Mom & Stepdad Secretly Run Away For Romantic Vacation & Left Me Babysit 7Kids With No Money For Food

i female 18 have two little sisters my mom had an affair four years ago which caused my parents divorce and she later remarried her husband he has five kids my mom never even gave us a chance to get to know them or anything we were forced to move into a bigger house and call them family i still live with my mom due to my dad being in and out of the hospital i could never live with him now we can't even visit him because he's high risk so we're still figuring out how we can see him without risking his health my mom pulled a stunt last monday she left with her husband for a week to have them time she didn't say anything to me nor any of the other kids until i called her asking where she was she didn't even leave any money for us to shop for food yes she left during such terrible global situation she returned literally an hour ago 12 am and i blew up at her because i missed work all week and might get fired i missed practice and risked getting kicked off the team and the three oldest kids not my bio sisters were so terribly behaved the entire week i told her they're not my responsibility for one and she knows i'm not comfortable babysitting anyone's kids except my sisters i told her the next time she and her husband wanted them time to lock themselves in their room rather than leaving and being inconsiderate she started crying and said i'm making her feel like a bad mom when she didn't do anything wrong my aunt called me and said i'm grown and need to get over my little girl feelings and apologize to my mom because i was so mean for no reason i said i had a reason to be mean and i wasn't apologizing i'm only now writing this because i feel like maybe i was over the top and wrong so am i the idiot i didn't think to call cps and i'm hoping she doesn't do it again so i don't have to call them plus i think they tell who makes a report and i don't want to go through that i am saving to move out but i'm back some money because i had to come out of pocket to order food the first few days then buy groceries i also don't want to leave my sisters until at least my baby sister is nearly adult my cousin anne's daughter has joined in and called me a child she's 20 and a bad daughter for making my mom feel bad about having fun my step-siblings by a mom has her own problems you are not the idiot your mother was incredibly irresponsible you have no obligation to tend to your younger siblings or the stepkids those children are her and her husband's responsibility by leaving them like that she was certainly behaving like a bad mom honestly you would have been within your rights to call social services and report abandoned children because that is what she did she just walked away from a bunch of small children without making any sort of arrangements for their care she didn't even leave food for them that is a failure of her most basic duty as a mother you are your own person you're not an extension of her you don't have to fill in for her whenever she feels like abdicating mother duties you are not the idiot you're still in school and being made to babysit seven children and she has the audacity to say you were mean for being upset at her being in trouble with work isn't a little girl problem either my parents would ask if i would watch my little sister not just dip and not say anything this is absolutely wild you are not wrong leaving without saying word and even without leaving some money for food is bad parenting they are not young lovers anymore where running away is easy and romantic she has a lot of children and a lot of responsibility bailing out for a week without any word money for the kids is highly neglectful your mom has to feel bad so she realizes what she's done ignore your aunt she seems to not be on a healthy level when she thinks leaving a couple of children alone a week out of the blue with no money is normal behavior for a mother if she's so concerned about you hurting your mother's feelings tell her she's welcome to come over and care for the kids herself in the future my 34 female daughter's father 35 and i are about a year and a couple months out from our divorce my daughter had a birthday last weekend she has her permit but she's been struggling with parallel parking and she's obsessed with the idea of passing the driver's test on the first attempt her dad has been the person who sits next to her when she practices driving because ever since he lost his job two years ago he hasn't been able to find full-time work meanwhile my fiance and i are extremely busy working together at his business my daughter asked her dad if he could get a car for her because many of her friends at her new school rang in their birthdays with new bmws my ex-husband said to both my daughter and me that he thinks it's ridiculous to buy a car when one doesn't have a license yet and that she needs a lot more practice with parking in the freeway because he also hopes she passes on the first try my daughter was very upset after taking a drive with me in the passenger seat i found that she seemed to be improving she was having a birthday party at her paternal grandparents place since my fiance's house that we live in right now was due to be staged for sale that same weekend many of her friends and their moms who i am friends with were going to be there taking pictures and having fun i know that social life is very important for a high schooler and i feel like even things that happen on instagram are taken really seriously so i discussed it with my fiance and he said that it was no problem to pick out a car for her and surprise her so come the day of the party after my daughter opens her gifts from her friends her stepfather comes in to make an appearance and gives her a box in which we wrapped the keys to an audi my daughter started screaming and hugging the both of us and her friends and their moms were all saying what a wonderful surprise and told her to get in so they could take pictures of the birthday princess my ex-husband pulled both of us aside and said this was disrespectful to him and his wishes and making him look like this stingy loser to our daughter made us the idiots he called my fiance a disneyland authority figure when he said something regarding our daughter he said i should either voice my disagreement with him because if i stay silent why would he assume anything other than i agreed with his call as a co-parent i told my ex-husband that i thought this was sour grapes and that i had the right to do anything i wanted with my money am i the idiot for making my daughter happy you are the idiot for many reasons one of the biggest is creating a spoiled brat because social media is important when did we become a culture that follows everyone else seriously what is wrong with you also the biggest reason she hasn't passed her test she needs help parking and she needs practice on the freeway do you know what happens to beginner drivers when they're inexperienced on the freeway they die cars aren't toys and you literally just implanted the idea in her mind that a car is expendable more so her life you bought your daughter who can't drive an audi and you did it just to impress the other moms and you did it against your other parents wishes if this is real then you are definitely the idiot it seems like you did something incredibly reckless and dangerous for your daughter just for the likes you are so wrong you are the idiot this was absolutely done to spite your ex-husband and make yourself and your fiance look good you're worried about your instagram story what shouldn't you be worried about her driving her grades etc your ex is right you did this despite him co-parenting is a thing look it up p.s no kid needs a bmw or an audi all this started two days ago the day before yesterday schools are open in our area i live in a three-bedroom house my husband and i rent one and the other two are rented by a couple and their three kids two are little and oldest son is nearly adult we have a mini fridge in our room and use it to store things we don't want the others to have access to like drinks we have a lot of it the locks on the doors are really bad they're just those inside doors you can open with a bobby pin and the landlord won't let us change them my husband and i were in the backyard and our door was locked from the inside unbeknownst to us our roommate's oldest son unlocked our door and snuck inside he stole 11 bottles i didn't notice until i got a drink that night the next day yesterday i asked my roommate about it she told me that she and her husband don't drink and our kids are angels and would never do something like that however yesterday night her son snuck out around 10 when he was supposed to be asleep she didn't find out until he came home drunk at 2 am she asked him where he was how he got drunk and where that drink came from he fessed up and told her that he got it from our room when we were outside this morning she comes to tell me and tells me about what happened i foolishly believing that she's going to apologize tell her that it's not a problem and kids do stupid things sometimes instead she tells me that it's my fault for tempting him by having drinks she says that i need to get rid of all the drinks in my room because her little angel is tempted to drink because of that i tell her it's my room and the lease specifically states that we can't go in each other's rooms without permission she said that he's just a kid and it's our responsibility as adults to keep him away from bad things once again i tell her that i'm not responsible for her son and i will not throw away a mini-fridge full of drinks because he can't keep his hands to himself she says i'm an idiot for having drinks in a home where children also live and it could really harm her younger children if they get to it they could even die if they drink enough of it am i the idiot not the idiot call the police that's a lot of booze and this kid needs to learn some harsh consequences because clearly the parents do not have an appropriate sense of who's to blame here and complained to the landlord they broke the terms of the lease demand a proper lock on your door and at minimum an official warning and send her an invoice for the booze her angelic kid stole you are not wrong you are not the idiot she's using you as a scapegoat for her son's bad behavior you are the victim here her son stole from you he made a conscious choice to go into a locked room that he knew he wasn't allowed to go into and take the belongings of the residents of that room by not placing the blame where it belongs on the sun she is condoning the sun's behavior and saying that what he did isn't wrong she is literally victim-blaming she is teaching her son that when he does something illegal that his mother will protect him from the consequences of his actions you are not the idiot your housemate is casting about for someone to blame for her son's thievery so she doesn't have to look in the mirror i would contact an attorney though is the landlord's refusal to provide or permit you to install working locks on your doors legal in your area this is not a good situation i might look into getting a refrigerator with a lock as well this kid isn't going to stop particularly if his mother is this enabling so i 28 male am a pro athlete i'm decently successful and own my own home my current house is my dream house it has a single floor so it's not too big but it has three rooms and a living room and a dining room i have one room as my bedroom i have the second room converted into a home gym and i used the third room as a super good gaming room each of my specialized rooms is perfect for my purposes my game room has a pc with a great monitor a ps4 waiting on the ps5 upgrade with a high quality tv my gym has great equipment and is perfect for the off season i also have a decent sized yard and two dogs with plans for a third i have a decent sized friend group who i invite over frequently and often have sleepovers with this typically isn't planned we don't drink but we just talk a lot and sometimes watch movies and end up falling asleep recently my sister got into college near where i live when she told me the news she told me how great it was that we're going to live together again i told her i had no space but she told me we could convert our gym into a bedroom for her complete with a desk this irked me because i love living alone i like being able to get up and leave whenever i want i like being able to watch whatever i want on the tv without judgment or scrutiny i like not having to consider other people now there are a number of examples i could give where my sister is just a plain bad roommate she doesn't exactly take care of other people's things when she borrows them and she feels entitled to them if they're in the same house as her she also has a habit of inviting people over without permission and forethought which i obviously dislike she is also a gamer and would like to play games on my console and pc i obviously do not want her to do that because knowing her she'd probably break it or she'd grow so attached to it she thinks it's her property at that point she does a hundred other things which i don't like but you get the point now i told my sister all of this and she started off on me she started yelling about how because i play for a living i should help out people who actually have to work for money she told me that i need to care for my family my parents are staying out of it and saying that we're both adults and can figure this out for ourselves they say if i don't let cis live with me they'll pay for on-campus lodging but she'd have to have a roommate which she doesn't want am i the idiot not the idiot i love how she doesn't want to live with a roommate but it's fine to force you to have one if she doesn't want a roommate tell her that you completely empathize with her as you feel the same way you are not the idiot here as soon as she said op didn't work for his money he should have hung up someone who doesn't value what you do for a living has no business staying under your roof you are not wrong she doesn't want a roommate clearly hasn't spotted that she would have one if she moved in with you which may mean she's assuming she can live as she likes because family plus there is the entitlement implied by telling you how to arrange your living space for her stand your ground just maybe treat her to clearly defined visits and stay overs when she's local it's always a bad sign when they act like it's done deal when they so well know you never discussed an arrangement you are not wrong don't let her move in especially with such global situation you might not be able to evict her so this situation happened a year ago but still causes problems i female42 was married to my ex john 44 for 10 years and we split about seven years ago we have one daughter together alex nearly adult when john and i split it was pretty messy which i still feel guilty about because it was hard on alex we basically got together several times after splitting up and the last time we got back together we got a dog maisie i did not like dogs did not want a dog and only got this stupid dog because jon wanted it after six months john and i split for the final time and i fell in love with the stupid puppy and she became my baby maisie turned me into a huge dog lover and i became one of those people who used to do photo shoots with my girls alex and maisie and referred to myself as mummy when i called maisie to me judge me if you want but maisie was the best dog ever and wormed her way into my heart john was not the best when we split and although we remained fairly civil he and alex did not see each other very much john also showed very little interest in maisie he would occasionally take maisie when he picked alex up for the weekend but as maisie got older and her health became more difficult to manage she stayed with me 24 7. so maisie got sick very suddenly a year ago it turned out that she had a stroke i took her to the vets in the morning and got the call in the afternoon that we needed to put her down i was absolutely devastated and so was alex i collected alex from school and we went to the vets together and spent the last 30 minutes with maisie and stayed with her while the vet put her to sleep here's where i might be the idiot it didn't occur to me to call john to say we were putting maisie down until after we were leaving the vets alex and i were really emotional but i did ask her if she wanted to call her dad alex told me no and said he'd never really liked maisie anyway which i don't think was true because alex liked all dogs but he certainly didn't put much effort into looking after maisie however i wasn't going to argue with my sobbing daughter so we both went home and spent the evening crying and i didn't contact john the next day i sent john a text saying that maisie had sadly passed away yesterday and alex was pretty heartbroken john called me and started yelling saying he couldn't believe i would put his dog down without telling him this got my back up and i basically yelled at him right back and said maisy wasn't his dog she was mine and alex's and blah blah blah it went back and forth and neither of us was particularly polite and we have both since apologized to each other for this call however john still thinks it was wrong of me to put maisie down without telling him it's been a year and he still mentions it's snidely every now and again so am i the idiot for not telling him that i was putting maisie down you are not the idiot you can't have a dog when it's convenient he wants something to hold over you and he's using the dog to do it i'd send him a bill for the dog's care and tell him he can't talk about it being his dog until he pays up make sure you charge at least fifty dollars a day for boarding for the past seven years you are not the idiot while a call for him to come to the vet would have been nice you didn't deliberately exclude him in your grief it just didn't occur to you given his level of care and concern for maisy over the years i understand why it wouldn't register to you he's just using this now as a way to play the victim you are not the idiot i'm so sorry you lost your heart dog and i think jon is a crap puffin for making it about him instead of being there for alex even his daughter thought he wouldn't care because he didn't like the dog you were busy with your own grief [Music]

Channel: ASK GURL

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Keywords: askreddit, r/askreddit, reddit, askwomen, reddit women, askreddit real voice, reddit stories, justnomil, r/aita, r/tifu

Id: ETiTQRrk11U

Length: 18min 55sec (1135 seconds)

Published: Fri Oct 01 2021