One-on-One

I wondered how I could ever return [Music] having to relive in my mind over and over again the event of losing my son I've never been good at asking for help maybe because my life was so ideal almost perfect [Music] joy Russell moved into our neighborhood and then through church I was assigned to watch over his family and we became good friends for years Troy and I played basketball in the mornings but then he stopped coming Troy adored Austin he was his right-hand man he was his basketball buddy he and Austin had such a close bond over that is something that United them and it was a reminder of what he had lost our family was cleaning out our garage and we had a pile of things that we were gonna donate the truck was on the street when it was about 80% full I thought you know why are we walking all the way to the street so I backed the truck up in the driveway so it's closer and we finished loading the last few things up and I turned and I put the car and drive and drove forward and I felt I felt the truck go over something and my thought was something had fallen out of a truck and I looked back and I see my precious little boy I instantly knew what had happened so I grabbed my phone and called 9-1-1 I saw Austin lying next to the truck and Travis just standing there in shock that's when they started to panic that's when I started to really panic and all of a sudden there we are following an ambulance and then there we are in the hospital and then there's the chaplain talking to us and as soon as we learned how the accident had happened it was like the second heartbreak because we already knew that Austin had passed but then there's heartbreak of Troy for me and Dedra there was absolutely no joy in life in anything it felt as though a house had landed on top of us and we couldn't budge it we couldn't move it breathing was difficult it was even hard to talk to each other we just didn't even know what to say even though it was so hard for me I knew it was 100 times worse for Troy my heart broke for him every day they see the grief is heavy and it is true it feels like a huge burden that's on you and you just can't you can't get out of it by yourself I don't normally really pray for my buddies but I prayed for Troy he still has four kids to take care of a wife to take care of a business to run how do I help there was a lot of people around trying to help helping take care of temporal needs and so when I would go over there I couldn't see anything that I could do and I tried several different things and basketball was one of them one of the things I'd done regularly has gone to early-morning basketball but that was the last thing I wanted to do you know train was having a hard time getting out of bed and there was no way he was gonna get a bed and drive himself there we thought let's let him know how much we love him and get him back out to some version of normal when I first called Troy he wasn't really excited about it he was there at 5:15 in the morning if he didn't show to pick me up I would have I would have stayed bed with a little bit of encouragement I did tell him that I would come in and get him he wasn't out front and we were in the car and I just talked and Troy is a good talker talked about what I was experiencing what I was learning feelings I was having John basically just listened if we were in a band he would be the lead singer and I would be off in the corner playing bass or something he just can he can talk there was anything he said it was just him being there listening to me I didn't try to fix them that's I'm not capable of that I'm capable of listening to someone but I don't know that there's anything I could say off a bumper sticker or quoting a scripture that's gonna change his life and I didn't feel like that's what he needed the time we presented him with the jerseys was that first basketball day back we were all wearing these jerseys Troy walks in I knew it was going to be a special moment the number three and the significance of and everything that tied together to have that presented to him and have us all wearing that Jersey it was just something that symbolized Austin and their bond together and it was almost like a Brotherhood had come home that we hadn't seen for a while they really didn't know what to do to help take away the pain and the sorrow that I was going through but to see that that they cared that I wasn't going through this alone I don't think they could have done anything better I went that one time I wouldn't gone back if John hadn't continued calling me texting me picking me up over and over again it turned into something that was difficult to something I was able to do to something I was actually once again looking forward to John coming to the house you know three mornings a week and just being there and try being able to rely on him being there was so important for Troy after losing Austin just the intense pain the sorrow it feels like there's nothing that can help why you know why did I back the truck into the driver wait and leave it on the the street so many things going through my mind and so the pain that I felt was a combination of of everything and it had gotten to a point right I couldn't take any more I I don't know how to explain it but I feel like I was gonna burst inside or I was gonna be crushed I couldn't I could not bear anymore that pain I dropped my knees I prayed to our Heavenly Father I said oh please take this pain from because I can't take it anymore and at that moment I felt help speak to me not to my ears but like he spoke to my spirit and he said I can take away the pain but I'd have to take away the nine years you had with your son or you can keep those nine years that you had with your son and endure the pain that comes with losing him and at that moment it completely changed my perspective because I would not I would not give up anything for those nine years ahead of my son I knew that the road ahead was gonna be long and hard but I knew that it was gonna be okay looking back on all the things that everybody did for us those friends of ours and her neighbors ministering to us for months and months taking care of our kids and bringing us mills that was what helped us through all the things that the community wanted to do to come together to try to help it was awesome to see you'll notice that balloons are being passed out around the court we're going to release these balloons and say a big happy birthday Austin one two three [Applause] [Music] I don't think I could have been as helpful to Troy without having a friendship before and to me ministering is synonymous with friendship I don't I don't know that there's much difference between the two this experience has changed the way I think about God God wants us to love each other and take care of each other he doesn't want to give us a list or a recipe if go do this go do that I think he wants us to just look out for each other notice and go do [Music] the Savior always ministered one-on-one to each individual according to their needs I felt Christ reach out through John and others to lift this heavy weight off me helping me get to a point where I once again had joy laughter and I could be the husband and the father that I needed to be [Music] and while I miss Austin and wish she was with us I know that through Christ that we'll see him again [Music] [Music] after Austin passed away we started cleaning up the house and I went up into the laundry room and about an hour later she she called for me to come upstairs and I reached into a pocket of a pair of pants and we're in the church the previous Sunday and I came out with this note that he had folded and put in there and it says remember the worth of souls is great in the sight of God one of the things that I've have come to know for sure is that Heavenly Father is so aware of us he knows everything that we're going through our worth is great in his sight [Music] you

Channel: The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints

Views: 582,608

Rating: 4.9261041 out of 5

Keywords: mormon messages, mormon channel, lds, church, lds videos, mormon videos, child death, car accident, ministering, angels, basketball mormon, church ball, overcome, trial, death, suffer

Id: 0SyN-EeYTBU

Length: 13min 2sec (782 seconds)

Published: Thu Mar 28 2019

Reddit Comments

[u/icekull111]

Thank you for posting this... Troy, the man this focuses on, is actually my uncle. This whole disaster has impacted my family in so many ways it’s hard to describe... The day that Austen died was the same day I opened my Mission call. Being able to hear my uncles incredibly testimony right before I left has been one of the biggest blessings in my life. His strength got my through my Mission, and not a day goes by that I don’t remember his example. It’s hard to put everything that I’m feeling into words, but I want everyone who watches this to know that I wouldn’t be who I am today if it wasn’t for the knowledge of the plan of salvation that I have, and the strength and comfort it can give to families who are in the midst of despair. Sorry I know I’m rambling, but I just want to share how much I appreciate people sharing this story.

[u/SafetyX]

This video cut me deep, especially after hearing about the poor little 6 year old that got run over in Vineyard, UT yesterday.

My grandma watched her little 2 year old get run over by a dump truck and she wept every time she told the story. Man it's amazing to have knowledge of The Plan of Salvation.

[u/malaika_bustani]

This is an amazing video. Very well done. It doesn't imply that the ministering brother showed up and fixed everything or that the plan of salvation makes it so this family isn't sad anymore. It truly acknowledges the deep and life-long pain of losing a child. I love how the friend just listened and acknowledged that he was not capable of fixing his friend's pain. All we can do is take care of each other and love each other and let others know that they don't have to face tragedy alone. I love how the father shared that, yes, he will feel the pain of losing his son for the remainder of his life because he will continue to love his son for the remainder of his life.

[u/Briggs2326]

My wife and I just watched this with our 2 young boys present. Big mistake. They just kept asking why mom is crying and why I won’t look anyone in the eye.

It was a wonderful reminder of the plan of salvation and the comfort that comes with knowing it. But it was a very difficult video to watch. Glad I did it. Hope I never do it again.

[u/cruiseplease]

That was very difficult to watch. Poor family. Just one innocent mistake changed their whole lives.

[u/DaffynitionMaker]

I just watched it and I wept. In a lesser neighborhood this man would be accused of murder, hated and ostracized. But to see all these people come there for him and doing thoughtful actions!!! I wept. This is pure religion. I love it. I love it so much and I will never leave it.