r/Choosingbeggars "TELL ME YOUR NAME SO I CAN SUE YOU!" Funny Reddit Posts

welcome to RS last using beggars where people actually ask you to help them destroy your life hey guitar still available yep if you have any questions I'd be happy to answer them for you yeah is the price firm pretty much this is already the cheapest American Standard being advertised here and none of the others in this price range have locking tuners having said that if you're a serious buyer I might have a little wiggle room what did you have in mind can I have it for 400 casts cash I'm asking $1,200 yeah and I'm offering 400 take it or leave it no sorry $1,200 is a really fair price that's for the guitar hard case and all the case candy Plus free shipping within Canada I can't knock $800 off by a little wiggle room I was thinking maybe I could let it go for 1,100 or something also if you're displa location is correct we're about 2,000 kilometers apart unless you're willing to drive 20-plus hours to get here we can't do a cash deal any sale would have to be done by a paypal if paypal stupid crooks I've only got 500 and I would have to get it set up and buy new strings so I can only offer 400 why the F what I want candy are you for real just sell me the guitar if I want candy I'll go to the store not candy Lowell case candy it's an expression used to describe all the goodies that the manufacturers throw in the case when you buy a new guitar in this case it means the trim arm the user manual warranty a fender sticker the hash tags etc also I had the guitar professionally set up before posting it for sale and it has brand-new strings on it Ernie vault ends so you don't need to worry about any other added expenses whatever it's for my son 1100 is still too much for kids guitar 425 cash an American standard really isn't a kid's guitar if your budget is in the 400 to 500 range you should check out Squire strats the classic vibe and vintage modified models are really really good guitars and I think go for around $500 news so you could probably find a nice used one for 400 maybe even less hey [ __ ] if I wanted y're I'd look for Squire my son wants a fender not a Epping Squire okay well this fender is selling for $1,200 not for 25 if you're selling it you don't need it 450 final offer no sorry 475 final offer sorry I can't sell it for anywhere near that price it's for my son why are you being so greedy I'm going to buy your guitar but you have to deal offering 475 for a $1200 guitar isn't within the realm of dealing can't you just give me a break it's for my son and he really wants this guitar and to be honest calling me a [ __ ] seriously stop using that word it isn't cool and swearing at me when I was only trying to be helpful doesn't make me want to deal with you a break maybe but a $725 break not a chance you're wasting my time Oh freak you're a social warrior justice guitar player I thought only men play guitars I think you means social justice warrior and guitars are played by everyone Annie Clark is one of the best guitar players in the world and any event clearly this isn't going anywhere good luck in your search never heard of her I wonder why if she is so great 500 take it or leave it I'll leave it and then some time passes as we move on to part 2 guitar still available no sorry it just sold a couple of days ago I pulled the ad after the sale but apparently if it's in your cash it will still show up on the website if you search for it how much did it go for 1,200 bucks I'm going to sue you huh we had a contract what are you talking about are you sure you're talking to the right person yes [ __ ] I'm sure we had a contract and you broke it I don't know what you're talking about and really think you have me confused for someone else I was selling the red strat American Standard I know [ __ ] boy you are [ __ ] what contract are you talking about I said that I was going to buy your guitar that's a verbal contract and you sold it to someone else which broke the contract and now I'm going to sue you laughs now [ __ ] because the judge is going to make you cry you broke the law and now you're going to pay honest question are you okay you're not really making sense go get me that guitar and sell it for me for five hundred like we agreed or I'll sue you hurry up [ __ ] the guitar has been sold we didn't have a contract and you had no grounds for a lawsuit no I said I was going to buy your guitar that's a verbal contract you owe me that guitar also it was for my son and you knew that and when he didn't get it after I promised him he cried that's emotional distress damages and you have to pay for that too big bucks I'm sorry that your son is upset but you shouldn't have promised him the guitar if you weren't willing to pay for it once again though we didn't have a contract and it's not my fault that you disappointed your son I suspect he's used to that though now that's slander keep digging your hole [ __ ] you're hilarious but unfortunately I don't have any more time to waste on you have a nice day give me your name and address so my lawyer can contact you to sue you no that's obstruction of justice keep digging butthole have a nice day I love the end of that conversation I'm going to ruin your life but in order to do so I really need you to cooperate with me so could you please give me all of your information so I can ruin your life hey blink long time no speak hi yeah it's been a while I hope you've been doing well I saw your post about needing a laptop for classes I have an old one you could use if you want oh really thank you so much what kind is it it's an Acer it has Windows 8 on it and it's only a few years old I recently bought a new Mac so I don't need it anymore oh thanks but I actually need a Mac since I'm in art school and all art school that's cool you always were really I do have an older 2011-2012 MacBook Pro that you could have it just has a small hairline crack in the screen but it's barely noticeable otherwise the screen is perfect I could meet you at the mall if you'd like to grab it from me sometime thanks but I can't use a cracked laptop could you help me buy a new one or let me use yours for a few semesters sorry I actually need that for software development so I unfortunately can't just give it away the older Mac isn't really cracked like I said it has a small hairline fracture that's barely noticeable but again if you really need a laptop I would be glad to give you the Acer or older Mac well I guess if you're gonna be like that I could take the older two and sell them to be able to buy a new one when could you meet I'm sorry I didn't give you permission to sell my laptops you can use them for your studies if you want and return them after Wow so rude I can't believe you're not just going to give me your brand-new laptop the least you could do is let me pause so I could buy a new laptop for myself Wow some people are so selfish hello are you still selling the razor blade 15 yes do you want to buy it yeah is it available at a hundred and fifty dollars no the price is negotiable but it should be in the $1,500 range the original price is in my post is your name Sheldon yes why bro my name's also Sheldon be cool man and lower it at 150 it's just 10% off one it is 10% of the original price not 10% off - just because we have the same name I do not owe you anything 3 your account says that your name is Mark I think this mark fellow might be the laziest choosing beggar we have seen so far selling panasonic compact stereo systems 75 bucks would you consider free for us coming from Peterborough wanna get this for my special needs nephew for his birthday please hi Lisa I'm so sorry but unfortunately I can't give this away for free this is my sister stereo that I'm selling for her she's pregnant and can use all the money she could get really sorry though if you can't afford a kid keep your legs closed this choosing beggar doesn't have enough money to get a gift for her kid so she criticizes a pregnant woman for not having enough money for her kid right so the context for this next one is that Opie reached out to an old acquaintance and asked them if they wanted to go get coffee what you trying to talk about I don't just grab coffee like that with dudes unless I'm paid I am struggling financially can you help me out I am off doing other things trying to make a living I can sit down for coffee if you can give me $300 Wow that's the wildest thing I've ever been told the answer is no Coolio man forget being a professional youtuber this job is where it's at three hundred bucks just to sit down and drink coffee screw this I want to be a professional coffee drinker hey bro you good man yeah yeah you still have that pool table yeah why basically a few of my bros wanna play some pool around 9:00 p.m. can we come to yours like six of us I don't think so man my parents are in I don't want them to be disturbed come on man your pool table is in your garage they can go upstairs yeah I don't think so oh come on bro I saw you had mad Dan and Drago over last week those are my friends I don't know who your friends are we haven't spoke in months and you randomly want to come play pool at my house and I know what you're like you'll trash up the place to F sake man me and my guys want to come play a few games and drink a couple beers why are you acting like a wussy hello reply whoa okay if you don't reply we'll come anyway I dare you why yes officer these are the men who broke into my house and here's a written confession from them on my phone please arrest them thank you so much hi is the CRV still available sorry it sold for how much 700 bucks I would pay 500 for it may I have it I am serious I need a car so you want me to get a sold car back and give it to you for less than I sold it for yes I need a car hi is the harness still available I think someone is coming to pick them up and waiting on a text back we'll let you know if I don't hear back okay but it's for my kids dog I already kind of told her she could have it ha ha why would you do that do what tell your kids she can have the harnesses because you said they were free they are free to the first person who wanted to come pick them up someone else asked before you that's not fair I already told her she can have them for her dog look just I don't know why you did that but if I don't hear back from the guy in the next 10 minutes you can have them okay seven minutes later so okay your daughter can have them where do you want to meet I live at blank but if you want to do public there's a McDonald's nearby at blank I can meet you in the car park there how am I supposed to get there I don't know the advert literally said for someone to collect I don't have a car you can come to me or I'll give them to the next person I don't have time for this but I've hurt my ankle and can't drive I don't have a car what are you expecting me to do I'm giving away two dog harnesses for free if you can't pick them up then why did you message me you could get a taxi hello hello she's crying now yeah something tells me that poor little girl never got those dog harnesses it was great watching blinkin bling today I enjoyed them do you mind if I swing by tomorrow at 2 p.m. to collect the money I wasn't aware payment was involved you got free ice cream and a day of fun I'm sorry for the misinterpretation um we discussed payment of 16 bucks an hour beforehand over text I'm sorry could you show me those texts great see you then 16 hours sound fair perfect I'm looking forward to working with them I'm excited Blanc seems to have a knack for you go easy on him haha I will thank you so much for this opportunity of course call or text if you have any questions I delete my message is often I'm sorry but as much as I love seeing your kids I am doing this for payment exclusively well you're acting kind of stuck-up aren't you can we compromise it $20 no I watched your kids for eight hours and we agreed on sixteen an hour 128 is the total I am not paying you 128 for a single day they're easy kids it's not a discussion of that you promised and I have textbooks to pay for please I would accept a hundred absolutely not I wish I didn't have such a stuck-up grunt watching my kids I am going to block you now please do not contact me again are you serious you know this sounds like a delusional choosing beggar but I almost have to wonder if this is just a super savvy way of saving money basically you just get a friend to watch your kids and then pretend to have a fight with them block them and bam free babysitter I mean it cost you a friend but who cares choosing beggars don't really care about friends anyways free armchair free there's another guy offering an armchair and a coffee table for free on here do you have anything you could sweeten the pot with to make it worth my while Thanks I could knock half off the asking price half off of $0 that's practically a fortune that was are slashed using beggars and be sure to subscribe to my channel because if you don't I'll sue you and in that case please send me your name and address so that I can sue you thanks I'd really appreciate it

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Views: 848,237

Rating: 4.9307337 out of 5

Keywords: reddit, r/, rslash, r\, sub, subreddit, best of reddit, reddit top posts, top posts, top posts of all times, funniest posts, funny, comedy, funniest reddit posts, funny reddit posts, funny reddit, fails, cringe, choosingbeggars, beggar, r/choosingbeggars, choosing beggar, choosing

Id: CEriMloYJ8A

Length: 15min 11sec (911 seconds)

Published: Wed Mar 13 2019