Where did I go wrong? Oh! Here you go. Huh? I don't need charity, plumber. Charity was when Nintendo took you in, You ungrateful thirty-two-bit failure! That's it! Huh? Too slow! Hmm? Huh? Oh? Mamma-mia! Time to shave that mustache clean off! You're just like Sega! Always bowing down to the competition! Wow! You'll be flattened on the road like most of your
relatives! Maybe, I'll make a suit out of you! You sadist! Lousy Sega mascot! You're an embarrassment to the great nation of Japan! You are Italian! That pyromaniac will burn the mushroom kingdom! Where will I find a job if he does that? Woohoo! Nintendo number one! Oh! Sonic almost lost! How pathetic. You dare hit me! Pay attention to me! What? Oh! Fool, I can fly! Chaos Spear! Huh? What? Huh? Behold, the ultimate power! Stop ignoring me! No more games, farewell. Oh, mamma! You freak! You! Well, if it isn't "Fan-fiction the Hedgehog"! You faker! You're a disgrace to all hedgehog kind! Whatever you say, Vegeta! Huh? Pathetic. The truth can really hurt! Begone impostor! You can't escape! Huh? You're tough! Not bad for my rival! Your rival? Sorry but I already have a guy. He's called Metal Sonic, not edgy, dark Sonic! Enough of your jokes, show me your full power! Wow, way to sound original! Whatever, let's do it. So do we stare at each other for 10 minutes now? No, this is for YouTube, every second counts. You're hard to destroy. This is why you weren't in Sonic Mania! I mean, even Knack the Weasel had a cameo, Stop trying so hard! Your insolence ends now! Just shut up and spin dude! I'm not done yet! What? Here we go! Dude, what's going on!? Round Two! Lousy Sega mascot! You again? Don't you have a princess to rescue or something? She can rescue herself for once, it's 2020! How progressive of you. It only took like forty years. At least I have a job. How's your movie career going? That's a low-blow plumber! Still too slow! Chaos Control! Here you go! Oh yeah! Nintendo number one! Oh, you're doing the super shiny
thing, like in the Ball of the Dragon. No this is totally different, I'm Hyper Sonic! Hmmm, looks the same. I'm shinier than him. Mamma-mia! Stop being so fast, hedge- I think I like try-hard Shadow better. Now witness the power of Nintendo and Sega combined! That already exists, it's called Mario and Sonic at the Olympics! Time for a new franchise Mario and Shadow, Mushroom Chaos! Why is everyone in this series trying to kill me!? Out of time? Finally, it's Mario and Shadow time! I'm coming, Sonic! Huh? Hmm! What's your problem, green Mario? Maybe that was a bit much. Luigi wins! Finally, Luigi will make tanooki suit! How unsanitary! It's Gooigi time! Huh? Back for more and greener than ever I see. What are you? Jello pudding? What have I done? Slime time! I did it! Let me out! Let me out! I have to save Sonic! You'll lose! Mario will skin you alive and wear your tails as wings! We can beat him together! Come on, green Mario! Don't you want to be number one? Brother! Luigi, perfect timing. I was just about to go for a number two, and needed some encouragement. I'm done living in your Shadow! Go, flying tanooki! For Sega! Good job green Mario! Finally, Luigi will be Nintendo's mascot! Remember the deal, you get me in Smash Bros, and not as DLC! Sure. What is this? The Revenge of the Sidekicks? Huh? What's the matter Tails, can't react? It's roasted tanooki time! Stop! No, you went kaboom! I still have two lives left! Really? That's what we're going with? Look dude it is what it is, we're not doing Citizen Kane here! I'm Sonic! I mean have you typed my name on YouTube? Get him, Sonic! Psst, Shadow. Thank you creepy internet! Let's do it! Mia-mamma, enough! Oh,. I'll make mortadella out of you! Where's knuckles when you need him? You have me! It's Super Luigi time! Oh, Luigi, you really are the worst. I must break you. We're definitely on the dark side of the internet now. You're mine, hedgehog! Spin the fast, my fuzzy comrade! Papa! No more edgy nonsense, I want to be a fun rival. Please! Teach me, big brother! Hey, what is all this? Luigi! Why do you look like a hairless Donkey Kong? Fear not brother, I and my furry friends defeated your evil clone! Oh well, you guys want to go grab some spaghetti and chili dogs? I do need to keep my carbs up! The End!
