r/maliciouscompliance | "DON'T Use That Machine Boss, It's BROKEN!"

hey everyone and welcome to story time my name is Jake and today we are gonna be looking at the subreddit our such malicious compliance where people conformed to the letter but not the spirit of a request if you new around here please do hit subscribe down below so that you never miss out on another video but for now let's sit back relax and enjoy some malicious compliance I don't know how to use my machine okay it was my first job out of high school I was hired as a trainee in a large engine reconditioning company it was one of those family-run businesses that start in the backyard and grew to the point where they might have been making millions but they were likely spending just as much all the family members worked there in all the top positions so you were never going to move up the ladder I was stationed at an old milling machine no computer no smart tech you mounted a cylinder head in the bay you manually dragged the milling head over visually lowered it until it made contact then raised it up one hundredth of a millimeter turn the mill on and manually wound the head across the part you will mill I got pretty good at using this mill the average heads milled per day was around 21 in one day I'd sometimes do 50 but luckily the worker in the station next to me caught on and when I was about to report my days worth of work he said 21 I was still young and dumb so I proudly said 50 he corrected me 21 tomorrow you pretend to work light bulb moment that I always remember to this day I'm in my forties now so from then on I'd work hard one day and have an easy day the next one day the mill needed serious maintenance the company was so tight that they didn't regularly maintain any of the machines they waited until they needed repairs I wrote down the issue I had and mentioned that this mill was not operational at any random moment the mill would jump and the head would drop about a millimeter the diamond tips would gouge the cylinder head and most of the tips would snap expensive instead of being told thanks for reporting it we'll get it fixed right away they told me off for being abusive to the machine that I didn't know how to use it correctly normally when something like this happened and it happened our law they would demote you to the acid wash or the camshaft bearing resurfacer the worst job in the company but instead they sent me to the new laser-guided computerized mill which was also out of order but had been waiting for the tech to come and resolve the issue the guide probe that was used when you initially put a new part in there was malfunctioning the machine would sense the part and instead of stopping resetting and then sensed the part again at a higher resolution it would smash the probe into the part and break the tip costing lots of money I tried to tell the supervisor that the machine he was sending me to was out of order but he shut me up before I even opened my mouth he jumped on the old mill and made me stick around to show me how to do it properly the mill couldn't have messed up at any better moment about 30% into the job the head dropped a few centimeters not millimeters smashed into the head the head went flying off the otherwise pretty solid mounds a scary moment being an old mill you could run this without the guard or sure which the supervisor did I went to say to please shut the door but he shut me up again fine I stood well away guess which direction the cylinder head went flying right at him hit him in the chest winded him knocked him to the floor and I immediately called an ambulance he was rushed off to the hospital and returned to work with some broken ribs it didn't end there though he blamed me for everything upon returning to work and said he hoped I continued working on the other male I was stationed at the acid wash by another supervisor another family member a big box with a cage we dumped parts into air and back out simple menial perfect nothing could really go wrong I went to say the other mill was broken too and tried to remind him that the probes kept snapping he wanted non of air once again showing me how to use the fancy mill he instructed me to lift the cylinder into the mill and mount ayr he programmed the mill for that model head close the door and press star the probe came down and kept going shattering into the head he swore so hard he hurt his ribs do you want me to go back to the acid wash now and until this is fixed I got sent to the area where we removed headstones better than the washed we used blow torches I guess he didn't want to be told what to do it's amazing how all these companies are like family-run businesses that do the whole Oh we'll just fix it when it needs to be fixed instead of Oh we'll just do scheduled maintenance yet they always end up paying a lot more it's just a few lines of code some time ago I was working on a control system overhaul project out with the 1990 stuff in with the newest earth one of the feature upgrades that allows the station to automatically handle multiple different model parts was impossible without more hardware and sensors the previous configuration required several minutes of changeover for different model parts to ensure that the station was properly set for each specific model I in my supervisor explained to the manager that what they were asking for required a revised butcher as there was no feasible way to write the logic to operate without certain inputs it was essentially asking to install auto driving functionality into a car that didn't have lidar or radar cameras or any sort of external sensors and this was entirely reliant on the car's built-in GPS to find its way around it's just a few lines of code figure it out so my team came up with an idea having the operator manually input required data before each production cycle starts which is about every 30 seconds because existing control system setup just didn't know otherwise the cycle will not start I did ask for operators Empire and they all thought it was an incredibly bad idea but the manager insisted they would get used to where operators hated it of course when it went live and management heard the whining after half a day of the madness we were instructed to put it in a bypass and we got management approval to install there after putting our warnings in writing about having a control system blindly operate with a set of assumed conditions that may rapidly change one of us put in an email statement you are asking us to create a self-driving car that assumes that it is on a straight Highway and there is nothing in its way at all times with the press of a button we can do that if you have no objections have you ever seen a machine drill into itself sever some high pressure coolant lines and then attempt to cycle with the super-expensive drill bits still tearing into the casted structural components it was not pretty as it turned out that super hard drill bit shatter instead of bending when struck by a high-speed transfer mechanism I wish I could share pictures and more detail but that's against legal department's policy edit the aftermath that people wanted I don't know the exact money figures of the damage but the biggest cost was the extended production downtime that the destroyed machine caused which required several weeks of mandatory overtime production schedules on Saturdays and Sundays on functional production lines to make up for the missed production quotas the machine itself was down for over three weeks that's well into the mulch million costs of replacement parts vendors or contractors to fix another clients mistake repairing the large structural casted components man-hours to troubleshoot over time for lots of people and so on there were enough competent managers to prevent the manager from getting promoted or etc and of course everyone's favorite more anti idiot procedures were put in place to ensure future event would not happen again although the responsible manager is still around for whatever reason in a different place with a different title maybe just had enough connections to avoid being shown the dost isalways that last bit that annoys me just the guy oh he had a just enough connections to not get fired now you should be fired other host s wants me to stay at the host stand and not bus tables I comply this is happening as I type this I hosted at a previous restaurant for two and a half years and pretty much know the ins and outs of the role of a host I recently moved and just started hosting at a new restaurant I am 20 and the host I am working tonight is 17 so I completed my training though I will yield the iPad / rotation to whoever has been here the longest so my coworker let's call her Hannah is in charge and so while she tells me where to see people and plays on her phone otherwise I am left to bus tables seat wipe and reset tables etc the other host I've worked with usually split the work equally with me but it's whatever I don't mind doing it all to pass the time Hannah gets a to-go order over the phone and puts it in now typically you wait until the Togo customer arrives before grabbing it so that you can help out and do other host duties but Hannah decides to go wait in the kitchen for around 20 minutes or so until her to go is ready our dinner rush is just ending so people are getting up I'm running around bussing tables while Hannah is in the kitchen waiting on that to go I literally have no tables besides the ones that need to be burst so I'm making sure no one is walking in and I go quickly to clean some off when I brought some dirty dishes and cups to the kitchen Hannah tells me not to bus tables and wait at the host stand to ensure every guest that comes in will be greeted yeah I get that but I need tables to seat the man and if they aren't coming in I'm going to do my job and bust those tables but she insists in a more rude than usual tone that I need to stay up there and not bus tables so I say okay and stand up the host and I play on my phone text some friends browse ready the works no one comes in meanwhile so many tables are getting up and need to get bossed my manager comes up and lets me know when Hannah gets back up there I'm cut and free to leave literally 30 ish minutes from when she first left the host and Hannah comes back up with this tiny to-go order and realizes the restaurant is a mess I'd let her know I'm caught and clocked out I am gone outlaw I don't even want to know the aftermath for this story cuz I kinda just want to leave it at her leaving the door and this person just looking at all this mess on the tables and just being stunned compliance by not doing my job I used to work as a programmer at a manufacturing facility back in the mid-2000s we added the ability to order certain products online my job was to build a service that would accept the order request from the main website and print out labels in the warehouse which then got stuck on to the individual items in the order the labels were printed on stickers some were round and some were rectangular we had two special printers hooked up for this little things are about the size of label markers that took spools of stickers instead of trays of paper this is where all the fun happens my boss was a total douchebag he was supposed to be in a tech lead or technical manager type of role but his knowledge of technology was horrible stuff like we should just build the entire website in Perl or CGI like the ones I used to do translation I'm too dumb and all AZ to learn anything about new technologies his management skills weren't any better on the day he joined the company the first thing he said to us after mutual introductions was I used to work for the IRS so don't ever anger me or I'll ruin your life I still have back doors I put in there he kind of half acted like he was joking but seemed half serious as well he said this another time too out of the blue at some team lunch or something really weird and off-putting and highly unprofessional not to mention unethical and possibly illegal and no there's no way he had put in any backdoors he couldn't find his own backdoor with a mirror on a stick anyway my last project at that company was the label printing service I put in my two weeks notice around the time I started working on it because the awful boss had no planning skills he insisted that I just plan on doing the actual coding so I could get it done before I laughed he didn't want me to waste time on documentation or knowledge transfer it's a small system the other guys can figure it out if there are any problems we need to get it up and running ASAP okey dokey code only it is full compliance with mr. douchebags orders I get the first pass deployed with a couple of days to spare and spend most of that time tweaking and hardening air and trying to get some sort of documentation in place for the less obvious bits of air there wasn't much there when I laughed fast forward two weeks I'm at my new job and former coworker Tom calls me Tom hated the boss as much as I had but it turns out the boss had put him up to making the call hey hat the boss wants to ask you something do you have a minute I told him to put him on while wondering why the idiot didn't just call me himself presumably he thought I'd ignore him I wouldn't have partly because I try not to be a douche and partly out of morbid curiosity the douchebag boss was very polite to me as he had told me how the printers had just stopped working and asked if I had any idea what the problem might be needless to say I was gobsmacked I held back my snarky a thoughts and just reminded him politely that I don't work there anymore and without actually being on site to examine the system there was no way I could help anyway okay thanks anyway bye I found out later from Tom that the printers had been down for a few days and the awful boss was in a panic cursing my name to all and sundry one of his many stellar management qualities was an ability to go straight to yelling and trying to assign blame skipping straight past all that pesky focusing on went wrong and how to fix it B ass he actually went so far as to suggest I had deliberately sabotaged the system it turned out that the real root of the problem was that the print settings had just reverted or been reverted to the defaults so the software was running against the wrong paper size and in one case the wrong orientation one of the things I didn't document was that the print setup had to be configured specifically for the small round labels and the small rectangular 90-degree rotated labels I didn't document that because one I figured getting the paper size and orientation correct would be self-evident to anybody who would ever used a printer before and two did I mention the douchebag told me not to waste time on that frippery if you're wondering how incompetent tom must have been to not have found the problem sooner it's because the douchebag was riding herd on him to suss out where I had messed up the code I'm sure the notion occurred to him fairly early on but he wasn't given the chance to look there until later and even then the specifics probably wouldn't have been obvious so the guy basically said program this thing but don't document it for when you leave that just sounds like Murphy's Law is bound to happen hey everyone I hope you all had a really good day and that you enjoyed that video if you want to check out some of the videos then click on screen right now or check out the playlist down below if you enjoyed that video then please do leave a like and if you want to submit your own stories I think you can do so by joining the discord in the top link in the description but thank you so much for watching and I will see you very soon

Channel: Storytime

Views: 122,885

Rating: 4.8533049 out of 5

Keywords: reddit, r/, Storytime, r\, sub, subreddit, best of reddit, reddit top posts, episode, story, time, stories, reddit stories, reddit story, r/maliciouscompliance, r/idontworkherelady, r/prorevenge, r/choosingbeggars, ozmedia, redditor, rslash, Gio Films, mister x, darkfluff, malicious, compliance, maliciouscompliance, r/malicious, r/compliance, reddit maliciouscompliance, rslash maliciouscompliance

Id: pQ8ujzFPI0k

Length: 18min 39sec (1119 seconds)

Published: Fri Aug 02 2019