<i> This is</i> Couples Court
with the Cutlers. [Judge Keith] This is the case
of Dobbins vs Aguilar. You all have been together
for two years, you're dating, and Ms. Agular has moved out
two weeks ago. Whether she moves back... will depend on what happens
here today. Mr. Dobbins, you opened
this case, tell us why. Your Honor, I'm here today
because I believe my girlfriend has been cheating
on me. When I went to work as a model
in Singapore, I was gone for three months. During the duration
of those three months, the phone calls got less
and less and less so, by the last month, -I didn't hear from her.
-It was your fault. -You didn't call me.
-I didn't hear from her. And then, when I got back, like, she was like
a different person, completely different person.
She was cold, she was distant. -So were you.
-We didn't have sex. Like before, we had really fun,
romantic-- She was an insatiable
little sex monkey, you know. -[all laugh]
-She was so passionate... -I'm not your sex monkey.
-...romantic. We used to do it -in the laundry room--
-Wait, wait, wait. Did you say she was
an insatiable sex monkey? Yes, Your Honor.
She would-- We-- We-- We had long, passionate,
romantic sessions. And now? Now,
she's like a nun. We-- I-- I get it, like, every--
I-- I get it every two-- Why would I be with someone
that is accusing me -all the time? No.
-She-- She's just saying that. She's just saying that
because she has somebody else. Well, you know, when I hear
sex monkey, all I think of is
chandelier swinging. So, I-- You took me
to a whole 'nother place. But, Ms. Aguilar, you said, "Look, why do I wanna have sex
with you if you're accusing me?" -Is that what I heard you say?
-Yes. All right, tell me
what's going on on your planet? Why is he saying that
you've gone from sex monkey-- Insatiable sex monkey to nun
and that's-- -Those are pretty good extremes.
-Okay so, Your Honor, after he came back
from the trip, he's been accusing me
all the time because he found some underwear,
underwear behind the bed. So, from that point
he's been accusing me and accusing me
and he will text me and call me, "Who are you with,"
and he's just like a stalker, -it's annoying.
-But, Ms. Aguilar, you said you're mad. You're mad
about being accused of cheating. Mm-hmm, he doesn't have
any proof, so-- But are you cheating? -You don't have to have proof.
-[Gipsy] I'm not. -[Judge Dana] Okay.
-[Jesus] Your Honor-- Your Honor, I do have proof.
I do have proof. All right, tell me
about this proof. When I got back from Singapore,
and I felt very distant from her so I decided
to invite her to our favorite night club
to, you know, get the ball rolling again,
get the romance back, you know. So, we went to the night club
and the first thing I-- I see is that there're a lot of guys
eyeing her, you know, 'cause look at her,
she's stunning. Well, you gotta be used
to that, right? -Yeah.
-[Jesus] Right, of course. What I'm not
used to is that she was eyeing them back
and being all flirtatious. -[Judge Keith] Okay.
-[Judge Dana] Okay. And so, is that all that happened is
she was kinda being flirty? She-- No. She was being flirty,
then we sat down on the table, you know,
we waited for our drinks but they were taking forever. So, she goes and she says,
"You know what? I'm gonna go get us some drinks,
I'll be right back." -[Judge Keith] Okay.
-[Judge Dana] Okay. I'm like, okay. Cool.
Ten minutes later... nothing. Another ten minutes later
so now we're like, at the 20-- 20 minutes mark... nothing. And I--
I start to get worried. I'm like, what happened,
is she okay? Where is she, you know?
So, I wait another maybe like, twenty minutes, so now,
we're at the 45 mark and she comes back
with no drinks. And I'm like, why are you--
Why did it take you so long -and then, you have no drinks.
-[Judge Dana] Right. And then, I noticed that
her dress zipper was undone. Her hair was all messed up,
her lipstick was smeared. -My God.
-And she smelled like cologne, -men's cologne and sex.
-[Judge Keith] Okay. -[all gasp]
-You're being so dramatic, -Jesus. Seriously.
-[Judge Dana] Okay, -wait a minute.
-[Gipsy] No, let me tell you -what happened.
-Okay. I decided to go
to get some drinks then the line was really long
so I had to go to the bathroom to do my necessities, whatever. And the stall, it didn't have
like a hanger to put my purse. So, I put in on the floor. When I was done,
I bent to get my purse and my zipper like, popped. -[Judge Dana] Oh!
-No, then, I took it off and I was literally naked
and I was in the bathroom trying to fix it. After that, I felt like,
I couldn't do anything. So, I got out
and there was this lady, um, selling a perfume, deodorant
to, like refresh yourself and I used it that.
When I got out, he starts, like, tripping around
and saying that I smell like sex and my lipstick was smeared
when it was dark, he didn't see anything. Okay so, you're saying
everything that he was looking at
was not because you were having sex
with somebody but because you broke
your zipper on your dress. -[Gipsy] Mm-hmm.
-But, you're saying, mmm-- I don't-- I don't believe that. For 45 minutes? I mean, what?
Was she gonna sew the zipper-- [Gipsy] There's a lot
of security in the night club. Come on, it's a night club,
it's dark, you know, -people are there.
-If I'm an insatiable little monkey,
how come 45 minutes -is gonna be enough for me?
-[all laugh] -[Jesus] 'Cause I was with you.
-[audience cheering] -Your Honor--
-[Judge Dana] No, wait, wait. She got a point there,
Mr. Cutler. She-- Forty-five minutes
ain't gonna be enough -for a sex monkey.
-Maybe 45... [Gipsy speaking in Spanish] Maybe 45 minutes is just enough
to kind of, get her home, -I mean, you know?
-Oh, my God! -Not just get her home.
-Yeah. Well, 'cause now we're down
to 15-minute quickies. So, you know, that's triple. -[Judge Dana laughs]
-[Judge Keith] You said-- You said two things that struck
my interest and, you know, I have not spent a lot of time
in women's bathrooms, thank you. But from what I've read,
from what I've heard from my women friends. -Thank you.
-Right. I mean, women do almost anything
to keep from putting their purse on the bathroom floor. I mean,
they'll tie it, they'll hold it. They'll tie it on something.
They'll do anything to keep it from being
on the bathroom floor. Especially
a club bathroom floor. At a club bathroom floor.
And then, you were completely naked
in the women's bathroom? [audience laughs] -I also have other proof. Um...
-Okay. Tell us about your other proof
that she is cheating. [Jesus] She's cheating. When I got home one day,
I was looking for my charger. -[Judge Dana] Okay.
-And I was searching underneath the bed. You know, it was dark
and I actually found, um-- Let me see here.
I found something that I thought-- I thought
was a wrinkled-up t-shirt. -[Judge Dana] Okay.
-But then, when I further examined it,
it wasn't a wrinkled-up t-shirt. Can I present this to your... -Ron, would you get that?
-Ron, would you grab that -for us, please?
-[audience laughs] -Ron is like, what is that?
-What is it? -What is that?
-What is that? [indistinct chatter] -Oh!
-It's so gross. It's some underwear. Okay,
are these previously worn? [Gipsy] Your Honor,
those are new. -Oh, okay.
-[Jesus] Your Honor-- [Judge Dana] That makes me feel
a little better. You Honor,
she knows for a fact that... I don't like underwear,
I'm a free spirit. -[Judge Dana] Yeah.
-So I don't use any underwear. -[Gipsy] Your Honor--
-And if I was to wear underwear, I wouldn't wear
those granny panties. [audience laughing, applauding] -Are these for men?
-[Gipsy] Your Honor, he said free spirit, but he has
a full drawer of underwear 'cause he's a model. And he orders his stuff online
all the time and whatever he doesn't like,
he throws it and I-- And this is me
going back, -picking up everything.
-What was I gonna do? -Model for a diapers commercial?
-I don't know. [Judge Keith] So, Mr. Dobbins... -Depends on the topic.
-[Judge Dana] Hold on, hold on. I've heard the phrase
granny panties. I'm not sure I've heard that
apply to men's briefs before. But they look like
granny panties. [Judge Dana] That's what
I thought, they were for women. -I thought it was her underwear.
-[Judge Dana] But I guess, this part makes it manly. -Oh, I don't know.
-[Judge Keith] You found these and you believe
that they're from some man that she's been with
in your house? Yes, correct
'cause those are used, they're not clean,
they're not mine, they're-- You know, frankly, I'm like,
what-- what are these doing -underneath my bed?
-Ms. Aguilar, okay, he says, they're not clean,
they're not his. They're clean. You can see
those are new. And you don't know anything
about it? He has a full drawer
of underwear even though free soul, spirit,
whatever he wanna call it. So, Mr. Dobbins, what type
of underwear do you wear? I usually don't wear
any underwear 'cause I look good naked. -[Judge Dana laughs]
-Okay, all right. So, commando in court,
there you got it, folks. -The bottom line is, I mean--
-Uh, uh, bottom. Get it? -You like that?
-[all laugh] The bottom line is,
they're not his according to him. So, that brings us back
to the question, Ms. Aguilar, whose are they? And how did they
get in your bedroom -under your bed?
-I've never seen those in my life,
I told you that when he doesn't like anything,
he throws it, and then, I come after
and pick everything up 'cause he's really messy. Your Honor,
I have further proof. I was gonna ask you. Is there
anything else for support? [Jesus] Yes, Your Honor,
I have further proof. -Okay.
-She's been coming home -extremely late from work.
-[Judge Dana] Okay. And I've noticed
this repetitive pattern because before she used to come
on time. Now, she's coming late,
later, later, later and later. -[Judge Dana] Okay.
-[Jesus] So, I went to her work and I was waiting for her,
you know, because I wanted -to see...
-You're so creepy. [Jesus] ...there's something
going on here. So, as soon as she got out
of work, she-- Instead of going to her car
and going back home, no. She jumps in this stranger's car
with another man. -And--
-[audience gasps] [Jesus] Yeah, I know.
That was my reaction. So, I went back home.
She comes in... super drunk, stumbling around,
you know, and I was-- You were sleeping,
so how will you know? No, no. I was pretending
to sleep. I was pretending to sleep. -You're so creepy.
-She woke me up. -No, no, no.
-[Judge Dana laughs] You know what they say,
Ms. Aguilar, -every shut eyes isn't asleep.
-Yeah. So yeah, he could be faking it,
go ahead. Yeah, so she was sleeping,
I woke up super early and I went through her purse. [speaking in Spanish]
Why would you do that? [Jesus] No, no, no,
I went through her purse because I wanted to see
if there was anything, and guess what I found?
I found... a plethora of flavored condoms. -And to me--
-[audience gasps] -To me--
-[audience laughs] [Jesus] No, first of all,
and this is really strange. -Flavored condoms?
-[Jesus] Flavored condoms. -A plethora.
-Not just a condom. [Jesus] There were many,
there were a lot of condoms. You're being dramatic,
there was only ten. -[Jesus] No, listen--
-[Judge Dana] Only ten! -[Judge Keith] Only ten?
-[audience laughs] -Oh, okay. Well.
-Oh, well, no. -That's not a plethora.
-Yeah. --No, Your Honor...
-Do you all use condoms? ...Your Honor, this is--
this is the crazy part is that she's on the pill and I don't use condoms
because I'm organic and-- -[audience laughing]
-Okay. I'm organic so why does she have
a bunch of them in her purse? -Ten condoms?
-Ten flavored condoms. Tell me about why you had
ten flavored condoms? So, I got off work that day
and my friend, he picked me up. The thing is
that he didn't saw-- He didn't see the guy
that picked me up. From there we went
to a friend's bachelorette party and they were giving out like,
weird things. Condoms and-- So, I saw those
I was like, let me try this out 'cause our relationship,
it's like, dead. But if he's organic, I mean,
he's not gonna use them. But it's something new.
I had like flavor and colors. [Jesus] But listen,
Your Honor-- Wait, wait, wait.
Wait, wait, wait. And you can't resist someone
who can say flavors and colors, you know, who can resist that? I'm okay with it. You go ahead
and get your ten condoms. Your-- Your Honor, but I mean,
honestly? Condoms? Like, I was expecting, like,
handcuffs or a swing, -or rope, you know.
-Yeah, if he wants to spice it up,
let's spice it up. Just grabbing a handful
of condoms off the table. That's not spicing it up.
That's why you think -she was with some other man?
-You're correct, yes. So, but what you're saying is,
I'm sure that's she grabbed these ten condoms, who is she
using the condoms with? She definitely won't use it
with me, for sure. -Oh, well.
-[Judge Dana sighs] Oh, boy. [Judge Keith] All right, I think
we've heard enough testimony. So, at this time, the court
has done a complete and full investigation.
At this time, the court would like to call
former military interrogator, Lena Sisco to determine
is she cheating. -Ron, would you escort her in?
-[audience cheers] [indistinct chatter] For the benefit of our litigant,
would you please state -your credentials?
-[Lena] Yes, Your Honor. I'm a former
military interrogator. I was certified
by the Department of Defense and shortly after 9/11,
I was deployed to Guantanamo Bay, Cuba where I interrogated members
of Al Qaeda and Taliban. So, you conducted
a full interrogation? -[Lena] Yes, Your Honor.
-As a result of that, what did you learn
about the red briefs that Mr. Dobbins found
in their bedroom. So, when I asked Ms. Aguilar
about those red briefs, her first initial response
was to laugh and say, -he's so weird.
-[Judge Dana laughs] So, she went on to tell me
he receives underwear because of his modelling career
and if he doesn't like them, he tosses them around the room
and she's gotta pick up after him.
So, when I was watching her as I was asking her
these questions, she spoke to me with open palms
so that's indicative of truthfulness and honesty.
She had really good eye contact with me and she showed no signs
of anxiety or stress while she was talking to me. In your interrogation,
what did Ms. Aguilar reveal about the man that Mr. Dobbins
saw her getting in the car with? So, I asked her specifically,
did you have sex with this person
that picked you up, your friend and this is her response
and I'm gonna read it. She said, "I wonder
what his boyfriend would think of that question." So, she went on to give me
the full details of that night. What happened
and there were too many details in that story
for it to be a lie. [Judge Keith] What did
your investigation determine about the night at the club
and her zipper was undone on her dress? She initially told me
that Mr. Dobbins was being a party pooper and so,
she went to the bar to socialize and get some drinks
but the line was long and she went to the ladies' room
and she told me how she put her purse on the floor
and when she bent over, she ripped her dress. So, as she was describing
this night, she was acting it out
so that told me it came from episodic memory
which is a memory of what we've done
which is very indicative of truthfulness. So, as a result
of all of your interrogation of Ms. Aguilar,
what did you conclude? [Lena] I conclude
that Ms. Aguilar... is not cheating on Mr. Dobbins
and that she is being faithful. -Thank you.
-[audience applaud, cheer] You need to apologize,
get on your knees -'cause I'm not moving back.
-Babe, I'm so sorry. -[Gipsy sobs] No.
-I had no idea, babe. -I'm sorry.
-Oh, my God. -I'm sorry for doubting you.
-[Judge Dana] Y'all are cute. -I'll figure it out, shut up.
-[Judge Dana] Y'all are so cute. Okay, so let me--
let me talk to Mr. Dobbins. Here's the thing,
sex starts up here. And if she's turned off up here
because you're accusing her and nagging her. It's no way
it's gonna go anywhere else. It stops right here.
Now, if you're being a... romantic and you're treating
her well and your relationship
is back on its feet, you're gonna be surprised,
she's gonna be that sex monkey. What was it?
"Insatiable sex monkey" -you talked about...
-[Jesus] Correct. ...swinging
from the chandeliers. So, you need to work
on making her feel like a woman. And Ms. Aguilar,
you gotta allow him to do that. He's gonna make the effort.
You can't just put up the hand like, I'm not feeling
that right now. You gotta allow him
to make it up to you... -Okay, I will.
-[Judge Keith]
...for accusing you. [Judge Dana] And there has to be
forgiveness on both sides. So you all can go
forward happily. Y'all are so cute,
you all need to be together. -You all need to work that out.
-Thank you, Your Honor. As we say in this court room,
"Do not cheat yourself out of an opportunity
to have a happy, healthy, insatiable sex monkey
filled relationship." -Court is adjourned.
-[audience applaud, cheer] [dramatic music plays]
