Sonic: Ohhhhhhh. How are my going to pay all these bills? (sigh) Internet bills. Power bills. Water bills. Oh my god, I can't believe this. Oh my god. This is too much stress right now, I have to go watch TV, so I can calm down. Uhhh. This is too much! Okay, let me see what's on TV. Hopefully something good for me to chill out on. (switches channels) TV Narrator: Hey! TV Narrator: Are you financially struggling? Sonic: Yes. TV Narrator: Are you trying to pay your bills? Sonic: Yes. TV Narrator: Well in this case. You should play- Squid Game! It's where you compete in children's games. For a chance to win the cash prize of- Believe it or not... 45 Million Dollars! (kaching) Sonic: What? 45 million dollars? TV Narrator: There will be a lot of fun games. Like red light, green light. Scratching out caramel shaped candy. Tug of war. And a big shocking final game at the very end. So if you want to join make sure you call 8650 4006, in order for you chance to join. Hope to see you soon. Sonic: Wait what?! All I have to do is call the number and enter for my chance to win? Oh my god, where's my phone? Oh there it is! (phone ringing) Oh please, please, please answer the phone! Oh my gosh. Red Soldier: State your name. Sonic: Wait... Are you working at the Squid Game Competition? Red Soldier: Yes. Sonic: Oh, okay! Well, my name is Sonic the Hedgehog. And I'd really like to join your competition. And... Join with my friends. Red Soldier: What's their names? Sonic: Oh, well. I have Miles "Tails" Prower. Knuckles the Echidna. Silver the Hedgehog. Shadow the Hedgehog. Cream the Rabbit and- Amy Rose. Or as I'd like to call her Rosy the Rascal I mean seriously. SHE'S SUCH A RASCAL! Red Soldier: What's your address? Sonic: Oh! Well! My address is- Red Soldier: Thank you for the information, the competition will begin tomorrow. We hope to see you and your friends soon. Sonic: Oh! Well thank you so much I can't wait! (hangs up the phone) (sigh) Oh my god, this is going to be so much fun- (doorbell) Who's at the door? Oh Silver you have the door, who was it? Silver: Ummm, I don't know but there's this weird card that's made out of cardboard. Sonic: Oh. Must be a little card to Squid Game. Silver: Squid what? Sonic: Oh yeah I should probably tell you, But I saw a commercial, that will give out a grand prize of 45 million dollars, just if we win some children's games. Silver: Ummm, Sonic are you sure that it's not a scam. Sonic: Oh no Silver I mean it was on TV. And TV never lies. (in a creepy voice) Silver: Ummm, I don't know how to feel about that Sonic I mean, Did you tell the people working there our address? Sonic: Yes. Silver: Wha, Sonic that's dangerous we could possibly get scammed. Or hurt! Sonic: Woah Silver, it seemed legit to me! But! If there's any damages from anyone then I'll take all the blame. Silver: Ummm okay well I guess I'll tell everyone that, we'll join. Squid Game I guess. Sonic: Okay Silver. Sonic: (sigh) Now I feel relieved. (closes the door) Well. I might as well cook myself some chili-dogs. And relax, man, this is going to be fun. Sonic: Okie-dokie, I got my ingredients, to make myself a tasty chili-dog. But wait! Where's my mustard and chili? I thought we had some, hold on let me check. God, it's gotta be here around here somewhere, where could it possibly be. Hmmm. (closes a cabinet door) Well I might as well have myself a plain hot dog then. (sniffs 2 times) Wha? Wait? Where is the smoke coming from? (coughs 3 times) Oh my god! (smoke appears and a ringing noise builds up as the music turns echoey and drains out Sonic's voice) I feel woozy. Oh my god, please don't tell me there's a fire (coughs 3 more times) Oh my god- (coughs 2 more times) Uhhh, uhhhh, uhhhhh... OH GOD WHAT IS HAPPENING?! (tries to breathe in) (Sonic screams and coughs as he gets overcome with smoke and falls down onto the ground in a first person shot). (a ringing noise appears 3 more times as Sonic gets dragged out of the kitchen by an unknown figure) (Sonic wakes up in a first person shot after being overcome with smoke) Uhhh, uhh, uhh. Uhhhhhhhhh. Sonic: Ohhhhh, god, what just happened? Wha, wha, what's... What's going on? Wha... Mario? Luigi? Mario: Ohhhh, ohhh mamma-mia. Where am I? Sonic: Mario, what are you doing in our house? Mario: Wha, I don't know. All I know is that I signed up myself and Luigi, for a game called Squid Game? Hold on I think- Yeah I have the card it's over here. Sonic: Wha- Tha, that's... Tha, that's the same card that, I got. Tha. That's what I signed up for. Wha- Bugs? Daffy? Bugs Bunny: Uhhhhh, what's up doc? Sonic: Did you sign yourself up for Squid Game? Bugs Bunny: Sure did doc! Really wanted to join so I can have some fun, and stir up some wackiness with Daffy. Daffy: Uhhhhh, uhhhh! I can hear you loud and clear Bugsy! Uhh! And I also joined so I can be rich, rich, RICH! Sonic: Umm okay... Wait is that? Is that Dr. Quack? Ummm, (wakes up Dr. Quack) Sonic: Hello? Dr. Quack: Uhhhh, uhhhh, where am I? Sonic: You're in my house, but... I have no idea what's going on. I just got knocked out with smoke and then I ended up here. Dr. Quack: Well that's creepy I mean, this can't be where the, game takes place. Sonic: You joined Squid Game too. Why? Dr. Quack: Because I have to pay my bills and if I don't, I'll end up being homeless with my sweet wife and two kids. Sonic: Aren't you a doctor, why can't you pay them easily? Dr. Quack: Oh trust me you don't know how much chaos I have to deal with at home. (a gunshot goes off, Luigi screams and everyone wakes up) Tails: Oh my god. What was that sound? What's happening? Red Soldier: Contestants, you, Are about to play three games in this competition, with a very big one at the very end, if you lose at any point, any time... You will be eliminated. And you will lose your chance to win the cash prize. Sonic: Okay, okay, but why is this taking place in my house this feels a little bit iffy and, a bit invasive to me. Mario: (excited) I know what the cash prize is! It will definitely help me a lot after paying a bunch of celebrities, to join my upcoming movie coming next year, in December! Awwwwww, this should be good! Silver: So, this is the game that you signed us up for? Sonic: I guess it is Silver, I guess it is. Cream: Uhhhhh, what are the games? Red Soldier: We can't tell you until you see for yourself. Cream: Ummm, okay. Red Soldier: Before we continue anything else, I want to get a headshot photo of each of you, one by one, please line up for your picture and once everyone has their photos, the game shall commence. Sonic: Okay, here we go...are you ready? Tails: I'm not too sure about this Sonic. Sonic; Oh Tails it's going to be okay, if we win the games, we get the cash prize, and then it's done. Come on, let's go take our pictures. (a violin score takes place when the main competitors take their pictures) Shadow: How did I even get here? Daffy: Hold on! Before you take my picture, let me just make myself look sexy- (picture taken). YOU'RE DESPICABLE! Sonic: Okay guys, as long as we stick together, we should be able to win the game and win the prize. Voice Monitor: Players, please make your way to the garden, I repeat, players, please make your way to the garden. Knuckles: Ohhhh boy. Sonic: Okay I guess we're gonna start the game, here we go. Sonic: Okay guys we're here but, (grunts) I forgot what the next game was. Voice Monitor: For your very first game of this competition, you will be playing Red Light, Green Light. Voice Monitor: I repeat, for your very first game of this competition, you will be playing Red Light, Green Light. Voice Monitor: What you have to do is make sure you go to the swing chair within 3 minutes. When the doll says green light, you can go, But when it says red light, You have to freeze in the position that you're currently in, before any movement is detected. If your movement is detected during red light. You will be eliminated. Knuckles: This isn't too bad. Luigi: Oh I'm going to make it there before you can even say spaghettios. (starts running) (doll turns around, the game starts and everyone starts running). [mu-gung-hwa kko-chi pi-oet-sum-ni-da]. The Mugunghwa flower bloomed. (doll turns around and Luigi falls). Luigi: Ow! Ow! My toe. (the dolls detects motion and finds out Luigi is moving). Luigi: Ah- (gasps) Ohhhhh, mamma-mi- (gets shot) Voice Monitor: Luigi has been eliminated. Mario: Oh why are you such a drama queen Luigi? (whispers to himself) (the doll turns around and everyone starts running again). [mu-gung-hwa kko-chi pi-oet-sum-ni-da]. The Mugunghwa flower bloomed. (the doll turns around again to detect motion). Mario: Oh come on Luigi, oh come on you're eliminated you can move now. Daffy: (gasps as he finds out he is moving). (the gun is prepared). Daffy: mother. (Daffy gets shot). Bugs Bunny: (gasps) Voice Monitor: Daffy has been eliminated. (Bugs screams and gets shot). Voice Monitor: Bugs has been eliminated. (Amy screams for her life). (Amy gets shot and Cream tries to move herself). Voice Monitor: Amy has been eliminated. (Cream gets shot). Voice Monitor: Cream has been eliminated. (the doll turns around). [mu-gung-hwa] Sonic: Oh my freaking god! [sum-ni-da] (the dolls turns around to detect motion and then turns back around again). [mu-gung-hwa] Knuckles: Guys, we better starting running, now! Sonic: He's right Tails, come on, let's go. Silver: Sonic we have to make it to the swing chair or else the time will run out. Shadow: Come on! (everyone runs) (Tails nearly falls onto the ground until Knuckles catches him). [mu-gung-hwa kko-chi pi-oet-sum-ni-da]. The Mugunghwa flower bloomed. (Sonic pants 4 times) Sonic: Oh my god. Dr. Quack. What are you doing? Dr. Quack: I, I..........I can't move. What is happening I'm- I'm scared. Sonic: Listen, you have to make it to the swing chair, or the time will run out. Dr. Quack: I can't. Sonic: You have to! Think about your family and the possibilities of you winning! Don't you wanna live? Voice Monitor: Time has run out. All remaining players will be, eliminated. (Silver gasps). (the gun is prepared). Dr. Quack: (quietly cries to himself) God, please have mercy- (Dr. Quack gets shot). Voice Monitor: All remaining players have been eliminated. (Sonic's gasps are echoed as the music rises ending with a cut scream). (Beethoven's "Moonlight Sonata" Orchestral Arrangement plays in the background). Sonic: Oh my god. What the actual hell did I just see? What the actual hell did I just witness?! Mario: Sonic, does it even matter? Mario: I mean, they were all pretty much failures in their own lifes, so I really, really, don't, care about any of them. Sonic: What? Are you serious? Did you not see what just happened? The game killed my friends, it killed a father. And it killed your brother. Mario: Honestly I don't care about Luigi, I just care about my career and my business, so, deal with it. (Sonic punches Mario in the face). Sonic: Why you sunnavah freaking- Tails: Stop it! Stop it! Stop it! Stop it! Stop it! Stop it! STOP IT! Sonic: Get off me! GET OFF ME! Red Soldier: Congratulations contestants, you made it to the first game. Sonic: What the hell was that? Red Soldier: As we said before, anyone who fails to comply with the rules shall be eliminated. Sonic: Well screw this, I'm done, I'm not doing this anymore! Shadow: Sonic! Sonic: What! Shadow: You stop playing and you will make everyone's death feel like it was for nothing. It's too late. Sonic: (sighs) Fine I guess we'll continue. Red Soldier: Very well then. Now make your way to the kitchen for the next game to proceed. Sonic: Oh, great! What is it going to be this time! Silver: Do you know what the next game will be? Mario: Honestly, I don't know. Sonic: (gasps) I know what's next. Silver: Wha-what is it? Sonic: We have to carve out dalgona candy. Knuckles: Dalgona what? Red Soldier: Now please pick a dalgona candy. Mario: Okie-dokie, here we go. Red Soldier: The next game you will be playing is honey comb. You have to carve out the shape, perfectly out of the candy in order to succeed in this round, if your candy cracks or breaks, You will be eliminated. You have 5 minutes to begin. Sonic: Wait, shouldn't we have needles or somethi- Knuckles, Wait there's only five. Red Soldier: You can take the last one on the other plate. Knuckles: You gotta be kidding me. Sonic: (breaks a piece of the candy and pants 2 times) Oh thank god. Tails: (gasps) (Tails gets scared). Tails: Oh my god, wait no, wait no stop! NO IT WAS AN ACCIDENT PLEASE- (Tails gets shot). Voice Monitor: Tails has been eliminated. Sonic: Tails, nooooooooo! Ohhhhh my god! (crack) Sonic: Nooooooo Knuckles! Knuckles: Wait...please. (Knuckles screams and gets shot). Voice Monitor: Knuckles has been eliminated. (Sonic cries). Sonic: Why? Why? Why? Why couldn't it be me? Mario: Ha! I did it. Silver: (sighs) I did it. Shadow: (sighs) I did it. Shadow: Sonic? Sonic: (sniffs and sighs) I did it. (Beethoven's Für Elise plays in the background). Sonic: (sniffs 2 times). Mario: Oh I am definitely going to win this game for sure, this is too easy! Red Soldier: Congratulations for making it to the third round. Please proceed by going to the living room for the next game. Sonic: (sighs) At this point, I don't deserve to survive. Sonic: Oh what is this? Silver: I think we're doing tug of war. Sonic: Tug of War? Red Soldier: Mario and Silver please move forward. The next game you'll be playing, is called Tug of War, you have to use your strength by holding the rope and hope that your partner falls down, in the middle of the sofa handle, and whoever does shall be eliminated. Begin! (a gunshot goes off in the air). (Mario and Silver try pulling the rope to their sides). Mario: You can do this Mario, you can do this. It's-a-me, Mario I'm strong I can do this! (Mario uses his strength to pull the rope onto his side and falls onto the floor). Silver: Ahh! Mario: Oooo! Ouch! Silver: Oh no, oh no, oh no. Ohhhhh my god- Silver: Oh it's no use begging for mercy- (Silver gets shot). Voice Monitor: Silver has been eliminated. Red Soldier: Sonic and Shadow, it's your turn. Shadow: (sighs) Sonic as much as I dislike you, I do wish you the best with this game. Sonic: (sighs) You too Shadow. (a gunshot goes off in the air). (Sonic and Shadow try pulling the rope to their sides). (pants 2 times) Shadow: Oh my god. Maria. I'll be seeing you very soon. (Shadow gets shot). Voice Monitor: Shadow has been eliminated. Sonic: (sighs). Mario: Sonic. Sonic: What do you want?! Mario: Oh I just want to wish you the very best Of you losing. Sonic: Do we even need the money at this point? Mario: Yes Sonic! Yes! Sonic: Wha, why? I mean, what was the point of doing this, if your loved ones are dead. Why?! Mario: Because I need it for Nintendo, I need it for my brand. Okay, I need it after the dramatic loss of paying celebrities, for my own movie! I am not going to let this, be for nothing. So you are going to do this final game with me, whether you like it! OR NOT! Red Soldier: Congratulations Mario and Sonic, for making it to the final game. Now. Please, proceed back to the kitchen. To continue The finale To this competition. Mario: I wonder if the final game will be big or not. Sonic: Okay Sonic so whatever the last one is. Do it, for those that lost their lives. Red Soldier, Now, the final game, is a game of luck. Whoever has the most marbles, will win the competition, and gets the cash prize. But whoever doesn't. Will know what's coming to them. Mario: Whoever has the most marbles, that's not fair! Mario: (talks to himself) Whoever has the most marbles. (sighs) But okie-dokie, whatever you say. Sonic: Oh my god. There's a 50% chance of me winning this. Red Soldier: The marbles are in those tiny bags. Pour them in your own bowls and count how many you have if you have 10 you win the game, but if you have less than 10. Game over. Mario and Sonic: Here we go. (An old hide and seek song plays in the background) Mario: Oh please, please I need it, I need to win. Mario: Oh god just open. Mario: (gasps 3 times) (Mario shakes) (Sonic laughs uncontrollably). (Mario shakes). (Sonic shakes uncontrollably as he reveals to the camera how many marbles he has). Mario: Noooooooo! (Mario grabs a knife from a kitchen draw). Mario: No! I did everything right! I played by the rules! And I deserve a second chance! (Mario gets shot and falls down on the floor). Voice Monitor: Mario lost the final game. (Sonic laughs uncontrollably). (Sonic snort laughs). Red Soldier: Well. Congratulations Sonic the Hedgehog. You officially won, the Squid Game competition. And because of that. You win. Nothing. Sonic: What? Red Soldier: You win. Absolutely Nothing! Sonic: So, I did all of this. For god damn nothing! Red Soldier: Correct. Sonic: Why I'd outta kill you- (3 claps) What? Dr. Robotnik: Oh silly hedgehog! Did you really think you would get 45 million dollars out of playing those games? Sonic: Robotnik. You did all of this? Why? Dr. Robotnik: Oh I did all of this, because you destroyed all of my plans to kill you, the stupid tiny animals, and, your stupid piles of crap, that you, "apparently call friends." I even had to rebuild Metal Sonic! After you poured water on him! And that took forever to fix! In fact! He was even the soldier guiding you throughout the whole thing! So how do you feel? Knowing you will get nothing? I bet it doesn't feel good doesn't it? Sonic: No. Dr. Robotnik: That's what I thought. (Dr. Robotnik gets shot). Sonic: Wha! (an unknown figure shoots the Red Soldier, a.k.a Metal Sonic, and gets electrocuted). Sonic: Wwwwwwwha. (gasp). Shadow: Take that you fat revolting piece of crap! Sonic: Shadow. You're still alive. Shadow: Ughhh, I am faker. Sonic: But...how? Shadow: (coughs) I couldn't let this last piece of energy in me, to just go away without telling you something. Sonic: Well what is it? Shadow: (coughs 3 more times) Take, these 2 chaos emeralds, and say chaos control, in order to go back in time, and prevent yourself and others, from playing the game. Sonic: (sniff) Let me take you. Shadow: No it has to be you! You started this. You end this. Sonic: Okay. Thank you Shadow. (sighs). Please work, please work, please. (sighs). CHAOS CONTROL! (gasps). Oh my god. I'm back to where we were in the first place. And now! I have to stop this! (doorbell) Who's at the door? Oh Silver you have the door, who was it? Silver: Ummm, I don't know but there's this weird card that's made out of cardboard. (Sonic gasps). Silver: Ah! Sonic: Silver! You have to get rid of that card immediately, or else we'll be doomed! You, me and everyone else, will all die if we even think about doing the game, so please, flush the card down the toilet, burn it, rip it, jus- literally anything! But just make sure that whatever you do. YOU DO NOT PLAY SQUID GAME! Silver: What are you even talking about? Sonic: Well..... I just... Came from the future and ummm.......... It's a long story. (harmonious end music). No I mean like a really, really long story I mean to the point where it would make for a really good Netflix show. Silver: Or make a poor man rich! Sonic: Yeah. (end music continues) Dr. Robotnik: Ohhhhhh, god! DAMMIT! He knows my secret plan! Sonic: I see you! Dr. Robotnik: (in a child's voice) Oh Crap! Sonic: Get back here Egghead I'm gonna get you for this! Silver: What just happened? (music ends) Thanks for Watching! Captions by SonicWhacker55
