r/ProRevenge - 5000 Flowers

here's some backstory I have a four-year-old cocker spaniel named Charlie and he likes to poop I let him out in my front garden every morning for his toilet routine same in the evening we don't have a boundary fence on where my garden and my neighbor's starts besides the row of bushes saying this Charlie hasn't ever crossed slash pooped past these bushes now every week I collect up said poop before it gets into a disturbing amount I've been doing this for the past four years to keep my front garden looking good and not smelly one day I came home from work to find that my neighbors weren't happy that there was dog poop in my front garden I instantly went to collect up what was there there wasn't much and it was nowhere near the boundary of where our gardens met fast forward a week my neighbor again complained about the dog poop being in my garden however this time threatened to hurt my dog if he continued to poop in my garden this time I wasn't so nice about it and stated that it's my garden and my dog can do as he pleases now I know dog poop can be annoying but when it's not in your garden and there's no smell due to decent airflow and open front garden is it really justified to threatening a man's dog over some poop anyway after months of this going with petty things and shade beans thrown at me every day about having a dog I decided to declare war on my neighbor's now I knew these people pretty well they just moved him and we let them use our with you for a couple of months until they got this sorted I picked up a few things about them and one of them was I OCD they were they cut their back garden every week and painted the entire bottom layer of the house to match their fence this was all the fuel I needed to exact my revenge my first step was to start off small I knew they liked things to match so I painted my fence gate bright pink instead of matching it with my friends this was my first small victory they hated it so much they begged me to correct the color so I did I figured if peace was an option it was worthwhile then began the hate again I had to come up with something so evil and yet genius that couldn't be traced back to me this is when I planted over 5,000 dandelion seeds in their front back garden I figured I was in this for the long game I did this under the cover of night and made shorter plant them in place is not easily mowed fast forward three months and their garden was covered in weeds they grew through all the slobbing and were patched all over the garden it took them over three days to clear the weeds and around 100 of weed killer long story short asshole neighbor's threatens to hurt my dog oh I plant 5,000 weeds in their garden higher edit this is a long story and I hope you can bear with me when I was in seventh grade I moved to a new town my father was killed in a military accident and my mom wanted to start fresh in a new place we came from a small town and our new apartment was in a huge city my mom grieve my dad for over two years but after that got back into dating and eventually married my now step dirt with him she is still happily married he's always treated us well and I love and respects him they have their own daughter together my half-sister I didn't adjust very well I was active and happy in my old town but in my new town I was depressed and ilona I entered school in the middle of the year when all the friend groups were already formed I missed my dad a lot so just stayed home and ate and played video games I got fat never obese that I was chunky and out of shape compared to how I used to be I like this one girl who was in a few of my classes I'll call her Lin Tsai Lin Tsai was pretty and popular and she was the first girl I really had a crush on being shy I never tried to talk to her as time went on I made what I thought who were friends with these two boys who I will call Alan and Joey all of us including Lin Tsai were in the seventh grade I didn't hang out with Alan and July outside of school but they'd let me hang out with them on campus at least I didn't have to sit alone anymore Alan and Joey were talking about which girls were cute and who they had a crush on I eventually admitted that I liked Lin Tsai but told them not to tell her later that day in math class which I shared with Lin Tsai a note was passed to me it was from Lin Tsai my heart left although I was nervous did Alan and Joe I tell her I likes her when I opened the note my heart fell to my feet I get red when I'm nervous or sad I was never more it than that day inside the note lincei had written in block capital letters I don't like you pop there was a little bit of giggling in the room I was so embarrassed I asked the teacher if I could go to the nurse there was loud laughter as I left the nurse let me stay in her office until the end of the day which was good since my mom couldn't leave work unless I was dying and I wasn't allowed at that point to walk home the 3/4 mile to our apartment due to a recent spate of kidnapping stories in the news I took the school bus home as usual kids laughed at me on the bus too not two days later I get called into the principal's office and get lectured by the principal how a student complained that I was stalking her I of course had no idea what happened but eventually I figured out that Alan and Joe I told lincei and Lynch they decided to make a big production about getting me into trouble soon everyone on campus started to call me the creepy stalker the hillbilly the white trash redneck things like that lincei got all sorts of positive attention for being brave enough to tell adults about kids who harassed her thing was I was never officially reprimanded and my mom was never actually called in to talk to any adults about what I supposedly did the principal just told me that stalking was bad and to leave lincei alone I didn't really know what more I could do to leave her alone I never even said one thing to her or tried to send any notes to her or stare at her all I did was tell someone I thought was a friend that I liked her and please don't tell her I didn't tell my mom about it but after Alan and Joe Lee's betrayal it was back to sitting by myself in eighth grade I still went to the same school and it was more of the same I was still known as the uneducated redneck creeper lincei was still really popular and went out with the cool guys from our class Alan and Joe I were never in the cool kid group and I suspect that they both liked lincei too and were trying to suck up to her on Valentine's Day I got one of those candy grams that students sent to one another that they buy from student leadership at their school during holidays like two dollars will get you a card and a candy bar and a student aid will deliver it to the intended recipient along with a sealed message I at least got a candy bar out of it the message wasn't so nice it said stop stalking me free thanks Lin say bye high school I really hit my growth spurt and eventually grew to be six feet five I eventually got quite skinny so I began pumping a lot of I'm starting in tenth grade I became really ripped Allen grew up to be a B asterisk TCH while little runt and he never messed with me again especially after Allen the one who asked me who I had a crush on in seventh grade was whispering something to someone in a class we had together in 11th grade and looking at me and laughing I said really loud yo Allen knew little you have something to say you say to my face like a man don't go whispering like a little everyone laughed and even the teacher didn't call me out or sent me to the office I think she was sick of the little punk too I didn't really care to date in high school because even though I was big and strong now I was still awkward around girls Jo I actually came around though in 11th grade he approached me and apologized for how he treated me in middle school he said that Allen was the one who told Lin say that I liked her he told me that Allen had a crush on Lin Tsai too and was trying to score points with her I thanked him and although we were never really friends after that in school I wasn't mean to him and he wasn't mean to me we were fist bump acquaintances Lin Tsai was still really popular in high school not quite as popular as in middle school because in high school there was more hot girl competition but she still held her own I didn't black for attention from other girls but more often than not the girl would tell me that Lin Tsai told them I was a stalker and harassed her in middle school lots of girl accused me of that in high school especially the ones I rejected eventually since I was rejecting a lot of girls some of whom were in the popular group and lincei was still in the cool kid group at this time people spread rumors saying I was homosexual I don't happen to be gay nothing wrong with being gay but the way these people were throwing it around It was as if the in Gale is an insult really disappointing considering this was a huge progressive City I might have thought such attitudes were common in my old hometown but it was surprising here I'd sometimes find notes in my locker calling me homophobic expletive of course no one especially any guys would own up to it because by this time I was huge not just in height but I was also really jacked side note about that I asked the custodian a really chill dude especially if you slip him a 20 if I could look at the surveillance videos of the halls that he had on his office computer it actually pinpointed who was putting notes in my locker it wasn't Alan I would have loved if it was Alan because I would cave his face in it was actually the Swann ape gang danger who walked around in sunglasses and baggy pants and flannel shirts buttoned to the top looked like a total tool bag so I caught him in the parking lot one day with his girlfriend and said he forgot something then I showed him six or seven notes that he had put in my locker he tried to act like Lee didn't know what I was talking about but I slapped him in front of his girlfriend and said next time I find a note in my locker I'm going to make you look like a week in front of the whole school not just your I never got a note from him after that but before he drove off like a deflated white charlo balloon he admitted that lincei and her crew were behind it nowadays and especially if my kid were the victim I'd want him or her to tell an adult but back then I had this snitches get stitches mentality and decided to just suck it up right around this time social media was really starting to take off especially that website where you had your own personal space and could have a top five friend ro can use htlm to switch out music and have personalized wallpaper looking back I think I prefer this space of mind to that boring book of faces most of my own friends were older than me and from all over the place I liked having online friends because at least you could delete them just like that if you decided they suck unlike high school where people you've mentally cancelled were still on campus every day Joe I was my online friend still is and he pointed me to a page he found on that website it was a bogus one that had stolen pictures from my real account and was using my whole name it was full of hateful homophobic slurs and accusing me of being a stalker by tracing this fake profiles friends I could tell it had originated from the lincei group I flagged the account and it was soon taken down to this day I don't get why lincei found it so necessary to hate me so much that she had to try to ruin my middle and high school years just because I happen to like her a little bit in seventh grade anyway in high school I wasn't a loner anymore I was on the basketball team and track team and swim team so I had friends but I was never in the very top tier popularity group lincei was in that top group though she was mostly one of the hangers on ER the most popular girls in school like she was in that group but was never bent and though I had my share of fun with girls in high school never dated just hooked up I could never shake the reputation that I had stalked lincei well I graduated and moved on I went to college for accounting and eventually became a CPA I still work out every day and so I stayed in really good shape I also continued to play sports in college though I never had the desire or talent really to make it my profession with the help of my awesome stepdad who's an accountant - we opened our own small financial service with a dozen employees we are doing all right eventually a man comes in looking for a job as an accountant lo and behold it's Joe I haven't seen him in years still looks the same maybe a little bolder but otherwise pretty good we catch up and since he's gone to school for accounting himself and has a good resume we hire him he does fine for a couple of years and without chillie become good friends with put the past behind us I went to his wedding he went to mine I went to his son's baptism and he went to my daughter's we are friends on social media and either of us keep in touch with people from middle and high school bygones are bygones and time passes one day July asks me if I got a letter in the mail inviting us to our 10-year high school reunion I tell him now and remember that the school doesn't have any of my updated addresses since my mom and stepdad moved a couple of times since I graduated and anyway I don't live with them anymore July is taking care of his sick mother so his wife and child moved in with his mom and his childhood home he shows me the letter typical staff except hey now Lynde says on the reunion committee it has her ml address and everything I haven't thought about her in years since I'm in front of my computer I look up her email address on face libero and it leads right to her since her privacy settings are minimal her current photos don't do her any favors she's aging badly it looks like she had a couple of kids and was married once but is now a single mom and sharing custody with her ex-husband she gained a lot of weight and doesn't look like she used to really I wonder if it's even her but the name matches up and the school history matches up I was thinking how long it would be if their ex-husband was Alan but it wasn't Alan was on her friends list though clicking on him it doesn't look like he amounted to anything never attended college but that's okay if he does other productive things but he doesn't it seems he washed out of the Army and has worked a series of menial jobs and now lives in another state far away seems like he's obsessed with just smoking weed and trying to date teenagers these days Helen say from her updates it looks like she is big on the dating scene but hasn't found mr. right and it's frustrating her because she has so much to offer like her crushing student debt that she complains about in one post for her super cool and usefulness degree in fashion design that she never quite earned because she fell in love and got married with some loser from high school or how their children don't respect her in another post or how she has several gaudium funds just to raise the rent on her crap studio apartment or her amazing exciting career as a junior shift supervisor at that popular coffee shop galactic barks holy cow I think life got my revenge on her for me but I think this B asterisk TCH needs a little nudge I tell Jo I know I'm not going to the reunion are you he says he will because he wants to see if any of his favorite teachers are still around and he tells me don't you want to show off to people how successful you are now lo al we are boring accountants not navy seals or hedge offenders over here so I tell him now but if you're going say hi to people for me we'll do the reunion is still a couple of months away for what I'm going to do I need my wife's permission after I explain how lincei treated me in middle and high school about all the stalker and anti-gay stuff my wife tells me mid breast feed to destroy with prejudice and in detail thanks dear I look completely different in the face compared to high school still I don't want to use my own photos so instead I gather lots of stock photos of a particular male model sorry dude I hope you don't mind anyway I'm sure lots of catfish you see was their hook mr. inoffensive conventionally handsome buff German guy and then I make a profile on that awesome dating site acceptable Cupid after Alan on the Libero de face that Lynne saves on there the idiot actually dances her own username she's that thirsty for attention right when I launched my profile I get a few spam emails and desperate cat calls from lonely women I ignore this and go right for the kill I send a message to lincei telling her how amazing and interesting she is since she's such an unattractive person in every way I don't think there's a long line of sweet as vying for her attention and I'm right within minutes I get a reply we begin a message exchange on the site and I gradually gain her confidence mostly by flattering her she doesn't tell me she's a mom even after several days of messaging which is odd she implies strongly that she's a career person and artist either okay relax air Lin say eventually I share a pic with her and she fawns over how gorgeous I am thanks innocent German model I'm glad she can't hear me laughing when I type that she is beautiful as days pass she begs me to give her permission to share my photos to her book of the face where she is bragging about me I tell her that there is a time for that soon she can share my pic and I will share her all all her into thinking I'm respectful and want to take time in figuring out us throughout this whole time I keep giving her opportunities to tell me she's a mom I get her to say that for the right guy I'll make my existence only about him and me everything else is second place I also get her to say that she can't stand kids this is already a long story so I'll try to at least shorten it a little here eventually she invites me to her high school reunion I tell her how much I'd love to go but that I live in another state and can't get time off from my highly paid executive job law until a date a few days after but I promised her that we will have a date at a very expensive restaurant she's bragging all over her social media that she has a new hot guy online and has a date with him of course her friends are begging her to share his pics but she doesn't to her credit she does brag about how this will teach her ex Alessa that she can still pull the hottest dudes everyone online in her friend group I was not shocked to see that most of her friends were other losers from school and how she never seemed to grow up was cheer learning her telling her how much she deserved this you sure do Lin say I don't tell Joey what I'm doing a few desks away from him at work every spare moment I have from my job I devote to messing with Lin Tsai sending her messages about how beautiful she is how I will take her on trips eventually I learn her I hit the convenience store let's call it 711 and buy a cheap cell phone with minutes card I begin texting lint say about how I think she's so amazing refreshing so we know just to see if she's still a hateful B word I tell her about how during my online dating sometimes guys will try to chat with me she immediately laments how backslash homophobic expletives backslash need to stay away from straights okay Lin say you're trash I text her back that I don't mind when guys message me because I have my acceptable Cupid account set four friends in addition to romantic partners she immediately backpedals when she sees that gay guys don't offend me whatever Lin say I know what you are anyway ji goes to the reunion with his wife his mother is old but well enough to watch his son for a few hours the high school is about twenty miles from our place of business ji tells me that all the expected people were there he was sad to learn that one of the popular teachers had passed away but most of the others were still working there he saw a lot of the former popular kids he texted me some of their self eyes together too bad Alan didn't make it probably still chasing a statue to recharge in his new home state with few exceptions most of our former classmates looked like they peaked in high school sat considering we're all still under 30 I didn't ask him about her or try to coach him on anything to say but Joe I told me that lint say one of the officers in charge of the reunion committee was bragging to everyone about this hot guy she was messaging online and how she had a date with him according to Joey people were marveling about how unbelievably handsome the guy was like a model I'm glad that Lin Tsai was never the sharpest tool in the shed otherwise a simple reverse image search would reveal that the photos were of a very famous European model Jill I told me that Lin Tsai was bragging about how the guy online was in love with her and how they had a date next week and how he was a rich CEO of some mysterious never named company Jill I told me that a lot of the girls were encouraging Lin Tsai to marry him his money although I appreciated Joey's updates they weren't actually necessary since lincei flooded her book of the face with tons of photos from that night as did her crappy friends eventually I spoke to Lin Tsai on the phone amazing in middle school and high school I never once really talked to her I only told one the asterisks ek the AG in seventh grade that I liked Lin Tsai and after that it was all just gossip and rumors that she started this was the first time I really heard her voice and I wasn't even me I was hair Dutch model she told me how sexy my voice was really Lin Tsai because I was pinching my nose and trying to sound different not that she knew what I sounded like for real anyway I told her I couldn't wait for our date and told her which restaurant it would be I also told her I was staying at a certain five-star hotel I said that we could go there after dinner which is of course polite talk for we will F asterisk CK on date number one I made sure this particular exchange was on the acceptable Cupid site I could tell she was falling hard for me especially the way she plastered her social media with updates on her dream boats hey Lin say you've got two kids and you never post anything about them on social media are you ashamed of your children meanwhile she's telling the world she's going to wear faster risks ek some stranger she's never met Lin say Lin say Lin say a truly trashed human over the following few days she never did own up to having kids but she did admit she worked at spacer bucks coffee as a side thing for fun in addition to all of the apps she said she did and having her own business I assume she's talking about her online store at sweets I that she brags about on the book of mugshots where she sells really crappy beaded jewelry that only drunk ravers might find appealing by this time she's given me her full name and I've given her my made-up name she says that her job at Luna box is a total joke her co-workers are idiots her manager is mentally deficient and that she often takes home pastries at the end of the night supposedly to give to the poor Maplin say I've seen your pics you clearly be eating them scones personally according to Lin Tsai she's supposed to mark out expired pastries and dispose of them for various city code reasons but she goes all SJW with me and tells me that why should all that perfectly good food go to waste it's truly an evil company yeah whatever Lin say you racist elitist homophobe anyway fast forward to our date the restaurant is only a couple of miles from my business and I scheduled our date for shortly after we closed for the evening I said you'll Devery thing in such a way that I wouldn't miss my wife's famous lasagna later for dinner I parked not far from the window in a parking lot adjacent from the restaurant I couldn't park at the restaurant itself as it was an extremely expensive place that had valet parking only how scheduled I Sealand say waddle into the front door coming out of farad oh sure I had instructed her to give her name to the host and be seated at a specific table I happen to know because she said so on the liberal of the face that she was ashamed of her beat-up 2001 Chevy Cavalier I assume she expected her hot date to drive her home after an amazing night of what I can only assume is with her vomit-inducing and malodorous lovemaking I told her I would be arriving in a Maserati I see her sit at the table I arranged earlier I see her playing with her phone probably bragging about our dates to whoever after 20 minutes of stringing her along I see my courier arrive on a red Vespa just as he told me he would the quarry awry scheduled to arrive at a certain time 20 minutes after Lin says arrival he wouldn't bring the item unless I texted the go-ahead which I did he texted me here and I saw him take the bear out of his backpack his task was to ride to a certain gift store I never really frequented and pick up a small stuffed bear whose arms could surround anything from a bouquet of roses to a box of candy to an envelope with a million dollar cheque in it the Coria was then supposed to bring the bear to the restaurant host the host would then of course bring the betel in say the Coria handed the bear to the host I didn't see the handoff because then the restaurant was out of my vision but I did see the Coria right away after I received a text saying gun I did see the host give the better lincei which was the important part I was parked close enough to see her face as she read the note I had typed and placed inside the envelope I had the bear holding next to a fancy chocolate bar I don't like you Lin say her face her face OMG she looked like she was going to die right there I received a WTF text from her I started driving home text after confused text 20 or more she never knows when to drop it finally I pulled into my driveway wife and daughter at home I hear their laughter the good kind I smell the lasagna and my wife kisses me she asks me if I had a good day I tell her yes most definitely and then before I take the phone's battery out and break the cell phone into a hundred pieces before throwing it in the garbage I send Lin say one more text stop stalking me freak the next day I couldn't help it I looked at Lin say social media set to private I'm wondering if her narcissistic ass knew that it was me that played her especially since the mascot for our middle and high schools was a bear that didn't look too different from the stuffed one I had given her I don't really care all I know is that now I have closure especially after I sent the screen captures of our almighty Cupid messages my own username and fake photo blocked out to CPS well in say bragged about hating kids and told me what she thought about being a mom and said she was going to be screwing a strange man on the first day meeting him maybe ex-hubby will get you

Channel: PerStories

Views: 608,780

Rating: 4.8159842 out of 5

Keywords: reddit, r/, rslash, sub, subreddit, best of reddit, reddit top posts, top posts, top posts of all times, funniest posts, funny, comedy, funniest reddit posts, funny reddit posts, funny reddit, fails, cringe, Bumfris, fresh, askreddit, r/askreddit, askreddit stories, askreddit funny, top posts of r/, top posts of all time, askreddit question, best of r/askreddit, best reddit posts, TZ REDDIT, Comment Awards, BrainyDude, toadfilms

Id: OZBgpIEBzy4

Length: 29min 42sec (1782 seconds)

Published: Sat Jul 06 2019