Nichols and May Take Two

hello Arthur this is your mother I want to tell you right here now Bobby you're very very good-looking little kid you really are I'm speaking as one human being to another forget that you're an operator I'm a super right welcome to longdesc can I help you yes I read your ad I'm interested in the $65 funeral they were geniuses they would be too best at what they did you would try desperately in your own mind to keep up with them and to see where they were going and they were always lightyears ahead they had an intellectual bent to stand up and a sensibility that to that time really wasn't around it's improvisational it's intelligent it's talking about where we live and what we're doing in a wonderfully mocking way they did things that were you know taboo by that by the standards in those days without shying from it adultery was not addressed in those days but they did it Louise were were you I've been going out of my mind this was not the kind of thing you did but they did it she'll be doing this terrible thing to be late on top of it all the sexual tension or you know their brains are fertile with anxiety and I say that the most affectionate way they would uncover little dark niches that you felt but never had expressed they expressed it for you never felt so cheap just think how I feel think how I feel George is my best friend around they were totally adventurous and totally innocent in a certain sense that's why it was accepted there was a kind of social vice that was existing around certain things you simply didn't talk about sexual behavior you know it was a it was a an era that was conspicuous for its dullness you must remember that in the 1950s in the early 1960s America celebrated those conventional institutions and conventional ways of life in an exaggerated fashion I think America took itself very seriously it was it was genuinely the Eisenhower years and it was also a country reeling under the weight of what had happened with the McCarthy period remember this is civil rights days concern about the nuclear bomb and yet the country was simply not dealing with it I think that we were held in thrall up until this point and this was the beginning of the bust out my idol he was my image yeah well thank heaven for the investigation oh yeah when I feel worst I say to myself at least the government has taken a firm stand oh well they can't fool around with this the way they did with integration yeah it's a moral issue yeah yeah it is a moral issue our age to me that's always so much more interesting than a real issue yeah clearly they they were a new spirit a new voice and the new irreverence in television there was a marvelous moment and I think perhaps historically one can even from a fairly grand view say that it it's from these kind of artists the genuine social change takes place President Eisenhower reassures the nation that Russia's success with the first satellite does not indicate a serious like an American rocket research while the latest Russian satellite has sent a dog into space our satellite program seems dogged with failure the upsetting loss of six rockets last year doesn't phase dr. Wernher von Braun who along with 100 other German v2 rocket scientists are now heading up America's guided missile program and helping to keep America free hey I'm home that's good boy am i starved oh well now you look pushed all day at the laboratory I said to myself I can't wait to get home to some little woman's cooking come take off your shoes and put on your slippers and we watch some TV I'm so happy our country is going ahead now faster dearest in the arms race we Americans are doing better every day only today we took a giant step and Thor Ben God is looking better if America our country goes along like this soon darling we will lose the world yeah today America tomorrow the world they were like music and like I said as introduced the mountain record that it was something like a song you could hear it over and over and over and appreciate how one thing went into another like a like a melody it's beautiful as a fantastic piece yes it's serene it has a kind of mathematical certainty that's almost essential to me yes an order of finality I used to listen to those records you know over and over and over I used to play them at night and go to sleep to them would sit and late at night doing the kind of what passed for South Dakota beatnik thing of you know burning some crayons into a coke bottle and trying to make a candle out of it dimming the lights and listening to nickels in May and it was like a voice from another planet somehow what a shock when I when I discovered nature and he said that annoying in many ways when I read the spake Zarathustra yes I had never known such things exist yes I had never actually heard someone deliver irony just in the tone of their voice and sarcasm and satire there was something in the tone that was very very new scalpel scalpel oh my god oh my god anymore cause we don't have any more guys that's all guys yeah I don't know what happened we had a small role of gardeners sponge sponge clamp you have the clamp suture yeah he did yeah I love you one thing that really distinguished them from what had come before in terms of comedy teams is that they were still that it was verbal I don't even know where they recorded half these things in some ways it was like radio because you could supply you know the images you could supply the characters they were doing in your head you like Andre kostelanetz mr. Loomis I really listened mostly to semi-classical yes yeah yep me too I just got a whole castle honest thing playing footlight favorites a lot of the semi-classical I really love music I mean I don't understand it but I know what I like I like to play it for you if you're interested I don't know you know I can just hop up there and give it a whirl but you apartment yeah right you know my wife is up at in the month and she goes every summer she goes up to London and I oh yeah you know I just rattle around in a big apartment all by myself as an awful nice record I just thought the phrase mob and snob appeal is very apt because it was so intelligent their use of language their appearance their style had snob appeal a pop population Gentiles what is very very dear friends called Hemingway I was just talking to a very very dear friend of his and mine this is very old very close very wonderful right Albert Schweitzer I love to have him on the show he's always ready with a quip you know I haven't seen the old son of a gun for a while I think he's in Africa you know I told him al baby you are nuts there is no money in Africa he why don't we haven't heard from him since what he says with you mm oh so al isn't asked well you know I what is there to say about our look right now I personally have never dated him I hear the aware more sophisticated audience of course appreciated them had multiple levels that perhaps others didn't very oh very close very this is very good very wonderful friends good kid I love I tell you the thing about a bird is not like a lot of your philosophies but that I mean he's not pushy you know and that is a terrific thing to see we're all crazy about that what do you think we are as I am concerned personally I think that a pushy philosopher is always a drag it never got smarter it never got Whittier it never get in fact the first thing to go was the wind after Nichols in May I don't that's funny I know it's very smart but but that's death to comedy I think it was just plain funny the most talented people among Michael Delaine to do something for Mike Nichols and Elaine mayor yes tonight is the quintessential southern writer mr. Alabama glass I love you Polly jack there was a wonderful skin about Truman Capote or Tennessee Williams but there was absolutely breathtaking there was one line in that I can't remember not the action of the play begins Mammoth's husband Rao has committed suicide I'm being unjustly accused of not being homosexual I'm just accused of not being a homosexual that was healthy I have been going with the same man for the last 14 years last week I got the shock of my life there sitting at a sidewalk cafe with my intended with another woman I asked him what was the meaning of this in reply they both stood up and gave me such a merciless beating was so broad so broadly appealing to the to anybody you know I mean when they talked about mothers they talked about your mother as well as theirs hello this is your mother do you remember me mom I was just going to call you is that a funny thing you know that I had my hand are you supposed to call me last Friday honey I know I just didn't have a second and I could cut my throat I was working on all day Friday night darling I was in the lab all day Saturday but in all day Sunday mom and your father finally said to me Phyllis eat something you'll faint I said no Harry no I don't want my mouth to be full in my son and you never call mother I was sending up a rocket I didn't have a second well it's always something isn't it all right you know Arthur I'm sure that all the other scientists fair have mothers and I'm sure that they all find time after their breakfast before they count off down to pick up a phone and call them you know how I worry well that's the point I read in the paper that you're still losing them mother mother I don't lose them my mind listen what if they're taking it out of his pay I'm sick I'm sorry to hear it what's wrong nothing well you know what it is art there yeah it's the same thing it's always been yeah sure yeah it's my name I went to the doctor and he tells me he said listen mrs. wine you are a very nervous very high cloud woman or what God knows that's true you cannot stand the slightest aggravation No so I said doctor I know that I know you know I do I said yeah but you see doctor I have this son and he's very busy and it's the truth he is he's busy I said you see doctor he's too busy to pick up a phone and call his mother mom honey I want you to tell me when I said that to him that man turned pale right mother he said mrs. white I have been a doctor for 35 years darling and I've never heard of a sudden too busy to call his mother I know mommy that's what he said to me I think I know and that man is a doctor mother please would tell me what did the doctors say they're going to do with you no I may be in the hospital for a while hospital but what are they gonna do x-ray my nerves why don't you let me know please listen about you how is your hangnail mother listen to me please please just don't worry I what does that mean honey what does that mean don't worry well nothing actually I just I don't know I said the first thing that came into my head listen to me either I'm a mother yeah well that's the thing listen what's the use of talking you know you're very young someday someday honey you'll get married mom and you'll have children of your own please and honey when you do I only pray that they make you suffer the way you're amazing that's all I pray Isis that's a mother's prayer okay mom thanks for calling you're very sarcastic mother I am doing my best here now you call I tried to explain to you that I was busy I don't mean I'm sorry I'm sorry that I bothered you when you were so busy believe me I won't be around to bother you much longer and listen I hope I didn't make you feel bad are you kidding I feel awful oh honey if I could believe that I'd be the happiest mother well mother what do you think I feel rotten oh then I Arthur honey why don't you call me honey you know I know that I made you you got a nagging mother what are you gonna do you know you're my baby and listen you're the only baby I've got tell you something when you when you get to be a hundred years old you're still gonna be my baby and when you don't call me honey I can't help it I just I worry and if that's so hard to just pick up a phone and call your mommy is it you do you make your mommy so happy my mommy happy and I'm happy thank you baby and mommy went to wish you lots of luck with your Roxy thank you mommy and you remember that him mommy love you goodbye baby television made them a national attraction overnight because the whole nation saw what we would see in a little cabaret and people had never seen this it just took over completely and the press were just completely totally knocked out and suddenly they were like overnight stars what you were seeing on television with Mike and Elaine was really quite daring it was a breakthrough it was a level that simply hadn't been expressed in public terms before in front of an audience or on television I mean they were in the swim then as new young stars was a wonderful show and it's produces I had asked Mike and Elaine to come on and that was the beginning of the career of Nichols in May ladies and gentlemen this my great privilege to congratulate on behalf of all of you here the winners verse five and may I say that on an evening like this were very proud to be Americans we recognize how fortunate we are fortunate that these men and women can say what they believe and if you who listen to them if you don't like it can turn to another channel thank you and good night Elaine May of the comedy team of Mike Nichols and Elaine May ladies and gentlemen I am very proud to be able to protect the next award it is a special award better not only in the it's not listed tonight in any of the categories but also in that it's the first award of its kind everything presented by the exhibitors there will be a lot set each night about excellence and the creative the artistic and the skillful will be recognized in the industry who go on year-in year-out quietly and assumingly producing garbage chosen by the Academy to present tonight's special award to the man who invented the mouse turtle mediocrity industry this is the proudest moment of my life not easy I know I didn't firstly no matter what suggestion is the sponsor make I take him Paul I think I have tried to send no one anywhere on earth producing we have received not one letter of any time seemingly creating garbage it's probably the most you know the best of what's takeoff I'd ever seen and it really has this kind of because the way he goes all the way through and the award and being that overly sincere and admitting the mediocrity in the best way you can and and he has that look that way before prozac you know twenty five years before just happy to be a flaming when I saw that piece I thought gee I could use this how old is this tape who remembers it someone told me that they cut it on the west coast where would have the most impact or the least where people think damn it is right oh he's making fun of us however smart at God it always stayed funny and never got smug and that's so you had a lot of smart people talking about it and you could approach it from a smart place but you could also approach it from a dumb place forgive me dearest your snoring Claudine are you crazy I wasn't even sleeping I was lying here resting darling you were just snoring just lying interesting I really wasn't sure I wasn't even asleep I can did you just what I'm thinking I was thinking I was thinking goodness it's dark now that they put the streetlights out that's what I was thinking that was the last thought I thought before you shook me I'm sorry honey honey honey honey honey I'm so sorry you're just driving me crazy you're snoring like I've never heard anybody snow what is this a joke what is this angel Street come on I'm sorry what are you trying to do you were snoring I was not smoothly I wasn't sleeping you're just a moment ago spoke to me I'm wide awake all right father I'm sorry I said all right all right when I first became aware of Mike and Elaine they were doing what they had done back at the second city sills started a company in Chicago called second city and it was basically a bunch of very bright students from mostly from the University of Chicago and out of second city out of campus came all of these people near they were all in one place doing startling things and always inventive and perhaps most startling of them all was that Electric combination of Mike and Elaine who besides being as good as anybody in this group had something else going for them which is their particular relationship which sparked set each other off mr. Loomis yes i'ma speak with you for a moment please were you coming to my office yes yes mrs. Kravitz tells me we've been coming into the office naked yes what can you explain yourself well I had the house office and there are no windows it's enormously warm in there and it's uncomfortable to work naked than with clothes I'm honest honest but you can't you can't walk through the offices naked yeah he's an insurance company you know working in a bank you know either Mike and Elaine wanted to leave second city and work as a team and they came to see me and in this little office they began to do improvisational comedy and I have never seen this technique before and they asked me to give them a line to start the sketch give them a line to end the sketch which I did and they got and they started started to do their improvisation and I was saying to myself my god I am finding two people that are writing hilarious hilarious comedy on their feet there was no reference no style that Mike and Elaine in particular couldn't run with was just astonishing open wide looks alright to me how did it feel feels alright have you tried chewing on that time no thank you you know you might just try chewing on that side not all the time of course just once or twice you see but the feeling would stay and I think it's ready I think I really went I need here I think I'll go somewhere than just chewing chewing you know what's happening don't you I think I do I never meant for it to happen nor did I yeah when you first came into my office and said those few sad words about the tiny tooth in the back of your mouth that was hurting you I think I knew even then that I felt something to that tooth I wasn't meant with you even though it is not only there with the cavity because dentists understand these things but because well because it was your cavity and I think even then I loved it there I said it I do love you winter no Reba you needn't go I have something to tell you I haven't wanted to tell you before we just seem to be there was just upsetting you but now I've got to tell you I'm going away dentist and a pygmy calling me I think it's best for devils have never seen a dentist I'm going with you two I'm going to Saudi Arabia to become a gentleman Reba Reba nothing about teeth I know I think in an IQ he won Saudi Arabians of dental hygiene if I have planned Reba Reba if it were possible if it could be that I have taught you something about Keith that you can it hasn't been wasted all that time in the rowboat talking about upper and lower molar and K guys Arriba Arriba I know now that I'm going to make those pygmies very happy because I'll be a happy generous the way they did a long set piece was by doing it on their feet and then like a sculptor they would take it away and build of course sometimes the improvisation you know didn't work as it should drink this wine getting smaller that's what they said in Japanese store when I bought it they said it would make you smaller and we'd have a much better you can't just be Alice in Wonderland of course I can you can all right drink this way I'm getting smaller and smaller you bet and smaller and smaller smaller smaller I guess I look like a pretty big bunny to you by now you want to get any bigger I'm not getting anything I know but I don't know how to thank you Springsteen was born to run they were born to improv seriously that's how I look at it and and it was just a perfect the routines were an outgrowth of their of their genius at improv you know even their television commercials to where improv coming pledges Haring in the lead with black with sugar behind followed by vacuum cleaner ambassador exam mrs. Adelman who was coming up fast neck-and-neck precious Harry now we take you into the actual winner's circle for the winner mrs. Adelman and the Jax representative mrs. Adelman is this the first horse race you've everyone yes well it was quite an exciting race from where we were in the stage yes I was surprised when they left me and Terry you ever trying Jack's beer yes I find it it's a mellow bright clear and light premium brewed 100% natural ingredients to give you a real birth taste which is wonderful and once I try Jack's I was just never again completely satisfied with any other beer I bet after a race like that you could use a can of Jack's I could use to mrs. Edelman will you be entering any more horse races it depends on mr. Adelman waitress yes can I help you yeah I'd like a glass of mellow Jax please premium brewed from a hundred percent natural ingredients Eve your real beer tastes a little bright clear and my chicks very good right and I'll have the chopped sirloin plate please no don't take the champs channel on take the chicken chicken yes okay take the roast chicken good thank you that's very kind of you I'll have the roast chicken and a nice green salad don't take this salad here let me give you a vegetable all right and the coconut custard pie don't take your pie take a pudding don't don't need to buy here to Christ is no good good five nine and and then the Jack's beer right away really thank you very much miss there's nobody listening dear okay well thanks mom nice alright honey only this time please tip me I saw Mike and Elaine do a sketch based on their indignation at a particularly outrageous American custom a custom which Jessica Mitford has since called a high cost of dying Mike Nichols and Elaine May welcome to longdesc can I help you yes I read your ad I'm interested in the $65 funeral was that for yourself no well another uh may I ask where did you catch that ad TV Guide just trying to find out where our trade comes from I am afraid that I'm going to have to ask you some questions alright alright can you tell me what was the loved ones named Seymour Maslow cream is that hyphenated it was and the loved ones address 44 1118 southeast Huguenot Walloon Drive oh and may I ask what your name is Charlie Charlie Charlie I'm miss Loomis your grief ladies is it Charlie Maslow Fleenor you're related well that will be $65 thank you I have the check all made up Oh wonderful before you go mr. Manzo FreeNAS I was just wondering would you be interested in some extras for the loved one what kind of extras well how about a casket it isn't that included in the funeral no we have to have a cast it looks better we have three prices one thousand two hundred and forty three dollars seven hundred and sixty eight dollars and $14.98 may I ask what what do those prices represent that's mahogany oak and nubby plywood nubby plywood tell me Oh what what kind of an appearance does that make cheap I'll take the yoke oh thank you very much I am so sorry to intrude this way I'm your grief I just wondered can you tell me how had you planned on getting mr. Maslow fling down here cab you're going to have to give the driver an enormous tip you know you don't happen to have a hearse do you yes we do for $35 I can give you an exquisite Cadillac slumber wagon now how about someone to drive it that's not included no is it alright we have to have a driver I can't drive it myself is that all just this is the last and I am I am once again truly sorry it is my job have you planned it all unvarying mr. mezzo Madame that was foremost in my mind you happen to have a plot no but I'm sure you do yes we view we have 824 dollars and 46 cents 490 $3.58 and ten dollars I'm just curious what happens but ten dollars we we have two men who come and take mr. Maslow clean away and do God knows you always run a little danger with satire and we occasionally ran into objections from sponsors Michael Elena's is widely known displeased the funeral industry but still they could never have gotten into the kind of trouble for an example that Lenny Bruce did he was really hitting things very hard whereas they work with a more delicate genteel approach I'm not sure why they were more effective than others I do think that it has something to do with the intelligence that they brought to it and knowing just where to stop short of the line of vulgarity Mort Sahl and Lenny Bruce and a number of others helped reshape the general sensibility of the younger generation of our generation at that time at the beginning of the sixties Alex Cohen the producer had the idea to do an evening of Mike Nichols and Elaine Leigh on Broadway those ancient days we used to have an audience in the theater that was young for one thing Nichols May at the Golden theatre talked about relationships it was the first time that a man and a woman or a boy and a girl and in a car or anywhere else actually talked about having sex making out never been done before the exquisite look of the two of them as the adolescent lovers in the car it was was the perfect look you know it was what you saw at that time that hair done immaculately that the behavior the tie that everything in place have you noticed um the lake and well it's just suicidally beautiful tonight okay really okay that's just I mean if you still fantastic I mean you know because I mean like um you look at that that like out there you know and you think you know like what is it that way and it's just it's just a lot of little water and then you put it all together and it's making tire light you know this that just knocks me off uh what do you were what were you doing back there along with you that that whole deal is very rough oh oh there is a full moon son of a gun it's okay okay it's really okay do you think you're gonna go to college I mean you know like ask your high school what then my old man wishes me to attend Rensselaer Polytechnic Institute see ya add a mr. extremely fine engineering department that's the field I'm gonna answer I figure if I can get a basketball scholarship you know oh you can so easily you get this great basketball player you you have an absolutely boy just build on you joking would you care to hit me in the stomach with my actual food you've got something in there you are as hard as an actual rock sorry so you think you're gonna go to college tuition and open the door for HIV I only get the car once a week oh oh well I mean I think that you know the girl likes the boy she'll ride on the bus the way I hear it every human being has I don't know what you mean I mean I don't know what you expected no I mean I don't know what George Green has told you about me but uh yes the way uh I figure is that uh I mean you go out with somebody you know on your first day and I mean you sort of I have to uh talk to do this time you have to get to know them write something you know and then uh later you know like when you go out you know like on your second date you ever ask me out again if you do the message a different thing then because uh you know that's a layer of like music I first day you need you know what you're gonna tell you what I know exactly what you're gonna say you want to know you think you're gonna say I wouldn't respect you right right look Kenny I want to tell you right here and now that I would you like crazy you can't even imagine how I would I'm here you wouldn't just be graceful I'm talking about respect can I ask you something okay this is some very hard question to ask so I would appreciate it really if you want to tell me the truth okay you like me oh yeah all right I do I do I just want you to know something I mean I I really like you I mean I know cannot believe it I've never done this before with a boy I really haven't I mean I really like you do you think you're gonna go to college when you you know I think they set the standard and then they had to move on because they were directors and writers they were nervously successful individually they didn't need each other in that sense but the fact that they didn't work together anymore has always seemed a true misfortune for all the rest of us I think that there's no generation that would have seen them that would not have fallen in love with them a hundred years from now if if people could see the this this team work it would be no difference no different

Channel: keywslt

Views: 75,885

Rating: 4.8903317 out of 5

Keywords: Nichols And May (Musical Artist)

Id: K7-2hZylOoM

Length: 54min 44sec (3284 seconds)

Published: Tue Oct 20 2015