Rhiannon McGavin - "A Smile to Remember" & "Smile"

we had goldfish they circled around and around and the bowl on the table near the heavy drapes covering the picture window my mother always smiling wanting a soul to be happy to me be happy Henry she was right it's better to be happy if you can but my father continued to beat her and me several times a week while raging inside his six-foot-two frame because he couldn't understand what was attacking him for more then my mother poor fish wanting to be happy beaten two or three times a week telling me to be happy Henry smile why don't you ever smile and then she would smile to show me how and do is the saddest smile I ever saw one day the goldfish died all five of them they floated on the water on their sides their eyes still open and when my father got home from work he threw them to the cat there on the kitchen floor and we watched as my mother smiled people don't give girls enough credit I'm in the ninth grade now and the last time I studied a uniquely female narrative in English class was sixth grade that might not seem like a lot three years but it is difference between 12 and 15 between girl and we're reading To Kill a Mockingbird now and I was walking home one day thinking about how Dill's hair was described as duck fluff or how Scout viewed reading is breathing or what I'd help my mom make for dinner when I guess I was frowning a little deep in thought someone a man grown man told me to smile sweetheart odd isn't it telling some stranger to at least look happy you know it only takes one more muscle than smiling to punch someone in the teeth floods better than tears anyway action over thought thoughts left lingering wriggling through veins and vital organs trying to fight something you know is bigger than you the cudgel which is bludgeoned countless before because if there's no struggle you lose the cold and broken hallelujah of well at least you fought don't tell sad girls just smile don't tell sad girls to smile because she might be the type who gets cut by hip bones don't tell sad girls to smile because she might still be trying to scrub someone else's sin from her skin hot water holy water it all flows under the same bridge eventually and the dead can only feel cold so if she can feel the burning water then maybe maybe don't tell sad girls to smile because by allowing herself to feel happy she accepts that she knows the contrast too well and if she does want to smile then she does it for herself or someone she can be vulnerable with not some slack-jawed hand my fish I'd patriarchal nice guy who doesn't find a frown appealing she might have a good goddamn reason to be sad so don't you tell me to smile it is not your mouth it is not yours to consume to kiss to find comfort in when the windows rattle in a storm or your heart rattles in your rib cage like seeds in the dryer unable to grow without a little water and sunshine and tenderness and if you really want to girl to smile then you hold her until you're drenched and perfume from the gardens you've planted in her heart so that every time her wounds reopened she bleeds bouquets but I am not yours to hold and if you keep walking around down sad girls a smile no one will ever want to be and if you come any closer I'll bite you and smile read give it up for laksa

Channel: Get Lit - Words Ignite

Views: 84,454

Keywords: Getlit, getlitorg, getlitwordsignite, get lit, getlitpoet, literaryriot, literary riot, spoken word, spokenword, poetry, poets, poet, classicslam, slam poetry, slampoetry, classic slam, youth, empowerment, mental health, community, learning, education, opportunity, connections, justice, equal rights, equalrights, literacy, arts, mindfulness, history

Id: eg89hSMe9Wo

Length: 4min 6sec (246 seconds)

Published: Thu Jun 13 2013