Stepdad Took Mom & His Kids on Vacation Without Telling Me—So I Left Too

so I'm a 16-year-old guy still in high school about two years ago my Mom married my stepdad Jake my mom's 41 and Jake's 43 my parents were never married to each other actually they only got together for a really short time after college and they thought it would just be a brief thing but then my mom got pregnant with me she decided to keep the baby and my dad wanted to be in my life too so they figured out a way to share taking care of me I live with my mom for one month and then with my dad the next month and it goes back and forth like that all year I really love both my parents and I know they've both given up a lot just to make sure they could be there for me one of the biggest things they've done is they both stayed living in the same city this makes it easier for me to move between their houses without it being a huge hassle I didn't know this when I was younger but now I understand that both of them passed up some big job opportunities just to stay close to each other and to me they did all this just for me my mom even turned down a bunch of guys who really liked her because she wanted to focus on raising me instead of getting married and having to juggle her job a new husband and everything else that comes with that I learned all this stuff from Jake kind of indirectly he's not the greatest stepdad to be honest and my mom has been telling me all these things because she wants me to try to get along with Jake she thinks that since she made all these sacrifices for me I should be able to make a little effort to accept him but it's tough because it's not like I asked her to make those sacrifices for me she could have made different choices like not having me or letting my dad Raise Me by himself but anyway I never argued with her about any of this because I love her and I wanted to be happy so I was ready to accept Jake even though he was not a very nice guy and by not a nice guy I don't mean that he is mean to me in any way whatsoever I just mean that he doesn't like me and he doesn't bother to hide it I don't know what kind of 42-year-old has issues with a 16-year-old guy but he definitely does I don't know why he doesn't like me because I never did anything to piss him off and as a matter of fact I've always tried to be nice to him because that's how my family has raised me to be nice to everybody even when they show you that they don't like you he never speaks to me rudely and never makes comments about me as a reason behind that is that he doesn't speak to me at all he pretends like I don't exist in the family and this has been going on for the past 3 years I literally have no idea what I ever did to piss him off but one day he just decided that he was not going to speak to me and he was going to start acting like I was not there at all it is the weirdest thing in the world and I'm not really used to this kind of treatment it's like he's giving me the cold shoulder for something but I don't know what it is so I can't even fix my behavior because I don't even know what his problem with me is my mother says that that's just the way he is he does not have a problem with me but he doesn't necessarily like me either however I feel like if you don't like somebody there should at least be a reason for it especially when you're 42 and the other person is literally just 16 I guess it has something to do with the Dynamics of me being my mother's first child child or whatever I don't even know but the bottom line is that he does not like me and he has made it very obvious earlier we used to get on okay and the first couple of times that he came home he would interact with me and ask me all sorts of questions about my life and I would be very polite and answer him but after one visit he just decided that he was not going to speak to me it was very random and I did not understand why he did that at the time I did not question it because I thought maybe he had just forgotten to say hi to me or whatever but then it happened so many times it became hard to ignore so I even asked my mother if I had done something to make him angry because he was acting like I was not there in the house and he would turn his face away every time I entered the living room or any room that he was in and she did not tell me anything about it she just said that he was trying to wrap his head around the fact that now he would have to deal with me being there all the time and maybe he was just not used to it because before this he had only dated women who did not have kids I found that hard to believe because he himself had two kids he had two sons one was 15 and the other was 12 their mother had passed away in an accident after the younger sibling was born also it was not true that I would be there all the time because as I had mentioned above I used to go to my dad's house to live with him every other month but anyway a few months passed that way and eventually I just accepted the fact that this was how he was and he was not going to speak to me anymore after a year of being in a relationship he proposed to my mother and they got married a few months later after their marriage Jake moved into the house with his kids before that I had only met his children a couple of times and even they had been taught by their father not to speak to me it was just so crazy and I don't even know how I dealt with that for so long for years as a matter of fact before getting married Jake and my mother used to live separately because Jake's mother was really sick and she used to live with them but after they got married he decided to move her in with his sister so she would be able to take care of her and he moved in with my mom into our house with his children I don't know if any of you guys have never experienced this but it's really not easy to live in the same house with a bunch of people who won't talk to you and pretend that you don't even exist but I had to put up with that and it made me feel really bad because I felt like I was a criminal of some sort judging by the way they treated me the worst part was that I never got to find out what I did wrong in the first place I still have no idea but at least I'm not living with them anymore so it doesn't matter anyway years passed and their behavior did not change even though I got used to it I was already used to Jake not speaking to me whenever he would come over to visit my mother which was quite frequent and after they got married I got used to him and his kids living in the same house with me and not speaking to me every time I would go to my mother's place I would have to prepare myself mentally to only talk to my mother for the next couple of weeks she was the only person who would speak to me in that house and everybody else pretended like I was not there like I was invisible it was hurtful but I did want to spend time with my mother so I had to deal with it because I knew that she was not going to talk to Jake about it trust me I had tried to convince her a numerous times to talk to him about it and get to the bottom of this or at least try to solve it but she told me that she had already spoken to him about it and there were a couple of personal reasons that she could not disclose to me which is why he refused to acknowledge my existence in the house and she could not do anything about it because she understood where he was coming from and she also understood why I felt bad about it but I would just have to suck it up and deal with it if I tried to argue with her then stand up for myself she would get all emotional and tell me that I was being ungrateful because I was overlooking the fact that she had made so many sacrifices for me so I could surely just give Jake a pass for behaving with me the way that he did and just deal with it for her sake I wanted to fight with her but I did not want to hurt her feelings I never even told my father about any of this because I knew that if he got to find out about it he would be very upset and would definitely drag my mother for this they were very different people and had very different ideas on how to bring me up so they kept having little arguments and fights but I knew that something this huge would probably lead to my father filing for full custody or something extreme I did not want to stir up drama so I avoided telling him and pretended that everything was fine with my mother and her new family Jake and my mother had been together for one year before they got married and it has been 2 years since they have been living together so I have been putting up with this sort of behavior for 3 years now and I have been pushed to my limit and stretched very thin recently what happened was what really pushed me off the edge and I decided that I was no longer going to put up with this last month I was supposed to be spending the month at my mother's house and as usual Jake and his kids had been ignoring me I was already going through a rough patch because I have been fighting with a couple of my friends from school and I was really not in the right head space at the time so about 2 weeks ago when I woke up one morning and I realized that the house was absolutely empty I started losing my mind over it even up until the night before everything had been normal or as normal as it gets in my mother's house they have been all talking to each other and ignoring me but there was no mention of them going anywhere at the time but when I woke up the next morning I saw that the house was empty and I immediately called my mother up to ask about it I had no idea where they were but thankfully my mother did answer the call when I asked what they were playing at she told me that she Jake and the kids were going out on a little trip for the week and asked me to stay in the house and take care of it I'm on summer break right now so I don't have school and I don't really have to go anywhere but I don't think it's appropriate to leave me at home all by myself and expect me to act like a watchdog I was not on board with that plan and I told my mother was my step I was not ready to stay at home all day and watch the house if she wanted something like that she probably should have just amped up the security around her house instead of tricking me into staying home I was also just mostly upset that they had not even told me about their plan to go out on the road trip and left me at home all by myself they didn't even have the courtesy of letting me know about it beforehand so I could decide for myself if I wanted to do it or not I probably just would have said yes because as a high School guy there is literally nothing more that we want than an empty house all to ourselves I probably would have invited a couple of my friends over and lived it up for a few days but I was so pissed off that I didn't even feel like doing that because my mother was treating me like crap and it made me feel really bad I was also fighting with my friends so I did not really have anybody to invite at the time and I was just going through an overall bad time and I told my mother that she needed to apologize to me for doing this and I could understand that Jake did not like talking to me but the bare minimum that they could do was at least tell me that they were going out somewhere before they left it was not very nice to just wake up one morning and realize that you were all alone and she told me that I was making a big deal out of this and that I needed to get over it she did not even wait for me to respond she just hung up the call when I tried to call her back she did not accept it and texted me back saying that she was trying to enjoy her trip and that she would talk to me once she was at the hotel I was so upset about everything that I decided to leave I knew that it would mean that the house would be completely empty but I didn't care I had tried to call my mother after that to let her know that I was leaving but she did not answer my call and everything went straight to voicemail so I locked up the house and kept the keys of the house under a potted plant which my mother usually does when she leaves and then I went over to my dad's place to live with him once I got there he was actually surprised to see me back so early because he had expected me to return after one week since I was supposed to be living with my mother until the end of the month but I have had enough so I just came back to him and I ended up telling him everything that had been going on I told him all about Jake and his ridiculously heavy around me and how he had even trained his kids not to talk to me I felt like I had done something wrong but I didn't even know what and it was getting on my nerves then I told him how my mother did not even want to talk to him about this and just let everything go on the way it was no matter how much it hurt me her excuse for that was that she believed that he had his personal reasons and they were valid but she was not even willing to tell me what those reasons were so I was be able to make sense of what was going on around me I had put up with this for long enough just for my mother's sake I wanted her to be happy and she kept reminding me that she had made so many sacrifices for me in her life so I could do this for her but this was getting way too much to take I was not going to tolerate it anymore and I was done I had to tell my father about it because he deserved to know what my mother was putting me through and maybe he would be able to do something about the situation because I was just so sick and tired of being treated like this even when I have not done anything to piss anyone off and I have always tried my best to be kind and compassionate towards everybody then I told him about how my mother had left me at home alone without even telling me that she and her husband and his kids were going out and she just expected me to agree to take care of the house and make sure that everything was in its place and live on my own for the next week just because she wanted to take a trip that was not even my biggest problem my problem with that was she did not even think that it was important to tell me about it when I tried to talk to her she just kept hanging up and declining my calls like I was not even important to her she had really crossed a line and I couldn't put up with this anymore after I was done telling my father about all of this I started crying because I didn't realize just how much all of this had been weighing on me for the past couple of years I did have a normal relationship with my mother before that but after she got together with Jake everything changed and nothing was the same anymore I felt like I was insignificant to her and it was very difficult for me to accept after venting to my father about all of this he just said one thing to me and that was that he was going to take care of everything for me now he was obviously very upset but whatever that he had to say to my mother he did not say any of it to me you just told me that he was really glad that I had shared this with him and now it was all off my chest he told me that I was going to be living with him and if I wanted to go back to my mother that was my choice but he would not suggest doing that to me anyway I'd been living with him and I did not try to call my mother after that day and the funny part was that she didn't try to call me either the least that she could have done was try to keep in touch with her son whom she had left at home all on his own while she traveled with her new family I was really emotionally hurt by what she was doing but after speaking to my father I was feeling considerably lighter and I had decided that I was not going to let this bother me for about 5 days we have no contact and then when she finally called me I thought it was going to be to check up on me but when I answered the call she was yelling at me at the top of her lungs they took me a few seconds to realize that she was yelling at me because I had left the house and they had been robbed apparently a lot of stuff that they had left in the house was now gone including that television and a couple of other expensive items for some reason she was blaming me all for it I don't know why she was doing that because I had tried to call her and inform her that I was leaving and I was going to stay with my father after she had stopped yelling I told her that I was not happy about the way she had been treating me and I had tried to contact her several times after she had hung up but she kept declining my calls so she told me that I could have texted her and as valid as her point was I told her that I didn't do it on purpose because I was mad I thought it was very obvious and I had made it very clear to her that I was upset so she should not have expected me to stay back in the first place we got into a massive fight about it because she believed that I should have stayed at home no matter how angry or upset I was because this was a matter of safety and she had been trusting me and counting on me but I did not tell her to do that in fact I had tried my very best to let her know that I was leaving and I did not want to stay at home alone but she disregarded all of my calls so now she had to pay the price for it these were the consequences of her actions not mine I found it very ridiculous that they were trying to blame this all on me including Jake the first time that he spoke to me in the last couple of years and it was only to yell at me and blame me for my carelessness and he said a couple of other very confusing things as well like he had always known that I would be the cause of ruin for them I don't even know what that is supposed to mean because we don't even interact I don't know how he came to that conclusion without even speaking to me anyway my parents are now fighting because my dad thinks that this is my mom's fault and so do I but she thinks that this is my fault and now my mother is demanding that my father pay her for the damages since she thinks that if he is defending me for doing this he should be ready to pay the price for it I don't understand what to do now and she will only drop it if I at least apologize to her and her family I don't want to do that but I also don't want her to keep bothering my father either AA for leaving my mother's house unoccupied to go live with my father because she and my stepdad left me home alone to go on a trip with his family without even bothering to inform me update 1 so it has been two weeks since the incident and a lot of things have come to light since then first of all I was finally able to figure out why Jake hated me so much apparently as it turns out when they had first started dating Jake had asked my mother if he could bring his mother over to live with them my mom had said no because she was not comfortable with the idea of them moving in together so soon and definitely not okay with the idea of her mother-in-law who was ailing to come live with her she thought that it would be too much work for her and was not up for it even though Jake had made it very clear that she had a full-time nurse to look after her and she just needed people to be around for her emotional needs my mother was already not ready to move in with Jake and be together and she did not want the extra baggage of having her mother-in-law live with her but instead of being being upfront with him she pinned it all on to me and this was about 3 months into their relationship we were getting pretty serious about each other at that point even though I think it was way too soon for them but anyway that's my mother's choice and I don't want to comment on that she had basically lied to Jake and told them that she would be okay with him moving in with her and bringing his mom and kids along to live with us but she was not sure if it was such a good idea because of me she had made me sound like some juvenile delinquent and told him that she had dated a couple of men in the past P but they had all been driven away because of me apparently I terrorized her boyfriend because I wanted to protect her and keep everybody away since I still believed that I could reunite my parents and she did not want to break my heart she also did not want Jake's mother to suffer because of me because she had told him that I had a lot of comments to make about his family she had told Jake that I had referred to his mother as a useless burden on the family and I had told her that if she moved in with us then I would make sure that she suffered for it something that I would never say because that's just not me and I know how insensitive it is and apparently I had referred to his kids as little evil goblins who were going to ruin our family obviously after that he had stopped interacting with me at all because he did not want anything to do with me he had actually believe my mother even though I had always acted very normally around him and he had no reason to believe her I found out about it a couple of days ago since Jake had been pushing my mother to disown me and cut all ties with me because of what I had done and thought that it was about time but she did not want to do that so she finally had to come clean to him and now they are living separately because Jake could not believe that he had been treating me so badly over a bunch of lies that my mother had fed him just because she was too afraid to tell him the truth that it was she who was against having his sick mother live with them and not me in that email he even mentioned that he would not have had an issue if my mother had been honest with him and told him that she did not have the bandwidth to deal with a sick person in the house and he would have just spoken into his sister and made sure that they took turns taking care of their mom but she chose to lie to him and made up such a horrible story about me that he believed and kept mistreating me he sent me an email to apologize to me for everything that he had put me through and hoped that I would forgive him I have not responded to it yet because I don't know how to feel about any of this right now and I just want to keep my head clear and not think about any of this at the moment but anyway that's why he had been mistreating me for so long and my mother had been allowing it in fact it had been working out in her favor perfectly and she had been feeding him all sorts of lies about how I kept getting in trouble at school and he never even questioned it because he trusted her blindly we never spoke so he never found out that I was actually quite a normal guy and that kept my mother's cover from getting blown she is one twisted lady I have to say that my father is now filing for full custody after we got to know all of this and my mother is devastated because she claims that she loved us and wanted us to be a happy family together but I'm sorry you can't have a happy family on your own terms and ruin everybody else's life update two my dad is filing for full custody of me which is a big deal on its own but that's not all Jake who is my mom's current husband is also filing for divorce from her I stumbled upon this huge mess because my mom has been desperately sending messages to my dad she's basically pleading with him to have a chat with Jake to try and fix their marriage because she claims she can't bear the thought of losing all of us but to be honest I'm really confused about why she would think any of us would want to stay St in and help her out after everything she's allowed to happen for so many years she stood by and did nothing while I was treated poorly worse she was the one spreading lies about me to Jake which only fueled his and his family's dislike towards me it's truly heartbreaking to think about especially coming from your own mother no one should ever have to go through being betrayed and talked down by their own parent I spent countless nights trying to figure out what I had done to deserve such hostility from Jake and his family what could I possibly have done to make them hate me so much but the truth eventually hit me I hadn't done anything at all my mom had been manipulating the story to make herself look better or maybe to keep her marriage with Jake smooth on her end without any regard for how it was affecting me this realization was tough and it led me to a difficult decision I've decided to cut off all contact with her I blocked her number her social media everything I just can't subject myself to any more of her deceit and manipulation it's a heartbreaking decision especially because despite everything I did love her I wanted her to be happy and I put up with so much nonsense and pain because of that love for years I kept thinking her happiness mattered more than mine I put her first hoping that maybe just maybe she would start to appreciate me and love me the way a mother should but it became painfully clear that she was only focused on her own happiness it's a harsh truth but I've come to accept it and so here I am no longer willing to sacrifice my own well-being for hers it's not an easy shift to make but it's necessary for my own peace and happiness now both of us are on the same page her focusing on her happiness and me finally on mine the tables have turned and I'm ready to move forward without that weight on my shoulders it's time I put myself first for a change update three so it's all over the news in my circle Jake my mom's husband has officially filed for divorce like literally that's all anyone can talk about right now my family some friends that both my parents know just about everybody now my mom is handling this whole divorce thing in a pretty odd way instead of maybe talking to people directly or trying to sort things out quietly she's all over social media posting these really sad quotes it's like every day there's a new gloomy post from her and I know this because my cousins keep sending me screenshots of her posts I guess they think I should see what's going on or maybe they just find it as weird as I do I'm not really sure what my mom is hoping to achieve by sharing all these sad quotes maybe she thinks it'll get her some sympathy or maybe even change Jake's mind but honestly posting sad stuff online isn't really going to fix the problems they have it seems like she's just trying to get people to feel sorry for her but here's the thing she played a big part in how everything turned out it's like there's an old saying that fits perfectly here you made your bed now you have to lie in it that means she's made some choices maybe not the best ones and now she has to deal with the consequences of those choices even if they're pretty tough so while all these posts might make her feel a bit better or get her some attention they're not really going to change the situation the divorce is happening and those sad quotes on social media aren't going to stop it it's a tough spot for everyone involved and it's kind of messy to see it all unfold like this especially in such a public way update 4 so it's been a few months now and my dad officially has full custody of me my mom did try really hard to fight for custody but with the divorce and all the drama that came with it things got really complicated for her plus we had a lot of evidence showing the stuff she had put me through so honestly she didn't really have much of a chance to win the case her lawyer did manage to keep the case going for a couple of months though now that my dad has full custody I don't have to visit my mom unless I choose to she still has the right to see me sometimes like on certain weekends or holidays that's what visitation rights mean but to be honest I don't really see the point because I don't even want to talk to her anymore I'm doing much better now that I'm just living with my dad life has been pretty good I've also patched things things up with my friends which feels great it's like I'm finally getting back to normal you know I'm really looking forward to moving on from all the tough stuff that happened and just focusing on good things ahead

Channel: Qley

Views: 228,767

Keywords:

Id: lk26rmDIAAs

Length: 24min 9sec (1449 seconds)

Published: Fri May 17 2024