Mindy Kaling And Emma Thompson Give Advice To Women

hello I'm Mindy Kaling and I am Dame Emma Thompson hmm I'm an extraordinary talented young writer and performer I am a two-time Oscar winning actress activist mother mother of dragons now I'm making things up and will answer some questions that we have in this cute little cop what's the best piece of advice someone told you that you still live by to this day we're always laugh in the face of disaster that's a great one my piece of advice is before you can say I love you you must be able to say I it's a riddle it's just that before you can say to somebody else that you love them you need to be able to know who you are and what you still absolutely because love romantic love is generally a projection of the impossible onto the other person who and so it's a very difficult space and you need to be very careful with it I think that's very good advice very good advice as a teenager in 2019 how do I not succumb to peer pressure but also not come off as lean that's like saying how do you lose I mean I think that the problem is everyone else does just be yourself but then what if your self is dorky to other people it's very hard yeah I think you just have to wait it out absolutely trust your instincts they are your sword and your shield and they will never let you down the things that you really feel inside yourself don't crush them down because you think that other people will think that their name but if you could stick to that you'll be safer I was moved by that like Katherine's character in late night she's strong but it's described as being mean and abrasive how do you handle being a boss lady when so few people except women in powerful positions so many of the adjectives that are used to describe a successful leader are attributed to men mmm it decisive is the most common because I'm very decisive which would be termed bossy in you know that's what people who say about women so the way I handle it is I kind of let my work speak for itself if you kind of ignore what the other people are thinking and focus on the work and the work is good then people don't think of you as bossy they think of the OSHA was decisive because the product was good and remember that personal power that is to say your character the nature of your character which is built on every action of every day the nature of that is your real power and that's the power that really counts and smoke will get you through life how do you handle rejection and stay confident in yourself especially in an industry where you hear no way more often than you hear yes how do I handle rejection very poorly actually and it's something that when you feel it enough you get more used to it and even it sort of feels less bad the other thing that has helped me with handling rejection is I'm always working on several different things that I care a lot about so at anytime if I feel rejection and one thing I'm like okay it stings and it never doesn't sting but I have other things that I'm working on that I feel equally passionate about you know I've had some rejections of work that have been genuinely I would say quite damaging in the sense that they've said they've made me feel that I better not do this anymore I could not do this but I think Mindy's right if you're creative and something's been rejected you must then turn and just start again a bit like getting back on the horse don't it not everything you do will be good however good you are not everything you do will be good and also failure is a vital importance to your development as a creative person or was any person really what's the great saying that you learn more from your failures and from your successes it is still true very true what advice do you have for people trying to navigate an office romance or relationship don't ya just don't because it will end in tears it'll end with you in the Box room wherever you keep the computer cartridges that's all not this relationship I'm not shocked but that's like okay fair enough I did it twice but the first time didn't work out so well did it No so shoosh how do you go about breaking up with friends when the relationship has turned toxic that's a good one that's a good one I think the way that I learned I used to be young and dramatic and need to have a big talk and we need to stop hanging out and what I realized was that drifting away is the way to do it I think that having a confrontation is probably the least helpful because it makes it more dramatic and more heightened and you feel like you're inextricably drawn together because there's a passion of the fight so I find that when I am with a toxic friendship that I just have to stop showing up for things cancelling plans but I was being cheerful and happy about it while I slowly enjoy and I think as someone who's very old it might be useful to be able to know that not all friendships last that friendships like books or words or feelings they sometimes are appropriate for a particular time in your life and then they become inappropriate and if you're anything like me you think I've got to do everything I can to save this friendship because you feel bad and actually you don't have to do that you can look at the friendship and say okay what what's this person bringing to me are they making me happy in any way and if they are well then you work at work continue if they're not because we're asking about particularly about toxic friendships then you need to just drift away like Molly's character and late night a lot of women slash women of color are what a few if not the only ones in their office how do you navigate being in a room where no one looks like you at least in TV comedy writing world's growing West West common which is nice than it was once it's you can't change anyone really you can't change the people you're with you could only learn from the experience you're in and then hope that in success you can create a different one I was the only woman and the only person of color on a show but that was a place where people were very open-minded but that won't always be the case the real way to get through something like that is to work hard separately on your own things so that you can succeed and create a different environment I mean I did it for years and all the boys thought that was fantastic for me because I was paying attention and so I was made to feel bad about the fact that I had no one else who was like me in the room you have to be quite self-reliant to actually so in a sense I suppose you can look at it as quite a creative space to be in because you really are forced to develop yourself what advice you have for someone trying to be an actress coming from a family that's telling you to do something more realistic you could just pretend that you work in retail and then just carry on do your audition since I'd say you know it's it's really great in the shoe department at Macy's and and that'll shut them up you don't have to tell them everything you know sometimes being creative is if you're if you're surrounded by people going oh for heaven sake get a grip you're never gonna earn a living you can just sort of lie the great thing about people who are successful as actors is I would say a majority of them did not have people supporting them I feel like we should send out machetes but some responses god sorry I'm currently stuck in a cycle of perpetual distraction Oh what do you mean any advice on how to get out of this creative slump and start writing again I'm inspired by terrible things so what I like to do is mine feeling creatively humdrum whatever as I like to just go see a terrible movie and I feel this so what some of you might visit disaster zones no I quit jitter in the Mozambique like well wait I've had a really good idea maybe that would work but no not that kind of terrible I like to see things that are bad because I it makes me feel like well I could do that so much better and I find it very inspiring weeding any magazine about the creative endeavor that you're involved in just don't ever do that because it's you always think everyone's making much better things than you and there's way too many films being made and why are you even bothering so it's good to avoid avoid that I think to keep yourself creative you have to go and walk the streets how do you get over a breakup especially when the breakup wasn't your decision arson hmm burn that house down immediately if there are curtain rods take off the ends and push prawns into the space and they will never ever be able to get rid of the smell all know where the smell is coming from [Music]

Channel: BuzzFeed Celeb

Views: 298,428

Rating: 4.961412 out of 5

Keywords: buzzfeed, buzzfeed celeb, mindy kaling, emma thompson, late night, advice, women, giving women advice, mindy kaling advice, mindy kaling giving advice, emma thompson advice, emma thompson giving advice, women get advice

Id: kXznupNZwwU

Length: 8min 57sec (537 seconds)

Published: Thu Jun 06 2019