't have a generator for six years in nigeria i've never seen generator i don't have inverter for six years inside nigeria you are the one fighting your wife just agree don't be angry agree what you want god can create a new world for you he's one that made the promise not me he said with two of you did you bring the scripture up now tell you dj do i fluent you're not putting scripture yeah i would be flowing so you'll be putting my scripture that's how you do it to my church sorry so somebody knows what i'm saying that's what god says if two of you shall agree as touching anything all the details exactly i don't waste your time what a time like this one time so many years ago i took my wife down honey let's believe god for a million dollars because i just felt one of these days when i'm getting older i'm also going to design and live abroad tired of this nigerian stress i'm just going to leave abroad and be operating from there that i want to be able to go there and buy a house cash when i need it this was many years ago not today about ten years or more again seven years i don't know my wife or not i said one last week of a million dollars now it wasn't that i even looked rich no i didn't have anything that time i didn't look like this at all that time and i didn't used to do any business not that business is bad but i was not doing business i was just strictly doing ministry preaching because my schedule is really heavy so i just do ministry i thought i just believe god for a million dollars he said i'm going to be changing our narrative there was even no money i said i don't know we had that agreement on monday we agreed together notice he didn't say agreement prayer is nigerians had a prayer to it because nigerians need to reinforce everything what they say is agreement two of which agree concerning anything that they should ask i said let me give a million dollars we did that on a monday we're in the car dude on a monday on the thursday or wednesday of that same week same week again to use coincidence thank you to me it's not thursday of the same week somebody one veteran remembers came to a house and in the morning i've never had a bus knock out a dog and gave me a bag a perfume bag i said you want to come and say no they just want to drop back and they saw my face because it looked like it was perfume back actually and they saw my face that i looked somehow because i felt you woke up woke me up in the morning to give him perfume i have perfume in my room that i'm not even using so they now told me pastor is not perfume that is there i said good because i was already hungry i need to pass i don't know how to manage my expression better because you know what this pasta work you must learn to smile you don't mean it but i wasn't good at it that time so they saw my expression says this is not perfume that is there second good maybe left i opened the bag it was a hundred thousand dollars in cash same week me and my wife agreed we wanted a million dollars hundred thousand dollars in cash is good money in any country it was beautiful we took a picture with it it was fine i've never seen hundred times in one place together that time are you here somebody i can go on and on to the sexes of our children to how our children will be born everything was agreed upon see satan is fighting your agreement your agreement threatens him threatens his kingdom if he can't break you he will be threatened because of the godly seed you respect the things you do together for the kingdom are you here somebody but the issue is that getting marriage right doesn't come naturally that's what i'm here to say today in the short time i have doing marriage right doesn't come what naturally if you're a single person need to learn the qualities most young people don't know the qualities to look out for in his spouse it's so painful the accent what do you want in his past say i want all that there are some talent robbers they are talking now past that can be the qualities you pick many people don't even know their questions you look out for you think anybody will meet you just marry them no no no no no basic things if you're a christian the person who must be in christ when somebody's in crisis not that he goes to church he's that his nature is changed he doesn't go to church trust he's him he's church if somebody gets what i'm saying his nature has changed so he's not he's somebody he's not that he doesn't make mistakes but you see the difference between somebody that is born against somebody that is not is that somebody that is born again is moving the direction of pleasing god that's his direction he can fall on the wall but he will stand up and what keep moving he's moving the direction of pleasing god he's not the person you're trying to convince that malice is not good you're not going to have a person trying to convey you're showing in scripture about forgiveness no this person already has a relationship with god he knows what the king i've never known my wife we both were good christians and we understood what the christianity was about yesterday i talked a bit about divorce there is no way in scripture god permits divorce nowhere the only we said that during the week yesterday for those that were not here this is why you're making me repeat what i've already said the only thing god allows for you to divorce is based on the law of life because the love of life comes above the law of scripture because you must change their life to practice scripture okay so we said that yesterday the only reason why god permits you to divorce he says if the unbelieving depart meaning that unbelieving guy or whoever that guy is is applying his free will to go he said the person goes because the law of life comes in love free will if the person goes he's free then you are free that's the only reason in scripture both older new testament that god gave for divorce or god permits for divorce ever that thing god said you signed for this say my husband is shouting at me when you were saying for better for what were you thinking the worst was talking about what was the measurement of that was my husband he doesn't bring feeding money at all good what give us idea of worse my wife is too he's too talkative my wife is too dizzy that's what you sign for better for us if you were enjoying now you won't have come to meet us i get what i'm saying if you also had bought your car will you come and give one tire to the bastard you will write your car alone but when the words come you want to become a sister in church is what you sign that's what the covenant is is what you sign so this is why you don't enter with anybody if you're single shine your eyes well the person was being christ the person must have good character i have a book tattoo who should i marry right that's what's in this i won't go into it number one aussies tenses number one is that christmas because i'm super personal character look beyond what they are saying check how they are living somebody say love you but is he acting like he loves you because we get confused pastor this guy beats me he shot at me this man cheated on me destroying me but he said he love me what should i do don't follow what he's saying follow what he is doing character just because you meet somebody in church doesn't mean they have character a church is a hospital a church is a hospital so it's not everybody you meet in church that is godlio in church every good church attracts all kinds of people if you don't know whether a church is good the most if i want to be with the church there must be prostitutes in the church jesus ministry attracted prostitutes am i correct or not attracted to drug dealers and tax collectors and criminals every good ministry attracts that so and some of them are responding to treatment some are not responding to jesus this is why in our own church one of the standards that we ask you to talk to the chief medical officer that has their fire pastor has everybody's fire some people he has never spoken to because they are fired that's not part of how our work operates so when you come and say ah mr jones to marry me personally open his fire he joined in 1982 he has not paid tight one day he's a thief he has not joined department this one won't serve he's fighting everybody joining tati department in 30 months he's a correspondent person he will open this file i see where is responding to treatment or not responding to it hallelujah it doesn't work so there are tenses i can't waste time on them so one christ number two character number three counsel every good church has a counselling process go through counsel in the multitude of counselors there is what safety one of my guys i saw him he was the relationship one girl i didn't have a problem with him put a number chat members and one day i was doing something on his phone and i stumbled on a text by mistake sincerely on a text the girl sent but i saw what she wrote i said this girl is not saved she doesn't understand this thing i told him you can't marry her ah he said no they must marry and see the girl was was going to travel to america you see that's nothing men marry for how it will help their life which women are married for love men need you before they love you women love you before they need you we said that yesterday again you didn't come you're making me repeat what i said yesterday men need you because the first marriage i ever happened genesis after two it was based on need it's not good for man to be alone so it's not meant for love based on how they need you it's when they need you to not love you women around they first love you before they need you so most men when they meet a woman she's just loving loving you think decide to end when she love you she will start needing you my credit is finished you sir this is not how we started he said my phone is bad you said i'm not working nighting why she love you she will start needing you she said you didn't call me you didn't text me i said my body is paying me you didn't ask me the man didn't budget for all these things oh a woman first loves you before she needs you all right so so counselor so i told the guy you can't marry this girl she's not safe though hey he said no because the guy was going to go to america and he has dream to go see men i know you like money and prosperity be careful that can't be the only reason if that comes along with it i understand but see you are setting a trap for yourself when you marry yourself because when you get that money you find that you don't like that person and i'm a pastor i've seen this over and over again men that start like that they divorce many many times because they marry first for money they get money they devote down after money has come then they money for paper then they get prepared they reverse that one papers come then it's when they assist they're not looking for the person they really really don't try it i've seen too many of those casualties as a woman to be careful that's why someone have a book that tells you seven questions wise you may ask any man does i love you you need to know what he say ask him why what reasons why why do you love me if he's stammering then wrong so there's a book here too i said so please buy these books because i can't teach everything inside it i remember i doing book signing today after church so i told him to come by this girl and he went ahead and murdered her in fact he went this this is my right-hand man pastor this guy was my right-hand man very my right-hand right-hand man who started ministry he was the ministry before the minister and even the one it was before the one he was at mum my right arm he got married without me being present in fact not that not i wasn't present i wasn't even aware not that i wasn't present that's not even i wasn't aware he got married it was months after he got married that i saw picture so even his parents were asking him that they really went in the white house okay no here he said i traveled he made excuse me one year after the girl sent him text she said i can't continue this relationship she called marriage relationship i said that's what i saw i saw that she didn't know what she was getting into that's what i saw and later we found out the reason why she was ending it was that she was now pregnant for somebody else i said i saw it can't say we save you in the morning of cancer there is water saved there are 10 seas every single person you must get this book who should i marry i dealt with 10 seas you can't miss it if you get that thing right and there's not my hair tied to 25 wrong reasons from enter relationship it will help you screen yourself the bible says examine yourself so you will check this 25 wrong reasons to make sure this is not the reason you're because you you'll be amazed how your your mind place tricks on you you think you love somebody but you're marrying them for a wrong reason and what i said in that book is have you married for the wrong reason you are most likely might the wrong person if you mind for the wrong reason you're married what the wrong person very important there are two more books i'll talk about that all the books are good these ones are gift packs they're called all year round what i did in that book is to coach married people all year 52 points for 52 weeks short advice what you can be doing for your husband and wife for 52 weeks so all year round you'll be a great lover even the great players still need coaches i get what i'm saying so that's what you get they will send you emails to remind you of 52 points every week you have something you can do for your wife my wife have to write for the woman you have something you do for your husband it's a good gift pack comes with a paper and other things lastly on books i'll talk about my best-selling book my wife wrote this book it's our best-selling book it's titled a to z of marriage but that what we discovered was that like i said it will come to you natural when you tell a man love a woman and you tell a woman love a man he's very vague what does he what does that mean love your wife you say i love her they have not been able to turn it into applicable steps that's where the problem is most marriages are crushed i've never seen anybody marriage with a bad intention everybody enters with good intention nobody else has married you that was your dream automatically is going to end in two years nobody's a liar everybody enters with what great intention is the lack of the knowledge lack of application so what my wife did in this book is that i coach the women to tell them what love means to a man in alphabetical order a to z my wife coached the men telling what love means to a woman alphabetical order a to z so for instance a i told women that my wife told women no no my wife told women yes that a for men is acceptance so my women that men like acceptance that's number one need one of the number one needs of men acceptance men like acceptance if you are going to marry a man you must first accept him why is this important for women because women are nurturers and fixers every time a woman is getting into relation with a man she's making a mental note of all the things you want to change about him man i'm giving you the secret of women they are planning or they will change your body say this one the way he's dressing i'll change it this is trousers that are always too big he will change it this is titties not all level will level it i'm telling you women make everything better no matter how they state something is a woman seeing it in a way it can be better so it's an instinct she doesn't even know why but it's like instinct she comes and makes everybody better so when she's seeing you she's just looking at you he needs help he's happy that we help his life because the way he's dressing you know good the way he's spending his money the way he's working do it so women have that tendency and because women sometimes lack patience they want to enforce that change quickly men like acceptance you want to change your mind you're changing by first accepting him you don't confront him men are warriors so you don't confront him face to face no stay by his side he prefers side by side communication those that were here yesterday you understand i mean yes yeah you understand that you didn't commit to the game who we explained all this in details and give statistics so man like side by side so if you want to change your mind you send him changing from the side not from the front if you confront him from front he's a warrior for a carpenter every problem is hammer and nail because that's all the truly has if you confront a warrior his only reaction is default mode is the word fight whether you are right or wrong you come to his front he's a warrior men fight for everything they have in life i get what i'm saying men flow he's a natural fighter he's not like you as a woman as a woman it's not as if you don't fight for things but you see your own life is a bit different women if you are if you are good looking you can survive in this life if you have to do pretty face and bitty voice you will survive in this life for a man if you do pity face they will slap you men fight for everything they have man am i correct because nobody send you man fight that's why marketers know this that's why makatas use women for marketing you don't use men if you use these men just you're in your office two strange men are knocking at your door say what do you do what you're saying we're not buying we're not buying anything please leave this place immediately two strange men in your dog you locked up more say please out of here boy imagine two very beautiful ladies you're not going here just what are they muslim two of you in the sun why are you in the sun please please please come in come here what are they saying okay we don't need it let's buy two just to encourage you young women to encourage you i get what i'm saying so men are fighters you don't confront them pastor two of my all my staff are coming from the office to my house while meeting so there were three guys one girl they were coming to my house to meet their car broke down the road so the guys wanted to be gentlemen so the woman was sitting in the car so children came out trying to stop cars nobody will stop for them saying three men the stop car for road yeah i'm rubber soul these are because this is the new thing they're doing now nobody stopped for them they borrowed themselves the three men went inside the car the girl came out and stood on the road three cars stopped immediately are you here somebody so men are fighters if you want to change him you don't confront him you stand by his side you stand by his side tell him hey honey maybe your husband eats a makes loud noise you want to change it look at my time you use this man you are disgracing yourself you can turn the honey i like the way you enjoy food you can enjoy your food you are enjoying your food this is what i like cooking for you he was saying thank you then you think that when we go for pasta because we need an event you know we'll go for dinner say don't eat like that though people would think a bushman he would hear better like us [Laughter] acceptance men like that's why men like to go to bars men like to go to where people drink in a bar there's total acceptance even if you kill your mother after they just kill somebody else and say i'm a bad guy give me one shot that's what meant it's a no judgment zone hallelujah men like acceptance the a for women we taught the women that i mean taught the men rather that a for women is attention women like attention everything women do is for attention women need it they need attention this is why their hair is long this is why they paint all these colors this is why they wear their their clothes are designed for color designed for attraction designed for shape they are looking for attention satan who knows this that's why you notice that girls and club and all that they're naked it's attention they're all looking for it's a legitimate need just assistant will pervert it so as a husband as a boyfriend give your wife attention for some time for no reason just go and sit with her for no reason go and check up on her for no reason call her for no reason be looking at her see what's wrong say nothing pastors i should give you attention i'm just looking at you i did to my wife all the time i'm just going to be looking at her she was wrong said nothing i'm giving you attention they say you need attention so i'm here you have my full attention just go and hang out with her in the parlor go hang out in the kitchen go and have a bath with her hallelujah somebody's saying when i come we'll go into all these things details on the average i have about my wife at least if it's very busy with twice a week we could have a better life it's busy if it's not busy we can have a bath every day every week we're always together i've always given i was giving our attention thank you for the people clapping on that side your marriage will be sweet are you here somebody give our attention if then i'll do our fight against what i'm going to share today our letter r we taught the women that men are for men is respect men like respect women don't understand it they say what do you mean by that is that women don't like respect yes women also like respect even dog need respect everybody needs respect but that's not what we're talking about when we're talking about respect for men is their love languages they are key to unlocking their heart you see the example pastor mildred gave god was so interesting god told women to do the thing that he will find hardest to do which is respect men and that's the thing that men need the most god also told men what women what do you find hardest to do which is love and that's what women need the most men like respect respect unlocks a man's heart if somebody gets what i'm saying abigail in the bible understood this david was coming to kill a bigger family abigail intercepted him on the way i began knelt down to talk to him abigail called him lord like 10 times in one conversation he turned david back turned him back by respect and david never forgot her the moment a husband died they went to marry her dave was only married but his wife used to give him problem his wife had disrespect for him his wife is the one that was correcting one day he was dancing the wife said you're disgracing yourself so when he met a woman that really respected him he never forgot her collected her instagram handle collected a tick tock i was checking her status the moment she updated obituary he slid into her dm he married her immediately this means he was keeping tabs made her immediately i call her the unforgettable one i have a message i got to my youtube channel the unforgettable man and the unforgettable man there's a way you can be as a woman no man who forgets it this week because no man will forget you i'm telling you that woman was the unforgettable one david under my respect men like respect you can't tell a man or get a man to do anything if you tell him respectfully unfortunately for women because women are impatient women are they feel deeply so they just say the way their mind is and you know the way women communicate to women it's not the way women communicate to men men have ego it's very they're very touched a man would do what's wrong just to make sure you don't control him many men tell me that i'd rather do what's wrong than to allow this woman tell me what to do i'm i'm i didn't make this up this is real life i'm a counselor i'm you i don't know if you heard my profile i'm a certified counselor but local internationally i council people from everywhere in the world everywhere in the world and 99 percent of the time and i kid you not i can't make this up 99 percent of the time in cancelling sessions when i almost sit down together in my room or in my own online the only reason the only complaint the man has is my wife doesn't respect me 99 percent of the time that's all these men equate all their problem their marriage to respect that's why as a woman instead of you to be debating and joining feminism i'll be fighting nonsense god gave you the key he said if you want this man to be obeying you respect him this is why the places that affairs flow easily is where respect flows easily boss and pa there's natural respect boss and secretary boss and housemate many house made wish collect our wife because the wife is talking to the husband like john john you see when you're coming back home are you okay john but the house will say oh god welcome even if it comes one am the secretary will say thank you welcome sir you oh you said you need to adjust your tire sir but my dad would say see you you don't even know how to knock tight have you been walking since see how you tire your tire grown man so his affection is moving to secretary his affection moving to pa that's where first flow easiest because those women have the control respect and most wives don't think it's important because he's are we not married are we not made is he is he because you are seeing his weaknesses he's respected everywhere else in the world but you are seeing him in his weakest that's why most women admire their own bosses most women admire their md most women admire their pastor most of them admire the men in front of them because they don't live with them if you to marry your md you choose to be attracted to your husband if you marry your pastor you will see him finish too the reason why i respect him now god is far nothing is wrong with your husband just respect him that one you think about him see my husband he doesn't have work even if his income is too low but see my md see the way just walks see his suit is somebody taking care of him take care of your until he'll grow um man you send me i'll go back here number man you send me something to appreciate me are you getting what i'm saying sir respect the man and his unconditional respect he won't always behave respectfully but that's what that's the main thing you may think if you behave respectfully i will respect you that's not what scripture says it's unconditional respect the same way he chooses demanded to give you unconditional love the instructions of god that category two come natural it's not what you feel like it's no one is believing respectfully it's what you should give whether he behaves it or not do you know the way whenever you come to god to complain about your spouse do you know who god talks to you that's how god treats every case if you're going to say my husband is wicked god talks to you your husband is not here now he's man you are talking he can't talk to somebody that is not present he's you who talked so in first peta three the one woman said my husband is not behaving where god said with your good behavior your husband has not obeying the word you continue to obey the word by your good behavior i thought god i would knock him no because i just continue in fact respect him more now be like daughter of sarah need them for him said respect him more that's the only way to get him to change when you come to god is you he talks to my wife god will talk to you he can't your wife is not president somebody what i'm saying respect the hour for the hour for women we told men that women need romance women need what romance most men are too rigid say who has time for romance this country is too tough now you see the economy no time for all these things now we are walking listen ugh we know life is tough we know life is hard your job is not to make it harder those of you that were here yesterday i explained to you how a woman's mind works happy why god said you need to cheer her up for one full year if you didn't come yesterday again so women are grown in an atmosphere of fantasy women have fantasy your job as a man is not to bring that back to reality because the men think that's their work it's all these things you are watching it's not look we must be real [Laughter] that is not your work orga your work is you're not the chief reality of visa your job is to fulfill her fantasy that's your job this is why you are hired this is why she chose you because women grow up you have the gift of fantasy all their movies are fantasy based cinderella rapunzel you lost your shoes somebody you should come and find you lost your shoes on ebay you go see them then go sell them and go sell them women grow with fantasy so as a man even though you you have the gift of logic and reality your job is not to bring her to reality your job is to help her fulfill her fantasy women will become super women if they're happy see your wife is like a squad missile your wife is a sophisticated piece of equipment and the key to unlocking her powers is happiness that's what i say go and share her for one year if you make her wife happy she will be she has many asmrs many weapons she has not brought out and you think that unlocks those things happiness if she's happy you bring out the weapon of prayer push you sit and start moving she has many that's why i familiar with my head is a book titled um prayer journal prayer my wife this is prayer she prayed over me that's making my life move like this somebody get what i'm saying see if everyone must get this book on prayer so you make her happy fulfill her fantasy i get what i'm saying women like romance i mean if you're a young man here don't go very important see romance is not expensive roman simply means doing the ordinary things in a special way that's all it is doing the ordinary things in what a special way it's not expensive you don't need so much money to do so admit i don't have money i would like you romance no romance is doing the same he might just be holding her hand how much is that one it's free you are going somewhere with her just hold her hand somebody said i don't like to hold on to swing my hand i'm just my are you a soldier when they are rooting for me where are you it's now you want to form swinging hands say no i don't like holding hands i'm just i told you to come to you natural the reason many marriages are failing they are trying to be who they are say i don't like holding hands when you say you will do start to do hold the hand it can be small things you doing the simple things that in a special way you want to buy her perfume she's complaining that she needs any perfume or perfume see by the way men women talking directly so that's nothing tip you need to learn women talk what women never talk in the world of women the the planet they came from is wrong if you need perfume to say i need perfume that's not how women talk women say all my perfumes are finishing she has talked to you she has talked to you but many men just think okay that's just a statement no it's information this my phone is old and it's not if i don't know it's working well she has spoken to you she has spoken to you i get what i'm saying so he's doing these simple things in a special way so she needs perfume don't just take her to a boutique or someone say hey sleep different perfect pick anyone you like i'll pay don't be that dry women give you points when you notice things she didn't officially tell you when you can read her indirect message she's caused you points for it hallelujah when you can notice what she likes without her telling you she knows you're paying attention so you should know the kind of perfumes this is not expensive just a little effort not the kind of perfumes she likes the fragrances she likes or even just a new release of perfume women like anything that is new so you may never know what she's like but there's a new release of perfume just buy buy it don't just bring it to her i say honey i saw this i don't buy for you or you start to spray don't be that dry don't be that dry buy the perfume wrap it nothing camouflage color wrap it in something feminine nice and hide it somewhere i get what i'm saying you see it's the same perfume you wanted to buy the other man we buy and just carry but you are putting some effort you wrap it you see in the world of men many people like you to wrap your gift because you are wasting my time i will first unwrap it you see men like the project but women like the process you see see the worst causing problem in marriage is that men are trying to love women like men and women are trying to love men like women i don't even know what i'm saying that's what's causing what i'm dealing with today you must love a woman like a woman don't love her what happens that men are giving women what men like and women are giving men what women like they said you know whenever a man marries you or before he has slept with you he doesn't mind touching you he touches you a lot he likes to hug you hold your hand hold because then he's he call for men love is largely physical so he's trying to express the moment he stops sleeping with you maybe you're married or you're fornicating what you should not be doing you will notice that he's touching you will do strictly to sexual touching because he's already taught you now so he's not looking for touching your hand or your shoulder he will only touch you in your private pass he will just hold you like this he's project driven i'm telling you and it totally irritates women now i'm speaking tons of marriage i believe so much married so you know your husband just only third time touches you you know straight to the point and irritates women on the other hand when women want to touch their husband he's touching his head and i want to irritate men because you're scratching my head yeah i'm thinking of something you're disturbing me there's only one placement like to be touched another one don't touch me i'm busy you know what's happening men are touching women where men like to be touched women are touching men where women like to be touched so i introduce you to exchange as a man learn to touch your wife's hair touch your shoulder rub her back hug her for no reason cuddle if you don't want to sleep better in the night do all this cuddling in the day then you as a woman don't bother to touch your husband's head or whatever touch him the only place he likes to be touched he will hardly complain i said that to say that men are loving women like men women are loving men like women love the way the person receives the love so romance so wrap it hide it somewhere if she's the kind of person that is cooking a lot hiding in the kitchen she has a car hiding in a car hiding in a wardrobe hide it somewhere and one day she would do something just find something wrapped and there will be a note on it that will say i know you will find it the way i found you [Laughter] [Applause] it's ordinary perfume but the work you put in into delivering the perfume if somebody tell you what i'm saying that's all love is that's what romance is that little effort it makes no meaning to men men i don't even need to hide give me the perfume direct don't even wrap it because we wrap it now i have to first unwrap it which is work men like the project women like the process so you have to what i'm saying is that you have to go out of your own natural instincts your marriage can work if you want to love a woman the way you think you must go out of yourself to love her the way she wants to be loved it doesn't romance doesn't cost money it's just thoughtfulness the first time my wife i changed my wife's phone then whenever married were just dating she was in unilad doing her master's we're in a relationship her phone was bad again she didn't ask me for phone she just kept saying oh her phone is bad her phone is not going her phone is having problem she has already spoken and me being a relationship coach i was already well schooled but i couldn't afford a brand new phone because i didn't have money then i couldn't afford a brand new phone i couldn't afford a fairly useful i could only afford an unfairly useful you know those phones that you buy phone separate buy chargers separate buy batteries say please unfairly use that all the number and everyone showing well that's what i could buy but you see i didn't go and meet her and buy it and say hey money just right you know that money no day you know things lost level now just manage this perfume no i didn't say a phone don't do that if a young man here is struggling or starting life don't go and tell a woman that she already knows you don't have money don't say no you know i don't have money don't say that don't reinforce the facts because men don't know how to communicate because men we are logical and we are literal so i don't money oh god said no no if a woman already knows you don't have money she can see now you know you don't have money don't come at the enforcer instead she wants something she can believe so talk about the future talk about what you can do not what you are doing is somebody getting it don't go and present yourself and say manage me no say hey i'm buying you this unfairly used phone but trust me the next phone i will buy for you that a time is coming i will take you to any store you like and you will pick any phone you like you are giving a fairly useful note but you are talking about the future people can challenge your presence but nobody can challenge your future are you here somebody nobody can challenge what your future hallelujah so it's it's very important that you that you present yourself i bought that phone but you see i couldn't present that on fairly useful like that instead she went to watch the show museum center comedy show she went to use the bathroom i brought out her sim card from her old phone put it put in this new phone put us in the new phone i bought for her or fairly useful but put it she got to the hostel in the evening something was ringing from her back say what's that this is that's your back but she does not my ringtone this was your back so she opened the bag and she picked the call and found out that i changed her phone she was more happy about how i changed the phone than to notice that i wasn't unfairly useful it's saying that's all romance is doing the ordinary things but doing it in a special way and for men it doesn't come natural i can go on and on it doesn't come what natural but the key the key is to go out of yourself there are many things that cause differences between a man and a woman many things that cause differences this book is a good book to get we're going to do signing after each set of marriage but that makes a good difference part of which is your background what if you came from two different backgrounds that would cause differences what's the number one reason why people divorce is called irreconcilable differences and that is fighting the agreement that i spoke earlier about irreconcilable differences they said adultery is not reasonable divorce um violence is not reasonable divorce this is number one reason is that you reconcile that unwillingness to address the difference and the difference is not a bad thing it's a good thing the difference is necessary for us to work well together in synergy the difference is important if two if two hot tempered people marry they come they can survive if two strong willed people married they can't survive so usually opposites attract somebody that is strong with my somebody chilled somebody that is outgoing who mind somebody quiet somebody that is scattered has reminded somebody organized but at the beginning that thing will attract you if you're scattered you'll be attracted by how organized she is this guy's organized everything's just in one place everything's like ah i like her she too in her mind even though jesus christ i like him i like the way he can talk anyhow me i can't talk because quiet people they talk who just talking their mind so when they see somebody that can talk in their mouth hey she doesn't like him he can't just talk he's bold he knows everybody you will start by liking it after a while to stop frustrating you must you talk to everybody must you always sit quiet hallelujah so you must go out of your natural self to stop being a good lover and the key to that because i'm closing now the key to that is allowing the holy spirit walk in your life you must yield to the holy spirit without holy spirit you won't survive it's going to be tough because as a natural person you want to do what you like but the holy spirit will help you go out of your way if somebody get what i'm saying yield into the holy spirit i'm going to take one minute to pray because i'm already done i'm going to take one minute to pray because if i don't leave anything here with you i want to leave that with you yield into the holy spirit you can't do marriage right without him he's our counselor is our helper he wants to do life with you you can't do money there are times you'll tell you don't shout back at your husband small things have broken marriages if you see what breaks my gentiles not it's not the big things it's the small things god just tell you apologize you say but i don't i'm not the one wrong because i know but just apologies takes the holy spirit to melt your heart to do so yesterday my wife misplaced her airports this iphone she's she's careful with every other thing but she misplaces that thing every day i've bought like three or four that's the only thing in this life she misplaces she loses it every every time so this last one she has i went to london or so i got something to look the room wrote her name on it it was special then we got to asaba she was on looking for it on the bed she was very frustrated she couldn't find it in my mind i said this guy don't lose this thing again and i almost wanted to tell her you are too careless with this thing but the ligo said don't say it so i thought it in my mind but i didn't say it it wasn't because i was smart my flesh the natural thing to do was say must you always misplace this thing this is not the thought of she's always misleading them on the plane she always misplaces them so i was about to say you can't keep buying airports every year but so i just caught it in my mind i said the next day she found it on the bed somewhere the next day and she said this thing frustrated me so much yesterday that and if you had said and she said i know you were wanted to say that i always misplace my airport and she said if you had said it i would have cried she was at the brink of crying that i said and she said if i had said it she would have cried there's nobody would have known that information if not that the holy ghost told me don't say anything this is what makes marriage work guys it's not by your power there are times i get home from work my wife will serve me food and the little say give her your fish i'll say holy ghost you're not aware she's going to cook this food all the fish are under her command she can do with them and she will it's not this one they give me that i should give her and besides she didn't even say she want fish while i'm busy i'll give you the holy ghost my office say honey get me out of your fish now i'll say ah and i thought in the other women that you thought is zero you must do there are times i've been in the office they're gonna say call your wife now check up on her i said let me finish this chapter or let me finish this meeting everything then she will call me i'll say i wanted to one time we were in the car we had something we didn't agree about so when the car was sitting in front she was sitting at the back and i were pooping in the castle she was sending me send me a text a chat that this thing i did she wasn't happy with it i mean she said his holy ghost told me what to reply just say ah sorry baby oh sorry baby the guys told me exact words to write for me being a man and a teacher and a relationship coach i say if i explain to her well and tell her well she will understand why i did what i did many of us are fighting to win argument instead of win agreement the moment i sent what i sent it made things worse she replied heavily too intense later some days or weeks after we were talking and she said that time i sent you that message the first time all i expected you to say was oh sorry baby she used the exact words i just faced my friend like i didn't know what she was talking about it was later i preached on the purpose she heard it for the first time i just born the holy ghost what's that going on he gave me the exact words so i want to pray for us today that's all i want to do today whether you're single am i doing to yield to the holy spirit can we stand why i just play something i'm about to close just permit me this extra five minutes i just feel i should minister this the holy spirit we mend homes today honey please come supreme please just take one minute to pray if you are single the same thing you need the holy spirit he will guide you he will tell you when you should not go hide some relationships he will save you from time wasters and if you're married please if you're not sitting with your spouse this is a good time to please go towards your spouse for one minute [Music] please pray everyone if you feel married the holy spirit help me to be a better husband you can't be a better husband your native wisdom no you can't be a better wife with your native wisdom you need the holy spirit you need the holy spirit zuka brother bakes in the name of jesus can i see those that are married in the house please if you're married in the house if am i in the house please if your husband or wife is in this hall go towards him or her if you are not sitting by them please every husband and wife hold your wife or hold your husband no i don't mean hold her hand i mean hold face to face hold fist of not side by side hold like this hold like this [Music] people are not saying camera i'll show you again please this is what i said to do totally hold your wife hold your husband talk to your wife talk to your husband for one minute just tell him anything tell her anything talk you need to talk i'm watching you this supervision yeah support not talking if you have a friend that your wife if she's angry with you just tell her you're sorry the only spirit is here is easy now just like you're sorry if you're not your husband tell me you're sorry hold yourself whisper to each other's ears i want you to hold yourself cuddle hold yourself right you can whisper to each other's ears i don't want anybody to hear what you're saying so hold well ahead hold like that so that you can whisper just talk to yourselves just if you have not offended behind recent time just tell her what you like about her tell him what you like about him i want you to do it now do it now if your spouse is in the hall do it now do it just tell him or her something hey nothing you did last year is sleeping in me nothing you did last week you sleeping in me but i want to forgive i want i'm trusting god to to let me i'm not joking or this important this service say but i'm hold well i want you to be whispering to each other's ear face to face hold him please first to first hold him face to face holding talk to each other if you have nothing to apologize about then just telling me how what you like about him or her if there's something your wife or husband i've been telling you to do for him or her this is a good point to say i would try to do it i'll try to be better i'll try it right i'm not joking this is where in the presence of the holy spirit so please don't grieve the holy spirit this is important support and instruction if you have not just said and pray for your partner then if you're going to say to him or speak a word of prayer over him or her speaking what any prayer you like but i want your mouth to be moving this is a prophetic exercise please so don't don't play with it don't play with it don't play with it pray for that man pray for that woman pray for her him or her [Music] lastly i want you to also kiss your spouse right now i'm acting under the anointing please do not disobey the holy spirit please kiss kiss kiss pastor you're not kissing sorry kiss your spouse kiss your spouse someone have not kissed since they got married [Music] thank you jesus in the name of jesus let me just pray for everyone before i step down sorry for taking your time but i'm just trying to do what the holy spirit laid in my heart quickly to get out of here but i pray for every single that is under the sound of my voice i pray that they will not miss the mark these ones will not marry wrong you will prepare them you will package them and you repair them in the name of jesus this person this young man this young woman will be a gift to his or her spouse they will marry for destiny not just for money they will marry to honor you not just to honor themselves and father i pray that their eyes will be open they will see their husband they will see their wives in the name of jesus i pray that you'll do a quick walk this year by the time we come again there will be many marriages testimony in the name of jesus there will be many testimonies of marriages in the name of jesus those that are in the wrong relationship god will open your eyes and for those that are married i decree whatever is standing between both of you i rebuke that spirit in the name of jesus you will get closer you will grow fonder of each other your love will get deeper in the mighty name of jesus what god has joined together nothing will put our son i decree that the holy ghost will melt your heart for each other in the mighty name of jesus and lastly i heard that tomorrow is your pastor's wedding anniversary hallelujah with his permission with the authority over this house i also like to just speak a word of prayer over the border of them please if you don't mind can you come on stage both of you please just come so i'll pray and step down you take over from there this is how you're clapping wow

Channel: LDM WITH PK

Views: 43,087

Keywords: Pastomildred, kingsley okonkwo, pastor k, ldmwithpk, love, dating, marriage

Id: 0J_y3ejN6Vs

Length: 62min 13sec (3733 seconds)

Published: Sat Jan 08 2022