Robert Greene "The Art of Seduction" Part 1

we all have needs and wants but can we actually get what we desire I'm very kill brick my guest Robert Green not only believes we can but must make every effort to do so the author of one of the most important books and bestsellers of the modern era the 48 laws of power now turns his attention to a more suitable way for us to achieve power in the modern era with his book the art of seduction we get an indispensible primer of the art of persuasion and the book is so rich with information this will be a two-part episode in the first we'll examine the seductive character and in our second episode we'll explore the seductive process and how you can obtain it between the lines with Barry KITT Rick's is made possible in part by Sam Ash music a proud sponsor between the lines of Barry character Sam Ash has been serving musician since 1924 to unlock your inner musician information is available at Sam Ash calm Robert welcome back now this is either record-tying or record-breaking fifth time you've been on my show it is always a pleasure wait a minute it is going to be record-breaking because we're going to do two part long because the book is divided into two parts our episode is going to be divided into two parts welcome back my friend well thank you for having me Barry I want to I want to be the record holder for your show I want to be the Michael Jordan of very Kubrick you already beyond that so as I said the book is broken down into two phases this art of seduction the first one is the seductive character how do you do and by the way it's meant so that you can figure out which or oftentimes the traits are a little blended so you may be a blending of certain traits but you can find out which character you could strive to if you want to and you should want to the way we will discuss being a seducer and the other part is is actually the the process that one needs to go through to be successful at it so that's what we're going to do in Episode two the first part we're going to give a little overview of what seduction is okay and some of the character traits we'll never get through all of the types but we'll get through some of them and in in that regard and basically I almost looked at this as I don't want to say a corollary I couldn't even describe it but something as a an answer to the 48 laws of power specifically for women at first but later on as we find out for men as as well because as you say for women it was seduction that gave them the first power men later adapted it but it was women who really didn't they didn't have the arms that the men did or the strength and the way they were but they did have seduction yes I in the 48 laws of power I'm interested in what I call indirect power soft power because I maintain in the world today if you're too direct if you're too brutal and aggressive you won't last very long people won't like you so we live in a world of soft powers in politics it's in advertising and it's in seduction and seduction is a female women invented seduction there's no doubt about it I described how that happened why it happened and when you read a lot of history as I do you know there's not a lot of women disappear in history a lot there are only a few queens and empresses and courtesans but their influence on history is incredibly profound in seduction it had a profound impact on us the whole idea of Enchantment of enchanting another person of putting them under your spell of making them fall in love whether as just the end of it being love or a form of power is something that women create and have had a huge impact and I want to trace that impact to even politics today where I feel like politicians are seducing the public so this is a different kind of power but it's related to what I talked about in the 48 laws well you also say it is a lasting and more effective form of power and when I even when you came into the green room and I said in a weird way it's more villainous to a certain extent because you really are penetrating another person's spirit in fact that's one of the the pots you do villainous may not be the right word to use but it's got that much kind of power I tell people when you go see a movie or you read a book let's say a movie and you feel like the movie is casting a spell on you it's drawing you into the story and it's having an emotional impact on you and by the end of the movie you're moved or you're crying or you're laughing or whatever it is that is a form of seduction where you've allowed your psychology your psychology to be penetrated by a director a writer ohm ever and you're seduced and it's actually an amazing power that humans have the problem is some people are closed to duck to seduction they don't want to be seduced they're not interested in other people I find seduction to be a very social phenomenon to be a great seducer you have to be interested in people you have to not there's a difference between a cold kind of analytic the typical sort of cold male seducer which I talk about in the book but I'm advocating a more sort of hot or warm seduction in which both people are seducing each other well the other thing is that when when men got involved in this form of power they added something you said called seductive language yes and that was an important element that was that I don't want to say it was missing but they emphasized on it because it was the words that they could use if they weren't going to use brute strength or brutality or anything like that so words became an important part especially for the male seducer yes well I said you know obviously men and women are different men tend to be seduced by visuals the way a woman looks the sort of the primal way of seducing a man women are very prone to words to just hearing to the verbal aspect and seducers to typical dawn one of the 17th century which is where the old Don Juan legend basically began 15 16th century they discovered that through language through poetry through casting a spell on a woman with their words that this was the weakness that they had and so many of these great early seducers were just great talkers it's interesting because if you look at like some of the great ones in 16th 17th century they were not handsome men they were actually one of them was physically repulsive but had such an incredible way with words that he could seduce almost any woman and then you know obviously there are women who are great with words I'm not saying that it's strictly male or female but these are the two sort of weaknesses that each that each gender has well you hinted at this before and I want to explore it further because you say now today we've really reached the ultimate evolution of seduction because virtually from business to the world of politics to the world of love relationships there is a form now of seduction because we are taking away from brute force and brute brutality and things like that so we are in this era of almost if you if you don't really learn the art of seduction you're almost left behind yes and it's infiltrated politics to a very large extent I look in the in in the art of seduction the icon for me the first great American even world politician that kind of mastered it but it's a American was John F Kennedy I claimed it he was I'm not just me other riders have as well he was a master seducer obviously with women you know he's legendary for that but using television and using Hollywood the imagery the icons of Hollywood he his father was a producer in Hollywood and Kennedy was obsessed with Gary Cooper and Cary Grant and James Dean and Montgomery Clift he studied them he knew how to have the same sort of charisma on camera he was our first television president and he seduced the American public in a really powerful way I mean it was a very close election with Nixon so it wasn't like a great you know he it was very close run victory but it was very powerful and that he set the bar that now a politician has to have a television presence has to be seductive and has to find a way to bring people together through language through imagery Kennedy was sort of a master and so I want to take you away from thinking of seduction as just the sort of thing that men do on women or women do on men it's something that permeates our culture it's in advertising it's in marketing it's on the internet it's in politics it's different obviously a sexual seduction is not it's the same as Kennedy seducing the American public but the dynamics the casting of the spell the enchantment as a similar similar process but you also want us to be certain that you don't have to be a Kennedy you believe that you don't even really have to transform your own character in any physical form or things like that but we can learn the art of seduction it's not just the charismatic person that maybe the natural seducer or have the natural ability but the average person especially when real if they could they can if they want to learn at least the rules and how to apply them in that positive way I'm saying not in that siliceous negative way but they can use it to benefit what is more important as you say then the ability to persuade yes and and so first of all this is the desire to be a seducer which a lot of people will say oh I don't want that I'm not interested in that and what I'd say in the book is remember the time that you did you experience probably in your life when another person had fallen in love with you and you sensed that you had power over them that they were under your spell that they were that the things that you said excited them and interested in them that the walls the resistance that people normally have are so frustrating you can't reach your kids you can't reach your wife the people that work there close to you and in that moment when someone had fallen in love that wall came down and you have this sort of back and forth electricity it's amazing you love it it's powerful it's great you want that you want you don't want to be you don't want the sexual version of it in your office obviously but you want to be able to persuade to get people to lower some of their usual walls and resistance to you so the first thing is you want seduction in your life believe me you want it the other thing is you have a misconception about seduction it's not this you say the villain is male you know kind of figuring out these very cold calculating strategies that's not what it's about it's there's there's got to be a naturalness to it if you're someone that has calculated they're way too much in the process this is what I'm going to step a be even see it's not seductive people can read it seduction there's a body language to it there's a kind of nonverbal communication and we sense that another person is trying too hard they've read a book they read the art of seduction and they're applying the 24 strategies it doesn't work you have to bring out natural qualities that you have and I maintain in the book that every person has a kind of natural quality that makes them authentically seductive whether it's the natural who's kind of childlike and spontaneous or the rake or the siren or the ideal lover whichever type it is it's in you it's latent it it wants to come out and that's what will make you an interesting and good seducer and what makes the person's seduce a bull is that you say what people lack in life is not more reality but illusion and and I guess what a seducer brings out of that person is this will sounds funny but is the reality of the illusion so to speak so in other words it's the it's that inner thing that they desire and what they feel is missing that's the other part what they feel is missing well you know I'm a lot of people complain about the art of seduction and they say well shouldn't people just be who they are why can't we just be natural and just do what comes you know first thing to us you know why do I have to put effort into it why do I have to read a book well the thing is the fact that I say that seduction and romance is like a courtship it's like a ritual that you'll see animals go through when they're in an exhibit in a mating ritual humans have the same thing it's called courtship it's called romance it involves certain steps it involves getting the other person excited about you and interested in you etc and the worst feeling is in just the romantic part of seduction let's just talk about that is that the other person isn't putting out any effort they're just being who they are you go to their house and you have a date and they're just wearing their usual clothes and they've ordered pizza and there's no effort there's no enchantment there's no theater people are dying to be taken out of their lives out of the banal day-to-day work and be taken on a ride they want enchantment they want some drama in their life they want pleasure I talk about in the book it's like a child seduction is reaching the child of everybody and when you were a child you were 1 years old what was the greatest pleasure you had it was being picked up by your father your mother and kind of whirled around and taken everywhere and lifted me twirls etc the sense that someone was taking you somewhere and you were under their control made you laugh it gives you this incredible pleasure and that's what happens when you see a movie and it takes you on this journey where you don't know where it's going what's happening next people don't have enough of that in their lives and the thing that you say is we must remember it is the form that matters not the content well humans nowadays were - in the words we just talk and talk and talk and talk and talk and a classic thing in the seduction realm will be a man or a woman saying I love you like when will they say I love you is a big deal and all I try and tell them the book is that's not the language of love that's not the language of seduction it's something nonverbal you have to learn this new language of seduction there's nothing to do with words it's in your body language it's in your actions it's so much more powerful when the other person feels that you love them one thing you do by the way I should let people know how the book is structured because like similar to the 48 laws of power there is a narrative that goes through the book there are historical aspects of it and there are applications of it and various different modes that you can look at and one of the historical aspects you talk about is Benjamin Disraeli and former Prime Minister of England and and he gives us a clue of I think what is a key another key and it is talk to a man about himself and he will listen for hours yeah Benjamin does like really is one of the greatest seducers ever and absolutely brilliant first of all consider this he was a dark-skinned Jewish man in England who became Prime Minister imagine the prejudice against somebody like that in a country like that how did he ever do it because he was a charmer a seducer he could seduce the birds out of the trees he seduced Queen Victoria she was madly in love with this dark-skinned Jewish man and the whole art of it was forge Israeli was to make the other person feel like they were special they were brilliant there's a quote I have in the book I'm not going to get it exactly right but there's this woman who said after sitting next to Gladstone at dinner Gladstone was the great rival of Disraeli after sitting next to Gladstone at dinner I thought he was the most brilliant man in England after sitting next to Disraeli ydynt I thought I was the most brilliant woman in England Gladstone irritated people because he was so argumentative so superior glad Disraeli charmed everyone because he made you feel like you were special you were brilliant and he gave you the sense that you were the star of the show here he took Queen Victoria the most prudish uptight woman you can imagine and he had her completely under his thumb she wrote a book which nobody read because she wasn't a writer but she had vanity she has ego everybody has ego and so now it is Rayleigh would refer to her when you said you know we authors when we rhyme he was a great writer but he made her think that she was a writer like he was I mean the guy is one of the the great seducers of all time well because again what you get a sense in what you mentioned in the book is he's appealing to your emotions rather than necessarily your reason that's another key to this is to appeal to that emotion not so much the mental aspect yes so getting back to the the nonverbal aspect of seduction you know there's words that you can use to reason with people and there's a place for that and it's important and they're words that you use to cast a spell so when we read poetry when we read Shakespeare we're not looking for rationality for logic we're looking for that spell for that feeling for that emotion one of the greatest male seducers that ever live with Errol Flynn the actor the power that the Errol Flynn had I had to study and figure out what was a secret to a success it wasn't really anything he did he was completely non defensive there wasn't a defensive bone in his body he was open non-judgmental and women would say that when you would get into a room with him you were afraid of this guy ten minutes with him in the room and you've lost all of your inhibitions they said it was like drinking four martinis just to be there they hadn't drunk a thing because he was so relaxed that he would pass that mood to you human beings are not just logical animals we're physical we have bodies and our emotions our physicality responds to the other physicality the other person so you bury being very relaxed and open makes me feel relaxed if you're all defensive and worried makes me defensive and worried these are the sort of the grammar of seduction that you have to learn there's one little deeper element though and that is that I'm going to use your words seduction is a form of persuasion that seeks to bypass even the consciousness we talked about the emotional but you could be conscious of the emotional and really when it stirs the unconscious mind now you really seduce yes well that said that's the whole art in a nutshell people consciously won't admit to wanting to be seduced that everybody secretly wants to so the key is everyone's different what would seduce one person what they're unconsciously need or want or missing in life is not the same as another person I just remembered this anecdote it's not in my book because it's happened to me but I when I was young 21 I lived in Paris I was working at a hotel and this is sort of when I'd started getting interested in seduction because I met a man who worked at this hotel you know I'm sorry we didn't work there he just frequented it this is what a hotel were all the models stayed in Paris he was this Brazilian man who's the greatest seducer I personally ever met this is good-looking but he would just he have the art down and he was seducing everyone and I was just amazed I couldn't believe how does it was a secret to this guy his success and one time I was with him I was walking down the street and he was with his latest conquest and this other woman came up to him all angry and bitter and crying it was somebody that he had seduced and abandoned I go oh oh we're gonna see a fight it's gonna get ugly I would took the other woman the side let's get away thirty seconds later she was completely melted and and was back under his charm and he was like signaling to us to leave is because he was like that Errol Flynn Singh he had nothing defensive about him he was sort of like yes I understand and he through his physicality through the fact that he didn't get angry that he didn't get defensive he didn't start defending himself he say well let me explain no he he just immediately went into the sort of calm loving intense attention mode and it worked on her I know that's what I was getting at is her unconscious she just melted in front of him Robert you seduced us all today and then when you come back it is when we come back for episode two now we're going to teach them how they all can be produces as well thank you my friend you're very welcome thank you and thank you for joining us I now want to leave you with these words from the art of seduction we all have the power of attraction the ability to draw people in and hold them there in our thrall few from all of us though are aware of this inner potential I'm Barry Kim Rick be aware for when you are difference between the ability to draw people in or not they reveal flew in [Music] to connect with fairy like them on Facebook and follow him on Twitter as fairy Kippur and to contact buried directly view past episodes of between the line and read his weekly blog visit us at berry Kibera stuck between the lines with Barry difference is made possible in part by Sam Ash music a proud sponsor between the lines Barry Kippur Sam Ash has been serving musician since 1924 to unlock your inner musicians information is available at Sam Ash calm [Music] you you

Channel: Barry Kibrick

Views: 569,971

Rating: 4.87538 out of 5

Keywords: barry kibrick, between the lines, full episode, pbs, robert greene, art of seduction, seduction, power, 48 laws of power

Id: 8kIxf9CyQlM

Length: 26min 47sec (1607 seconds)

Published: Tue Mar 07 2017