Start your day off right with the free In Touch devotional. Subscribe today. ♪♪♪ ♪♪♪ ♪♪♪ male announcer: "In Touch"
with Dr. Charles Stanley, reaching the world with the
gospel of Jesus Christ through sound biblical teaching. Next on "In Touch,"
"No Greater Love." Dr. Charles Stanley: Jesus said,
"Greater love has no one than this, that one would lay down
his life for a friend." That's an awesome statement
when you begin to think about what He's really said. But probably one of
the most misunderstood, misused words in our
vocabulary is the word love. We spell it L-O-V-E, and we
put loving chocolate candy, loving somebody, loving a sport,
we put all of those things in the same category. Well, in the Greek
language, they didn't do that. They made it much more specific. And when I think about the
way people use love today, here's what
they're really saying, some people really and
truly, genuinely love, but some people, when they
say, "I love you," what they're saying is, "I want you. I desire you. I lust for you. Or I need you." But very few people know how to
say I love you with the kind of love that Jesus was
talking about in the Scripture. And so we use it
rather casually. And sometimes in our
thinking, we mean what we say, I love you, but what does
it mean to say I love you? Especially what Jesus said
when He said this, "No greater love than this that you lay
down your life for your friend." Well, love is at the
heart of the Scripture. The Bible, in essence, is
really the story of God's redeeming love for mankind. Salvation was a gift of love. Eternal life is a gift of love. Our forgiveness
is a gift of love. That is, it's all
about true, genuine love. And if I should ask you: Do
you feel loved by somebody? Well, most of you'd
probably say yes. Life without love is emptiness. There's no such thing as
happiness without being loved or having somebody to love. But we use that
word rather loosely. And I want us to see in this
passage of Scripture, in a few moments, what it's really
all about when Jesus said, "No greater love has anyone
than this, that you lay down your life
for your friends." So, you're
sitting there thinking, "Well, do you mean to tell me
that for me to express true, genuine love, that
I've got to die?" Well, keep listening and
let's see if you're going to live or not. And so I want us to look to see
what He says in the thirteenth and fifteenth chapters of
John because I want to read two verses in each one of these. And Jesus, the night before
He's going to be crucified, saying to His disciples over and
over and over again many things, especially about
the Holy Spirit. But here's what He says in
the thirty-fourth verse of the thirteenth chapter, "A new
commandment I give to you, that you love one another,
even as I have loved you, that you also love one another. By this shall all men know
that you are My disciples, that you have love
one to another." So three times He says it. Then if you will look in
the fifteenth chapter and the twelfth and thirteenth
verses, here's what He says, "This is My commandment,
that you love one another, just as I have loved you." What an awesome statement.
What a requirement. What pressure, almost. Listen, "This is My commandment,
that you love one another, just as I have loved you. Greater love has
no one than this, that one would lay down
his life for his friends." Now, L-O-V-E,
what does that mean? Well, in the Greek
language, they had four different words for love. One of them was eros,
E-R-O-S, which is passion, infatuation, sexual love. That word's not
found in the Bible. Then a second word is storge,
which is a word that refers to family love, like a mother
for the child and vice versa. Then there's phileo love, which
is a word that means a genuine, warm, intimate friendship. That is, it's love, but it's the
kind of love that friends would have toward each other,
but genuine love at that. And then, of course, the
last word is agape love. And that is--in essence,
it means sacrificial love. Because is there any
such thing as true, genuine love
until, first of all, I deny myself in
behalf of the other person. So I would simply ask you this:
Who do you love sacrificially? Who do you love beyond
want, need, desire, lust? Who do you love beyond
those four descriptions? Well, it's interesting what
Jesus says here because He deals with love on a whole different
level than we think about it. And as we said before, love
is the denial of oneself in behalf of someone else. So, look at this, first of
all, Jesus commands us to love one another. And how many times He said
that in just one verse: love one another, love one
another, love one another. In every single
one of these verses, Jesus uses the word agape
love, sacrificial love. It's the love that
put Him on the cross. It's the love in first
Corinthians thirteen, which is the love chapter. It's the love when it comes
to the Fruit of the Spirit. It's the love that
Jesus always talked about, loving one another. He talked about
sacrificial love, not just a light friendship. And I think in today, when
there's so much hurt and so much pain and so many people
suffering loss of all different kinds, not only from finances
to their loved ones in war. We ought to
understand what true, genuine love is all about. Because when we do, our
relationship with God is different, our relationships
with each other are different. They're far more
meaningful, far more satisfying, and far more rewarding. So what did He mean by that? Well, when He used this
word sacrificial here, or the other word, agape, He
also said to them that He was giving them a new commandment. Well, that's not new. For example, in
Deuteronomy the sixth chapter, He says we're to love the
Lord God with all of our heart, soul, mind, and body. That is, is total love. And so what was new about this? Here's what was new about it:
what was new about this love is that it was to be a
sacrificial love, a love that put
other people first. Not just loving God. Not just loving each other
with a nominal kind of a little, light love, but true, genuine, sacrificial,
that's what He was telling them to love each other that way. And so, it was a
different kind of love. So He wasn't saying that it was
new in light of that no one had ever said it before. But it was new because He
raised the standard. He lifted up high. It was God's kind of love
that was a whole different understanding for them. And when I think about that and
I think about what He said in this passage, "Love one another,
even as I have loved you." Now, what in the
world does that mean? That we're to love each
other as He loved His disciples. We know that His was not
just a little brotherly love, it was a sacrificial love. And what He's saying is this:
He says we are to love each other sacrificially. And He said we're
to love the Lord, we're to love each other, and
we are to love our enemies. Now, when it comes
to loving your enemy, that puts a whole
different light on it. For example, if I
should say to you today, "Do you love people that
you know are your enemies?" You may give me some
religious answer, "Oh, sure." But deep down
inside you think, "Yeah, no, I don't really love them." It's difficult to
love some people. In fact, some people make it
difficult for you to love them. And when we find people
who would destroy us, we say, "Am I
supposed to love them?" Listen carefully, there is a
difference in loving a person as a person and loving their ways
and their ambitions and their desires that are
ungodly and destructive. We're not required to love
the ways of the ungodly. And I'm not required
to love their actions, their deeds, their
motives, and all the rest. Would we want to see
every person saved? Yes, no matter how mean
and vicious and wicked and vile they are. Are we required to
love their ways? Absolutely not. And so, when Jesus said
we're to love as He loved, that's the way He loved. No--for example, I think about
how they responded and how Jesus responded to them. It was always selflessly. He wasn't saying, "Do this
for Me, do that for Me." He said, "I want--I love you and
I want you to love one another like I love you," not thinking
of myself but thinking about the other person. When you say I
love you to someone, what do you
really and truly mean? Do you mean I care for you? I'm thinking about you? I want what's best for you? And I want to do whatever I
can to help you to become the person you ought to be? Or are you thinking about
what it's going to get you? You see, selfless love
isn't centered on self. It's selfless. It's you that's important. It's the other person.
How you feel? What happens to you?
What are your needs? Not what I think they are. But what are they? That's the way He loved. A second way He loved is
this: He loves understandingly. Thank God He does.
What do I mean by that? Simply this, when Jesus
loved those disciples of His, and He said we're
to love as He did, He loved them
with understanding. He understood
that they were weak, at times they were afraid. They were frail
in their emotions. He understood them, for example,
when He would watch how they responded in certain
situations and circumstances. He loved them understandingly. That is, He didn't ramp up
this big list of things that He expected of them and, when
they failed, criticize them. He understood
where they came from. He understood their background. And I think oftentimes people
who are judgmental of others, if they could just look behind
their faces and see where they came from, how they grew
up, how they were treated. Never loved, shoved
around, mistreated, rejected. When you see people who
come from those circumstances, don't expect them to come
pouring out genuine love upon you when they
don't even know how. Jesus understood. He understood
Peter, for example, who was a
strong-willed fisherman. And He had to bring him
down to himself a few times. What was He doing?
Was He criticizing him? No.
He was understanding Him. And when Peter said,
"Lord, how many times shall I forgive my brother? Seven times?" You know, a little bit
prideful about that. And Jesus had to say, knowing
where Peter came from and knowing that even a couple of
times it would have been hard for him probably. And He said,
"Seventy times seven." He understood where
he was coming from. He understood his
emotional makeup. And I think oftentimes we
have expectations of people, and if we could just look
beyond the surface, we would understand why
they treat us the way they do. Understanding people and
being willing to understand them is very important. If I'm going to love somebody
and love them with genuine love and truly caring for them, I'm
going to ask the question: Where do they come from? What's going on in their life? Did they come from a
family where they felt rejected and unloved? There're going to
be consequences. You have to ask yourself the
question: Am I willing to love this person for better or worse? Well, God loves you and me
for better or for worse. And all of us would
have to say sometimes, God, it's worse. Because we're not perfect. We're all emotional beings. We're affected by
different things. So how did He love? He loved, as we
said, for example, in this particular
passage, selflessly. And He loved understandingly. And He loved also forgivingly. A person who genuinely loves
is forgiving no matter what. You say, "Yeah, but you
don't know what they did." How many times have you gone to
God and asked Him to forgive you for the same thing over
and over and over again? Did He ever say, "One
more time and you're out"? No. You went to Him over and
over and over again and He forgave you. Think about this: What right,
what right do you and I have not to forgive somebody for
anything when God has forgiven us continuously? I remember the first
time it really hit me, and I was teaching
in a Bible institute. And all the
guys were pastors. And one of them came to me one
day and he said--he was getting ready to go into the jail
to witness to a person. So I said, "Well, who
is this person?" He said, "He's the man who
killed my mother last week drinking while he was driving." There is no point at which you
and I are not to be forgiving. You can't name anything. And when I think about
people who are unforgiving, I think about this
because it's true, an unforgiving person
is a miserable person. They're unhappy. They have no peace. We say we reap
what we sow, more than we sow, and
later than we sow. When you sow unforgiveness,
you reap the results of unforgiveness, which is
a lot of things that happens in a person's life. And how did Jesus love? He loved forgivingly. How is He loving in me today? Unconditionally and forgivingly. No matter what you and
I do as His children, He's willing to forgive us
because that's who He is. And He says, "Now,
this is the way I want you to love other people." So that being the case, you
and I have no grounds for an unforgiving spirit. None whatsoever. How did He love? He loved sacrificially, and
that's how He could say that you and I are to
forgive one another, and that the
highest form of love, the highest form of love is to
love someone to the point of laying down our life for them. So you're saying, "Well, do you
mean to tell me that if my love is to really be
true and genuine, that I got to give
my life to them?" Well, let's just
see what He said. The highest form of love
is to lay down your life for someone else. Now, that's exactly what He did. Listen, whatever it took for
Jesus to bring about redemption, that is the extent
to which He went, which was to the cross. And He says it's the
highest form of love. And I think about all these
men over all these past years, in all the wars that we fought. How many men were willing to lay
down their life because of what they believed, because
of their convictions, because of their love either
for God or for the country or whatever it might be? And the truth is,
there is sacrifice in all true, genuine love. And so, how did He love? He loved in all
of these fashions. And sometimes that kind of
love brings a lot of pain. It can bring
rejection, heartache. I think about people who live
in marriages where you cannot please the other person. You cannot be
acceptive of the person. They do not know how
to love the person. Everything about
the relationship, it seems, is one-sided. All the love comes from one side
and none comes from the other. What are you supposed to do? Say, "That's the end of that, no
more forgiveness, I'm gone"? "I love you not till death but
till I find somebody that'll love me in return." That is selfishness
to the highest degree. I'm not getting what I want
so I'll find what I want, not that I will
demonstrate true, genuine love to you. He loves us sacrificially. Now, you are saying, "Well, does
that mean that I--for me to love like Jesus wants me to love,
that I'm to die? I'm to love somebody
till it just kills me?" Well, sometimes you may
think you are dying every day. And you remember what He said
in Mark that eighth chapter? Listen to this
thirty-fourth verse, "He summoned the
crowd with His disciples, and said to them, 'If
anyone wishes to come after Me, he must deny himself, and take
up his cross and follow Me.'" Now, what is He saying? He's saying in our
lives, we--the believer, must live a life of self-denial. And oftentimes true, genuine
loves demands self-denial. You're in a
marriage, for example, or relationship
that's very difficult. It's stormy every single day. He says sacrificial love
is willing to hang in there no matter what. That's not the way we think,
but it's the way Jesus taught. He says, "That's the
way I love," and He says, "You're to love
even as I love." Now, let's think
about this for a moment, when He says that
in this passage, the truth is, it's, watch this,
it's impossible for us to love exactly like Jesus loved. Now, watch this carefully,
because His love was a substitutionary, atoning love. He came into this world
for the primary purpose of laying down His life. His love was a
substitutionary love. That is, He was to die a
substitutionary death so that you and I may live. It was an atoning
love, an atoning death. He had to die and give His
life in order that you and I would be forgiven of our sin. He paid our price. And what is--
justification is all about? God declaring us just and
no longer guilty because of the price Jesus paid. Now, you and I
can't--we can't do that. That was a one-time thing,
and there's no copying of His kind of love. But the element of
His love, which was sacrifice, we can copy. And when He says, "You're to
love even as I have loved you," that's what He's talking about. It is a sacrificial love. Now, when I think about that and
I think about the fact that we can't love exactly like
He loved in that light. Then how can I
love sacrificially? What does it mean to
love sacrificially? Here's what it means, it means
whatever is required of me as a follower of Jesus to love you. That is, to give myself to you,
to help you to do whatever I can for your sake, then it's my
responsibility to do it. You say, "Well,
does that mean give, give, give, give, give? Watch this carefully,
wisely in a disciplined fashion and carefully. Just giving to someone
everything they ask for is not love. That's why you don't
give your children everything they ask for. You know that you're
to give to them wisely. When it comes to loving someone,
it doesn't mean give them everything they want. It means to give them
what is wise to give them. Because remember, selfless
love is for the sake of the other person,
it's for their good. So as I think about what it
means to lay down your life, as Jesus said, the
highest form of love, then how do we do that? There's no greater love
than self-denying love. So let's think
about it in this light, it means I'm to love
somebody unconditionally. Let's say that you're in a
marriage but nothing is right, you can't please, criticism,
rejection, disloyalty. If I love that person
unconditionally and I love them sacrificially, as Jesus
loved, I'm not going to say, "Well, it's too bad,
this is enough of this. I'm gone.
I'm out of here." If I'm looking out for
the other person's good, I'm going to
demonstrate genuine, godly forgiveness and love. And how many people have
been won to Christ by a loving husband or a loving wife? Or by a loving friend
who was mistreated? Because you see, when you think
about what love is all about, it's very serious business. It was so serious with Jesus, He
said it three times in those two verses, love one
another, love one another, love one another sacrificially. And when one person
does that, it is powerful. Whether it's in a family or
whether it's in a war zone. It's powerful when someone lays
down their life for the other. And I think about the Lord
Jesus who went to the cross. It was God coming to earth in
the person of Jesus Christ, dying on the cross, motivated by
one single thing: unconditional, divine, supernatural, awesome
love for every one of us. And He says, "That's the
kind of love I want you to do for each other." You may be listening or
watching wherever you are, and I would simply ask you the
question: Have you ever felt loved by somebody? Really loved? Is there anybody that you
could name that you truly, genuinely love
them sacrificially? If not, you're
missing something in life. Because you see, without
love, life will never be what it could be. And unless it's the right kind
of love, genuine, sacrificial love, that's when
love reaches it's summum bonum, its highest form. And that's when the happiness
and the joy and the peak, listen, the peak of fulfillment
is only available where there is sacrificial love. And it is my prayer that if
you've never trusted Jesus Christ, that you will,
because you'll never understand and feel and experience
that kind of love until you experience His forgiveness,
the new life that He gives, and the eternal rewards that'll be
yours because you've responded to His love. And you say, "Well,
how do I do that?" You acknowledge your sinfulness. You ask Him to forgive you not
based on what you deserve or how good you're going to be, but
based on the fact that He went to the cross,
sacrificially died, paying your sin
debt and mine in full. And the moment
you're willing to receive Him, to accept Him
as your personal Savior, that moment,
listen, His awesome, divine forgiveness absolutely,
totally fills your life. And that
forgiveness is there forever. It would rather be foolish not
to enjoy the love of God and fight your way through
life never feeling truly, divine love. It's inexplainable.
It's indescribable. I wouldn't even try to
explain it or describe it. Let's put it this way, it's
the most fulfilling thing in all of life. And that is my desire for you. And Father, how grateful
we are for the wonderful, beautiful life of Jesus. And the way He loved and
the way He taught us to love. I pray the Holy Spirit has and
will continue to speak to every heart that hears this
message wherever and in whatever language, that we
understand how much you love us. And we understand the potential
we have of loving someone else likewise, and
being loved in return. And we ask it in
Christ's name, amen. ♪♪♪
