One Another | Part Two | How to break the cycle of grudge

[Music] we're glad you're here this morning i want you to stand up with us we're going to sing together so good just one word [Music] [Music] my [Music] that makes a way there's nothing that our god can't do no more just one word [Music] [Music] just one time [Music] just one time my eyes [Music] [Applause] [Music] away [Music] this is [Applause] [Music] there's however for greater things there's no power like the power of jesus the faith arise of jesus [Music] is [Applause] [Music] [Applause] [Music] oh [Music] [Applause] [Music] is [Music] hey well good morning thanks so much for being here you guys can go ahead and take a seat for a few minutes uh my name is holly and i'm on staff here at north point and we're going to be here today for about 50 minutes we're going to sing some songs together and then jamie dickens is here for part two of one another and i have to tell you you guys are in for a real treat hey if it's your first time at north point we hope that it will not be your last time and in fact we want to connect with you we have a gift for you today and we'd love to see you after the service in our connections area which is right outside of the east auditorium and if you're watching online today all you have to do is click that i'm new button answer a couple questions and we'd love to connect with you that way well hey this morning when you were driving in you probably noticed some people carrying some canned goods and that is today is because today is our summer food drive so whenever we give you guys a chance to step up and give and serve and love this community you guys blow our minds with your generosity so thank you so much for those of you who contributed today and brought in those canned goods but if you're like me and you forgot to do that grocery store run last night it is okay we have a way that you can participate just visit northpointe.org forward slash food drive one more thing i would love for you guys to know uh this year on a sunday july 4th actually falls on a sunday this year so we've had so much fun just doing lawn events celebrating outside we decided why not do it again so july 4th you are invited to an outdoor service it's going to be family friendly we're going to have fun and music and you are not going to want to miss it it is a great time actually to invite your friends or family or whoever that you would like to share north point with but you're going to need to reserve your spot and you can do that at forward northpoint.org july 4th at this time i'd love to invite the band back up and we're going to continue worshiping together and this first song it's one of my favorites uh the opening words say this may the king of my heart be the mountain that i run the fountain that i drink from oh he is my song and i don't know where you are on your journey with the lord today maybe he feels really close and those words are comforting or maybe you cannot imagine that those words could be true for you but the reality is the same invitation is waiting for all of us and that's just to lean in just a little bit closer to him let's stand and sing [Music] is [Music] you are good you're good you are good you're good you are [Music] [Music] let the king of my heart be the wind inside myself [Music] [Applause] [Music] is [Music] and let is king of my heart be the fire inside these veins [Music] [Applause] you are [Music] [Applause] you good good [Applause] [Music] you're never gone you're never [Music] you're never [Music] you're never [Applause] you are good [Music] [Applause] [Music] okay [Music] you're [Music] you're gonna [Music] it's who you are it's [Music] you're a is good it's who you are it's who you [Music] are [Music] is [Music] to [Music] it's who you are it's who you are it's who you are and i'm loved by you it's who i am father we thank you lord for who you are lord we thank you lord for loving us in spite of all our failures father you continue to be a good good father and lord we just pray for every single person that's here today we pray for those that are streaming online lord and we just ask that you continue to strengthen their faith in you lord that you continue to fill their hearts with your love your unfailing mercy lord jesus and your grace and it's in your holy lord name in your matches name jesus that we all say amen and amen thank you guys [Music] well last week we started a series called one another because no matter who you are you've all got em we've got family friends neighbors co-workers roommates random strangers and all the people on the other side of our social media we've all got one another's and we're all trying to figure out how to one another well how to relate to people in our lives well and it may surprise you to know that one anothering is actually a specialty of the church something that the church is supposed to be known for uh it's founder jesus famously said these words right here we talk about these a lot around our church a new command i give you love here it is one another as i have loved you so you must love one another by this by this all people will know that you are my disciples by how you love one another this is what the church is supposed to be known for it's how you're supposed to be able to tell that there is a local church in the area because there's this group of people or if it's big enough there's this organization who's distinguishing mark whose reputation in the community is that they one another really really well and while this has certainly been one of the things that has attracted so many people to christianity through the centuries it's also a secret sauce that has proven rather easy to lose because sometimes it's just easier for christians to make church about our theology and our services rather than our one another i mean sometimes it's just easier to make this command one of those things we smile and not at in church but don't actually apply to our lives and this last season didn't help at all did it whether it's from being cooped up at home or fighting with people about politics in the community our one anothering i mean our one another muscles have taken a beating this last season was known for anything but good one another and so whether you feel like you're one another muscles have taken a beating or they're just a little bit atrophied from the isolation uh if you're anything like me perhaps you need a little bit of a refresher course and that's this series this series is a call back to the basics the call back to one anothering the way jesus commanded us to one another and as we said last week this isn't just for jesus followers we're talking about three practices that were we to start resume or accelerate doing them they would instantly begin to make our lives better our relationships healthier our workplaces more productive our reputations more positive our influence as leaders parents and coaches more powerful our dialogue more constructive and i believe our communities and even nicer place to live but if you are a christian if you are a jesus follower what we're uh talking about today is doubly important for us because what we're talking about in the series is what we are supposed to be known for it's what you're supposed to be famous for in your neighborhood in your community wherever it is that you are watching and i believe that if we are not careful if we don't tune in in this season that we're gonna risk losing our distinctive as christians we're gonna risk uh missing out on an amazing opportunity to make jesus famous for what he wants to be famous for so we're spending some weeks directly addressing where we found ourselves on the other side of this pandemic and all that happened in between and we're looking at how jesus's command to love one another as he has loved us ought to impact and i believe completely change our words to one another that was last week our conflicts with one another and the narratives that we tell about one another and today i want to talk about our conflicts and specifically not just any conflicts not just the conflicts that come and that are you know that come and go that are are gone as soon as they arrive i want to talk about the conflicts that linger i want to talk about the conflicts that last i want to talk about our grudges and we all hold grudges and by grudge i don't mean like deep seated hatred or necessarily like elaborate evil revenge plans now by a grudge i simply mean this right here getting mad and staying mad at someone getting mad and staying mad at someone i mean it's like the time when your spouse snaps at you in front of your friends and there's no recognition there's no apology they just go to bed and they make the classic mistake of thinking that everything's gonna be fine in the morning and we all know how that goes down it's like good morning hi how are you doing fine is everything okay yeah sure is everything okay with you wait what what's wrong what's wrong the fact that you have to ask that's what's wrong i can't even do this right that's a grudge right some of y'all weren't ready to get that real this morning uh or like you work it's like when your co-worker starts talking trash about you in the break room and you hear about it you're like and now you're avoiding this person you're trying to keep them out of meetings if you can and for the last month everything in your mind has been a competition and you're like that's right randy these sales numbers don't look like someone who's not going to be here very long you're not going to be here very long you know that's a grudge or it happens on social media all the time like when somebody makes a snarky or insulting comment about you and maybe they don't even tag you and you're like oh no you did not and now you are 23 comments deep with this person and you're getting friends to help you craft responses right anybody done that i've done that uh that's a grudge right the dictionary definition of a grudge is this a persistent feeling of ill will or resentment resulting from a perceived injury or offense and we all hold grudges with the people in our lives some of us for days some of us for weeks some of us for months but we all hold them why because grudges feel good i mean grudges just kind of they feel right at least on the surface right like ooh i'm going to get him oh i'm going to show her they're going to get what's coming to them i mean we may not like to admit it but grudges kind of feel good that's why we all tend to hold them but there's just one problem with holding grudges they don't actually work have you ever noticed that have you ever noticed that holding a grudge doesn't really work here's how i know that because many of us are still holding on to one like you picked up a garage days ago or weeks ago or months ago and you're still holding it like whatever it was supposed to accomplish it clearly hasn't accomplished you're still unhappy they're still unhappy you're still hurt they're still hurt the only thing that's changed is the date on the calendar but number two i have never in all of my life heard a happy grudge story you ever heard a happy grudge story no like you've never heard somebody go man my friend and i got in the biggest fight and we were mad at each other for a month it was awesome you know no one's like oh my mother-in-law and i like hate each other because she's always always trying to tell us how to parent our kids i love the holidays you know nobody ever says that no one's ever grateful for a grudge no one celebrates a grudge it is always unpleasant and it is always detrimental why because getting mad and staying mad at someone it doesn't just affect them does it who does it affect yeah you and me i mean we hold a grudge under the premise that we're gonna get them back but we're the ones thinking about it we're the ones angry about it we're the ones distracted by it we're the ones having those imaginary conversations with them in our heads weird how we all do that i know you do it too we're the ones dealing with day two anger or like week to anger you know what day two anger is like when you thought you were just frustrated but then you went to bed and let it simmer and then you woke up a hot mess you know and you're like kicking the dog you're irritated at the kids you're snapping at your spouse you're distracted the whole work day plotting this other person's destruction and by the time you come home you are like emotionally and mentally exhausted and this whole time what has your grudge actually done to the other person yeah like basically nothing i mean and i'm exaggerating a little bit having fun with it but i mean that's pretty much how it goes because there's a sinister thing about a grudge and it's this right here the sinister thing about a grudge is that the more you hold on to a grudge the more it has a hold on you isn't that true the more you hold on to a grudge the more it has a hold on you and this is why every single one of us in the room has seen a grudge make home miserable a friendship awkward a workplace tense and it's why every one of us could recount a story of a time when a grudge ripped family members or friends or work you know co-workers or most recently a nation apart i mean truly i can't remember a time in my life when grudges felt more prominent than they have in this last season like this last year has been marked by a significant uptick in persistent feelings of ill will resulting from a perceived injury or offense i mean as individuals we spent the last year cooped up at home with like work life and personal lives stacked on top of each other uh perhaps you were isolated or perhaps you were managing kids running around you know in the back of your zoom calls and your spouse suddenly they're 7 you know and then as a nation we we went through a health crisis a racial crisis a presidential election and battle lines were drawn in like almost every arena and if you're like me you felt it on both fronts you were faced with an unprecedented number of opportunities to get at odds with people at home even though you love them dearly while simultaneously being offered by the news or social media or maybe your group texts an imprisoned unprecedented number of reasons to get at odds with somebody in the community yeah we have spent the last year being set up for or even baited towards holding grudges of one kind or another and i suspect we all got them in fact i bet you're thinking of one right now they come to mind pretty quick i bet you're thinking of a person or a group of people or a category of people i am and whether it is a deep-seated lasting grudge or it's simply the ups and downs of everyday relationships fresh off a pandemic i suspect we're all holding grudges of some kind and i also suspect that they are holding us right back and they are hurting our relationships and stealing our joy and robbing our focus and disrupting our community and undermining our influence and deep down we all know that's a problem i mean i think we all know that our standard approach to conflict like as a culture it isn't getting us where we or where god wants us to be and i think we all know that but if you're anything like me i bet many of us also feel a little stuck and here's why because many of us have probably spent most of our lives developing in this last season entrenching a dangerous habit when it comes to our conflicts a habit that sustains conflict rather than defuses it a habit that all but ensures that conflicts will turn into grudges that get a hold on us and until we as a culture are we as individuals and we as friends and families until we change this habit we are gonna have a very difficult time having the relationships that we're all hoping for the national dialogue and the sense of unity that we're all eager for or even the personal peace and joy that we're all looking for but church family to take it a step further and tell or unless we change this habit we're never going to be known for what we're supposed to be known for because it is impossible not just difficult it is impossible to love one another the way jesus has loved us while indulging this specific habit that we're going to talk about today and so in the name of that i would like to invite us and encourage us this morning to consider and put into practice a revolutionary approach to our conflicts given to us by the apostle paul a pro an approach that has the power to break the hold of grudges on our lives or on our families or on our friend groups or on our workplaces and on our country and as with the principle last week whether you are religious or not if you will start doing what i'm about to read to you it will immediately begin to make your life and your relationships in our community better i promise but if you are a jesus follower what i'm about to read to you and to us is not optional for us because it is right at the epicenter of jesus's command to us as a church and it's found in paul's letter to a church at the center of uh political power uh cultural debate a city full of diversity and division and political intrigue it's found in paul's letter to the church in rome and he says to them these words he says do not repay anyone evil for evil do not repay anyone evil for evil be careful to do what is right in the eyes of others do not repay anyone evil for evil the implied context here is that somebody has done evil to you someone's wronged you someone has offended you and for starters it's nice to kind of just nice to hear paul acknowledge and recognize that what the person did to you is evil like we like seeing that word right there thank you that's nice he's not like ah it's not a big deal don't worry about it no what she said to you was evil what he did to you was evil or at least how it made you feel or the impact that it had on your life that was evil and that's really important as we start this conversation that the starting point this morning isn't i'll get over it or oh forget about it no no the starting point is a recognition that you have a legitimate reason to be upset you have a legitimate reason to want revenge you have a legitimate reason to hold a grudge and i love that i appreciate that but perhaps even more importantly paul recognizes and even calls out that our first inclination in any situation is to repay evil with evil to repay an offense with an offense and that's the habit that we're talking about today we have both a natural inclination and a practiced habit of repaying evil with evil and it's a habit that starts way early in life i mean you remember being a kid i've got four of them i see it all the time when somebody punches you you punch them back harder when somebody knocks your blocks over you knock them over when somebody insults you you insult their mom i mean that's just how it goes it's as basic and as instinctive as it gets and it's not like there's a point in life when we suddenly trade out that habit for a new one no you might get more mature your thresholds might get higher your revenge mechanisms might become more sophisticated and more veiled you know instead of actually hitting somebody maybe you just are cold or manipulative or sarcastic or whatever but no no barring intervention this habit doesn't go away it just grows up and that's why it's a habit that we have all probably spent most of our lives developing and many of us have spent the last season entrenching in our lives we repay evil for evil and god through the apostle paul says you got to stop that don't do that you've got to break this habit why because revenge never happens like you think it's gonna happen it never works like you think it will have you ever realized this like it you think here's what we always think i'll get revenge and then we'll be what even and then it'll be over but that never happens like it's never just evil for evil because when you repay evil for evil what does the other person then repay you with yeah gift cards and a back massage no more evil right and so it becomes evil for evil for evil for evil for evil until it looks something like this that ladies and gentlemen is what a grudge looks like evil for evil for evil offense for offense for offense and some of you are like that looks familiar you're like hey that's twitter yeah that's twitter hey that's like the nightly news hey that's politics yeah it kind of feels like it sometimes or maybe some of you are like man i've i've had some days that looked like that this last year at home yeah i think i think we all did or man that was my friend group last month major drama going on or that's what work feels like now or hey that's what happens when my extended family gets together yeah some of us have had days like this some of you have had months like this and some of you are going on years caught in a cycle of evil for evil offense for offense for offense for offense and that by the way is exactly what we end up building we end up building fences with our offenses a friend of mine saw this illustration and i just had to show it today because it captures so clearly what happens when we do this when we get in the cycle of a fence for a fence for offense we end up building fences and this is what it looks like like you do evil to me well i'm offended and i'm gonna repay evil for evil that's the only play i got in my playbook so you know what that text should do the trick right there get in there but no that's not enough for you because now you're offended and you repay my repayment with more of the same evil and it's like are you kidding me that's not okay i didn't start this i don't deserve this and i'm so offended at how you're handling this that i cannot leave it unaddressed so you know what you're getting the cold shoulder there you go i'm not even talking to you anymore like we're done for a minute i'm over you whatever but you can't let that slide because people are watching so what do you start doing you start running your mouth you start talking to people triangulate and you start like trying to win our friends over to your side like their sides it's like since when did we do that that's so offensive i mean it's so immature are you kidding me and but you know what i don't know when you thought that was okay but i'm gonna respond in kind i mean you bat me into a corner i'm not gonna be the one that loses friends over this you're gonna be the one losing friends over this so you know you're just gonna have to deal with that oh oh so now you're gonna post on social media about it that's super mature i mean good night how petty but hey you know what two can play that game bro um i can also post a bible verse and everybody knows that i'm really talking about you so let's just go ahead and do that right there um some of y'all done that um and now we're in a rhythm aren't we now we're now we're in a we're in a rhythm you offend me i offend you you offend me i offend you you offend me i offend you and before we know it before even some days or some weeks have passed we have traded a fence for a fence for a fence for offense and we are literally fenced in by our fences does this look familiar yeah in fact i bet we could go around the room right now if we had the time and like each one of us you could give your own version of this in your family or in one of your friendships or in your workplace or on your social media account or just what you've seen happening in our nation this past year stories of offense for offense for offense for offense because this is what we do we build fences with our offenses and my question to you this morning is just simply that who's on the other side of your fence right now who's on the other side of the fence from you right now what relationship have you allowed to get fenced in by your offenses what arena of life has been nagged by just chronic fence building this past year who's on the other side of your fence you know what's sad that was so sad is that for so many of us in the room the answer is people we care about it's people we care about like so many of us in the room and go yes me and my spouse right now not like we're in crisis but we've just gotten in this rut of building petty little fences as soon as we tear one down we just build another one i mean oh it stinks so annoying so many of us in the room would say that's a family member of mine it's like my cousin or my brother or my mother or whatever and and y'all make it work and you do love each other but for a while there's just been this right here and you're like man i miss how it used to be so many of us in the room would say yeah it's a friend it's a friend of yours and it is such a shame i mean it is such a shame because you guys are so close or at least you were but somehow you got fenced in so many of us in the room would say it's a co-worker and it's just so irritating because you guys should be allies i mean everybody knows you'd be an incredible support to one another but nah this is just what work looks like now wow so many of us me me including so many of us are have like fenced ourselves off from people we care about and it's such a shame it's so sad but you want to know what i think is even worse for those of us who are jesus followers for many of us who are jesus followers the answer is that we have fenced ourselves off of not just people we care about we fenced ourselves off from people we're called to care for because we're the people who are supposed to be known for loving one another as jesus has loved us we're the people who are supposed to be known by how we one another but many of us have allowed ourselves to be fenced off from the very people we're called to care for like some of us right now have an entire category of people on the other side of this fence people who believe differently from us voted differently from us value things very differently from us and they have a name and a category and and they're them and the fences are long and reinforced but most of us also just have normal people over there like people who inconvenience us or irritate us or annoy us or just random acquaintances neighbors co-workers friends that we technically don't care enough about to deal with this church family many of us have allowed ourselves to be fenced off from people we're called to care for and we're too busy fighting with them to join jesus and caring for them and i think jesus is going come on come on this is how they're supposed to know this is how they're supposed to know that you follow me oh man no matter who you are we so many of us we are fencing ourselves off from people we care for care about and people we're called to care for we're fencing ourselves off from people we care about and people that we're called to care for and it has got to stop we want it to stop and so for starters the apostle paul is simply suggesting an interruption he's suggesting that we interrupt the cycle of evil for evil he said hey i don't know how long your line normally is but it's something like evil for evil for evil for evil for blank and now here's you or there's where you're going to be with your spouse or your friend or your co-worker or somebody on social media one day soon and paul is saying for starters i just want you to decide not to put evil in the blank i just want you to decide that i'm not gonna continue the cycle i'm not gonna continue with this habit i'm not gonna put evil i'm not gonna put get even i'm not gonna put hold a grudge in the blink to which everyone's natural reaction is i mean that doesn't really feel right i mean did you see what they did have you seen their offenses what about them to which paul responds this isn't about them here's what this is about this is what he says next if it is possible as far as it depends on you live at peace with everyone this isn't about them this is about you this is about you doing your part for peace as far as it depends on you and revenge is not your part look what he says next he says do not take revenge my dear friends but leave room for god's wrath for it is written it is mine to avenge i will repay says the lord and y'all this is where god's probably gonna get most up in your business this morning so i apologize in advance but the apostle paul is quoting god directly as recorded in deuteronomy in the old testament where god says i it is mine to avenge i will repay and this is the part of the passage that ought to give us extraordinary peace about this really awkward hard and counter-cultural thing that paul is inviting us to do because he says when you do not take revenge paul's saying somebody far more capable gets involved god says i will repay i will personally respond to the evil done to you now question who do you think is better at getting revenge you or god you can talk in our church it's okay yeah god is way better than you at getting revenge i mean we all intuitively understand that but not only that god knows how to do it right because you see when you and i respond to evil all we usually ever want to do is hurt all we ever want to do is hurt back hit back insult back steal back offend back all you and i know to do is hurt but god god knows how to heal and god wants to heal you and god wants to heal this situation and god wants to heal the other person god is way better at responding to evil than you or i will ever be but we gotta look what it says we gotta leave room we gotta leave room so someone so many of us we're so set on getting revenge and repaying evil for evil that there's no room for god to get in and do his thing and god is like get out of my way quit taking my job leave room for me i'll handle it and when we do when we do not take revenge but leave room for god our hands become free to do something else something incredibly powerful and what paul says next is the main point of this passage and this the main point of today he says to these romans this church in rome he says do not be overcome with evil our way of holding grudges and repaying evil for evil it pretty much ensures that it is going to overcome us why because the more you hold on to a grudge the more it has a hold on you and your family or your friends or your co-workers in our community but it is not the only option there is another option and it is the secret for breaking this habit in our lives do not be overcome with evil but overcome evil with good overcome evil with good have you ever seen sweetness diffuse someone's saltiness have you ever seen a hug dissipate an argument have you ever seen an act of service fall in icy tension or have you ever seen owning and apologizing turn enemies into friends you seen that that's how you break the cycle of a grudge that's how you stop evil in its tracks when it's your turn you don't keep building the fence you start taking it apart you start saying when you do evil to me i'm gonna do good to you and when you do evil to me again i'm gonna do good to you again and when you keep doing evil to me i'm gonna keep doing evil to you in fact no matter what you do i've already decided i already know how i'm gonna respond as far as it depends on me as far as it depends on me i'm gonna live at peace i'm gonna do good i'm not gonna let this evil overcome me and i am not gonna let this evil overcome us i'm gonna do good to you because you're someone i care about or at a minimum you are someone that i am called to care for so i am gonna overcome this evil with the only thing in the world that can't overcome it i'm gonna overcome it with good and now all of a sudden you realize that you built something different because i no longer have a fence i no longer no longer have a barrier what do i have yeah i've got a bridge i've just built a bridge and now all of a sudden peace is possible now all of a sudden reconciliation is possible now all of a sudden healing is possible at least as far as it depends on me and all of a sudden like we have a chance no matter how small it is we have a chance as a family or we have a chance as friends or we got a chance as co-workers or we have a chance as a nation to start telling a different story from even evil for evil for evil for evil now we've got a chance but it'll only happen if you and i decide to be bridge builders rather than fence builders it's only gonna happen if you and i decide start building bridges rather than barriers this is the habit this is the habit that we're gonna have to change if what paul is describing to the romans is ever going to be true of us we're going to have to realize that there is only one way in the whole wide world to keep evil from overcoming us and that is to overcome it with good as dr martin luther king jr said darkness cannot drive out darkness only light can do that hate cannot drive out hate only love can do that and y'all we have a heavenly father who overcame the devil himself and his hold on our lives and he didn't do it with evil he didn't do it with hate he didn't do it with darkness he did it by the light and the love of jesus christ who died for us on a cross the worst day in history for evil was the greatest day in history for good the greatest demonstration in history of good god overcame our worst by giving us his best and he's inviting us to join him he's inviting us to join him and let go of this toxic cycle of vengeance in our homes in our friendships in our workplaces and in our nation and start overcoming evil with good and this is part two of three of how i want to invite us and encourage us me included to become famous for loving one another i want us to become known by this verse i want us to be different from our culture because we practice this verse delightfully distinct from the trends because we normalize this approach to conflict wherever we go i'm hoping that many of us decide right here right now that we're going gonna start turning our barriers into bridges and look i realize that this is one of those things that is it's very easy for me to say from stage but it's a whole different ball game when it comes to actually applying it to a relationship in the world it's one thing to say in here it's a whole different thing to do it out there and i know i i know that in here i hope at least this is going to feel really inspiring but i just want to acknowledge that out there what it's really going to feel like is this it's going to feel risky it's going to feel risky because when you repay evil with good there's a chance that they will not reciprocate there's a chance that they will keep right on going and we're going to have to remember that it is not about them it is not about what they do it is about as far as it depends on me live at peace and though it is risky i would submit that it is even more risky to let a grudge linger around and start to sink its claws into you and the people you love not only is it going to feel risky though it's also going to feel unfair oh man it's going to feel unfair the other person is never going to deserve you to repay their evil with good it's always going to feel really really unfair but i hope that we remember that what's more unfair is that somebody who hurt you would continue to have a hold on you what's more unfair is that a grudge would start to negatively impact your family or your friends or your productivity or your joy or your hopes and dreams that's more unfair but lastly just keeping it real that's also gonna feel weak it's gonna feel like someone is you know just running over you and on this point i hope you will not misunderstand this is not a call to let somebody take advantage of you no way you can do good while still having guard rails and boundaries and protections in place absolutely furthermore this is not a call to just let evil run amok let evil go unopposed no way you can do good while still taking a stand against evil and still being undeterred and unwavering and even loud about it 100 and of course the bigger an evil gets the more nuanced and complicated it becomes to overcome that evil with good but i believe we can do it we've done it before and i believe that together with the power of the holy spirit we can do it again so yes building bridges rather than barriers will absolutely feel and be risky unfair and it'll feel weak which is why so few people do it but if you and i will decide to be different to put a counter-cultural approach over our conflicts on our conflicts we will discover the secret of achieving a counter-cultural result in our lives we will discover the secret of how not to be overcome by evil but how to overcome it with good and so even though these things are absolutely true i'm hoping that many of you are going to decide today to start building bridges rather than barriers but if you are a jesus follower this is not optional for you because these things right here to jesus are not obstacles to jesus these things right here are amazing opportunities these are amazing opportunities to show the world what it means to love one another as he has loved us because yeah this is risky but our savior risked everything for us jesus laid down his life he left heaven and laid down his life while we were still sinners jesus risked everything for me without any indication that i would do anything for him jesus is not deterred by risky and it's also going to feel unfair but hello unfair is our story i mean are you kidding me we all have different stories in this room but as christians the one thing we have in common it's the overwhelming never-ending mind-blowing grace of god it's the idea that long before i loved him he loved me long before i ever wanted him he wanted me long before i ever did anything for him he paid for me and no matter how many days i spent running away from him he kept running after me and here i stand today alive forgiven and free and i didn't do a thing to earn it but trust the savior who did for me what i couldn't do for myself jesus is not deterred by unfair and hey you know what it's going to look and feel weak but that's exactly what they said to jesus as he hung on a cross you're weak and then three days later his strength overwhelmed the grave and death lost its hold on you and me this is how jesus has loved us he overcame evil with good and it was risky and it was unfair and it was weak but evil coward before him and he said as i have loved you as i have loved you i want you to love one another go love one another this is how they're gonna know this is how they're gonna know that you're my followers this is how they're gonna know how much i love them and y'all the best way to let the world know how much jesus loves them isn't simply to tell them it's to show them it's decide that we're going to start turning our barriers into bridges and we're going to leave vengeance to god so what do you say church church what do you say we decide right here right now to start repaying evil with good and let's see if our heavenly father does not in fact overcome it what do you say we start becoming famous for loving one another as jesus has loved us and in the name of that as i close i'd just like to give you a couple of practical ways that you can start building a bridge a couple of very specific things that you could actually use as a board in your bridge very practical ways to start repaying evil with good right now right wherever you are in a relationship with somebody and we're gonna post these on social media so you don't have to like write them down but here they are number one let's go quickly and go directly like when there's a conflict let's go quickly and go directly to the person we're not gonna talk to other people we're not gonna post on social media we're gonna go straight to them uh number two be quick to forgive be quick to renounce your right and your plans to take revenge it's amazing how this one simple decision can completely change your demeanor towards somebody doesn't mean they continue to hurt you or that you continue to trust them but you just decide i'm not getting vengeance number three uh own your part let's be people who own our part in almost every situation there's a piece of the pie that belongs to me that's my fault let's be the people who let them know to them to say here's my part of the pie and before i uh confront you with your part i'm gonna confront you with mine let's do that number uh four let's speak well of them when everybody runs into their sides and the ruts of speaking uh you know ill about those who've offended them let's weirdly be the people who are speaking well of our enemies you know we may vent in private but publicly we're going to speak well let's serve them this is actually the example the apostle paul gives in the passage um but let's like do good to them you could just do good to someone be generous in some way help in some way with no strings attached or finally pray for someone pray for them let's be the people who pray for those on the other side of our fence pray for god's will to be done pray for healing pray for the situation and offer yourself to participate in whatever god wants to do and in so doing you can start building a bridge and this last one right here this is where i would like for us all to start right now would you be willing to join me this summer pick one relationship with somebody in your life who's on the other side of your fence and just start praying for them because y'all it is really really difficult to do evil to somebody that you're praying for and who knows maybe just maybe your prayers will change the situation maybe just maybe your prayers will change their heart but most definitely your prayers will begin to change your heart your prayers will begin to prime your heart to apply this verse in that relationship and start building a bridge rather than a barrier would you be willing to join me this summer pick one relationship and just start praying for them every day and if not every day pray for them every week and see what god does so that's the question i want to end on who in your life right now most needs a bridge who in your life is on the other side of a fence from you and they are just as exhausted just as offended just as hurt and just as discouraged probably secretly wishing for a bridge but having no idea how to start building one because they only got the habit that we all grew up with what if you went first what if in jesus name you just went first and you see if it isn't true that you can in fact overcome evil with good that's how we can that's how we need to that's how as christians we are called to love one another let's go start turning our barriers in to bridges let me pray for us as we close father i pray that you would uh prompt our hearts this morning with someone someone who's on the other side of a fence and then you would break our hearts for what could happen if we just decided to go first and start building a bridge rather than a barrier and so i pray for us that we would see something miraculous happen in that very relationship this summer because we started praying for them and then we started acting on whatever it is that you put in front of us next to do to repay evil with good and we do pray that in jesus name we would not be overcome with evil our families would not be overcome with evil our friends would not become over overcome with evil our workplaces our nation would not in jesus name be overcome with evil but instead you would use us to overcome it with good please do that and it's in jesus name that we pray amen you are here touching every heart i worship you i worship you you are here healing every heart i worship you i worship you [Music] him [Music] you [Music] [Applause] is [Music] that is who you are [Applause] [Applause] is is who you are [Music] [Music] you never stop [Applause] [Music] [Applause] [Music] [Applause] [Music] is [Music] [Applause] [Music] is [Music] amen well we are so glad you guys were here today our prayers that you will go out and begin to build bridges we'll see you next week

Channel: North Point Community Church

Views: 8,850

Keywords: North Point Community Church, North Point, NorthPoint, North Point Atlanta, Andy Stanley, AndyStanley, Andy Stanley church, Andy Stanley message, Andy Stanley sermons, North Point church, NPCC, North Point youtube, Andy Stanley YouTube

Id: s-proR6xpl4

Length: 62min 16sec (3736 seconds)

Published: Mon Jun 14 2021