r/Maliciouscompliance "EDIT MY PROM PHOTOS! NOW!" "lol ok"

welcome to our slash malicious compliance we're a lowly employee destroys the reputation of a millionaire CEO second semester of my freshman year I was taking a music theory course the professor was very serious about her job and this class was a bit of a weed out class for students who wanted to pursue music education I was thinking it for fun by the time the end of the semester rolled around I got the feeling she didn't really like me much because I didn't pay attention in class but still got A's on the homework exams and playing tests I played piano for a decade by this point so she couldn't really punish me for anything since I wasn't disrupting the class but was just a thorn in her side through lack of participation thank God that wasn't part of our grade our final project was to find a poem we liked and craft a song using the poem as the lyrics as she passed out the requirement sheet she announced that she would be playing these for the class so we need to put in effort so that we don't feel embarrassed by what she plays in front of everyone about 30 people she shoots a glance at me the least involved student as she says that which I took as a challenge I found a poem called a minor bird and decided to craft my masterpiece in the key of E flat minor the reasoning six out of the seven notes are lowered a half-step so it's not a matter of thinking everything I see is lowered it's everything but one note is lowered which is fairly hard to keep track of well sight reading something that utilizes both hands on the piano we were to hand them in at the beginning of class and she would go through the stack and play them without practicing first it's a freshman level class how hard could it be I spent weeks working on this because I wanted to make sure it was both well-written and an absolute pain to play I had upperclassmen take a look at it to make sure everything was labeled correctly and they told me I was the most magnificent bastard ever because this professor had worked most of the students in the department who had taken her class then the day comes we all turn our papers in and visibly excited by everything the professor comes in and goes full Dolores Umbridge I certainly hope everyone met the requirements and put care into their work if not we'll soon find out she goes to the piano and pulls the first paper off the stack and makes some comments about it that aren't negative but are a bit goading regarding the amount of effort it seemed to take to write it she apparently pulls mine up about two-thirds of the way sits down to play it and stops at the first chord she looks around makes eye contact with me and straight up glares before regaining her composure and plunking through my piece there's several chords that make a nice crunch before she corrects herself that annoying not flat note tripped her up every time and it sounds like whoever wrote this piece did a terrible job because of how it sounded at the end the meek international student who has perfect pitch raises her hand and goes excuse me professor that piece you just played it has six flats in the key yes the professor said yes it did I didn't quite expect that and then the student said you didn't play all six flats it didn't sound professor turns glares at me and goes no no I did not I got a 97% because she marked a chord label incorrect I went back in and showed her that she missed the non flat note in that chord and that it was actually labeled correctly got it changed to a 100% now unfortunately I can't play this song in this video because YouTube is SuperDuper strict about music but I did include the link to opiez song down in the description if you want to hear it for yourself also the user attic door down in the comments pointed out that the poems last four lines are perfectly suited for this situation the fault must partly have been in me the bird was not to blame for his key and of course there must be something wrong in wanting to silence any song our next reddit post is from ding dong de long Wang so yeah a couple of years ago I was working for an IT company which also provided server management and general domains and email services we had some really big companies as clients so we were used to some really idiotic demands but most of the time we could convince the people whose main job seemingly was to be in charge to listen to our expertise not so with mr. bigwig mr. bigwig was the CEO of a large automobile sales company he was also the type of guy who prided himself with being a great negotiator and thinking so far ahead regular people can't follow and he was a complete butthole to everyone mr. bigwig went on a holiday once and set up an automatic out-of-office reply in his mail account but as is the technical standard everybody who wrote him during that time only received the reply just one single time when mr. bigwig returned from his vacation this infuriated him a lot so he called our support line and yelled and cussed his way up our hierarchy until he had me on the phone I tried to tell him that this was working as intended and tried to explain why but Mr bigwig wouldn't have any of it this went all the way to our chief technology officer who sent him a waiver to sign stating that we would deactivate this limitation but not be liable for any consequences in short then he told me to make the changes to mr. bigwigs account I tried to object but the CTO just smiled shrugged and went into his office mr. bigwig was happy he won and booked this as his latest negotiating victory now let us jump to December the 29th of the same year I get a phone call from mr. bigwig he is not happy he's not happy because he's blacklisted on about every blacklist in existence he's also not happy because he can't receive or send any email and he is not happy because he can't find any mail he received during the Christmas holidays or near them he can't find them because of the nice number in brackets beside his inbox folder that indicates the amount of unread emails he has reads 50,000 a quick look around the server logs tells me there are indeed some emails he didn't receive a hundred and fifty thousand to be exact they're still pending delivery because his inbox is full he's also not happy because he's the laughingstock of everybody he ever respected now let me guide you as the reader to the bottom of this what you don't know and what we also didn't know at the time is mr. bigwig was a member of a very exclusive group of business owners CEOs and high-ranking politicians around the globe the kind of people you would imagine sitting around a large oak table smoking cigars drinking 200 euro whiskies and discussing world dominance the group had a mailing list a sucky basic mailing list it went something like this in parentheses subject out-of-office reply hey thank you for the mail but I'm on holiday I will reply later then some random dude emailed the mailing list Merry Christmas and then the mailing list emailed everybody hey guys some random dude is wishing you Merry Christmas then bigwig replies to the mailing list thanks for telling me but I am on holiday I will reply later then the mailing list replied to everybody hey guys mr. big wig is on holiday he will reply later then bigwig replied to that mailing list thanks for telling me but I am on holiday I will reply later then the mailing list continued to reply to everybody hey guys mr. big wig is on holiday he will reply later and this loops infinitely it loops infinitely for the entire Christmas holiday this repeats until the server's give out so be be Diddy was not the only one who had thousands and thousands of emails in his folder all his fancy pants networking contacts had them to mr. bigwig raged hard at everyone who was brave enough to get on the phone with him threatened to sue us for millions of euros and to end us as a business we finally put him through to our founder who listened to his rant and told him he would send him a solution within the next 10 minutes he sent two documents a scan of his signed waiver in which the consequences of disabling the out of office message restriction were outlined in detail and a service contract allowing us to fix the problem to our abilities without any financial budget limitations but with a really nice read enormous estimated budget it was a good year for the company with an unexpected spike in revenue just before New Year's Eve then we have a contribution from fubar 754 down in the comments yeah I got to do this once it was an automated monitoring system that had pretty extensive logs and would send out a summary email every 30 minutes the new boss shows up and after a minor issue demands that we send an email every time we write something in the logs we go back and forth trying to explain that sending five gigabytes of log entries split in two God knows how many emails isn't going to work until the new boss just says do it because I said so and I'm in charge so we all shrug and get it ready to go for the next release and make sure that the boss is the only one getting the emails for this release I give our exchange admins a quick call to make them know about the impending tidal wave of messages five minutes after we start the program up new bosses email account is disabled and we get the call to rollback the changes from the head of IT and software development after that every changed new boss would propose had to get approved by the head of software development our next reddit post is from shine the dog I'm not a professional photographer but I do have decent equipment and a portfolio so a lot of friends will hit me up for disc at photo shoots most of them pay or at least buy me dinner but others expect me to do it for free I'm close with my ex-boyfriends family so I was thrilled when his younger sister asked me to come to her prom photos earlier this month until she told me to bring the camera I did mention to her that I'm doing online school and I have an exam due that week so the pictures might not be ready for another week she was fine with that within two hours of taking pictures of half a dozen high school students I ended up with 300 plus shots because everyone wanted the perfect Instagram shot whatever I can go home study and slowly work on sorting through the pictures later they're not paying me so I wasn't exactly motivated either I get a text from her and her mom that night at around 11 p.m. they want the pictures edited and uploaded by the next morning so they could be shown off on social media I tried to explain that I'm studying but they weren't having it they said we don't care how you edit it just make it look nice fine I spent the next three hours working on the pictures and editing them really nice that even I was proud of then I hid Shrek in the background of every single picture Shrek with his head poking out between the kids shrek posing happily shrek had a very nice time at the prom evidently I uploaded the pics and sent them off no one noticed the extra guests for weeks and I got my ear chewed out because my exes sister didn't appreciate her 900 followers on Instagram seeing Shrek grinning between her and her boyfriend they asked me to edit however I wanted it so I delivered Shrek was one of my best clients I've ever had our next reddit stories from underscore volley as a tech going on thirty years I've seen some stupid management directives this one is one of my favorites back in 2007 I worked for a large bank that is based in Atlanta and I worked in Richmond in a 28 storey office tower my primary job was desktop support and fixing phones at that time I was very athletic I moved fast all the time and hated to use the elevator if I had to go less than six floors I took the stairs my boss didn't care because as a team we were the most efficient team in the company as far as the number of tickets worked each week per tech we worked smart not hard so upper management in Atlanta decides one day to do a deep assessment on how all the text in the bank did our job my team gets a visit from Atlanta one day in the form of a heavyset guy who says he will be shadowing us to see how we did our job he was a bit of a condescending jerk too in his attitude he even had a stopwatch to time us now we all knew right away what was happening management wanted to outsource us so they needed to know what we did how long it took and what we used so they could put a cost on it before soliciting for bids let's just say my team was not thrilled about it now I decided to be a smartypants about this and my team knew what I had planned for this event I was told this overweight condescending jerk was to shadow us and time us okay he's gonna have to keep up time for malicious compliance I only used the stairs our lab was on the 20th floor a typical morning for me it would be like this I'd run a desktop monitor ticket to the sixth floor then go back to the 20th to get my phone bag to go to lower level one to the IPX to hook up a phone then go to the 14th floor to test the phone then up to 22 to fix the printer then down to seven to look at a laptop today I'm only doing the stairs so this guy was about to have a heart attack trying to keep up with me while I did my job I took no pity on him and didn't even have to pay attention to him as far as I was concerned this jerk was assisting others in having my job eliminate at some point I'd lost him in the stairwell later my boss says to me the guy was a bit mad for me taking the stairs but my boss just told him this is how my tech works and he is one of my best if you can't keep up that's your problem to this day I've said she was the best boss I've ever had later I found out what I did got back to upper management in Atlanta they were pissed yet they couldn't punish me because I was doing my job and did it very well the story also got around to other tags and they thought it was funny as heck what I did in April 2008 we found out we were out sourced just like we knew it was going to happen I no longer work there Oh P it really sucks that you lost your job but by the sound of it I'm glad that you're out of that company and that you were able to deliver a few parting blows before you left that was our sloshed malicious compliance and I would appreciate it if you would maliciously comply by subscribing to my channel

Channel: rSlash

Views: 833,264

Rating: 4.9192367 out of 5

Keywords: reddit, r/, rslash, r\, sub, subreddit, best of reddit, reddit top posts, top posts, top posts of all times, funniest posts, funny, comedy, funniest reddit posts, funny reddit posts, funny reddit, fails, cringe, maliciouscompliance, malicious, compliance, r/maliciouscompliance

Id: L8KeP1bcl-g

Length: 16min 31sec (991 seconds)

Published: Wed Jul 10 2019