Stephen Rents The 'Trump Pee Pee Tape' Hotel Room For A Night

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>> Stephen: HEY! WELCOME BACK. GIVE IT UP FOR JON BATISTE AND "STAY HUMAN" RIGHT THERE! GIVE IT UP! ( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ) OH, MY GOSH! JON, MY FRIEND, IT HAS BEEN AN AMAZING WEEK. >> Jon: YEAH. >> Stephen: WE'RE HAVING AN AMAZING WEEK, THE "RUSSIA WEEK" HERE. THIS MIGHT BE MY FAVORITE NIGHT TO HAVE THE ENTIRE RUSSIA WEEK BECAUSE THIS NIGHT IS WHY I WENT. THE PIECE WE'RE SHOWING TONIGHT IS THE REASON WE WENT. I WAS SAYING TO CHRIS, MY PRODUCER, AND HE SAID, YOU WANT TO BE GOING TO RUSSIA? I SAID NOBODY'S GOING TO BE TALKING ABOUT THAT, I'M A DUMMY. THE BIG PART OF THE INTERVIEW THEY DID WITH TRUMP FOCUSED ON THE DOSSIER. BACK IN JANUARY, TEN DAYS BEFORE TRUMP WAS INAUGURATED, A DOCUMENT WAS LEAKED CONTAINING ALLEGATIONS THAT TRUMP HAS DEEP FINANCIAL TIES TO RUSSIA, THAT HIS CAMPAIGN WAS BEING SUPPORTED BY THE RUSSIAN GOVERNMENT, AND THAT THE RUSSIANS HAD A COMPROMISING VIDEO OF DONALD TRUMP WATCHING PROSTITUTES URINATE ON A BED IN THE MOSCOW RITZ CARLTON PRESIDENTIAL SUITE. IT WAS A BOMBSHELL, AND WHEN FORMER F.B.I. DIRECTOR JAMES COMEY INFORMED THE PRESIDENT ABOUT IT, TRUMP WASN'T HAPPY. HE TOLD THE "TIMES," "WHEN HE BROUGHT IT TO ME, I SAID THIS IS REALLY MADE-UP JUNK. I JUST THOUGHT ABOUT, MAN, THIS IS SUCH A PHONY DEAL." AND REMEMBER, AS THE FOUNDER OF TRUMP UNIVERSITY, HE'S AN EXPERT ON PHONY DEALS. ( LAUGHTER ) ( APPLAUSE ) ( PIANO RIFF ) TRUMP CLAIMED HE CAN PROVE IT'S BOGUS BECAUSE "I HAVE WITNESSES. YOU KNOW, I WENT THERE WITH PHIL RUFFIN." NOW, I THOUGHT PHIL RUFFIN WAS THE ARCH NEMESIS OF MCGRUFF THE CRIME DOG. "I'LL GET YOU, RUFFIN!" ( LAUGHTER ) BUT IT TURNS OUT, HE'S A CASINO OWNER FRIEND OF TRUMP'S. LET'S TAKE A LOOK AT THIS UPSTANDING CHARACTER WITNESS THEY CALL PHIL RUFFIN-- OH, THEY TOTALLY DID IT. YEAH. YEAH, THEY DID IT. NOW, THE WILDEST ACCUSATIONS IN THAT DOSSIER HAVE NEVER BEEN CONFIRMED. BUT AS FAR AS I KNOW, NOBODY HAS TRIED. HERE'S THE REASON WHY. THE MEDIA SAID IT'S TOO SALACIOUS FOR US TO LOOK INTO. BUT IT'S THE ONLY PART WE CARE ABOUT OR TALK ABOUT, THE PEE PEE TAPE! PEE PEE TAPE! PEE PEE TAPE! PEE PEE TAPE! THERE WAS ONE MAN BRAVE ENOUGH TO GO TO MOSCOW AND CHECK IT OUT. HE HAS TWO THUMBS. ( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ) JIM? >> STEPHEN: MOSCOW. THE HEART OF MOTHER RUSSIA. THE SOURCE OF THE GREATEST POLITICAL TURMOIL TO AFFLICT THE HIGHEST ECHELONS OF THE UNITED STATES GOVERNMENT IN A GENERATION. I WENT TO THE RUSSIAN BEAR'S DEN MYSELF TO ASK THE QUESTION THAT OTHERS WERE AFRAID TO -- DO YOU HAVE THE PEE PEE TAPE? DO YOU HAVE THE PEE PEE TAPE? I'LL ALSO TAKE THE PEE-PEE TAPE, I WOULD LIKE THE THE PEE PEE TAPE? THE PEE PEE TAPE? THE PEE PEE TAPE? FOR SOME REASON, ASKING RANDOM PEOPLE FOR THE PEE PEE TAPE WASN'T WORKING. SO I MET WITH RUSSIAN SURVEILLANCE EXPERT ANDREI SOLDATOV. A JOURNALIST CRITICAL OF THE KREMLIN'S SURVEILLANCE TACTICS, ANDREI HAS BEEN INTERROGATED BY THE F.S.B. FOUR TIMES! I MET HIM AT AN UNDISCLOSED MOSCOW HOTEL. HELLO, ANDREI. >> HELLO, STEPHEN. >> STEPHEN: JUST IN CASE WE'R -- I KNOW YOU DON'T HAVE THE ANSWER TO THESE QUESTIONS BUT DO YOU THINK THE RUSSIANS HAVE CMOPROMOT ON DONALD TRUMP? >> I DON'T KNOW. HAVE YOU HEARD ABOUT THE PEEPEE TAPE? >> YES. >> Stephen: WHAT HAVE YOU HEARD? >> THERE WAS SOMETHING EMBARRASSING ABOUT DONALD TRUMP BUT NO DETAILS. >> Stephen: NO DETAILS? WELL, SOME DETAILS. >> Stephen: LIKE WHAT? LIKE SOMETHING ABOUT SHOWER >> STEPHEN: YES. A TYPE OF SHOWER. A TYPE OF SHOWER. IS-- DID THE SHOWER HAVE A PARTICULAR COLOR? >> YEAH, I THINK SO. >> STEPHEN: COULD YOU NAME THE COLOR? WHAT COLOR WAS THE SHOWER? >> SOMETHING ABOUT GOLD, OR YELLOW. >> STEPHEN: YEP, GOLD. AND-- WHO MIGHT HAVE PROVIDED THAT? WAS IT FROM A FAUCET? OR WAS IT-- WHO MIGHT HAVE PROVIDED THE SHOWER? >> SOME GIRLS, MAYBE? >> STEPHEN: SOME GIRLS? JUST, LIKE, SOME FRIENDS? LIKE, SOME P-- JUST STOPPED BY FOR FUN? >> WELL, I DO NOT HAVE THESE KIND OF DETAILS. >> STEPHEN: YOU DON'T HAVE THESE DE-- DETAILS. OKAY. WELL, IN THE UNITED STATES, IT WAS REPORTED THAT WHEN DONALD TRUMP WAS STAYING AT THE RITZ-CARLTON, HE STAYED IN THE PRESIDENTIAL SUITE, WHICH I BELIEVE IS ROOM 1101, AND THAT HE HIRED TWO PROSTITUTES TO PEE IN THE BED BECAUSE THIS ROOM HAD ALSO BEEN OCCUPIED BY BARACK AND MICHELLE OBAMA, AND IT WAS A FORM OF INSULT TO THEM TO HAVE THESE WOMEN COME DO THAT ON THE BED. DID YOU GUYS HEAR THOSE DETAILS OVER HERE? >> YES. >> Stephen: THE IDEA IS THAT THERE WERE SURVEILLANCE CAMERAS IN THIS ROOM BECAUSE THE BUILDING IS WIRED AND THAT THE F.S.B. HAS THIS BECAUSE THEY AUTOMATICALLY HAVE CAMERAS IN THE ROOM AND THEY CAUGHT THIS HAPPENING. >> WELL, THAT MAKES SENSE. >> STEPHEN: DOES MAKE SENSE? >> OKAY. >> STEPHEN: NO ONE FROM AMERICA HAS GONE TO-- TO SEE WHAT THAT ROOM IS LIKE OR TO TRY TO VERIFY THAT STORY IN ANY WAY. WHAT WOULD YOU HAVE TO DO TO-- TO GET ACCESS TO THAT ROOM? >> MAYBE TO CHECK INTO THE HOTEL? >> STEPHEN: THAT SEEMS EXTRAORDINARILY COMPLICATED. BUT WE DID IT. IT'S TRUE, ROOM 1101. THE PRESIDENTIAL SUITE OF THE RITZ CARLTON. WE RENTED IT. HERE'S THE KEY. LET'S GO! ( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ) THE GLAMEROUS RITZ CARLTON PRESIDENTIAL SUITE. CHAMPAGNE DREAMS AND PEE PEE WISHES. TEN GLORIOUS ROOMS, FILLED WITH GRAND PIANOS AND CLOSETS SO BIG YOU COULD HIDE A CORPSE. IT HAS ALL THE MODERN AMENITIES. BUT OF COURSE, THERE IS ONLY ONE REASON TO RENT THIS SUITE. HELLO. JOIN ME, WON'T YOU? IN THE BEDROOM OF THE PRESIDENTIAL SUITE OF THE RITZ CARLTON IN MOSCOW. THE ROOM WE HAVE HEARD SO MUCH ABOUT, AND YET NO ONE HAS COME TO CHECK IT OUT AND I DON'T KNOW WHY. WHEN YOU ARE IN THIS ROOM, I JUST DON'T KNOW HOW TO DESCRIBE IT-- YOU ARE SOAKED IN HISTORY. ( LAUGHTER ) IT WASHES OVER YOU. ( LAUGHTER ) IT'S NOT EVEN LIKE IT'S IN THE PAST-- URINE IN HISTORY. ( LAUGHTER ) URINE IT, YOU KNOW WHAT I AM SAYING? I AM SAYING THAT THE PEE PEE TAPE SUPPOSEDLY TOOK PLACE ON THAT BED, IS WHAT I AM SAYING. THE DOSSIER ALLEGES THAT DONALD TRUMP WAS IN THIS ROOM. WE DON'T KNOW WHERE HE SAT. IT COULD HAVE BEEN ON THIS BENCH DOWN HERE, THOUGH I DOUBT IT BECAUSE THAT IS WHAT YOU'D CALL THE SPLASH ZONE. YOU ARE GOING TO WANT TO WEAR A PONCHO. COULD HAVE BEEN ON THE COUCH, OVER THERE. BUT WHAT WOULD THAT LOOK LIKE? JOIN US, WHEN MY INVESTIGATIVE JOURNALISM CONTINUES. >> STEPHEN: PEE PEE TAPE. PEE PEE TAPE. YOU KNOW WHEN YOU HAVE IMAGINED SOMETHING FOR SO LONG, THAT WHEN YOU FINALLY SEE IT, IT DOESN'T MATCH WHAT YOU PICTURED? THAT'S NOT THIS FEELING AT ALL! ( LAUGHTER ) THIS IS RIGHT ON THE MONEY. HOLY COW. THAT'S THE KREMLIN, RIGHT THERE! THEY WOULDN'T EVEN NEED CAMERAS IN THIS ROOM-- PUTIN COULD WATCH WITH BINOCULARS. WITH MY INITIAL SURVEY COMPLETE, ANDREI REJOINED THE INVESTIGATION. BECAUSE THE PRESIDENTIAL SUITE IS KNOWN TO BE UNDER SURVEILLANCE, WE SWEPT THE ROOM FOR CAMERAS AND LISTENING DEVICES. THEY COULD BE ANYWHERE, EVEN THE POTTERY. IS THERE ANY WAY OF KNOWING IF THERE'S LISTENING DEVICES IN HERE? >> WELL, FOR THAT YOU NEED SPECIAL EQUIPMENT. >> Stephen: OR YOU COULD BREAK IT OPEN? >> THAT'S ALSO AN OPTION. >> Stephen: YEAH. OBVIOUSLY. >> Stephen: YEAH, THERE'S KNOT IN THERE. ( PHONE RINGING ) >> Stephen: HELLO? (INAUDIBLE). >> Stephen: THERE IS AN EMERGENCY BUTTON IN MY ROOM? >> (INAUDIBLE). >> Stephen: NO, EVERYTHING IS GREAT. THANK YOU. THANK YOU FOR CHECKING. YEAH, THEY'RE ON TO US. YEAH. THA THAT WAS ANDREI'S CUE TO LEAVE. BUT I WASN'T DONE. SO, WHO KNOWS WHAT REALLY HAPPENED IN THIS ROOM? SCIENCE DOES, AND TONIGHT, SCIENCE IS ON YOUR SIDE. HIT THE LIGHTS. ( CHEERING ) LET'S INVESTIGATE. I WANT TO THANK ACTION NEWS TEAM CHANNEL 53 FOR LENDING ME THEIR BLACK LIGHT. OKAY, I'M GOING IN. THIS PILLOW LOOKS CLEAN. THAT CHECKS OUT, NO EVIDENCE THERE. OH, I GOT SOMETHING. "FAKE NEWS, NEVER HAPPENED, SAD. SADDER STILL, I'D COME 5,000 MILES TO FIND THE PEE PEE TAPE, AND WAS LEAVING WITH NO PROOF THAT DONALD TRUMP WAS EVER HERE. WORST OF ALL, THIS ROOM WAS EXTREMELY EXPENSIVE SO THIS IS WHERE I'M STAYING TONIGHT. GUYS, YOU CAN GO. WOULD YOU MIND KILLING THE LIGHTS ON YOUR WAY OUT? AHHH! ( SNORING ) DO YOU MIND? >> SORRY, STEPHEN, MY BAD. NIGHT NIGHT. ( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ) >> STEPHEN: THANK YOU, RITZ CARLTON, AND SORRY ABOUT THIS. JOIN ME TOMORROW FOR THE EXCITING CONCLUSION OF RUSSIA WEEK. BECAUSE UNLIKE THE RUSSIA SCANDALS, THIS WEEK WILL EVENTUALLY BE OVER. WE'LL BE RIGHT BACK WITH JASON BATEMAN. ( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ) ( BAND PLAYING )
Info
Channel: The Late Show with Stephen Colbert
Views: 3,801,219
Rating: 4.3540759 out of 5
Keywords: The Late Show, Stephen Colbert, Colbert, Late Show, celebrities, late night, talk show, skits, bit, monologue, The Late Late Show, Late Late Show, letterman, david letterman, comedian, impressions, CBS, joke, jokes, funny, funny video, funny videos, humor, celebrity, celeb, hollywood, famous, James Corden, Corden, Comedy
Id: Lk1uBMZOaXc
Channel Id: undefined
Length: 11min 31sec (691 seconds)
Published: Fri Jul 21 2017
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👍︎︎ 1 👤︎︎ u/AutoModerator 📅︎︎ Jul 21 2017 🗫︎ replies

I really hate the guy that goes, "yeah yeah..naw naw" in the background. Every single episode.

👍︎︎ 1 👤︎︎ u/Metricrumdied 📅︎︎ Jul 21 2017 🗫︎ replies
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