- From Dhalsim to Dalbin,
nerds like a lot of things. But there's some things
they love above all else and that is correcting people. This is Um, Actually. (upbeat music) Joining us today we have Alex Schmidt. - Hello. - [Host] We have Zac Oyama. - Hello. - [Host] And, Haley Mancini. - I'm ready to lose aggressively. - Oh come on now. We don't know if you'll lose aggressively. - All right, I'll lose cowardly. - Good, a nice cowardly loss. That's what we're hoping for. - Great, well you two have been on before. Alex you are new to this game, um, but the rules are very simple. And if you're watching for
the first time at home, this is how it works. These are incorrect statements about the things that you know and love. It's up to you to find what's wrong, buzz in, and correct me. All your corrections must be preceded with the phrase, "Um, actually". You don't say that I
won't give you the point. Um, and you can interrupt me
at any point in the question. Sound good? - Yeah!
- Sounds great. - Great. - Um, we'll just go ahead
and jump right in then. Uh, here's our first statement. In Disney's The Little Mermaid, Ursula the eight tentacled sea witch doesn't just manipulatively
trade for Ariel's voice, but seeks to overthrow the
entire kingdom of Atlantica. However in the original Hans
Christian Andersen story, while the sea witch does trade for the Little Mermaid's voice, she isn't an antagonist and
doesn't appear in the story after the deal is made. (buzzer rings) Yes, Zac. - Um, actually she has
more than eight tentacles. - She does not have more
than eight tentacles. - Mm Kay. (buzzer dings)
(laughs) - Um, actually she has
less than eight tentacles? - That's correct. (cries out)
(laughs) - Yeah! - Why was I so specific? (laughter)
(buzzer dings) - How many tentacles does Ursula have? - I would guess, like, six. - Yeah, she has six. - [Alex] Hey, yeah there we go. - Oh. I bet I know why. - Yeah, I bet you probably do know why. - It's very difficult to do
eight articulating tentacles. - That's correct, yeah. - Yeah, so in animation,
so you'd wanna to do six. - [Host] Yeah she's like, it's
just like this is too hard. - [Zac] Oh I see, yes. - [Host] Yeah, you know you could sort of count her arms perhaps as seven and eight for the full octopus thing. - I guarantee that was discussed. I bet that they were like, "No, the arms will take
care of the eight." - [Host] Yup. - But they'll articulate
differently so it'll be okay. (Alex laughs) - So technically not an octopus body, technically a sextopus body, um. - I feel like you'll never go broke betting that Disney is wrong. Like, you'll never run out of money. - What? Um, actually you definitely will go broke betting Disney is wrong. They have the biggest
lawyers in the world. - Oh no, oh no. (guests laugh) - They're gonna come for us. - They're already here. - Uh, well yeah. That's a point for Alex. Clerics in Dungeons
and Dragons 5th Edition are holy warriors and spellcasters whose powers are fueled by
the deities they worship. There are a wide array of gods
you can worship in D&D 5e, but they're divided into
"Divine Domains" like Grave, Order, Life, Light, Love,
Arcana, and Trickery which have built-in abilities
associated with them. - Uh. (buzzer rings) - [Host] Yes, Zac. - Um, actually love is not a category? - That's correct. Love is not a domain in the 5th edition. At least not one that clerics
can use to draw power from. Uh, which feels like it should be. - I know, it should. - Yeah. - If you look in like any sort of like so many pieces of fiction it's like, "But you know what the greatest power is?" - Yeah.
- Love. - [Host] "Love." - Well you know, Captain
Planet, they would be nothing without heart. - Yeah, exactly.
(guests laugh) - Also I love, I will say, in the 5th edition under
Cleric's by the way, they go into that it's very
important for you to understand the back story of the cleric. They're like, "Were you left as a baby?" (guests laugh) - "Or were you, did you develop this way? "Did you turn away from your parents?" - "Why are you so religious? "Explain yourself."
- Yes (laughs). Like it's very... - Was there just some cool youth pastor and you thought like, "Yeah,
this is the thing for me." - ♪Clerics are just all right with me♪ (guests laugh)
(host humming tune) - And if your a Barbarian or something, "I don't know, I'm just mad.", like, that's all you need. Don't need to hate the goal. - In the episode "Marge Be Not Proud," Bart becomes obsessed with
an ultra-violent video game called Bonestorm, whose slogan is "Buy me Bonestorm or go to Hell!" Unfortunately for Bart, his
family never buys him the game. He visits Milhouse, who
is playing Bonestorm under the name "Thrillhouse," and... (buzzer dings)
- Uh, eh. Um, actually he's under
the name "Thrillho". - That is correct. (laughs) - Thank you.
- 'Cause he ran out of space? - Yeah, he ran out of space.
- Yeah, good speed. I knew that's what it was gonna be too. - You're just like waiting for it. - When you started answering the question I was like, "It's gonna be Thrillho". - It's gonna be about Thrillho. - I would say, fun fact about me, if I would get a tattoo,
it would be "Thrillho". - Really? - [Haley] Yeah. - But you're already committed
to not getting a tattoo, So, you could only dream about-- - I could donate blood at any time. (guests laugh) That's my superpower. - They should let you put down "Thrillho" at the Blood Bank though. - They should, "Thrillho".
- It's really thrilling. - In my own blood. - Sorry, what's your blood type? "Thrillho". "Thrillho" (laughs). - "Thrillho Positive". (guests laugh) What an accurate
representation of that, like, gaming in that era. - Of gaming, oh yeah.
- Where it's just like, "We can't, you only have
this many characters. "You've gotta deal with that." - "Yeah, you're just gonna
have to name it something "that fits in there" - Or like if you ever managed
to get like a high score in an arcade, it's just
rushing to be like, "Oh, I've gotta put
these initials in here." - [Haley] Yep. - And then other times
it just becomes like, "A-A-A-A-A". - [Haley] Yeah.
- Or if your me, you just write Zac. (guests laugh)
(Haley growls) - You piece of ----. (Haley growls)
- Never been a problem in my life. Never been a problem for me. (Alex laughs) - I mean, I feel like
that was, by the way, a choice by them to make it
so hard to put your letters in within the time. You go through this whole
game, you've proven that you deserve to be on the leaderboard. And yet, when it's time
to put your name in, they're like, "Take that." - Well, I'm sure it's
like, "Eh, listen kid, "you've been hogging
this machine from all, "from these idiots who are
gonna be feeding quarters "into it left and right." - Gimme those quarters. - [Host] Yeah, gimme those quarters. - You have four seconds
to write your name. - [Host] Yeah, get the ---- outta here. Let some idiot in. (Zac groans)
(Haley laughs) That's just the new arcade
game, is just write your name. - Write your name as fast as you can. - [Host] High score!
- [Alex] High score! - Most accurate name. (laughs) - You have two seconds to
put your high score name in. Uh, well that question goes to Haley. Our next question is a
fan submitted question, so this is something that
one of the fans sent us in for you to answer. And this one comes to
us from cameron.dexter. Thank you cameron.dexter. 1981 novel "Who Censored
Roger Rabbit" was eventually adapted into the film
"Who Framed Roger Rabbit", but the two plots diverged greatly. In the novel, Detective
Eddie Valiant is trying to hunt down animated cartoon
character Roger Rabbit's killers, but his only clue is the
speech balloon of Roger's last words found at the
scene of his demise. - That all sounds pretty
good to me. (laughs) - It is neat to know that's
from a book, yeah. (laughs) (Haley laughs)
(Host laughs) - I have no idea
(buzzer dings) - Um, actually it doesn't diverge much. - It's exactly the same. - It's the same. - [Host] Uh, no, no, incorrect. - All right, well, you
know, you gotta start it. - Yeah. - Um, actually the book's
title is something, like, much more violent like "Who Killed Roger Rabbit?", or something. - (chuckles) "Who
Annihilated Roger Rabbit, "what happened to his corpse? "Who Desecrated the
Corpse of Roger Rabbit?" - "Who ------ Up Roger Rabbit?" - "Who Defenestrated Roger Rabbit?" - "What the ---- is Wrong
With the Monster Who Mutilated "the Body of Roger Rabbit? "His Family is Waiting for
His Body and We Can't Give It to Him Because the Coroner's Office "Hasn't Released It Yet." - Takes up the whole cover. (laughs) - "When does the story start?" (buzzer dings) - Um, actually, uh
that's not his only clue, 'cause he talks to Roger as a ghost? (group laughs) - Uh, incorrect, no, no. - Felt right. - [Host] Yeah.
- Yeah, yeah. (buzzer dings)
- [Host] Alex? - Um, actually it's not a speech balloon, it's one of those little
thought balloons instead? - Uh, interesting, no, no. - Ah, nuts.
(Haley laughs) I'm just pitching now. I just write it. - That would be a cool story. Um, obviously no one got this one. Uh, the answer I was
looking for here is that in the novel, Roger wasn't animated. He's like a comic strip
character, uh, not a cartoon. Hence, the speech bubble,
uh, which is why, like, in the novel, like, comic
strip characters, like, speak into speech bubbles
and, like, those are, like, things that people can see. So what, like, the clue that's left at the scene of the crime is, like, essentially, like, last
words in physical form, uh, that are there.
- Right. Aw, that is tricky. - That's wild.
- [Host] It is tricky, yes. - That is tricky, you fan. - I do specifically say
"animated cartoon character", but yeah, definitely a semantic difference that is a little tricky. And with that, we will move on to our first shiny question. Shiny questions, like shiny Pokemon, just a little bit
different, little bit rare. Same number of points. (magical tinkling)
(game show interlude) This is a game called Tag Out. So, uh, what we're going to do here, on the other side of your board, uh, you will see a series of movie posters. Uh, and we have removed
the tag lines from them and, sort of, put them on the side. Those you to match the
tag line of the movie with the specific movie poster. In this particular case, these
are all Star Trek movies. - Oh no.
- Oh, ----. (guests laugh) - [Host] So go ahead and flip these over and let's take a look at those movies. (suspenseful music) - Uh, all right, you're
both comparing answers like the bad kids in
the back of the class. - Yep.
(guests laugh) - Oh no. - Um, all right, we'll
go down the line, uh, and I'll reveal at the
end what the answers were and how many each person got. So, Alex, we'll start with you. Tell us, tell us what these tag lines are. - Here we go. So I am almost certain of Insurrection and Undiscovered Country. The rest of 'em, I'm
a little bit guessing. - [Host] Okay. - [Alex] Also some of
them are very insane. - Yeah, Zac. - You know what, here's what I have. - [Host] Okay. - "Why are they putting seat belts "in theaters this summer?" is first. - [Host] Uh-huh. - [Zac] This is the, easily the worst one. So I put it with what
felt like a bad poster. (host laughs)
- [Haley] Uh. - And then everything else was a guess. - So you're not a fan of "Why
are they putting seat belts "in the theaters this summer"? - It's so, I mean, it just... I think it's great, for sure,
but it does feel old as hell. (host laughs) - It also has nothing to do with the ship. It has no seat belts, at all. Uh.
(Haley laughs) They're always falling over.
- [Host] Alex, you need the seat belts,
because it's gonna be such a thrill ride. - That's true. - And Haley, what do you have? - So, lemme walk you guys through this. - [Host] Please. - [Haley] Uh, Nemesis, The
Battle for Paradise Has Begun, saw the green, reminds you of paradise. - [Host] Uh-huh, okay. - And then the last one, Star Trek: The Undiscovered Country,
The Human Adventure is Just the Beginning. - Very well. Well, uh.
(guests laugh) - Very well.
- Very well. - Very well. Well, Haley, I don't think
you got any of those correct. Uh...
(Haley laughs) - Very well. - [Host] Zac, uh, you
got four of these right. - What!
- What! - And then, Alex, uh, you
got two of these right. - Right on.
- [Haley] What? - But, uh, let's go ahead and take a look at the actual answers,
just so you can check me, make sure I didn't miscount one of yours. So, uh, why are they putting seat belts in theaters this summer,
uh, is our first one there. The battle for paradise has begun. A generation's final journey begins. The human adventure is just the beginning. The future begins. And the battle for peace has begun. There's a lot of beginning - [Haley] Oh, yeah. - For uh, generally across
the Star Trek, uh, cannon. (buzzer dings) - Battles.
- [Host] Battles. Things that are final,
things that are beginning. Well, we made a couple of
mistakes and you caught them. Here are some of our favorite
corrections from you. @jordansandfer says, "Trapp
says Thanos should've wished "the universe was 50%
larger to support all life, "but simple math suggests
he must ask to make it 100% larger to double the size." This is correct, I just
flubbed it in the moment. I will give you 50% more points
than usual, or 300 points. And from our exclusive drop
out discord Cappin says, "Um Actually, there are no
female gnomes in Gravity Falls. "This is why the gnomes
are attempting to find "a queen/bride in the episode. "The book entry for gnomes
also only mentions them "as small men if you pause
the show to read it." And you know, I didn't. One point for you. Seerofmind413 says, "Um
actually, Lion Turtles are also "energy benders in addition to "Avatar Aang and Avatar Korra." So sorry for leaving out the Lion Turtles. Great, well, we'll move on
to our next question here. In the series "Godzilla
Island," most of the world's monsters have been rounded up to live together on a single island. When the Xiliens invade Earth, they start with Godzilla Island sending kaiju to destroy its denizens, creating more of the classic
"suitmation" fight sequences that Godzilla fans crave. (buzzer dings) - Um, actually they destroy
some kind of city first. - Uh, no, incorrect. (buzzer dings) - Um, actually it's an archipelago? (host laughs) - It's a series of islands. - Um, actually it's a peninsula. (laughs) - Uh, no, it is an island. - Um...
(buzzer dings) - [Host] Yes. - Um, actually they went
there of their own accord. - (chuckles) No one made us live here, it's just a cool place to live. - How do we make all the
monsters live on an island? - (laughs) Laws. (guests laugh)
A big boat. - You guys have to. - You have to, it's the law. (imitates monster voice) "Okay." (guests laugh)
(buzzer dings) - Um, actually it's animated. - Uh, ooo, uh, ooo, uh, you know what? Close enough, I'm gonna count it. - Yay.
(buzzer dings) - Uh, so yeah, there is no,
there's no "suitmation". - There's no "soup nation", yeah. - No "soup nation" - No "suit nation". - No "soup nation" for you. (group laughs) - What up, all my soup fans? Welcome to "soup nation". - Celery. (group laughs) - Cauliflower. - Everyone's favorite soup, the first soup they think of, is celery. It is not animated in
the traditional sense. They largely use action figures. Uh, and uh.
- [Haley] Yeah. - Just use action
figures to, sort of, uh-- - With, like, hands? - No, they kinda do stop motion. - Yeah, like stop motion. And, uh, and in fact, um,
uh, many of the monsters were someone from a toy
vending machine in space. - Yeah, that sounds right. - They're sort of, like,
kind of like, acknowledge that, like, these are toys
that we're playing with and they just, like, come
out of a big, floating toy vending machine. I like this premise of,
like, making all the monsters live on one island. It feels like a, like a-- - Like a battle royale. - Battle royale, or even like
a real world, big brother, road rules kinda thing. (guests laugh) "What happens when all the
monsters in the world, like--" - Monster Island, the Challenge. (laughs) - Great, well, that
point will go to Haley. (imitates video game gun) - [Host] Vampires in the
"Twilight" novels are famously unharmed by sunlight, sparkling in the sun instead of burning into a pile of ash. They are also immune to
crosses, silver, and garlic, and the only way to kill
them is to drive a stake through their heart. (buzzer dings)
- [Host] Yeah. - Um, actually I think you
can, like, just physically, like, I think one vampire
kills another by, like, beating him to death. (group laughs) Right? Like, I think they just kinda fight until one dies in the first one. - Do a melee. - Like they just get,
like, punched enough, and then it's like, "Yeah, he's dead now." - It's like, you know, the way you would beat a person to death. (laughs) (host laughs) Like that kinda happens in a vampire. - Vampires, they're just like us. - You can just, with enough
trauma, kill a vampire. - You just, you just beat them hard enough and then the vampires dead? (guests laugh)
- Yeah? - [Host] I'm gonna say no to that. (buzzer dings) - Um, actually, oh uh, a
werewolf can also kill them. I'm just pulling this
from Tales from the Crypt. - While it might be true that a werewolf could kill them by certain methods, uh-- - Not wooden stake, to clarify. - Not beatin' 'em to death. - A werewolf just -------- - Fists of furry. (guests laugh) You can take away one
of my points for that. - Yeah, we might have to, um. (buzzer dings) - Um, actually the vampires
can die of some kind of, like, broken heart, emotional
trauma kind of thing. Because this is such a romantic world. - Uh, it's just they feel so hard. - Yeah.
- Haemolacria, or... - I wanna say, Zac, that you
were getting close to it. I just need more specifics here. And it's, the answer... (buzzer dings)
It is true that there is, like, there is a method by which you can kill them. It's not just like beating
the crap out of them, though. Zac, what is it? - Um, actually if you take their head off. - Yeah, that's what I was gonna-- - Uh, yes, that's what
we're looking for, so um-- - You beat 'em to death,
then you take their head off is what I meant. - It's only half correct. - Okay!
(buzzer dings) Um, actually for the other half a point, - [Host] Yeah.
you have to cut it off. - Uh...
- With a silver, steely knife. With a Steely Dan. (laughs) - Ah, the vampires have one weakness. Steely Dan. (guests laugh) The second part I was looking for was, um, was that they have to be dismembered and then set on fire. - Oh, wow.
- Yeah. - This is a two step process. And this is typically only
seen as being possible by werewolves, as that,
like, werewolves are perhaps the only beings who are
strong enough to actually be able to, like-- - Dismember them. - Dismember and set them on fire. - Got it. - Honestly, no points for that one. - [Zac] No "soup nation"
for you, no points for you. - We were guessing anyway. (Haley laughs) Strategy classic "Command
and Conquer: Red Alert" takes place in an alternate universe where an American general
has used a device called the Chronosphere to go back
in time and eliminate Hitler before his rise to power. (buzzer dings) - Um, actually it's
Einstein going back in time. - That's correct. - Yeah.
- [Zac And Haley] Oh. - I didn't understand
anything from the question. Not a single word. - Uh, it is not an American
general who goes back in time to stop Hitler. It's Albert Einstein. - Wow.
- Yeah. - That's great. - He's a very active
figure in that universe. He, like, kills Hitler, I think. It's crazy. - Wow. - So does that, like, in the game, like, Albert Einstein kills Hitler? - I'm pretty sure, or else, he, like, orchestrates it, or something. He's not much of a patent clerk at all. It's also, it's basically
blaming Albert Einstein for, like, ruining the world. 'Cause then suddenly, the
Soviets are way more powerful, 'cause they don't fight Hitler. And then you get a whole thing
going on when it's his fault. - Einstein started that arms race. - [Alex] Yeah.
(guests laugh) - That's also, like,
weird, 'cause it's like, it's not like the Cold War didn't exist. You know, like, it's like,
"Man, can you imagine "the alternate history where
the U.S. and the Soviet Union "were locked in some
sort of bitter dispute?" It's like, yeah, you didn't
need to make Einstein go back in time to kill
Hitler to make that happen. The work was done. - Yeah, a lot of the
scariness is like, the Soviets dominate a lot of Europe. And it's like, "Yeah, the Eastern block." - I've heard of it. - [Alex] That was a thing. - Just wait until they move into Asia. - Right.
(Haley laughs) - Hmm.
- Hmm, interesting. Uh, well that's a point for Alex. (magical tinkling)
(game show interlude) Very good, well, this is a
game we're calling Order Up. So on the other side of
this board, you have, uh, a group of things that we want you to put in a specific order. And those things are aliens. And that specific order is by size. Uh, so we would like you
to, um, uh, to take a look at these aliens and arrange them in order from smallest to largest. Go ahead and flip it over here. (suspenseful music) - [Host] So, Alex, tell us
what order these should be in. - I did, Space Amoeba,
Aquillian, Zergling, Bioraptor, Sarlacc, Cromulon. And I feel okay about it. - Zac, show us what you got. - Space Amoeba, I think
it's a classic misdirect. Amoeba, but large. Maybe it's also a double misdirect. Maybe it's actually tiny. - Are you arranging this
from largest to smallest? - This is largest to smallest. - Okay, uh, I asked for
smallest to largest, but it's good to know that-- - Can I just, is that okay? - Yeah, you can do it in
that order, that's fine. - All right, so I'm saying
this is the largest. - [Host] Okay, I understand. - Second largest, Cromulon. Third largest, Sarlacc. Third smallest, Bioraptor. (laughs) Second smallest, Zergling. Smallest, the Arquillian. - Very good, and then Haley. - I did exactly the same as
Alex, just with these two reversed, that was at the last second. - [Host] Okay.
- And it could be bad. - Cool, so this is fun. So, uh, this is fun,
um, Alex, you were close but you had one out of place that shifted almost everything else in
your thing to be incorrect. - No. - [Host] Uh, so you in
fact, only have on correct. Haley, you have two correct. And Zac, you have four correct. - [Haley] Again. - Let's uh, let's take
a look at this order. Indeed, that space amoeba
was bit of a ---- around, so it should be the Arquillian first. Um, and because you had your space amoeba in the wrong place, because
you fell for our little trap, that shifted everything. But Arquillian, Zergling,
Bioraptor, Sarlacc. The space amoeba is quite large,
for some that have realized this, it's from Star Trek. And then, Cromulon, who is planet sized. - Aruillian's the thing
from Men in Black that gets stabbed in the neck and is
like, (imitates suffocating) inside their like, human suit. - [Host] That is correct. - [Haley] Oh, that's what he was. I was like, "Why is he so familiar?" - [Zac] Why does he look like ----? - [Alex] 'Cause he's dying. - It looks like, ------' ---.
- [Host] ---. (guests laugh) - The roach guy, I always
thought looked like Steve Bannon. - Yes, he does. - Yeah.
- [Host] He does. And legal, that's not slander. We're allowed to say
that because it's true. - No matter what your
politics, we can agree on this. - We can all agree, Steve
Bannon is a cockroach monster from outer space, wearing
a human skin suit. (Haley laughs) - (imitates character) I'm
looking for break part. (group laughs) - (imitates character) On internet. - (imitates character) I need salt water. (guests laugh)
(buzzer dings) - Hey, we're not perfect here, either. And I make a mistake sometimes too. If you notice something that I got wrong, you can correct me by
tweeting @UmActuallyShow, or by going to our
exclusive drop out discord and correcting me there. If we like what you have
to say, we might feature it in a future episode and give you a point. All right, well we will move
on to the next statement here. Besides the obvious similarity
in title, "Deep Space Nine" and "Babylon 5" had a remarkable
number of things in common. Both shows took place on
a space station serving as a hub for a variety of alien species. Both featured a recently
widowed commander. Both had an idealistic
doctor hiding illegal genetically engineered abilities. Both shows even featured
the exact same actor playing a high-ranking
officer who attempts a coup of Earth's government. (buzzer dings) - Um, actually one is not a space station? - They're both space stations. (buzzer dings) - Um, actually Captain Sisko
is not recently widowed? It's been a while.
(host laughs) - It's been a while. - Get over it, Sisko, you piece of- You're over here moping
around the station. Get over it. People die.
- Rub some dirt on it and move on.
(guests laugh) - Sometimes people just
get beaten to death. And it's fine.
(guests laugh) Get over it. Uh, no, that's not what we're going for. - [Alex] Oh man.
- Yeah. (buzzer dings) - Um, actually one of
the doctors doesn't have this genetic engineering special power. - Uh, that's correct. - Woo hoo!
(host laughs) (laughs) Ooo, yeah, digging
back into the tiny scraps. Gonna get at those sweet, sweet points. (buzzer dings) - Uh, so Doctor Julian
Bashir, of Deep Space Nine was illegally genetically enhanced. Doctor Stephen Franklin,
of Babylon 5, participated in a, kind of, underground
railroad for human telepaths. He, sort of like, helped them. - Really? - [Host] Yeah. - Great, all right. - That's his deep flaw? - Yeah, how dare you help these people. Well, they both had a
secret that they were- They both were, sort of, hiding something. There are a lot of people who claim that, that uh, Deep Space Nine is a deliberate and direct, um, uh, rip off of Babylon 5. Because, um, the creator
of Babylon 5, like, pitched it out to whoever
it was at the time. I think, CBS. Uh, and they were like, "No, thank you. "We'll pass, we'll pass." And then while it was in
production, they were like, "Cool, we gotta work
on this new Star Trek, "and it's, uh, it has all these things." And it has all these similarities to it. So people, I think there might've even been a lawsuit about it. It was just like, "Hey, this is our idea. "You just put a Star
Trek skin on top of it." - "And we changed the number." (group laughs) - "It's not a Babylon 5, it's a nine." All right, well, we'll move on here. Uh, and here's a Harry Potter question. Many of the dark wizards in "Harry Potter" once attended Hogwarts,
like Bellatrix Lestrange, Vincent Crabbe, and Alecto Carrow. Interestingly, every
dark wizard who attended the wizarding school was sorted into house Slytherin or Gryffindor. There are no known dark wizards from Ravenclaw or Hufflepuff. (buzzer dings) - Um, actually Alecto Carrow
didn't attend Hogwarts. - Uh, incorrect. - Dang. (buzzer dings)
- [Host] Yes, Alex. - Um, actually, uh, Alecto
Carrow was a Ravenclaw? - Uh, no, no. - [Guests] Hmm. (buzzer dings) - Um, actually there were wizards from the other two schools. (stammers) you know, houses. - That is far too broad. I'll need you to be more specific. - There were, um, actually there were dark wizards from Ravenclaw. That's correct. - [Guests] Ah. - Can ya name one? - Uh. - I'll give it to you unless
someone else can name one. Or if you can name one. - Um, actually well of course. One of the dark wizards was, the third person you named. - Alecto Carrow, again? No.
- [Haley] Um, actually-- - No. - Uh, it was Bellatrix Lestrange. - Uh, no. - Damn. - [Host] Alex, you got a guess over there? - How 'bout a Crabbe Hufflepuff. - Uh, no, no, no, no. - (laughs) Now we're getting further. - Crabbe Hufflepuff sounds like a snack. (guests laugh) It sounds like it's something
you order off a dim sum card. - Oh my god, for some
reason when you said that, I was like, "Oh, a snack?", like... - Ooo, Crabbe Hufflepuff
sounds like a snack. Crabbe is thick and can get it. (guests laugh) Zac, you fully guessed that, but whatever. Uh, you'll get the point. Um, uh, there, we know of a
dark wizard from Ravenclaw. Uh, Quirinus Quirrell, who is in, uh, in the very first book. Quirrell was a Ravenclaw, and he full on had Voldemort growin' out of his head. So um, point for Zac. (buzzer dings) - He was also a snack. - He was also a snack. Two heads for one, my my. - The way that white
man rocked that turban. (group laughs) - Wait, if someone
stepped up and stopped him from appropriating it... - [Guests] Yeah.
- It's just a whole thing. - He wouldn't have anything to hide, he'd just have a baseball hat. (guests laugh) He's got, like, a trucker hat. Voldemort's just, like,
staring through the mesh. He's like, "What's going on out there?" (magical tinkling)
(game show interlude) So we're gonna play a game
called Title of Words. Uh, now, uh a lot of-- - What a creative name for this game. - Well, you see, a lot of, uh, a lot of sci-fi and
fantasy novels have titles that are, like, a blank of something. A thing of something else. - Oh
- Oh yeah. - So what we've done is
we've taken six real titles of novels with that structure. And we've taken all the nouns
and we've jumbled them all up. And it's up to you to
put them in the order that actually reflects titles of books that actually exist in the world. Uh, whoever gets the
most will get the point. Go ahead and flip those
over and take a look. Look at all these nouns. (suspenseful music) (Haley laughs)
- Uh, great. - As before, we'll go down the line. Alex, tell us what books
are out there in the world. What do you know? - So these are definitely books. Uh, we've got The Pearls of Lutra, The Robots of Dawn, The Three
Stigmata of Palmer Eldritch, The Boat of Gifts, Gods
of the Kingdom, and A War of a Million Years. - All right, uh, Zac. - Well, obviously Palmer
Eldritch of the Three Stigmata, The Pearls of Gods, The Robots of the Boat, A War of a Million Years, Gifts of Lutra, The Kingdom of Dawn. - [Host] Uh, very good and
Haley, what do you have? - All right, I weirdly, it
was close to with Alex again. The Pearls of Lutra, A
War of a Million Years, The Boat of Gifts, "How Santa Arrives to People Who Live in the Sea", and The Robots of Gods, The Three Stigmata of Palmer Eldritch, and The Kingdom of Dawn. - [Host] Very good. - Can I just, real quick? - Yes
- Make a guess about one? 'Cause I just remembered it. - [Host] Sure. - The Pearls of Lutra is a Redwall book. - Uh, yeah. Uh, I'm gonna let you
have that 'cause you're still in last place.
(guests laugh) - I didn't mean for points, I just wanted to see if I had it right. You're telling me The
Robots of the Boat is wrong? (group laughs) - "iRowboat" (guests laugh) Okay, well, Zac, if we're
counting The Pearls of Lutra, uh, you have one, if not,
you have zero correct. Um, uh, Haley you had two correct. - Again. - And Alex, you had three
correct, um, so let's go ahead and let's take a
look what these should be. It should be The Three
Stigmata of Palmer Eldritch, The Robots of Dawn, The Pearls
of Lutra, A War of Gifts, The Boat of a Million Years,
and The Kingdom of Gods. - [Haley] Wow. - So I had Palmer Eldritch
of the Three Stigmata. Not The Three Stigmata of Palmer Eldritch. - That's his family. He's Palmer Eldritch
of the Three Stigmata. - Some cultures say it
differently, you know. - Uh, well that point will go to Alex. - I feel solid about The Robots of Gods. - It reminds me of, like, it sounds like a retelling of, like, Greek mythology. But in the future with robots. - Yeah. - Exactly.
- Zeus Bot vs. Hades Bot. - Poseidon Bot immediately short circuits, like, as soon as it hits the water. - Go, to the sea! (imitates
robot short circuiting) (guests laugh) Smoke billowing out. - Aphrodite is causal sex robot. - Aphrodite's just a vibrator. - Future sex robot, yeah. (video game booting up) - And this is our last question. This is, as always,
about real like skills. If you don't have sterile
water to drink in an emergency, you can run water through a
coffee filter or clean cloth and then boil it for one to three minutes. If you can't boil water,
you can use bleach instead. Add any chlorine bleach to
water using an eyedropper, roughly two drops per quart
if it's 6% sodium hypochlorite or slightly less if it's 8.25%. Stir in the bleach, let
it stand for 30 minutes, and the water should be drinkable. (buzzer dings) Add it, yes. - Um, actually you can't use bleach. - You can use bleach. - It's ------ up. - Yeah.
(Haley laughs) (buzzer dings) - [Host] Yes. - Um, actually you need to boil it longer. - Uh, no. (buzzer dings) - Um, actually it's four drops per quart. - Uh, no. - Dang.
- [Host] Yeah. (buzzer dings) - Zac. - Um, actually you can
drink it right away. (group laughs) - Yum, yum, yum, don't wait for anything. (imitates choking) It's like, yeah, like
stirring a nice cocktail. It's like you just stir it up. Uh, no, no, that's not correct. Uh, I will go ahead and call that. It's also 'cause this one is, uh, extremely "nitpicky" anyway. - Yeah, what is it? - Uh, so uh, I said that you
can use any chlorine bleach, uh, for this, but that's not true. Uh, you don't wanna use any
that have any added cleaners, any added scents, or any that
are marked as color-safe. Um, because those have
chemicals in them that will be extremely harmful, but if
you have just, like, a plain, uh, chlorine bleach, you
can actually use that in an emergency to, uh,
to sterilize the water. - Wow, earthquake safe. - Earthquake safe. A lot of people will put
bleach in earthquake kits, for just this purpose. But they do expire after a certain point, so, like, if you do have
bleach in your earthquake kit, you'll have to, uh, swap
it out periodically. - Oh, wow. - I don't think we
should tell people that. There's no way I don't fuck that up. (group laughs) - You know what? I think that's fair, 'cause
then even, like, reading this it would be like one of
those things where, like, it's like, "I don't trust the internet." You know, it's just
like, "I'm not gonna... "No, this isn't gonna work." - There's too much actual
science class memories in my head of, like, "Well,
I ------ that experiment up." - Oh, for sure. - To like, bet on my life for it. - Yeah, where you're
like, in the science lab and it's just like,
"Cool, do this and then "this is the result you should get." It's like, "I did not get that result. "That's not what happened." - Stupid titration lab in chemistry. It's like, "Boy, it just
went to bright pink." "Well, you screwed it up. "Gotta start all over." - Yeah. - By the way, why wouldn't
you just put iodine tablets in your earthquake kit? - That's probably better, uh. (laughs) - I don't wanna put bleach in my water. - Hey look, I'm just
saying, if it's dire straits and you're looking for something, this is a thing you can do. - Also, I feel like the
way my memory is gonna encode this is gonna be like, "Okay, I boil it,
- Drink bleach. - "and then...", right... (group laughs) Or like, "I boil it,
then I use the filter. "Then Quirell was in
Ravenclaw, and then..." And I'm gonna be... - Nah, no I can't remember how this goes. - Alfred Einstein, what do I do? - Albert Einstein went back in time and killed Steve Bannon, and... (guests laugh) - "It's a paradox, so I
should put two drops of water "in bleach and down it goes." - Well, uh, I believe that
makes Zac our winner of this, with four points. Three points for Haley and Alex, each, making them tied for second. Thank you all for joining
us for this episode. For playing with us, and
going on whatever this weird fever dream was. Uh, and thank you for watching it. Uh, you can, uh, join us
next time for even more pedantic corrections,
here, on Um, Actually.
