PAIN TOLERANCE & TRUST ISSUES || Battle Ready - S03E21

[Applause] [Music] [Applause] [Music] [Applause] [Music] hi my name is aaron mcmanus welcome to the battle ready podcast i am here with my father now why do you always call me father i'm your dad you're my dad but it's like a father's son thing you know all right well i'm irwin mcmanus and it's good to see you my son it's good to see you dad so we we who is we we as in you we're a little controversial on our podcast that released on tuesday well it's interesting to me that when i just lay out different um perspectives or possibilities that that sometimes people feel anxious because it it feels as if i might be indicting their particular view of the world or their political positions and and really i was just saying here are some things that we should pay attention to because this could be a cautionary tale and uh so we dropped this really fun podcast as battle ready on the end of democracy and i just wanted to throw out the you know a conversation that maybe in two three five years we might want to look back and go hey guys there were signs have you ever had something happen then you look back and you realize there were signs that warned you but you didn't pay attention to the science yeah pretty much like every relationship i've ever been in what oh that's a that's it that's a different episode but that would be a really good episode it would be a really good episode that i hope we never get to and but uh and so i i felt for me and i guess i kind of drove that particular conversation it was important to talk about you were driving and i was hanging out in the back of the truck going please someone get him to stop the car and but i i just think sometimes it's important to say things that it feels like it's we don't have permission to say okay and so i just wanted to bring out a few things and and i'm a person that really loves my freedom and i um i also believe that given the opportunity i can create a life in a world that is better than one can be created for me by other people okay and uh and and i just want to see that opportunity given to as many people as possible in this world i do find it interesting because this is kind of like a new page new chapter new book almost a new volume in in in your life because one you're not very you're you're you're not very political you you stay kind of apolitical but you do think and you think deeply and you think very intelligently and you have opinions and we we the camera turned off and we're walking out and he goes whoever wins i'm gonna start breaking down their policies as well whether it's the left or the right and i just was and i just was mind blown because you have this ability to place yourself as a democrat or as a republican or as a libertarian or as an independent and you can destroy an argument and you can rebuild an argument and you can help someone realize like the fallacies in their own perspectives and it's really fascinating because i don't have that ability quite yet well one battle ready for me has created a new platform okay like i would never talk on sunday mornings about the things we talk about on battle ready no so it's almost like i put on a different hat but we have gotten kind of in trouble for that a little bit because people have maybe it's mixed or the lines have been a little blurred yeah and people go how come you don't talk about jesus more and for me is it uh that's that's really not the intent of that already right um and then and i i don't feel i i'm not saying you're quoting the bible here at that already that's not what battle ready is we have talked about the bible yeah and so uh whenever it's relevant to the conversation i i you know you bring it in probably more than i do the bible yeah yeah and then i still really need it yeah but even if i'm not talking about jesus my relationship with jesus informs everything in my life yes but i would never hold jesus accountable for my economic views or a lot of or maybe some of my um you know so jesus will be simple about that give back to rome with his realms yeah and and so i but i but i i you know my you know your mom um kim yeah she's your wife my wife kim she's a little nervous you know about me doing things like this mariah's a little nervous too yeah we're making the the women in our family system a little nervous well they make me nervous almost every day of my life so but it's nice to me part of what i taller says it's like a script it just gets so boring living your life in the construct of a pastor where people only want you to talk about certain things and i i just thought it would be so nice to have a platform not not advocating a particular position because um the controversy i create is not about choosing a particular position it's about just raising particular questions this is something that i love about you you you think freely and it's something very special and very unique because a lot of people don't and i think that's the thing you want for people the most other than to to have a relationship with jesus and to one to just live a good life and be a great person you definitely want people to not be confined to a political party or to a social construct or to a class system but to challenge everything and this is what i'm saying and this is what i was saying is that i grew up on personality tests i was your guinea pig i went through the myers-briggs at like seven years old like dad why am i taking this test a little too early there's the sats i did i did the burkman i did the strength finders i was trained to train people in all of these things at 19 years old i was consulting with like businessmen in south africa i was very confused of what my life um trajectory was but you know now people take the enneagram and and and i'm an eight i'm very i'm very challenge oriented and you are too you're not an eight but you're but you are challenge oriented but you're very kind about the way that you do it and you're a little subversive as well so like is this like a fun uh is this a fun space for you to actually get to like kind of build and break down and to kind of yes if you're if you're if you're familiar with the enneagram i guess i'm a 5. and uh but honestly the christian culture doesn't have a lot of room for fives why tell me about fives i don't really like pay attention i always send friends the test because i'm always just curious i think it's a great like conversation starter but yeah tell me about a five i don't really know what you're about at five there's no i'm sure you know a lot about me they know a lot about you okay and i just think that i question everything that um ideas are the playground which i feel most comfortable playing in and and so i i feel like on sunday i talk about convictions the convictions of who jesus is what the scriptures say about how to live your life and the humanity we can become and how god designs us for this life and uh and i and i i take that really seriously i see that as like a sacred trust yeah and battle ready is where i feel like i have permission to talk about everything i don't know i'm not sure about um and that i just want to think about and talk about and and look you can be a republican and a democrat or a democrat and do good in the world and you can be i think people need to like res receive that let that sink into your that that people can be in an opposite political party as you and still be achieving goodness in the world and i don't know if people get that i think i i think they think republicans think that democrats can do no good and the democrats think that republicans can't do any good but there's also a class warfare that's emerging and the the narrative right now is that anybody with any wealth is evil and what's interesting to me is i have a friend who began in extreme poverty actually comes from south america from colombia his family was involved in uh the colombian drug cartel and uh you know his father and you know went to federal prison he tells the story and he does it publicly yeah okay yeah you're making me nervous no no i know i made you know no i've heard him share okay and and he had to take care of his family from his teenage hey you know uh years and and they were struggling in in poverty in south l.a area i think southgate down he's somewhere down there and and out of really out of ruins built a multi-million dollar company where you know now you're talking you know probably a corporate wealth of 100 million dollars and he makes decisions that could expand the company to 250 million and he just dramatically different life stage and one thing he said to me the other day because he is very driven and he's not finished i mean i i think he's going to create business structures that will probably eventually hit a billion dollars and he said i want to prove that you can have wealth and be good and do good and he said that with such passion and earnestness and i thought how refreshing because he said it in such a way where i believed him and i'm like oh i'm going to cheer you on i hope you end up making 10 billion and just become an example of what a good human being who has 10 billion dollars looks like yeah and um and i i just don't want to create a class warfare where poverty is the proof of goodness and wealth is the proof of evil i've you know i mean i've spent over a decade of my life working with urban poor and i can tell you there are really good people who are poor i can also tell they're really bad people who are poor and and i have some my life with many people who are worth billions and i can tell you they're billionaires who are really good people and billionaires who are really um destructive people it has nothing to do with the money you have has to do with the you know the essence of your character so anyway that's where we were coming out of that podcast but i want to talk about something a little bit different today if that's okay it's totally okay let's do it because right now i'm um a lot of my thinking is centralized around pain okay and 2020 has been a year of injuries for me from 15 stitches in my face for where i in a paddle tennis match yeah and i went flying forward and the paddle hit the ground and bounced up and ricocheted to my face right under my eye and i i like confession there i hit i am the one who hit the ball in your direction and i scored and i was celebrating and you thought i was faking when i was like on the ground why did when i nah come on when i yeah you're little you're not dramatic but if there were oscars for injuries you would be nominated and so i was nervous when i turned around and mariah was running to you and i'm like is he okay because i scored in nothing had happened you just missed it and you were like i didn't know i was bleeding until i saw mariah's face yes and then about seven hours later like covered in blood yeah on a trip in mexico i was i was very nervous and then i was like let's get out of here there's no way you're getting your face stitched up in in in this little town you gotta shout out to the mexican surgeon she was brilliant and she was brilliant she was nice grateful for how she creates a minimal scar you literally cannot see it now so anyway from that to a week later playing basketball and hearing my knee explode and then having knee surgery a week after that going through five weeks of recovery with the knee surgery and then spinning out on my electric bicycle and electric bike on a hard right turn and crashed and tore ligaments in my ankle two weeks or messed up after the other day yeah two weeks a week after the surgery or a week after i played basketball five weeks of surgery and then you see what i have my right rotator cuff that i tore before okay and so that was now the last the pain for the last month and a half and then finally went back and played basketball again and one of my friends didn't see me ran full speed caught me from behind in the shoulder separated my shoulder tore her in whatever the ac ligament and um and i'm in so much pain and then me like a dummy this morning goes to hug him as he walks into the door cause you you reached in this is the thing you reached in i go to grab him and he just like yelps and i just immediately you you know you'd think that you would feel empathy i would felt anger like why did you let me hug you if you if you're injured and i forgot and because you also carry pain very well and i think that's something we should talk about as well you carry pain very well that's part we're going to talk about as if no one notices i'm one of the few people who can notice and and i wasn't you walked in fine you you looked great you had shirt on like you had like a obviously i had a shirt i was like okay if he was that injured he wouldn't be able to put clothes on like this and then i hurt you and i was mad at you and then i apologized and now we're here but and the reason i bring this up is because uh when i had the knee surgery the very next day i went into um i keep calling it rehab and everybody keeps saying please don't call it rehab because in la it just has a different meaning yeah i've been going to physical therapy to pt yeah and when you go to pt they tell you the first thing we do is work on range of motion and when i had the knee surgery went in i had 100 range of motion so they said well this is what we usually spend the first few months on so now we can just move on to strength because you have 100 range of motion i remember when i tore my rotator cuff and they said you know you're in danger of frozen shoulder except that instantly i had 100 range of motion so when i tore separate the shoulder i went in again uh yesterday to um surgeon or doctor to get an x-ray mri to make sure your shoulder wasn't broken because they thought it might be the bone was bruised so that might be broken so yeah and uh he goes hey let's you know we have to work on the range of motion i said no i have 100 range of motion and i show them i i can i can move anywhere i want it's just about pain tolerance and one of things i realize is that the great danger when you have an injury is the loss of range of motion and it's not about your body's inability to move it is about your inability to press beyond the point of pain and one of the reasons i heal really fast is because of my relationship to pain and i think that this is true not just physically it's true emotionally for people and relationally and psychologically and in the whole spectrum of spiritually you're going to have a dramatic pause i mean it's your show right now it's your show this week's been your week it's your show if you want pushback just let me know i'm right here how do you think you relate to pain how do i relate to pain i let's talk about your relationship to pain for a minute because i do think that at at times i've become so callous to certain types of pain that i am not aware of the damage i'm doing to my own self i would say that mine would maybe be more emotional and spiritual relational and yours would be physical that you've damaged your body so much that when it gets hurt again you you don't have a proper gauge for pain and i think that can actually happen in our spiritual lives and our personal lives where we go in our relation relational lives we've damaged ourselves so much that we don't have that proper gauge to know when to call it to know when to end to know when to go okay this isn't giving up this is me being smart and pacing myself are you preaching at me on using battle ready as the format do you feel something in your heart deep down i feel like there's something else going on here because the first question kim asked me is so are you gonna play basketball again in other words have you learned anything and i looked and i said of course i'm going to play basketball again as soon as i can and this is why you married me this is why you love me this is who i am and being 62 isn't going to change that and and i know that you guys would like for me to to reconsider my relationship to physical or athletic experiences i would like for you to consider and to reconsider a lot of things if we're starting with your body in pain i did call you and say is it time for us to pick up golf and you're like my between the two of us we have really bad shoulder injuries you're like i think we'll both die if we want to go off it'll be the most painful experience for us and i'm not good at golf you're you're i i'm sure you're actually we've played once time together i think i literally passed out because i had a shoulder injury and my rotator cuff tour retour and i had a pinched nerve and i dropped he blacked out i blacked out because the pain was so bad at the driving i was in college at the driving range so we were prepping to play beverly i think the beverly like i didn't know it was dangerous and i dropped and i and i don't think it's super funny actually and i've played since i've played with my brother-in-law jake goss and and i'm not very good i i'm not very good but anyways but i think this is an important conversation because um in fact my brother had sent me this um story about a navy seal a guy who grew up and he was like the weakest guy and he was like the the geek and you know the 50-pound weakling and now he's became one of the top navy seals in the world and he actually told me he actually was extremely overweight i think yeah that was his whole thing it was actually he was actually he was the nerdy guy but he was overweight okay and then yeah no cause you told me this i remember you told me after you talked to alex and that he was like not eating well he's super out of shape could couldn't run a mile all of these things and he told himself like i'm gonna like i'm literally gonna die like i'm on a path to like self-destruct if i do not change something and then you and then i guess there's like this crazy path of like how he became one of the top navy seals becomes an elite navy seal and he talks about it's all about the relationship with pain and the reason my brother sent me that is because i was talking to him about um now one of the things i've seen over a lifetime is i have an unusual relationship to pain and that i never see pain as the limit of my capacity and i love the fact that i went into this uh medical office and it's been six years since i've been there and when they saw me they said ah you're the guy who heals so fast wow and i love having the reputation and uh you're an e-surgeon it was at your knees yeah yeah and i i wanted to throw out this thing this possibility that this idea that everything in life has the potential to create pain and how you relate to that pain will either limit your future or or prepare you for that future that let's say for instance like injuries if you can deal with the pain you can recover and regain full use may become stronger than ever before in a relationship if you love and then you have heart if you're heartbroken and you love and your heart broken that pain can actually limit your capacity to love because it limits your your willingness to trust and so that pain becomes a limitation and it instead of instead of becoming the material to build your future it becomes the material that limits your future in the same way in a business environment if you start a company you start a business and you fail you lose a little bit of money or a lot of money it doesn't go well and it seems a lot of times whenever you start a business you end up with haters around you who are going to tell you you're going to fail and then when you do it just reinforces that narrative and if you let that pain become the boundary of your future you may never risk this or another company again you may never risk another venture again and so i want to just throw out this this idea that pain can become a self-limiting boundary that keeps you from living optimally the life that you could live that's so good i'm just going to give some silence so brian can cut that into a great clip and i think i think there was moments in my life even with you working together where i mean i said this on when we recorded the last podcast which was monday and it released tuesday that there are some days i just do not want to show up and that's everyone i understand that i have a harder time admitting that i think sometimes because it's family and because it's obviously something that we care about and we've built so much but i don't know if if people and not that now that this is ominous people but i don't know if people really understand maybe how tolling a how big the toll or the was it how did yeah how heavy the total heavy the toll would be for some of the things that we do and the criticism and some days it's fine and sometimes i love it some days i'm like you know i say this and we were watching the world series we're getting critiqued and i hid it from your instagram because i didn't want you to deal with it i'm sure joe saw it but he had already left the the world series party thing that we were at and and then i i just woke up the next morning and i was like that that guy didn't offset me but there was stuff in in just in work where i was just like i just today i'm good like today i want to find a new job and move on and do something else and have anonymity and live on an island somewhere and surf every day eat tacos and and write books and under a pseudonym um the true american dream uh but but i you know we keep showing up and i know that when you you're starting a company right now which is pretty exciting and we're keeping it pretty quiet we've talked about it a little bit we've referred to it but you're starting company right now so maybe in the next month we'll do a podcast and i'll unveil two weeks probably what i'm doing yeah oh yeah two weeks until we can talk about it or maybe a month yeah right because i think we're going to do all the content for you but right now i just want to celebrate what you're doing well i'm making an appointment we started a company together 10 years ago maybe 12 years ago now you started it i was still in college when i left college i came and worked for you um worked with you for off and on for a very long time and we lost that company due to just bad business partners it was just a bad season the company was becoming very successful it was turning a profit we were in the black which was actually really incredible yeah we were doing really well within three and a half years and there was like five companies underneath an umbrella like it wasn't just one company it was there was a few different projects and it was really exciting and then when you but losing it was devastating yeah you know lost everything i had you had you lost a lot of things but you have an incredible ability to land on your feet you have an incredible ability also to to write a book and to go and speak and to do all these amazing consulting things and and you're just dynamic you know when i was 23 years old there wasn't a lot i was good at right and so i was still trying to figure out my way in the world so now i'm 32 this is almost exactly 10 years later you're starting another company and it gave me so much anxiety like i didn't actually even want to talk to you about it for the first probably three months that you were working on it you kept telling me i'm working on this project i'm working on this project i built this team i want you to help me when she'll help me and i'm like no i like do you remember that i just i physically could not take the anxiety that it was bringing to my life because i didn't want to lose something again you didn't want me to go back into this no it's not that i yeah no i didn't want you 100 i was like please don't please don't do it to us again i know i finally had to decide to go do it anyway yeah and then the moment i started doing it then you jumped right in to help yeah so here we are again working on your next collection and oh dang i said something um can you delete me out don't cut that just everybody listening that was it wipe that out your mind yeah wipe it out of your mind uh your next project and and i feel the ramifications of like a ghost pain of that pain that was 10 years ago and i and i feel it now even with building pagan even with building bad already even the things like sometimes it's hard to build something for me to know that i'm going to lose it and that's something for you that you just really have like that is the difference in in me and you and between us when i get hurt i can be very resilient like physically hurt i can be very resilient because i don't know if i have that much self-worth in my physicality i value being healthy i value looking good but if i break something i keep going you know if i get that's because you're raised with a mother and a father who probably have zero empathy for injury i remember it's broken get up you have another leg i remember yeah i i've definitely had a few concussions i've definitely had a few face injuries where i was bleeding all over the place and mom was like so you're good walk yourself to the car put a towel on your head and we'll go to the hospital stages you'll be fine you know it is what it is but i do think that um how do you how do we handle we handle things very differently but how do we how do we get past those moments in our lives where we remember so vividly the pain that we've experienced how do you forget like it feels like you almost forget like you actually do you actually forget people that have like been mean to you because i've seen you do it on planes where i'm like this guy's sitting next to you oh my gosh and they'll be like hey did you remember me and you're like no it's like remind me you don't even do it meanly how do you forget so easily it's a i one i think it might be a defense mechanism something going on in germany it's really odd you know everybody has issues but control delete but i definitely don't have a bitterness issue like you don't i just don't ever feel bitterness toward anyone matter how horrific they were and i've got like a ledger like wait what's your name again let me just go through holland did something happen is there is there a skull by your name is there three okay three x's you're out and i i'm not sure what happens one is that i i i never feel like anyone is more powerful in creating my future than me so no matter what anyone else does i never have a mindset that they just stole my future from me so is that something in me that i need to change yes could we make this a quotable absolutely 100 i got something in me i need to change and you said yes okay but let's break it down because i think yes because um what bitterness sets in when you feel someone has wrongly taken something from you but they did like that isn't that is something that we still argue about 10 years ago they took something from us yes and i lost a multi-million dollar company because of unethical decisions a business partner made yes and i don't know if we're allowed to talk about we can't because we never sign anything just like we don't say names yeah but we i forget frustrated because like to me i was like let's sue him yes i know and i even had counsel from i mean really thoughtful christian leaders who said you need this you need you need to sue them bad like forever like everything and and i did not and it's and it bothers me and it was hard for you that i refused to fight for when we were losing everything yeah and for the wrong that they did and and i think the reason is because i just i've never been afraid of having nothing because i always believe i can create something but do you ever feel like you project your ability to create something out of nothing on other people like i was definitely 23 being like yo i got i have like really nothing like my nothing's really nothing like i'm in the negative now like i don't know if i can get back out and you know what i mean and yes i did project that on other people throughout my life okay because i've never thought of myself as better than anyone or more gifted than anyone or more talented or more intelligent than anyone so i always work from the assumption that anything i could do anyone else in the world could do i've come to realize that people are different do you feel like that's okay keep going no no i'm different and i and and that not everyone has the same generative capacity okay and so now i understand it more as a stewardship okay and so i look at something i go oh wow if i if i take this risk and step into this courageously and creatively i could employ ten more people by starting this business and i see that as a part of my stewardship right yeah i actually do think creating jobs is a part of my social responsibility because i'm capable of that now not everyone's capable of creating work for other people yeah some people the best they can do is getting get a good job and do a great job right but if you have the capacity to create wealth if you have the capacity to create work i think you have a moral obligation to do that so that other people can find their right place in that space you've created right so i i see it that way okay and so i think the first thing is i try not to i ever hold on to bitterness i don't even try not to i just don't hold on to bitterness right and a lot of is i don't um i don't give that person the power for my future like okay i just lost something really significant and it took me a while i mean i i probably lost 25 pounds when i lost the company you probably lost 25 million i lost a lot of money i lost a pound per million and i couldn't eat for almost a month i couldn't hold down food we fasted but i don't know if it was a fast or if it was a we ended up with the fast the first 10 days i just couldn't hold down food and then after that we decided let's make it an intentional fast and went for a month we went for about yeah i don't want it i think you went for six weeks maybe for longer yeah maybe six weeks so a month i remember i was in new york and i was like i think i'm gonna eat it was like a sunday night and i was like i didn't even have dinner tonight yeah i think i at least went to 40 days yeah fasting which was interesting because i was like barely a christian like barely found my faith and i was like still a mess and i was fasting and i was like i don't understand why i'm doing this but my but we're doing this and so and i'm hungry and and but but it was like a transform transformative time yeah and and for me that fasting was about and that's a sketch wiping away the past so that i could step into the future and you have to let go of the past to take a hold of your future and that's where you have to and there's something about pain you know every great athlete has a um a dysfunctional relationship to pain because eventually the pain becomes addictive and that addictive pain moves you to greatness and so part of the reason i wanted to create this new company that i'm creating and do these new projects is that i've i've held on to material for 10 years that i had when i was working before in the um in the fashion industry and kim wanted me to get rid of it or sell it or do something and i just had it in a warehouse for 10 years because i said one day i'm going to redeem what was lost and so there's there's this little thing inside of me that i like to call resilience could be stubbornness where if the story doesn't end well i refuse to let it be the last chapter of the story i all know that that pain will be wasted if i don't take that pain and give it a a better ending i want to give it a heroic narrative and so if you could just see pain as the material from which you can tell your better story you know or you can actually elevate so you're saying is the last 10 years was our christian bale and batman begins when we're in like the mountains in china or no no not in china i guess too bad tibet yeah yeah working and we're becoming whether it's china or not is politically questionable so we are i don't want to get into that we are so we are going through it would you say the last 10 years was a desert season for us like and i mean that by like we were just kind of wandering through the desert because i don't feel like that i feel like no we've accomplished so much good yeah i feel like i've we just buried myself we channeled the energy different way so it's interesting is when uh i stepped away from the business world i stepped full force into mosaic we watched amazing things happen we ended up getting location here on hollywood boulevard you went from 30 to 3 000 people within how it was like a blink of an eye yeah but like actually like how long you went um we went from 300 people to almost 13 000 in 10 years yeah and so that was a like i'm just you i'm using the eastern number yes we had 300 on easter that was that was our high big attend that was our bragging number yeah you know and not not the other sundays where i was just talking to empty space but um it's pretty amazing how that has happened and and so a part of a part of for me is your relationship to pain needs to be uh first of all realizing it can become a psychological barrier of your limitations and whether it's in love or in business or whether it's your physical limitation or emotional limitation and it's just like with trust you you cannot be effective in life without trust and you and i we talked about this i'm i'm fast to trust you're pretty slow non-existent or if i just tolerate but you asked you asked me a great question a month ago about collaboration when did i learn how to collaborate or when did i commit to collaboration and a huge part of collaboration is trust you cannot collaborate effectively if you don't trust people and and i think a huge part of my success has been i've decided that the world works better when you have trust in abundance and if you trust people i i trust people without it being earned and so of course there'll be betrayal of course there'll be disappointment but i would rather trust everyone and be disappointed with some then trust no one and literally write everyone off and you cannot be able to try it sometime it's kind of nice no you know where it's not nice you don't trust you and you don't ever have an intimate relationship yeah yeah you don't trust you never know love at its deepest level you don't trust you'll never achieve your economic or business potential if you don't trust you'll never walk with god at the depth of your spiritual journey that you were created for without trust your future is lost before we close i'm going to grill you just a little bit sure you're a person who struggles with trust is that a yes yep okay i know you just you have to trust me from it okay all right so when you ever have a situation where you don't trust one but you need you need to trust them i don't really put myself in situations where i have to trust people yes you do i'm going to push back no i do but i feel like a lot of the times i'm in the i'm in control where i feel like i put myself in the position where i'm in control do you feel like that limits your life so instead of it being trust there is to a degree a trust in that i helping trying to empower people's talents you do do that i do you actually trust a lot of people but that's also because i think internally maybe a thing that people don't know about me i'm actually a big fan of people you are a huge fan yeah yeah and so i'm like maybe i don't trust them but it's not even about trust it's like i just like them as people yeah i think that you're actually your area where you struggle with trust is interpersonal in your private world probably but you are very trusting in your professional world you build teams you empower people yeah you elevate people and you love putting people on a platform that was actually offered to you yes okay so trust is a thing i'm working on i do i someone asked me i didn't know i asked this question to people and i asked this question um someone recently i can't remember who was i said what is the question i like to ask people that i just meet um what's your greatest weakness and someone responded to me very interestingly um why would i tell you that such a great answer it's such a good answer that's that's the right answer is the right answer but i do i love it and i and i and i like sat and i was like why would you tell me that and it was because you'd use it against me it's i don't know it's such an interesting idea right that'd be funny somebody said it was uh of my greatest weaknesses i'm way too transparent to tell every everybody everything that's wrong with me i feel like it's better to tell people where where to look instead of them finding it and being like whoa what this was here the whole time and like no i was there from the beginning so i'm going to ask you and uh cut you avoided it so i'm going to ask you another question okay i didn't avoid it you didn't avoid it but you didn't answer it and which what what did i answer i what uh have you ever not trusted someone but you had to trust them you needed to trust them you obviously know the answers so the reason i'm asking you is because you can't say thank god you can't successfully i don't want to but i have to because okay you started pagan with a couple of friends right yes all of you have some experience and none of you have enough experience right so you have to trust each other even though but i don't but i don't but okay okay okay i'm not gonna i'm not gonna go out and say i don't trust matt and eric i do trust matt and eric with with um like my best intention like they're always gonna have my best intention right but i don't trust them to to do it if i can do it or can you see how limiting that could be in life well but this but also that's not true because like they both handle like they definitely do both handle so much of what they have to take care of for the company so you have to find people that you trust in their character you mean i do trust them then can you do that yes yeah you see that's what's going to fight that this sometimes you you you know that a person maybe isn't full of the competencies necessary they're going to mess up but neither am i right but you trust each other's characters so you know you're always going to have the best intention and best motivation right because i think sometimes it flips around because when you don't trust people guess what really is happening what's happening you don't trust yourself and so well thanks for listening to the battle ready podcast and so yeah i'm gonna go to therapy now so you end up living a life of insecurity okay you end up living a life of self-doubt and you end up living a life where you're closed to opportunities and emotions and experiences is anybody else hot in here i'm hot i'm hot so here's the thing how you trust others is the best mirror to your healthy relationship of whether you trust yourself and that's all the time we have for today folks and we gotta stop this in front of everybody which is a good 360 because we started talking about pain yes and then we started talking about my personal life and you cannot move toward to a universe of trust without pressing through the pain of disappointment broken relationships uh hurts and even betrayals and so what i would encourage everyone to do right now is to maybe take a moment and examine the invisible boundaries they've allowed themselves to be confined within because of the pain they've experienced and to realize that the bridge through pain is usually trust and that as you learn how to trust others even though you maybe have had misplaced trust in the past you will become more free it is better to trust and disappointed than to not trust and be alone is there not a third option is it not a cheat code this is exhausting and this is why we must be battle ready because life is a battle and as the great philosopher once said love is a battlefield isn't that pat bennett field or the tour benetton all right an 80s okay thank you okay it wasn't like we are gonna wrap this up is that cool is that okay yeah i think this is a lovely episode on pain and trust and trust uh my name is eric mcmanus and i'm here with my father earl mcmanus if you were listening if you were watching if you are sharing if you are being shared with we are so grateful we love you guys thank you for the emails thank you for the dms and the messages and the video messages and the comments and the likes and the sharing and thank you for buying merch and and supporting uh honestly i would think it was just we threw up a capsule this week we may leave it up we're not sure but we know we want for people to be able to associate with what we're building here question everything think freely and have the best week and don't be afraid to be wrong just uh be afraid to be uninformed i like that one that's good all right you can write and review the podcast on itunes you can just do it on spotify and you can watch it on youtube and so many other places we love you guys have a great day all right take care

Channel: Mosaic

Views: 5,258

Rating: 5 out of 5

Keywords: MOSAIC, MOSAIC Los Angeles, Erwin McManus, Erwin Raphael McManus, Los Angeles Church, Church, Jesus, Worship, Mosaic MSC, Mosaic, MSC, Aaron mcmanus, leadership, battle ready, battle ready podcast, erwin mcmanus podcast, battle ready erwin, battle ready aaron, battle ready mosaic, mosaic podcastt, mcmanus show, erwin mcmanus leadership podcast, battle ready with erwin mcmanus and aaron mcmanus, self help, pain, recovery, trust, trust issues, pain tolerance, life advice

Id: suUj__X1W2w

Length: 42min 28sec (2548 seconds)

Published: Fri Oct 23 2020